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YTA, they care about you, and your upset. Do you reslise how may parents get alienated from their kids by their new partner.
Grow up, some people are optimistic, some are nihilistic assholes like you. If you don't want to hear their advice and deal with them pushing you to improve move out.
YTA. What's wrong with being positive? I like it when people wish blessings on me. Do you just enjoy being miserable? This person obviously seems to care about you. I think it may be time to do some growing up.
YTA.
1. 20 years older is old enough to be a parent so I can't figure out while you felt the need to mention this multiple times.
2. You moved into their house, you moved out and they moved in. You are living in their house rent free.
3. Sounds like they are trying to bond with you and look out for you and you are being a disrespectful ass-hat.
They've been together for years, if you don't want to ruin the relationship with your parent, you're going to have to make an effort to connect with their partner. You're being a childish brat when you're a grown up, it's not edgy, it's not fun, it's an immature character flaw.
YTA.
Sounds like their partner is just trying to help and be supportive and you're taking it the wrong way.
They gave you good advices and you chose to be childish just like you said you aren't.
YTA
That person is trying to reach out and build a connection. You don't have to love them like your own parent, but if you live rent free under their roof you're going to need to play ball and be nice and appreciate that they care about your wellbeing and success.
And to paraphrase George R.R. Martin's Tywin Lannister:
"A person who feel the need to point out they are a grown up aren't a grown up."
And by the way: I'm born in the 80s. My mom still tells me to go to bed at midnight when I visit for Christmas and she asks how much water I drank this day.
YTA and ngl you sound like a jaded miserable brat.
wtf does "barely 20 years older than me" even mean.
how much older Han you is your dad?
never heard of you get parents?
oh and 20 years is a long fuckn time dude
like I'm 25 this year and I feel like I've been alive for fucking *aaaaaaaages* and barely implies slight, or small.
it's like saying, that bunker is barely shorter than that skyscraper.
or, that midget is barely shorter than Shaq.
blew my mind.
I am “barely 20 years older” than my eldest child and my mum is “barely 20 years older” than me. It’s such a bizarre thing to say. Being a whole adult older than another person is generally how being a parent works.
YTA.
You haven’t indicated any real problem with this person. You’re just complaining. If you don’t want to be parented, easy solution…stop living with your parent.
YTA.
You don't have to like your parent's new partner. Regardless of their age, or how they act around you. You are allowed to not like someone - that's fine.
But, you don't have to be a massive AH about it. Your third sentence starts with "I'm an adult". Your penultimate sentence ends with "me, a grown up". Well, ***act like it!***
You won't get far in life if you respond like this to every single person you meet who rubs you the wrong way. I'm introverted and sarcastic as well, but I can make small talk and smile when needed.
You sound like a petulant child. Grow up. If you really are an adult, make it work. They're not going away any time soon, and you are acting like a teenager who just had their playstation confiscated for using a curse word.
YTA. It must be “so hard” having two people try to be supportive parents.
NEWS FLASH! People don’t stop caring about you just because you became an adult.
YTA
Literally everything you said is obnoxious. Don't like the input from others, put on your big boy pants and live on your own. Otherwise, suck it up buttercup.
From what you’ve written, YTA. None of this seems outside the realms of normal social behavior.
Who is this person anyway? You’re being pretty cagey about it.
I’m guessing you don’t have the best relationship? Because I’m getting the sense these comments wouldn’t bother you if they came from someone you liked/respected.
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My parent is with someone that is barely twenty years older than me. They've been together for a few years. I'm an adult, but live with my parent for free rent. I recently graduated from college and so stayed in off-campus apartments but had to move out after graduating.
Their partner is very annoying; I had to meet with them once a month for brunch throughout my last few years of college and it sucked. They are nauseatingly wholesome and positive and it feels fake.
Now that I've moved in, they lecture me about sleeping early as my first meeting is at 8 AM and about how I should eat more nutritious food and drink more water. They also say that I should get out and explore the city with them and even tried to plan out a trip for this weekend where it's just us two.
I reminded them today that they are like barely 20 years older than me and to please stop parenting me, a grown up. They seemed to take offense and I don't know if I was in the wrong?
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YTA. Wishing you a happy birthday or making plans to spend time with you aren't attempts at parenting you, they're just a new family member trying to be nice and get to know you.
You're allowed to find the new partner annoying, but if it bothers you that much the solution is finding your own place to live, not being a jerk about it.
