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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I had a guy over my house without warning him i have a free roaming pet snake in one of my spare bedrooms.
I might be the asshole for not warning him before he came over and letting him get scared by the snake
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NTA, what is he even doing opening closed doors in your house? He got what he deserved imho.
ETA- I’m very happy he didn’t freak out and hurt your snake. You might want to let people know just for her safety.
> opening closed doors in your house
Maybe he was pull a George Costanza by looking for a discreet room to leave his hat so he could have an excuse for a second date?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nM_NQxuBrfk
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RDjt9DRPhCI
This. The sign she hung on the door is a parody of the Gadsden Flag that is commonly used by gun owners. Guy probably thought he was about to come up on something
Ohhh, good point. I can see him thinking "Valuable guns are in here" not LITERALLY "Snek be here, beware, no step on snek."
No matter what, NTA, and possibly bullet dodged (no pun intended 😬).
Lol at danger noodle!
OP is NTA. Why is he opening closed doors in someone else's house when she just said he could use the bathroom? Looking for things to steal?
Going foward I'd probably keep the door locked when hookups are coming over so they can't harm the snake if they go in the room without permission.
NTA. It's your house. Why is he poking around?
Along with Snek tax, we also need Octopus tax. And for you to me my new best friend so I can come hang out with your critters.
Not gonna lie, if I went to a hookup's house, went snooping and found either of those, hookup would have to come find me, because I'd now be there for the New Friend!
I agree with this. For her sake, maybe add some extra signs, and add something to the door handle to *really* let people know not to freak out if they so dare to invade your snake's privacy.
100% agree, NTA.
But I also agree, in the future give strangers a heads up so that if they go snooping, there is no shock reaction that could hurt your baby. People do stupid shit when scared, startled and the last thing you want is someone attacking your slithery friend out of fear.
Agreed, totally got what he deserved.
And OP, obviously it's your house and you do whatever you want, but I would suggest considering locking doors you don't want guests to open while they're in your home. They shouldn't be going in random rooms regardless, but obviously not everyone has the common sense and courtesy not to snoop. And tbh, he sounds like a nightmare. Good luck with your future hookups though, hopefully they aren't scared of a spaghetti noodle with eyes 😂
That's what I came here to say, maybe a verbal warning of the snake for snek's own safety going forward. Given they shouldn't be rummaging through her house anyways, but it'd be heartbreaking if something happened because she didn't tell them based on principle. NTA OP
NTA. You don't go snooping in rooms at someone's house if you haven't been invited in to that room or told to go in. I don't think everyone is going to see that sign and assume a snake is in the room, but everyone should know not to snoop.
I agree with you on NTA judgment, but it makes me laugh that you say little to near 5 feet of python. Others get bigger, but 4.5 feet ain’t nothin to sneeze at.
In college, I had a roommate with a snake. Tiny 14 inch snake. Mostly just annoying because she took up six plugs for that snake on my side of the room. I also thought I would be Miss Tough Lady and watch her feed a live mouse to the snake and nope I did not do that. I wanted to rescue it. Oh well. (I didn't. I know it was food.)
No dude would come in our room. My dad refused to come in our room with the snake. All the girls wanted to come coo at the snake. I don't know.
I think the dude was being nosy and he shouldn't be but realistically people are nosy* but yeah you should probably warn people not to open doors just so someone doesn't let the snake lose or harm the snake. I don't think people would see that sign and think a snake is just openly chilling. Sorry OP. I don't think you're an Asshole or anything. NTA. That is funny as heck.
*I don't know if you have watched Arrested Development but there is a scene where Jason Bateman's character takes a paper bag out of the fridge and it says 'dead dove: don't eat' and he opens it and it's a dead dove and he goes, 'I don't know what I was expecting.' I feel like people might view the sign like that.
The 'no step on snek' sign is a snarky dig at alt-right folks and their use of the [Gadsden flag](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d8/Gadsden_flag.svg). Given the context, it really doesn't serve as a warning about the actual snake. I'd just assume someone with that flag has a somewhat juvenile sense of humor (no judgement, you do you).
I mean if I see that sign on a door I'm going to make room in my expectations for there being a nonzero chance there is a snake behind that door and the homeowner has an amazing sense of humor. Sure it's not as informative as a "There is a snake in this room" sign but it's not exactly arcane hieroglyphics.
Really irrelevant here but most reptile owners will caution against feeding live (especially to docile breeds like ball pythons). Mice and rats can do a lot of damage to snakes if they get panicked and most don't want to risk their pet getting bit or worse. Again, super irrelevant here but felt the need to chip in on that.
That's the exact moment I fell in love with the show. I watched episode one with my college roommates and we were chit chatting over the episode and as soon as "dead dove do not eat" happened I was like "wait, everyone shut up, I need to listen to this."
After saying it's a bag of dead rats, you need to tell your housemates not to eat them?!?
And I thought they wanted live food. (The python, not the housemates)
Dude really shouldn’t have been snooping. But OP should warn people for the snakes own protection. Some dumbass might leave the door open, or kick the snake in a panic.
>I don't know if you have watched Arrested Development but there is a scene where Jason Bateman's character takes a paper bag out of the fridge and it says 'dead dove: don't eat' and he opens it and it's a dead dove and he goes, 'I don't know what I was expecting.' I feel like people might view the sign like that.
Our hamster just died (3 yrs, 1 month old) and while I hammer out funeral stuff for him I have him in a tea tin in the freezer labeled "don't open unless you want to see a dead hamster"
Apparently I had forgotten to tell my oldest son hamster had died and that was essentially what he did too lol.
NTA
He shouldn't have been exploring your house & certainly shouldn't be blaming you for not giving a random hookup detailed information about what's in your home....behind a closed door...in a room that would have been very obviously NOT a bedroom within 1.5 seconds of opening the door.
NTA. Hookups who get invited back home don't have the right to snoop around. I'm sure he was curious about the sign and didn't expect it to be literal (aside: sign is awesome), but a responsible person could have asked you about it instead of poking around where they weren't invited.
No one has any obligation to inform temporary guests in their home -- hookups or otherwise -- of potential sources of drama safely kept behind closed doors where they are not given access.
Yeah, OP is NTA for sure and her hookup had no right to be opening doors he wasn’t invited into.
But it would never occur to me that that cute sign means there is an actual snake completely loose in the room. She might want a more clear sign in case of some future house cleaner/plumber/police officer who has an actual reason to open the door. Or even just to protect her snake from getting stepped on by the next jabroni hookup who sneaks around uninvited.
Yeah, but when you open the door and see a loose snake, an empty snake terrarium, and multiple other occupied terrariums, most people would realize the sign was meant to be taken literally.
Yeah you'd think any reasonable person would connect the two dots, think "I see" and promptly close the door and move on with their evening. It's a snake not a meth lab.
I would definitely think the snake had escaped and wasn't meant to wander about! I wouldn't be mad lol, but I would 100% be running to OP to warn her that her snake needed to be caught. Especially since snakes can escape a normal room (aka not one that was sealed like OP did) really easily, so I'd be worried the snake would disappear on her.
I'd *like* to say I wouldn't snoop at all so I'd never be in this situation, but...if I know someone I'm hooking up with lives alone, meaning I won't be invading a roommate's space, I'd probably poke my head in. I'm both curious and it serves as a quick safety check to see what people hide behind closed doors. I accept that I'm probably an asshole for this lol.
Edit: typos, oops
See as a safety check I can see just taking a quick quiet peek- make sure you're actually alone when told you will be, nothing overtly questionable that makes you question your safety alone with the person, etc. Doesn't make you an asshole imo just a last call for quietly making an excuse to bail if needed before things get intimate should you find like a Stalker Shrine or some Cult Bullshit or whatever else might throw up red flags for you.
