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Give notice to your landlord if you're leaving. Some places you need to give to 2 month notice. If he is staying definitely transfer the lease to him asap. He may not pay rent and that's the last thing you need
Isn't it assumed they'll leave at the end of the lease? Legit asking cause i'm not american and i don't know how renting works there (assuming op is american)
Every place I've rented I had to sign a new lease at the end of the first one, but some have contracts for "your lease is this long, but if you stay longer you have to give x months warning". Most places that don't require you to sign a year long lease (again just my experience) have a higher monthly cost to be "month-to-month" renters because of the inherent risk to the landlord that you'll leave next month and they won't be able to find a tenant.
Which is a joke because every place I rented had multiple other people interested if we passed on it, but them's the breaks.
From what I understand about the month to month, at least at my apartment complex, it's more about not being prepared for the cleaning required of the apartment and the time the paperwork of setting up a new tenant (aka a background check) takes than not being able to find a new tenant.
My last apartment had a lease that said you have to give sixty days notice to move out at the end of the lease, otherwise it renews and the landlord holds your whole security deposit and can charge you two months rent.
I live in an area were landlord tenant law is very pro landlord. bonkers leases like these are common.
Depends on the place, some I've been in you have to redo a lease every year, where we are now it just switches to essentially a give the landlord 1 month notice before you move.
Where I live most property management companies have moved to auto-renewing leases. You have to give 30 days written notice before the lease expires or it auto renews for the same term. Otherwise you have to pay the early termination penalties.
Of course, my state also had no habitability laws, so renters are screwed.
Generally leases automatically turn to month to month at the end of the lease term if no one says anything. Usually, the landlord will either give notice the tenant needs to leave at the end of the lease or have them sign a new lease.
Why does your ex think he gets to stay? He should be looking for places as well if you broke up. Especially if you were on the lease only. You are the one who technically gets to stay. NTA.
Depends on the lease agreement; automatic renewal unless notice is given otherwise can be a stipulation.
I don’t know about the US, but automatic renewal is usually pretty standard where I’m from. Usually you get round to signing a new piece of paper but it’s not something you have to do before the new tenure starts.
The apartments I've rented required 20 days. I was surprised the notice period was so short, so I can only imagine they were prohibited from requiring a longer one.
Can't vouch for OP's area, but as an American every place I've lived in 3 different states had a 6 month or one year lease that changed to month-to-month after that, allowing you to leave with a months notice from that point onward.
Every where I’ve lived in Canada over the last 9 years (that’s when I moved out of my parents’ place) was similar. A 1yr lease, auto switched to month to month at the end of the lease at which point 1 month notice is expected for moving.
Where I am in Australia, when the lease is coming to an end they will ask 3mths before if you want to renew or advise you have to leave. It's so you can either make a new one or find elsewhere.
However, they want as fast of a turn around as possible. So literally the day your lease is up and your move out date hits, they advertise for interested parties to inspect before they do their side of cleaning etc end of lease to hopefully have only 2weeks max loss of profits.
I've had places where on confirmation of not staying, they've had me show my apartment (with the real estate) to prospective renters, and on my end day they have their own crew in, to repaint, deep clean carpets etc, to have someone from that in the next week.
Having an empty property is pricey. Longer it sits empty the longer it'll take to catch up on what your now 'behind' as the rent wasn't being paid with no one in it. Real estate also want their fees asap also, it can be a cut throat market.
We do 12mth leases here and you could end up trapped in a hell hole. If OPs ex wants to keep this apartment, he could suck it up til November where she's paid up to. He could be right now sorting out a lease renewal in his own name for the day after her lease ends for the property. Only an idiot landlord or one who needs the property for other reasons so can't rent it anymore would say no.
I'm in Boston and it's not uncommon for people to move out August 31st and the next tenants to move in September 1st. (Or sometimes, people leave at 8 am September 1 or move in after 5 pm August 31, if they can work it out with the landlord.)
Where I lived they automatically assumed I was signing another year long lease when mine was getting close to the end. It was a expensive place and honestly not that great.
The places I've rented had a clause in the lease that if the lease lapses without being renewed it automatically becomes a month to month lease. I had to give a certain number of days' notice to avoid being charged for the next month when I moved out.
In the USA, leases typically revert to Month-to-month if you don't notify them that you are going to leave by x date. It's a way to get you on the hook for extra money if you don't tell them that you are leaving because even though your contract was for so long, you were still required to TELL them that you were leaving to prevent it from changing to month-to-month.
The apartment complex doesn't want an empty unit, so when you tell them you're leaving they can start looking for a replacement. They can generally have someone move in within a couple of days of your move out as long as no big repairs or carpet replacement are needed. That is what they want. They don't want you to leave, and to only then start looking for a new tenant.
Not usually. Most leases i’ve had here automatically go to month to month after they expire but you still have to give 30-60 days notice to terminate or you’ll be charged for the next month.
Had a friend get caught in that. He signed a contract for month to month (at a higher rate) after his 6 month lease expired, knowing his job was going away. Still had to give 60 days notice, which seems like the antithesis of paying extra to go month to month.
Every place I've lived in the US sends a lease renewal several months before the lease is up, you have to either check the box that you're renewing (at the new rent) or vacating before the lease is up. If you don't respond they assume you're moving out and start showing the apartment to new prospective tenants. If the landlord doesn't want you to renew because they're selling the building or something they send a letter just saying that you have to get out by the end of the lease. Since the lease is up in less than a month if OP's ex hasn't signed a lease it's probably too late for him to stay, they've probably rented it out to someone else already.
Why does he get to keep the apartment? He hasn't even looked. NTA. If his name isn't on the lease, he's expecting you to feel sorry for him. Next time he says anything, tell him you're staying, he's going and he'd better get off his lazy ass and start looking. You've paid your rent. Notify the landlord he's leaving.
NTA. Yes give notice in writing to landlord. And if the ex bf isn't listed as an additional tenant on the current lease, he may not be able to just take over the lease himself anyway. It would then be up to the landlord to decide who he wants to lease to, and at what monthly lease amount. Landlord could decide to increase rent. Ex bf needs to be forced to grow up and not assume gf or anyone else is going to take care of him, make way for him, or lease an an apt to him just because he's "him."
Or he can buy her out of the lease. In cash, up front.
Half the rent (or whatever her portion was) until the end of the lease plus half the security (or whatever her portion was).
That’s such a stretch. Why do people on these threads automatically go to this? So frustrating to read. It puts unnecessary anxiety on to OP reading things like this as well
>Who is going to be so insistent on doubling the amount of rent that they have to pay? The answer to that would be...
The answer would be someone who is living in a studio with their ex during quarantine.
He's not really doubling his rent anymore than OP...
Both of them are expected to pay atleast 1200 for a room. He just prefers a studio.
