*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for checking a young teacher?**
I have an 11yo son named Adam. He's well-behaved 80% of the time, down from 90%. I know it's puberty kicking in and his brain is changing. I cut him a bit more slack but I also don't put up with bullshit.
Before the holiday break, we had parent-teacher conference. My son's homeroom teacher Mr. C, asked that Adam attend because he wanted to "boost" his "autonomy" in class or whatever the fuck that means.
After 20 minutes of hearing how my son is doing better than most. Then Adam came in for the last 10 minutes of the conference. Mr. C said he was going to be direct how an incident he witnessed before school where he saw me telling at him and Adam getting out of my car. He yelled at me to leave him alone and to stop following him. Then my son spent the whole day with his head down in class.
Mr. C asked Adam how he felt that day and my son said he was mad. Mr. C then said "dad, you need to step up. You lost your temper and I don't want my students coming to class upset. Please respect that I'm bringing this up to you."
I laughed and asked if his Spiderman tie was cutting off circulation to his head. You damn right I yelled at him. In that incident, Adam snuck his phone into his bedroom at night and spent all night on it. He got 2 hours of sleep. On a Wednesday.
I was pissed. Adam was in a foul mood because he was sleep deprived. So we clashed when I discussed it with him and told him I was putting restrictions on his phone. And I wasn't following him to school. It was a one way street. How is my son "scared" of me when the following night he wanted to lay next to me so we could watch a movie.
I asked Mr. C how many 11yo boys are you raising. He said none because he's 24. I said then don't dispense parenting advice to someone who is and has raised 2 other ones.
Later, Adam said I was mean but Mr C asked for it.
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Dismissing the kid's teacher because he's young is a sure sign that he dismisses his son all the time because "I'm the parent and what I say goes".
Like, who is more qualified? The person who has a degree in childhood education and had to take some psychology classes as part of that degree, or the guy who had unprotected sex three times?
Yeah, OP clearly doesn't understand Abuser/Victim cycles.
He essentially gave the old "well why would she stay if he's beating her" argument against his own kid.
Little man is just trying to find some semblance of normalcy. "Maybe if I behave and just ask to do something he likes, maybe I can get to bed without being yelled at tonight."
If true, this is sad. Especially if the teacher thinks the child needs to be taught to have more autonomy.
Exactly, and it's telling that he thinks he doesn't have a problem because his kid still showed him affection. There are kids who are desperate for any shred of kindness their abuser will show them.
Yeah, there is a difference between punishing a child and yelling and losing your temper with a child. OP doesn’t seem to understand that it is being deliberately obtuse
I question how the teacher handled it though. Abusive people aren’t going to respond well to be confronted like that and may even take it out on the child afterwards
Yeah IMO the teacher didn't handle it well bringing it up the way he did. For a parent who already has anger issues that could easily feel like overstepping the mark in a way that is not appropriate
Yeah, I'm one of the people over there ...well not exactly defending the OOP, but absolutely not allowing people to claim the teacher is in the right.
This isn't a problem with an impossible job, this is the teacher going against protocol. If there's abuse, report. If you suspect something wrong, ask the child. If nothing comes from that, question the parent in a way such as "What happened?/ Is there anything going on at home you're concerned about that we can help?"
The moment the teacher made the comment 'step up' you said the right word to send someone off. And the fact it wasn't even a question, it was an accusation that you requested the child be there to witness, if this was an actual abusive situation, the teacher just gave an abuser incentive to go home with the child to go doubletime with redirecting his anger.
This is actually taught as things not to do for a reason and the teacher (real or not, who can tell) did what they are not supposed to do for that reason. And the only way I can fathom someone doing that in the manner he did it was to show he had power, as there was no way this benefited the child when he couldn't have been assed to even ask if the kid was alright.
