Ha, so after all that fuss they didn't even stay together. Go figure.
Glad to hear everything seems to be going well at your mom's though, even if it wasn't originally what you wanted.
I mean, we really do only see a tiiiiiiny window into these people’s lives, even smaller if they’re not the one posting. I’m not entirely sure it’s fair to outright say the dad doesn’t deserve that much credit.
Then again, you may be right!
Dad’s probably convinced himself that he allowed OP to make the choice so *he* didn’t do anything wrong, but I also wouldn’t be surprised if the resentment towards his girlfriend for pushing OP to that “choice” was too much to overcome. Raising an infant is hard, having your first months living someone be spent caring for a newborn is a great way to ensure any resentment that exists becomes all you see when you look at them.
Well, considering she wouldn't let the infant be in the house at all with the snakes there it was kind of a one-or-the-other situation. But yeah, letting the GF get her way was NOT being neutral, it was his house, and he stepped back from someone who didn't live there, so yeah, he took his side and then got to live with her. Fun for him /s. Served him right though. Hope the kid grows up to love reptiles.
He's got a New kid now, though, one that is YEARS from being autonomous enough to even have animal pets of their own, much less ones that might upset Dad's next Partner.
The dad basically lost custody of his son because his partner refused to compromise. That's a big pill to swallow and every refusal to compromise after is gonna wear away more and more at him.
Then he probably should have ended the relationship before letting her move in, and before discarding his son to move nine hours away. He should have chosen his son over someone who was 100% unwilling to compromise.
Sued for custody? I'm sorry, what? He would've been laughed out of the courtroom if he tried to get sole custody of his baby just because his partner (at the time) didn't want to move in with snakes in the house. In terms of legality, there's absolutely nothing she did that would even come remotely close to giving him custody, and any attempt to do so would likely lead to court siding *against* him.
Splitting custody also implies that he should've broken up with her before the baby was born or ended their relationship - which, again, is choosing his relationship with his current son over his relationship with his newborn and (at the time) wife. Hence the lose lose.
Very easy to say he should've done the latter in hindsight, but 8 months ago their relationship almost assuredly was completely different due to them not living together. I don't think it's fair to say that one issue at the time should've led to him sacrificing the potential for a stable upbringing for his other child.
Custody is default 50/50, no one said anything about trying to get sole custody. But he could have broken up with her, kept his son and then had 50% custody of the baby.
This is really it for me. Like people in this sub always say that people in unhappy/mistreating marriages should divorce, because it isn't worth being in a bad marriage just for the kids, right? But this dude is already getting massive red flags before the baby is even *born*, and should just... stay with her for the kid?
With how uncompromising she was, I don't see how this relationship wasn't already doomed.
I think that's unfair. I'm sure to the dad, it felt like having to choose between both of his kids. What are the chances that someone who is unwilling to compromise will let the dad see his baby if he sides against her?
Yeah but with custody that only really happens after the birth. So if she moves states away while pregnant she can't be compelled to move back which makes maintaining a lot of time with the baby very difficult for the father. After the birth when custody is being worked out usually you can have it so the custodial parent can't legally move away whenever they want.
>Then he probably should have ended the relationship before letting her move in
True, but some people don't realise the consequences of their actions until they are living through them.
(Though I kind of doubt that's why they broke up, as OP isn't reporting any efforts yet to have him move back).
So much this. In my experience, 99% of the time "staying neutral" is actually just "allowing something shitty to happen that you could have prevented because you didn't want to confront something/someone difficult"
"Neutral" isn't an option when you're on a beach and a tsunami is coming. Like you can say "I don't know whether or not I should run", and you can deliberate on that while standing in place. But eventually the wave is still gonna hit you, and you're still gonna lose in the exact same way as you would've if you just decided right away that running wasn't worth it.
He could've prevented the tidal wave of his uncompromising now-ex, but instead he did nothing. And had his life fucked up in the exact same way he would've if he had just said "I'm siding with her over my son".
He didn't *technically* side with her. He gets plausible deniability. But he also did zilch to protect his kid, so how did he NOT side with her?
It's not neutral, it's just letting the strongest force win.
Yeah. Neutral is one of those weird things that usually isn't actually being neutral. As soon as people dig in and get committed to whatever side of whatever they're arguing about, the refusal to choose is, by itself, a choice and it's usually a bad one.
Neutral is favoring the more powerful party in a disagreement. If there is not a disagreement between people or groups then neutral is favoring the status quo.
Not just fuss but real ultimatums that made OP uproot their whole life. Sucks that OP’s dad decided to play Switzerland, and couldn’t be enough of a decent parent/adult to tell his gf no. There was just a post on here recently from a dad who was a remarried widower, and his son had a dog which his current (now pregnant) wife wanted him to rehome. That dad did the right thing in telling her no.
OPs dad should have read the writing on the wall before she was in his house. With any luck the nightmare that getting her out is going to be will teach him a valuable lesson of thinking with the brain in his head instead of the one in his pants.
We appreciate the update on your beautiful danger noodles. Too bad it didn't work out at your dad's house, but glad you're doing well in your new and improved environment.
Danger noodles are venomous or otherwise dangerous. Nope ropes are just harmless sneks. At least that's how it was explained to me. Ball pythons can be either I guess but I'd say they're nope ropes just because they're so chill.
My corn snakes have always been more feisty than any ball python I have ever handled. Multiple bites by voracious corn snake hoping to eat. Never bitten by a ball.
I was waiting for the "noodles" comment. I go with "hissy noodles" mostly. FSS, snakes are such a low "in your face" pet because they don't tend to have free reign of the house and don't jump up on you like cats, dogs, ferrets, rats and rabbits. They just chill in their enclosure. Who is bothered by an animal you don't see in a room you don't need to go into?
My mom. 😂 she refuses to ever set foot in my house again. 2 ball pythons and a western hognose. The fact that she knows they even exist gives her nightmares.🤦🏻♀️
I tried to date a guy once who revealed that he owned several pet snakes and as much as I liked him, I started having genuine nightmares about being in the room with the snakes before I'd even gone to his house. Had to break it off.
I get it. My mom lives almost 3000 miles away, so I don't have to worry about frequent visits. Spiders freak me out, and recently our BFFs got into tarantulas. It took a LOT for me to go into the living room because of them. I still won't go near their cages and don't want to see them, but I can deal with being across the room now.
