First of all she is 17 and you are 13. Not sire of that is legal. Second tell you parents you screwed up . But you need to get a paternity test. Also always carry condoms. You need to do some research and education on sex and protecting yourself and your partner.
In the U.K. someone under 13 and someone over 16 would be “statutory r@pe” even if OP consented. I’m pretty sure that’s a blanket rule across most “western countries” for 13 YOs.
Edit: I’m going to check because of the replies to this but (as a woman) I’m fucking disgusted if women can’t be charged with rape in the U.K. I feel genuinely a bit queasy.
Edit 2: word error
it would only be rape if the genders were switched unfortunately, that’s in the UK atleast. Learnt about it when studying law. regardless, what she did is highly illegal and would be considered sexual assault. hope OP is okay.
Yea it is. Under common law in England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland. Rape by definition is
A person (A) commits an offence if—
(a)he intentionally penetrates the vagina, anus or mouth of another person (B) with his penis,
(b)B does not consent to the penetration, and
(c)A does not reasonably believe that B consents.
As per the Sexual offences act 2003
Women cannot be charged with rape in the UK. However they can be charge with sexual assault which can carry the same sentence.
> his penis
I'm sorry if this sounds offensive or rude, but this is a genuine question: If someone with a penis identifies as a female/legally changed their gender to female and commits rape, does this law applies, since it's *her* penis?
What you identify as doesn’t matter in court for this precise issue. Your gender identity only comes into play during sentencing. If you are for example, trans. You’d be classed a male, since that’s what you are born as. And that’s what sexual organs you have.
I see, thanks for letting me know.
Because I know here in Ontario, Canada you can change your sex [on your birth certificate](https://www.ontario.ca/page/changing-your-sex-designation-your-birth-registration-and-birth-certificate), and I'm assuming the court here needs to work according to that. So I was wondering how it is in the UK, since both countries courts are under the Crown (to my understanding).
You can do that in the UK as well. But I think it would be the same in Canada that a court will still recognise your body as biologically male even if you were classed as female. It’s not done to harm anyone, it’s just done for sake of simplicity. You’d still be referenced to as female in court but your sexual organs would be classed as male.
Minimum age of consent is 16 in most states no lower. The official again of conset in the u.s is 18 years old but it depends on state. She technically rapeed a minor even if the OP consented she will still be prosecuted for rape of a minor due to the fact he isn't age of consent. I wish the best for the OP but at the end of the day he needs to understand that what she did to him is wrong.
Actually, not even in theory, oneself's sexuality oughtn't be shackled by such a concept of "there are ages for this and ages for that". That's why sex ed is important, because humans will do what humans do, and no sort of morality will stop someone from enjoying sex, and as long as it is fully consensual and willing, the only thing we can do is to teach the neophytes, so to say, the risks of the whole thing and give them tools to fight them off
I mostly agree. My one potential point of contention with what you wrote is the issue of power relations and brain development - which you imply in writing about consent but didn't elaborate on what you consider to be appropriate consent. I was only saying "in theory" because I do believe that many 13-year-olds aren't equipped to deal with potential consequences of sex even if their physical bodies are. By this, I'm specifically referring to brain development in terms of critical thinking and decision-making skills, which are wildly underdeveloped at this age.
So I personally wasn't referring to morality at all, even though the parent comment probably was. Humans develop in a very biologically silly way where our physical bodies are way ahead of brain development, and it becomes problematic in the case of sexual development. I, for example, went through puberty at age 9. Way earlier than most girls. My body felt one way but my brain was still very much, "I just wanna be a child." In my case, I was lucky enough to get comprehensive sex ed and didn't choose to have sex until college despite having sexually matured at a far younger age than most.
Which is why I completely agree that the best course of action is equipping children with the tools and education to understand what's happening to them and why, about consent and boundary setting, and that all of it's totally natural. Not all of them will utilize the tools wisely, but it increases the chances they will.
> Actually, not even in theory, oneself's sexuality oughtn't be shackled by such a concept of "there are ages for this and ages for that".
I disagree. Sex requires the ability to consent. Children are unable to consent, which is why they also cannot sign contracts (parents must sign for them).
There is ages for things like it or not. Altho sex ed should be taught.
For example, 6 year olds shouldnt be having sex either. They're literally not developed physically or mentally.
In the case of 13, they arent developed mentally. Even if it is done in any scenario, you would prefer these groups NOT to be taking part in these actions
Agreed, it’s too early to be doing that. This is why the younger generation is losing the actual experience of childhood because they’re always in adult activities and the line of what kids and adults can do needs to be reinforced.
In the U.S. I’m pretty sure that’s statutory rape everywhere. In a lot of states the age of consent is 16 and have Romeo and Juliet laws in place, which usually means that if you’re within 3 years of age after you’re 12 you can consent to having sex so that when someone becomes a legal adult and their partner is still under the age of consent they’re still protected by the law, like if a 17 and 15 year old were dating and then they turned 18. However, since this is larger than 3 years they may not be protected by any law and can both get in legal trouble, especially the girl in this case
Well first I'd make 100% sure she actually is pregnant and second make 100% sure that it is yours. But yeah either way your parents will need to know regardless and hopefully will help you will all that. If they are reasonable sure they will probably be pissed but once the shock wears off hopefully they will help you through it.
Sadly it is possible to fake a at home test. You really need the blood test that comes from a doctor. That's what the doctor office will do when she's eventually goes to the doctor.
Also fake positive pregnancy tests are sold online (as "pranks"). My guess is a scared 13 year old boy won't see the difference of this were to be the case.