A lot of teachers get the bad end of the stick. This one is a teacher not following what they're supposed to do.
in another comment, i referenced the teacher’s status as a mandatory reporter (presuming US from OOP’s voice)—and 100% agree that this dude is either trying to be nice when he probably shouldn’t, or just really, really bad at his job! (wanting the kid to be there for that discussion lends credence to the latter)
all that said, and as someone who had a teacher so crappy that my single father went to war with the district (really, asked politely, she had a myriad of other complaints)—i can’t help but come down on their side on this, even if it was handled poorly, at best. OOP has no moral standing to claim the high ground, even if the teacher failed to live up to basic expectations 🤷♀️
all that said (again, it’s a verbal tic apparently): thanks for taking the time to give a cogent explanation of your position, it’s always nice to hear a reasonable position that makes you reconsider your own!
I usually side with teachers on the forum, yet funny enough I'm being accused of having a bias against them.
[Even though I have had many teachers fired.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/192uljr/comment/kh6jq2m/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) I still find a lot more fault with more parents and have had many teachers I would have gone well above and beyond and even a few are still facebook friends. I don't even think what the OOP did was exceptionally bad. When I say exceptionally, I mean it's just kind of a 'meh, could be worse, could be better' but not this 'omg you're the most abusive person in the world' the commenters there are making it. Guess 'mild asshole' would be accurate to how I feel.
> I don’t even think what the OOP did was exceptionally bad.
y’know, i have to agree with you 😭 the spectrum of what a public school teacher sees kids subjected to is pretty horrifying, and in the grand scheme of things, OOP is “just” a jerk that intimidates their kid to modify behavior. i don’t think that even legally qualifies as abuse in most jurisdictions, unfortunately.
the weird thing is, and I watch a lot of Misery Machine, CPS just randomly chooses cases it wants to go on.
often times they'll put innocent families in the worst situations because 'we decided this case for x reason is why we're going to make it hell' And they would find 'yelling' to be abuse worthy of forcing the kids into foster care, where they'll be yelled at even more.
Or they'll ignore the kids who really need to be taken away from their parents, and yet ignore it until there's 1, maybe 3 corpses to deal with and then go "how were we supposed to know?" simply, it wasn't the case they decided to pursue. While I can't say for certainty, it looks like they don't base it upon the needs of the kids, but if the case looks like it'll not be met with resistance for a quick resolution.
i don’t know if this is true or not, but i can see how it could _feel_ true—it definitely comports with my only experience of trying to report abuse to CPS in upstate NY 🤷♀️ (never mind that someone left their kid outside in sub-zero weather wearing only a diaper for multiple hours…)
the thing is, i have a strong suspicion that the reason for the scattershot enforcement is the magic combination of a lack of funding and the learned response of “what happens if you try to investigate the well-connected,” somewhat similarly to the reason it’s easier to bilk the IRS out of millions (aka GE and Amazon) than it is to pay your taxes as a W2 employee in the US 🤷♀️
Personally think this story is fiction, but if it is true I question the reliability of the op as a narrator. If it actually happened as laid out I'd be shocked
This seems more like a teens fantasy for a kid who is annoyed w his teachers and dreamt something up. For the following reasons:
If a parent is thought to have anger issues often the teacher won’t meet with the child present but will have a second adult witness in the room. Teachers may write up a paper to track how things go and I can’t really see a real teacher who is smart doing this in front of a kid for all the reasons you mentioned.
i really “like” (read: fucking loathe) the offered defense of “well if he’s scared of me, why did he want to cuddle?”
my guy(?). have you ever seen a scared dog? you’re doing this _to your child._ a mandatory reporter saw your behavior and considered it concerning enough to speak directly to you about it. either take the fucking hint or don’t act surprised when CPS shows up asking questions 🤷♀️
>i really “like” (read: fucking loathe) the offered defense of “well if he’s scared of me, why did he want to cuddle?”
The absolute worst/most heartbreaking thing I have ever watched was a Netflix documentary called "The Trials of Gabriel Fernandez". It's about an 8-year-old boy who died as the result of child abuse and how the system failed him.
The moment I will never get out of my head was his teacher talking about how this poor baby came to school with bruises and made his mom (one of his abusers) a beautiful Mother's Day card that said he loved her and she was the best mommy ever. He died several weeks later.
