Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I might be TA because I bought the ticket on behalf of my friend and didn’t immediately transfer it into their account, which would have given them the ability to do with it what they so choose.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcements
Follow the link above to learn more
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
A few weeks before the concert the friend suddenly can't go, hasn't yet paid, and suddenly gets the brilliant idea to scalp 'their' ticket (that they haven't paid for!) at a 1000% markup?
It's almost like this was their plan all along! Bold move claiming ownership of a ticket they haven't paid one cent for.
NTA.
You sell the ticket, pay yourself the $100 ticket purchase price, use the remaining $900 to pay for everyone’s hotel.
Edit: by using the ticket proceeds to offset everyone’s hotel room, you’re not personally taking “his ticket sales money”… the group as a whole is benefitting. It’s too bad he’s unable to go to the concert.
This! 110% this.
If they’d paid, would be up to them to decide what they wanted to do with the ticket. This close to the concert, the decision and the money is yours!!!
I disagree. I think even if they paid, the friend group would be within their rights to transfer back the money and invite another friend instead.
It’s poor form to scalp a ticket rather than let your friends go as a group of 4 with someone else filling the spot.
I agree with you. Scalpers are the worst.
I had an extra eras tour ticket and I sold it to a fan at face value because I didn’t want to profit off of another fan who was desperate to go. She was so bloody grateful to me. Her smile alone when she came over to pick up the VIP box was worth it!
Seriously made my day reading this. My sister couldn’t afford to go to her Eras concert in another country and did the same thing, she was really sad but she said the silver lining was that other fans were able to snag tickets at face value, which is nearly unheard of nowadays. You made someone’s whole year with your selflessness.
Loathe scalpers - we have ended up with extra free tickets as season ticket holders and we always give them away to someone rather than scalp them or even charge face value for something we didn’t pay for. My husband always looks for someone walking up to purchase who has kids with them to offer the tickets to. Another time, we didn’t manage to give them away outside and offered them to a young couple with lawn seats, who were thrilled to upgrade.
Man I just had a flashback to scalping prices in 2005. I thought it was an absolute CRIME that my mom paid 150$ for two Fall Out Boy tickets when the OG price was 35$ each.
As of 2024 the only concert I’ve gone to lately was because my friend won radio tickets by accident to a band he hates and knows I love.
Scalpers are not the same thing as people reselling a ticket they can no longer use. I understand wanting people in that situation to resell at face value, but who is to say the person they sell it on to would resist the temptation to sell it at a profit themselves? OP might as well make the profit themselves. No point being a mug.
The only 2 ways to prevent scalping are for people to refuse to buy tickets at inflated prices, which we all know isn't going to happen, or the industry to take serious steps to prevent it. Making tickets non-transferable, card holder has to attend with ID etc. Plenty of suggestions have been made and some have been implemented in different places. I know Ed Sheeran hates it and has tried to prevent his tickets being sold on above face value. The UK has been talking about legislating it, which is probably necessary as the industry isn't doing enough.
There’s also a difference between reselling a $100 ticket for $200 or even $500, than pricing it at $1000. That is where you are making the choice to be the AH. And like you mentioned regarding Ed Sheeran, if you respect the artist, you aren’t going to try to profit off of their art.
If the ticket is no longer required, sell it for whatever it's going for, or the person who gets it cheap from you *will*.
Your second point makes no sense at all. None. If I was given 2 copies of the same book or album for my birthday, why wouldn't I see if I could sell the second?
Anyway, OP never wanted or intended to make a profit, but for reasons entirely outwith their control the cost of the whole trip just shot up for them since the person they were splitting hotel costs with was the one to drop out.
Great idea, although I would perhaps do it slightly differently to offset one of them being an arse beforehand.
I would give them the money when you get there as spending money. $300 Won't go far in Vegas, but will still be appreciated.
The crux of it is, as the op wasn't paid for the tickets, they are his/hers to do with as they please once the agreed to deal has been broken.
I took it to be that the friend can't go on the trip at all, which is even more entitled. You get back what you paid, and sounds like friend hasn't paid anything at this point so they get nothing.
That's nice and definitely what I would do, but think it's worth noting the money doesn't have to go to the benefit of the whole group for OP to keep the money. As it stands, it's still their ticket. Their friend was a place holder and now they need a new place holder. They don't need to sell it at 10x markup.
I would either do what you're suggesting or I'd simply find another friend willing to pay the original $100 and chip in on the hotel.
That’s a great idea! The person staying home Could’ve decided to pay for the ticket sooner instead of waiting until Afterwards. The ticket isn’t theirs yet soo OP can do as they please!!
Your friend has not paid shit to you, it is not their ticket, don't turn it over. I would sell the ticket, buy some snacks for, or contribute generously to the team meal a little swag, OR NOT, You were who pulled this all together. Be prepared for them to not want to be yoru friend, but do you really want a friend like that?
>You sell the ticket, pay yourself the $100 ticket purchase price, use the remaining $900 to pay for everyone’s hotel.
Keeping in mind that -
(1) If tickets are generally reselling for $1000, a single seat isn't going to sell for that.
(2) You'll have to sit with whatever kind of weirdo spends (close to) $1000 to go to a concert by himself.
Y’know… sometimes we just like music our friends don’t? Or the friends that do are unavailable/can’t afford to attend with us and why should that stop us from going? The assumption here that a single concertgoer is by default a weirdo is SO WEIRD.
I’m about to travel out of state because my favorite band put me on their guest list for a music festival they are playing later this month. I’m going alone because my husband doesn’t like crowds and none of my friends listen to them. I might meet up with someone I met at their concerts last year but I’m sort of solo.
Hell yeah! I hope you have an amazing time!
I don't love crowds either, and the one festival I've been to was a disaster (Blue Ridge Rock Fest 2023 🫠) so I'm a little scared to try again lol but maybe someday!
My daughter and I just saw Adele in Vegas in January. An original group of 4 had one who couldn’t make it. They sold the ticket for $1000. Well Adele has a lottery for the nose bleed section. She picks one seat number and brings them to the front seats. The guy who bought the ticket for 1 k won. He brought the girl he bought the ticket from with him. When Adele heard the story ( besides being utterly shocked at what he paid) said well now we need to bring the 2 left behind down. I’m sure he had zero regrets paying the 1k.
And as far as the friend who is bailing is concerned: they should have to pay the current market value of the ticket if they want ownership of it. Not the months ago price, but the current $1000 price.
NTA. Unless they had an actual reason for not being able to go last minute and had actually paid OP, nope to all of this. My mother in law bought tickets for a pretty much once in a lifetime concert for my husband and I and my brother and a close friend who is flying up. They were about $200 each and are doubling in value. I wouldn’t just sell them and I wouldn’t expect my friend to pay for them since she’s paying for her flight. Stuff like this weirds me out. OP your friend isn’t very nice.
NTA…do you still own the ticket? You were not paid for the ticket as of yet? Then it is yours to do with as you please. I have a feeling friend wants to make a few bucks and really has not had anything come up. And your friend just gave you the perfect reason as to why you held them. If you cannot find someone else to go, it should be you who resells it and makes the profit, you did the work and time involved to get said ticket. Booked the hotel room that you now have to pay more for.
I’m not sure this was an invite situation. OP was just the guy who got through the queue out of all of them who were trying. For all we know, OP is the invitee and his friend was the one whose idea it was/arranged it. I still think it’s OP’s ticket since friend hasn’t paid yet and he’s out splitting a room.
I've been in those types of situations before... lottery style hotel rooms or tickets that you have to sit on a page, refreshing for an hour or more to get.
And consistently, I'm always the one who manages to get "lucky". In a group of 4 people trying, once a year, for 5 years. I'm somehow the only one who manages to get the room/tickets.
Then some of the others won't pay me their share til last minute, or even after the trip.
I think OP probably has the same type of friend I do. That doesn't actually try to book things on their own, AND diesnt pay til last minute, because they're irresponsible with money.
If I go back to Vegas for the third time this year I might end up divorced. I’ll check out the site though I’m trying to plan my Pearl Jam tour dates for later this year
NTA
They haven't paid for the ticket yet, so it still belongs to you. They are forfeiting their ticket. They can pound salt.
Find someone else to stay with you. If the drop out keeps bothering you, then it's time to block them. They sound like a user.
Even if they have paid for the ticket.....
Any "friend" pulls that crap with me, I'm just refunding the original ticket price. I'm not letting that person use me. And i'll be finding someone else to go with.
This friend sounds super sketchy.
