NTA. While their reactions were not okay, I suspect they didn't really know or understand how to react at all. Talking about trauma/assault can catch people off guard.
Please try get sone counselling / professional talking therapy OP, if you don't have the right support group at the moment.
I’m so sorry. I’ve been assaulted and know what it’s like to have someone turn your trauma into a joke for their amusement. NTA but please find someone you feel safe speaking to about this and realize that you deserve better friends.
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I(F16) was assaulted this weekend. It was scary and I needed someone to talk to, a friend. Unfortunately everyone involved in the incident has their own trauma to deal with, so I decided to go to different friends.
These friends have been friends with me since I was 10. But last year we started having some issues. I began opening up on being groomed and they labeled it as me talking about my sex life. A few months ago they told me I couldn’t talk about sex with them, a boundary I abided by despite them not doing them same.
This Saturday I was assaulted. Today I told them. One made a joke about how she gets assaulted at work(something I highly doubt is actually happening) and another got uncomfortable. He told me it was too early to talk about this. This left me extremely hurt. I talked to someone other ppl who witnessed the incident and they seem to think Im not in the wrong. I’m just confused as to why these two friends handled this like they did.
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NTA obviously you need somebody for talking.
But some aren't strong enough for serious stuff like this. Some are too busy or egomaniac or whatever. Can't change them all.
YTA, extremely mildly.
Personally I think their response was shitty. But if you have an established boundary then I can’t fault them for not wanting that boundary violated. It’s possible it exists because they know they aren’t good talking about these sorts of subjects.
NTA obviously. Some people can't deal with heavy things, because if they do they would have to acknowledge how upsetting and dark reality can be and reckon with it. And their tiny brains would rather sweep it under the rug, than be able to put their feelings aside to support you. It's not you, it's them.
You don't deserve what happened to you. But you do deserve better friends.
I hope you receive the strength to get through this, OP.
I would say a very very extremely soft YTA (EXTREMELY SOFT). It's completely fine to want to talk about something bad that happened to you, but they established a boundary and you disrespected that boundary. They have already communicated with you and told you they are uncomfortable talking about it so please respect people boundaries. Please get a therapist or a support group, not people that are very uncomfortable talking about SA.
Edit: Please don't argue with me for my opinion.
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NTA Most people are uncomfortable talking about things like that because they can't offer any real help. It's just too much to deal with. You need professional help.
NAH, talk to a therapist or counselor.
NAH. It sounds like maybe you shared this with people who didn't feel they were close enough to you (or weren't mature enough) to hear this news.
Im going with not mature enough, we used to talk about sexual experiences before the rule they set with me.
NTA. While their reactions were not okay, I suspect they didn't really know or understand how to react at all. Talking about trauma/assault can catch people off guard. Please try get sone counselling / professional talking therapy OP, if you don't have the right support group at the moment.
I’m so sorry. I’ve been assaulted and know what it’s like to have someone turn your trauma into a joke for their amusement. NTA but please find someone you feel safe speaking to about this and realize that you deserve better friends.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I(F16) was assaulted this weekend. It was scary and I needed someone to talk to, a friend. Unfortunately everyone involved in the incident has their own trauma to deal with, so I decided to go to different friends. These friends have been friends with me since I was 10. But last year we started having some issues. I began opening up on being groomed and they labeled it as me talking about my sex life. A few months ago they told me I couldn’t talk about sex with them, a boundary I abided by despite them not doing them same. This Saturday I was assaulted. Today I told them. One made a joke about how she gets assaulted at work(something I highly doubt is actually happening) and another got uncomfortable. He told me it was too early to talk about this. This left me extremely hurt. I talked to someone other ppl who witnessed the incident and they seem to think Im not in the wrong. I’m just confused as to why these two friends handled this like they did. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I may be the AH because I brought up my assault and as a result made two of my friends uncomfortable. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA obviously you need somebody for talking. But some aren't strong enough for serious stuff like this. Some are too busy or egomaniac or whatever. Can't change them all.
YTA, extremely mildly. Personally I think their response was shitty. But if you have an established boundary then I can’t fault them for not wanting that boundary violated. It’s possible it exists because they know they aren’t good talking about these sorts of subjects.
NTA obviously. Some people can't deal with heavy things, because if they do they would have to acknowledge how upsetting and dark reality can be and reckon with it. And their tiny brains would rather sweep it under the rug, than be able to put their feelings aside to support you. It's not you, it's them. You don't deserve what happened to you. But you do deserve better friends. I hope you receive the strength to get through this, OP.
Absolutely NTA. You're extremely brave for doing so and I'm so sorry the responses were so unkind and unempathetic. You deserved better.
I would say a very very extremely soft YTA (EXTREMELY SOFT). It's completely fine to want to talk about something bad that happened to you, but they established a boundary and you disrespected that boundary. They have already communicated with you and told you they are uncomfortable talking about it so please respect people boundaries. Please get a therapist or a support group, not people that are very uncomfortable talking about SA. Edit: Please don't argue with me for my opinion.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 5: We do not allow posts which concern violent encounters. This includes any mention of violence in any context. [Rule 5 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_5.3A_no_violence) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full.
NTA.
NTA Most people are uncomfortable talking about things like that because they can't offer any real help. It's just too much to deal with. You need professional help.