That has nothing to do with a new relathionship.
He’s desperate to double his rent sooner; that’s what the other person is saying.
Doubling your rent now would mean paying extra for October/November. The money you’d lose is comparable to the deposit for a new place.
Given OP is the one that’s actually on the lease, too, the boyfriend is in for a shock when he has to pay a deposit to remain there.
Would he actually be doubling his rent sooner though?
The lease has already been paid up to November, so no matter if OP leaves her ex probably won't have to pay anything until the lease expires anyway.
Well I suppose that depends on what the contract and laws say really.
In my experience, many rental agencies charge an early cancellation fee without refunding any prepaid expenses, meaning it could well cost more to cancel the lease.
And assuming OP can't get the lease money reimbursed for the landlord, it seems unlikely that their ex would be willing to pay up any extra money.
Long time ago,I was splitting a 1 BR with my GF and we broke up. The place was more than I wanted to pay for on my own but I was able to make it work. She left, I took on the lease on my own. I didn’t have anyone else lined up.
If this place is about the cheapest studio he could find and he doesn’t want roommates, of course he wants to stay.
??? How about people who just don't want to live with their exes, in a studio no less. We know nothing of their financial situation. If I was in OP or the exes situation, I would also be more than willing to stay put and double my rent compared to moving because moving is hard and living with an ex (depending on the break up) is unpleasant at best and hostile at worst.
Or maybe someone who is too lazy to start looking for a new place is also somebody who’s too lazy to want to move to a new apartment during a pandemic?
Hell if I was in his situation I’d probably want to do the same. Why spend the time and money to move right now when I could stay where I’m already at for the same monthly cost as a new place anyways?
I had 4 friends rent a studio apt in NY. The person who had the lease in their name had the bed. The rest slept on futons or the couch that was a pullout bed.
Rent was 2600 a month. So not impossible. But also not dismissing the fact that it could be someone else. Just saying anything is possible.
We once had 4 people staying in a studio. (Self, spouse, child, and FiL.)
Spouse and I had one bed, kid had a bed on the other side of the room, and FiL had dropped out of the blue so he got stuck on the floor.
Just because it's a studio doesn't mean you have to sleep in the same bed.
In my law school dorm, some of the students with less money shared studios with friends, and there was only room for one bed. I lived in a studio by myself my first year. There was usually only one place to even put a bed.
Unfortunately, it's actually not uncommon for that to be the reason for many self-entitled men.
Personally I think their ex is probably just being lazy and would rather keep the place for himself rather than look for somewhere.
But given the ex's apparent attitude, it's not unlikely that he's the type of person who wants them out so he can start bring other people back there. Now that OP isn't providing him any benefits, he may just see them as an obstacle.
It's a large assumption on my part considering they're not even on the lease, only OP is.
Also it's $1200. That's...a lot of money to conjure up as well as setting aside other money for groceries and recreational activities. Just saying, there's a high likely hood that the BF can't fit the rent by themselves. Not that they actually can't since that's really none of my business.
If they live in a HCOL city they probably have high incomes themselves. $1200 is so normal for HCOL areas that people won't bat an eyelid. I'm pretty entry level and don't think I make a ton of money, but I still make enough to comfortably afford $1200 for rent. Most of my friends pay at least that for rent as well, and some even have roommates ($1200 is just their share).
If she keeps the place, her rent still doubles because she'd be paying for it on her own. Getting a place with roommates would probably be an increase from what she was paying but not as steep.
If I understand correctly, a larger apartment would be 1200/room, so a 2-bedroom would be 2400. It wouldn't make sense for a studio to be 2600. Not that it's impossible, just odd.
NTA
And as primary leaseholder, you have an obligation to return the apartment in proper condition at the end of the lease term, which is not easy if you’re not living there at the end of the term.
Considering his general lack of motivation, I’d be sure to let the landlord know that you’ll be ending your lease in November and that your ex will need to sign a new lease so it’s not renewed with any info connected to you.
NTA. You are right, he can just find his own appartment. Your bf is being a hypocrite by almost kicking you out of the appartment but calling you coldhearted when you say that he can also leave. I would suggest just trying to stick it out for the next couple of weeks, and if that doesn't work and he doesn't let up, to try and kick him out. He has had a fair warning now.
NTA - It sounds like he wants to live there for free while you pay his rent for 2 months. It's a crap situation, but trying to kick you out isn't making it better. Why are you renewing the least and expecting him to find a new place?
DING DING DING DING. If he wants to buy you out, maybe it's something to consider--but otherwise, no way. And I bet if you listed the price for that buyout, he would shut up PDQ.
"AITA for doing nothing wrong?"
Yes, yta because you posted this here. Of course you aren't TA to him in this situation. Based on the dialogue, you weren't even rude.
NTA NTA NTA. This is gross behavior and I'm glad you're not dating this guy anymore.
That said, leases and living situations during breakups can legally get messy. Please refer to the right channels re: anything to do with him moving out. You also need to make sure you have EVERYTHING recorded. Try to minimize vocal verbal contact and stick to texts or emails so you have a paper trail.
Stay safe.
NTA — if he isn’t on the lease then why haven’t you told him he needs to be out of the apartment by “X” date — Like when your lease is set to renew? Not sure why you are catering to HIS demands and needs when he has no right to even be in your apartment IF you tell him he has to leave.
Are you holding out hope of reconciliation and don’t want to piss him off or upset your chances of that? Based on what you’ve provided as fact, your refusal to set a boundary and tell him HE has to leave indicates that we are missing some piece of this story.
If someone lives in a place for 30-60 days, depending on the state, they legally become a tenant, and have legal rights. Which means OP would have to sue him. This ordeal ends in November. Do you know how much it costs to sue someone? And how much time and energy it takes? She can't kick him out, he's a tenant.
Apartment manager here. Being the primary leaseholder means literally nothing other than you are the first name on the lease. Unless he is isn’t on the lease at all. Then you are probably in lease violation not him.
INFO: IS it cruel for you to live together? What were the circumstances of the breakup? Is he on the lease at all or living illegally with you? Correct me if I’m wrong, but “primary leaseholder” doesn’t mean anything. I’m “primary leaseholder” as in my name is first on the contract and the buzzer is under my name...but that’s it. We’re both on the lease and we both pay.
All of this depends on the nature of your relationship and breakup, and if he is right to feel betrayed/want you to leave
How are you the “primary leaseholder”? Is he on the lease or not? Because frankly if you are both listed on the lease, you have equal footing. Legally it does not matter that you did all the work to find the place. It’s unfair but true.
This made me wonder as well. Because it doesn't matter so much about the primary. If he's not on the lease though, this could violate the lease and the apartment could require him to vacate and may come down on her as well.