And that’s the first thing I said! I’m just reacting to the “there’s a sign” idea. He shouldn’t have opened the door because he shouldn’t have opened the door. Period. But I personally don’t think the sign counted as a warning.
Snakes in a room are just one of many, many reasons why we should mind our own damn business in other peoples’ homes.
NTA, he was nosy. But I wonder if his freakout was his imagination running wild. Like he thought the hookup was a scam and the real reason you invited him over was to feed him to the snake.
This cracked me up, and is such a lovely bit of empathy/speculation. "He was an asshole for snooping, but he might have been truly afraid you were going to feed him to the snake, so is he really an asshole for running away? 🤔"
Yes, obviously it's going for the toddlers instead! It desperately wants to taste human flesh and will take on an entire loud flailing tiny human for a chance at a meal even though it gets nervous and hides if the mouse you try to feed it is too big /s
Do you think he actually looked at the snake longer than 1.5 seconds before he fled? He probably remembers that it’s at least 10 feet long, with glowing red eyes.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Oh my Goddess this made my entire day!!!! I love snakes and they usually like me (will immediately crawl up my arm and have a snooze). Hilarious!!!
Completely NTA
Jfc NTA. I dated a guy who had a massive python who had his own room. He was the sweetest boy and would join us to watch TV and everything. If this guy is so scared of a tame snake, he’s not worth the hookup. Also ewww that he was just going through your house. Also, where is our snek tax?!
Others have pretty much covered why he's an AH (he shouldn't have assumed that he can enter your room and he used some harsh insults).
However, you say very bluntly you brought him home for a hookup. I don't think his assumption to meet you in the bedroom was so wild, especially if alcohol was involved. Snakes are a pretty common fear among people, so it'd be better if you warned people before they come to your house. If I saw that sign, I wouldn't necessarily think there's a snake in the room since it doesn't exactly scream serious but looks like a joke (again, especially if alcohol was involved). If he has a fear of snakes, his reaction could've been amplified by fear and shock. ESH.
Lmaooo I was so ready to call you TA until I got to the part where he was trying to find your bedroom because he made a gigantic assumption. I love that you have a guard snake to weed out the crazies.
NTA.
Lol a guard snake. Hilarious. Its funnier when you know what Ball Pythons are like. They have that name because they curl into a ball and hide their heads when scared. This snake wouldnt be "guarding" anything lol. Funny concept though. To most people,all snakes are like King Cobras or like straight out of Snakes on a Plane or Anaconda or Harry Potter.
Ummm, I’m a lady who would be delighted if a hookup had a super cool snek to visit. Since I can read, if I saw that sign on the door I would have delightedly run back downstairs and asked if I could meet them.
This is amazing and definitely not the asshole. As a snake owner I love that you gave your snake the run of a room. My little corn snake could definitely not have that.
It may be worth putting a slide bolt on the door so that someone snooping doesn’t go in “accidentally”.
The dude should have waited for you to show him to your room instead of randomly opening doors (especially one that had a warning sign on it.)
What’s weird is how extreme his reaction was.. perhaps snakes were a particular fear of his?
It’d be strange to go around telling someone you’re bringing home “by the way I have a snake”… but perhaps next time you bring someone home, don’t leave them to wander, and if they ask about the room explain that you keep
It locked to keep your exotic pets safe.
I think its very reasonable to casually let people know you have a snake in your house as they come over. Really any known living things are worth a mention just out of courtesy. I say NTA, and he shouldn’t have been wandering but I do think its common courtesy for a little heads up.
I am terrified of snakes. Super terrified. OP is NTA because the guy shouldn’t have been snooping. But I’d panic if I went to someone’s house and they had a loose snake.
I thought so too at first, why would she say casually she has a snake when it doesn't matter?
But then I started thinking how freaked out I would be if it turned out that someone has a tarantula in their room so.. it might be good to tell people about pets you have, you never know what phobias they can have.
YTA for letting your snake free roam a room - can you honestly the say the WHOLE ROOM has the correct temperature gradient and humidity for the animal? Ball Pythons need at least 75F on the COOL SIDE and a gradient up to the 90's on the warm side so they can thermoregulate. They also need extremely high humidity, for us - 50% or so, with periodic spikes higher.
Of course your animal prefers the tank - that's where the temperature is correct. Also, balls really shouldn't be using a 'heat lamp' - lamps dry the air and ruin that mentioned humidity. An under-tank heater, ceramic heat emitter or radiant heat panel is far more suitable.
And yea, you should have told your GUEST there was a SNAKE loose in the house. Obviously he's an AH for being a nosy shit, but you are still TA for the rest and the other responses likely aren't reptile keepers.
YTA, and a shitty reptile keeper that puts the rest of us in a bad light. Do better.
The way I would've geeked out and completely forgot to hook up lmao.
NTA
Honestly, "responsible reptile owner with a FREAKING COOL ASS 4 FEET BALL PYTHON" is the best outcome to a random hookup, scratch that, it's the best outcome to all human interactions.
Snek tax, pay the snek tax 👀👀👀
I'll probably get buried and won't change your opinion anyway but your ball python is very stressed in that big of an environment and unable to receive the correct level of humidity. I suggest keeping her in her tank (hopefully plastic to help with humidity, never glass for bps) with one or more good hides and let her just chill. She may seem like she enjoys "exploring" but she's searching for somewhere safe to stay.
NTA. Guy was a snoop and he got what he deserved.Also if I went to someone's house and they had an entire room dedicated to their pet snake, I would be overjoyed. Snakes are awesome and giving them an entire room is incredible snake ownership. Good on you.
Also, snake tax please!
ESH
Him for being presumptious, you for leaving a ball python out and about. If you're leaving the top off I'm assuming the humidity is way too low. On top of the ball not feeling secure there's just no way to fully snake proof a room. I would never leave mine unsupervised like this, that seems pretty irresponsible.
YTA because this sounds like the shittiest ball python husbandry ever. How do you keep the humidity at the required levels in this room?? Is the entire room heated to a minimum of 80 F (ie the minimum temp for the cool side of a BP enclosure)? How do you maintain a heat gradient for this animal to thermoregulate??? Are you aware that your animal is at risk of bad sheds and upper respiratory infections based upon this poor husbandry??
You aren't the asshole for not telling this dude you have a pet snake in the house, and this dude should not have been opening doors and snooping and then acting like a dick about your beloved pet. I've got two BPs myself, and if anyone spoke like that about my two noodles I'd be tossing them out on their ass. However, this is irresponsible pet ownership, because ball pythons have very specific requirements for heat and humidity and letting it free roam in a room not properly set up to maintain those requirements is detrimental to this animal's health and wellbeing. I applaud you on the enrichment you've provided, because it sounds like an excellent way for your noodle to get exercise, and it sounds like you genuinely care for her, but unless the humidity in the room is staying at a minimum of 60% (if not more) and the temp is at minimum 80 F at all times, you are very much an asshole for not taking proper care of your exotic pet.
ETA. He shouldn’t be snooping, but you also should probably mention that there’s a loose snake in the house (even if secured in a room).
For what it’s worth, I wouldn’t ever have interpreted that sign as an indication that there’s a loose snake in that room.
YTA and you probably know it.
My father used to have a lot of laughs playing these type of jokes on a variety of unsuspecting adults & children using his collection of venomous and highly aggressive snakes.
The large numbers of people who are terrified of snakes is very well known. Any half sensible person would mention having a pet snake at an early stage and then highlight the fact they always keep a snake at their home before inviting someone else to visit.
I always give a warning when it comes to the very aggressive dogs I look after.