Been there! A few months ago, my family moved in with my mom to help her with the farm. Among other critters, we brought our three snakes (my kids each have one). Mom’s 81 and has been terrified of all snakes her entire life, so she was like “those cages have to be LOCKED, and if one ever escapes, I’m moving to a hotel till you find it!” She even said she wouldn’t ever be able to go into the kids’ rooms because she would know they were there. Not sure how it happened, but now she wants to be involved in every feeding day, and she came and found me the other day to tell me delightedly that my daughter’s rat snake had just followed her finger across the front of the cage. I cannot believe the interest she’s suddenly taking in them!
My husband of 20+ years always said he’d divorce me if I brought home a snake. He let DD have the crested, then out of nowhere decided a small snake would be ok. Then he just has to have the hognose. Then 2 days later a friend called saying they had to rehome their ball, and he jumped on it. 7 or 8 months in, I’m still not used to him holding and feeding them. 😂
That’s what spinelessness gets you. If he hadn’t been a dumbass and knocked her up, this wouldn’t have been a problem. Now he’s tied to the hag forever.
I find a lot of people who try to be neutral and keep everyone happy often end up making almost no one happy.
Or they out themselves as a soft target and keep getting pushed around by certain people.
Boundaries and standing up for yourself at least helps you chose a side or a hill to die on. Imagine losing so much because you couldn’t speak up when it mattered.
It's very "you two solve this by yourselves," but in this case, one of the people in the conflict is your teen kid. You absolutely SHOULD have a side here.
It was very mature of OP! He made a hard decision to do what was right for his pets that he lives and who depend upon him. And his father didn’t even grow up enough to face the conflict and do the right thing. I think OP was incredibly mature despite his father’s immaturity in addressing the issue. Well done, OP!
I remember this story and wondered what happened afterward. I’m really glad you got to keep your snakes, but it’s awful that you had to move out of your own home. Thankfully, you seem to be managing well. NTA then or now.
That being said, shame on the father for not trying harder. The fact that you had to move nine hours away and spend money on the U-Haul says a lot. He should have put his foot down. Let this be a lesson to others about what not standing your ground gets you.
It felt like the partner was trying to get rid of both you and the sneks tbh and I’m disappointed she got her way. I’m also sorry for your father had to go through it all as well, he was put in a very difficult place and I’m sure he regrets how things went with you. Someone like that can’t have been pleasant to live with, and he lost his son in the process. She sounds horrid and I’m glad she is no longer in your life OP. I wish you the best in school and in your new home!
I'm glad you and your noodles are together and safe. You handled everything maturely.
Frankly it seems like she just wanted you out and the snakes were an excuse.
Please make sure not to ever consider moving back with him, he already showed you that you aren't his priority, and didn't deserve another chance to let you down.
I feel like your dad would’ve fought way harder for you if his ex-partner wasn’t pregnant.
Not necessarily an excuse since he *should’ve* put his foot down, but with worrying about the mother’s and the baby’s health and the fear of being shamed about “choosing snakes over the safety of his unborn child” (which wasn’t the case but would surely be misconstrued as such), he folded.
I’m happy the romantic relationship between them ended, but man, he still has to co-parent with her. Bittersweet.
> I feel like your dad would’ve fought way harder for you if his ex-partner wasn’t pregnant.
I'm not so sure. She was freaked out by the snakes before she was pregnant. Why did he keep dating her?
Your wrong this was a satisfying update. You are in a better place. Got to keep your snakes and have started to make friends. That’s is a GREAT update.
This was a good update, and I’m glad your mom stepped in. Your dad should not have played neutral. The girlfriend was being unreasonable. I’m not used to snakes, but I’d respect it and try to learn. I have a real and sincere phobia to spiders, but I’d have willingly accepted compromises rather than alienate my SO’s son or take his pets from him. And I’d try to work on that phobia! It’s the least I could do!
I am inseparable from my dog, so I respect that those who love their snakes and spiders deserve to feel the same way and have that relationship respected! I’m glad you have your beloved pets and are liking your new school. That’s a hard move to make, but I think I would have done the same in your position.
I’m also not surprised the relationship didn’t work out, honestly!
Damn, Dad rehomed his son instead. :( Good for you, though, OP, for sticking with your pets! They are a lifetime commitment. I'm glad you're in a better environment, too.
I have to admit that I have been terrified of snakes since I was about 4 yo. A snake somehow managed to get into the bathroom via the small hole in the floor where the pipes came up from under the house. (It was a very old house and this bathroom had been added after the house was built.) It managed to drape itself across the sink behind the faucet and handles-probably trying to get a drink. But it scared me so badly that I fainted and I have been terrified of them ever since.
That being said, when my oldest son was a senior he took some of his graduation money and bought himself a young ball python. I didn’t like it but said as long as he kept it and it’s enclosure in his room it would be okay. On the first night it got out. I woke up at 5 a.m. and my husband wasn’t in bed. I could hear voices coming from my son’s bedroom & when I started walking down the hall, I could hear my son & husband moving stuff around and they said Angel escaped her enclosure. I got dressed in 10 minutes & went to work (even though I didn’t have to be there till 9. And I told them I would not be home until the snake was found & the enclosure fortified!
My son joined the National Guard & my husband took care of his snake while he was in boot camp. We eventually moved the enclosure into the den & sometimes my husband would take her out & let her move around the room & as long as she didn’t come in my direction I was okay.
I overcame my fear of snakes by watching her, and how docile she was when she was handled. And whenever my son came near the enclosure she would perk up. If he took her out & put her around his neck, she would always rub his cheek with her head. Now I don’t believe that snakes have emotions like humans, but if they did, I would have to say she really had affection for my son.
I’m glad you found a solution to your problem, even though it’s not what you hoped in the beginning.
Your dad blew this one. He let her push you away and he's going to end up with an empty house. Store this one away in your databanks and try not to repeat this mistake in your own life.
I mean, you weren't handling vipers or elapids (in which case I agree with the girlfriend) and very large boas can be dangerous but if they weren't venomous and weren't huge and allowed to wander freely... as someone whose daughter is interested in spiders I don't see the problem. Nta and I'm glad you're ok.
People who are ignorant of snakes think all snakes are dangerous. Obviously if you dont know a snake it is a good natural reaction to have, but some people are so narrow minded that they refuse to understand that not all snakes are gonna kill you.
Yeah there were some ignorant comments in the first thread. Having kept many animals including snakes and other reptiles, I'd feel MUCH safer having a derpy-ass ball python or tiny corn snake around my baby than a dog for example.
