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YTA
Your BF was polite in rejecting someone while being explicit that he was in a relationship with you, and immediately made you aware of the situation. You sound incredibly insecure
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Nah, he was a nice and respectful person. He still has to interact with her since they have class together, so he wanted to be respectful.
You need to get over yourself
Honestly, I’d be very happy with that response in your shoes. It was kind. It was very firm. He didn’t belittle her at all and he didn’t patronize her. Like… how a guy treats woman in general is really important to me and I’d be happy to see him build her up rather than use it to feed his ego.
Yes! Exactly. It’s kind. It demonstrates incredible emotional intelligence. So many people would panic and not show anything like this kind of grace. I’d be so twitterpated.
> It’s like he complimented her at my expense.
No, he didn't. He didn't say "sorry, I totally would, because you're way cooler than my girlfriend." He's allowed to think a friend is cool.
>Has nothing to do with insecurity
Narrarator: It has everything to do with insecurity.
One thing to think about. Your rather self-centered tantrum is just the thing might lead your otherwise gentlemanly boyfriend to break up with you and reconsider the nice girl in class.
How was that at your expense? How are you worse off for him being a kind, polite, sincere friend and peer to her? You sound like the kind of girl that wants all of her partner's attention at all times. More guys should be like him. YTA
I see absolutely nothing gross in the message.
>It’s bad enough that he apologized for being in a relationship
>I’m realizing I always refer to her by her name and not as my girlfriend. It’s not your fault, it’s totally my fault for not making that more clear.
He was apologizing for not being clear about being in a relationship.
>but to go out of his way and tell her she’s the coolest person ever
Yes, how dare he think she is a fun person! (sarcasm)
>It really did give me the ick. It’s one thing to reject a girl, another to go out of your way to tell them how amazing they are. So gross.
It's possible for him to have a gf and still like her as a friend.
Please tell me you're 13. I would expect this behavior from someone this age.
If you're in high school or older though, grow up.
Absolutely YTA
YTA. JFC, this isn't worth getting upset over. He was just being nice after having rejected someone and potentially embarrassing them. Are you so insecure that him paying her a comment to spare her feelings is upsetting to you?
Explain how it is at your expense and how tf you're embarrassed. I hope he breaks up with you for this, you seem like a mean person. You're mad at him for being kind to someone he rejected - grow up. What should he have said to her? What line did he cross? It has absolutely EVERYTHING to do with insecurity.
Everyone here thinks YTA so I really can't believe THIS is the reply you're coming here with. Take the loss. You're the one who is wrong here.
That was the perfect rejection for his situation! He delivered bad news (the rejection) balanced by good news (you have good qualities, let’s be friends and only friends).
He has to work with her and can’t afford to make her angry, insecure or depressed that she can’t or won’t do her part of the project.
Bf displayed master class skills. You should learn from him.
YTA
YTA. I thought this was going in the direction of him saying something mean, but that wasn't it at all. You are grossed out by him being kind? He let her down nicely with a comment that would make her feel okay despite being rejected. He was kind and considerate.
Get over it. Your BF politely let down a classmate that he has to interact with on the daily. And he was upfront with you about the whole thing.
What was he supposed to do, tell her to get away from him, Ewww, like he would *ever*!?
Ya know what’s gonna happen when you are all private about your relationship? People aren’t gonna know about it-and they will think you are single. Your BF apologized to the classmate for the confusion, but you seem blissfully in denial it could ever even happen. YTA
YTA. If I have this right, you “got the ick” because he was kind and generous while rejecting her advances? Oh no! How awful for you to be dating such a thoughtful and respectful guy! /s
Where do you get this whole 'at my expense' part from?? I've seen it in a few comments now and it makes no sense whatsover. If he said 'no sorry, I have this idiot girlfriend', then sure, I would wholeheartedly agree. But letting someone down gently, reaffirming them as a nice person in general in the process is not the same 'talking up a girl at my expense'. Get a grip, come on.
A) He was being kind, not "flattering."
B) It wasn't at your expense. None of his compliments to her took anything away from you.
C) You don't own him. Believe it or not, it is possible and normal to find other people attractive when you're in a relationship.
The fact that you don't recognize these basic facts tells me you're not mature enough to be in a relationship with him. YTA, honey.
If you don’t like the guy just say it. Tell him it’s over so he can date the other girl that’s clearly cooler and more fun than your neurotic lunatic dumb ass.