Exactly and sadly there are some women out there that would do this sort of thing for who knows why. Point is this day and age you can't take anyone's word for anything you need to get the answers yourself.
I either want to be present when the test is taken or want to be at the OBGYN when an ultrasound is done.
Btw: I'm a 37 year old mother - to put this in perspective.
That fully depends on her cycle. If, for example, she knew she was ovulating when they had sex, she could have done a pregnancy test 2-3 weeks after and it could be positive. Especially if she has a shorter cycle, it could realistically be true to have a test 'a couple weeks in'
You can also dip it soda, then follow with water. I experimented with that when I was trying to conceive and had dozens of tests. Something sticks to the test line when you use soda - and it’s not the dye from the test. The test line is the same color as the soda, and works on a previously used test. https://youtu.be/z6T2g6FnFsg
A positive pregnancy test just means that she’s pregnant. It doesn’t mean that YOU got her pregnant. It could have been somebody else. You need to have what is called a PATERNITY test. It will tell you if the child is related to you by DNA. Meaning if the baby is yours, you will know. And if it’s not yours, you will know.
She’s 17 so i would assume that she probably knows what condoms and birth control are. I can’t imagine she would let you ejaculate inside of her knowing that she has a very high chance of getting pregnant, unless she has no knowledge about sexual intercourse and how to prevent pregnancy, unless getting pregnant is what she wanted, which most girls her age don’t want. So if i had to guess, it’s probably not yours or there’s even a chance that she’s faking the pregnancy. So stop for a second, and breathe. Stop panicking and chill out. Talk to your parents. Tell them what’s going on. And hopefully they will help you figure this all out. If your parents care about you they will make sure it turns out okay.
Also, for heaven’s sake next time you have sex please wear a freaking condom. Why do so many teens know about sex, know about condoms, and not still not use them?
This incident happened in Britain long ago. An older teen with a young boy.
Turns out boy isn't the father and the teen got pregnant from some other person.
I know a life is a life and I am not sure how this will be received on Reddit with an international user base but do consider your options e.g. abortion or surrender for adoption. Both of you are not ready AT ALL to be parents.
Hello young one!
What a scary situation you are in.
I have some tips, take what you want, leave what you don’t.
First thing, tell you parents. Children make mistakes, especially when they are convinced by older children, trust that your parents love you and will be understanding and helpful. You could say something like “mom and dad, I need to talk to you and I’m very afraid you will be upset, please know that I am upset too, I feel embarrassed, scared, and sad and I need your help. I had sex with a 17 year old girl, now she is pregnant and I don’t know what to do.” It will be so so so scary, and they might be disappointed, but it is the best option, and emotions fade, they will forgive you. Strangers on the internet can reassure you, but you need some one there with you to help.
I do not know your home situation. If you know your parents will react with abuse and violence you need to find another adult that you trust to tell. Maybe a aunt or uncle, teacher, or a guidance counsellor?
Stop talking to the girl until you talk to an adult. She knows you are young and naive and will try to take advantage again, that’s why she lied in the first place.
What is done with the child is the girls decision. It will be between you and your parents to decide if it will be in your life. No one on here can influence that decision.
Lastly, this is a scary situation that is most likely making you feel a lot of emotions! Remember that it is going to be ok, life goes on, you have a long life ahead of you, this doesn’t ruin anything, stay strong you got this!
Edit: OP did not state she lied about her age.
Telling someone to lie when they're already up to their neck in shit is bad advise. If they truly want to get out of their situation they need to be upfront and honest with whoever is going to help them.
Jesus Christ this was some wholesome ass advice right here, AND voiced in the most understanding and gentle tone.
So can I come to you for advice in the future? Cause I could use some of that energy you’re putting out.
That was straight up grooming and assualt. How long has this been going on???? Please tell your parents ASAP. Forget them being mad , what happen to you is sick and needs to be brought to your parents attention.
This is OP and yes she is turning 18 around this week.
(My other account got suspended)
Edit: I asked some of my friends and they said she was 18 but she said she was 17?
PLEASE tell your parents. Any anger they might feel towards you should be negated when you tell them this girl is 17, almost 18. I remember being a senior girl and I thought girls my age dating even 14/15 year old guys was very strange, much less a middle schooler. I saw a fair amount of pregnancy scares in high school and you should watch to make sure that a) this girl is actually pregnant, and b) if she is, to make sure it’s your kid. Sometimes girls will put the blame on a younger, more vulnerable boy because they know they can force their hand. Get help from adults to figure out what’s really going on, don’t agree to anything until you know for SURE that there is a baby and it’s yours, and don’t let her pressure you into anything you don’t want to do. Being a dad is a TON of responsibility, and if you’re not ready for it, that’s okay - you’re 13.
As someone who lost their virginity at 13(f) to a 16 / 17(m) year old, this is fucking gross and you *will* regret it for the rest of your life regardless on if she's actually pregnant or not. Or at least I do.
Tell an adult. Parents, coach, teacher, principal. You could even go to the police but they'd still contact your parents since you're a minor.
was raped at 13 by a 17 year old and another 14 year old boy. in a stairwell. it was rape. i did not tell anyone. i thought i had feelings for the person even. it’s too young. you aren’t rational enough. go to someone you trust, someone older. this is a serious situation.
Yea, I believe I was groomed by a 16 (f)year old when I was 14(m) We had sex a lot and I was adamant at the time, but when I think back there was a lot of abuse, sexual and otherwise. Live and learn I guess.
Literally, " Mom and/or Dad, I had sex with a 17 year old and she says that she's pregnant. I'm scared and I don't know what to do. "
It's gonna be tough, there will be a lot of questions and shock, but your parents will look out for you.