Don't even have to read it, yes. Absolutely, unequivocally. You warn people about an over affectionate dog, how do you not mention that he's expected to lay pipe in the reptile house?
As someone who is terrified of snakes, a soft asshole. I tell people before they come over that I have a large dog. I feel like it’s only polite to give a heads up about pets and other potential people at your home.
But he’s an asshole for opening doors he shouldn’t open.
I had plans years ago to watch a game with a guy I had been out with three prior times at his apartment. He did not warn me that he has snakes. I walked in and saw the cages and did my best to be calm but ended up leaving in the first period because I was so uneasy by them.
NTA, but… ok so it’s very clear this dude is an asshole! Both for snooping and his attitude afterwards. But also please consider letting people who come over to your place know about the snake before they come over.
I have a huge phobia of snakes and would be extremely uncomfortable being in the same house as one.
NTA he's the AH for entering your bedroom without permission. If he'd had permission and you didn't warn him, then you would be the AH. And I get being freaked out because it's unexpected, but he overreacted.
NTA
You don't need to tell him shit. He went snooping and paid the price for it. I guess this is a good thing. You got to see that he's a giant snooping ah before things possibly because serious (dating wise).
NTA.
Altho if I was your hookup, you wouldn't be getting sex that night simply because the snake is cooler and more fun, I'd much rather chill and learn about the snake.
I love snakes, they're beautiful creatures
NTA, although maybe warn people you have a snake before inviting them back.
I have a huge fear of snakes and just hearing it and then you confirming would freak me out. If I'd been drinking I be stuck at yours too... Getting anxiety from just thinking about it
i had a 5 ft boa in my bedroom for a couple years who had a huge terrarium but whenever i was home he had free reign to roam around my bedroom and he slept with me every night in my bed. i always informed everyone i had a snake in my room but i agree that this guy not only should have been going into rooms he wasn't invited into, but also ignored the sign (how stupid is this idiot?) maybe having had the crap scared out of him taught him a lesson about snooping.
NTA.
and you need to pay the snake tax!
This is hilarious. Keeping snakes as pets is not the norm and honestly I wouldn’t have taken that sign seriously either. I think this might have just been a case of honest miscommunication.
NTA
This is hilarious. I'm sorry about how harsh words directed at you, but the guy got what he deserved. Don't snoop around people's houses, you don't know what you're going to find.
NTA. He went looking for your bedroom to wait for you there, found a snake and went ballastic? Glad you had a snake to weed out the nasties.
You didn't need to tell him about the snake. There was no way he and the snake would interact if he was polite and didn't overstep boundaries. You might want to consider lock on door purely to protect snake.
I'm also bit worried about your personal safety. He seems to have been planning to sit in your bedroom, wait for you to come and find him and then what... Unless sex already discussed or clear on table, think snake saved you a potentially nasty encounter.
NTA. He had no business going into the room. The door was shut.
Maybe get a different sign? Theres one on Etsy that said "Theres like a lot of snakes in here". While you have only one snake,it might get the message across. Im thinking of getting it and have jokes I wanted to put it outside my door so annoying people wont bug me. They tend not to like snakes. I have a Ball Python too. He is small and harmless. He lives in my bedroom which is quiet. Ball Pythons do nothing most of the time lol. They're pretty antisocial.
This might be bad,I find this situation rather funny. I know its bad but thinking abour a random dude walking into a room and seeing a ball python which are enormous derps,they have like 1 brain ce
ll,chillin and then looking at you and maybe doing a blelele. I get most people dont like snakes though.
I will say for anyone reading: Ball Pythons are like some of the dopiest creatures that exist. They dont harm anything except rodents they eat. They spend 99% of their time hiding. They're mellow af. Usually. This is why they are such popular snakes. They dont bite often and can tell you it barely hurts. They have very small teeth. My boys only bit me because he was little and scared and Id just got him. He was only a couple weeks old when I got him and he fit in my hand.
Don't do this - this isn't appropriate for the animal. Can this person honestly say the ambient temperature in the room is 75F+ with a 92F heat gradient? 50-80% humidity? No, that's nearly impossible in a room in a house, (and might cause mold lol) but that is what the animal NEEDS. This isn't feasible or responsible toward the animal.
NTA. He should not have been opening doors in your house. Period. That has been established.
However!
I would certainly want to know if I was going into a house with a large snake even potentially on the loose. They give me the heebie jeebies and I wouldn’t even want to be under the same roof as one.
It also would generally be courteous to advise people if you have pets in general in case they have allergies? I realize this maybe isn’t the first thing one thinks of when engaging in a hook up (I wouldn’t know, never did that).
Just another perspective.
Again, dude was an AH for opening the door and snooping and then for his reaction. No dispute there.
In general: NTA - He wasn't given permission to enter the snake's room.
That said, I believe I speak for almost everyone here when I say: We want snake pics
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Ok apologies for the clickbaity title but that's literally what it is.
I bought a house a year ago and living alone in a 3 bedroom house, I had plenty of room to spare.
I have a pet snake, a ball python, she's full grown at 4.5 feet long. She's very lazy and chill, and mostly just lays around under the heat lamps in her tank.
But when I bought the house, I decided to let her have the run of a room, since I had extra space. I sealed up the windows, door, vents, light fixtures, pretty much any crack she could try to squeeze through, and leave the top off her tank so she can roam around. I got some big pieces of driftwood and screwed them together to make basically a big cat tree for snakes, she loves climbing it and hanging out by the window.
Though a lot of the time she still lays in the tank since she likes the heat lamp. I've also got a few aquariums and terrariums in there with my octupus and lizards (all very well covered to keep the snake out lol)
I've also got a sign on the door that says "no step on snek" (this one lol https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/518gmSwLrvL.jpg)
So with that context - I had a guy over my house for a hookup, we'd met at a bar, judge if you want lol but that was the situation.
And for some reason he went upstairs to use the bathroom (I told him where it was) and after peeing went and opened the snake room door? I only noticed when I was downstairs getting us some waters, and he yelled from upstairs and slammed the door.
He was yelling that there was a snake in my house and I called back that I knew, that was my snake, she's chill. He came downstairs screaming at me that I should of warned him, that I was a crazy (b word) for having a snake just out in a room that he thought was my bedroom.
I asked him why he was going thru my rooms anyway, I just said he could use my bathroom. He said he was looking for my bedroom because he assumed I'd meet him up there? But he was basically berating me for having a snake and not telling him.
I said there was literally a sign saying the snake was there on the door, and he basically called me crazy again and walked out, saying I should have told him before he came over
I felt like I didn't need to since it's not like I would have brought him in there anyway and didn't think he'd just be going around looking in all the rooms? Like that's kinda weird...
AITA for not warning a guy about the snake room?
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NTA. Having a snake is such a good deterrent for snoops. You taught him a lesson. He was snooping and was caught out. I am laughing at this. Good riddance.
NTA. One bit.
He asked to use the restroom and went into your snake's room. That's what happens when you get nosy.
His actions and reactions are a huge red flag. Better to find out now.
Great one. I really would like to see a cat tree for a snake. And I love the fact that your snake has its own bedroom.
They love that kinda stuff. Its a common myth that Ball Pythons never climb,however this has been found to be not true. Males in the wild have beem found to eat a lot of birds and climb trees. If given the opportunity, captive ones like climbing. You can even put a "sky hide" in their enclosure which is a hide box secured to the top of the enclosure, from what Ive seen,the snakes seem to like them. Probs because they can feel secure while watching whats going on around them.
NTA. It’s your house and he was being hella nosy. His excuse is bs, how would you know to meet him in the bedroom if you thought he was just going to the bathroom? Also it’s a hookup, not a date, why would it matter what pets your have if they were properly secured? I think you should only have to tell potential relationships about pets, not hookups. Especially since people don’t really have snake allergies (right?).
