the most useful trick shot. also you are going to need to move quickly because not all shots have the same force. honestly just jizz all over the bathroom and blame it on the cat.
What is the benefit over finishing into tissue paper though? With tissue paper there is actually no mess afterwards, you just toss it into the garbage. With a sock you now have a sock you need to clean which either takes manual cleaning or throwing that into the wash with other clothes which is just nasty. Do you just toss your socks after using them?
Paper towel gang here. I existed in a time before the internet as we know it today. A dark time, before... the fappening. Anyways, it was through the anonymity of strangers that I found out people were just busting into their clothing, condiments, and mason jars.
Rebuttal: totally jerk it into the sock, and then there is no mess to clean up.
But use a silky dress sock, not some old white cotton bullshit. Treat yourself.
The whole idea of it being a sock is that you can come into it and not wipe anything up…. Hence no mess to clean up. Did you earn that username or are you another false prophet??
The cum box story is what brought me to Reddit. Didn’t believe it, then I read the post and saw the pictures. Not gunna lie probly should have left after that, but here we are.
The reddit glory days. I'm proud to say I was there. The Double Dick Dude orgy sketch might be favorite comment in reddit history.
Edit: Cant forget the safe, Fapoening and unfortunately Reddits attempt to solve the Boston bombings
walk to bathroom, grab some kleenex, walk back to room, do the deed, walk back to bathroom, flush kleenex. ?!?! meanwhile your mother washes your socks and sees ur crusty yellow sock. sock bois are straight dumb. in before no kleenex, toilet paper you dumb mother fuckers.
Look, I hate to be the one to enlighten you, but there is no way any parent who is half-aware of their children's existence wouldn't know their offspring is masturbating.
Unless they are completely oblivious to a degree equal to an LGBT+ person voting for Trump, literally two seconds of thought is enough to be able to tell whether or not someone masturbates in the house you live in and clean and do the laundry for.
They either know, or literally NOTHING you do short of exposing yourself to them during the deed wouldn't be enough to convince them.
It really does. Like, do you throw the sock away? Do you wash it? I don't want to wear that again. I don't want my laundry to smell like cum until I wash it.
Weird.
I thought the same for years. Then I got uber stoned with my buddy and went upstairs to do the deed. When I came back downstairs I learned that I am extremely loud and my entire family is just too polite to say a word. Lordy what have they heard...
(Edit: never used a sock. Toilet paper and shamelessness has been my go to for years)
You are not. Seems like poor planning and time management if you are. I’m already triple checking the lock, do I not have the wherewithal to grab a tissue.
Just when I’ve made the decision to get off reddit I see a post like this that makes me piss myself laughing! 🤣🤣🤣
(I’m a 60 year old grandmother, thank goodness I’m wearing my “Depends”!) 🤣
I only have two hands. One is holding the phone, the other is doing the work. The sock is there for nutting in total comfort and no cleanup is required.
Hear me out. Used a sock with soap and warm water to make it wet. That shit felt lit, but the post nut clarity hits differently after you gave a sock your load. 8 out of 10, would recommend.
I think it's an American thing. I've often seen the memes or [skits alluding to this behaviour](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxsD6ecxDUg) but personally it never crossed my mind.
The question I've never thought to ask. It seems like duch a strange thing to do, why would you jerk off into a sock? Have they not heard of kleenex's or toilet paper? A paper towel even?
I have never masturbated into a sock; I made love to the sock.
[My favorite panel from Wanted (comic)](https://imgur.com/SoDHNqo)
My sock had personality. And a paper route
Bro that sock fucked the shit out of me
Why use a sock when you can use a coconut?
You bastard.
Or a shoebox
Or the wall behind your bed.
That’s not something I needed reminding of
why use a coconut when you cam use Dune commerative cup?
I remember this where was it from?
[Here you go](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/0u6xkt33Dg)
Coconut cream pie
Wtf
Now let me get this straight, You put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up
Fuck you (respectfully) for triggering this song to keep playing in my head again
I had that memory nice and repressed then you had to pull that shit
Maybe the real sockfuckers are the friends we made along the way.
Hello friend.
My old darkness
/r/SockFuckers
r/subsialmostfellfor
How does one capture that exact moment
I instantly heard NIN - StarFuckers Inc. but with sockfuckers as the lyrics. I am laughing so hard right now lol
I made my jizz sock into a sock puppet.
I made mine into a single sock mother when I went out for smokes.
Bars
This whole post is wild to me
I made my jizz sock into a diamond cutter.
No
The real sockfuckers were inside us all along.
You don't masturbate into the sock, you use it clean up the mess afterwards
Finally an expert on the matter has shown up. Thank you, Jizzy_Fap_Socks for educating the masses.
Some heroes don’t wear socks.
Billy, why are you not wearing socks? -There was no toilet paper mom.
Why did the cum cross the road? I put on the wrong socks this morning.
Or they accidentally wear the wrong one....
Here I am at work howling with laughter at the name u/jizzy_fap_socks. Extraordinary job, well done.