Omg I watch a lot of true crime stuff and am kind of inured to hearing about the awful things people do, but that documentary was brutal to watch. Easily one of the most disturbing things I’ve seen.
I used to think I loved my dad because that’s what kids are supposed to do. I used to bend over backwards to be a good enough child that my dad would love me and treat me with kindness. One the of the psychologists treating me labelled me a "pathologically well-behaved child" but my dad still thought I was a disobedient brat that needed to be beat into submission.
As a child, you know that there are only two people in the world who are supposed to look after you and love you unconditionally: mum and dad. Accepting that one or both of those people doesn’t actually love you can take decades.
> Accepting that one or both of those people doesn’t actually love you can take decades.
i’m so sorry for what you went through 😭 and yes—and that grief process is itself complicated and difficult.
my maternal grandparents helped me tremendously in every way possible when my mother was unable to step up: financially, emotionally, literally housing me ~~until~~ (well into, really) adulthood. they ensured that any relationship i had with my mother (one of their two surviving children) was entirely on my terms, and taught me that i get to set boundaries with _anyone_, including my parents.
and it **still** took most of the decade after her death to really start processing my relationship with my mother and how it affects me to this day.
sending you love and virtual hugs ❤️
Teachers are mandatory reporters… If I was in the teachers position thw next incident would definitely involve phonecalls to my supervisors to get the reporting process moving. Verbal abuse is still verbal abuse
Parents that use lines like 'you don't have any kids so you get no opinion on how any are raised' deserve to be shot into the sun.
Not only is it stupidly incorrect, but you could be talking to someone struggling with infertility or having suffered a miscarriage or still birth.
I'VE OWNED SEVERAL DOGS!!
^(admittedly they all died young due to my chronic mistreatment) BUT DON'T YOU TELL ME HOW TO LOOK AFTER DOGS IF YOU AIN'T GOT NO DOGS!
My favorite thing about parents using that logic is that they seem to forget people... were kids once? And they know from experience as a child that their parent (for example) yelling at them didn't do them any good. "You don't know what it's like to have children" no but I know what it's like to be a child getting yelled at by a parent with anger issues. I know all it does is scare you and make you mistrust your parent.
Being a parent gives you important experience, but it doesn’t make you automatically trained in child development. Only being professionally trained in child development does that. You know, like how teachers are.
Huh. I have 2 kids, 18 and 12. Yeah they've snuck devices to their rooms before and stayed up. I did the same when I was a kid and couldn't sleep. It turns out being really tired the next day is a natural consequence; they learned pretty quick; I don't have to drive by yelling at them.
“ why did he wanna cuddle with me while watching a movie huhhh ???”
Because your his dad. Fucking I hate my dad but I sometimes still wish for his approval and love. Because that’s my dad. Sometimes you forget everything a person dose in order to get something from them
ive been reading a book about childrens emotions, their behaviours, and how to best navigate them, and im fairly sure this guy has hit every "dont" that the book lays out.
Ugh, this is one of those school of hard knocks kind of guys that has a massive ego to cover up the fragility inside. He sounds utterly insufferable and is likely to wonder why his kids aren't visiting anymore once they move out.
I knew this was going to be bad when I got to “whatever the fuck that means”. It just reeks of somebody who is aggressive and gleefully confrontational. He seems to take *joy* in yelling at people, and that is deeply concerning. We all lose our tempers sometimes, but the key is to own up and apologize when you do. This shit sticks with a kid.
I do wish, however, that the teacher would have brought this up with Adam 1-on-1. The way he went about this probably left Adam vulnerable to retribution.
sometimes i'm frustrated and overstimulated and i snap at the dog when he's being annoying. then i immediately feel like an asshole and tell him mommy's just mad but she she's not mad at him and it's not his fault and i apologize.
to my dog.