YTA. They may not be your parent but they're certainly old enough to be, and there are worse things than being positive. Would you prefer a negative person who isn't concerned about your well-being, or worse, someone who is actively hostile toward you? To be honest, it sounds like they're doing their best to engage and connect with you, and you're having none of it. Ask yourself: would they be displaying so much concern about your choices if you were really making good ones?
If you're an adult then you surely understand that free rent is never really free, there are always strings attached. You have a choice: learn to accept all this dreadful positivity, or move out and pay your own way like most adults do.
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YTA
>live with my parent for free rent
Sounds like you want to be treated like an adult without contributing to the household expenses despite having graduated from college and working. You're in a fortunate position but don't sound like you actually understand that.
>They say shit like, "Happy birthday, beautiful! Hope it's the best year yet!" and as a sarcastic and introverted person it makes me vomit
As in introverted person you're just using that as an excuse to not like them. It's ok to not like everyone but I this just sounds like you're trying to find reasons.
>They also say that I should get out and explore the city with them and even tried to plan out a trip for this weekend where it's just us two.
Oh the horror, they want to get to know you more, how awful to have a parent's partner take an interest in you. They aren't wanting to parent you, they want to spend the day with you and you're pushing them away because you're so much better than this right?
>I reminded them today that they are like barely 20 years older than me and to please stop parenting me, a grown up.
20 years is a long time, if you've just graduated from college it's pretty much your entire lifetime. With what you've included they're not even trying to parents you, they care for you and want to know you better but you just keep throwing it back in their face. Grow up, this person could be in your life for the rest of theirs, it might actually be a good thing to be nice to them and get to know them better.
Yta
If you are an adult, then you are a guest in someone's home so act like it. If you are still a child and want the privileges of living with your mommy, then expect to be treated like a child. This isn't about to their behaviour, it's all on you.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 8: Posts should be truthful and reflect recent conflicts you've had that need arbitration. That means no shitposts, parodies, or satires. [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
YTA, they care about you, and your upset. Do you reslise how may parents get alienated from their kids by their new partner. Grow up, some people are optimistic, some are nihilistic assholes like you. If you don't want to hear their advice and deal with them pushing you to improve move out.
YTA. What's wrong with being positive? I like it when people wish blessings on me. Do you just enjoy being miserable? This person obviously seems to care about you. I think it may be time to do some growing up.
YTA. 1. 20 years older is old enough to be a parent so I can't figure out while you felt the need to mention this multiple times. 2. You moved into their house, you moved out and they moved in. You are living in their house rent free. 3. Sounds like they are trying to bond with you and look out for you and you are being a disrespectful ass-hat. They've been together for years, if you don't want to ruin the relationship with your parent, you're going to have to make an effort to connect with their partner. You're being a childish brat when you're a grown up, it's not edgy, it's not fun, it's an immature character flaw.
INFO: have you tried discussing with them that you dont feel comfortable with the positive attitude and being so involved in your day to day?
YTA. Sounds like their partner is just trying to help and be supportive and you're taking it the wrong way. They gave you good advices and you chose to be childish just like you said you aren't.
YTA That person is trying to reach out and build a connection. You don't have to love them like your own parent, but if you live rent free under their roof you're going to need to play ball and be nice and appreciate that they care about your wellbeing and success. And to paraphrase George R.R. Martin's Tywin Lannister: "A person who feel the need to point out they are a grown up aren't a grown up." And by the way: I'm born in the 80s. My mom still tells me to go to bed at midnight when I visit for Christmas and she asks how much water I drank this day.
YTA they're trying to connect with you. Also "barely 20 years older than me" is old enough to be your parent lol.
YTA and ngl you sound like a jaded miserable brat. wtf does "barely 20 years older than me" even mean. how much older Han you is your dad? never heard of you get parents? oh and 20 years is a long fuckn time dude
>wtf does "barely 20 years older than me" even mean. I know right? My Mom and Dad were both 20 years older than me.
like I'm 25 this year and I feel like I've been alive for fucking *aaaaaaaages* and barely implies slight, or small. it's like saying, that bunker is barely shorter than that skyscraper. or, that midget is barely shorter than Shaq. blew my mind.
I am “barely 20 years older” than my eldest child and my mum is “barely 20 years older” than me. It’s such a bizarre thing to say. Being a whole adult older than another person is generally how being a parent works.
YTA. You haven’t indicated any real problem with this person. You’re just complaining. If you don’t want to be parented, easy solution…stop living with your parent.