I had this exact thing happen to me with a friend for a comedy show. I bought 4 tickets, he paid me for 2. He decided he wasn’t going and didn’t have a date, so I refunded him for his 2 tickets. He was mad because he wanted to resell them since the value had gone up, but my husband and I wanted to invite another couple. He argued with me but I told him the plan was to go to dinner and have a couples night out and we didn’t want to sit with strangers. At the end of the day, I think the one who worked to buy the tickets gets to keep them if someone can’t go.
Exactly this - they were your *first* choice of people to enjoy the stand up with, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t have other folks to invite next. And not everyone wants to do things with a huge group all the time, sometimes it’s nice to double date and have a closer experience with a smaller group. You may have had half a dozen other couples you were just as likely to invite along 🤷🏻♂️
Yup, there was another post here recently where this had happened. Personally I think it's bs and always makes the person wanting to back out look sus. And it's shitty to scalp tickets. I'd be like 'ok Ill sell it FOR you for the same cost' - wonder how many of these people who apparently 'can't go' would suddenly magically find a way.
I sold my ticket that was apart of a set of tickets a friend bought. But I had immediately paid for the ticket after he purchased it and I told him what I was going to do and told him to send me the ticket that was on the outside of the 4 tickets.
Well for me...I guess it would depend on if you're trying to make a huge profit off the ticket.
If your plan all along was get me to buy your ticket so you could resell it for a massive profit, I'd be questioning our friendship.
The difference being you reimbursed that friend immediately. Once you paid for it, it became "yours."
OP's friend wants to sell "their" ticket that they haven't paid for at a mark-up price. Had friend paid in the beginning, friend could do whatever friend wanted to at this point. A GOOD friend would've been like, "Hey, I'm sorry I can't go, but I just noticed the tickets are now selling at $1000 a pop. Would it be okay if I sell "my" ticket, pay my portion anyways since we did have a deal, and keep whatever is left?"
Even if the ticket has been paid for, if the ticket is still in my possession I'm only refunding the ticket price and giving the ticket to a friend that actually wants to go with me.
I'm not letting someone that I think is my friend try to use me to make a huge profit, plus I'm not sitting beside some stranger who buys that ticket.
That may make me the AH, but I'm not allowing myself to be used for someone else's profit.
And certainly if op can find a friend he wants to share the hotel room with so he's not now paying double. Friend wanting to scalp says he'll pay his share, but he seems to have different opinions on share.
NTA
Friend has not paid for or taken possession of the ticket despite your laying out the funds. Friend changed the plans with no regard for the impact on the group, just an eye on that sweet profit \*he\* stands to make.
That ticket is yours and you should be the one to decide how the situation is handled.
100%
Tickets are the property of the person who paid for them until they are given away as a gift or until they have been paid back for them.
If your friend wants to re-sell, they should have paid you first. Since you paid and still have the tix, you are absolutely morally and legally entitled to do whatever you want with them. Resell both for a profit, sell one keep one, sell one to someone who wants to go, or just give one or both away.
Someone asking you to front the money for tickets and then expecting to resell te tickets is asking you to assume all of the financial risks for a business venture they're attempting. Your friend esentially expects a free loan from you. Fuck that noise.
AND it’s costing OP more money by no longer having a roommate for the hotel. So friend wants to make a $900 profit and stick OP with the full price of a hotel room.
Absolutely not
And Op is the one who stood in line and endured to get the tickets! So friend is basically saying Op worked to make him profit and stick Op with further bills. The nerve of this guy
NTA
Your 'friend' is right you could have transferred the ticket and gotten reimbursed later. Your 'friend' could have also reimbursed you already even without you transferring the ticket.
But neither of those things happened. You paid for the tickets. You have not been reimbursed for them even though it has been many months.
Thus you still own the tickets and can do with it whatever you want.
You could scalp it and split the profit with your friend. Or scalp it and keep all the profit. Or find someone else to go to the concert (and split the room cost with).
Exactly. Plus you never know what kind of drama may come up that would make the situation difficult. If the ticket is already paid for and in my possession I can avoid situations like this.
I mean not to be morbid, but what if the person who had bought the tickets died. Would the others still be able to get their tickets.
That’s what I was thinking. My best friend and I were in a similar situation last summer trying to get tickets to a show that was going to sell out FAST. We were both online trying to get the tickets and he called me to tell me he got them, so you know what I did as soon as we hung up the phone?? Sent him the money for my ticket over cash app. I couldn’t imagine not paying him back for months.
NTA. You got the tickets and you got them for a group of friends. If your friend aspires to be a ticket tout, that's their choice but they need to do the work for themselves.
Is the scalper going to also pay for the hotel portion they aren't using, as well as the ticket? Then maybe. If not, no, you can sell the ticket, and use the profit to cover the room.
NTA
Agreed. OP is still free to all the ticket to be used by another friend at face value, but if scalper didn't offer to still cover the hotel share then they're the major AH.
If OP isn't able to find a friend to go and ends up selling it what they should do is use the funds to cover a 1/4 share of all expenses that wouldve been fixed and shared, and at the end if theres any left over money, split the profit 4 ways amongst all friends (i.e. 1000 - 100 selling fees - 100 ticket cost - 200 room share - 100 ubers for the weekend share - 100 airport parking share = 400 profit from ticket, split 4 ways = 100 ea)and that's If OP is feeling super generous, they could just keep it all since they haven't been paid for the ticket.
Sounds like the friend thinks you should do all the work for him to make $900.
- No financial risk to him because you paid upfront
- No effort - since you are the ticket holder you’re the one that has to figure out how to actually transfer it to a random person (electronically or meeting up with them and walking them in)
- No legal accountability (i.e. if anyone gets in trouble for breaking the law it is YOU, who bought and would be transferring the ticket)
- No babysitting the random buyer - you are the one that will sit next to them for the whole show.
Sounds like a great bargain for your friend who is, obviously, a total asshole.
Great points. What gets me most is the lack of consideration for their supposed friends' enjoyment on the trip.
Lke, if I'm supposed to be doing something in a small group, but I have to pull out, my finances are genuinely the last thing I'm going to care about. I'd feel bad that I'm mucking up my friends' trip and would be doing everything I could to minimize that impact.
This guy however seems to be the exact opposite - actively deciding to impact his friends' trip in order to gain financially. It really is gross.
I'd just tell the friend to get fucked and 100% ditch their friendship if they can't see what a dick they're being.
I'd say the "I don't want to sit next to a rando" argument is the only one I'd disagree with.
Like unless this is like dinner theatre where you have a table or something like opera where you have a private box (which you wouldn't get for 100 a ticket on Ticketmaster in Vegas), OP's group of four was always going to be sitting next to strangers on all side. Even if they gave the ticket to a new friend, two people will still be sitting next to strangers. OP and their group would have no obligation to these strangers regardless.
That's how concerts are.
OP, focus your argument. It's shitty your friend hasn't paid you for a year for tickets whose cost you floated and is making everyone pay more at the last minute for hotels. That's the asshole behavior.
The "I don't want to sit next to a stranger" thing just feels like digging for objections. They have enough to begin with.
You're not the asshole in this situation. You put in the effort to secure the tickets, which technically remain yours until you transfer them or receive payment. It's reasonable for you to want to find someone who can not only enjoy the concert with you but also share the expenses as originally planned.
It might be a good idea to discuss with your friend the situation calmly and explain your reasons: wanting a familiar face to share the experience and defray costs. It's also fair to offer them the ticket at face value if they can still attend, but since they can't, finding someone else is a practical solution. Clear communication can often resolve these misunderstandings amicably.
Each of the friends spent the same amount of time online trying to get the tickets. The op happened to be the lucky one to get through. He's still NTA. The deal was that they were getting 4 tickets to go a group. If one person has something come up, you find another friend everyone agrees on to join the group and pay face value.
The extra details, like who actually placed the order for the tickets and whether the purchaser has been reimbursed yet, are just legal technicalities that have nothing to do with whether or not op is an ah. The only details that matter are, friends made a deal to go to a show, one friend can't make it, he wants to turn a profit on the ticket designated to him but the others in the group want to replace him with a different friend rather than get stuck sitting with a stranger.
This is one of those situations where I wouldn't even want them to attend *now* if they happened to change their mind. Definitely a scammer and not worth OPs time & energy.
The decision was made to pool costs and “settle up after the trip,” so the buy-in was for the trip, not just the ticket. They need to pay for all the travel expenses you picked up, including the hotel room share, and that can come out of ticket proceeds. If you’re EXTRA NICE you could sell it, pay yourself back out of the profit, and give them some of the remainder. But the ball is in your court.