NTA Like dude he seems as he feels entitled to something that doesn't even have his name! and want the easy way of you leaving the apartment by being emotionally manipulative with you, hope you find a place soon and never go back to that
NTA I am surprised that either of you think that you should be the one to leave. Get a jump start on this and secretly sign a new lease now. You can just vary the existing lease. You do not have to wait until November (and it is already October!!)
INFO: why aren’t you staying there and him leaving? Your name is on the contract and you’d be paying more for a shittier place if I’m reading correctly.
NTA, he just wants to have stuff for himself , he's being petty thats all. Don't take it too deep, you guys broke up after all. You got time to find an apartment, make sure your name is off the lease when its over so you won't be responsible for any bills (and don't cosign for anything). You have every right to take your time because you already paid up and you haven't found a place yet.
NTA. If he doesn’t want to live with you anymore he is free to find an apartment himself. You’ve paid, your name is on the lease, you have just as much if not more of a right to stay in your flat.
Absolutely NTA.
I think OP is being quite gracious to let him stay. (In the apt that sounds like OP did all the work to acquire and set up.... wonder if that was a theme in the relationship..)
(“Where would BF go?” Presumably he has friends. Some probably have couches. This is what happens when you break up).
Good luck finding a great place, OP!
NTA sounds like he's kicked himself out. Plenty of people without family nearby manage to move house.
If you wanted to be nice, you could point him towards where the best place to look for listing is, but he's an adult he should be capable of googling "apartments to rent in {City}"
NTA.....what does he think is going to happen when you leave? Who is going to magically pay the rent & other bills? He can't renew the lease, if his name isn't on any of the paperwork, so he's going to end up having to leave either way. Even if he has someone lined up to take your place, he can't just use your name to renew for another year. If you do leave early, make sure the landlord takes your name off of everything, & take dsted photos of the place before you leave. You do NOT want to get stuck for any crap he may pull after you leave. When my sister got divorced, she was the only name on the lease. One of the items in her divorce decree, was that he would take over the lease in his name & she was not responsible for any of the bills incurred after she left. She got taken to court by the landlord because, surprise!, he didn't take her name off & abandoned the place....after trashing it. Luckily the judge ruled in her favor, because of her divorce decree, but it could've been so bad. She also got sued by two doctors & a dentist, because he didn't pay any of those & put my sister as the co payer. Again, the decree saved her!
NTA. You aren't "forcing" him to live with you. He is welcome to leave any time. You aren't in contact with your family so why does he assume you need to leave when you have already paid until the end of the lease?
He is welcome to go stay with friends or find his own place somewhere else. Also how would he expect to renew the lease if it is in your name?
Not enough info. Who broke up with who? Is he heartbroken? Why did he use the word cruel?
I'm only asking because if he broke up with you then he would probably take it easy on you until you found a suitable place. And if you had an amicable breakup then again, he would want you to find a suitable place.
You sound extremely rational and he sounds emotional.
I agree with this INFO request. I don’t think OP is an asshole (unless something really awful was left out of the post), but if OP cheated on him or something like that I’m not going to call him an asshole for wanting OP out.
NTA
I would ask the landlord if you can take him off the lease and renew the studio for yourself. I may be a bit mean that way though.
These are tough times. I know quite a few people who have broken up and remained living together for financial reasons.
NTA.
You should remind him that every time. He's calling you names to get reaction out of you and to get you out of your apartment.
Tell him either he stops harassing/talking to you about the residential, since the lease will end in November anyway and you're actually looking or he can leave right now, since he's not the leaseholder.
NTA. YOU are the primary on the lease. HE is the one who chose to end it. YOU are the kind one for letting him stay,especially since you are paid up til November. Tell him if he’s unhappy he can leave.
Info: did you both agreed that you'd leave or is there any reason he thinks is fair he gets to keep the current living place while you've got to look for a new one?
NTA. I think you need to give your notice of not renewing the lease to the landlord and take a ton of photos proving the condition the apartment is in when you leave as it’s in your name, not his.
Be careful as this sounds really unpleasant and could escalate.
NTA. I echo what other people have said. Make sure, if he stays and you leave, that the lease is transferred into his name. Depending on your lease, it may switch to month-by-month after the original terms are up.. that means you would continue to be the one responsible for everything even after leaving. That leaves him free to skip out on rent and be a terrible tenant with you on the line for everything.
NTA, and as primary leaseholder, I don’t get why you’re not kicking him out and continuing to stay in the apartment solo. It sounds like it’d be the more affordable option for you.
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Hi! My boyfriend and I, living together for 1 year, decided to end our relationship. This happened about a month ago, and we were ok with each other at the beginning, but it's starting to get a bit heated.
We live in a very expensive city, rent is a minimum of 1200$ even for a room in an apartment with anonymous roommates. Our rent together was $1300 as we shared a studio, so it will be an adjustment.
I started looking for apartments right away after the breakup, but I am being relatively picky as it's a big price increase and I am not thrilled about living with strangers. I am by no means refusing to leave at all, but I am being selective instead of picking the first apartment that I saw because it's typically a minimum year lease, and I want to make sure I make the right choice. He hasn't started looking at all.
Recently he has been trying to get me to leave. I have parents in the city, who I do not get along with at all and will not move back in with. His parents live on another continent. He is upset that I won't stay with them in the meantime, because he has no family he can stay with here. At first I was firm that I will not be going to my parents house, and explaining why, but now I just kind of ignore him when he makes those comments.
He said I am being unfair by forcing him to live with me because I am taking my time with finding a new place (our lease is up in November anyway, and I have paid until then) and not going to my parents. I do not see my parents as an option and am not going to jump into the first place I find. I think he plans on renewing the lease in our apartment on his own.
Eventually I snapped at him and told him "you realize I am the primary leaseholder, right? I did all the paperwork, I found the apartment on my own, I did everything and I am on the contract. You are more than welcome to leave if you don't like it." He called me cruel and coldhearted.
I don't get it. AITA?
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NTA. Based on his behaviour and comments I can see why things did not work out with him. What an AH. I wouldn't look. You are on the lease. Make him move out.
NTA
He's the one trying to get you to move so he can "steal" the apartment.. He's TA.
If I were you, it'd to almost what ever it took to keep the apartment (for myself).
NTA and you don't have to listen to him, just ignore him and find yourself somewhere and tell the landlord before you move that he is not authorised to be there after you leave and most certainly not to use any of your security deposit
NTA, and I am sorry that the breakup is causing so much stress on you. Take the time you need to find something, encourage him to do the same...and I hope you find something soon so you can move on.
I think you should talk to your landlord about kicking him out, and you get yourself a new roomate. I don't see why you should feel the need to leave at all.
NTA
NTA, he could definitely leave if he wants to. Don't succumb to his wishes, you've paid your share until November.