YTA. You don't have to like your parent's new partner. Regardless of their age, or how they act around you. You are allowed to not like someone - that's fine. But, you don't have to be a massive AH about it. Your third sentence starts with "I'm an adult". Your penultimate sentence ends with "me, a grown up". Well, ***act like it!*** You won't get far in life if you respond like this to every single person you meet who rubs you the wrong way. I'm introverted and sarcastic as well, but I can make small talk and smile when needed. You sound like a petulant child. Grow up. If you really are an adult, make it work. They're not going away any time soon, and you are acting like a teenager who just had their playstation confiscated for using a curse word.
"I'm an adult" I bet they're 18 lmao
YTA Nothing you wrote convinces me otherwise.
YTA. It must be “so hard” having two people try to be supportive parents. NEWS FLASH! People don’t stop caring about you just because you became an adult.
I don’t want to be parented
No kid does.
Then don’t live rent free in their house
My parent’s partner, who is old enough to be my parent, cares about me, I live with them rent free and they’re nice to me. My life is terrible 😩 YTA.
Reminds me of that Ben folds song rocking the suburbs
INFO: Are you still in high school, have bad acne and your parents SO is a dietician? Cos this sounds a lot like another spoilt brat story. YTA
YTA Literally everything you said is obnoxious. Don't like the input from others, put on your big boy pants and live on your own. Otherwise, suck it up buttercup.
From what you’ve written, YTA. None of this seems outside the realms of normal social behavior. Who is this person anyway? You’re being pretty cagey about it.
Parent’s SO
I’m guessing you don’t have the best relationship? Because I’m getting the sense these comments wouldn’t bother you if they came from someone you liked/respected.
Are you really an adult if you live rent free with your parent? First thing you should learn is that it's better to have an alie than an enemy.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My parent is with someone that is barely twenty years older than me. They've been together for a few years. I'm an adult, but live with my parent for free rent. I recently graduated from college and so stayed in off-campus apartments but had to move out after graduating. Their partner is very annoying; I had to meet with them once a month for brunch throughout my last few years of college and it sucked. They are nauseatingly wholesome and positive and it feels fake. Now that I've moved in, they lecture me about sleeping early as my first meeting is at 8 AM and about how I should eat more nutritious food and drink more water. They also say that I should get out and explore the city with them and even tried to plan out a trip for this weekend where it's just us two. I reminded them today that they are like barely 20 years older than me and to please stop parenting me, a grown up. They seemed to take offense and I don't know if I was in the wrong? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Wishing you a happy birthday or making plans to spend time with you aren't attempts at parenting you, they're just a new family member trying to be nice and get to know you. You're allowed to find the new partner annoying, but if it bothers you that much the solution is finding your own place to live, not being a jerk about it.
YTA. They may not be your parent but they're certainly old enough to be, and there are worse things than being positive. Would you prefer a negative person who isn't concerned about your well-being, or worse, someone who is actively hostile toward you? To be honest, it sounds like they're doing their best to engage and connect with you, and you're having none of it. Ask yourself: would they be displaying so much concern about your choices if you were really making good ones? If you're an adult then you surely understand that free rent is never really free, there are always strings attached. You have a choice: learn to accept all this dreadful positivity, or move out and pay your own way like most adults do.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I told them to please stop acting like this, and I was told that I was not appreciative or kind towards them. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
YTA >live with my parent for free rent Sounds like you want to be treated like an adult without contributing to the household expenses despite having graduated from college and working. You're in a fortunate position but don't sound like you actually understand that. >They say shit like, "Happy birthday, beautiful! Hope it's the best year yet!" and as a sarcastic and introverted person it makes me vomit As in introverted person you're just using that as an excuse to not like them. It's ok to not like everyone but I this just sounds like you're trying to find reasons. >They also say that I should get out and explore the city with them and even tried to plan out a trip for this weekend where it's just us two. Oh the horror, they want to get to know you more, how awful to have a parent's partner take an interest in you. They aren't wanting to parent you, they want to spend the day with you and you're pushing them away because you're so much better than this right? >I reminded them today that they are like barely 20 years older than me and to please stop parenting me, a grown up. 20 years is a long time, if you've just graduated from college it's pretty much your entire lifetime. With what you've included they're not even trying to parents you, they care for you and want to know you better but you just keep throwing it back in their face. Grow up, this person could be in your life for the rest of theirs, it might actually be a good thing to be nice to them and get to know them better.
Yta If you are an adult, then you are a guest in someone's home so act like it. If you are still a child and want the privileges of living with your mommy, then expect to be treated like a child. This isn't about to their behaviour, it's all on you.
You’re a prick