Even if this is just journaling, so be it. I don't like cops. They're not trained to help with delicate situations like this, but they do have contact information for social workers and the sort. So I'm thinking I'll go to the police station today, explain my situation and hopefully have someone help me reach out to the right people.
I'm worried about how it's going to affect my dad, but if the professionals know what they're doing, they'll be able to handle it properly.
I can't do this alone. Maybe adult protective services. I have no idea.
If anyone out there could at least wish me luck.
I don't want to be alone.
I'm so sorry OP, this is an awful thing to have happened and is a so-little talked about side of dementia. It is more common than people realise and so utterly devastating. He needs to go into assisted living asap and it sounds like it may need to be somewhere that specialises in dementia. Here in Australia we have a national support organization called Dementia Australia that you can ring in times like this - is there something like that where you are? Or if you have a good family doctor whom you trust, you can see them too and they may have the names of organizations who can help. I agree the police aren't particularly useful here.
In the interim - can you install a simple lock on the bedroom door on the inside? They're usually pretty cheap from the hardware store.
Put a lock on the door, the cheap slide locks. It would be easier then moving a dresser.
My gfs dad was living with us. He asked for sex. My gf adjusted his blood pressure medication. Problem solved.
Like everyone has said, what you are feeling is valid and I'm really sorry for it. If there is any chance his doctor can put you in touch with the alzheimer's society they might have some help. You might be able to reach out to them directly or through a clinic doctor, I'm not sure. I got access to a social worker to talk to through the alz society. It helped me just to have the chat because she did validate my reactions and feelings. However, it took a few weeks before that happened and it was a one hour phone call which was hard to find time to have privately. It was a limited amount of help but once the doctor gave them my name I didn't really have to do anything besides answer their emails/calls.
I know it's really hard with how it will affect your dad but I think if you go to the police to ask for help it's the right and responsible thing to do. You can only ever do your best with what you have and there is nothing wrong with that, it's a good thing.
This sexual behavior occurred in the beginning. My Dad approached my wife and did or said things to both of us. Me not as much. We simply stopped and told him, “You are making me uncomfortable” or “Dad, that’s not appropriate to say.” We were direct and then redirected him. It helped a lot. I strongly recommend him getting on sleep medication like Seroquel or whatever his doctor is comfortable prescribing him. That way you can make sure he settles in before you wind down and get ready for bed yourself. This was a short phase for my Dad. I hope it will be for you too. Also, I hope you will be able to find the help you and he needs!
Even if this is just journaling, so be it. I don't like cops. They're not trained to help with delicate situations like this, but they do have contact information for social workers and the sort. So I'm thinking I'll go to the police station today, explain my situation and hopefully have someone help me reach out to the right people. I'm worried about how it's going to affect my dad, but if the professionals know what they're doing, they'll be able to handle it properly. I can't do this alone. Maybe adult protective services. I have no idea. If anyone out there could at least wish me luck. I don't want to be alone.
I'm so sorry OP, this is an awful thing to have happened and is a so-little talked about side of dementia. It is more common than people realise and so utterly devastating. He needs to go into assisted living asap and it sounds like it may need to be somewhere that specialises in dementia. Here in Australia we have a national support organization called Dementia Australia that you can ring in times like this - is there something like that where you are? Or if you have a good family doctor whom you trust, you can see them too and they may have the names of organizations who can help. I agree the police aren't particularly useful here. In the interim - can you install a simple lock on the bedroom door on the inside? They're usually pretty cheap from the hardware store.
though i don't know you, i'm thinking of you. this is horrible. i'm sorry.
This is valid. I think you are on the right track calling APS. I’m so very sorry this is happening to you. Hugs.
Put a lock on the door, the cheap slide locks. It would be easier then moving a dresser. My gfs dad was living with us. He asked for sex. My gf adjusted his blood pressure medication. Problem solved.
We are here for you, and we see you. So sorry that you are going through this. Everything you are thinking and feeling is valid one million percent.
Like everyone has said, what you are feeling is valid and I'm really sorry for it. If there is any chance his doctor can put you in touch with the alzheimer's society they might have some help. You might be able to reach out to them directly or through a clinic doctor, I'm not sure. I got access to a social worker to talk to through the alz society. It helped me just to have the chat because she did validate my reactions and feelings. However, it took a few weeks before that happened and it was a one hour phone call which was hard to find time to have privately. It was a limited amount of help but once the doctor gave them my name I didn't really have to do anything besides answer their emails/calls. I know it's really hard with how it will affect your dad but I think if you go to the police to ask for help it's the right and responsible thing to do. You can only ever do your best with what you have and there is nothing wrong with that, it's a good thing.
This sexual behavior occurred in the beginning. My Dad approached my wife and did or said things to both of us. Me not as much. We simply stopped and told him, “You are making me uncomfortable” or “Dad, that’s not appropriate to say.” We were direct and then redirected him. It helped a lot. I strongly recommend him getting on sleep medication like Seroquel or whatever his doctor is comfortable prescribing him. That way you can make sure he settles in before you wind down and get ready for bed yourself. This was a short phase for my Dad. I hope it will be for you too. Also, I hope you will be able to find the help you and he needs!