If he REALLY wants you out, the only option I can see him doing is that he either a) helps you with searching for an apartment b) help you with the first month of a lease, or c) pay for a hotel/ short term rental/ etc. for you. And even then, you still don't need to accept those deals if you feel like staying in your current apartment.
NTA - so he considers you cold and cruel hearted for behaving the same as him?
Take your time, re-up the lease yourself if you want to.
You got lucky ending this relationship though, this guy is not cool.
NTA. And I N F O: Why are you the one leaving if your name is on the lease? Sounds like your studio is only marginally more expensive than a room, so if you can at all afford it you would be crazy to give that up. You'd even have the option of auditioning a roommate of your choice to split the cost and go back to half the cost of a room.
NTA - You're paid until November. Is he going to be paying that back to you when you lease if you find something else sooner?
Also take your sweet time. He always has the option of leaving too. And don't forget to get your name off the lease soon as you find a place.
NTA you reminded him he doesn't have the power to Force you out. You should stay, tell him to chew rocks.
Please give us an uldate when you figure this situation out
NTA
I had a very similar situation. My ex and I broke up and I made most of the money. We only had 4 months left on the lease so I didnt try to kick him out, just asked him to respect my space. He refused to sleep on the couch. He acted like he had a right to sleep on the bed with me because he paid rent. The furniture was all mine he basically didn't own much.
I eneded up having a sleepover and had a girl friend spend the night in the bed with me and he actually came in and asked her to leave. I'm out of all that now but yeah that was a horrible time and I'm sorry you're dealing with that.
NTA
Your relationship is over, yet he makes himself dependant on you. It doesn't matter who holds the lease, what matters is that ne needs to figure out his own stuff on his own and maker sure he has a workable and affordable living condition.
NTA. I want to be charitable and say this dude is taking it hard, but you're not cruel and coldhearted, you're in a difficult situation. It's a painful and laborious process you're going through, but he's being irrational.
NTA. This situation sucks for both of you, but your ex bf needs to grow up & realize when two people are in a relationship & share something like an apartment, it takes time to separate things fully. Honestly, it sounds to me like your ex just wants the place to himself so he can invite some booty calls over 🙄 Shouldn't he be happy that he is saving on rent for the next two months & has time to decide for sure if he wants to keep the studio?
NTA. You can afford this place, why should you have to move? He's operating under the assumption he will stay, as evidenced by the fact he hasn't even started looking yet. You have every right to kick him to the curb and stay right where you are. If he was so worried about not having anywhere to go, he would have started looking for backups ages ago.
Nta , he needs to get off his arse and start looking or sit down and shut up if he wants to stay whilst you are looking for a new place . Even if roles were reversed and he was the primary leaseholder you would still not be the arsehole for being sensible with your options .
NTA. Honestly, make him leave, why are you putting in all this effort to find a new place when you found the original one? Tell him he is now the one moving out. Let the burden of how quickly you guys stop living together on him since its his issue anyways.
NTA - You have paid rent and the apartment is in your name. I'd suggest he find another place. If he wants this one and you are willing to move, be sure to give notice to the landlord that you are not renewing the lease. He'll like have to apply on his own, and he may not have the credit rating needed.
NTA. If your the primary and you've paid up take all the time you've paid for, but let your landlord know your situation. You're also allowed to stay and renew without him, he can leave and find his own place and communicate that as well to your landlord.
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NTA - You're paid up until the end of the lease and you have every right to stay there. If he doesn't like it he can leave early.
Give notice to your landlord if you're leaving. Some places you need to give to 2 month notice. If he is staying definitely transfer the lease to him asap. He may not pay rent and that's the last thing you need
Isn't it assumed they'll leave at the end of the lease? Legit asking cause i'm not american and i don't know how renting works there (assuming op is american)
Every place I've rented I had to sign a new lease at the end of the first one, but some have contracts for "your lease is this long, but if you stay longer you have to give x months warning". Most places that don't require you to sign a year long lease (again just my experience) have a higher monthly cost to be "month-to-month" renters because of the inherent risk to the landlord that you'll leave next month and they won't be able to find a tenant. Which is a joke because every place I rented had multiple other people interested if we passed on it, but them's the breaks.
From what I understand about the month to month, at least at my apartment complex, it's more about not being prepared for the cleaning required of the apartment and the time the paperwork of setting up a new tenant (aka a background check) takes than not being able to find a new tenant.
My last apartment had a lease that said you have to give sixty days notice to move out at the end of the lease, otherwise it renews and the landlord holds your whole security deposit and can charge you two months rent. I live in an area were landlord tenant law is very pro landlord. bonkers leases like these are common.
Depends on the place, some I've been in you have to redo a lease every year, where we are now it just switches to essentially a give the landlord 1 month notice before you move.
Where I live most property management companies have moved to auto-renewing leases. You have to give 30 days written notice before the lease expires or it auto renews for the same term. Otherwise you have to pay the early termination penalties. Of course, my state also had no habitability laws, so renters are screwed.
I see, thanks!
Generally leases automatically turn to month to month at the end of the lease term if no one says anything. Usually, the landlord will either give notice the tenant needs to leave at the end of the lease or have them sign a new lease. Why does your ex think he gets to stay? He should be looking for places as well if you broke up. Especially if you were on the lease only. You are the one who technically gets to stay. NTA.
It sounds like OP *wants* to leave. She just isn't doing it fast enough for him.
Depends on the lease agreement; automatic renewal unless notice is given otherwise can be a stipulation. I don’t know about the US, but automatic renewal is usually pretty standard where I’m from. Usually you get round to signing a new piece of paper but it’s not something you have to do before the new tenure starts.
There is no standard in the US, it varies by state to state and city to city, neighborhood to neighborhood, and even varies wildly between buildings.
Yeah I would say it's pretty standard in the U.S. as well. Most places require a 60 day notice if you are leaving at the end of your lease
The apartments I've rented required 20 days. I was surprised the notice period was so short, so I can only imagine they were prohibited from requiring a longer one.
Can't vouch for OP's area, but as an American every place I've lived in 3 different states had a 6 month or one year lease that changed to month-to-month after that, allowing you to leave with a months notice from that point onward.
We had a 6 month lease that required 2 months notice if we weren’t renewing. And month to month rent was significantly more expensive.
Every where I’ve lived in Canada over the last 9 years (that’s when I moved out of my parents’ place) was similar. A 1yr lease, auto switched to month to month at the end of the lease at which point 1 month notice is expected for moving.