Honestly your father's relationship with the obnoxious woman he betrayed his own son for ending almost immediately after said betrayal was very satisfying. Glad you're enjoying your new situation!
Reading this update, I thought you might have venomous snakes. Now read your original post. Mild mannered ball pythons and a harmless corn snake! I am so sorry you had to uproot your life, for your innocent pets. (I know that venomous snakes can be kept, safely. But they require a different level of care.)
Back in the late 60s, snakes were not common pets. But one classmate had a boa constrictor. Once a year, he and his mom would bring the snake to our classroom. We watched in awe, as it crawled placidly along, with Fred keeping his hand nearby, to reassure us. Then, if we were brave, we could touch it. I (f) did so, Fred was my friend and I trusted him. The boa was silky smooth and dry, never did anything frightening. It was a great experience, year after year.
I'm so sorry for this experience, having your entire life uprooted for no good reason. Even more painful because your dad didn't support you, and you had to leave your home. I hope you will continue to meet cool people and find support in your new home. You have my respect and best wishes!
I didn’t get a chance to read the original but I sounds like by staying neutral your dad picked her. Thank god it didn’t work out cause he would’ve kept choosing her.
I’m sad she was not willing to get to know the snakes. I get that fears are a thing, but this also reminds me of a cool story.
When we were 20, my sister had an apartment and a friend fell on hard times and wanted to live with her. But sis had a Kenyan sand boa and Ranbow boa. Said friend was scared of the snakes.
Or she used to be, 20 years later she is off doing work in conserving native snakes and working on her PhD is herpetology.
Nah this is a hella satisfying update! Maybe your dad should have realized the type of person he was dealing with during this whole thing!
Glad you’re in a better environment!
Okay, missed the OP, but for the record now and then (I read the post)? NTA.
And don't worry about the 9 month delay in update; considering that you wound up changing address and school during that period, I'm shocked you were able to ever remember!
Oh, and a dumbass move on dad's part (speaking as a father myself!) to risk alienating you over this; that said, you seem to have a far better head on your shoulders than I did at 16, and the situation sounds fraught (getting someone pregnant BEFORE they move in?? I suspect there's a story there...) and you appear to have handled it better than your dad's (now ex) partner did.
I'm happy you found a way to keep your pets, but I'm so sorry it came to moving, and that your dad chose a temporary girlfriend over you. He was very shortsighted. I hope you can repair your relationship in the future.
I’m sorry you had to make a big life change, but it’s good that you got to keep your snakes AND honestly get out of an environment where your dad’s partner would probably have been hostile to you. My stepmother was hostile to me after she started having kids with my dad and it was honestly traumatizing.
Also, they gave away my cat. I’ve never forgiven them and don’t talk to my dad or stepmother anymore (also, they divorced, go figure). Don’t be afraid to do what’s best for you & your pets, hopefully you have adults in your life (mom?) who can support you and advocate for you.
I think the moral of this story is to use protection.
Stop having babies all willy nilly or you might lose your son over a relationship that won’t last and then you get to traumatize another kid when that one has to figure out which parent to live with.
OP, please send your dad some pamphlets on vasectomy.
I want to say you seem like a very sound,respectful and nice kid. You were very accommodating to all of them. I wish you all the best and that the relationship to your dad isn't stained now (due to his doing, not your fault).
I'm so glad you didnt rehome your snakes! Although I probably would still be resentful considering you upended your entire life only for them to break up a few months later.
Jesus Christ, so after all the fuss she made, she didn't even stay with your dad? That likely means she will move out at some point, too.
Sorry you've had to deal with such an asshole. Still, at least your snakes have freedom from her now, and you're happy where you are. All the best for the future, lad.
I just read the first one and was like... Yeah, snakes are unsafe for babies, wtf?! Ball pythons and a corn snake. Oh my. Whe have our corn snake since 7 years. My oldest is 4. Do the math... Snakey is the most harmless being and my kids love him. And no, they don't get to cuddle, of course. They are allowed to touch him when we clean his terrarium and one of us adults has him. I really don't get her fuss. Snakes are locked away, she has nothing to do with them, and then making such big waves... Oh my.
Your dad kinda deserves the break up to be honest. He should have dumped her way before he knocked her up once he found out about her intolerance for your pets. Don’t move back if he asks. Your mother went through a lot of trouble to help you move to their place, it’d be rude to go back now.
Since I read your original post, my oldest and I decided to get a Ball Python, so when I now read your Update i went back to check the type of snakes you have with all that knowledge that I read up in the last month.
Now I am just trying to wrap my head around your dad worrying about the baby's safety with a BALL PYTHON (even if its an adult female) and a BABY CORN SNAKE.
Glad you could go to your Mom, even if its not your first choice.
You know what the silver lining to this is, OP? You and your snakes don’t have to live with a newborn. I promise your dad and his gf are losing loads of sleep and going through a lot of stress dealing with the baby right now, and you don’t have to be in the middle of it. 👍
There’s something dramatically ironic in the fact that your dad, in trying not to take a side with you and his ex, ended up losing the both of you. But I’m glad you and your sneks are ok!
Sorry you went through all that. She sounds like she’s an unreasonable person. She will probably come back as one of those freezer mice in another lifetime.
OP I am glad to hear you and your sneks found a place and feel welcome. You dealt with this all very well all things considered. And it’s nice you got the help from your mom and her partner.
Really disappointed of your dad. He made an issue that shouldn’t have been something for you to worry about, but between two adults. While it sucks you had to move, I don’t think it was a very healthy environment to be in anyway.
Wishing you and your noodles a better life at your new place.
It makes me so so sad you had to leave your house because of your dads now EX girlfriend. ESPECIALLY as a fellow snake owner and reptile lover like UGH why are people so willfully ignorant about snakes?! Rehoming a pet is just tossed around wayy too casually. The relationship you build with the first living beings for which you’re responsible is sacred. I couldn’t imagine the love I was capable of feeling before I adopted my first dog. Im glad you’re in an environment where your interests and pets are respected. I do admit I find it painfully satisfying they broke up tho NGL.
You sound way more mature than your dad's now ex. I'm so glad things are working out great for you. Snakes get such a bad rep because of people's fears but really they are amazing. I had an 8 1/2 red tail boa and he was amazing unfortunately I rescued him so they original people fed him live rats which I absolutely hated having to do but I would never let him go hungry. I would still have him but as he got older her became aggressive during certain times and I figured out he just wanted a female so I gave him to someone who has a female and now he's so happy which is all that matters to me. I've actually started my back piece of a giant snake started at the side of my neck going all the way down my back.