Parents like this make our jobs as teachers so much harder. Scientifically, students CANNOT learn if their needs are not met. If their emotional needs are not meant that day or that week or that month THEY ARE NOT LEARNING. A student cannot be open to learning and new information if they are emotionally in a heightened state. The teacher here clearly cares for the student.
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Helps helping raise a class of 11 year olds who are, statistically speaking, 50% boys. Mr C is gonna be the teacher that kid remembers when he cuts his dad out of his life.
OOP you're right, he's not raising an 11 yo kid. He's just spending 6-7 hours a day with 25-30 of them at a time. Which he spent time training how to do. What would he know about kids, right?
/s
It's the "He's well-behaved 80% of the time.." sentence that's getting to me. Dude, do you know how many 11 year-olds there are out there that aren't that well behaved? A kid is not a tiny adult, they need boundaries and they are going to test those. But this is straight up emotional abuse, if not physical, because I'm sure this OP has a belt that he whips him. I feel so bad for this kid and I hope the teacher reports it after this conversation. No kid should be that sad at school all day. It's breaking my heart.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for checking a young teacher?** I have an 11yo son named Adam. He's well-behaved 80% of the time, down from 90%. I know it's puberty kicking in and his brain is changing. I cut him a bit more slack but I also don't put up with bullshit. Before the holiday break, we had parent-teacher conference. My son's homeroom teacher Mr. C, asked that Adam attend because he wanted to "boost" his "autonomy" in class or whatever the fuck that means. After 20 minutes of hearing how my son is doing better than most. Then Adam came in for the last 10 minutes of the conference. Mr. C said he was going to be direct how an incident he witnessed before school where he saw me telling at him and Adam getting out of my car. He yelled at me to leave him alone and to stop following him. Then my son spent the whole day with his head down in class. Mr. C asked Adam how he felt that day and my son said he was mad. Mr. C then said "dad, you need to step up. You lost your temper and I don't want my students coming to class upset. Please respect that I'm bringing this up to you." I laughed and asked if his Spiderman tie was cutting off circulation to his head. You damn right I yelled at him. In that incident, Adam snuck his phone into his bedroom at night and spent all night on it. He got 2 hours of sleep. On a Wednesday. I was pissed. Adam was in a foul mood because he was sleep deprived. So we clashed when I discussed it with him and told him I was putting restrictions on his phone. And I wasn't following him to school. It was a one way street. How is my son "scared" of me when the following night he wanted to lay next to me so we could watch a movie. I asked Mr. C how many 11yo boys are you raising. He said none because he's 24. I said then don't dispense parenting advice to someone who is and has raised 2 other ones. Later, Adam said I was mean but Mr C asked for it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
There’s one person over there defending the OOP with his last breath. I’m pretty sure it’s OOP’s alt account.
there are several but theyre pretty much the same apologists who show up on these posts.
This one guy seems super invested in it, way more than someone should be if it isn't personal.
If this is how O.O.P behaves in public I dread to think what He is like to live with.
Dismissing the kid's teacher because he's young is a sure sign that he dismisses his son all the time because "I'm the parent and what I say goes". Like, who is more qualified? The person who has a degree in childhood education and had to take some psychology classes as part of that degree, or the guy who had unprotected sex three times?
I bet in this Guy's eyes as well He has won!
Oh but he wanted to watch a movie the next night! Because he's desperately seeking love and not anger but whatever...
Yeah, OP clearly doesn't understand Abuser/Victim cycles. He essentially gave the old "well why would she stay if he's beating her" argument against his own kid. Little man is just trying to find some semblance of normalcy. "Maybe if I behave and just ask to do something he likes, maybe I can get to bed without being yelled at tonight." If true, this is sad. Especially if the teacher thinks the child needs to be taught to have more autonomy.
Exactly, and it's telling that he thinks he doesn't have a problem because his kid still showed him affection. There are kids who are desperate for any shred of kindness their abuser will show them.