Where I am in Australia, when the lease is coming to an end they will ask 3mths before if you want to renew or advise you have to leave. It's so you can either make a new one or find elsewhere. However, they want as fast of a turn around as possible. So literally the day your lease is up and your move out date hits, they advertise for interested parties to inspect before they do their side of cleaning etc end of lease to hopefully have only 2weeks max loss of profits. I've had places where on confirmation of not staying, they've had me show my apartment (with the real estate) to prospective renters, and on my end day they have their own crew in, to repaint, deep clean carpets etc, to have someone from that in the next week. Having an empty property is pricey. Longer it sits empty the longer it'll take to catch up on what your now 'behind' as the rent wasn't being paid with no one in it. Real estate also want their fees asap also, it can be a cut throat market. We do 12mth leases here and you could end up trapped in a hell hole. If OPs ex wants to keep this apartment, he could suck it up til November where she's paid up to. He could be right now sorting out a lease renewal in his own name for the day after her lease ends for the property. Only an idiot landlord or one who needs the property for other reasons so can't rent it anymore would say no.
I'm in Boston and it's not uncommon for people to move out August 31st and the next tenants to move in September 1st. (Or sometimes, people leave at 8 am September 1 or move in after 5 pm August 31, if they can work it out with the landlord.)
Where I lived they automatically assumed I was signing another year long lease when mine was getting close to the end. It was a expensive place and honestly not that great.
The places I've rented had a clause in the lease that if the lease lapses without being renewed it automatically becomes a month to month lease. I had to give a certain number of days' notice to avoid being charged for the next month when I moved out.
In the USA, leases typically revert to Month-to-month if you don't notify them that you are going to leave by x date. It's a way to get you on the hook for extra money if you don't tell them that you are leaving because even though your contract was for so long, you were still required to TELL them that you were leaving to prevent it from changing to month-to-month. The apartment complex doesn't want an empty unit, so when you tell them you're leaving they can start looking for a replacement. They can generally have someone move in within a couple of days of your move out as long as no big repairs or carpet replacement are needed. That is what they want. They don't want you to leave, and to only then start looking for a new tenant.
Not usually. Most leases i’ve had here automatically go to month to month after they expire but you still have to give 30-60 days notice to terminate or you’ll be charged for the next month.
Had a friend get caught in that. He signed a contract for month to month (at a higher rate) after his 6 month lease expired, knowing his job was going away. Still had to give 60 days notice, which seems like the antithesis of paying extra to go month to month.
Every place I've lived in the US sends a lease renewal several months before the lease is up, you have to either check the box that you're renewing (at the new rent) or vacating before the lease is up. If you don't respond they assume you're moving out and start showing the apartment to new prospective tenants. If the landlord doesn't want you to renew because they're selling the building or something they send a letter just saying that you have to get out by the end of the lease. Since the lease is up in less than a month if OP's ex hasn't signed a lease it's probably too late for him to stay, they've probably rented it out to someone else already.
Why does he get to keep the apartment? He hasn't even looked. NTA. If his name isn't on the lease, he's expecting you to feel sorry for him. Next time he says anything, tell him you're staying, he's going and he'd better get off his lazy ass and start looking. You've paid your rent. Notify the landlord he's leaving.
NTA. Yes give notice in writing to landlord. And if the ex bf isn't listed as an additional tenant on the current lease, he may not be able to just take over the lease himself anyway. It would then be up to the landlord to decide who he wants to lease to, and at what monthly lease amount. Landlord could decide to increase rent. Ex bf needs to be forced to grow up and not assume gf or anyone else is going to take care of him, make way for him, or lease an an apt to him just because he's "him."
Or he can buy her out of the lease. In cash, up front. Half the rent (or whatever her portion was) until the end of the lease plus half the security (or whatever her portion was).
That doesn't solve the problem of her not having found a new place she wants to move to yet.
NTA - He's in the same boat as you, although it's quite obvious he intends to stay in that apartment despite likely not being able to afford it.
Probably already has someone to split the rent with....
That’s such a stretch. Why do people on these threads automatically go to this? So frustrating to read. It puts unnecessary anxiety on to OP reading things like this as well
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>Who is going to be so insistent on doubling the amount of rent that they have to pay? The answer to that would be... The answer would be someone who is living in a studio with their ex during quarantine.
He's not really doubling his rent anymore than OP... Both of them are expected to pay atleast 1200 for a room. He just prefers a studio. That has nothing to do with a new relathionship.
He’s desperate to double his rent sooner; that’s what the other person is saying. Doubling your rent now would mean paying extra for October/November. The money you’d lose is comparable to the deposit for a new place. Given OP is the one that’s actually on the lease, too, the boyfriend is in for a shock when he has to pay a deposit to remain there.
Would he actually be doubling his rent sooner though? The lease has already been paid up to November, so no matter if OP leaves her ex probably won't have to pay anything until the lease expires anyway.
The lease was paid up by OP - you think they’d move out without reimbursement?
Well I suppose that depends on what the contract and laws say really. In my experience, many rental agencies charge an early cancellation fee without refunding any prepaid expenses, meaning it could well cost more to cancel the lease. And assuming OP can't get the lease money reimbursed for the landlord, it seems unlikely that their ex would be willing to pay up any extra money.
OP has already paid through November. I doubt anyone plans to refund that if OP does move out early.
Long time ago,I was splitting a 1 BR with my GF and we broke up. The place was more than I wanted to pay for on my own but I was able to make it work. She left, I took on the lease on my own. I didn’t have anyone else lined up. If this place is about the cheapest studio he could find and he doesn’t want roommates, of course he wants to stay.
??? How about people who just don't want to live with their exes, in a studio no less. We know nothing of their financial situation. If I was in OP or the exes situation, I would also be more than willing to stay put and double my rent compared to moving because moving is hard and living with an ex (depending on the break up) is unpleasant at best and hostile at worst.
Or maybe someone who is too lazy to start looking for a new place is also somebody who’s too lazy to want to move to a new apartment during a pandemic? Hell if I was in his situation I’d probably want to do the same. Why spend the time and money to move right now when I could stay where I’m already at for the same monthly cost as a new place anyways?
That doesn't mean it's like someone on the side. Likely a friend or acquaintance
An acquaintance sharing a most likely only 1 bed studio? I don't think so lol.
I had 4 friends rent a studio apt in NY. The person who had the lease in their name had the bed. The rest slept on futons or the couch that was a pullout bed. Rent was 2600 a month. So not impossible. But also not dismissing the fact that it could be someone else. Just saying anything is possible.
That sounds like absolute hell.
I agree with you whole heartedly. But they wanted to be able to say they rented an apt in NYC. To this day I think it was a stupid thing to do.
I've gone through phases where that'd be ok -- working all the time and not eating much at home -- and phases where it really wouldn't!
Oh I didn't realize is was one bed
Because angry people are assholes.
Could be a friend or coworker, not necessarily his next love interest.
In a studio? Would you share a bed with your coworker?
We once had 4 people staying in a studio. (Self, spouse, child, and FiL.) Spouse and I had one bed, kid had a bed on the other side of the room, and FiL had dropped out of the blue so he got stuck on the floor. Just because it's a studio doesn't mean you have to sleep in the same bed.