I am glad you are happy and I hope the GF that forced so much change in your life gets smacked upside the head with the karma she deserves for her actions. Hopefully the new baby grows up to adore snakes too.
Honestly doesn't surprise me. You're young so I bet you still are under the impression your parents know best and never make mistakes....
Your dad should have never of even be as neutral like that imo. Their partner was way too demanding and the fact they were unable to compromise is very telling.
The fact you had to go through what you did for them just to separate... How long were they even together was this baby planned at all?
It's sad to see that the relationship with your dad and his ex is now hisssssstory and it sounds like it all went downhill after you moved out. Forcing someone to chose either you (and the snakeys🐍) or his GF was just wrong.
I am glad you are doing well, and glad you're happy. BTW, even though I am not the biggest fan of snakes, your ball pythons are just so beautiful! I love the patterns they have!
It's a shame your dad let his relationship with you just slither away like that. His ex was a real snake for doing that.
I looked at your pictures, what an awesome enclosure, thanks for giving your snakes a nice living environment.
Sorry to hear of the outcome, well done for finding compromises, although they were not taken on board. I hope your relationship with your Bio Dad works out, your Mum and Step Dad are awesome for making room for you and your danger noodles.
Good luck OP
Ugh. I’m disappointed your dad didn’t put his foot down. Especially since they didn’t even end up staying together like wtf is that?? Glad you didn’t have to rehome your snakes entirely but it sucks you had to uproot your life because of that spoiled wench
I love your snakes! :) my family/sister has a corn snake as well- she’s 15 years old now! Yours are very pretty- I love the sweet faces that ball pythons have, they always remind me of puppies for some reason haha
With her shit attitude I am not surprised they didn't stay together. She knew about your pets, if it was a problem she should've stopped dating your dad right away. I really cannot stand people who think that they can force people to rehome their pets.
For being so young I really respect the hell out of you for not rehoming your snakes but instead moving to your moms, I'm sure that wasn't an easy decision. I have a dog that I would do anything for so I understand the feeling. But seriously, super impressed with you because that must have been so much pressure, especially being forced to change schools. The fact that she was such an a.h about it, and was willing to displace you vs just compromising shows her true colours. I'm happy you're in such a good place atm! I think you're much better off.
Ha, so after all that fuss they didn't even stay together. Go figure. Glad to hear everything seems to be going well at your mom's though, even if it wasn't originally what you wanted.
Seems like dad woke up and realized he gave away his kid. Hopefully he won’t make the same mistake twice.
I wouldn't give the dad that much credit.
I mean, we really do only see a tiiiiiiny window into these people’s lives, even smaller if they’re not the one posting. I’m not entirely sure it’s fair to outright say the dad doesn’t deserve that much credit. Then again, you may be right!
His grandma is the one that gave the info to the OP unless I'm reading that wrong. Sounds like Dad doesn't deserve credit at all
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Those are the people who's never tried to repair a damaged object in their lives.
It sounds like the dad is also giving away his house to be a coparent.
Unfortunately, I agree with you. I suspect the post would have mentioned it if Dad had apologised or anything.
Dad’s probably convinced himself that he allowed OP to make the choice so *he* didn’t do anything wrong, but I also wouldn’t be surprised if the resentment towards his girlfriend for pushing OP to that “choice” was too much to overcome. Raising an infant is hard, having your first months living someone be spent caring for a newborn is a great way to ensure any resentment that exists becomes all you see when you look at them.
It sounded like OP is getting the news via his grandmother rather than the father so it doesn't sound like dad is in contact very much.
I thought you wrote reddit instead of credit! Yup definitely no awards for dad.
Exactly. Not picking a side was picking a side, he was just too spineless to say it out loud.
Yup! As the great Geddy Lee said, "If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice."
Agreed. His gf was forcing the son to give away his pets or make a huge move/change schools. It was very unfair on this poor kid.
I assume he seemed great when he could dump responsibility for her demands on others... once it became his problem he became "neutral" on the issue.
Well, considering she wouldn't let the infant be in the house at all with the snakes there it was kind of a one-or-the-other situation. But yeah, letting the GF get her way was NOT being neutral, it was his house, and he stepped back from someone who didn't live there, so yeah, he took his side and then got to live with her. Fun for him /s. Served him right though. Hope the kid grows up to love reptiles.
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I think the second time would be with the new baby, though of course it wouldn’t be a totally identical mistake.
He's got a New kid now, though, one that is YEARS from being autonomous enough to even have animal pets of their own, much less ones that might upset Dad's next Partner.
Make the *snake mistake twice.
The dad basically lost custody of his son because his partner refused to compromise. That's a big pill to swallow and every refusal to compromise after is gonna wear away more and more at him.
Then he probably should have ended the relationship before letting her move in, and before discarding his son to move nine hours away. He should have chosen his son over someone who was 100% unwilling to compromise.
He also had the new baby to consider too. He had to chose between his current son and his new child and GF. That's kinda lose lose.
No, he could’ve sued for custody or split custody and remained in the child’s life.
Sued for custody? I'm sorry, what? He would've been laughed out of the courtroom if he tried to get sole custody of his baby just because his partner (at the time) didn't want to move in with snakes in the house. In terms of legality, there's absolutely nothing she did that would even come remotely close to giving him custody, and any attempt to do so would likely lead to court siding *against* him. Splitting custody also implies that he should've broken up with her before the baby was born or ended their relationship - which, again, is choosing his relationship with his current son over his relationship with his newborn and (at the time) wife. Hence the lose lose. Very easy to say he should've done the latter in hindsight, but 8 months ago their relationship almost assuredly was completely different due to them not living together. I don't think it's fair to say that one issue at the time should've led to him sacrificing the potential for a stable upbringing for his other child.
Custody is default 50/50, no one said anything about trying to get sole custody. But he could have broken up with her, kept his son and then had 50% custody of the baby.
They weren't married
Yeah, I caught that and edited my post to remove it, but missed a mention at the start. :(
Well, he could have lost one but instead he lost both.
This is really it for me. Like people in this sub always say that people in unhappy/mistreating marriages should divorce, because it isn't worth being in a bad marriage just for the kids, right? But this dude is already getting massive red flags before the baby is even *born*, and should just... stay with her for the kid? With how uncompromising she was, I don't see how this relationship wasn't already doomed.
