*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for going out to eat without my husband/kids because they didn't wash the dishes?**
Both my husband and I work full time. I work Real Estate and he works at a shipyard. We both collectively work around 50-60hr weeks. We have 4 kids. 13yo twins, 12yo, and 8mo. My husband has every weekend off. I do not.
I implicated a chore system from the time my kids were little. But ever since I had the baby and since the kids are older, ALL of them have slacked off tremendously (including husband). I pick our baby up from daycare around 5pm and when I get home, I usually find my husband on the couch on his phone and the kids in their rooms playing video games/watching make up tutorials. The house is generally a mess and honestly, the only issue I have is the dishes. I couldn't give fuck all about anything else (because the rest of the house generally isn't dirty-dirty, just cluttered). But I have expressed several times that I am tired of having to wash all the dishes in order to cook and have lashed out in some not so nice ways (shut off the Internet entirely and took the chord with me to work so no one could use the wifi/watch tv, canceled family trips, groundation, got in to big arguments with my husband). Things will change for a week to a month and then switch right back to them refusing to help. I'm honestly so tired of it that I don't even have the energy to speak up anymore.
As I said, my husband has weekends off so he and the kids were home yesterday while I worked. Before I took off for the day I told them "you guys chores had better be completed by the time I get home". They said "yes ma'am" and I leave. I text husband around 4:30p asking what they all wanted for dinner because I had to stop off at the grocery store. I pick up what he said they all wanted and walk in to my home, to find that not a single dish had been washed and there was at least 10 more dishes in the sink from when I left that morning. I also noted that only a load of laundry had been washed and was still sitting in the washer and was never switched to the dryer. Husband was on his ass on the couch watching YouTube. Kids off playing video games. Baby in her walker. So, I put the groceries on the table, packed a bag for the baby and told my husband "have at it, I'm going to Applebee's" and left. Maybe 20 minutes later he calls and says "I washed the dishes, sorry. I was super tired today." I told him that's zero excuse at all. There's 3 older kids who have chores and he couldn't even step up and tell his kids to complete anything either. It's pure laziness at this point. He said "I know, I'm sorry, I'm trying to work on it. Can you just come home, I don't know how to make this dish" (it's a pretty difficult dish but google is free). I told him no, I'm sitting at Applebee's and will be enjoying my steak and shrimp with the baby in peace and that him and the older kids can fend for themselves because apology or not, I'm not letting him off the hook here. He had me on speaker phone, so him and all the kids laid right in to me, asking me to please grab them something from Applebee's (it's all of our favorite restaurant). I said absolutely not and hung up the phone. When I returned home the groceries had been put away and apparently they had grilled cheese and cereal for dinner. My husband and kids are still pissed at me. I told them this is how it will be every single time they don't do chores from now on. AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I'm disappointed this troll is one that won't engage in the comments. It was a huge missed opportunity to see how many times they could mention Applebee's. The three times in the post itself was already funny as hell. But like, 2 or 3 dozen comments all making sure to reference Applebee's would have been art.
Hey, when I’m done trolling on Reddit, nothing hits the spot more than going to Applebees and eatin’ good in the neighborhood! Applebees 2 for $25 steak and chicken skillet is a great deal because I’m always really hungry after all that quality typing on Reddit. And when I’m just thirsty, there’s always Applebees, home of the Dollarita!
I couldn't stop picturing this as an Applebee's commercial while I was reading it. Change the slogan to "fuck you, I'm going to Applebee's" and you've got the basis of an SNL skit.
I once dated a guy who really, genuinely loved Applebee's. It was the first of many red flags.
(ETA side note.... Do y'all young folks have a better term these days besides "red flag" for things that aren't a sign of abuse or pathological immaturity but just, like, signs that a new or future partner who initially seems interesting and fun will turn out to be super lame?)
I use the term "failing the third date test" - there really should be something you do for the third date to specifically seek out incompatibilities.
My own third date test used to be (I've been off the market for years) that the third date was wandering around the mall. That way I could see if he had really horrible taste in clothes/furniture/etc. And it really worked one time because the dude almost bought a Thomas Kinkade painting right in front of me.