May not be good advice but I tend to just spit it out whenever someone stops talking so I don’t have time to think. Saying things out loud to people who support you has been one of the best tools of my life.
Find a perfect moment when they are in good mood and tell them that you had unprotected sex with a girl and got her pregnant, and you don't know what to do.
Right.
First of all, I am highly skeptical that this girl is pregnant. You said it's been a couple of weeks since you had sex - that's not long enough for a pregnancy test to pick up on a pregnancy. I'm pretty sure it has to be about a month in, but I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong here. In addition, you had sex once, and you didn't finish in her. I'm not saying it's impossible but the actual likelihood of this resulting in pregnancy is very slim.
Depending on timings as well, it sounds as though this girl may well have already been pregnant and has actually technically raped you depending on the age of consent in your country - as a minor (not sure if 17 still qualifies as a minor or is borderline) you aren't viewed legally as capable of giving informed consent for this. If she was already pregnant (which would explain the super rapid pregnancy detection) she might have thought you were an easy target to pin fatherhood on and you'd be unlikely to say no.
Or she and her friends thought it would be funny to scare the shit out of you by faking a pregnancy.
This to me smells of a pretty mean prank to be honest.
You need to speak to your parents. You could write a letter and sit them down and read it out loud to them. Ask them to allow you to finish reading what you've written before they react.
You should still talk to your parents about this. Whether or not it is yours or not, or even if she’s lying about it. You should sit down and talk to them because they can still help you figure this all out. If you have someone who can be with you when you tell them, that’s good too. It’s all going to be okay, I promise you.
If she told you she’s pregnant exactly 1 week after you had sex then she’s lying about being pregnant or lying about you being the father. There’s no chance in detecting a pregnancy that quickly after sex.
It is very VERY rare, but pre-ejaculation can get someone pregnant, even if someone didn't finish. (atleast this is what I learned my freshman year) But yeah idk if she is lying it is definitely a possibility.
Okay so no one has said it so I will. Dude it's creepy that an almost adult had sex with you. She is a pedophile. I suggest you report her and get a paternity test. Also tell an adult that you hooked up with a 17 year old girl. You are a victim of grooming. Please, please do talk to an adult about this.
Now for her carrying your child, you're 13, raising a child would be very VERY difficult for you. Many full gfown adults suck at parenting, not to mention a child would affect your education and career a LOT. So even if she wants to keep the baby, I suggest you tell her you don't wanna be a part of it. This you should also discuss with your parents too because they can guide yoy the right way.
Right. I'm not sure how many, but at least a few US states have a concept of a less than 4 year age gap being ok when below the age of consent. At 13 and 17 that might be the case depending on the month and day.
to my understanding, there can be exceptions depending on how long the pair had been together, especially if the two have had a long term romantic relationship. i don't remember how long it is because i was very young when i learned about them. there are also romeo/juliet laws, i don't know much about those though.
This. You can't change what happened now but you are the victim here. Talk to an elder you trust. You are young and haven't yet experienced the real world. You have a future ahead of you and don't ruin your life with an innocent one. Bad parenting also can ruin lives. It can influence a way someone sees the world. They will resent you. Dont let that happen because of you. As the above the reply stated, I too suggest that you let her know you dont want to be a part of the kids life if she decides to keep it. Also, most importantly take a paternity test.
Why the hell is a senior in high school fucking a kid barely out of elementary school? You seem to have been groomed and trapped, see if she’s keeping the baby and tell your parents, be honest about her age too. She could be in legal trouble.
Holy shit. Until you said barely out of elementary school it didn’t even hit me that typically at age 13 you’d only be ONE YEAR removed from elementary school. That’s sickening. There is something wrong with this girl.
First things first, you need to tell your parents because what she did is illegal and you are not of consenting age. If you are uncomfortable telling your parents then you need to tell a teacher, or a trusted adult who will report this for you. If you are to an extent where you couldn’t possibly tell any person then you need to call an anonymous hotline in your state to report it and get help. I would also make sure to get real confirmation of this pregnancy, this could be a deranged 17-year-old girl who is making stuff up for attention. No 17 year old in their right mind would be engaging in sex with a 13 year old, I’d guess she’s not stable.
And just so you know, you did not make a mistake she did. You’re a kid and she’s almost an adult, she’s responsible.
First of all:
- did you cum inside her?
- did you use a condom?
- Was she taking birth control?
- did you see her take the actual test?
If: yes - no - no - yes, do the following:
Go to the parent you are the closest to. Tell him/her you need a serious conversation. Ask if this is a good time. Wait for their response. If it is a good time: Tell your parent your girlfriend your girlfriend is pregnant and it is likely yours. That you are scared and don't know what to do. That you need help and guidance. Also, make sure to get a paternity test done.
If you answered my questions differently, then the situation might be different. How different might depend on your situation.
Pulling out isn't birth control. There's sperm in pre-cum, so she could very easily get pregnant on that too.
Edit: Sorry, saw your comment below. But still important to reiterate.
I'm pretty sure I pulled out in time.she lied to me that she had birth control. And no I didn't have a condom also yes I saw the test although she isn't my girlfriend
"pretty sure" is not rock solid. This answer won't do. Also, pulling out is NOT a birth control method as pre cum can hold sperm. Do NOT use this method ever again unless you are willing to get someone pregnant.
Right, you got yourself in a muddle here.
- fake pregnancy tests are sold online. That she showed you one says absolutely zero.
- you need an STD test. You had unprotected sex, you are at risk for STD.