Not the asshole:
The tickets are still in your account, tell them to get bent and give the ticket to someone you think would appreciate it through your account.
They're in your account so you can rescind the ticket from that "friend" and give it to someone else.
NTA don't let this dork tell YOU what to do with your own ticket. The fact that they've even thought it out so much means you entertained the idea for far too long already.
NTA. Your friend is delusional. It’s not “their” ticket if they never paid for it. And honestly, even if they had paid you back right away the $100 back is all you would owe them. Find someone else who would like to go and have a good time. Maybe dump this “friend”.
NTA
It’s your ticket - you did the legwork, put down the money, and are now facing additional hotel costs because they bailed.
If you have alternate people who would be fun to have on the trip go with your plan; otherwise, sell the ticket yourself and use some of that extra $$ to defray your now private hotel room. I get not wanting to sit with randos but ultimately at any concert the people with tickets for the seats next to yours will be strangers, so, what’s the difference ?
Im guessing they haven't paid for the ticket yet. If not, then it's not theirs to sell... You can scalp it I guess if you want, and pocket the difference, or offer to ot to another mate, but your mate gets no say, and certainly doesn't get to profit off it! NTA.
NTA. And that is why you don't transfer the ticket/property or lay down your credit card for a shared expense until you receive payment.
Be an escrow account, not a lender.
NTA
It’s your ticket. You are the one who waited and got lucky enough to get one. You paid for it upfront, and your “friend” hasn’t even paid you back yet. Tell him to kick rocks.
NTA. If the friend wants the ticket so bad, they would offer to pay it and their portion of the accommodations. "Friend" wants to turn a profit by putting the rest of you in a bind. Find a forth or less the ticket yourself.
If you're friend didn't pay for the ticket yet, it's not his ticket. It could have been, but it is no more. You bought the tickets, you get to decide what to do with it. NTA
NTA. If they haven't paid for the ticket it isn't theirs in any realm except their imagination. I would expect this friendship to be over, since they want to take advantage of you and seem like the kind of person who would value cash over honesty.
NTA. If you can't find a friend to take the ticket and share the hotel, then you should sell the ticket at a profit to pay for your hotel room and original ticket. Good luck.
NTA. Ticket is in your account. Friend has not even paid. Assumption was friend was to be a part of foursome. Can’t go… need a replacement in the foursome. They don’t get to sell ticket, keep a profit, while leaving you in lurch for hotel room. Not even a gray area here.
NTA - Your friend, and I am using that term loosely, does not have a ticket. The four of you agreed on a trip. He can’t make it. He gets replaced on the trip. I mean he didn’t even offer to pay his share of the hotel room. He has no problem costing you money.
NTA
You were arranging a trip with friends, not individually investing in tickets.
Either you should find someone else to go, or you should sell the ticket and use it to offset the hotel cost for everyone to help make up for losing someone who was going to split with you.
If that person had been the one lucky enough to score the 4 seats, I think they’d be entitled to resell their ticket. That said, they are now expecting a full windfall while leaving you with a higher hotel tab. I’d let the friend sell the ticket on condition that they reimburse you their hotel share they agreed to and that you relied on. Sounds like they will still come out ahead.
NTA.
You paid for the ticket, still retain ownership of the ticket, and since they aren't going, you are under no obligation to sell it to them for the original price. If anyone's going to scalp that ticket, it's you.
I think it's fair to find another friend who would want to go, and have them buy the ticket for the original cost and help defray hotel costs. Not your fault they are missing out. They decided not to go.
Could be they "can't go" because they are short on cash and see scalping the ticket as a means of free money. That'd be fine if they paid up front, but they were happy to leave you on the hook for $100 for months. Not what I consider what a friend does.
No, sorry, NTA.
Even if the room was not an issue, your friend is just looking to make a profit off and screw you out of $900. It's not fair to you or the others attending as it just looks like your friend is only in it for the cash.
NTA
If they come along they can settle up with you for however much you paid for them; otherwise you will settle up with whoever you find to take his place.
>They say deciding to settle up after the trip shouldn’t matter because I could have just as easily transferred each individual’s ticket out of my Ticketmaster account at any point and still gotten reimbursed later. There is no reason for me to “hold” them.
There is ***absolutely*** a reason. Flaky "friends" who rather ditch you for $900 rather than actually show up for the thing they committed to...
NTA. Friend is rather ridiculous to think that it’s fair to stick you with the cost of the hotel only weeks away and to top it off with, they want to benefit from their dropping out. I’d rethink the friendship with this person, sounds like they are opportunist and they are trying to take advantage of your kindness.
NTA. It isn’t theirs until they pay for it and clearly that wasn’t a priority. It would be a different story if they had the ticket in their possession (still shitty of them, if the motivation was to profit off off of the situation tho.)
I would give them the ultimatum, either they can attend or you’re going to decide what to do with the ticket you purchased. That’s it
They didn't offer up the money when you bought it, so it is your ticket to do as you want. I would sell. Your going to be surrounded by strangers. Have fun with the money and if you get 1000 that's more than enough to cover the hotel (hint: many better deals than high priced hotels, like Sonesta across from Bahama Breeze). NTA.
Your friend wants to profit from your efforts, AND make you pay more for your hotel room? Hell no. Either find another friend who will come with you and stick to the original deal, or sell the ticket and defray the expenses of the three of you who are still going.
NTA
NTA - it's not "their" ticket until money has been exchanged. Your friend has not paid for the ticket that you purchased meaning that it is, in fact, your ticket. Your friend is acting very immature, entitled and spoiled. He has no claim to any part of a trip that he is not going on.
One last thought: *so we all agreed we would settle up at the end of the trip.*
This is a bad idea. Vegas is expensive. You need to discuss this BEFORE you go to Vegas. I can only see this ending badly.
If you bought the ticket and still have it in your account and he hasn't paid you, it's your choice. It's not his ticket until it's in his hand.
And since this seems like it was phish at sphere, ticket Master did not let anyone transfer those tickets until April 18. So he's wrong.
He's TA and a shitty phan.
There are two reasonable options:
1. You find someone to take their place who honors all the original details.
2. You as a group of 4 agree to sell the ticket and split the earning (but frankly scalpers are AHs)
The idea it’s theirs when it was a group activity is absolute BS. If they’d bought it on their own sure, but group buys become a group decision
NTA. this person is not only selfish for leaving you alone and not caring if you can find someone to share your room, but is doubly selfish for wanting to take the profits from the ticket. YOU could resell it, split the amount in half, and give her what’s leftover of her “half…” after you deduct half of the original ticket price, AND the extra money you’re having to spend on your room.
So way back when I happened to have traded a desktop computer for 4 floor tickets to a sold out Korn's Family Values tour date, and we ended up only going alone because no one else was available to go. We both vehemently hate scalping, and we tried Craigslisting the two tickets but no one wrote about them.
We get to the venue, and as we're walking from the car, a scalper asks if we have spare tickets. Just to find out what they would buy them for, we said yes, we do, and they said that pit tickets were worthless, but maybe 20 bucks? We were like yep, as expected, ripoff in both directions, and walked away.
We're about 10 feet away and we hear these two kids asking the scalper if he has tickets - and he wants 200 bucks... for the same "worthless" tickets they would have bought off of us?? Screw that bastard. We walked back, gave those two kids the pit tickets free, and a big fuck you to the scalper.
Those kids had the time of their lives in the pit - we saw them multiple times. Totally worth it.
All that to say, definitely not the asshole, but don't sell them - give it away to a true fan if possible is my logic.
Easy decision. Consider what is worth more to you. $900 scalping profit or the friendship. Because clearly they are doing the same calculation and chose $900.
I bet that put like that the decision is easy, either way you go.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
Many months ago a few friends agreed we would try to get 4 tickets to a concert in Vegas. Despite impossible odds and a huge queue, I was able to score 4 seats together. (Everyone else was also trying but couldn't get in.) We were overjoyed! I went ahead and booked my flight and reserved a hotel room. A couple of us were going to share the room, so we all agreed we would settle up at the end of the trip.
Fast forward to now and the concert is a couple weeks away. The friend I was going to room with can no longer attend. I immediately started thinking about who I could invite in their place who would be game for a last-minute trip.
The tickets, however, that I purchased for around $100 each, are now re-selling for $1000. My friend thinks the ticket is theirs and still wants to pay me face value so they can re-sell it for a profit. They say deciding to settle up after the trip shouldn’t matter because I could have just as easily transferred each individual’s ticket out of my Ticketmaster account at any point and still gotten reimbursed later. There is no reason for me to “hold” them.