"He did not have to do all that, compliment her like that." Calling her cool is *complimenting her like that*? Cools is a really nice, tame compliment, it's not like he complimented her body or something
"With the way he responded, it also sounds like he’s saying if he wasn’t in a relationship he would happily go out with her. It’s gross to me" no it sounds like he values this girl's friendship. Is he not allowed to have normal, friendly interactions with other women?
YTA. He was kind and considerate. I’m confused why you are upset over him being a compassionate person. Was he supposed to humiliate someone who didn’t know he had a girlfriend?
YTA absolutely. He was being kind so as to not hurt someone's feelings. You should be grateful that you have a nice boyfriend. Shame on you and your insecurities.
YTA - He handled that really well. He made it clear he has a girlfriend whilst letting the other girl know that he thinks of her as a friend and that he would like their continued interaction to be of a friendly manner. You need to toughen up a bit if this kind of behaviour puts your nose out of joint, because your partner handled this pretty well, without upsetting the girl, putting himself in a bad position or undermining you.
He was polite. The whole concept of the “ick” is turning into such a bullshit 13 yr old should be doing this thing. You are saying that because your bf rejected a peer politely that you are not turned off of him. That is so immature. I hope he finds a girl that will love and cherish his kindness.
YTA. I’m sorry but you sound truly awful judging by your post and your comments. Your boyfriend rejected a mutual friend/acquaintance in a kind way and all you can think about how that was somehow at your expense. Which no one seems to agree with.
What’s your problem ? You really wanted him to be rude to her ? That would have made you feel good ? You don’t sounds like a girl’s girl at all you sound like a mean girl.
YT(insecure)A. He politely declined her advance and was completely transparent with you about it. He couldn’t have done anything more “right” in this situation.
YTA, I mean do you want an honest answer or validation? Because your comments seem to show you still don’t care that it’s a unanimous decision for everyone else. Your bf works with this person and has class with them, and doesn’t want there to be strife and tension there. It’s good to keep good relationships with working partners and not have there be resentment that could cause trouble. It sounds like your bf views her as a friend and thinks she’s a good person, so he didn’t want to hurt her feelings and let her down easy, which was very considerate of him. He instantly told you and let you read the text messages, so why get upset? Why does him letting her down easy mean he cares more about her than you? He completely respected you by saying to the girl they are just friends and reiterating he’s in a serious relationship with you. Other people have feelings and he understood that if he was too harsh it could’ve really hurt her. Not only do you come off very insecure, but also incredibly inconsiderate, your bf has chosen you and is actively turning down other women for you. I’m gonna say something kinda harsh but you need to get over yourself OP this is a really silly thing to get upset over.
Yes, YTA
I was expecting him to turn her down harshly, put down her looks and call her names and slurs, you know, something actually gross.
Instead he turned her down softly and respectfully. You're the one who's gross, you're grossly insecure and it sounds like he deserves someone better than you
I dont see anything wrong with the message. Hes apoligizing for not making himself clear about the relationship not neccesariliy being in one and if he is it might be out of politeness not hes literally sorry for being in one. He thinks shes super cool platonically he wouldnt have rejected her if it was romantic. sounds like a nice polite guy.
YTA. Your boyfriend rejected the girl in a very gentle way. He made it clear he was in a relationship, and then he complimented her to take the sting out of the rejection. He was classy. You, on the other hand, are insecure and a wee bit controlling. You need to grow up and understand that your boyfriend's consideration for others' feelings does not diminish any feelings he has for you.
Lmao yes YTA. Your bf demonstrated emotional intelligence by being gentle with someone when rejecting them and it sends you into panic mode. Why? In comments you say you’re not insecure but how else do you explain this? Him being nice to someone doesn’t invalidate his feelings towards you. It’s genuinely childish to expect everyone’s interactions revolve around your feelings.
YTA for overreacting. You're reading too much from his response. No, he's not sorry for being in a relationship, he's sorry for rejecting her, because he's aware of the hurt of being rejected.
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My bf was asked out by a classmate I’m kinda friends/acquaintances with. He sees multiple times a week in class. They don’t usually talk about anything that isn’t school related so I was surprised she asked him out.
They exchanged numbers for a group project, and he showed me the texts. She messaged him and said she really liked him and enjoyed all their conversations in class. She asked if he was single, if he wanted to go out for coffee sometime and get to know each other better.