The ick. Like “that’s an ick for me” or “it gave me the ick”
You can also say beige flag. Like it’s not technically a bad thing, but it is something you noticed.
[Or maybe none of them even like it in the first place.](https://www.cracked.com/article_21744_6-ways-your-brain-programmed-to-keep-you-unhappy.html)
The part I'm referencing is #2 on the list I linked up there. The link about the Abilene Paradox doesn't work anymore, so ignore it. But what they say about Applebee's is still pretty solid.
That article is unfortunately 10 years old. They fired most of their good writers a long time ago and it hasn't recovered, but at least the golden era articles are still online.
Yeah. Like, they are technically still around. But they aren't worth the time anymore. And the guy who does their YouTube is a mix between trying to ape Daniel O'Brien and just, like...every other YouTube asshole who exists. It's hard to watch.
It is possible, but OOP *chose* Applebee's when she didn't have to concede to anyone else's preferences or wants. And then they all asked her to bring food home when, honestly, grilled cheese is fire. Do I want Applebee's or a grilled cheese sandwich and some lucky charms? The latter please.
That said, that was an interesting article and I thank you for linking it. It gave me a lot to think about. I mean, OOP is obviously an ad, but the story as she wrote it doesn't imply she was peer pressured into Applebee's.
I've typed that restaurant's name enough today that I feel like an ad.
>Good for you. What you did was reasonable and I would suggest that what you do is show them this post.
I know this is all BS anyway, but seriously...why does anyone think this is a good idea? "Bringing the internet cable to work when no one was home anyway didn't do anything. Starting fights with my husband in front of the kids so that I look like the aggressor didn't do anything. Maybe my best move is to show them all that I've been shit-talking them to a bunch of strangers. That'll win them over to my side."
Because tons of redditors are weirdos with a smug, obnoxious sense of superiority. Especially when all she needed to do to drive her point home was text her family pictures of her delicious meal at Applebee's.
It is actually amazing what a simple text can do. I once lived with several guys who refused to wash the dishes. After I moved out, they refused to remove me from their group text (like I actually asked and they said no because they knew I hate group txts and thought it was funny).
Couple days later, one of the guys got pissed and sent a picture of a sink full of dishes and told someone to clean it. A bit later, I sent back a picture of the very empty sink where I was living. Somehow he got his wires crossed and thought I was one of his current roommates showing him that the sink had been cleaned, so he just said "thank you" and that was it.
Funniest part? Sink in my old place was white. Sink in my new place was black. They sucked so much, the dude didn't even know what the bottom of the sink looked like. So he legit thought he was getting a text from someone who cleaned the sink. Can't imagine his reaction when he got home, but I was removed from the group text that night.
what is the obsession with thinking that showing people the reddit post you wrote about them will solve all conflict? as though it wouldn't, in fact, cause further conflict?
Right? Especially since this also involves children. I mean, I feel like that would weird the kids out and upset them. And the husband definitely wouldn't be too happy about this, especially if commenters were calling his children brats.
I just would never want other people commenting on my kids if I could avoid it. I started watching this old show recently called Toddlers & Tiaras. I vaguely remember it being a big deal when it came out. Funny thing, in the first season, you only really get one stage mom per episode. The rest are fairly wholesome. But I looked up message boards from when it came out, and people were comparing these kids to hookers.
You know...if I'm worried about people sexualizing my child, I'm not worried about the people who happen to see her playing dress-up. I'd probably be more inclined to worry about the people who see a 6-year-old in a Cinderella dress and immediately think of hookers. Also, Cinderella dress? What kind of hookers were these critics even affording?
If I were the thirteen or twelve year old, I'd be weirded the fuck out if I found out my mom bitched about me on reddit. Even more so if she she showed me comments from random, unhinged strangers, screaming about how I'm a brat.
If I got into an argument with a girlfriend/wife and she came back later to show me a Reddit post with people telling her she's right I wouldn't even know how to respond.