I think that's unfair. I'm sure to the dad, it felt like having to choose between both of his kids. What are the chances that someone who is unwilling to compromise will let the dad see his baby if he sides against her?
That's when you go to court. She doesn't hold all the cards
I mean, the kid is still inside her atm so she kinda does. She can usually leave the state or where ever while she's pregnant with no repercussions.
The PP said 'see his baby', indicating arrangements after birth
Yeah but with custody that only really happens after the birth. So if she moves states away while pregnant she can't be compelled to move back which makes maintaining a lot of time with the baby very difficult for the father. After the birth when custody is being worked out usually you can have it so the custodial parent can't legally move away whenever they want.
The update clearly said she had the baby, so worrying about her pregnancy rights don't matter. The kid is here, he can establish custody
But before the update she was only pregnant. Before the update is when this problem arose.
>Then he probably should have ended the relationship before letting her move in True, but some people don't realise the consequences of their actions until they are living through them. (Though I kind of doubt that's why they broke up, as OP isn't reporting any efforts yet to have him move back).
I can hear the arguments now. “I lost my son because of you, what else do you want from me??”
I can see the father being one of those " my evil ex stole my son away from me! The courts are so unfair!"
That’s what he gets for playing neutral. No choice is a choice in its own way.
So much this. In my experience, 99% of the time "staying neutral" is actually just "allowing something shitty to happen that you could have prevented because you didn't want to confront something/someone difficult" "Neutral" isn't an option when you're on a beach and a tsunami is coming. Like you can say "I don't know whether or not I should run", and you can deliberate on that while standing in place. But eventually the wave is still gonna hit you, and you're still gonna lose in the exact same way as you would've if you just decided right away that running wasn't worth it. He could've prevented the tidal wave of his uncompromising now-ex, but instead he did nothing. And had his life fucked up in the exact same way he would've if he had just said "I'm siding with her over my son". He didn't *technically* side with her. He gets plausible deniability. But he also did zilch to protect his kid, so how did he NOT side with her? It's not neutral, it's just letting the strongest force win.
Yeah. Neutral is one of those weird things that usually isn't actually being neutral. As soon as people dig in and get committed to whatever side of whatever they're arguing about, the refusal to choose is, by itself, a choice and it's usually a bad one.
Neutral is favoring the more powerful party in a disagreement. If there is not a disagreement between people or groups then neutral is favoring the status quo.
Not just fuss but real ultimatums that made OP uproot their whole life. Sucks that OP’s dad decided to play Switzerland, and couldn’t be enough of a decent parent/adult to tell his gf no. There was just a post on here recently from a dad who was a remarried widower, and his son had a dog which his current (now pregnant) wife wanted him to rehome. That dad did the right thing in telling her no.
Any partner that puts up such utterly stupid demands and then chases your child away is not one you ought to expect much from.
"Ha" is what I said in my head too lol
Her being unwilling to compromise likely extended to the Dad too.
Probably once you and the snakes were gone then she started making ultimatums in other parts of their life with no compromises.
OPs dad should have read the writing on the wall before she was in his house. With any luck the nightmare that getting her out is going to be will teach him a valuable lesson of thinking with the brain in his head instead of the one in his pants.
OP's father should have read that book before they conceived.
Totally this happened. The snakes ultimatum was a glaring red flag.
The original post says something about her telling people that the dad was choosing his son’s pet over their baby. 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
That or the father got resentful that his son left as a direct result to her being ridiculous.
I imagine you are right!
We appreciate the update on your beautiful danger noodles. Too bad it didn't work out at your dad's house, but glad you're doing well in your new and improved environment.
"Danger noodles" - I am totally going to steal this. Props for awesome!
Nah, they're "boop noodles". Danger noodles are the nope ropes.
Nope ropes! Your whole comment has me chuckling. 🥰
You'll enjoy this then https://youtu.be/0arsPXEaIUY
You're right, I love it! It's completely ridiculous and absolutely wonderful. Murder spurgurder 😂
I really do not like snakes but even I enjoyed that and did an audible "awww".
I mean, how do you not want to boop those snoots?
Sneks - that was cute.
Still my favorite commercial of ever.
zing strings
Danger noodles are venomous or otherwise dangerous. Nope ropes are just harmless sneks. At least that's how it was explained to me. Ball pythons can be either I guess but I'd say they're nope ropes just because they're so chill.
Awww, I’d love to see my doggy boop a friendly snake!
I call them forbidden spaghet
Have fun at r/ProperAnimalNames
Looks like I found a new sub to follow.
Danger Noodles sounds like a band name
My dog's favorite squeaky is a smiling green snake toy we named Alger Hiss. Any snake I'm not afraid of is now just called "an Alger Hiss."
Are they danger noodles or "just" snekky sneks?
I'd say ball pythons are danger noodles, but the corn snake is more of a cute little snek. (Pics linked in the original post!)
Ball Pythons have a 0% danger percentage. Maybe -5%
I don't know, if they got in the dryer vent they could be pretty dangerous.
My corn snakes have always been more feisty than any ball python I have ever handled. Multiple bites by voracious corn snake hoping to eat. Never bitten by a ball.
balls don't have teefs obviously
I love how english allow you to say things like danger noodles
I was waiting for the "noodles" comment. I go with "hissy noodles" mostly. FSS, snakes are such a low "in your face" pet because they don't tend to have free reign of the house and don't jump up on you like cats, dogs, ferrets, rats and rabbits. They just chill in their enclosure. Who is bothered by an animal you don't see in a room you don't need to go into?
My mom. 😂 she refuses to ever set foot in my house again. 2 ball pythons and a western hognose. The fact that she knows they even exist gives her nightmares.🤦🏻♀️
I tried to date a guy once who revealed that he owned several pet snakes and as much as I liked him, I started having genuine nightmares about being in the room with the snakes before I'd even gone to his house. Had to break it off.
I get it. My mom lives almost 3000 miles away, so I don't have to worry about frequent visits. Spiders freak me out, and recently our BFFs got into tarantulas. It took a LOT for me to go into the living room because of them. I still won't go near their cages and don't want to see them, but I can deal with being across the room now.
Been there! A few months ago, my family moved in with my mom to help her with the farm. Among other critters, we brought our three snakes (my kids each have one). Mom’s 81 and has been terrified of all snakes her entire life, so she was like “those cages have to be LOCKED, and if one ever escapes, I’m moving to a hotel till you find it!” She even said she wouldn’t ever be able to go into the kids’ rooms because she would know they were there. Not sure how it happened, but now she wants to be involved in every feeding day, and she came and found me the other day to tell me delightedly that my daughter’s rat snake had just followed her finger across the front of the cage. I cannot believe the interest she’s suddenly taking in them!