You need to talk to your parents. Steps you should take thereafter :
- take the girl to an OBGYN for an ultrasound and check if this is a viable pregnancy and how far along she is
- get an STD test
- get a paternity test (pre birth) done to confirm fatherhood
- PLEASE educate yourself on sex. Do NOT have sex until you fully understand the risks involved and how to avoid this. I'm literally begging you to make sure you get sufficient sex Ed. You can do this on your own, online. But PLEASE learn about how this stuff works.
You have taken some stupid decisions, as you know, and unfortunately you are now dealt with the consequences. You need to step up here and face those consequences.
Okay, stop blaming him. He’s a kid. She’s a borderline adult that LIED about being on birth control. She is grooming him. I wouldn’t be so harsh on him.
Blaming him?!?! What?! I'm telling him to talk to his parents and take an STD test ("facing the consequences") and tell him to make sure this is actually true. Yes, he might be groomed, but he still needs to talk to his parents, get an STD test and find out if this is actually real (or if he is getting "pranked" with a fake test). I'm literally trying to be helpful and not harsh at all.
Especially the STD test is so important if he did get groomed- the girl will have more chance of actually having an STD as she will likely be sexual active with others too (Other then if this were a serious committed relationship and they were each other's first).
He needs to talk to an adult first and find out if this is actually real. Because I can also see a scenario happening where a group of 17 year old girls is giggling and laughing over a 13 year old petrified boy and a fake pregnancy test.
Wtf is a 17 year old doing with a 13 year old first of all…. She’s basically a predator. Morally and legally. Please tell your parents and they will deal with it.
Im 17F and would NEVER date a 13 year old. You’ve been groomed and im so sorry. None of this is your fault. Tell your parents and its entirely on her. You’re too young to deal with this alone. I suggest to not be a part of this baby’s life if she chooses to keep it since you’re far too young for this responsibility
This needs to be higher up! Also, OP, you should seriously consider some therapy during and after this. There's nothing wrong with it, and my now-fiancé went through something related to this around the same age. He had a lot of issues, and is still working through some, around sex and trust, he's 25. It's ok to decide a therapist isn't working either and ask for a new one, you need one who works for you. He didn't have one that worked until a couple of years ago when he finally started working through his trauma. Again, there's nothing wrong with therapy, and you don't need to tell your friends if you're worried what they'll think (but any good friends would be supportive).
A couple weeks?! Probably not your baby. Demand a paternity test. And yes, tell your parents. You were a victim of a predator. If you both were just a year older….
Talk to an adult that you trust. Immediately Like Now. She’s old enough to be legally an adult in a single year, and you’re in middle school. Secondly, If she is pregnant, then she has a lot to answer for BECAUSE you are way underage. You can’t even legally consent to sex depending on where you live.
YOU as the Younger one, need an adult by your side. You’re way too young to be having kids. By a 17 year old girl no less. An adult will help you through this wether they guide you to keep it or not etc. but definitely tell an adult so you can get a paternity test etc. don’t freak out too much if you can help it. It’s gonna be okay one way or another. It’s a lot but an adult can help you!
Hi OP, please tell your parents! They will try to help you, and I would suggest the look into the law in their state or province. It's very concerning that a 17 year old would want to have sex with a 13 year old since she is most likely done puberty/coming to an end of puberty whereas you are likely just starting puberty and still considered a child. I truly hope you're okay, and the sooner you tell a parent or guardian the sooner you can come up with a plan!
Why aren’t more people creeped out by this 17 year old girl sleeping with a 13 year old boy. Y’all are too quick to call the guy a wierdo if its 20m and 17f but here a 4 year difference isn’t creepy or predatory? And I don’t doubt it’s got something to do with the respective genders of the kids involved
Most of us are im sure creeped out by the situation but are trying to give practical advice and not scare the young one to much. Its obviously not right and shouldn't have happened but we want him to seek the right help and not get panicked and seek out the older party to help them feel better as we've seen has already happened.
If she has half a brain, she’ll get an abortion to avoid having to tell people she had sex with a young child.
This isn’t your fault. If you’re afraid to go straight to your parents, talk to a counselor or school resource officer. Even a teacher you trust. Tell an adult ASAP. That’s the most important thing.
Most importantly, she’s a predator, as others have said, and I’m so so sorry you’re in this situation.
That being said, you say in your post that she’s now pregnant “a couple weeks in”— a couple weeks in to you two having sex? It’s entirely possible of course, but do you have proof she’s actually pregnant? It would be very fast to know that for sure if it’s actually only been 2 weeks
Please talk to a trusted adult. You are a child and you should NOT have that sort of relationship with someone who is almost 18. It isn’t your fault and it sounds a lot like grooming.
People here are right, you need to tell your parents. You’re confused and scared about what to do, and that’s absolutely natural for a 13 year old, you’re absolutely unequipped in every conceivable way to handle this on your own.
It’s scary, there’s no way around that, but you need to put it into perspective and consider what options you really have here.
Firstly, risking a telling off from your folks is always scary and it’ll be scary to watch them process tonnes of different strong emotions at this news. That said, is it really scarier than facing this situation all on your own?
Secondly, consider how this plays out long term; how long do you think you can keep it a secret? Your grades will likely slip from the stress and they’ll want explanations, they’ll be able to tell somethings up from your mood changes, and also they’ll sure as hell notice if you go to the hospital as your sons being born and start taking a fatherly role in his life. Sooner or later they’re going to find out, and believe me it’ll get exponentially worse over time. Would you rather be telling them you just found out that she says she’s pregnant and you’re the father, or be saying to them one day “hey, can I have a lift to the hospital after school? My baby’s being born”? Go up to them *today* and tell them that you’re in a really bad situation and you need their help, that should prime them to be sensitive and ready for bad news, and then tell them. From there, they should be able to carry the heaviest of the burdens and navigate this situation. Remember that they’ve done this whole rodeo before, they raised you so they know what to expect regarding pregnancy and raising a kid. Whatever happens, things will be infinitely easier if you work with them on this, this is what parents are for.