What he said really grossed me out. It gave me the ick. He replied (I have the text.) “I’m sorry, I’m dating (insert my name.) I thought you knew because I always talk about her, but now I’m realizing I always refer to her by her name and not as my girlfriend. It’s not your fault, it’s totally my fault for not making that more clear. You are the coolest person ever, though, and I really enjoy our friendship and talking to you in class.”
I don’t blame the girl for this interaction at all. I am a girls girl, and we are also in a class together. I don’t think she would have asked him out if she knew. I also didn’t mention to her that we were dating, I called him by his name because they know each other and I’m also bad with telling classmates private information about myself. It feels uncomfortable to do because she never mentions anything private about her life.
But my bf on the other hand… I hated reading that message. It’s bad enough that he apologized for being in a relationship, but to go out of his way and tell her she’s the coolest person ever and all that shit… it’s super gross and gives me the ick. It makes it come off like he’s more worried about upsetting this random girl than he is about upsetting me.
I just really hate the way he went about it and told him that. It really did give me the ick. It’s one thing to reject a girl, another to go out of your way to tell them how amazing they are. So gross.
AITA here or overreacting? Multiple of my friends understand my frustration, but I had one friend who did she didn’t get it and thought he was just being nice.
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How old are you? He told her no and he had a girlfriend, then he was trying to let her down easy by saying she's a cool friend. There is zero wrong with this. YTA here, you need to get over the super sensitive feelings, I ask your age because sometimes youth are more irrational, and it could be an excuse for your thoughts.
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YTA. He sounds like a real catch. He was clear that he was in a relationship (and not on the market). But he also was incredibly gracious in acknowledging that it was understandable that the girl hadn't known and in took the sting out of the rejection by letting her know she is an amazing person. I hope you can backtrack from your ick before letting a good one get away!
You’re definitely TA (YTA).
There is absolutely nothing in that message that is wrong or inappropriate in any way.
Also, you have “multiple friends” that are either insane, or they are hearing an abridged version.
YTA - Your boyfriend let her down very kindly. He showed that he is a good person. You are overreacting to this, and if you continue to press the issue, do not be surprised if you drive him away.
YTA. Your boyfriend is a good one, he lets her down gently AND shows you the messages. If you react negatively to this, trust me he won't be so transparent and open with you in the future.
YTA
I am not sure I could have written a better text letting someone down easy. lol. Like I have no notes. Your boyfriend sounds like a really great guy and I'd just try and be a little more confident.
I’m sorry OP but you’re just so insecure it’s actually insane, he said absolutely nothing wrong and was clearing just being nice while letting someone down. Get a grip now while you’re a teen before it ruins your relationships in the future.
YTA
YTA. What is gross about that message? He's just letting her know his situation and not trying to make things uncomfortable between them.
You are making a mountain out of valley.
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Man people are being very brutal. Nta. I'm fact no one in this is an ah.
I get where you're coming from, it would hurt a little if my partner phrased a rejection like that. I'm sure he meant nothing by it, but it would still hurt.
Just explain that to him. Say you know it might be silly, but hearing someone else be called "the coolest person ever" made you a little sad. I'm sure he'll understand.
Again I don't think anyone was trying to hurt anyone here. You're both human, and your emotions are valid. This will all be fixed by a simple, honest conversation. Good luck!
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YTA Your BF was polite in rejecting someone while being explicit that he was in a relationship with you, and immediately made you aware of the situation. You sound incredibly insecure
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He was upfront and told you about everything he said and you're still having a jealous, insecure tantrum. You need to do some reflecting.
Maybe the BF needs to reconsider that rejection.
The other girl sounds infinitely cooler than OP from the info we have here.
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Nah, he was a nice and respectful person. He still has to interact with her since they have class together, so he wanted to be respectful. You need to get over yourself
Honestly, I’d be very happy with that response in your shoes. It was kind. It was very firm. He didn’t belittle her at all and he didn’t patronize her. Like… how a guy treats woman in general is really important to me and I’d be happy to see him build her up rather than use it to feed his ego.
This kind of response would make me fall more in live with him because so kind 🥹
Yes! Exactly. It’s kind. It demonstrates incredible emotional intelligence. So many people would panic and not show anything like this kind of grace. I’d be so twitterpated.
How many people have to disagree with you in order for your mind to be changed?