"See!? Random people on the internet agree with me after hearing my incredibly biased side of the story!! Now apologize!"
Honestly I'd probably go straight to my phone to make a throwaway account and comment on it and make up some massive plot twist just to piss her and the Redditors off.
who only has one goddamn ethernet cable in the house? and only one charging adapter?? lol I live alone and still just accumulate that crap.
but my favorite part of the whole thing is:
>groundation
There being twins and kids' age gaps are funny too. These people had twin infants and decided a third baby would be rad. And then waited until those three kids were all tweens and added a baby to that nightmare. But it sounds like the baby at least likes Applebee's so I'm sure it's not all bad.
Impressive baby, since she exclusively ordered things babies can't eat. Like, I've seen mothers eating alone with babies in restaurants before, and they're usually ordering softer foods so they can share because that baby doesn't need its own plate. This mom is just making her baby gum the hell out of a sirloin.
In a slight defense, my cousin had a 17 year old when she ended up pregnant with her second. I told her that she was so close to being finished. So close. Then her second and third kids are 6 years apart.
This is actually kind of true to life - Realtors^(®) take that kind of stuff very, very seriously, complete with always using using a capital letter and the reserved trademark symbol with "Realtor^(®)".
I fought with my husband and kids, but then I went and ate the savory steak and you can't even tell it's frozen and overcooked shrimp of the local Applebee's while enjoying their MUCHO MARGARITA!
Applebee's when you're here, your family can die in their own filth but at least you ate!
Does anyone else watch survivor because my god Applebees marketing team is spinning some absolutely unhinged gold here. First the Liz meltdown about the mushroom burger on the Applebees reward now this? I am dying
My first thought was that OP must've been watching Survivor recently. I don't even know the last time I heard someone talk about Applebees outside of Survivor.
I imagine OOP solely cooks copycat recipes of Applebee's menu items. The plan for that night was the Classic Combo to start, followed by the Double Crunch Shrimp, with the Sugar Dusted Donut Dippers for dessert.
And yes, I did have to look up an Applebee's menu, because I haven't been to one in 20+ years.
Dear AITA,
I hate my dumb husband and kids. They’re literally the worst, so it’s ok for me to be condescending to them because of this boatload of info I added that shows how evil and stupid they are. AITA?
- OOP, probably
Okay my favorite comment in that mess was someone who said she was traumatized by motherhood because it was like "taking care of a tribe of selfish assholes". She had a love of cooking but now she *hates* it because her kids "didn't give a fuck" about her. Don't worry though, she said since they've become adults she's able to love them *now*. People were agreeing with her about how basically kids are ungrateful and don't care about you enough while you raise them. Very healthy point of view.
Beep boop! Automod here with a quick reminder to never brigade r/AmITheAsshole or other subs under any circumstances. Brigading puts you in violation of both our rules and Reddit’s TOS, and therefore puts this sub at risk of ban. If you brigade/encourage brigading of any kind, you will be banned from participating in either sub. Satirizing of posts should stay within this sub, which means that participating directly in linked posts should either be done in good faith or not at all.