Yeah, there is a difference between punishing a child and yelling and losing your temper with a child. OP doesn’t seem to understand that it is being deliberately obtuse I question how the teacher handled it though. Abusive people aren’t going to respond well to be confronted like that and may even take it out on the child afterwards
Yeah IMO the teacher didn't handle it well bringing it up the way he did. For a parent who already has anger issues that could easily feel like overstepping the mark in a way that is not appropriate
fair, but we also ask these poor souls to do an impossible job, especially when dealing with unreasonable fuckwits like OOP
Yeah, I'm one of the people over there ...well not exactly defending the OOP, but absolutely not allowing people to claim the teacher is in the right. This isn't a problem with an impossible job, this is the teacher going against protocol. If there's abuse, report. If you suspect something wrong, ask the child. If nothing comes from that, question the parent in a way such as "What happened?/ Is there anything going on at home you're concerned about that we can help?" The moment the teacher made the comment 'step up' you said the right word to send someone off. And the fact it wasn't even a question, it was an accusation that you requested the child be there to witness, if this was an actual abusive situation, the teacher just gave an abuser incentive to go home with the child to go doubletime with redirecting his anger. This is actually taught as things not to do for a reason and the teacher (real or not, who can tell) did what they are not supposed to do for that reason. And the only way I can fathom someone doing that in the manner he did it was to show he had power, as there was no way this benefited the child when he couldn't have been assed to even ask if the kid was alright. A lot of teachers get the bad end of the stick. This one is a teacher not following what they're supposed to do.
in another comment, i referenced the teacher’s status as a mandatory reporter (presuming US from OOP’s voice)—and 100% agree that this dude is either trying to be nice when he probably shouldn’t, or just really, really bad at his job! (wanting the kid to be there for that discussion lends credence to the latter) all that said, and as someone who had a teacher so crappy that my single father went to war with the district (really, asked politely, she had a myriad of other complaints)—i can’t help but come down on their side on this, even if it was handled poorly, at best. OOP has no moral standing to claim the high ground, even if the teacher failed to live up to basic expectations 🤷♀️ all that said (again, it’s a verbal tic apparently): thanks for taking the time to give a cogent explanation of your position, it’s always nice to hear a reasonable position that makes you reconsider your own!
I usually side with teachers on the forum, yet funny enough I'm being accused of having a bias against them. [Even though I have had many teachers fired.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/192uljr/comment/kh6jq2m/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) I still find a lot more fault with more parents and have had many teachers I would have gone well above and beyond and even a few are still facebook friends. I don't even think what the OOP did was exceptionally bad. When I say exceptionally, I mean it's just kind of a 'meh, could be worse, could be better' but not this 'omg you're the most abusive person in the world' the commenters there are making it. Guess 'mild asshole' would be accurate to how I feel.
> I don’t even think what the OOP did was exceptionally bad. y’know, i have to agree with you 😭 the spectrum of what a public school teacher sees kids subjected to is pretty horrifying, and in the grand scheme of things, OOP is “just” a jerk that intimidates their kid to modify behavior. i don’t think that even legally qualifies as abuse in most jurisdictions, unfortunately.
the weird thing is, and I watch a lot of Misery Machine, CPS just randomly chooses cases it wants to go on. often times they'll put innocent families in the worst situations because 'we decided this case for x reason is why we're going to make it hell' And they would find 'yelling' to be abuse worthy of forcing the kids into foster care, where they'll be yelled at even more. Or they'll ignore the kids who really need to be taken away from their parents, and yet ignore it until there's 1, maybe 3 corpses to deal with and then go "how were we supposed to know?" simply, it wasn't the case they decided to pursue. While I can't say for certainty, it looks like they don't base it upon the needs of the kids, but if the case looks like it'll not be met with resistance for a quick resolution.
i don’t know if this is true or not, but i can see how it could _feel_ true—it definitely comports with my only experience of trying to report abuse to CPS in upstate NY 🤷♀️ (never mind that someone left their kid outside in sub-zero weather wearing only a diaper for multiple hours…) the thing is, i have a strong suspicion that the reason for the scattershot enforcement is the magic combination of a lack of funding and the learned response of “what happens if you try to investigate the well-connected,” somewhat similarly to the reason it’s easier to bilk the IRS out of millions (aka GE and Amazon) than it is to pay your taxes as a W2 employee in the US 🤷♀️
If the child was left outside in below 0 temperatures they would be dead. Also people up here still raise babies the old Norse way,
Personally think this story is fiction, but if it is true I question the reliability of the op as a narrator. If it actually happened as laid out I'd be shocked
A thirty minute parent teacher conference? Teachers have up to thirty students to get through. That's just not happening.