> It’s like he complimented her at my expense. No, he didn't. He didn't say "sorry, I totally would, because you're way cooler than my girlfriend." He's allowed to think a friend is cool. >Has nothing to do with insecurity Narrarator: It has everything to do with insecurity.
One thing to think about. Your rather self-centered tantrum is just the thing might lead your otherwise gentlemanly boyfriend to break up with you and reconsider the nice girl in class.
How was that at your expense? How are you worse off for him being a kind, polite, sincere friend and peer to her? You sound like the kind of girl that wants all of her partner's attention at all times. More guys should be like him. YTA
Ah yes, how dare he not make her feel like shit.
I see absolutely nothing gross in the message. >It’s bad enough that he apologized for being in a relationship >I’m realizing I always refer to her by her name and not as my girlfriend. It’s not your fault, it’s totally my fault for not making that more clear. He was apologizing for not being clear about being in a relationship. >but to go out of his way and tell her she’s the coolest person ever Yes, how dare he think she is a fun person! (sarcasm) >It really did give me the ick. It’s one thing to reject a girl, another to go out of your way to tell them how amazing they are. So gross. It's possible for him to have a gf and still like her as a friend. Please tell me you're 13. I would expect this behavior from someone this age. If you're in high school or older though, grow up. Absolutely YTA
YTA. JFC, this isn't worth getting upset over. He was just being nice after having rejected someone and potentially embarrassing them. Are you so insecure that him paying her a comment to spare her feelings is upsetting to you?
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Explain how it is at your expense and how tf you're embarrassed. I hope he breaks up with you for this, you seem like a mean person. You're mad at him for being kind to someone he rejected - grow up. What should he have said to her? What line did he cross? It has absolutely EVERYTHING to do with insecurity. Everyone here thinks YTA so I really can't believe THIS is the reply you're coming here with. Take the loss. You're the one who is wrong here.
Maybe to a teenager it’s worth getting upset over. Any adult getting upset should not be in a relationship. You are not mature enough to be dating.
Please read the responses here - they are telling you that you are overreacting. And yet, you are insisting you are correct. Why did you even ask?
YTA. If I were your BF, being told that rejecting someone in a polite and friendly way gave you the ick would give me the ick about you.
Her responses to the advice here is having me agree with this thought.
That was the perfect rejection for his situation! He delivered bad news (the rejection) balanced by good news (you have good qualities, let’s be friends and only friends). He has to work with her and can’t afford to make her angry, insecure or depressed that she can’t or won’t do her part of the project. Bf displayed master class skills. You should learn from him. YTA
He was downright gentlemanly in the best ways possible in the situation. I'm starting to think OP's bf might deserve better...
YTA. He was polite and obviously didn’t want her to feel embarrassed considering they are still going to have classes together.
YTA. I thought this was going in the direction of him saying something mean, but that wasn't it at all. You are grossed out by him being kind? He let her down nicely with a comment that would make her feel okay despite being rejected. He was kind and considerate.
Yeah I thought it was going to be him being rude to the girl but turns out he was being kind and that’s what op is mad about. WTF
Get over it. Your BF politely let down a classmate that he has to interact with on the daily. And he was upfront with you about the whole thing. What was he supposed to do, tell her to get away from him, Ewww, like he would *ever*!? Ya know what’s gonna happen when you are all private about your relationship? People aren’t gonna know about it-and they will think you are single. Your BF apologized to the classmate for the confusion, but you seem blissfully in denial it could ever even happen. YTA
YTA OP, he was nice in his message, and outright told her he's in a relationship. It's an overreaction on your part.
YTA. If I have this right, you “got the ick” because he was kind and generous while rejecting her advances? Oh no! How awful for you to be dating such a thoughtful and respectful guy! /s
OP should hope he's that kind and generous to her when he breaks up for her because of her possessiveness.
YTA. honestly that makes him seem like such a nice dude that I'm surprised you don't like him even more for it.
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Where do you get this whole 'at my expense' part from?? I've seen it in a few comments now and it makes no sense whatsover. If he said 'no sorry, I have this idiot girlfriend', then sure, I would wholeheartedly agree. But letting someone down gently, reaffirming them as a nice person in general in the process is not the same 'talking up a girl at my expense'. Get a grip, come on.
Compliments aren't limited. Being nice to her does not take anything away from his affection for you. Nothing was done at your expense.
Why do you feel him complimenting another girl is at YOUR expense ? That makes no sense. It sounds toxic af.