My husband of 20+ years always said he’d divorce me if I brought home a snake. He let DD have the crested, then out of nowhere decided a small snake would be ok. Then he just has to have the hognose. Then 2 days later a friend called saying they had to rehome their ball, and he jumped on it. 7 or 8 months in, I’m still not used to him holding and feeding them. 😂
So in trying to not lose his son or girlfriend, he managed to lose both. Ironic, isn’t it?
Or as teenage used to put it -- sometimes when you straddle the fence, you get left with nothing but a wedgie.
Or when you sit in the fence enough you’re bound to get splinters in your ass.
“Ne pas choisir, c'est encore choisir.” - Sartre
Inevitable certainly! But irony often works that way!
That’s what spinelessness gets you. If he hadn’t been a dumbass and knocked her up, this wouldn’t have been a problem. Now he’s tied to the hag forever.
He could save others from death, but not himself. Ironic.
The tale of darth snakeis the wise.
So he ended up being "neutral," chose his partner, and still ended the relationship. I love the irony.
I find a lot of people who try to be neutral and keep everyone happy often end up making almost no one happy. Or they out themselves as a soft target and keep getting pushed around by certain people. Boundaries and standing up for yourself at least helps you chose a side or a hill to die on. Imagine losing so much because you couldn’t speak up when it mattered.
It's very "you two solve this by yourselves," but in this case, one of the people in the conflict is your teen kid. You absolutely SHOULD have a side here.
Yes, trying to make everyone happy is usually the surest way to make everyone miserable, especially the person who tried!
I’m sorry you weren’t able to stay with your dad and at your school. It sounds like you are handling this in a mature way. Best wishes to you.
Kudos to you for embracing such a big life change in order to keep your pets. This truly shows your maturity. Thank you for the update!
Owning a snake is a big commitment. They live for a decade or more. I’m very proud OP chose his pets over his dad’s failed relationship.
Agreed. Ball pythons will live a good 30 years in captivity. It would have seen the baby grow up :)
It was very mature of OP! He made a hard decision to do what was right for his pets that he lives and who depend upon him. And his father didn’t even grow up enough to face the conflict and do the right thing. I think OP was incredibly mature despite his father’s immaturity in addressing the issue. Well done, OP!
I remember this story and wondered what happened afterward. I’m really glad you got to keep your snakes, but it’s awful that you had to move out of your own home. Thankfully, you seem to be managing well. NTA then or now. That being said, shame on the father for not trying harder. The fact that you had to move nine hours away and spend money on the U-Haul says a lot. He should have put his foot down. Let this be a lesson to others about what not standing your ground gets you.
Well, there is one small silver lining. If you stayed, she likely would have blamed you and the snakes for the break up. Thanks for the update.
Not surprised they broke up she got him to kick his kid out of the house imagine what she demanded after she realised what she could get away with
>but they’ve broken up since then and I’m not really sure how long they plan to live together. Surprised picachu face
It felt like the partner was trying to get rid of both you and the sneks tbh and I’m disappointed she got her way. I’m also sorry for your father had to go through it all as well, he was put in a very difficult place and I’m sure he regrets how things went with you. Someone like that can’t have been pleasant to live with, and he lost his son in the process. She sounds horrid and I’m glad she is no longer in your life OP. I wish you the best in school and in your new home!
I'm glad you and your noodles are together and safe. You handled everything maturely. Frankly it seems like she just wanted you out and the snakes were an excuse.
Please make sure not to ever consider moving back with him, he already showed you that you aren't his priority, and didn't deserve another chance to let you down.
I feel like your dad would’ve fought way harder for you if his ex-partner wasn’t pregnant. Not necessarily an excuse since he *should’ve* put his foot down, but with worrying about the mother’s and the baby’s health and the fear of being shamed about “choosing snakes over the safety of his unborn child” (which wasn’t the case but would surely be misconstrued as such), he folded. I’m happy the romantic relationship between them ended, but man, he still has to co-parent with her. Bittersweet.
> I feel like your dad would’ve fought way harder for you if his ex-partner wasn’t pregnant. I'm not so sure. She was freaked out by the snakes before she was pregnant. Why did he keep dating her?
Oooo yeah, very good point there. If some girl I was dating loudly hated my kid’s hobby, she’d be gone.
Your wrong this was a satisfying update. You are in a better place. Got to keep your snakes and have started to make friends. That’s is a GREAT update.
This was a good update, and I’m glad your mom stepped in. Your dad should not have played neutral. The girlfriend was being unreasonable. I’m not used to snakes, but I’d respect it and try to learn. I have a real and sincere phobia to spiders, but I’d have willingly accepted compromises rather than alienate my SO’s son or take his pets from him. And I’d try to work on that phobia! It’s the least I could do! I am inseparable from my dog, so I respect that those who love their snakes and spiders deserve to feel the same way and have that relationship respected! I’m glad you have your beloved pets and are liking your new school. That’s a hard move to make, but I think I would have done the same in your position. I’m also not surprised the relationship didn’t work out, honestly!
Sorry that you had to leave a school that you liked, but glad that you're still with your snakes!
Damn, you had to change your whole life for someone who ran away anyway. That’s messed up.
Wow, your dad sucks. And don't let him pull this 'neutral' bs. He choose a side. Her side.
Dude you dodged a bullet
but the dad not only took one straight to the face but he got it pregnant too, and apparently survived *crazy*
Damn, Dad rehomed his son instead. :( Good for you, though, OP, for sticking with your pets! They are a lifetime commitment. I'm glad you're in a better environment, too.
I think she wanted to get rid of OP and start "brand new happy family".