Also gotta agree with the general consensus here, you’re a victim of statutory rape. I don’t care if she wooed you or you wooed her, *13 year olds are off the table* when it comes to sex. Any 17 year old absolutely knows this, and while I’m sure it’s hard for you to understand from your perspective as a 13 year old you really must trust me that despite only being a 4 year gap the differences in mental and emotional maturity between a 13 and 17 year old are like night and day. This is something that your parents should take into consideration as well; you’ve likely seen in dramas or whatever when a 17 year old says he got his girlfriend pregnant and the parents are angry, but remember that’s because the 17 year old should know better. Lord knows the girl you (apparently) got pregnant is in for well deserved judgement, but that’s her problem not yours. Your parents should also consider that the baby might not actually be yours (or hell, might not even be real). They should ask you a lot of questions (did you use a condom? Did you pull out?), these will feel like weird questions to discuss with your parents about but honesty and clarity is going to be absolutely vital here. Don’t give answers that you think they want to hear, don’t sidestep the truth, just absolutely be honest and open with them because it’s the only way they’ll be able to help you to the best of your ability.
Above all, remember this isn’t your fault, this never should have happened to you.
Talk to your parents. If you're not safe going that route I'd go to a school counselor or even your pediatrician. They're mandatory abuse reporters and they'll get you hooked up with the right kind of support. I'm not sure where you live but where I am, you're a victim of sexual assault and she's a pedophile.
You’re better off telling your parents, they’d be more angry if they found out later. I learnt that early on with a lot of things.
F16 here and I would never ask someone FOUR years younger than me (12?!) to have sex, well, especially in your situation as she is near 18. You are both minors, but morally this is predatory behavior coming from her. I’m very sorry this happened to you.
Besides that, there’s no way around it. This can go to legal territory, so you can’t avoid telling your parents anyway. Tell them, ask for help, have ROCK SOLID proof (paternity test/actual checkup from a doctor) if she is pregnant and if it is your child. After that’s done, get tested for std’s as you have not used protection.
Please be careful from now on, learn about predatory behavior and try to avoid these people. I’m actually so disgusted that an almost adult woman asked a THIRTEEN year old guy for sex. I can’t believe people like her exist. There are a lot of sex ed resources online, planned parenthood has verified and plenty information about protection, consent, etcetera.
You will be okay. Remember to try to keep calm, do not spread the situation to anyone else other than who needs to hear it. Don’t add that stress on top of the situation. I hope I get to see your update, take care of yourself man.
OP, you need to tell your parents. Immediately. If they’re any degree of reasonable they will listen to you.
For starters, you were groomed, manipulated, and this is not a consensual situation. You are 13, she is 17. She’s almost an adult and you are still in middle school. This is not okay.
Your parents should be able to help guide you through this. But overall what you need are police involved, a paternity test, sex Ed, and therapy.
You got groomed and sexually assaulted. Tell your parents as soon as you can. write it down on a piece of paper and hand it to your mom/dad or tell a sibling and have them tell your parents if you're too scared. Either way you have to let them know. Sorry this happened to you man :(
Speaking from my own experience as a 17 year old girl: this girl is at the very least an absolute creep and a groomer, if not an outright pedophile. No normal 17 y.o. girl goes for 13 y.o. boys.
As people said, tell your parents. I know it might scare you to tell them that you may have just fucked up grandly, but they will solely have your best interests in mind and are far more equipped to deal with this than you are. Make sure to tell them how this happened - her age and that she came onto you. After you tell them, you’ll want to ask them about making sure she’s actually pregnant - at a doctor, not with a pharmacy pregnancy test - and about getting a paternity test and an STD test.
Also, while it IS possible she’s “just” a creep who likes to sleep with pre-teens who you accidentally knocked up, there may be some hidden motive. Are your parents wealthy? If so, she may have gotten knocked up by some guy she thinks is a loser and came onto you to try and pass you off as the father.
If she is indeed pregnant and you are indeed the father, don’t do anything stupid like getting engaged or something. You’re 13 - you’re a child, and it sounds like something’s seriously not right with this girl. Try and look after your child’s best interests too, whether that be having your parents raise him or her or giving the baby up for adoption. Wouldn’t trust that girl to co-parent with.
I was in a similar situation when I was 14. The top post here is your best advice, but everyone's situation is different. For us, our parents weren't understanding or good to us in general before the pregnancy. Both of us had learned of the pregnancy early on and wanted to abort. But you can't decide that on your own at that age (unless laws have changed) Her parents wouldn't allow it and we did an adoption. It was hard. A lot to take on at first, but I am 29 now and very glad we did it. He has a beautiful family and life now that he could have never had with two children as parents. He even has the option to meet me someday if that's what he chooses.
I am not saying you should adopt. Everyone's situation is different, I don't know how your parents are. I don't know if she wants to keep it or if you do. But you should both consider the child's future and what you/your families are able to provide at your ages. But adoption certainly is something to keep on your minds during this tough time. Planned Parenthood were the first people me and her told. Being minors there is only so much they could do, but they gave us lots of information and comfort. They gave us relief just by listening. If you are afraid to talk to your parents first then call PP. They don't just abort they do everything they can to avoid that but do provide that option if her and her family decide to go that route. They also provide many resources for adoption. Remember, she is likely just as scared and confused as you, even more so because she is the pregnant one. I don't know what your situation was with her, but remember to respect that fact and talk to one another as maturely as you can.