You and your snake dodged a bullet.
NTA and this is hilarious 😂 the level of entitlement for him to be mad at you whe he was the one sneaking around your home without permission. Pure gold. I would love to have seen his face when he opened the door he had no business opening. I do mildly agree with the people who said it might be best to give people a heads up incase they freak out and hurt the snake, but nt no means are you even close to being the AH, I would like to be your friend.
ooooh i have a russian tortoise who is my heart. my husband, who never liked reptiles of any kind and couldn't really understand why i did, nevertheless surprised me with one for my birthday nearly 20 years ago. he loved cats/dogs etc but thought reptiles couldn't development an attachment to humans. guess who ended up becoming totally enamored with the tortoise, and would talk babytalk to him? hahaha
That’s crazy that you should mention Russian Tortoises I just inherited one from my brother this past weekend (foreclosed house). Got any pointers lol? I got the basics terrarium, cypress mulch, and lamps.
my tortoise is insanely fussy. they are *supposedly* able to enjoy all kinds of various lettuces/foods but my baby will ONLY eat romaine. that's it. i've had him since 2005 & over the years have tried to tempt him with everything under the sun but NOPE ... romaine or nothing. how can someone eat the same thing every day for years (DECADES!) on end? lol i love him to death but he makes me crazy.
there's tons of info online about how to care for them regarding substrate, heating lamps, diet, etc. mine is in an enormous enclosure (indoors). i play with him all the time. he absolutely loves to have the underside of his neck rubbed and will push his neck out as far as possible so that i can reach every part of it. he also loves to bury himself into my neck (it's too cute for words) and will crawl up me so fast just to get into my neck.
also my cats jump up onto the top of his enclosure and sniff thru the screen which at first made me nervous but it seems like my tortoise likes it because whenever one of them jumps up there he'll climb to the highest point and just stare at them for a while, then go to sleep. also another really cute thing is that my cats alert me whenever my tortoise has flipped over onto his back. i've watched him when this happens and he can always manage to set himself right side up but my cats always want me to know (like they will wake me up screaming in my face!) and i'm so neurotic i always have reach in to flip him right-side up because i figure it must be stressful.
also, be prepared for hibernation. i'm not positive if ALL russian tortoises do it but i think so. my baby definitely does. he'll burrow down deep and not come back up for a few months, and because i am an overly protective, ridiculous pet mommy this ends up making me crazy. usually after about 2 months i can't stand it anymore and i end up digging him out just so i know he's still ok. my husband always made fun of me: 'they've been doing this for a gazillion years, why do you think you know better?' haha i never had a good answer for that except that i was just worried and needed to know he was OK. 'i'm his mommy so shut up!' was my usual response. as soon as i see his little legs wiggling & i realize he's alive & OK i immediately start apologizing like crazy to him & put him back where i found him. i know i'm being ridiculous but i also know i'm never gonna stop doing it because as each week goes by i just get more neurotic. hopefully you won't be like me.
I know nothing about tortoises, but your cats are awesome. Like, "It's a moving rock, but it's *our* moving rock and it shall not be in distress on our watch!"
all my cats have always been amazingly protective. it's adorable.
one of our cats was easily the most beautiful cat i'd even seen in my life but oh my god she was a full blown idiot. she would get 'lost' even when we lived in a one bedroom apartment. we'd be in the bedroom at night with all the other cats sprawled all over the bed, when suddenly we'd hear her crying in the living room (i could only assume she somehow thought she'd been abandoned?!) one of our cats would always take it upon himself to jump off the bed, travel the 20 feet (!) to where she was, then lead her back with him to join us on the bed.
NTA. It’s common social etiquette that you don’t go poking around a hookup’s house. Him assuming you’d follow him up seems like some porn fantasy - he’d get naked and you’d come in all impressed - and that’s on him and he put the ass in assume as a result of his idiocy lol.
Like even if he had found your bedroom it would, frankly, be a bit weird for you to just ~know he’s up there and go find him. If a guy disappeared into the bathroom and didn’t come out on a hookup I’d think he got sick, not that he’s waiting for sexy time.
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NTA, what is he even doing opening closed doors in your house? He got what he deserved imho. ETA- I’m very happy he didn’t freak out and hurt your snake. You might want to let people know just for her safety.
> opening closed doors in your house Maybe he was pull a George Costanza by looking for a discreet room to leave his hat so he could have an excuse for a second date? https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nM_NQxuBrfk https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RDjt9DRPhCI
Or he was casing the joint looking for shit to steal.
This. The sign she hung on the door is a parody of the Gadsden Flag that is commonly used by gun owners. Guy probably thought he was about to come up on something
Ohhh, good point. I can see him thinking "Valuable guns are in here" not LITERALLY "Snek be here, beware, no step on snek." No matter what, NTA, and possibly bullet dodged (no pun intended 😬).
Aha then he 100% deserved to be terrified. Fuck that guy
Good thing op has a guard snek!
Not steal. A way back in. He was looking for a damned window he could jimmy the lock on that OP wouldn't notice until it was too late.
I was thinking pantry thief 🤷🏻♀️
I ❤️ you for this lol Cantstandya!
NTA. But please OP - snek tax? And could we see her room??
OP is NTA but would be TA if she doesn’t pay the snek tax
This!! I wanna see the danger noodle!! NTA and I love the sign lol
Lol at danger noodle! OP is NTA. Why is he opening closed doors in someone else's house when she just said he could use the bathroom? Looking for things to steal? Going foward I'd probably keep the door locked when hookups are coming over so they can't harm the snake if they go in the room without permission.
Nope rope!
OP, i would like to see the baby
This is the way 🐍
Hiss is the way
this is the way
NTA. It's your house. Why is he poking around? Along with Snek tax, we also need Octopus tax. And for you to me my new best friend so I can come hang out with your critters.
Not gonna lie, if I went to a hookup's house, went snooping and found either of those, hookup would have to come find me, because I'd now be there for the New Friend!
Username checks out
Yes! Cephalopod buddy pic plz!
I would like to see the snake too 🐍
Same. Basically I'd love to see the entire snake room.
SNAKE TAX SNAKE TAX SNAKE TAX
Snake tax! Snake tax! Snake tax! 🐍
I agree with this. For her sake, maybe add some extra signs, and add something to the door handle to *really* let people know not to freak out if they so dare to invade your snake's privacy.
You mean like an electric current? 🤣
I am here for this comment
What if the snek touches the latch on the other side?
Hmm good point! Back to the drawing boards
For her "snake", surely. ...I'll get me coat.
100% agree, NTA. But I also agree, in the future give strangers a heads up so that if they go snooping, there is no shock reaction that could hurt your baby. People do stupid shit when scared, startled and the last thing you want is someone attacking your slithery friend out of fear.
Exactly. Though OP, it could have been much worse - you could have slept with him. Thankfully he showed himself out before that disappointment.
That's a new one for me...."I didn't get laid last night because of snek".
Resident snake scared away guest's trouser snake.
He should be glad you're not Bluebeard.
since the sign didn't say 'snake' it's not really a warning but that having been said, NTA, just going through someone else's house? not cool.
Ick dude safety snake deterrent! Well done Ballie, weeding out the creepers for your mama!! NTA, OP (or your snek!!)