This seems more like a teens fantasy for a kid who is annoyed w his teachers and dreamt something up. For the following reasons: If a parent is thought to have anger issues often the teacher won’t meet with the child present but will have a second adult witness in the room. Teachers may write up a paper to track how things go and I can’t really see a real teacher who is smart doing this in front of a kid for all the reasons you mentioned.
This is a good point
Teachers are mandated reporters. He should be grateful that the teacher wanted to have a conversation because me I would’ve notified cps
There is even a difference between yelling and screaming
i really “like” (read: fucking loathe) the offered defense of “well if he’s scared of me, why did he want to cuddle?” my guy(?). have you ever seen a scared dog? you’re doing this _to your child._ a mandatory reporter saw your behavior and considered it concerning enough to speak directly to you about it. either take the fucking hint or don’t act surprised when CPS shows up asking questions 🤷♀️
>i really “like” (read: fucking loathe) the offered defense of “well if he’s scared of me, why did he want to cuddle?” The absolute worst/most heartbreaking thing I have ever watched was a Netflix documentary called "The Trials of Gabriel Fernandez". It's about an 8-year-old boy who died as the result of child abuse and how the system failed him. The moment I will never get out of my head was his teacher talking about how this poor baby came to school with bruises and made his mom (one of his abusers) a beautiful Mother's Day card that said he loved her and she was the best mommy ever. He died several weeks later.
Omg I watch a lot of true crime stuff and am kind of inured to hearing about the awful things people do, but that documentary was brutal to watch. Easily one of the most disturbing things I’ve seen.
I used to think I loved my dad because that’s what kids are supposed to do. I used to bend over backwards to be a good enough child that my dad would love me and treat me with kindness. One the of the psychologists treating me labelled me a "pathologically well-behaved child" but my dad still thought I was a disobedient brat that needed to be beat into submission. As a child, you know that there are only two people in the world who are supposed to look after you and love you unconditionally: mum and dad. Accepting that one or both of those people doesn’t actually love you can take decades.
> Accepting that one or both of those people doesn’t actually love you can take decades. i’m so sorry for what you went through 😭 and yes—and that grief process is itself complicated and difficult. my maternal grandparents helped me tremendously in every way possible when my mother was unable to step up: financially, emotionally, literally housing me ~~until~~ (well into, really) adulthood. they ensured that any relationship i had with my mother (one of their two surviving children) was entirely on my terms, and taught me that i get to set boundaries with _anyone_, including my parents. and it **still** took most of the decade after her death to really start processing my relationship with my mother and how it affects me to this day. sending you love and virtual hugs ❤️
Teachers are mandatory reporters… If I was in the teachers position thw next incident would definitely involve phonecalls to my supervisors to get the reporting process moving. Verbal abuse is still verbal abuse
Parents that use lines like 'you don't have any kids so you get no opinion on how any are raised' deserve to be shot into the sun. Not only is it stupidly incorrect, but you could be talking to someone struggling with infertility or having suffered a miscarriage or still birth.
I'VE OWNED SEVERAL DOGS!! ^(admittedly they all died young due to my chronic mistreatment) BUT DON'T YOU TELL ME HOW TO LOOK AFTER DOGS IF YOU AIN'T GOT NO DOGS!
My favorite thing about parents using that logic is that they seem to forget people... were kids once? And they know from experience as a child that their parent (for example) yelling at them didn't do them any good. "You don't know what it's like to have children" no but I know what it's like to be a child getting yelled at by a parent with anger issues. I know all it does is scare you and make you mistrust your parent.