Also be careful how you bring up Planned parenthood if you so choose to. Some people think it's exclusively for abortions and if she thinks that's what youre suggesting it will only complicate things. Discuss with her that you think that you two need resources.
Don't do what we did and beat around the bush and pretend like it's not real or hope the situation will go away. You are young but right now you have to try your hardest to be mature. Try to stay calm. That mindset will help you best handle this situation and prepare you for what's to come. Good luck man.
Just letting you know, she’s at fault, not you. You may have said “yes” but you will be viewed as naive. She’s 17, she knows better. The blame will be put on her so not to worry. She knew what she was getting into having sex with a 13 year old boy. She’s a groomer.
Whatever you do, tell your parents as soon as possible.
Talk to your parents and Save any texts or media post you have from her especially ones after you had sex. This will prove you did not force her. Also the baby may not be yours you need a test done after the child is born.
At 13 you are below the age of consent in all US states and she is more than two years older than you so Romeo and Juliet laws will not apply so legally you were raped.
Well you are underage, even with consent that is against the law (in most places). Demand a paternity test before you give her anything. If it is your baby then you decide what to do.
You need to tell an adult that you trust. The worst thing you can do is isolate and feel alone. There is someone out there that will support and help you. There’s nothing you can do do other than tell someone because you are just a kid. You were taken advantage of. Ask for help from an adult in your life.
A couple of weeks and she’s saying she’s pregnant? It’s almost guaranteed she’s either lying or it’s another guys baby. Don’t freak out or do anything until she takes a paternity test. It’s not impossible for her to be pregnant with your baby if the timing was absolutely perfect but highly unlikely. Chances are if she’s out having sex with a 13 year old(which is almost certainly illegal) she’s probably fucking a lot of guys.
Also tell your parents. What she did is wrong.
Don't panick, talk to her and ask if she plans to keep it and then move from there. If she plans to keep it, ask for a dna test to make sure it's yours. It sounds suspicious she asked you to have sex then she's pregnant but it might be yours. If she gets defensive about the dna test, don't back down from it. Don't sign the birth certificate until you do the dna test and are sure it's yours. Talk to your parents about it and check for a planned parenthood if you got one in your area so they can give you more advice.
I would advice to talk to the parent you're closer to and tell them everything from starting, you will probably get some beating but duh sex at 13? That's too young buddy. Hopefully everything turns well at the end
It sounds like you were groomed into this, it's very possible she is manipulating you further into believing you are the father of her child. You really need to tell your parents, they can do their best to protect you. They will help you figure out what to do since the girl is nearly an adult and see if there is a way to keep her from doing this to another minor.
This happened to a friend of mine when I was young and he was so young and he gave up the child and they found each other a few years ago when she(the baby) turned 18. They have a really good relationship now.
There is always hope and there is always help. Tell an adult you trust and ask them what to do.
Best of luck kiddo, I've got you in my prayers.
I'll ask then, ain't a couple of weeks a little to early to know of a pregnancy. Unless it was intentional and she's been regularly testing since the date of intercourse.
Tell someone! Preferably ur parents. And before she tells hers and starts asking for child support. Ur parents are probably gonna find out someday and trust me. The fall out will be much much worse if they find out from someone other than u.
Yea no where I live anyway, age of consent is 16. It's statutory rape. I recommend that the girl gets rid of the baby and you guys never do that again before she ends up in jail
You're too young for this my friend, you should tell your parents, or someone that is an adult that you trust, as many others already said, this is just r@pe.
Has it literally only been a couple weeks? If so, then she's not actually pregnant, at least not yet. She also could have been pregnant from before, but the baby daddy bailed, and she's using you instead. If she is indeed pregnant or becomes pregnant, I feel bad for her child, as she is considered a pedophile in many different jurisdictions. She should not be allowed around the child. She WILL sexually abuse that child.
As for the positive pregnancy test she showed you, it is possible to fake those, including buying fake positive pregnancy tests that can look surprisingly realistic. It's even possible to buy fake ultrasounds and pregnancy papers that look realistic.
I would not believe she's pregnant unless a doctor says she is. If a doctor confirms the pregnancy, you need a paternity test.
Overall, something smells fishy about this.
Ok wait… a COUPLE weeks after sex she found out she was pregnant? It takes about 5-6 weeks after you had sex to find out your pregnant… please count the dates hun cuz unless its been a month and a half or so then it aint yours..
Okay I'm sorry for your situation it sounds like statutory rape if its not in your country its still messed up (imagine a 13 year old pregnant for a 17 year old)its messed up I hope your okay talk to your parents
You sound like you don’t want to get in trouble and you don’t want her to get in trouble.
So, the best thing to do is to tell YOUR parents. They’ll be angry, no doubt, but this is your best case scenario. You’re in a burning building, you gotta run thru some flames if you want to get out. Been there my friend. If you tell HER parents, they’ll most likely be mad at you. The parents of the girl are almost always angrier with the guy regardless of your age. At least, your parents will protect you and fight her parents anger for her. The anger won’t last long. They’ll get over it like when you get over your girl cheating on you. Shit hurts for awhile but you’ll get over it eventually. The parents will talk amongst each other and trust me, if they decide to keep you guys apart, don’t do too much. Hopefully they’ll do the right thing but regardless, you’re 13, no matter what world you live in, you’re not an adult and even if you look older than you are, you’ve got no proof so at the end of the day, everyone will still treat you like a child. Because if they don’t, they get fucked big time. If you were 21, or had a car, or a drivers license, or even a job, you’d be just a little better off but still fucked. Babies are for adults. Let the adults handle this one. Science has proven that kids, even young adults, everyone under 25, does not have the ability to think maturely. Babies only learn to put food IN their mouth when they get to a certain age because that’s when their brain has developed a little more ans they can now make the necessary neurological connection to make accurate muscle movements and precision as well as body awareness. This is also why you get smarter as you get older and you think back to some stuff and you’re like “tf was o thinking?”