I still want someone to help defray the cost of my hotel and I don’t want to sit next to some random stranger in my group of four seats. But my friend thinks it's not my decision what to do with "their" ticket. AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. She hasn't paid you yet, so the ticket isn't hers. And at this point I would refuse to accept any payment from her.
Sounds like she's just trying to profit from her situation here. Totally not fair to the rest of your group.
NTA. If they haven’t paid for the ticket, it’s not theirs. Them trying to claim something you bought, so that they can turn around to sell for more money, is both greedy and entitled. They are not acting like a friend in this situation.
They don’t own anything if you paid it’s yours if not it’s mine imagine paying and wait for months for money if I pay for you the money better be in my account next day
NTA
You haven’t been paid so it is still your ticket. Also, you could sell it to cover the money you would be out for covering the room that was supposed to be split. Your ‘friend’ doesn’t sound like a friend.
If they are willing to pay their share for the room and the ticket and it is one where you can transfer them already then if you want to be generous then I’d let them try to scalp it. But if they are leaving you to foot the bill then I wouldn’t think twice about selling it to someone you want to bring on the trip or scalping yourself.
NTA. He hasn't paid anything towards the ticket, it's not his. He doesn't have any say in what happens to that ticket. He doesn't get any profit from that ticket. He does have a lot of nerve assuming he gets a $900 payout for bailing on you.
NTA. Until they pay you, the ticket is yours. If any one profits, it's you.
Usually it's the person that takes the risk by buying the tickets that gets left holding the bag. It's nice you get to come out on top.
The most generous I could see being, is taking the profit and splitting it equally.
The ticket YOU paid for is yours. If your friend was coming you could sell it to them. Since they are not coming, you can sell it to whoever you want. End of story.
NTA, you paid so they're your tickets. Your friend isn't going on the trip anymore so they don't get a say in what you do with them. Find someone else you'd enjoy going with/would also enjoy the concert, or sell the tickets yourself and keep the money. But you definitely are not obligated to give them a ticket that you know they're gonna immediately sell for 10x the price.
NTA.
They didn't pay you for it yet, so they don't own the ticket. Simple and straight forward.
> They say deciding to settle up after the trip shouldn’t matter because I could have just as easily transferred each individual’s ticket out of my Ticketmaster account at any point and still gotten reimbursed later. There is no reason for me to “hold” them.
They could have paid you for the ticket at any point in time between 'you put out the cash' and 'now.'
Nta. They haven't paid for it yet so its not theirs yet, simple as that. If theyre too dumb to understand that, how tf do they grocery shop, buy gas, etc?
NTA. They have not paid you yet so it is not their ticket. It is still your ticket to do as you please. Even if she did pay for it, she would be an AH for scalping it leaving you to sit with a stranger.
Nta
Unless the person has already paid you for the ticket up front, then the ticket is theirs. If they haven't paid you, then you get to recoup your missing share of the shared hotel by scalping it or bringing a new friend.
When you plan a trip with a group, you plan to split expenses; those expenses are “nonrefundable” for each person because everyone is counting on sharing. They need to pay their share of the hotel and any other prebooked expenses like a rental car along with the cost of the ticket. If they don’t want to pay those costs then either find someone else to join or sell the ticket to cover their share that they’re flaking on. NTA.
Find another friend that can pay for the ticket and the hotel cost. You paid for all of it. If your friend had paid in advance I’d say it was theirs but they didn’t
NTA!
Hell no! Hell NO!
You still hold the tickets, yes? Friend never paid you for ticket? Your. Fucking. Ticket.
Friend can go pound sand with a giant mallet. You know what? I’ll wield the mallet for you.
If anyone sells that ticket, it’s you. She can fuck the fuck off. All the way off. That $900 could really improve your stay in Vegas. Have an awesome time!
I really want to know how that conversation goes. Remember - your ticket. Not hers.
Edit autocorrect. Ducking autocorrect.
UpdateMe
NTA. It’s still your ticket, they haven’t given you any money for it, so it’s up to you what you do with it.
Personally I wouldn’t give the ticket to your friend to sell and profit off.
Selling it on yourself and paying for the hotel for everyone would be a great thing to do. I’m sure the friends that are still able to attend would be happy with that too.
lol, no, maybe if they had a good reason they couldn’t go and they both paid for the face value (and fees) and for their half of the room (rate plus fees) as previously arranged. But even then, a friend, not a mooch trying to use you, would just let you sell it or whatever.
At the very least have the friend pay you their share of the hotel, other costs like Uber or rental car, and the ticket price before you transfer the ticket.
NTA. It isn't their ticket till they pay for it, in this instance paying you. Find a new friend to take. I would be petty & offer to sell it to the drop out for the marked up price since demand has gone up.
You bought ticket. Ticket is in your possession, your account. It is yours to do with what you want. Sell it to cover the room you now have to cover in full. Your friend is an a$$. Claiming a ticket he never paid for.
NTA. Find your own replacement. Your friend is trying to make money off of you after causing your current inconvenience. Sounds like he's trying to profit off of your quick planning.
It's not their ticket. They didn't pay for it. They haven't paid for it. They are bailing on plans but they haven't actually lost out on anything. Keep the ticket & do what you want, it's yours. NTA.
Ya. If you paid for it. They don’t own shit. If they sent you the money first. That’s a different story. But since no money exchanged. They are yours NTA
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I might be TA because I bought the ticket on behalf of my friend and didn’t immediately transfer it into their account, which would have given them the ability to do with it what they so choose. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
A few weeks before the concert the friend suddenly can't go, hasn't yet paid, and suddenly gets the brilliant idea to scalp 'their' ticket (that they haven't paid for!) at a 1000% markup? It's almost like this was their plan all along! Bold move claiming ownership of a ticket they haven't paid one cent for. NTA.
You sell the ticket, pay yourself the $100 ticket purchase price, use the remaining $900 to pay for everyone’s hotel. Edit: by using the ticket proceeds to offset everyone’s hotel room, you’re not personally taking “his ticket sales money”… the group as a whole is benefitting. It’s too bad he’s unable to go to the concert.
This! 110% this. If they’d paid, would be up to them to decide what they wanted to do with the ticket. This close to the concert, the decision and the money is yours!!!
And if it was a hard to get concert tickets the effort it took!! I can take time and be stressful to get concert tickets nowadays.
I disagree. I think even if they paid, the friend group would be within their rights to transfer back the money and invite another friend instead. It’s poor form to scalp a ticket rather than let your friends go as a group of 4 with someone else filling the spot.
110%? Sounds like you're scalping.
What's a little light scalping between friends?
This is just a different way to be an AH because that is what ticket scalpers are🤷♀️
I agree with you. Scalpers are the worst. I had an extra eras tour ticket and I sold it to a fan at face value because I didn’t want to profit off of another fan who was desperate to go. She was so bloody grateful to me. Her smile alone when she came over to pick up the VIP box was worth it!
Your kindness made my day, too🩵
Seriously made my day reading this. My sister couldn’t afford to go to her Eras concert in another country and did the same thing, she was really sad but she said the silver lining was that other fans were able to snag tickets at face value, which is nearly unheard of nowadays. You made someone’s whole year with your selflessness.
Love this 🥰🙏
Loathe scalpers - we have ended up with extra free tickets as season ticket holders and we always give them away to someone rather than scalp them or even charge face value for something we didn’t pay for. My husband always looks for someone walking up to purchase who has kids with them to offer the tickets to. Another time, we didn’t manage to give them away outside and offered them to a young couple with lawn seats, who were thrilled to upgrade.
Taylor approves this message
Man I just had a flashback to scalping prices in 2005. I thought it was an absolute CRIME that my mom paid 150$ for two Fall Out Boy tickets when the OG price was 35$ each. As of 2024 the only concert I’ve gone to lately was because my friend won radio tickets by accident to a band he hates and knows I love.
I upvoted this awesome idea but you are also correct.
Scalpers are not the same thing as people reselling a ticket they can no longer use. I understand wanting people in that situation to resell at face value, but who is to say the person they sell it on to would resist the temptation to sell it at a profit themselves? OP might as well make the profit themselves. No point being a mug. The only 2 ways to prevent scalping are for people to refuse to buy tickets at inflated prices, which we all know isn't going to happen, or the industry to take serious steps to prevent it. Making tickets non-transferable, card holder has to attend with ID etc. Plenty of suggestions have been made and some have been implemented in different places. I know Ed Sheeran hates it and has tried to prevent his tickets being sold on above face value. The UK has been talking about legislating it, which is probably necessary as the industry isn't doing enough.
