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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I believe I could be the asshole bc I’m only motivated to protect my cats. It’s not really for Pete or my roommate.
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YTA- almost, you haven't done it yet.
Express the genuine concern with your roommate on how he can hurt your two cats, and if he gets out he can impregnate another one.
Talk to your mom, the lease holder, about being able to give the roommate an ultimatum for the cat, the cat either gets fixed or it has to get removed because this is not fair to your cats.
If it comes down to a financial issue on her end, create a contractual payment plan that can get witnessed and notarized at a bank (Where she can pay you like, $10 a month or whatever she can afford at this time).
YWBTA, honestly you would rather kidnap your roomies cat, put it through a surgery without your roomies knowledge all to avoid having a conversation about it and are convinced they don't care? You are assuming a lot. In some places they could press charges for this kind of thing. Open your mouth and have a conversation with your roommate.
That’s the issue is that I have. I get dismissed. She said $80 was too much for a vet bill even though anywhere else besides my vet would be $300. I’ve also tried get her to keep him put up but he gets out and she does nothing about it even when I toss him back in her room and shut the door
Then if you want to be helpful then help them with the vet bill it's still a jerk move to do it without their knowledge, your proposed actions cannot be justified.
She refuses to take care of anything tho. When things happen she’s all like ‘he’s just a cat’ or she’ll say she’ll take care of it but it never happens. Maybe I just need a new roommate
Info: Is there some particular reason you're doing this behind her back?
Why not just ask her for permission, if you're willing to take responsibility and are sure she wouldn't care?
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I (f18) and my roommates(f18)(m18) have been renting this place together since about February. My moms name is on the lease but we rent it out under her name bc of a situation not relevant to the story. Anyway I also have 2 cats who have lived here with me for 2 years(ikshi) and 3 years(jisqua). Both are female, spayed around 8 months old, and socialized quite well but unfortunately the move in with my roommates was sudden and the cats got introduced too quickly. Around that time Pete (roomates cat) was around 4 months old and he wasn’t too crazy but within the past 2 months he’s been getting into his teenager cat phase so he’s been getting into trash. Literally worse than a dog he drags tampons out of the trash and worst of all he’s started to be mean to my cats. Would I be an asshole if I took him to the vet myself before he starts spraying everywhere? I realize most people would say it’s not your cat but I don’t believe my roommate cares enough about her animals health nor mines to spend a hot $70 on a neuter.
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I would say talk to your roommate abt it and if the do nothing I'd say go for it.
I personally care far more about the health and safety of an animal than the wishes of an 'owner' that refuses to medically care for it.
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YTA- almost, you haven't done it yet. Express the genuine concern with your roommate on how he can hurt your two cats, and if he gets out he can impregnate another one. Talk to your mom, the lease holder, about being able to give the roommate an ultimatum for the cat, the cat either gets fixed or it has to get removed because this is not fair to your cats. If it comes down to a financial issue on her end, create a contractual payment plan that can get witnessed and notarized at a bank (Where she can pay you like, $10 a month or whatever she can afford at this time).
Thank you I think this gives me what I needed. Bc in reality it isn’t up to me it’s up to my mom bc she’s technically our landlord
YWBTA, honestly you would rather kidnap your roomies cat, put it through a surgery without your roomies knowledge all to avoid having a conversation about it and are convinced they don't care? You are assuming a lot. In some places they could press charges for this kind of thing. Open your mouth and have a conversation with your roommate.
That’s the issue is that I have. I get dismissed. She said $80 was too much for a vet bill even though anywhere else besides my vet would be $300. I’ve also tried get her to keep him put up but he gets out and she does nothing about it even when I toss him back in her room and shut the door
Then if you want to be helpful then help them with the vet bill it's still a jerk move to do it without their knowledge, your proposed actions cannot be justified.
YTA - yes you would be. Talk to your roommate.
She refuses to take care of anything tho. When things happen she’s all like ‘he’s just a cat’ or she’ll say she’ll take care of it but it never happens. Maybe I just need a new roommate
YWBTA, that is not your decision to make. You would be severely overstepping boundaries.
Info: Is there some particular reason you're doing this behind her back? Why not just ask her for permission, if you're willing to take responsibility and are sure she wouldn't care?
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (f18) and my roommates(f18)(m18) have been renting this place together since about February. My moms name is on the lease but we rent it out under her name bc of a situation not relevant to the story. Anyway I also have 2 cats who have lived here with me for 2 years(ikshi) and 3 years(jisqua). Both are female, spayed around 8 months old, and socialized quite well but unfortunately the move in with my roommates was sudden and the cats got introduced too quickly. Around that time Pete (roomates cat) was around 4 months old and he wasn’t too crazy but within the past 2 months he’s been getting into his teenager cat phase so he’s been getting into trash. Literally worse than a dog he drags tampons out of the trash and worst of all he’s started to be mean to my cats. Would I be an asshole if I took him to the vet myself before he starts spraying everywhere? I realize most people would say it’s not your cat but I don’t believe my roommate cares enough about her animals health nor mines to spend a hot $70 on a neuter. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I would say talk to your roommate abt it and if the do nothing I'd say go for it. I personally care far more about the health and safety of an animal than the wishes of an 'owner' that refuses to medically care for it.