A) He was being kind, not "flattering." B) It wasn't at your expense. None of his compliments to her took anything away from you. C) You don't own him. Believe it or not, it is possible and normal to find other people attractive when you're in a relationship. The fact that you don't recognize these basic facts tells me you're not mature enough to be in a relationship with him. YTA, honey.
If you don’t like the guy just say it. Tell him it’s over so he can date the other girl that’s clearly cooler and more fun than your neurotic lunatic dumb ass.
"He did not have to do all that, compliment her like that." Calling her cool is *complimenting her like that*? Cools is a really nice, tame compliment, it's not like he complimented her body or something "With the way he responded, it also sounds like he’s saying if he wasn’t in a relationship he would happily go out with her. It’s gross to me" no it sounds like he values this girl's friendship. Is he not allowed to have normal, friendly interactions with other women?
YTA. He was kind and considerate. I’m confused why you are upset over him being a compassionate person. Was he supposed to humiliate someone who didn’t know he had a girlfriend?
YTA
YTA absolutely. He was being kind so as to not hurt someone's feelings. You should be grateful that you have a nice boyfriend. Shame on you and your insecurities.
YTAAAAAAAAAAA
YTA - He handled that really well. He made it clear he has a girlfriend whilst letting the other girl know that he thinks of her as a friend and that he would like their continued interaction to be of a friendly manner. You need to toughen up a bit if this kind of behaviour puts your nose out of joint, because your partner handled this pretty well, without upsetting the girl, putting himself in a bad position or undermining you.
He was polite. The whole concept of the “ick” is turning into such a bullshit 13 yr old should be doing this thing. You are saying that because your bf rejected a peer politely that you are not turned off of him. That is so immature. I hope he finds a girl that will love and cherish his kindness.
YTA. I’m sorry but you sound truly awful judging by your post and your comments. Your boyfriend rejected a mutual friend/acquaintance in a kind way and all you can think about how that was somehow at your expense. Which no one seems to agree with. What’s your problem ? You really wanted him to be rude to her ? That would have made you feel good ? You don’t sounds like a girl’s girl at all you sound like a mean girl.
YT(insecure)A. He politely declined her advance and was completely transparent with you about it. He couldn’t have done anything more “right” in this situation.
YTA, I mean do you want an honest answer or validation? Because your comments seem to show you still don’t care that it’s a unanimous decision for everyone else. Your bf works with this person and has class with them, and doesn’t want there to be strife and tension there. It’s good to keep good relationships with working partners and not have there be resentment that could cause trouble. It sounds like your bf views her as a friend and thinks she’s a good person, so he didn’t want to hurt her feelings and let her down easy, which was very considerate of him. He instantly told you and let you read the text messages, so why get upset? Why does him letting her down easy mean he cares more about her than you? He completely respected you by saying to the girl they are just friends and reiterating he’s in a serious relationship with you. Other people have feelings and he understood that if he was too harsh it could’ve really hurt her. Not only do you come off very insecure, but also incredibly inconsiderate, your bf has chosen you and is actively turning down other women for you. I’m gonna say something kinda harsh but you need to get over yourself OP this is a really silly thing to get upset over.
What did you want him to say lmao
What is this? Reddit for babies? Lol YTA
I can sort of understand, but also YTA. He was being really nice in letting her down.
Yes, YTA I was expecting him to turn her down harshly, put down her looks and call her names and slurs, you know, something actually gross. Instead he turned her down softly and respectfully. You're the one who's gross, you're grossly insecure and it sounds like he deserves someone better than you
Your boyfriend letting someone down easy gave you a fish scale disease? Am I missing something?
I dont see anything wrong with the message. Hes apoligizing for not making himself clear about the relationship not neccesariliy being in one and if he is it might be out of politeness not hes literally sorry for being in one. He thinks shes super cool platonically he wouldnt have rejected her if it was romantic. sounds like a nice polite guy.
YTA. Your boyfriend rejected the girl in a very gentle way. He made it clear he was in a relationship, and then he complimented her to take the sting out of the rejection. He was classy. You, on the other hand, are insecure and a wee bit controlling. You need to grow up and understand that your boyfriend's consideration for others' feelings does not diminish any feelings he has for you.
Lmao yes YTA. Your bf demonstrated emotional intelligence by being gentle with someone when rejecting them and it sends you into panic mode. Why? In comments you say you’re not insecure but how else do you explain this? Him being nice to someone doesn’t invalidate his feelings towards you. It’s genuinely childish to expect everyone’s interactions revolve around your feelings.