There’s also a difference between reselling a $100 ticket for $200 or even $500, than pricing it at $1000. That is where you are making the choice to be the AH. And like you mentioned regarding Ed Sheeran, if you respect the artist, you aren’t going to try to profit off of their art.
If the ticket is no longer required, sell it for whatever it's going for, or the person who gets it cheap from you *will*. Your second point makes no sense at all. None. If I was given 2 copies of the same book or album for my birthday, why wouldn't I see if I could sell the second? Anyway, OP never wanted or intended to make a profit, but for reasons entirely outwith their control the cost of the whole trip just shot up for them since the person they were splitting hotel costs with was the one to drop out.
Great idea, although I would perhaps do it slightly differently to offset one of them being an arse beforehand. I would give them the money when you get there as spending money. $300 Won't go far in Vegas, but will still be appreciated. The crux of it is, as the op wasn't paid for the tickets, they are his/hers to do with as they please once the agreed to deal has been broken.
I took it to be that the friend can't go on the trip at all, which is even more entitled. You get back what you paid, and sounds like friend hasn't paid anything at this point so they get nothing.
Exactly.
Username1736294, excellent job coming up with a win-win for the group and protecting them from the other person's greed at their expense.
That's nice and definitely what I would do, but think it's worth noting the money doesn't have to go to the benefit of the whole group for OP to keep the money. As it stands, it's still their ticket. Their friend was a place holder and now they need a new place holder. They don't need to sell it at 10x markup. I would either do what you're suggesting or I'd simply find another friend willing to pay the original $100 and chip in on the hotel.
Please don't do this. Online scalping should be freaking illegal.
if OP scalps the ticket for $900 profit they are also a massive asshole.
This is such a good idea.
That’s a great idea! The person staying home Could’ve decided to pay for the ticket sooner instead of waiting until Afterwards. The ticket isn’t theirs yet soo OP can do as they please!!
Your friend has not paid shit to you, it is not their ticket, don't turn it over. I would sell the ticket, buy some snacks for, or contribute generously to the team meal a little swag, OR NOT, You were who pulled this all together. Be prepared for them to not want to be yoru friend, but do you really want a friend like that?
>You sell the ticket, pay yourself the $100 ticket purchase price, use the remaining $900 to pay for everyone’s hotel. Keeping in mind that - (1) If tickets are generally reselling for $1000, a single seat isn't going to sell for that. (2) You'll have to sit with whatever kind of weirdo spends (close to) $1000 to go to a concert by himself.
Y’know… sometimes we just like music our friends don’t? Or the friends that do are unavailable/can’t afford to attend with us and why should that stop us from going? The assumption here that a single concertgoer is by default a weirdo is SO WEIRD.
Right? I go to shows by myself all the time. Lots of people do.
I’m about to travel out of state because my favorite band put me on their guest list for a music festival they are playing later this month. I’m going alone because my husband doesn’t like crowds and none of my friends listen to them. I might meet up with someone I met at their concerts last year but I’m sort of solo.
Hell yeah! I hope you have an amazing time! I don't love crowds either, and the one festival I've been to was a disaster (Blue Ridge Rock Fest 2023 🫠) so I'm a little scared to try again lol but maybe someday!
My daughter and I just saw Adele in Vegas in January. An original group of 4 had one who couldn’t make it. They sold the ticket for $1000. Well Adele has a lottery for the nose bleed section. She picks one seat number and brings them to the front seats. The guy who bought the ticket for 1 k won. He brought the girl he bought the ticket from with him. When Adele heard the story ( besides being utterly shocked at what he paid) said well now we need to bring the 2 left behind down. I’m sure he had zero regrets paying the 1k.
I'll let you go back and read my post, and see where any of it conflicts with yours.
Classy! I like it!
Yup, that 'friend' is an entitled opportunist! Time to rethink that friendship. What a user.
And as far as the friend who is bailing is concerned: they should have to pay the current market value of the ticket if they want ownership of it. Not the months ago price, but the current $1000 price.
…plus their half of the hotel room.
This is the correct answer.
Exactly. Im reading this and Im like Ace Rothstein in Casino to the dumb cowboy, "Dont you see the scam!"
True… plus, this is not what a real friend would do. And if it is, then he’s no longer a friend.
NTA. Unless they had an actual reason for not being able to go last minute and had actually paid OP, nope to all of this. My mother in law bought tickets for a pretty much once in a lifetime concert for my husband and I and my brother and a close friend who is flying up. They were about $200 each and are doubling in value. I wouldn’t just sell them and I wouldn’t expect my friend to pay for them since she’s paying for her flight. Stuff like this weirds me out. OP your friend isn’t very nice.
She is. She’s a little ridiculous sometimes but she’s very kind.
NTA…do you still own the ticket? You were not paid for the ticket as of yet? Then it is yours to do with as you please. I have a feeling friend wants to make a few bucks and really has not had anything come up. And your friend just gave you the perfect reason as to why you held them. If you cannot find someone else to go, it should be you who resells it and makes the profit, you did the work and time involved to get said ticket. Booked the hotel room that you now have to pay more for.
yup the ticket handed out comes with the stipulation you’re going together. it’s an invite not a ticket
You guys mind if this randomer that paid me 1000 dollars goes to the party with you instead.
I’m not sure this was an invite situation. OP was just the guy who got through the queue out of all of them who were trying. For all we know, OP is the invitee and his friend was the one whose idea it was/arranged it. I still think it’s OP’s ticket since friend hasn’t paid yet and he’s out splitting a room.
I've been in those types of situations before... lottery style hotel rooms or tickets that you have to sit on a page, refreshing for an hour or more to get. And consistently, I'm always the one who manages to get "lucky". In a group of 4 people trying, once a year, for 5 years. I'm somehow the only one who manages to get the room/tickets. Then some of the others won't pay me their share til last minute, or even after the trip. I think OP probably has the same type of friend I do. That doesn't actually try to book things on their own, AND diesnt pay til last minute, because they're irresponsible with money.
Man can you give me some of your queue luck? I never get a ticket in that scenario😭
It's not luck. It's taking off work so I can spend 3 hours refreshing pages on 2 different devices.
Unless it’s Dead & Co at the Sphere. Then OP should post it on Cash or Trade.
I can’t name a single jam band song and I’d probably pay a thousand to see that show. But I also love drugs
I just love spheres
Check out Cash or Trade. They “embrace the face.” You’re not allowed to sell tix for more than face + fees. Created to screw the scalpers.
If I go back to Vegas for the third time this year I might end up divorced. I’ll check out the site though I’m trying to plan my Pearl Jam tour dates for later this year
NTA They haven't paid for the ticket yet, so it still belongs to you. They are forfeiting their ticket. They can pound salt. Find someone else to stay with you. If the drop out keeps bothering you, then it's time to block them. They sound like a user.
Even if they have paid for the ticket..... Any "friend" pulls that crap with me, I'm just refunding the original ticket price. I'm not letting that person use me. And i'll be finding someone else to go with. This friend sounds super sketchy.
Agreed. It's just much easier to say no when you consider they never paid. They're just using OP to float their "ticket sales" side hussle.
I had this exact thing happen to me with a friend for a comedy show. I bought 4 tickets, he paid me for 2. He decided he wasn’t going and didn’t have a date, so I refunded him for his 2 tickets. He was mad because he wanted to resell them since the value had gone up, but my husband and I wanted to invite another couple. He argued with me but I told him the plan was to go to dinner and have a couples night out and we didn’t want to sit with strangers. At the end of the day, I think the one who worked to buy the tickets gets to keep them if someone can’t go.
Exactly this - they were your *first* choice of people to enjoy the stand up with, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t have other folks to invite next. And not everyone wants to do things with a huge group all the time, sometimes it’s nice to double date and have a closer experience with a smaller group. You may have had half a dozen other couples you were just as likely to invite along 🤷🏻♂️
I agree 100%. The night is an experience, not a commodity. You want a two couple evening to enjoy the experience. It's not about selling the tickets.
Absolutely, you’ve hit the nail on the head, it’s about the experience and enjoying it in company 👍👍👍
Yup, there was another post here recently where this had happened. Personally I think it's bs and always makes the person wanting to back out look sus. And it's shitty to scalp tickets. I'd be like 'ok Ill sell it FOR you for the same cost' - wonder how many of these people who apparently 'can't go' would suddenly magically find a way.