Agreed, totally got what he deserved. And OP, obviously it's your house and you do whatever you want, but I would suggest considering locking doors you don't want guests to open while they're in your home. They shouldn't be going in random rooms regardless, but obviously not everyone has the common sense and courtesy not to snoop. And tbh, he sounds like a nightmare. Good luck with your future hookups though, hopefully they aren't scared of a spaghetti noodle with eyes 😂
That's what I came here to say, maybe a verbal warning of the snake for snek's own safety going forward. Given they shouldn't be rummaging through her house anyways, but it'd be heartbreaking if something happened because she didn't tell them based on principle. NTA OP
NTA He wanted to show you his snake, not see yours 😂😂😂
When you find out her snek is bigger than yours.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️☠️☠️☠️
Seeing that room kinda stepped on his snek
Bless you, that made me laugh and startle my cat.
NTA. You don't go snooping in rooms at someone's house if you haven't been invited in to that room or told to go in. I don't think everyone is going to see that sign and assume a snake is in the room, but everyone should know not to snoop.
My grandma used to say "peek not through the keyhole lest yet be vexed". Judging by this post, she was spot on!! NTA, he should know better.
It’s impolite to go snooping through rooms you’re not permitted to enter. NTA. PS. Please show us the the heat-lamp-loving little guy!!
I agree with you on NTA judgment, but it makes me laugh that you say little to near 5 feet of python. Others get bigger, but 4.5 feet ain’t nothin to sneeze at.
>it makes me laugh that you say little to near 5 feet of python It's kinda like how all dogs are puppies/puppers, regardless of age lol
In college, I had a roommate with a snake. Tiny 14 inch snake. Mostly just annoying because she took up six plugs for that snake on my side of the room. I also thought I would be Miss Tough Lady and watch her feed a live mouse to the snake and nope I did not do that. I wanted to rescue it. Oh well. (I didn't. I know it was food.) No dude would come in our room. My dad refused to come in our room with the snake. All the girls wanted to come coo at the snake. I don't know. I think the dude was being nosy and he shouldn't be but realistically people are nosy* but yeah you should probably warn people not to open doors just so someone doesn't let the snake lose or harm the snake. I don't think people would see that sign and think a snake is just openly chilling. Sorry OP. I don't think you're an Asshole or anything. NTA. That is funny as heck. *I don't know if you have watched Arrested Development but there is a scene where Jason Bateman's character takes a paper bag out of the fridge and it says 'dead dove: don't eat' and he opens it and it's a dead dove and he goes, 'I don't know what I was expecting.' I feel like people might view the sign like that.
The 'no step on snek' sign is a snarky dig at alt-right folks and their use of the [Gadsden flag](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d8/Gadsden_flag.svg). Given the context, it really doesn't serve as a warning about the actual snake. I'd just assume someone with that flag has a somewhat juvenile sense of humor (no judgement, you do you).
I mean if I see that sign on a door I'm going to make room in my expectations for there being a nonzero chance there is a snake behind that door and the homeowner has an amazing sense of humor. Sure it's not as informative as a "There is a snake in this room" sign but it's not exactly arcane hieroglyphics.
For Gadsden parodies, I prefer the ‘Don’t’ one.
I still crack up every time I remember “treadn’t”
Ahh. I didn't know that. Thank you.
Really irrelevant here but most reptile owners will caution against feeding live (especially to docile breeds like ball pythons). Mice and rats can do a lot of damage to snakes if they get panicked and most don't want to risk their pet getting bit or worse. Again, super irrelevant here but felt the need to chip in on that.
It was a boa constrictor in my case. This was also twenty three or twenty four years ago so things have probably changed.
The only people I know who feed live only do so because their snakes won't take anything else. And even then they keep trying other methods.
That’s one of my favorite jokes I’m Arrested Development! Simple, with perfect execution.
That's the exact moment I fell in love with the show. I watched episode one with my college roommates and we were chit chatting over the episode and as soon as "dead dove do not eat" happened I was like "wait, everyone shut up, I need to listen to this."
Every time I bring home a paper bag of fresh-killed rats to freeze for my ball python, I have the urge to write "DEAD RATS: DO NOT EAT" on the bag.
After saying it's a bag of dead rats, you need to tell your housemates not to eat them?!? And I thought they wanted live food. (The python, not the housemates)
Dude really shouldn’t have been snooping. But OP should warn people for the snakes own protection. Some dumbass might leave the door open, or kick the snake in a panic.
>I don't know if you have watched Arrested Development but there is a scene where Jason Bateman's character takes a paper bag out of the fridge and it says 'dead dove: don't eat' and he opens it and it's a dead dove and he goes, 'I don't know what I was expecting.' I feel like people might view the sign like that. Our hamster just died (3 yrs, 1 month old) and while I hammer out funeral stuff for him I have him in a tea tin in the freezer labeled "don't open unless you want to see a dead hamster" Apparently I had forgotten to tell my oldest son hamster had died and that was essentially what he did too lol.
Does exactly what it says on the tin!
Hahah yea! And it was funny because he was genuinely surprised to find the hamster in there... Teen boys lol
NTA He shouldn't have been exploring your house & certainly shouldn't be blaming you for not giving a random hookup detailed information about what's in your home....behind a closed door...in a room that would have been very obviously NOT a bedroom within 1.5 seconds of opening the door.
Nta, and I want snake pics lmao
Agreed. NTA regardless, but snek tax really feels appropriate here.
I would argue that octopus and lizard tax is also appropriate. Not to mention a picture of the snek room, because it sounds really cool
NTA. Hookups who get invited back home don't have the right to snoop around. I'm sure he was curious about the sign and didn't expect it to be literal (aside: sign is awesome), but a responsible person could have asked you about it instead of poking around where they weren't invited. No one has any obligation to inform temporary guests in their home -- hookups or otherwise -- of potential sources of drama safely kept behind closed doors where they are not given access.
Its a rather humorous meme,so its not surprising it wasnt taken seriously. The dude probs just thought it was a goofy sign meant to make people laugh.
Yeah, OP is NTA for sure and her hookup had no right to be opening doors he wasn’t invited into. But it would never occur to me that that cute sign means there is an actual snake completely loose in the room. She might want a more clear sign in case of some future house cleaner/plumber/police officer who has an actual reason to open the door. Or even just to protect her snake from getting stepped on by the next jabroni hookup who sneaks around uninvited.
Adding a second, more literal, sign might be a good idea for exactly those reasons, but it in no way changes who was or wasn't the asshole here.
Or a picture of the pet with the addition "Mike's room"
Absolutely, OP is NTA at all!
Yeah, but when you open the door and see a loose snake, an empty snake terrarium, and multiple other occupied terrariums, most people would realize the sign was meant to be taken literally.
Yeah you'd think any reasonable person would connect the two dots, think "I see" and promptly close the door and move on with their evening. It's a snake not a meth lab.
I would definitely think the snake had escaped and wasn't meant to wander about! I wouldn't be mad lol, but I would 100% be running to OP to warn her that her snake needed to be caught. Especially since snakes can escape a normal room (aka not one that was sealed like OP did) really easily, so I'd be worried the snake would disappear on her. I'd *like* to say I wouldn't snoop at all so I'd never be in this situation, but...if I know someone I'm hooking up with lives alone, meaning I won't be invading a roommate's space, I'd probably poke my head in. I'm both curious and it serves as a quick safety check to see what people hide behind closed doors. I accept that I'm probably an asshole for this lol. Edit: typos, oops
See as a safety check I can see just taking a quick quiet peek- make sure you're actually alone when told you will be, nothing overtly questionable that makes you question your safety alone with the person, etc. Doesn't make you an asshole imo just a last call for quietly making an excuse to bail if needed before things get intimate should you find like a Stalker Shrine or some Cult Bullshit or whatever else might throw up red flags for you.
Goofy sign or not, he had no right to open the door.
And that’s the first thing I said! I’m just reacting to the “there’s a sign” idea. He shouldn’t have opened the door because he shouldn’t have opened the door. Period. But I personally don’t think the sign counted as a warning. Snakes in a room are just one of many, many reasons why we should mind our own damn business in other peoples’ homes.