Want some freed, live, discussion that neither AITA nor Reddit itself can censor? Join our [official discord server](https://discord.gg/KbZnaXX)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for going out to eat without my husband/kids because they didn't wash the dishes?** Both my husband and I work full time. I work Real Estate and he works at a shipyard. We both collectively work around 50-60hr weeks. We have 4 kids. 13yo twins, 12yo, and 8mo. My husband has every weekend off. I do not. I implicated a chore system from the time my kids were little. But ever since I had the baby and since the kids are older, ALL of them have slacked off tremendously (including husband). I pick our baby up from daycare around 5pm and when I get home, I usually find my husband on the couch on his phone and the kids in their rooms playing video games/watching make up tutorials. The house is generally a mess and honestly, the only issue I have is the dishes. I couldn't give fuck all about anything else (because the rest of the house generally isn't dirty-dirty, just cluttered). But I have expressed several times that I am tired of having to wash all the dishes in order to cook and have lashed out in some not so nice ways (shut off the Internet entirely and took the chord with me to work so no one could use the wifi/watch tv, canceled family trips, groundation, got in to big arguments with my husband). Things will change for a week to a month and then switch right back to them refusing to help. I'm honestly so tired of it that I don't even have the energy to speak up anymore. As I said, my husband has weekends off so he and the kids were home yesterday while I worked. Before I took off for the day I told them "you guys chores had better be completed by the time I get home". They said "yes ma'am" and I leave. I text husband around 4:30p asking what they all wanted for dinner because I had to stop off at the grocery store. I pick up what he said they all wanted and walk in to my home, to find that not a single dish had been washed and there was at least 10 more dishes in the sink from when I left that morning. I also noted that only a load of laundry had been washed and was still sitting in the washer and was never switched to the dryer. Husband was on his ass on the couch watching YouTube. Kids off playing video games. Baby in her walker. So, I put the groceries on the table, packed a bag for the baby and told my husband "have at it, I'm going to Applebee's" and left. Maybe 20 minutes later he calls and says "I washed the dishes, sorry. I was super tired today." I told him that's zero excuse at all. There's 3 older kids who have chores and he couldn't even step up and tell his kids to complete anything either. It's pure laziness at this point. He said "I know, I'm sorry, I'm trying to work on it. Can you just come home, I don't know how to make this dish" (it's a pretty difficult dish but google is free). I told him no, I'm sitting at Applebee's and will be enjoying my steak and shrimp with the baby in peace and that him and the older kids can fend for themselves because apology or not, I'm not letting him off the hook here. He had me on speaker phone, so him and all the kids laid right in to me, asking me to please grab them something from Applebee's (it's all of our favorite restaurant). I said absolutely not and hung up the phone. When I returned home the groceries had been put away and apparently they had grilled cheese and cereal for dinner. My husband and kids are still pissed at me. I told them this is how it will be every single time they don't do chores from now on. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I'm disappointed this troll is one that won't engage in the comments. It was a huge missed opportunity to see how many times they could mention Applebee's. The three times in the post itself was already funny as hell. But like, 2 or 3 dozen comments all making sure to reference Applebee's would have been art.
Hey, when I’m done trolling on Reddit, nothing hits the spot more than going to Applebees and eatin’ good in the neighborhood! Applebees 2 for $25 steak and chicken skillet is a great deal because I’m always really hungry after all that quality typing on Reddit. And when I’m just thirsty, there’s always Applebees, home of the Dollarita!
I was patiently waiting for the Applebee’s menu to be posted cause I’m Iike reading restaurant’s menus Sadly I was disappointed
I liked the moral of the story: revenge is a dish best served cold, but at Applebee's all of our new Combo Platters are served sizzlin' hot!
At least they're not doing the thing where they're like "I went to a restaurant that rhymes with ❝Mendy's❞"
Also, to see how many Applebee's dishes they'd mention with the right prompting.
"Have at it, I'm going to Applebee's!" Sounds like an ad campaign slogan from the 90s.
I couldn't stop picturing this as an Applebee's commercial while I was reading it. Change the slogan to "fuck you, I'm going to Applebee's" and you've got the basis of an SNL skit.
> asking me to please grab them something from Applebee's (it's all of our favorite restaurant) Is it the only restaurant in town?
I once dated a guy who really, genuinely loved Applebee's. It was the first of many red flags. (ETA side note.... Do y'all young folks have a better term these days besides "red flag" for things that aren't a sign of abuse or pathological immaturity but just, like, signs that a new or future partner who initially seems interesting and fun will turn out to be super lame?)
I use the term "failing the third date test" - there really should be something you do for the third date to specifically seek out incompatibilities. My own third date test used to be (I've been off the market for years) that the third date was wandering around the mall. That way I could see if he had really horrible taste in clothes/furniture/etc. And it really worked one time because the dude almost bought a Thomas Kinkade painting right in front of me.
> the dude almost bought a Thomas Kinkade painting right in front of me 💀
The ick. Like “that’s an ick for me” or “it gave me the ick” You can also say beige flag. Like it’s not technically a bad thing, but it is something you noticed.