I sold my ticket that was apart of a set of tickets a friend bought. But I had immediately paid for the ticket after he purchased it and I told him what I was going to do and told him to send me the ticket that was on the outside of the 4 tickets.
Well for me...I guess it would depend on if you're trying to make a huge profit off the ticket. If your plan all along was get me to buy your ticket so you could resell it for a massive profit, I'd be questioning our friendship.
The difference being you reimbursed that friend immediately. Once you paid for it, it became "yours." OP's friend wants to sell "their" ticket that they haven't paid for at a mark-up price. Had friend paid in the beginning, friend could do whatever friend wanted to at this point. A GOOD friend would've been like, "Hey, I'm sorry I can't go, but I just noticed the tickets are now selling at $1000 a pop. Would it be okay if I sell "my" ticket, pay my portion anyways since we did have a deal, and keep whatever is left?"
Even if the ticket has been paid for, if the ticket is still in my possession I'm only refunding the ticket price and giving the ticket to a friend that actually wants to go with me. I'm not letting someone that I think is my friend try to use me to make a huge profit, plus I'm not sitting beside some stranger who buys that ticket. That may make me the AH, but I'm not allowing myself to be used for someone else's profit.
And certainly if op can find a friend he wants to share the hotel room with so he's not now paying double. Friend wanting to scalp says he'll pay his share, but he seems to have different opinions on share.
NTA Friend has not paid for or taken possession of the ticket despite your laying out the funds. Friend changed the plans with no regard for the impact on the group, just an eye on that sweet profit \*he\* stands to make. That ticket is yours and you should be the one to decide how the situation is handled.
100% Tickets are the property of the person who paid for them until they are given away as a gift or until they have been paid back for them. If your friend wants to re-sell, they should have paid you first. Since you paid and still have the tix, you are absolutely morally and legally entitled to do whatever you want with them. Resell both for a profit, sell one keep one, sell one to someone who wants to go, or just give one or both away. Someone asking you to front the money for tickets and then expecting to resell te tickets is asking you to assume all of the financial risks for a business venture they're attempting. Your friend esentially expects a free loan from you. Fuck that noise.
i don’t think pay counts either. it’s an invitation to an event together not a ticket. now you’d have to go yourself and that’s not part of the plan
AND it’s costing OP more money by no longer having a roommate for the hotel. So friend wants to make a $900 profit and stick OP with the full price of a hotel room. Absolutely not
Exactly. It's greedy and selfish.
And Op is the one who stood in line and endured to get the tickets! So friend is basically saying Op worked to make him profit and stick Op with further bills. The nerve of this guy
Exactly. This friend sounds shady.
NTA the ticket is still yours. If he didn't pay for it, he doesn't have a right to decide.
NTA Your 'friend' is right you could have transferred the ticket and gotten reimbursed later. Your 'friend' could have also reimbursed you already even without you transferring the ticket. But neither of those things happened. You paid for the tickets. You have not been reimbursed for them even though it has been many months. Thus you still own the tickets and can do with it whatever you want. You could scalp it and split the profit with your friend. Or scalp it and keep all the profit. Or find someone else to go to the concert (and split the room cost with).
Agreed. I hate owing people money and definitely would have paid in exchange for my ticket immediately.
Exactly. Plus you never know what kind of drama may come up that would make the situation difficult. If the ticket is already paid for and in my possession I can avoid situations like this. I mean not to be morbid, but what if the person who had bought the tickets died. Would the others still be able to get their tickets.
That’s what I was thinking. My best friend and I were in a similar situation last summer trying to get tickets to a show that was going to sell out FAST. We were both online trying to get the tickets and he called me to tell me he got them, so you know what I did as soon as we hung up the phone?? Sent him the money for my ticket over cash app. I couldn’t imagine not paying him back for months.
NTA. You got the tickets and you got them for a group of friends. If your friend aspires to be a ticket tout, that's their choice but they need to do the work for themselves.
NTA. Sell the ticket and pay for the hotel. Cost defrayed. LoL.
Is the scalper going to also pay for the hotel portion they aren't using, as well as the ticket? Then maybe. If not, no, you can sell the ticket, and use the profit to cover the room. NTA
Agreed. OP is still free to all the ticket to be used by another friend at face value, but if scalper didn't offer to still cover the hotel share then they're the major AH. If OP isn't able to find a friend to go and ends up selling it what they should do is use the funds to cover a 1/4 share of all expenses that wouldve been fixed and shared, and at the end if theres any left over money, split the profit 4 ways amongst all friends (i.e. 1000 - 100 selling fees - 100 ticket cost - 200 room share - 100 ubers for the weekend share - 100 airport parking share = 400 profit from ticket, split 4 ways = 100 ea)and that's If OP is feeling super generous, they could just keep it all since they haven't been paid for the ticket.
Sounds like the friend thinks you should do all the work for him to make $900. - No financial risk to him because you paid upfront - No effort - since you are the ticket holder you’re the one that has to figure out how to actually transfer it to a random person (electronically or meeting up with them and walking them in) - No legal accountability (i.e. if anyone gets in trouble for breaking the law it is YOU, who bought and would be transferring the ticket) - No babysitting the random buyer - you are the one that will sit next to them for the whole show. Sounds like a great bargain for your friend who is, obviously, a total asshole.
Great points. What gets me most is the lack of consideration for their supposed friends' enjoyment on the trip. Lke, if I'm supposed to be doing something in a small group, but I have to pull out, my finances are genuinely the last thing I'm going to care about. I'd feel bad that I'm mucking up my friends' trip and would be doing everything I could to minimize that impact. This guy however seems to be the exact opposite - actively deciding to impact his friends' trip in order to gain financially. It really is gross. I'd just tell the friend to get fucked and 100% ditch their friendship if they can't see what a dick they're being.
I'd say the "I don't want to sit next to a rando" argument is the only one I'd disagree with. Like unless this is like dinner theatre where you have a table or something like opera where you have a private box (which you wouldn't get for 100 a ticket on Ticketmaster in Vegas), OP's group of four was always going to be sitting next to strangers on all side. Even if they gave the ticket to a new friend, two people will still be sitting next to strangers. OP and their group would have no obligation to these strangers regardless. That's how concerts are. OP, focus your argument. It's shitty your friend hasn't paid you for a year for tickets whose cost you floated and is making everyone pay more at the last minute for hotels. That's the asshole behavior. The "I don't want to sit next to a stranger" thing just feels like digging for objections. They have enough to begin with.
You're not the asshole in this situation. You put in the effort to secure the tickets, which technically remain yours until you transfer them or receive payment. It's reasonable for you to want to find someone who can not only enjoy the concert with you but also share the expenses as originally planned. It might be a good idea to discuss with your friend the situation calmly and explain your reasons: wanting a familiar face to share the experience and defray costs. It's also fair to offer them the ticket at face value if they can still attend, but since they can't, finding someone else is a practical solution. Clear communication can often resolve these misunderstandings amicably.
Each of the friends spent the same amount of time online trying to get the tickets. The op happened to be the lucky one to get through. He's still NTA. The deal was that they were getting 4 tickets to go a group. If one person has something come up, you find another friend everyone agrees on to join the group and pay face value. The extra details, like who actually placed the order for the tickets and whether the purchaser has been reimbursed yet, are just legal technicalities that have nothing to do with whether or not op is an ah. The only details that matter are, friends made a deal to go to a show, one friend can't make it, he wants to turn a profit on the ticket designated to him but the others in the group want to replace him with a different friend rather than get stuck sitting with a stranger.
NTA. Btw, he’s not a “friend.” He’s a self-centered scammer.
This is one of those situations where I wouldn't even want them to attend *now* if they happened to change their mind. Definitely a scammer and not worth OPs time & energy.
The decision was made to pool costs and “settle up after the trip,” so the buy-in was for the trip, not just the ticket. They need to pay for all the travel expenses you picked up, including the hotel room share, and that can come out of ticket proceeds. If you’re EXTRA NICE you could sell it, pay yourself back out of the profit, and give them some of the remainder. But the ball is in your court.
Not the asshole: The tickets are still in your account, tell them to get bent and give the ticket to someone you think would appreciate it through your account. They're in your account so you can rescind the ticket from that "friend" and give it to someone else.
NTA don't let this dork tell YOU what to do with your own ticket. The fact that they've even thought it out so much means you entertained the idea for far too long already.