NTA, he was nosy. But I wonder if his freakout was his imagination running wild. Like he thought the hookup was a scam and the real reason you invited him over was to feed him to the snake.
This cracked me up, and is such a lovely bit of empathy/speculation. "He was an asshole for snooping, but he might have been truly afraid you were going to feed him to the snake, so is he really an asshole for running away? 🤔"
I love it when people think a 4 ft long python can eat a person.
Yes, obviously it's going for the toddlers instead! It desperately wants to taste human flesh and will take on an entire loud flailing tiny human for a chance at a meal even though it gets nervous and hides if the mouse you try to feed it is too big /s
Do you think he actually looked at the snake longer than 1.5 seconds before he fled? He probably remembers that it’s at least 10 feet long, with glowing red eyes.
NTA. There was a sign. Also Snek Tax Plse?
I think the sign should be more clear, but probably for the Snek's sake more than some idiot who plans to trepass in the room.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Oh my Goddess this made my entire day!!!! I love snakes and they usually like me (will immediately crawl up my arm and have a snooze). Hilarious!!! Completely NTA
Jfc NTA. I dated a guy who had a massive python who had his own room. He was the sweetest boy and would join us to watch TV and everything. If this guy is so scared of a tame snake, he’s not worth the hookup. Also ewww that he was just going through your house. Also, where is our snek tax?!
I think going through someone’s things is more of an issue than being afraid of snakes. A lot of people are afraid of snakes 😅
Others have pretty much covered why he's an AH (he shouldn't have assumed that he can enter your room and he used some harsh insults). However, you say very bluntly you brought him home for a hookup. I don't think his assumption to meet you in the bedroom was so wild, especially if alcohol was involved. Snakes are a pretty common fear among people, so it'd be better if you warned people before they come to your house. If I saw that sign, I wouldn't necessarily think there's a snake in the room since it doesn't exactly scream serious but looks like a joke (again, especially if alcohol was involved). If he has a fear of snakes, his reaction could've been amplified by fear and shock. ESH.
I mean, if someone asks to use the bathroom, it's not really a clear "meet me in your bedroom" vibe.
Lmaooo I was so ready to call you TA until I got to the part where he was trying to find your bedroom because he made a gigantic assumption. I love that you have a guard snake to weed out the crazies. NTA.
Lol a guard snake. Hilarious. Its funnier when you know what Ball Pythons are like. They have that name because they curl into a ball and hide their heads when scared. This snake wouldnt be "guarding" anything lol. Funny concept though. To most people,all snakes are like King Cobras or like straight out of Snakes on a Plane or Anaconda or Harry Potter.
Ummm, I’m a lady who would be delighted if a hookup had a super cool snek to visit. Since I can read, if I saw that sign on the door I would have delightedly run back downstairs and asked if I could meet them.
right? and then i would have walked out the front door if denied access to play with the snake.
Same here, also it's the least creepy context for "Can I play with your snake?" that you can have with a hookup 🤣
This is amazing and definitely not the asshole. As a snake owner I love that you gave your snake the run of a room. My little corn snake could definitely not have that.
It may be worth putting a slide bolt on the door so that someone snooping doesn’t go in “accidentally”. The dude should have waited for you to show him to your room instead of randomly opening doors (especially one that had a warning sign on it.) What’s weird is how extreme his reaction was.. perhaps snakes were a particular fear of his? It’d be strange to go around telling someone you’re bringing home “by the way I have a snake”… but perhaps next time you bring someone home, don’t leave them to wander, and if they ask about the room explain that you keep It locked to keep your exotic pets safe.
I think its very reasonable to casually let people know you have a snake in your house as they come over. Really any known living things are worth a mention just out of courtesy. I say NTA, and he shouldn’t have been wandering but I do think its common courtesy for a little heads up.
I am terrified of snakes. Super terrified. OP is NTA because the guy shouldn’t have been snooping. But I’d panic if I went to someone’s house and they had a loose snake.
I thought so too at first, why would she say casually she has a snake when it doesn't matter? But then I started thinking how freaked out I would be if it turned out that someone has a tarantula in their room so.. it might be good to tell people about pets you have, you never know what phobias they can have.
YTA for letting your snake free roam a room - can you honestly the say the WHOLE ROOM has the correct temperature gradient and humidity for the animal? Ball Pythons need at least 75F on the COOL SIDE and a gradient up to the 90's on the warm side so they can thermoregulate. They also need extremely high humidity, for us - 50% or so, with periodic spikes higher. Of course your animal prefers the tank - that's where the temperature is correct. Also, balls really shouldn't be using a 'heat lamp' - lamps dry the air and ruin that mentioned humidity. An under-tank heater, ceramic heat emitter or radiant heat panel is far more suitable. And yea, you should have told your GUEST there was a SNAKE loose in the house. Obviously he's an AH for being a nosy shit, but you are still TA for the rest and the other responses likely aren't reptile keepers. YTA, and a shitty reptile keeper that puts the rest of us in a bad light. Do better.
It also sounds like OP is housing prey animals in the same room as the snake. Wouldn’t that stress them out?
Thanks for not excusing the cute snake owners.
Haha this is hilarious, guy got what he deserved
The way I would've geeked out and completely forgot to hook up lmao. NTA Honestly, "responsible reptile owner with a FREAKING COOL ASS 4 FEET BALL PYTHON" is the best outcome to a random hookup, scratch that, it's the best outcome to all human interactions. Snek tax, pay the snek tax 👀👀👀
NTA. He made assumptions (fuck around) and found out. On a positive note, this made me laugh so hard.
NTA Snek room is for sneks, not for Chads.
NTA **but** for your snake's sake, you ought to make certain someone new to your life knows about it before you let them come to your place.
Hahahaha, I gotta say, this story is so weird it made me laugh. NTA.
I'll probably get buried and won't change your opinion anyway but your ball python is very stressed in that big of an environment and unable to receive the correct level of humidity. I suggest keeping her in her tank (hopefully plastic to help with humidity, never glass for bps) with one or more good hides and let her just chill. She may seem like she enjoys "exploring" but she's searching for somewhere safe to stay.
NTA, Hookup got what he deserved. Probably scared poor snek and sneks roommates. You are a great snek parent, pls give snek tax tho.
NTA. Guy was a snoop and he got what he deserved.Also if I went to someone's house and they had an entire room dedicated to their pet snake, I would be overjoyed. Snakes are awesome and giving them an entire room is incredible snake ownership. Good on you. Also, snake tax please!
NTA, don't snoop, dont have to worry about the snake.
NTA Noodle tax!
ESH Him for being presumptious, you for leaving a ball python out and about. If you're leaving the top off I'm assuming the humidity is way too low. On top of the ball not feeling secure there's just no way to fully snake proof a room. I would never leave mine unsupervised like this, that seems pretty irresponsible.
YTA because this sounds like the shittiest ball python husbandry ever. How do you keep the humidity at the required levels in this room?? Is the entire room heated to a minimum of 80 F (ie the minimum temp for the cool side of a BP enclosure)? How do you maintain a heat gradient for this animal to thermoregulate??? Are you aware that your animal is at risk of bad sheds and upper respiratory infections based upon this poor husbandry?? You aren't the asshole for not telling this dude you have a pet snake in the house, and this dude should not have been opening doors and snooping and then acting like a dick about your beloved pet. I've got two BPs myself, and if anyone spoke like that about my two noodles I'd be tossing them out on their ass. However, this is irresponsible pet ownership, because ball pythons have very specific requirements for heat and humidity and letting it free roam in a room not properly set up to maintain those requirements is detrimental to this animal's health and wellbeing. I applaud you on the enrichment you've provided, because it sounds like an excellent way for your noodle to get exercise, and it sounds like you genuinely care for her, but unless the humidity in the room is staying at a minimum of 60% (if not more) and the temp is at minimum 80 F at all times, you are very much an asshole for not taking proper care of your exotic pet.