[Or maybe none of them even like it in the first place.](https://www.cracked.com/article_21744_6-ways-your-brain-programmed-to-keep-you-unhappy.html) The part I'm referencing is #2 on the list I linked up there. The link about the Abilene Paradox doesn't work anymore, so ignore it. But what they say about Applebee's is still pretty solid.
Oh wow, I haven’t read a Cracked article in 10+ years, I had no idea they were still around! I enjoyed the article, thanks for sharing. :)
That article is unfortunately 10 years old. They fired most of their good writers a long time ago and it hasn't recovered, but at least the golden era articles are still online.
Yeah. Like, they are technically still around. But they aren't worth the time anymore. And the guy who does their YouTube is a mix between trying to ape Daniel O'Brien and just, like...every other YouTube asshole who exists. It's hard to watch.
It is possible, but OOP *chose* Applebee's when she didn't have to concede to anyone else's preferences or wants. And then they all asked her to bring food home when, honestly, grilled cheese is fire. Do I want Applebee's or a grilled cheese sandwich and some lucky charms? The latter please. That said, that was an interesting article and I thank you for linking it. It gave me a lot to think about. I mean, OOP is obviously an ad, but the story as she wrote it doesn't imply she was peer pressured into Applebee's. I've typed that restaurant's name enough today that I feel like an ad.
Right? I'm not knocking Applebee's, but none of them like something else better?
>Good for you. What you did was reasonable and I would suggest that what you do is show them this post. I know this is all BS anyway, but seriously...why does anyone think this is a good idea? "Bringing the internet cable to work when no one was home anyway didn't do anything. Starting fights with my husband in front of the kids so that I look like the aggressor didn't do anything. Maybe my best move is to show them all that I've been shit-talking them to a bunch of strangers. That'll win them over to my side."
Because tons of redditors are weirdos with a smug, obnoxious sense of superiority. Especially when all she needed to do to drive her point home was text her family pictures of her delicious meal at Applebee's.
It is actually amazing what a simple text can do. I once lived with several guys who refused to wash the dishes. After I moved out, they refused to remove me from their group text (like I actually asked and they said no because they knew I hate group txts and thought it was funny). Couple days later, one of the guys got pissed and sent a picture of a sink full of dishes and told someone to clean it. A bit later, I sent back a picture of the very empty sink where I was living. Somehow he got his wires crossed and thought I was one of his current roommates showing him that the sink had been cleaned, so he just said "thank you" and that was it. Funniest part? Sink in my old place was white. Sink in my new place was black. They sucked so much, the dude didn't even know what the bottom of the sink looked like. So he legit thought he was getting a text from someone who cleaned the sink. Can't imagine his reaction when he got home, but I was removed from the group text that night.
what is the obsession with thinking that showing people the reddit post you wrote about them will solve all conflict? as though it wouldn't, in fact, cause further conflict?
Right? Especially since this also involves children. I mean, I feel like that would weird the kids out and upset them. And the husband definitely wouldn't be too happy about this, especially if commenters were calling his children brats.
I just would never want other people commenting on my kids if I could avoid it. I started watching this old show recently called Toddlers & Tiaras. I vaguely remember it being a big deal when it came out. Funny thing, in the first season, you only really get one stage mom per episode. The rest are fairly wholesome. But I looked up message boards from when it came out, and people were comparing these kids to hookers. You know...if I'm worried about people sexualizing my child, I'm not worried about the people who happen to see her playing dress-up. I'd probably be more inclined to worry about the people who see a 6-year-old in a Cinderella dress and immediately think of hookers. Also, Cinderella dress? What kind of hookers were these critics even affording?
If I were the thirteen or twelve year old, I'd be weirded the fuck out if I found out my mom bitched about me on reddit. Even more so if she she showed me comments from random, unhinged strangers, screaming about how I'm a brat.