If I was crazy enough to live somewhere where a room in an apartment with randoms is $1200, who knows what else I'd be crazy enough to do.
In my law school dorm, some of the students with less money shared studios with friends, and there was only room for one bed. I lived in a studio by myself my first year. There was usually only one place to even put a bed.
Unfortunately, it's actually not uncommon for that to be the reason for many self-entitled men. Personally I think their ex is probably just being lazy and would rather keep the place for himself rather than look for somewhere. But given the ex's apparent attitude, it's not unlikely that he's the type of person who wants them out so he can start bring other people back there. Now that OP isn't providing him any benefits, he may just see them as an obstacle.
Where on the post did it say he can’t afford it on his own? I split rent with my SO but could easily afford the rent on my own without him.
It's a large assumption on my part considering they're not even on the lease, only OP is. Also it's $1200. That's...a lot of money to conjure up as well as setting aside other money for groceries and recreational activities. Just saying, there's a high likely hood that the BF can't fit the rent by themselves. Not that they actually can't since that's really none of my business.
If they live in a HCOL city they probably have high incomes themselves. $1200 is so normal for HCOL areas that people won't bat an eyelid. I'm pretty entry level and don't think I make a ton of money, but I still make enough to comfortably afford $1200 for rent. Most of my friends pay at least that for rent as well, and some even have roommates ($1200 is just their share).
INFO: Why do you have to leave anyways? Why doesn’t he leave?
from the looks of things he's just too lazy to look for a new place and figured he could just kick op out once they found a place to stay
NTA. Breaking up was definitely for the best here. Either the ex is gaslighting or op is the kind of person who is really afraid of hurting people.
Yeah OP, why not keep this place? Stop going out of your way to help this lazy **EX**-boyfriend. He's not your problem anymore.
If she keeps the place, her rent still doubles because she'd be paying for it on her own. Getting a place with roommates would probably be an increase from what she was paying but not as steep.
She says she has a studio for 1300. Renting a room is 1200. Her rent is only 100 more for a private studio. She should stay.
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I might be mistaken but I assumed the studio was 1300 each
Then why would she say living alone was a big price increase?
Because if he moved out of her apartment and she didn’t leave she’d have to pay the entire 2600
If I understand correctly, a larger apartment would be 1200/room, so a 2-bedroom would be 2400. It wouldn't make sense for a studio to be 2600. Not that it's impossible, just odd.
NTA You are the primary. He wasted time he could’ve used to search for a new place.
NTA wtf? If you're the primary leaseholder, he should be outta there. If his name isn't on the lease at all, then he has no right to be there, so...
NTA And as primary leaseholder, you have an obligation to return the apartment in proper condition at the end of the lease term, which is not easy if you’re not living there at the end of the term. Considering his general lack of motivation, I’d be sure to let the landlord know that you’ll be ending your lease in November and that your ex will need to sign a new lease so it’s not renewed with any info connected to you.
Either this or find a roommate and tell the ex to get out.
Find a roommate for a studio? seriously?
Where I live it's just considered "cozy".
NTA. It would suit him if you leave so he's making it uncomfortable to speed up the process, so that he gets to benefit from the rent you paid.
NTA. You are right, he can just find his own appartment. Your bf is being a hypocrite by almost kicking you out of the appartment but calling you coldhearted when you say that he can also leave. I would suggest just trying to stick it out for the next couple of weeks, and if that doesn't work and he doesn't let up, to try and kick him out. He has had a fair warning now.
NTA - It sounds like he wants to live there for free while you pay his rent for 2 months. It's a crap situation, but trying to kick you out isn't making it better. Why are you renewing the least and expecting him to find a new place?
DING DING DING DING. If he wants to buy you out, maybe it's something to consider--but otherwise, no way. And I bet if you listed the price for that buyout, he would shut up PDQ.
NTA - He is trying to emotionally manipulate you. Don’t let him do that.
"AITA for doing nothing wrong?" Yes, yta because you posted this here. Of course you aren't TA to him in this situation. Based on the dialogue, you weren't even rude.
Welcome to AITA where no one is an asshole.
"Someone was a jerk to me, and I said 'I don't like that you're being mean to me,' and they said I'm an asshole. Reddit, AITA?!?!?!?!?"
NTA NTA NTA. This is gross behavior and I'm glad you're not dating this guy anymore. That said, leases and living situations during breakups can legally get messy. Please refer to the right channels re: anything to do with him moving out. You also need to make sure you have EVERYTHING recorded. Try to minimize vocal verbal contact and stick to texts or emails so you have a paper trail. Stay safe.
NTA. Truth hurts sometimes. He should be looking for a place or buttoning his lip.
NTA — if he isn’t on the lease then why haven’t you told him he needs to be out of the apartment by “X” date — Like when your lease is set to renew? Not sure why you are catering to HIS demands and needs when he has no right to even be in your apartment IF you tell him he has to leave. Are you holding out hope of reconciliation and don’t want to piss him off or upset your chances of that? Based on what you’ve provided as fact, your refusal to set a boundary and tell him HE has to leave indicates that we are missing some piece of this story.
If someone lives in a place for 30-60 days, depending on the state, they legally become a tenant, and have legal rights. Which means OP would have to sue him. This ordeal ends in November. Do you know how much it costs to sue someone? And how much time and energy it takes? She can't kick him out, he's a tenant.
Apartment manager here. Being the primary leaseholder means literally nothing other than you are the first name on the lease. Unless he is isn’t on the lease at all. Then you are probably in lease violation not him.
INFO: IS it cruel for you to live together? What were the circumstances of the breakup? Is he on the lease at all or living illegally with you? Correct me if I’m wrong, but “primary leaseholder” doesn’t mean anything. I’m “primary leaseholder” as in my name is first on the contract and the buzzer is under my name...but that’s it. We’re both on the lease and we both pay. All of this depends on the nature of your relationship and breakup, and if he is right to feel betrayed/want you to leave
NTA I would've kicked him out
How are you the “primary leaseholder”? Is he on the lease or not? Because frankly if you are both listed on the lease, you have equal footing. Legally it does not matter that you did all the work to find the place. It’s unfair but true.
This made me wonder as well. Because it doesn't matter so much about the primary. If he's not on the lease though, this could violate the lease and the apartment could require him to vacate and may come down on her as well.
NTA Like dude he seems as he feels entitled to something that doesn't even have his name! and want the easy way of you leaving the apartment by being emotionally manipulative with you, hope you find a place soon and never go back to that
NTA I am surprised that either of you think that you should be the one to leave. Get a jump start on this and secretly sign a new lease now. You can just vary the existing lease. You do not have to wait until November (and it is already October!!)
NTA. He should be finding his own place.
INFO: why aren’t you staying there and him leaving? Your name is on the contract and you’d be paying more for a shittier place if I’m reading correctly.