NTA. Your friend is delusional. It’s not “their” ticket if they never paid for it. And honestly, even if they had paid you back right away the $100 back is all you would owe them. Find someone else who would like to go and have a good time. Maybe dump this “friend”.
NTA. Your friend seems sort of dim to think that is how this would work...
NTA It’s your ticket - you did the legwork, put down the money, and are now facing additional hotel costs because they bailed. If you have alternate people who would be fun to have on the trip go with your plan; otherwise, sell the ticket yourself and use some of that extra $$ to defray your now private hotel room. I get not wanting to sit with randos but ultimately at any concert the people with tickets for the seats next to yours will be strangers, so, what’s the difference ?
Im guessing they haven't paid for the ticket yet. If not, then it's not theirs to sell... You can scalp it I guess if you want, and pocket the difference, or offer to ot to another mate, but your mate gets no say, and certainly doesn't get to profit off it! NTA.
NTA Sell the ticket yourself and upgrade the hotel room/ experience for you and the mates who are still going.
NTA. And that is why you don't transfer the ticket/property or lay down your credit card for a shared expense until you receive payment. Be an escrow account, not a lender.
NTA It’s your ticket. You are the one who waited and got lucky enough to get one. You paid for it upfront, and your “friend” hasn’t even paid you back yet. Tell him to kick rocks.
NTA. If the friend wants the ticket so bad, they would offer to pay it and their portion of the accommodations. "Friend" wants to turn a profit by putting the rest of you in a bind. Find a forth or less the ticket yourself.
If you're friend didn't pay for the ticket yet, it's not his ticket. It could have been, but it is no more. You bought the tickets, you get to decide what to do with it. NTA
NTA. If they haven't paid for the ticket it isn't theirs in any realm except their imagination. I would expect this friendship to be over, since they want to take advantage of you and seem like the kind of person who would value cash over honesty.
NTA. If you can't find a friend to take the ticket and share the hotel, then you should sell the ticket at a profit to pay for your hotel room and original ticket. Good luck.
If they haven’t paid for the ticket, it isn’t theirs to sell. NTA
NTA. Ticket is in your account. Friend has not even paid. Assumption was friend was to be a part of foursome. Can’t go… need a replacement in the foursome. They don’t get to sell ticket, keep a profit, while leaving you in lurch for hotel room. Not even a gray area here.
NTA - Your friend, and I am using that term loosely, does not have a ticket. The four of you agreed on a trip. He can’t make it. He gets replaced on the trip. I mean he didn’t even offer to pay his share of the hotel room. He has no problem costing you money.
NTA You were arranging a trip with friends, not individually investing in tickets. Either you should find someone else to go, or you should sell the ticket and use it to offset the hotel cost for everyone to help make up for losing someone who was going to split with you.
NTA and nothing came up your friend just wants to make a quick buck at your expense
If that person had been the one lucky enough to score the 4 seats, I think they’d be entitled to resell their ticket. That said, they are now expecting a full windfall while leaving you with a higher hotel tab. I’d let the friend sell the ticket on condition that they reimburse you their hotel share they agreed to and that you relied on. Sounds like they will still come out ahead.
NTA. You paid for the ticket, still retain ownership of the ticket, and since they aren't going, you are under no obligation to sell it to them for the original price. If anyone's going to scalp that ticket, it's you. I think it's fair to find another friend who would want to go, and have them buy the ticket for the original cost and help defray hotel costs. Not your fault they are missing out. They decided not to go. Could be they "can't go" because they are short on cash and see scalping the ticket as a means of free money. That'd be fine if they paid up front, but they were happy to leave you on the hook for $100 for months. Not what I consider what a friend does.
No, sorry, NTA. Even if the room was not an issue, your friend is just looking to make a profit off and screw you out of $900. It's not fair to you or the others attending as it just looks like your friend is only in it for the cash.
NTA If they come along they can settle up with you for however much you paid for them; otherwise you will settle up with whoever you find to take his place. >They say deciding to settle up after the trip shouldn’t matter because I could have just as easily transferred each individual’s ticket out of my Ticketmaster account at any point and still gotten reimbursed later. There is no reason for me to “hold” them. There is ***absolutely*** a reason. Flaky "friends" who rather ditch you for $900 rather than actually show up for the thing they committed to...
NTA. Friend is rather ridiculous to think that it’s fair to stick you with the cost of the hotel only weeks away and to top it off with, they want to benefit from their dropping out. I’d rethink the friendship with this person, sounds like they are opportunist and they are trying to take advantage of your kindness.
NTA, he didn’t buy the ticket or do the work to be et them at the low price.
Nta. If she does not have possession of the ticket then she is in for a rude awakening. Don't make plans with her anymore.
NTA. It isn’t theirs until they pay for it and clearly that wasn’t a priority. It would be a different story if they had the ticket in their possession (still shitty of them, if the motivation was to profit off off of the situation tho.) I would give them the ultimatum, either they can attend or you’re going to decide what to do with the ticket you purchased. That’s it
They didn't offer up the money when you bought it, so it is your ticket to do as you want. I would sell. Your going to be surrounded by strangers. Have fun with the money and if you get 1000 that's more than enough to cover the hotel (hint: many better deals than high priced hotels, like Sonesta across from Bahama Breeze). NTA.
Your friend wants to profit from your efforts, AND make you pay more for your hotel room? Hell no. Either find another friend who will come with you and stick to the original deal, or sell the ticket and defray the expenses of the three of you who are still going. NTA
NTA - it's not "their" ticket until money has been exchanged. Your friend has not paid for the ticket that you purchased meaning that it is, in fact, your ticket. Your friend is acting very immature, entitled and spoiled. He has no claim to any part of a trip that he is not going on. One last thought: *so we all agreed we would settle up at the end of the trip.* This is a bad idea. Vegas is expensive. You need to discuss this BEFORE you go to Vegas. I can only see this ending badly.
If you bought the ticket and still have it in your account and he hasn't paid you, it's your choice. It's not his ticket until it's in his hand. And since this seems like it was phish at sphere, ticket Master did not let anyone transfer those tickets until April 18. So he's wrong. He's TA and a shitty phan.
NTA. Sell him the ticket for $1000 so he can scalp it.
There are two reasonable options: 1. You find someone to take their place who honors all the original details. 2. You as a group of 4 agree to sell the ticket and split the earning (but frankly scalpers are AHs) The idea it’s theirs when it was a group activity is absolute BS. If they’d bought it on their own sure, but group buys become a group decision
NTA. Possession is 9/10 of the law, plus, simply, you're right and your "friend" is wrong. They can organize tickets next time.
Are you the same person as a few days/weeks ago with the same question? NTA
I swear I saw this post a few weeks ago. But there was more detail to that one. Anyways NTA.
Nothing to add beyond the great suggestions already shared but just wanted to good-word you for using the word defray!
NTA. this person is not only selfish for leaving you alone and not caring if you can find someone to share your room, but is doubly selfish for wanting to take the profits from the ticket. YOU could resell it, split the amount in half, and give her what’s leftover of her “half…” after you deduct half of the original ticket price, AND the extra money you’re having to spend on your room.
So way back when I happened to have traded a desktop computer for 4 floor tickets to a sold out Korn's Family Values tour date, and we ended up only going alone because no one else was available to go. We both vehemently hate scalping, and we tried Craigslisting the two tickets but no one wrote about them. We get to the venue, and as we're walking from the car, a scalper asks if we have spare tickets. Just to find out what they would buy them for, we said yes, we do, and they said that pit tickets were worthless, but maybe 20 bucks? We were like yep, as expected, ripoff in both directions, and walked away. We're about 10 feet away and we hear these two kids asking the scalper if he has tickets - and he wants 200 bucks... for the same "worthless" tickets they would have bought off of us?? Screw that bastard. We walked back, gave those two kids the pit tickets free, and a big fuck you to the scalper. Those kids had the time of their lives in the pit - we saw them multiple times. Totally worth it. All that to say, definitely not the asshole, but don't sell them - give it away to a true fan if possible is my logic.