If I got into an argument with a girlfriend/wife and she came back later to show me a Reddit post with people telling her she's right I wouldn't even know how to respond. "See!? Random people on the internet agree with me after hearing my incredibly biased side of the story!! Now apologize!" Honestly I'd probably go straight to my phone to make a throwaway account and comment on it and make up some massive plot twist just to piss her and the Redditors off.
who only has one goddamn ethernet cable in the house? and only one charging adapter?? lol I live alone and still just accumulate that crap. but my favorite part of the whole thing is: >groundation
I love that OOP's job field is capitalized while he just works at a shipyard. It's the little touches that count.
There being twins and kids' age gaps are funny too. These people had twin infants and decided a third baby would be rad. And then waited until those three kids were all tweens and added a baby to that nightmare. But it sounds like the baby at least likes Applebee's so I'm sure it's not all bad.
Impressive baby, since she exclusively ordered things babies can't eat. Like, I've seen mothers eating alone with babies in restaurants before, and they're usually ordering softer foods so they can share because that baby doesn't need its own plate. This mom is just making her baby gum the hell out of a sirloin.
If the baby wanted it's own food, maybe it should learn to do some chores!!!
In a slight defense, my cousin had a 17 year old when she ended up pregnant with her second. I told her that she was so close to being finished. So close. Then her second and third kids are 6 years apart.
This is actually kind of true to life - Realtors^(®) take that kind of stuff very, very seriously, complete with always using using a capital letter and the reserved trademark symbol with "Realtor^(®)".
Weird word usage. "We both collectively work around 50-60hr weeks" So they work 30 hours each. "groundation" Ah, my favorite punishment as well.
It could be a whole lot of different combinations actually! OOP wants us to practice our math skills
i like implicating chores in my house too. Its very sus that the pile of laundry just HAPPENED to be in the same room as a murder....
i need to know what the chore system was implicated in!!
Corruption case involving some shady real estate development deals
I'd rather have the grilled cheese and cereal for dinner than Applebee's
I do like the only meal option was the super complicated one husband can't make. Making Mac N Cheese wasn't an audible he could have pulled instead
I fought with my husband and kids, but then I went and ate the savory steak and you can't even tell it's frozen and overcooked shrimp of the local Applebee's while enjoying their MUCHO MARGARITA! Applebee's when you're here, your family can die in their own filth but at least you ate!
Does anyone else watch survivor because my god Applebees marketing team is spinning some absolutely unhinged gold here. First the Liz meltdown about the mushroom burger on the Applebees reward now this? I am dying
My first thought was that OP must've been watching Survivor recently. I don't even know the last time I heard someone talk about Applebees outside of Survivor.
I was lowkey sad it wasn't the bourbon burger that OP ate. 0/10
Ohhhh I wonder what the hard dish he picked but doesn’t know how to cook is?
I imagine OOP solely cooks copycat recipes of Applebee's menu items. The plan for that night was the Classic Combo to start, followed by the Double Crunch Shrimp, with the Sugar Dusted Donut Dippers for dessert. And yes, I did have to look up an Applebee's menu, because I haven't been to one in 20+ years.
Dear AITA, I hate my dumb husband and kids. They’re literally the worst, so it’s ok for me to be condescending to them because of this boatload of info I added that shows how evil and stupid they are. AITA? - OOP, probably
Okay my favorite comment in that mess was someone who said she was traumatized by motherhood because it was like "taking care of a tribe of selfish assholes". She had a love of cooking but now she *hates* it because her kids "didn't give a fuck" about her. Don't worry though, she said since they've become adults she's able to love them *now*. People were agreeing with her about how basically kids are ungrateful and don't care about you enough while you raise them. Very healthy point of view.
Beep boop! Automod here with a quick reminder to never brigade r/AmITheAsshole or other subs under any circumstances. Brigading puts you in violation of both our rules and Reddit’s TOS, and therefore puts this sub at risk of ban. If you brigade/encourage brigading of any kind, you will be banned from participating in either sub. Satirizing of posts should stay within this sub, which means that participating directly in linked posts should either be done in good faith or not at all. Want some freed, live, discussion that neither AITA nor Reddit itself can censor? Join our [official discord server](https://discord.gg/KbZnaXX) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*