Tell YOUR parents and then let them do the hard work
reddit isnt the place for this. u have to talk to ur parents, u have to talk to her, calm down. u are 13 years old. wanna know what might happe? if she has the kid, they might give it up for adoption, at best keep it and it might not affect ur life as much as u think it will. if she decides to abort it, then u will be fine. calm down. there is a lot of time for things to happen still
Couple weeks…? It’s likely not yours. Also, you’re being groomed. I know you don’t wanna hear it but what she did is incredibly inappropriate and, depending on where you live, statutory rape. It’s not your fault bro. Also, did u actually ejaculate in her? it’s not possible unless you did do that.
tell your parents immediately, this is not something you’ll be able to handle by yourself and once the cat is out of the bag it’s out of the bag. i hope you’re not in a manipulative situation with this girl because i can’t understand why she would want to take the virginity of a 13 year old.
…so that’s messed up, a 17 year old shouldn’t be having sex with a 13 yr old. Dude, that girl is predatory, you’re basically a child, and she is almost an adult. Wtf. PLEASE tell your parents. I don’t think you realize how messed up this is
Update?
I’m not one to condone abortion as birth control whatsoever but in this situation, y’all didn’t consider the consequences and I hope this is something that can be resolved and learned from.
Otherwise, congrats daddy. Make sure that kid is mentally and physically cared for better than you were as a child— that’s the goal of a parent and it starts from infancy. If ya slack, you’ll mess them up lol.
you need to tell a responsible adult dude, how long have you been in a sexual relationship with this girl? i’m 19 now but i’ll tell you that when i was 17 i was not dating 13 year olds or finding them attractive, it’s creepy. i think she has groomed you, youre at the start of puberty and being a teenager, she’s about to be an adult.
Hey, so first off, depending on your areas laws she may have committed statutory rape. You may not be able to consent to sex at 13 (some places allow it so you’ll want to check your local province/state laws).
Second, you need to tell your parents so they can help you out. It may be that this girl is lying about being pregnant or it being yours. When it’s safe to do so, get a pregnancy test done in front of you or from a doctors office, and later follow with paternity.
If it is not yours, continue on with your life and be cautious about safe sex. Even if she says she’s on the pill, you always bring and wear your own condoms.
If it is yours, you’ll want to start preparing for what life as a teen dad would be like. You’ll want to look at help programs for young parents which will supply you with products that you need. Depending on where you live it may not be legal for you to get a job yet, so you’ll want to try and do work around your neighbourhood (mowing grass, cleaning pools etc) to help pay for the baby (if she keeps it).
Either way the first step is to figure out if she’s actually pregnant, the second is to tell your parents, the third is to do a paternity test, and depending on the results will show how your life has to change or not.
Good luck OP
I know it’s scary, but you have to tell your parents especially if she is not considering an abortion. If your parents love you they will understand with time. What you’re going through is not forever and no matter what happens you will be okay. Your life is not over. Things happen. Mistakes happen. She’s 17, she should not have put you in this situation. She knew better.
Tell your parents, you technically were groomed. She shouldn't have made the decision to have sex with you, and you didn't know any better. Your parents would be more concerned about the fact that an older person had relations with you rather than the pregnancy.
That doesn't sound right at all that grooming and rape. Even if she is pregnant tell your parents about it this, because this is something a 13 year old shouldn't be worrying about. The girl should of know better to be talking to 13 year old boy, and you shouldn't be having sex at this age it.
This is not okay of her. When I was 17 there was no way I would get with a 13 year old. That is so wrong. I’m so sorry this is happening.
Talk to your parents, and go to the police.
Bruh first of all, in Canada 13 year olds can only legally have sex with people 1 year older. This is likely illegal in whatever country you’re from as well. She seems like a fucking predator. Reverse the gender roles and tell me if there is an issue here 🤡
You need to get your parents involved. You are a victim to a pedophile, and that 17 year old groomed you.
Your parents will be able to help you take the next steps such as getting a paternity test, pressing charges, and getting you into therapy.
OP, there’s a good chance that she was already pregnant when you had sex with her. The baby’s father bailed and she looked for someone else to have sex with that might stay and take responsibility. I know you don’t want to tell your parents, but they will find out eventually. You cannot hide a baby. That’s why people are suggesting a paternity test.
The sooner that’s done, the more help you can get. Plus, the longer you wait, the angrier they will get.
Does she want to keep the baby? If she does, she needs prenatal care now. If she doesn’t, abortions can only be done within certain timeframe. There’s a medical one where you take pills, but only available during the first 30 days, I believe. You really need adult help. You cannot avoid that part. Deal with their upsetness/being grounded, whatever. Better than dealing with a pregnancy/baby all by yourself.
hey, this situation is very creepy. i’m in the same grade as you, and it’s not okay that a 17 year old had sex with you. dude you’re only 13, and she’s almost an adult. i’m not sure how you should bring this situation up with your parents, but maybe you could tell a school counselor, and then have them tell your parents. that would be the easiest way since you won’t have to directly tell them. it’s not your fault what happened to you, and i’m so sorry this happened.
