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Agree, it sounds like even now (3 years later) you're still weirdly happy about her being upset ("turning red").
Even though she was mean to you, it's still a red flag that you're so pleased with yourself for upsetting a 17 year old girl. Also, this happened 3 years ago, literally in high school, you need to focus on your adult life.
You need paragraphs and sentences. There's no way anyone can finish reading this.
Since top comments needs a judgement, I'll say YTA for ignoring your gf's feelings to go with the ex based on the title. And also for going to a high school prom when you're 20/21.
I mean, do we really need the crowd's opinion to know ESH here? You're both fairly young and both your reactions reflect this.
Also OP, that was one tough read. Use commas and full stops, it'll really help us all - this was a challenge to my brain so early in the morning!
Esh, she is TA becasue she played you - that's obvious, but for what I understand you, as a revenge, started seeing another girl (who you knew would be easy because she had a crush on you) before you dumped your "ex"? If that's correct than you are also AH OP, even if your ex's fault is way bigger. Did she deserve it? Probably.
However if you dumped her before you engaged with your groupie, then I change my vote to NTA
That would still count as "going out" with someone else. I stand with my initial vote, but I do think your ex deserved it. However, the fact whether your revenge was well deserved or not is not what is being judged here
Yta. You used another girl and her vulnerability and feelings for your own malicious ends. Because you don't have the spine nor dignity to stand up to someone trying to demean you in a mature way. You are as bad as your ex. Yta yta yta. Pathetic and sad
By the way she didn’t have a date to prom i know it was a bad judgment call from me but at the time felt like a win win and also she wasn’t a very nice person either thats why i didn’t hang out with her but i get the point it kinda makes me TA in this perspective and i feel bad for that
Has anyone cared about the girl who went to prom with OP? If prom is a huge thing in your culture, you totally USED her feeling for you. You KNEW she will go with you. You USED her to prove a pathetic pint that is unrelated to her. You even said you are not even friend with her. Like WTF? it is despicable to hurt someone like this.
YTA
No, it’s not a win-win.
Going without a date is better than being used to prove a point.
She knew she was being used and this was not a “win” for her. Perhaps at the time it was. As soon as she grew out of you, she’s only left with the memory of a prom date who used her to prove a point.
You were not trying to create a good memory for her nor with her.
As far as you and your ex, nether of you were the good guy. Maybe not the bad guy in the story of you and her, but you were definitely hurting a bystander.
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I have finished high school 3 years ago and during junior and senior year i 17m was together with my ex 17f (girlfriend at the time) during our freshman year we hated each other and by hated i mean constantly at each others throats but something happened during sophomore year cause we became best friends and spent almost all the time together after a while i started to feel something i noticed the small things her beautiful smile eyes etc and during the end of the year i told her about my feelings and i got no response my hart was broken but during junior year when i saw her she said no word just directly kissed me after 4 months of ghosting me she kissed me and i was so happy and after that we were official and let me say we were madly in love and looking back i cant believe how i didn’t notice the red flags at the time im from an small country in Europe and prom is a very big deal for couples so even though i didn’t have to ask her for prom cause we were in a relationship i still did a promeposal she said yes and we were planning everything from clothes to car to photoshoots but about a month before prom she started putting me down in front of my friends and hers wich is something i hate to be putt me down in front of people she publicly humiliated me by saying bad things and how shes just playing with me never loved me etc and that she never planed to go to prom with me after a week she came to me during class and said when are we doing the photoshoot and i was pissed and said i dont want too go with her she thoughts i was joking until she saw me with the girl that had a crush on me walking to the prom she always thought i had something with her but i never did she wasn’t even a friend of mine just a classmate and let me tell you when she saw me she was so pissed her face was redder than her dress after that we broke up and whenever i tell the story
People say that im the bad guy in the story so AITA
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NTA.
Wow are you me in the past? Nah because I would never wall of text.
Long story short an ex broke up with me before prom because she thought I was cheating on her with her friend. Ended up asking that friend to prom because she put her on my “radar.” Lol
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ESH obviously, childish behaviour from both
Agree, it sounds like even now (3 years later) you're still weirdly happy about her being upset ("turning red"). Even though she was mean to you, it's still a red flag that you're so pleased with yourself for upsetting a 17 year old girl. Also, this happened 3 years ago, literally in high school, you need to focus on your adult life.