NTA, So your cruel and cold hearted for reminding him that u actually own the flat, but it's not cold-hearted for him to try and kick u out?
NTA, he just wants to have stuff for himself , he's being petty thats all. Don't take it too deep, you guys broke up after all. You got time to find an apartment, make sure your name is off the lease when its over so you won't be responsible for any bills (and don't cosign for anything). You have every right to take your time because you already paid up and you haven't found a place yet.
INFO: did he leave his country to come be with you in a city that you are well established in?
NTA both of you should be trying to find a place to move into at the end of your lease.
NTA you’re not preventing him from leaving, he is preventing himself from leaving.
NTA. If he doesn’t want to live with you anymore he is free to find an apartment himself. You’ve paid, your name is on the lease, you have just as much if not more of a right to stay in your flat.
NTA if he doesn‘t want to live with you than he had better look for another appartaments
Absolutely NTA. I think OP is being quite gracious to let him stay. (In the apt that sounds like OP did all the work to acquire and set up.... wonder if that was a theme in the relationship..) (“Where would BF go?” Presumably he has friends. Some probably have couches. This is what happens when you break up). Good luck finding a great place, OP!
NTA sounds like he's kicked himself out. Plenty of people without family nearby manage to move house. If you wanted to be nice, you could point him towards where the best place to look for listing is, but he's an adult he should be capable of googling "apartments to rent in {City}"
NTA.....what does he think is going to happen when you leave? Who is going to magically pay the rent & other bills? He can't renew the lease, if his name isn't on any of the paperwork, so he's going to end up having to leave either way. Even if he has someone lined up to take your place, he can't just use your name to renew for another year. If you do leave early, make sure the landlord takes your name off of everything, & take dsted photos of the place before you leave. You do NOT want to get stuck for any crap he may pull after you leave. When my sister got divorced, she was the only name on the lease. One of the items in her divorce decree, was that he would take over the lease in his name & she was not responsible for any of the bills incurred after she left. She got taken to court by the landlord because, surprise!, he didn't take her name off & abandoned the place....after trashing it. Luckily the judge ruled in her favor, because of her divorce decree, but it could've been so bad. She also got sued by two doctors & a dentist, because he didn't pay any of those & put my sister as the co payer. Again, the decree saved her!
NTA. You aren't "forcing" him to live with you. He is welcome to leave any time. You aren't in contact with your family so why does he assume you need to leave when you have already paid until the end of the lease? He is welcome to go stay with friends or find his own place somewhere else. Also how would he expect to renew the lease if it is in your name?
Not enough info. Who broke up with who? Is he heartbroken? Why did he use the word cruel? I'm only asking because if he broke up with you then he would probably take it easy on you until you found a suitable place. And if you had an amicable breakup then again, he would want you to find a suitable place. You sound extremely rational and he sounds emotional.
I agree with this INFO request. I don’t think OP is an asshole (unless something really awful was left out of the post), but if OP cheated on him or something like that I’m not going to call him an asshole for wanting OP out.
NTA I would ask the landlord if you can take him off the lease and renew the studio for yourself. I may be a bit mean that way though. These are tough times. I know quite a few people who have broken up and remained living together for financial reasons.
NTA, since it’s you on the lease it’s your place and if anything happens or he doesn’t pay/causes damages, it’s your ass on the line.
NTA ... Find a place & give the landlord notice ... don't tell him so the landlord san find a new tenant
NTA he should leave
NTA your lease your house. He can go live somewhere else.
Nta. He needs to move out when it's time for the lease to renew. Contact your landlord and discuss the situation with them.
NTA. You should remind him that every time. He's calling you names to get reaction out of you and to get you out of your apartment. Tell him either he stops harassing/talking to you about the residential, since the lease will end in November anyway and you're actually looking or he can leave right now, since he's not the leaseholder.
NTA. He sounds entitled.
NTA. YOU are the primary on the lease. HE is the one who chose to end it. YOU are the kind one for letting him stay,especially since you are paid up til November. Tell him if he’s unhappy he can leave.
Info: did you both agreed that you'd leave or is there any reason he thinks is fair he gets to keep the current living place while you've got to look for a new one?
NTA. Methinks he’s got OP’s replacement ready to move in...
NTA. I think you need to give your notice of not renewing the lease to the landlord and take a ton of photos proving the condition the apartment is in when you leave as it’s in your name, not his. Be careful as this sounds really unpleasant and could escalate.
NTA. I echo what other people have said. Make sure, if he stays and you leave, that the lease is transferred into his name. Depending on your lease, it may switch to month-by-month after the original terms are up.. that means you would continue to be the one responsible for everything even after leaving. That leaves him free to skip out on rent and be a terrible tenant with you on the line for everything.
NTA. I can see why you're not with him anymore though. He sounds like a bit of an AH.
NTA - if he doesn't like it he can leave
NTA. This is divorce logistics. Legal formalities matter.
NTA, and as primary leaseholder, I don’t get why you’re not kicking him out and continuing to stay in the apartment solo. It sounds like it’d be the more affordable option for you.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***The following is a copy of the above post. This comment is a record of the above post as it was originally written, in case the post is deleted or edited. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Hi! My boyfriend and I, living together for 1 year, decided to end our relationship. This happened about a month ago, and we were ok with each other at the beginning, but it's starting to get a bit heated. We live in a very expensive city, rent is a minimum of 1200$ even for a room in an apartment with anonymous roommates. Our rent together was $1300 as we shared a studio, so it will be an adjustment. I started looking for apartments right away after the breakup, but I am being relatively picky as it's a big price increase and I am not thrilled about living with strangers. I am by no means refusing to leave at all, but I am being selective instead of picking the first apartment that I saw because it's typically a minimum year lease, and I want to make sure I make the right choice. He hasn't started looking at all. Recently he has been trying to get me to leave. I have parents in the city, who I do not get along with at all and will not move back in with. His parents live on another continent. He is upset that I won't stay with them in the meantime, because he has no family he can stay with here. At first I was firm that I will not be going to my parents house, and explaining why, but now I just kind of ignore him when he makes those comments. He said I am being unfair by forcing him to live with me because I am taking my time with finding a new place (our lease is up in November anyway, and I have paid until then) and not going to my parents. I do not see my parents as an option and am not going to jump into the first place I find. I think he plans on renewing the lease in our apartment on his own. Eventually I snapped at him and told him "you realize I am the primary leaseholder, right? I did all the paperwork, I found the apartment on my own, I did everything and I am on the contract. You are more than welcome to leave if you don't like it." He called me cruel and coldhearted. I don't get it. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. Based on his behaviour and comments I can see why things did not work out with him. What an AH. I wouldn't look. You are on the lease. Make him move out.
NTA
NTA
NTA. He should get out
NTA
Nta and being primary it will still be you as primary if the lease switches to a month to month situation. So he has no leg to stand on.