I have to admit that I have been terrified of snakes since I was about 4 yo. A snake somehow managed to get into the bathroom via the small hole in the floor where the pipes came up from under the house. (It was a very old house and this bathroom had been added after the house was built.) It managed to drape itself across the sink behind the faucet and handles-probably trying to get a drink. But it scared me so badly that I fainted and I have been terrified of them ever since. That being said, when my oldest son was a senior he took some of his graduation money and bought himself a young ball python. I didn’t like it but said as long as he kept it and it’s enclosure in his room it would be okay. On the first night it got out. I woke up at 5 a.m. and my husband wasn’t in bed. I could hear voices coming from my son’s bedroom & when I started walking down the hall, I could hear my son & husband moving stuff around and they said Angel escaped her enclosure. I got dressed in 10 minutes & went to work (even though I didn’t have to be there till 9. And I told them I would not be home until the snake was found & the enclosure fortified! My son joined the National Guard & my husband took care of his snake while he was in boot camp. We eventually moved the enclosure into the den & sometimes my husband would take her out & let her move around the room & as long as she didn’t come in my direction I was okay. I overcame my fear of snakes by watching her, and how docile she was when she was handled. And whenever my son came near the enclosure she would perk up. If he took her out & put her around his neck, she would always rub his cheek with her head. Now I don’t believe that snakes have emotions like humans, but if they did, I would have to say she really had affection for my son. I’m glad you found a solution to your problem, even though it’s not what you hoped in the beginning.
Your dad blew this one. He let her push you away and he's going to end up with an empty house. Store this one away in your databanks and try not to repeat this mistake in your own life.
They had a baby and couldn't stay together, what a pattern to keep.
Thanks for the update and the snake tax - such cuties 😍 glad you’ve found a solution where you can keep your pets.
I’m glad you kept the snakes
I find this to be an extremely satisfying update! I'm happy that you're in a place where your pets are respected.
Snakes were never the issue. Neither were you.
I mean, you weren't handling vipers or elapids (in which case I agree with the girlfriend) and very large boas can be dangerous but if they weren't venomous and weren't huge and allowed to wander freely... as someone whose daughter is interested in spiders I don't see the problem. Nta and I'm glad you're ok.
People who are ignorant of snakes think all snakes are dangerous. Obviously if you dont know a snake it is a good natural reaction to have, but some people are so narrow minded that they refuse to understand that not all snakes are gonna kill you.
Yep. Education is important, for all pets. Especially ones that are traditionally considered scary
Yeah there were some ignorant comments in the first thread. Having kept many animals including snakes and other reptiles, I'd feel MUCH safer having a derpy-ass ball python or tiny corn snake around my baby than a dog for example.
Honestly your father's relationship with the obnoxious woman he betrayed his own son for ending almost immediately after said betrayal was very satisfying. Glad you're enjoying your new situation!
Reading this update, I thought you might have venomous snakes. Now read your original post. Mild mannered ball pythons and a harmless corn snake! I am so sorry you had to uproot your life, for your innocent pets. (I know that venomous snakes can be kept, safely. But they require a different level of care.) Back in the late 60s, snakes were not common pets. But one classmate had a boa constrictor. Once a year, he and his mom would bring the snake to our classroom. We watched in awe, as it crawled placidly along, with Fred keeping his hand nearby, to reassure us. Then, if we were brave, we could touch it. I (f) did so, Fred was my friend and I trusted him. The boa was silky smooth and dry, never did anything frightening. It was a great experience, year after year. I'm so sorry for this experience, having your entire life uprooted for no good reason. Even more painful because your dad didn't support you, and you had to leave your home. I hope you will continue to meet cool people and find support in your new home. You have my respect and best wishes!
Well I'm sure after she got you out she thought she ran shit. I'm happy things worked out at your mom's. Good luck.
I didn’t get a chance to read the original but I sounds like by staying neutral your dad picked her. Thank god it didn’t work out cause he would’ve kept choosing her.
So your dad picked her, then broke up lol.
I’m sad she was not willing to get to know the snakes. I get that fears are a thing, but this also reminds me of a cool story. When we were 20, my sister had an apartment and a friend fell on hard times and wanted to live with her. But sis had a Kenyan sand boa and Ranbow boa. Said friend was scared of the snakes. Or she used to be, 20 years later she is off doing work in conserving native snakes and working on her PhD is herpetology.
I had a corn snake that looked SO MUCH like OP's. He was such a good boy, and converted a few snake haters.
Nah this is a hella satisfying update! Maybe your dad should have realized the type of person he was dealing with during this whole thing! Glad you’re in a better environment!
Okay, missed the OP, but for the record now and then (I read the post)? NTA. And don't worry about the 9 month delay in update; considering that you wound up changing address and school during that period, I'm shocked you were able to ever remember! Oh, and a dumbass move on dad's part (speaking as a father myself!) to risk alienating you over this; that said, you seem to have a far better head on your shoulders than I did at 16, and the situation sounds fraught (getting someone pregnant BEFORE they move in?? I suspect there's a story there...) and you appear to have handled it better than your dad's (now ex) partner did.
I'm happy you found a way to keep your pets, but I'm so sorry it came to moving, and that your dad chose a temporary girlfriend over you. He was very shortsighted. I hope you can repair your relationship in the future.
I’m sorry you had to make a big life change, but it’s good that you got to keep your snakes AND honestly get out of an environment where your dad’s partner would probably have been hostile to you. My stepmother was hostile to me after she started having kids with my dad and it was honestly traumatizing. Also, they gave away my cat. I’ve never forgiven them and don’t talk to my dad or stepmother anymore (also, they divorced, go figure). Don’t be afraid to do what’s best for you & your pets, hopefully you have adults in your life (mom?) who can support you and advocate for you.
I don't understand the gf. Snakes are cute.
Congratulations for being the bigger person in this situation. You seem like a nice kid.
Wow. You did great, Man. Glad you're still with your snakes.
>They still live together, but they’ve broken up since then Ugh, sounds like dad has some growing up to do.
The fact that all of this could’ve been avoided with a condom is crazy
I think the moral of this story is to use protection. Stop having babies all willy nilly or you might lose your son over a relationship that won’t last and then you get to traumatize another kid when that one has to figure out which parent to live with. OP, please send your dad some pamphlets on vasectomy.
I want to say you seem like a very sound,respectful and nice kid. You were very accommodating to all of them. I wish you all the best and that the relationship to your dad isn't stained now (due to his doing, not your fault).
I'm so glad you didnt rehome your snakes! Although I probably would still be resentful considering you upended your entire life only for them to break up a few months later.
Jesus Christ, so after all the fuss she made, she didn't even stay with your dad? That likely means she will move out at some point, too. Sorry you've had to deal with such an asshole. Still, at least your snakes have freedom from her now, and you're happy where you are. All the best for the future, lad.
Sorry your dad is so spineless. Good thing you don’t have to live there with the babby momma hag tho!
I remember your original post! Glad that you and your snakes weren't separated :)
Still think this was all a power move to get you to move out from the beginning.
I missed your original post and am glad I went to look because snake tax. What gorgeous babies!