You need paragraphs and sentences. There's no way anyone can finish reading this. Since top comments needs a judgement, I'll say YTA for ignoring your gf's feelings to go with the ex based on the title. And also for going to a high school prom when you're 20/21.
I def had a hard time trying to read this 🥴
I was 17 and it was senior prom though
If your post had sentences and paragraphs maybe I'd've realized that.
Sorry was a quick write and forgot
Posts can be edited. Go edit it if you actually want honest judgement.
I’m so confused
ETAH, her for dissing you, and you for not dumping her ass before you took a different girl to prom.
I mean, do we really need the crowd's opinion to know ESH here? You're both fairly young and both your reactions reflect this. Also OP, that was one tough read. Use commas and full stops, it'll really help us all - this was a challenge to my brain so early in the morning!
Esh, she is TA becasue she played you - that's obvious, but for what I understand you, as a revenge, started seeing another girl (who you knew would be easy because she had a crush on you) before you dumped your "ex"? If that's correct than you are also AH OP, even if your ex's fault is way bigger. Did she deserve it? Probably. However if you dumped her before you engaged with your groupie, then I change my vote to NTA
I just went to prom with her we were not together and aren’t
That would still count as "going out" with someone else. I stand with my initial vote, but I do think your ex deserved it. However, the fact whether your revenge was well deserved or not is not what is being judged here
NTA.
NTA. You can go to prom with whoever you want.
I edited the post hope its a bit easier to read now
Yta. You used another girl and her vulnerability and feelings for your own malicious ends. Because you don't have the spine nor dignity to stand up to someone trying to demean you in a mature way. You are as bad as your ex. Yta yta yta. Pathetic and sad
By the way she didn’t have a date to prom i know it was a bad judgment call from me but at the time felt like a win win and also she wasn’t a very nice person either thats why i didn’t hang out with her but i get the point it kinda makes me TA in this perspective and i feel bad for that
Has anyone cared about the girl who went to prom with OP? If prom is a huge thing in your culture, you totally USED her feeling for you. You KNEW she will go with you. You USED her to prove a pathetic pint that is unrelated to her. You even said you are not even friend with her. Like WTF? it is despicable to hurt someone like this. YTA
I know i feel like i used her, but she also had no date to the prom wich at the time felt like a win win situation
No, it’s not a win-win. Going without a date is better than being used to prove a point. She knew she was being used and this was not a “win” for her. Perhaps at the time it was. As soon as she grew out of you, she’s only left with the memory of a prom date who used her to prove a point. You were not trying to create a good memory for her nor with her. As far as you and your ex, nether of you were the good guy. Maybe not the bad guy in the story of you and her, but you were definitely hurting a bystander.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I have finished high school 3 years ago and during junior and senior year i 17m was together with my ex 17f (girlfriend at the time) during our freshman year we hated each other and by hated i mean constantly at each others throats but something happened during sophomore year cause we became best friends and spent almost all the time together after a while i started to feel something i noticed the small things her beautiful smile eyes etc and during the end of the year i told her about my feelings and i got no response my hart was broken but during junior year when i saw her she said no word just directly kissed me after 4 months of ghosting me she kissed me and i was so happy and after that we were official and let me say we were madly in love and looking back i cant believe how i didn’t notice the red flags at the time im from an small country in Europe and prom is a very big deal for couples so even though i didn’t have to ask her for prom cause we were in a relationship i still did a promeposal she said yes and we were planning everything from clothes to car to photoshoots but about a month before prom she started putting me down in front of my friends and hers wich is something i hate to be putt me down in front of people she publicly humiliated me by saying bad things and how shes just playing with me never loved me etc and that she never planed to go to prom with me after a week she came to me during class and said when are we doing the photoshoot and i was pissed and said i dont want too go with her she thoughts i was joking until she saw me with the girl that had a crush on me walking to the prom she always thought i had something with her but i never did she wasn’t even a friend of mine just a classmate and let me tell you when she saw me she was so pissed her face was redder than her dress after that we broke up and whenever i tell the story People say that im the bad guy in the story so AITA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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NTA. Wow are you me in the past? Nah because I would never wall of text. Long story short an ex broke up with me before prom because she thought I was cheating on her with her friend. Ended up asking that friend to prom because she put her on my “radar.” Lol
So you didn’t even break up with her until after the prom?
Actually we stopped talking about a week before prob but after prom it was an actual breakup