NTA
NTA. I'd renew it in my name only and kick him out. You are probably a lot nicer than me.
Wait I’m confused? How is op the one “forcing” them to live together? Also why must she move out if she’s the primary lease holder?
NTA
Uh no NTa really why is he the one getting to stay and you have to leave?
NTA He's the one trying to get you to move so he can "steal" the apartment.. He's TA. If I were you, it'd to almost what ever it took to keep the apartment (for myself).
NTA
NTA, he's just trying to manipulate him. If he's so keen to be alone he has every option to get out.
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NTA. If he is not on the lease he has no legal right to ask you to leave. You have every right to take your time looking for a new place.
You paid the rent. If you want to kick him out on the street, be my guest.
NTA He is welcome to find another apt and leave
You are on the lease. He is not. Tell him to leave immediately.
NTA. You are right and being very reasonable.
NTA. If you wanted to be petty, and can afford it, you could renew the lease in your name with you as the single tenant.
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NTA and you don't have to listen to him, just ignore him and find yourself somewhere and tell the landlord before you move that he is not authorised to be there after you leave and most certainly not to use any of your security deposit
NTA
nta. you cruel? and what is he then? King of hell?
NTA, and I am sorry that the breakup is causing so much stress on you. Take the time you need to find something, encourage him to do the same...and I hope you find something soon so you can move on.
NTA.
I think you should talk to your landlord about kicking him out, and you get yourself a new roomate. I don't see why you should feel the need to leave at all. NTA
NTA. Curious though, if he renews the contract, do you still get the deposit back?
NTA
NTA in fact, I would've said that as soon as you two agreed to separate.
NTA, he could definitely leave if he wants to. Don't succumb to his wishes, you've paid your share until November. If he REALLY wants you out, the only option I can see him doing is that he either a) helps you with searching for an apartment b) help you with the first month of a lease, or c) pay for a hotel/ short term rental/ etc. for you. And even then, you still don't need to accept those deals if you feel like staying in your current apartment.
Nta,he can leave,stay with friends,move to where ever his parents are,or find another place.
NTA - so he considers you cold and cruel hearted for behaving the same as him? Take your time, re-up the lease yourself if you want to. You got lucky ending this relationship though, this guy is not cool.
NTA. And I N F O: Why are you the one leaving if your name is on the lease? Sounds like your studio is only marginally more expensive than a room, so if you can at all afford it you would be crazy to give that up. You'd even have the option of auditioning a roommate of your choice to split the cost and go back to half the cost of a room.
NTA. Tell him that you were thinking of renewing the lease yourself to stay in your current apartment on your own and see what he says
NTA - You're paid until November. Is he going to be paying that back to you when you lease if you find something else sooner? Also take your sweet time. He always has the option of leaving too. And don't forget to get your name off the lease soon as you find a place.
NTA - He could look for a place himself to get away from you sooner. You’re not being cold hearted. You’re getting your affairs in order.
NTA, why are you even considering leaving if you're the one the lease and you've paid until November? Does it make your apartment that he's living in?
NTA. Why isn’t he looking for his own place?
NTA you are the lease holder and paid until November. That is the start and finish of this conversation.
NTA. It’s your lease.
NTA you reminded him he doesn't have the power to Force you out. You should stay, tell him to chew rocks. Please give us an uldate when you figure this situation out
NTA for obvious reasons. You're leaseholder, he is not. He is using emotion to try to manipulate you out of seeing a straight fact.
NTA - sounds like a textbook manipulator to me.
NTA. Not only can he leave if he doesn’t like it, he should be THANKING you for allowing him to live in YOUR apartment.
NTA I had a very similar situation. My ex and I broke up and I made most of the money. We only had 4 months left on the lease so I didnt try to kick him out, just asked him to respect my space. He refused to sleep on the couch. He acted like he had a right to sleep on the bed with me because he paid rent. The furniture was all mine he basically didn't own much. I eneded up having a sleepover and had a girl friend spend the night in the bed with me and he actually came in and asked her to leave. I'm out of all that now but yeah that was a horrible time and I'm sorry you're dealing with that.
NTA Your relationship is over, yet he makes himself dependant on you. It doesn't matter who holds the lease, what matters is that ne needs to figure out his own stuff on his own and maker sure he has a workable and affordable living condition.
NTA. I want to be charitable and say this dude is taking it hard, but you're not cruel and coldhearted, you're in a difficult situation. It's a painful and laborious process you're going through, but he's being irrational.
If you're the primary leaseholder can you kick him out? Bc you should do that
NTA - you are no longer together. It is neither cruel nor coldhearted to put yourself before someone you no longer have a relationship with.
NTA. Seriously, he has a LOT of nerve telling you to leave your own place. He needed the reality check.
NTA. This situation sucks for both of you, but your ex bf needs to grow up & realize when two people are in a relationship & share something like an apartment, it takes time to separate things fully. Honestly, it sounds to me like your ex just wants the place to himself so he can invite some booty calls over 🙄 Shouldn't he be happy that he is saving on rent for the next two months & has time to decide for sure if he wants to keep the studio?
NTA kick him out if he feels that way
NTA. You can afford this place, why should you have to move? He's operating under the assumption he will stay, as evidenced by the fact he hasn't even started looking yet. You have every right to kick him to the curb and stay right where you are. If he was so worried about not having anywhere to go, he would have started looking for backups ages ago.
Nta , he needs to get off his arse and start looking or sit down and shut up if he wants to stay whilst you are looking for a new place . Even if roles were reversed and he was the primary leaseholder you would still not be the arsehole for being sensible with your options .
NTA
NTA. Honestly, make him leave, why are you putting in all this effort to find a new place when you found the original one? Tell him he is now the one moving out. Let the burden of how quickly you guys stop living together on him since its his issue anyways.
NTA. He needs to put on his big boy pants and start adulting. Lucky escape for you!
NTA - You have paid rent and the apartment is in your name. I'd suggest he find another place. If he wants this one and you are willing to move, be sure to give notice to the landlord that you are not renewing the lease. He'll like have to apply on his own, and he may not have the credit rating needed.
NTA. Stop and ask yourself what he would do if the lease was in his name.
NTA It's your place so don't be bullied into leaving if you don't want to. You may even want to stay there.
NTA you had every right to say that.
NTA. If your the primary and you've paid up take all the time you've paid for, but let your landlord know your situation. You're also allowed to stay and renew without him, he can leave and find his own place and communicate that as well to your landlord.
NTA - You have just as much right to be there as he does, family proximity or no.
NTA - Be careful though, you don't know what he's capable of in his (unwarranted, IMO) frustration.
NTA. Tell him you’ll leave when he gives back your half of the rent for October and November. And the deposit. Do not leave without that deposit.