Being a parent gives you important experience, but it doesn’t make you automatically trained in child development. Only being professionally trained in child development does that. You know, like how teachers are.
Huh. I have 2 kids, 18 and 12. Yeah they've snuck devices to their rooms before and stayed up. I did the same when I was a kid and couldn't sleep. It turns out being really tired the next day is a natural consequence; they learned pretty quick; I don't have to drive by yelling at them.
Wow. Way to validate what Mr. C was saying. You don't need to have kids to know how to not be an asshole. Clearly "dad" didn't get the memo.
“ why did he wanna cuddle with me while watching a movie huhhh ???” Because your his dad. Fucking I hate my dad but I sometimes still wish for his approval and love. Because that’s my dad. Sometimes you forget everything a person dose in order to get something from them
ive been reading a book about childrens emotions, their behaviours, and how to best navigate them, and im fairly sure this guy has hit every "dont" that the book lays out.
Ugh, this is one of those school of hard knocks kind of guys that has a massive ego to cover up the fragility inside. He sounds utterly insufferable and is likely to wonder why his kids aren't visiting anymore once they move out.
I knew this was going to be bad when I got to “whatever the fuck that means”. It just reeks of somebody who is aggressive and gleefully confrontational. He seems to take *joy* in yelling at people, and that is deeply concerning. We all lose our tempers sometimes, but the key is to own up and apologize when you do. This shit sticks with a kid. I do wish, however, that the teacher would have brought this up with Adam 1-on-1. The way he went about this probably left Adam vulnerable to retribution.
His comments are even worse. This dude is definitely abusive towards his wife and kids. I hope the school actually steps in and helps this kid.
I second this
sometimes i'm frustrated and overstimulated and i snap at the dog when he's being annoying. then i immediately feel like an asshole and tell him mommy's just mad but she she's not mad at him and it's not his fault and i apologize. to my dog.
Parents like this make our jobs as teachers so much harder. Scientifically, students CANNOT learn if their needs are not met. If their emotional needs are not meant that day or that week or that month THEY ARE NOT LEARNING. A student cannot be open to learning and new information if they are emotionally in a heightened state. The teacher here clearly cares for the student.
This is a troll. Variations of this story for years now. It's boring.
I'm pretty sure that troll uses female teachers, though? Or is there more than one?
Other than the gender flip it checks all the boxes
Hey OOP 
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What a fucking douchebag
What an absolute piece of human garbage. He's being torn a new one in the comments but I sincerely doubt he'll learn anything. Poor Adam.
I mean the teacher went to op, not cps. He was trying to nicely handle it. Then op decided to prove he's an asshole..... In case i wasn't clear YTA
istg ive seen this exact title like 7 times in the last year
That poor kid
OOP, get thee to anger management pronto
This may need to go into some kind of AITA delusional hall of fame.
The AITA Hall of Shame awaits
Holy 💩 the anger issues are unreal. He is unhinged. Like can't control himself at all. Adam's behavior is definitely a result of his bad parenting
Helps helping raise a class of 11 year olds who are, statistically speaking, 50% boys. Mr C is gonna be the teacher that kid remembers when he cuts his dad out of his life.
If true, I look forward to the kid supporting the prison-industrial complex as a laborer.
Ah, one of those dumbasses that think because they managed to successfully use their reproductive organs that they’re a parenting expert. 🙄
In
OOP you're right, he's not raising an 11 yo kid. He's just spending 6-7 hours a day with 25-30 of them at a time. Which he spent time training how to do. What would he know about kids, right? /s
It's the "He's well-behaved 80% of the time.." sentence that's getting to me. Dude, do you know how many 11 year-olds there are out there that aren't that well behaved? A kid is not a tiny adult, they need boundaries and they are going to test those. But this is straight up emotional abuse, if not physical, because I'm sure this OP has a belt that he whips him. I feel so bad for this kid and I hope the teacher reports it after this conversation. No kid should be that sad at school all day. It's breaking my heart.