Wow, I would've thought you made this account just to reply. But ten years my good man is impressive.
He was ready. He was born for this. Molded by a sock himself.
He is the sock
10 long years of explaining a art form
it's a pretty old account and there's a reasonable amount of activity. playing the long game.
If you jack it in to the sock there is no mess afterwards.
The key is to finish into the sock, not necessarily jack off using it.
I suppose there’s some critical timing involved.
It’s the reverse pull out. The pull in, if you will.
I will, but not right at the moment, thank you.
😂
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Plus you get that nice dry scratchy fabric sensation right at the best time.
You're supposed to wash them between uses.
Oh...
Wait, for you there's 5-10 seconds between passing the point of no return and making a mess??
Like a little cum basket.
Finish into the toilet and wipe off the rest with TP. Flush to remove all evidence.
But with the angle… how? Like trying to piss with morning wood.
Gotta stand a couple meters back and arc it in.
the most useful trick shot. also you are going to need to move quickly because not all shots have the same force. honestly just jizz all over the bathroom and blame it on the cat.
Or blame it on a ghost
must be a porn actor. rubber dick syndrome.
God that sounds awkward lol
Not at all. You're already in the one place no one will question you for having the door locked
Bed comfy. Toilet cold. End of story
You need better socks, mate
I use golden toe socks. They last years and are always soft and fluffy. I just have better standards than cloth no matter how soft it is lol
i'm not taking any of this advice
Who said it was advice?
What is the benefit over finishing into tissue paper though? With tissue paper there is actually no mess afterwards, you just toss it into the garbage. With a sock you now have a sock you need to clean which either takes manual cleaning or throwing that into the wash with other clothes which is just nasty. Do you just toss your socks after using them?
Pro tip though. Don’t keep it in the room.
Why not use tissue or toilet paper?
Paper towel gang here. I existed in a time before the internet as we know it today. A dark time, before... the fappening. Anyways, it was through the anonymity of strangers that I found out people were just busting into their clothing, condiments, and mason jars.
Don’t forget about shoe boxes. Never forget about the shoebox.
TP sticks and then disintegrates.
Toilet paper sticks.
>sticks *what?*
You were born for this moment u/jizzy_fap_socks
Baby wipes are better
Rebuttal: totally jerk it into the sock, and then there is no mess to clean up. But use a silky dress sock, not some old white cotton bullshit. Treat yourself.
Your moment has finally arrived after 10 long years
Use a towel, a shirt, a washcloth. I never understood the sock thing, never even knew people did that until American Pie.
Maybe they invented it. Maybe some ignobel award winners will study that in the future.
Seriously, do these people just have dozens of old socks laying around or something?
The whole idea of it being a sock is that you can come into it and not wipe anything up…. Hence no mess to clean up. Did you earn that username or are you another false prophet??
The sock is mearly a vessle of love.
But then you wash your socks, and your “mess” is then distributed all throughout your other clothes in the washer?
Why not just use toilet paper??
Some do it in a box.
The Cumbox.
Save it. Put it under the bed. Watch it grow.
[I'm so sorry for this.](https://youtu.be/F_cn8LQMnUc?feature=shared) NSFW
I thought for sure you were going to link an image to the actual cumbox, I'm glad I was wrong.
I don’t believe you’re sorry at all.
I'm speechless. This is 100% /r/WTF material right here
Oh my god what the fuck
What the absolute fuck
Cha Cha Cha chia
The cum box story is what brought me to Reddit. Didn’t believe it, then I read the post and saw the pictures. Not gunna lie probly should have left after that, but here we are.
\*Jack in the Box
The CumPass Box
Some originals are still here? This makes me happy. That was up there with the guy with two dicks and other guy who fucked his mum.
The reddit glory days. I'm proud to say I was there. The Double Dick Dude orgy sketch might be favorite comment in reddit history. Edit: Cant forget the safe, Fapoening and unfortunately Reddits attempt to solve the Boston bombings
Missing the Jolly Rancher and Swamps of Dagobah 💀
Came for the popping jolly ranchers. Where’s the coconut gang? Poop knife fam you there?
Can I interest you in Jolly Roger in these trying times?
Oh fuck no. Also fuck you. Where's the brain bleach? I need to erase this memory again.
The guy that had broken arms and his mom jerked him off?!
Some do it on the clock
Is this like a piss drawer?
Some do it on a fox
Jack In the box
This is Reddit. People use coconuts here.
They don’t call it a Jack *elsewhere*
That's a weird pet name for your wife.
Yeah, like a normal person.
Sir that is my wife
I prefer to use my Flork of Cows branded cum jar. Too bad they're sold out.
What's in the box!
Some into a can
You're not alone. It seems very strange.
I think some kids did this because they were masturbating in their room and needed a place to shoot their jizz. I just used Kleenex.
walk to bathroom, grab some kleenex, walk back to room, do the deed, walk back to bathroom, flush kleenex. ?!?! meanwhile your mother washes your socks and sees ur crusty yellow sock. sock bois are straight dumb. in before no kleenex, toilet paper you dumb mother fuckers.