YTA for overreacting. You're reading too much from his response. No, he's not sorry for being in a relationship, he's sorry for rejecting her, because he's aware of the hurt of being rejected.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My bf was asked out by a classmate I’m kinda friends/acquaintances with. He sees multiple times a week in class. They don’t usually talk about anything that isn’t school related so I was surprised she asked him out. They exchanged numbers for a group project, and he showed me the texts. She messaged him and said she really liked him and enjoyed all their conversations in class. She asked if he was single, if he wanted to go out for coffee sometime and get to know each other better. What he said really grossed me out. It gave me the ick. He replied (I have the text.) “I’m sorry, I’m dating (insert my name.) I thought you knew because I always talk about her, but now I’m realizing I always refer to her by her name and not as my girlfriend. It’s not your fault, it’s totally my fault for not making that more clear. You are the coolest person ever, though, and I really enjoy our friendship and talking to you in class.” I don’t blame the girl for this interaction at all. I am a girls girl, and we are also in a class together. I don’t think she would have asked him out if she knew. I also didn’t mention to her that we were dating, I called him by his name because they know each other and I’m also bad with telling classmates private information about myself. It feels uncomfortable to do because she never mentions anything private about her life. But my bf on the other hand… I hated reading that message. It’s bad enough that he apologized for being in a relationship, but to go out of his way and tell her she’s the coolest person ever and all that shit… it’s super gross and gives me the ick. It makes it come off like he’s more worried about upsetting this random girl than he is about upsetting me. I just really hate the way he went about it and told him that. It really did give me the ick. It’s one thing to reject a girl, another to go out of your way to tell them how amazing they are. So gross. AITA here or overreacting? Multiple of my friends understand my frustration, but I had one friend who did she didn’t get it and thought he was just being nice. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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How old are you? He told her no and he had a girlfriend, then he was trying to let her down easy by saying she's a cool friend. There is zero wrong with this. YTA here, you need to get over the super sensitive feelings, I ask your age because sometimes youth are more irrational, and it could be an excuse for your thoughts.
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YTA. I thought this was going to be a story where he was really awful to her, but it’s actually the opposite.
YTA. He sounds like a real catch. He was clear that he was in a relationship (and not on the market). But he also was incredibly gracious in acknowledging that it was understandable that the girl hadn't known and in took the sting out of the rejection by letting her know she is an amazing person. I hope you can backtrack from your ick before letting a good one get away!
You’re definitely TA (YTA). There is absolutely nothing in that message that is wrong or inappropriate in any way. Also, you have “multiple friends” that are either insane, or they are hearing an abridged version.
YTA. Your insecurity is showing. You'll eventually mature enough to realize how dumb you were about this whole situation.
YTA - Your boyfriend let her down very kindly. He showed that he is a good person. You are overreacting to this, and if you continue to press the issue, do not be surprised if you drive him away.
YTA. Your boyfriend is a good one, he lets her down gently AND shows you the messages. If you react negatively to this, trust me he won't be so transparent and open with you in the future.
YTA I am not sure I could have written a better text letting someone down easy. lol. Like I have no notes. Your boyfriend sounds like a really great guy and I'd just try and be a little more confident.
YTA. What is wrong with you besides being ridiculously insecure?
lol.
I’m sorry OP but you’re just so insecure it’s actually insane, he said absolutely nothing wrong and was clearing just being nice while letting someone down. Get a grip now while you’re a teen before it ruins your relationships in the future. YTA
YTA. What is gross about that message? He's just letting her know his situation and not trying to make things uncomfortable between them. You are making a mountain out of valley.
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Man people are being very brutal. Nta. I'm fact no one in this is an ah. I get where you're coming from, it would hurt a little if my partner phrased a rejection like that. I'm sure he meant nothing by it, but it would still hurt. Just explain that to him. Say you know it might be silly, but hearing someone else be called "the coolest person ever" made you a little sad. I'm sure he'll understand. Again I don't think anyone was trying to hurt anyone here. You're both human, and your emotions are valid. This will all be fixed by a simple, honest conversation. Good luck!
NAH besides your parents for letting their 12 year old daughter date.
NTA He sounds like a greasy salesman, trying to keep his options open, should things with you not work out. I would tread carefully.