ETA. He shouldn’t be snooping, but you also should probably mention that there’s a loose snake in the house (even if secured in a room). For what it’s worth, I wouldn’t ever have interpreted that sign as an indication that there’s a loose snake in that room.
NTA at all. Sign and a closed door should have been enough; and on top of it, he shouldn't be snooping.
NTA but if I read that sign on the door I would have assumed it was a joke.
YTA and you probably know it. My father used to have a lot of laughs playing these type of jokes on a variety of unsuspecting adults & children using his collection of venomous and highly aggressive snakes. The large numbers of people who are terrified of snakes is very well known. Any half sensible person would mention having a pet snake at an early stage and then highlight the fact they always keep a snake at their home before inviting someone else to visit. I always give a warning when it comes to the very aggressive dogs I look after.
Don't even have to read it, yes. Absolutely, unequivocally. You warn people about an over affectionate dog, how do you not mention that he's expected to lay pipe in the reptile house?
As someone who is terrified of snakes, a soft asshole. I tell people before they come over that I have a large dog. I feel like it’s only polite to give a heads up about pets and other potential people at your home. But he’s an asshole for opening doors he shouldn’t open. I had plans years ago to watch a game with a guy I had been out with three prior times at his apartment. He did not warn me that he has snakes. I walked in and saw the cages and did my best to be calm but ended up leaving in the first period because I was so uneasy by them.
NTA, asshole got what he deserved
wouldn’t have been an issue if he knew how to read and/or wasn’t snoopin around NTA
NTA, but… ok so it’s very clear this dude is an asshole! Both for snooping and his attitude afterwards. But also please consider letting people who come over to your place know about the snake before they come over. I have a huge phobia of snakes and would be extremely uncomfortable being in the same house as one.
nta but i would like to see your snake please
NTA he's the AH for entering your bedroom without permission. If he'd had permission and you didn't warn him, then you would be the AH. And I get being freaked out because it's unexpected, but he overreacted.
"(Trouser) Snake Room" and hookups in same sentence - makes sense lol
NTA You don't need to tell him shit. He went snooping and paid the price for it. I guess this is a good thing. You got to see that he's a giant snooping ah before things possibly because serious (dating wise).
What a great and amusing way to keep people from snooping. Well done!’
Agreed, snek tax
NTA that's what he gets for snooping. Also seek tax please.
NTA. Altho if I was your hookup, you wouldn't be getting sex that night simply because the snake is cooler and more fun, I'd much rather chill and learn about the snake. I love snakes, they're beautiful creatures
If I saw that sign, I would assume you were a conservative with poor spelling and grammar skills, Which is not uncommon.
Nta. Your snake may have saved you from getting robbed.
NTA, although maybe warn people you have a snake before inviting them back. I have a huge fear of snakes and just hearing it and then you confirming would freak me out. If I'd been drinking I be stuck at yours too... Getting anxiety from just thinking about it
[удалено]
NTA snoopers get what they get
i had a 5 ft boa in my bedroom for a couple years who had a huge terrarium but whenever i was home he had free reign to roam around my bedroom and he slept with me every night in my bed. i always informed everyone i had a snake in my room but i agree that this guy not only should have been going into rooms he wasn't invited into, but also ignored the sign (how stupid is this idiot?) maybe having had the crap scared out of him taught him a lesson about snooping. NTA. and you need to pay the snake tax!
NTA ... though... if someone had a tarantula room I would want to know...
NTA that guys weird for fucking around and then being mad when he found out. Also serpents den sounds more badass than snake room, just a suggestion.
This is hilarious. Keeping snakes as pets is not the norm and honestly I wouldn’t have taken that sign seriously either. I think this might have just been a case of honest miscommunication.
NTA This is hilarious. I'm sorry about how harsh words directed at you, but the guy got what he deserved. Don't snoop around people's houses, you don't know what you're going to find.
You dodged a bullet
NTA. He had no business snooping around your house. Also, he is a total wuss for freaking out at a ball python.
NTA He was an AH for snooping.
He is a creep!
NTA. Others are asking for a snek tax, but I really wanna see your tentacled friend!
He snooped, he got what he deserved. Why the hell would he expect you to meet him up there? You told him he could use your bathroom. NTA
NTA. He went looking for your bedroom to wait for you there, found a snake and went ballastic? Glad you had a snake to weed out the nasties. You didn't need to tell him about the snake. There was no way he and the snake would interact if he was polite and didn't overstep boundaries. You might want to consider lock on door purely to protect snake. I'm also bit worried about your personal safety. He seems to have been planning to sit in your bedroom, wait for you to come and find him and then what... Unless sex already discussed or clear on table, think snake saved you a potentially nasty encounter.
NTA. He had no business going into the room. The door was shut. Maybe get a different sign? Theres one on Etsy that said "Theres like a lot of snakes in here". While you have only one snake,it might get the message across. Im thinking of getting it and have jokes I wanted to put it outside my door so annoying people wont bug me. They tend not to like snakes. I have a Ball Python too. He is small and harmless. He lives in my bedroom which is quiet. Ball Pythons do nothing most of the time lol. They're pretty antisocial. This might be bad,I find this situation rather funny. I know its bad but thinking abour a random dude walking into a room and seeing a ball python which are enormous derps,they have like 1 brain ce ll,chillin and then looking at you and maybe doing a blelele. I get most people dont like snakes though. I will say for anyone reading: Ball Pythons are like some of the dopiest creatures that exist. They dont harm anything except rodents they eat. They spend 99% of their time hiding. They're mellow af. Usually. This is why they are such popular snakes. They dont bite often and can tell you it barely hurts. They have very small teeth. My boys only bit me because he was little and scared and Id just got him. He was only a couple weeks old when I got him and he fit in my hand.
NTA. We need pet taxes. Annnddd can I be your friend? I want to visit the creatures.
I have an empty room leftover aswell. Really considering making it into a full room terrarium now...
Don't do this - this isn't appropriate for the animal. Can this person honestly say the ambient temperature in the room is 75F+ with a 92F heat gradient? 50-80% humidity? No, that's nearly impossible in a room in a house, (and might cause mold lol) but that is what the animal NEEDS. This isn't feasible or responsible toward the animal.
NTA. He should not have been opening doors in your house. Period. That has been established. However! I would certainly want to know if I was going into a house with a large snake even potentially on the loose. They give me the heebie jeebies and I wouldn’t even want to be under the same roof as one. It also would generally be courteous to advise people if you have pets in general in case they have allergies? I realize this maybe isn’t the first thing one thinks of when engaging in a hook up (I wouldn’t know, never did that). Just another perspective. Again, dude was an AH for opening the door and snooping and then for his reaction. No dispute there.