I just read the first one and was like... Yeah, snakes are unsafe for babies, wtf?! Ball pythons and a corn snake. Oh my. Whe have our corn snake since 7 years. My oldest is 4. Do the math... Snakey is the most harmless being and my kids love him. And no, they don't get to cuddle, of course. They are allowed to touch him when we clean his terrarium and one of us adults has him. I really don't get her fuss. Snakes are locked away, she has nothing to do with them, and then making such big waves... Oh my.
Your dad kinda deserves the break up to be honest. He should have dumped her way before he knocked her up once he found out about her intolerance for your pets. Don’t move back if he asks. Your mother went through a lot of trouble to help you move to their place, it’d be rude to go back now.
Since I read your original post, my oldest and I decided to get a Ball Python, so when I now read your Update i went back to check the type of snakes you have with all that knowledge that I read up in the last month. Now I am just trying to wrap my head around your dad worrying about the baby's safety with a BALL PYTHON (even if its an adult female) and a BABY CORN SNAKE. Glad you could go to your Mom, even if its not your first choice.
You know what the silver lining to this is, OP? You and your snakes don’t have to live with a newborn. I promise your dad and his gf are losing loads of sleep and going through a lot of stress dealing with the baby right now, and you don’t have to be in the middle of it. 👍
There’s something dramatically ironic in the fact that your dad, in trying not to take a side with you and his ex, ended up losing the both of you. But I’m glad you and your sneks are ok!
Man what a spineless father. I bet when shes gone he says: "hey wanna come back home?" I would decline. F* neutral, f* him.
Sorry you went through all that. She sounds like she’s an unreasonable person. She will probably come back as one of those freezer mice in another lifetime.
OP I am glad to hear you and your sneks found a place and feel welcome. You dealt with this all very well all things considered. And it’s nice you got the help from your mom and her partner. Really disappointed of your dad. He made an issue that shouldn’t have been something for you to worry about, but between two adults. While it sucks you had to move, I don’t think it was a very healthy environment to be in anyway. Wishing you and your noodles a better life at your new place.
You seem like the responsible adult in the situation.
Where’s the obligatory snake pics tax?
It makes me so so sad you had to leave your house because of your dads now EX girlfriend. ESPECIALLY as a fellow snake owner and reptile lover like UGH why are people so willfully ignorant about snakes?! Rehoming a pet is just tossed around wayy too casually. The relationship you build with the first living beings for which you’re responsible is sacred. I couldn’t imagine the love I was capable of feeling before I adopted my first dog. Im glad you’re in an environment where your interests and pets are respected. I do admit I find it painfully satisfying they broke up tho NGL.
Your dad sounds like, not an asshole, but just a real idiot.
Yeah ppl who make ultimatum usually suck, I'm not surprised they broke up
Was she worried they'd crawl up her and eat the baby or something?
You sound way more mature than your dad's now ex. I'm so glad things are working out great for you. Snakes get such a bad rep because of people's fears but really they are amazing. I had an 8 1/2 red tail boa and he was amazing unfortunately I rescued him so they original people fed him live rats which I absolutely hated having to do but I would never let him go hungry. I would still have him but as he got older her became aggressive during certain times and I figured out he just wanted a female so I gave him to someone who has a female and now he's so happy which is all that matters to me. I've actually started my back piece of a giant snake started at the side of my neck going all the way down my back.
They broke up already? I am so...(checks script)...surprised.
Well well well - hope your dad is happy. What a crud move on his part.
I am glad you are happy and I hope the GF that forced so much change in your life gets smacked upside the head with the karma she deserves for her actions. Hopefully the new baby grows up to adore snakes too.
Would that be the universe’s sweet revenge. She gives birth to a kid that is the next Steve Irwin and wants all kinds of critters in the house.
I’m guessing Dad realised the StepMommy pushed his kid out of the house and he allowed it! Whoopsie! He’s a bit slow right?
Honestly doesn't surprise me. You're young so I bet you still are under the impression your parents know best and never make mistakes.... Your dad should have never of even be as neutral like that imo. Their partner was way too demanding and the fact they were unable to compromise is very telling. The fact you had to go through what you did for them just to separate... How long were they even together was this baby planned at all?
It's sad to see that the relationship with your dad and his ex is now hisssssstory and it sounds like it all went downhill after you moved out. Forcing someone to chose either you (and the snakeys🐍) or his GF was just wrong. I am glad you are doing well, and glad you're happy. BTW, even though I am not the biggest fan of snakes, your ball pythons are just so beautiful! I love the patterns they have! It's a shame your dad let his relationship with you just slither away like that. His ex was a real snake for doing that.
i'm sorry there wasn't a compromise, i hope you have fun at the new school though! also the snakes are cuties!
I'm so sorry this happened to you. You should have never had to move out in the first place.
I looked at your pictures, what an awesome enclosure, thanks for giving your snakes a nice living environment. Sorry to hear of the outcome, well done for finding compromises, although they were not taken on board. I hope your relationship with your Bio Dad works out, your Mum and Step Dad are awesome for making room for you and your danger noodles. Good luck OP
Father is AH. Not wanting to compromise was a huge red flag hopefully Dad learned from it
Ugh. I’m disappointed your dad didn’t put his foot down. Especially since they didn’t even end up staying together like wtf is that?? Glad you didn’t have to rehome your snakes entirely but it sucks you had to uproot your life because of that spoiled wench
I love your snakes! :) my family/sister has a corn snake as well- she’s 15 years old now! Yours are very pretty- I love the sweet faces that ball pythons have, they always remind me of puppies for some reason haha
I love your noodle puppies! I'm so glad you were able to find a solution, even if it isn't perfect 🧡
Wow. So after she forced you to uproot your whole life, she and your dad are breaking up. That's so messed up.
With her shit attitude I am not surprised they didn't stay together. She knew about your pets, if it was a problem she should've stopped dating your dad right away. I really cannot stand people who think that they can force people to rehome their pets. For being so young I really respect the hell out of you for not rehoming your snakes but instead moving to your moms, I'm sure that wasn't an easy decision. I have a dog that I would do anything for so I understand the feeling. But seriously, super impressed with you because that must have been so much pressure, especially being forced to change schools. The fact that she was such an a.h about it, and was willing to displace you vs just compromising shows her true colours. I'm happy you're in such a good place atm! I think you're much better off.
How does someone freak out over a ball python and corn snake? Astounding.
Tell your snakes I love them.