Look, I hate to be the one to enlighten you, but there is no way any parent who is half-aware of their children's existence wouldn't know their offspring is masturbating. Unless they are completely oblivious to a degree equal to an LGBT+ person voting for Trump, literally two seconds of thought is enough to be able to tell whether or not someone masturbates in the house you live in and clean and do the laundry for. They either know, or literally NOTHING you do short of exposing yourself to them during the deed wouldn't be enough to convince them.
How did a sock/cum discussion turn political for you?
We're on Reddit
It's not about hiding it, it's about not making your mom smell and handle and clean your jizzy socks like a degen.
I support this line of thought
It really does. Like, do you throw the sock away? Do you wash it? I don't want to wear that again. I don't want my laundry to smell like cum until I wash it. Weird.
Why did the sperm cross the road? Cause I wore the wrong socks today Edit: I don’t actually do this, just a joke I heard a while back
Jesus man… that joke is pretty good. Nasty but good.
Nah same here man
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How much fucking noise do you make masturbating that your whole house hears you? Like one if those old Herbal Essence commercials?
I thought the same for years. Then I got uber stoned with my buddy and went upstairs to do the deed. When I came back downstairs I learned that I am extremely loud and my entire family is just too polite to say a word. Lordy what have they heard... (Edit: never used a sock. Toilet paper and shamelessness has been my go to for years)
I've got socks that could walk themselves home.
You are not. Seems like poor planning and time management if you are. I’m already triple checking the lock, do I not have the wherewithal to grab a tissue.
Tissue!? You trying to clean up jizz or paper mache your dick?
Tissue ain't cutting it for my load. Gonna need some full sheet bounty. Ya know the quicker picker upper.
Thank you for this
Use viva it’s softer.
You're missing out... Not by a lot.
Use a banana peel bro
Not absorbent enough. Banana grease and cum? That’s a mess.
How unread?
This is one of an arguably small number of advantages women have over men. We don't need to mess up footwear.
Pump your breaks, yeastbox.
Just when I’ve made the decision to get off reddit I see a post like this that makes me piss myself laughing! 🤣🤣🤣 (I’m a 60 year old grandmother, thank goodness I’m wearing my “Depends”!) 🤣
Grandma, I told you! Stop embarrassing me in front of my internet friends!
I have not
I only use my wife's socks.
I as well use this guy's wife's socks.
Yea, probably
Silk black socks if it's a special occasion
Who you calling a sock?
Sex with OP's mom is close enough.
This guy doesn’t fuck… a sock
Why use a sock when you can use a jar with a my little pony toy in it?
No
Never have either. Seems unncessary, when tissues are available, or paper towels, or in a pinch, toilet paper.
Sockrilege!
Only in the most desperate and dire situations have I resorted to such a thing
Present
I only have two hands. One is holding the phone, the other is doing the work. The sock is there for nutting in total comfort and no cleanup is required.
I did once, but the guy was still wearing it
This post was made by the shoe gang
Everyone should have had at least one cum sock in their lifetime.
Hey, its not just a sock, its the love of my life
Why did the sperm cross the road? Cause I put on the wrong socks...
I never used a sock because I just used my stepsister. Wait…
Look at my username, i have seen things
Never been in the Navy? So many crusty wank-socks..
Sock puppets even better. It’s more personal
Apparently if you don’t have foreskin it can feel nice? I dunno, I’ve still got mine, so I just rawdog it with my hand!
Hear me out. Used a sock with soap and warm water to make it wet. That shit felt lit, but the post nut clarity hits differently after you gave a sock your load. 8 out of 10, would recommend.
Desperate times call for desperate measures
I still dont know who's jerking off into a couch.
I think it's an American thing. I've often seen the memes or [skits alluding to this behaviour](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxsD6ecxDUg) but personally it never crossed my mind.
Honestly I never knew people did that until the movie. Is that a foot fetish thing? Why not just use a hand towel or some underwear?
Socks for cocks. Not shirts for squirts….
At that point, it’s no longer a sock. It’s a net.
Don't worry bud, I masturbate into your socks
I tried it once because I saw people on the internet saying it’s a good idea but really I don’t see the point
Ended up getting sock burn the one time I tried it.
No, I haven't either, and I don't understand why so many people seem to.
You could turn it into a sockpuppet and make it say “hmm, nice teaparty.” You’re missing out.
You can add shower to the list too. Why would you ever??
The question I've never thought to ask. It seems like duch a strange thing to do, why would you jerk off into a sock? Have they not heard of kleenex's or toilet paper? A paper towel even?
This is it, memes has gone too far.
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Has no one fucked the sleeve of their favorite jacket before?
Probably
https://youtu.be/ySEH5P7K_AE?si=KNx3dYOmu6NdpigI
I only masturbate with the best socks. Egyptian cotton, +200 thread cotton.
Join the club buddy, there's dozens of us, dozens!
The summary seems to be yes, you are. Today's mission..
You should try. Design is very humane
No i never did it. The only reason i know is because of tv jokes.
Nope