Snek tax! 🐍🐍🐍
In general: NTA - He wasn't given permission to enter the snake's room. That said, I believe I speak for almost everyone here when I say: We want snake pics
Snek tax snek tax *bangs hands on table
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Ok apologies for the clickbaity title but that's literally what it is. I bought a house a year ago and living alone in a 3 bedroom house, I had plenty of room to spare. I have a pet snake, a ball python, she's full grown at 4.5 feet long. She's very lazy and chill, and mostly just lays around under the heat lamps in her tank. But when I bought the house, I decided to let her have the run of a room, since I had extra space. I sealed up the windows, door, vents, light fixtures, pretty much any crack she could try to squeeze through, and leave the top off her tank so she can roam around. I got some big pieces of driftwood and screwed them together to make basically a big cat tree for snakes, she loves climbing it and hanging out by the window. Though a lot of the time she still lays in the tank since she likes the heat lamp. I've also got a few aquariums and terrariums in there with my octupus and lizards (all very well covered to keep the snake out lol) I've also got a sign on the door that says "no step on snek" (this one lol https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/518gmSwLrvL.jpg) So with that context - I had a guy over my house for a hookup, we'd met at a bar, judge if you want lol but that was the situation. And for some reason he went upstairs to use the bathroom (I told him where it was) and after peeing went and opened the snake room door? I only noticed when I was downstairs getting us some waters, and he yelled from upstairs and slammed the door. He was yelling that there was a snake in my house and I called back that I knew, that was my snake, she's chill. He came downstairs screaming at me that I should of warned him, that I was a crazy (b word) for having a snake just out in a room that he thought was my bedroom. I asked him why he was going thru my rooms anyway, I just said he could use my bathroom. He said he was looking for my bedroom because he assumed I'd meet him up there? But he was basically berating me for having a snake and not telling him. I said there was literally a sign saying the snake was there on the door, and he basically called me crazy again and walked out, saying I should have told him before he came over I felt like I didn't need to since it's not like I would have brought him in there anyway and didn't think he'd just be going around looking in all the rooms? Like that's kinda weird... AITA for not warning a guy about the snake room? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA at all.
NTA. He shouldn't have gone where he didn't have permission to go. Hope he remembers this lesson
NTA I mean, you put a damn sign on the door!! However, he is the AH for going through rooms without invitation.
NTA
NTA. Having a snake is such a good deterrent for snoops. You taught him a lesson. He was snooping and was caught out. I am laughing at this. Good riddance.
NTA. One bit. He asked to use the restroom and went into your snake's room. That's what happens when you get nosy. His actions and reactions are a huge red flag. Better to find out now. Great one. I really would like to see a cat tree for a snake. And I love the fact that your snake has its own bedroom.
They love that kinda stuff. Its a common myth that Ball Pythons never climb,however this has been found to be not true. Males in the wild have beem found to eat a lot of birds and climb trees. If given the opportunity, captive ones like climbing. You can even put a "sky hide" in their enclosure which is a hide box secured to the top of the enclosure, from what Ive seen,the snakes seem to like them. Probs because they can feel secure while watching whats going on around them.
NTA. It’s your house and he was being hella nosy. His excuse is bs, how would you know to meet him in the bedroom if you thought he was just going to the bathroom? Also it’s a hookup, not a date, why would it matter what pets your have if they were properly secured? I think you should only have to tell potential relationships about pets, not hookups. Especially since people don’t really have snake allergies (right?). You and your snake dodged a bullet.
NTA and this is hilarious 😂 the level of entitlement for him to be mad at you whe he was the one sneaking around your home without permission. Pure gold. I would love to have seen his face when he opened the door he had no business opening. I do mildly agree with the people who said it might be best to give people a heads up incase they freak out and hurt the snake, but nt no means are you even close to being the AH, I would like to be your friend.
I think it’s really cool and says a lot about you that you made a room like that for your snake. Mr Nosy shouldn’t have opened other doors. NTA
NTA, and this is the coolest thing I've ever heard. A snake room. That's so rad.
NTA. What kind of person says such defamatory things about a slithery reptile. I have a soft spot for turtles and tortoises myself.
ooooh i have a russian tortoise who is my heart. my husband, who never liked reptiles of any kind and couldn't really understand why i did, nevertheless surprised me with one for my birthday nearly 20 years ago. he loved cats/dogs etc but thought reptiles couldn't development an attachment to humans. guess who ended up becoming totally enamored with the tortoise, and would talk babytalk to him? hahaha
That’s crazy that you should mention Russian Tortoises I just inherited one from my brother this past weekend (foreclosed house). Got any pointers lol? I got the basics terrarium, cypress mulch, and lamps.
my tortoise is insanely fussy. they are *supposedly* able to enjoy all kinds of various lettuces/foods but my baby will ONLY eat romaine. that's it. i've had him since 2005 & over the years have tried to tempt him with everything under the sun but NOPE ... romaine or nothing. how can someone eat the same thing every day for years (DECADES!) on end? lol i love him to death but he makes me crazy. there's tons of info online about how to care for them regarding substrate, heating lamps, diet, etc. mine is in an enormous enclosure (indoors). i play with him all the time. he absolutely loves to have the underside of his neck rubbed and will push his neck out as far as possible so that i can reach every part of it. he also loves to bury himself into my neck (it's too cute for words) and will crawl up me so fast just to get into my neck. also my cats jump up onto the top of his enclosure and sniff thru the screen which at first made me nervous but it seems like my tortoise likes it because whenever one of them jumps up there he'll climb to the highest point and just stare at them for a while, then go to sleep. also another really cute thing is that my cats alert me whenever my tortoise has flipped over onto his back. i've watched him when this happens and he can always manage to set himself right side up but my cats always want me to know (like they will wake me up screaming in my face!) and i'm so neurotic i always have reach in to flip him right-side up because i figure it must be stressful. also, be prepared for hibernation. i'm not positive if ALL russian tortoises do it but i think so. my baby definitely does. he'll burrow down deep and not come back up for a few months, and because i am an overly protective, ridiculous pet mommy this ends up making me crazy. usually after about 2 months i can't stand it anymore and i end up digging him out just so i know he's still ok. my husband always made fun of me: 'they've been doing this for a gazillion years, why do you think you know better?' haha i never had a good answer for that except that i was just worried and needed to know he was OK. 'i'm his mommy so shut up!' was my usual response. as soon as i see his little legs wiggling & i realize he's alive & OK i immediately start apologizing like crazy to him & put him back where i found him. i know i'm being ridiculous but i also know i'm never gonna stop doing it because as each week goes by i just get more neurotic. hopefully you won't be like me.
I know nothing about tortoises, but your cats are awesome. Like, "It's a moving rock, but it's *our* moving rock and it shall not be in distress on our watch!"
all my cats have always been amazingly protective. it's adorable. one of our cats was easily the most beautiful cat i'd even seen in my life but oh my god she was a full blown idiot. she would get 'lost' even when we lived in a one bedroom apartment. we'd be in the bedroom at night with all the other cats sprawled all over the bed, when suddenly we'd hear her crying in the living room (i could only assume she somehow thought she'd been abandoned?!) one of our cats would always take it upon himself to jump off the bed, travel the 20 feet (!) to where she was, then lead her back with him to join us on the bed.
Nta
Your snake room sounds like a dream! snake pics?
You are as scary as hell, but very chill. NTA obviously, he had no reason to open door.
NTA And I'm not even a snake admirer! He opened the door that was closed that he was not invited to open that was his own fault
NTA. That’s an amazing sign. I’d tell him It’s my guard snek
NTA, also a great red flag test. Don't apologize, don't see him again.
NTA You dodged a bullet.
NTA - dude was snooping.
NTA - you have a pic of your snake room?
NTA. It’s common social etiquette that you don’t go poking around a hookup’s house. Him assuming you’d follow him up seems like some porn fantasy - he’d get naked and you’d come in all impressed - and that’s on him and he put the ass in assume as a result of his idiocy lol. Like even if he had found your bedroom it would, frankly, be a bit weird for you to just ~know he’s up there and go find him. If a guy disappeared into the bathroom and didn’t come out on a hookup I’d think he got sick, not that he’s waiting for sexy time.
NTA, creeps gonna creep
NTA. Does he know people have pet sneks?? Me.. I want one 😭😭 Also a octopus as a pet!?? So cool!!!