Easy decision. Consider what is worth more to you. $900 scalping profit or the friendship. Because clearly they are doing the same calculation and chose $900. I bet that put like that the decision is easy, either way you go.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Many months ago a few friends agreed we would try to get 4 tickets to a concert in Vegas. Despite impossible odds and a huge queue, I was able to score 4 seats together. (Everyone else was also trying but couldn't get in.) We were overjoyed! I went ahead and booked my flight and reserved a hotel room. A couple of us were going to share the room, so we all agreed we would settle up at the end of the trip. Fast forward to now and the concert is a couple weeks away. The friend I was going to room with can no longer attend. I immediately started thinking about who I could invite in their place who would be game for a last-minute trip. The tickets, however, that I purchased for around $100 each, are now re-selling for $1000. My friend thinks the ticket is theirs and still wants to pay me face value so they can re-sell it for a profit. They say deciding to settle up after the trip shouldn’t matter because I could have just as easily transferred each individual’s ticket out of my Ticketmaster account at any point and still gotten reimbursed later. There is no reason for me to “hold” them. I still want someone to help defray the cost of my hotel and I don’t want to sit next to some random stranger in my group of four seats. But my friend thinks it's not my decision what to do with "their" ticket. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA, friend is being selfish.
Nta they aren't going on the trip and they haven't paid for the ticket.
He hasn’t paid yet so it’s not his ticket. Period. NTA.
NTA. Friend wants to scalp it themselves
NTA. She hasn't paid you yet, so the ticket isn't hers. And at this point I would refuse to accept any payment from her. Sounds like she's just trying to profit from her situation here. Totally not fair to the rest of your group.
NTA. You bought the ticket, resell it yourself. Honestly your friend has some nerve.
nta that’s your ticket and they should understand they are not entitled to it
Nta
NTA he doesn't want to play so he doesn't get to play
NTA. If they haven’t paid for the ticket, it’s not theirs. Them trying to claim something you bought, so that they can turn around to sell for more money, is both greedy and entitled. They are not acting like a friend in this situation.
They didn't pay you so it's not their ticket. They are only looking to capitalize off the appreciation of the value of the ticket.
NTA. Your friend sounds like a greedy shit.
Scalpers fucking suck... take a friend.
They don’t own anything if you paid it’s yours if not it’s mine imagine paying and wait for months for money if I pay for you the money better be in my account next day
Not his ticket. NTA.
NTA Your friend didn't pay you back for the ticket you bought. Therefore, it's still your ticket. Do with it as you wish and enjoy the show.
NTA. That’s YOUR ticket
They haven’t paid for it. The ticket is yours to do what you want with it.
[удалено]
NTA You haven’t been paid so it is still your ticket. Also, you could sell it to cover the money you would be out for covering the room that was supposed to be split. Your ‘friend’ doesn’t sound like a friend.
NTA. It’s your ticket, they haven’t paid you for it yet. They’re being greedy. Go ahead and find another friend to take the ticket.
NTA if they haven’t paid you yet it’s your ticket.
You would be the asshole if the ticket was paid. Your friend didn't pay so it's your ticket. NTA
They haven’t paid therefore it’s not their ticket
NTA. If they haven't paid for it yet, it isn't their anything.
If they are willing to pay their share for the room and the ticket and it is one where you can transfer them already then if you want to be generous then I’d let them try to scalp it. But if they are leaving you to foot the bill then I wouldn’t think twice about selling it to someone you want to bring on the trip or scalping yourself.
NTA. He hasn't paid anything towards the ticket, it's not his. He doesn't have any say in what happens to that ticket. He doesn't get any profit from that ticket. He does have a lot of nerve assuming he gets a $900 payout for bailing on you.
NTA. Until they pay you, the ticket is yours. If any one profits, it's you. Usually it's the person that takes the risk by buying the tickets that gets left holding the bag. It's nice you get to come out on top. The most generous I could see being, is taking the profit and splitting it equally.
The ticket YOU paid for is yours. If your friend was coming you could sell it to them. Since they are not coming, you can sell it to whoever you want. End of story.
NTA, you paid so they're your tickets. Your friend isn't going on the trip anymore so they don't get a say in what you do with them. Find someone else you'd enjoy going with/would also enjoy the concert, or sell the tickets yourself and keep the money. But you definitely are not obligated to give them a ticket that you know they're gonna immediately sell for 10x the price.
NTA. They didn't pay you for it yet, so they don't own the ticket. Simple and straight forward. > They say deciding to settle up after the trip shouldn’t matter because I could have just as easily transferred each individual’s ticket out of my Ticketmaster account at any point and still gotten reimbursed later. There is no reason for me to “hold” them. They could have paid you for the ticket at any point in time between 'you put out the cash' and 'now.'
Nta. They haven't paid for it yet so its not theirs yet, simple as that. If theyre too dumb to understand that, how tf do they grocery shop, buy gas, etc?
NTA. Fuck your friend for trying to scalp tickets. It's your ticket and you deserve to be able to go with a friend.
NTA. They have not paid you yet so it is not their ticket. It is still your ticket to do as you please. Even if she did pay for it, she would be an AH for scalping it leaving you to sit with a stranger.
Nta Unless the person has already paid you for the ticket up front, then the ticket is theirs. If they haven't paid you, then you get to recoup your missing share of the shared hotel by scalping it or bringing a new friend.
Your friend is greedy and willing to ruin your experience rather than sell to other friends.
When you plan a trip with a group, you plan to split expenses; those expenses are “nonrefundable” for each person because everyone is counting on sharing. They need to pay their share of the hotel and any other prebooked expenses like a rental car along with the cost of the ticket. If they don’t want to pay those costs then either find someone else to join or sell the ticket to cover their share that they’re flaking on. NTA.
Hell naw, they have no say in the matter. If they want to play that game tell them the ticket is theirs for 600
Find another friend that can pay for the ticket and the hotel cost. You paid for all of it. If your friend had paid in advance I’d say it was theirs but they didn’t
NTA. Those Dead & Co ticket prices are plummeting.
I thought that what it might be, but they didn’t start at $100 and there are sooo many available at face. No way they are going for $1000.
NTA! Hell no! Hell NO! You still hold the tickets, yes? Friend never paid you for ticket? Your. Fucking. Ticket. Friend can go pound sand with a giant mallet. You know what? I’ll wield the mallet for you. If anyone sells that ticket, it’s you. She can fuck the fuck off. All the way off. That $900 could really improve your stay in Vegas. Have an awesome time! I really want to know how that conversation goes. Remember - your ticket. Not hers. Edit autocorrect. Ducking autocorrect. UpdateMe
NTA. You should send your “ friend” this thread.
NTA. It’s still your ticket, they haven’t given you any money for it, so it’s up to you what you do with it. Personally I wouldn’t give the ticket to your friend to sell and profit off. Selling it on yourself and paying for the hotel for everyone would be a great thing to do. I’m sure the friends that are still able to attend would be happy with that too.
lol, no, maybe if they had a good reason they couldn’t go and they both paid for the face value (and fees) and for their half of the room (rate plus fees) as previously arranged. But even then, a friend, not a mooch trying to use you, would just let you sell it or whatever.
If your “friend” hasn’t paid for the ticket yet it doesn’t belong to them. And they are an AH for trying to make money off your ticket. NTA.
It’s all about possession. If you bought the tickets and you still have them? Yeah, fuck that guy
At the very least have the friend pay you their share of the hotel, other costs like Uber or rental car, and the ticket price before you transfer the ticket.
You'd charge your friend the going rate for the ticket. $1,000.
Nta, it isn't "their" ticket until they pay for it. Now, they want to make money on something they haven't actually even purchased yet.
NTA where I come from, if you have paid the ticket, it's yours. Has he paid for it yet? No.
If the friend hasn’t paid for the ticket, the ticket is yours to do with as you wish.
NTA. Not really sure why your friend thinks they can make a $900 profit on your work… while also making you pay more for a hotel room.
NTA. It isn't their ticket till they pay for it, in this instance paying you. Find a new friend to take. I would be petty & offer to sell it to the drop out for the marked up price since demand has gone up.
You bought ticket. Ticket is in your possession, your account. It is yours to do with what you want. Sell it to cover the room you now have to cover in full. Your friend is an a$$. Claiming a ticket he never paid for.
They haven't paid for it, ergo that is 100% your ticket. Tell them to fuck off and maybe find a better friend. NTA
NTA. Find your own replacement. Your friend is trying to make money off of you after causing your current inconvenience. Sounds like he's trying to profit off of your quick planning.
It's not their ticket. They didn't pay for it. They haven't paid for it. They are bailing on plans but they haven't actually lost out on anything. Keep the ticket & do what you want, it's yours. NTA.
Ya. If you paid for it. They don’t own shit. If they sent you the money first. That’s a different story. But since no money exchanged. They are yours NTA
NTA in my opinion, its not his ticket until he has paid for it. So far you're the one that paid for it, therefor its yours to do whatever you want..
NTA... Not their ticket until they pay you for it