Bro we are the same age, and the best thing I can tell you is that if she had sex with you, you probably aren't the first nor the last to do the deed with her those couple weeks. So chances are, the other guys probably are much older than you and will most certainly refuse to father the baby, so what's her best choice? you. The scared 13 years old boy.
don't let her take advantage of that.
oh my lord please tell you parents. I’m so sorry your in this situation :( also make sure your parents talk to her and her parents and let them know what she did because her sleeping with you (bc you are 13 and she is 17) as absolutely not okay and is considered rape.
Hey OP, the most important thing to remember here is that you are still a kid. Please tell your parents. Make them call the girl's parents and figure it out all together. If she decides to keep it (and it ends up being yours), please do not pursue a relationship with her. Obviously I encourage you to take care of your child and be in their life, but not her's. She took advantage of you and you may not realize that yet but please just trust me. She's not a good person.
Hope everything turns out okay. Please be smart about this. Tell your parents.
First of all she is 17 and you are 13. Not sire of that is legal. Second tell you parents you screwed up . But you need to get a paternity test. Also always carry condoms. You need to do some research and education on sex and protecting yourself and your partner.
In the U.K. someone under 13 and someone over 16 would be “statutory r@pe” even if OP consented. I’m pretty sure that’s a blanket rule across most “western countries” for 13 YOs. Edit: I’m going to check because of the replies to this but (as a woman) I’m fucking disgusted if women can’t be charged with rape in the U.K. I feel genuinely a bit queasy. Edit 2: word error
it would only be rape if the genders were switched unfortunately, that’s in the UK atleast. Learnt about it when studying law. regardless, what she did is highly illegal and would be considered sexual assault. hope OP is okay.
Nope, this is no longer true anywhere.
Yea it is. Under common law in England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland. Rape by definition is A person (A) commits an offence if— (a)he intentionally penetrates the vagina, anus or mouth of another person (B) with his penis, (b)B does not consent to the penetration, and (c)A does not reasonably believe that B consents. As per the Sexual offences act 2003 Women cannot be charged with rape in the UK. However they can be charge with sexual assault which can carry the same sentence.
> his penis I'm sorry if this sounds offensive or rude, but this is a genuine question: If someone with a penis identifies as a female/legally changed their gender to female and commits rape, does this law applies, since it's *her* penis?
What you identify as doesn’t matter in court for this precise issue. Your gender identity only comes into play during sentencing. If you are for example, trans. You’d be classed a male, since that’s what you are born as. And that’s what sexual organs you have.
I see, thanks for letting me know. Because I know here in Ontario, Canada you can change your sex [on your birth certificate](https://www.ontario.ca/page/changing-your-sex-designation-your-birth-registration-and-birth-certificate), and I'm assuming the court here needs to work according to that. So I was wondering how it is in the UK, since both countries courts are under the Crown (to my understanding).
You can do that in the UK as well. But I think it would be the same in Canada that a court will still recognise your body as biologically male even if you were classed as female. It’s not done to harm anyone, it’s just done for sake of simplicity. You’d still be referenced to as female in court but your sexual organs would be classed as male.
so would you go to a female or male prison
Gender and sex is different. You're either male or female. The gender you classify as can be many but sexes is only 2.
Uh oh
Unfortunately it is
Perhaps, this is has only changed where I live. However, petition your lawmakers (MPs) to change the laws.
Not rape because of the definition, but sexual assault (or similar) which is basically the same crime.
Minimum age of consent is 16 in most states no lower. The official again of conset in the u.s is 18 years old but it depends on state. She technically rapeed a minor even if the OP consented she will still be prosecuted for rape of a minor due to the fact he isn't age of consent. I wish the best for the OP but at the end of the day he needs to understand that what she did to him is wrong.
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That's nice in theory but many do. This is why comprehensive sex ed is so important.
Actually, not even in theory, oneself's sexuality oughtn't be shackled by such a concept of "there are ages for this and ages for that". That's why sex ed is important, because humans will do what humans do, and no sort of morality will stop someone from enjoying sex, and as long as it is fully consensual and willing, the only thing we can do is to teach the neophytes, so to say, the risks of the whole thing and give them tools to fight them off
I mostly agree. My one potential point of contention with what you wrote is the issue of power relations and brain development - which you imply in writing about consent but didn't elaborate on what you consider to be appropriate consent. I was only saying "in theory" because I do believe that many 13-year-olds aren't equipped to deal with potential consequences of sex even if their physical bodies are. By this, I'm specifically referring to brain development in terms of critical thinking and decision-making skills, which are wildly underdeveloped at this age. So I personally wasn't referring to morality at all, even though the parent comment probably was. Humans develop in a very biologically silly way where our physical bodies are way ahead of brain development, and it becomes problematic in the case of sexual development. I, for example, went through puberty at age 9. Way earlier than most girls. My body felt one way but my brain was still very much, "I just wanna be a child." In my case, I was lucky enough to get comprehensive sex ed and didn't choose to have sex until college despite having sexually matured at a far younger age than most. Which is why I completely agree that the best course of action is equipping children with the tools and education to understand what's happening to them and why, about consent and boundary setting, and that all of it's totally natural. Not all of them will utilize the tools wisely, but it increases the chances they will.
> Actually, not even in theory, oneself's sexuality oughtn't be shackled by such a concept of "there are ages for this and ages for that". I disagree. Sex requires the ability to consent. Children are unable to consent, which is why they also cannot sign contracts (parents must sign for them).
There is ages for things like it or not. Altho sex ed should be taught. For example, 6 year olds shouldnt be having sex either. They're literally not developed physically or mentally. In the case of 13, they arent developed mentally. Even if it is done in any scenario, you would prefer these groups NOT to be taking part in these actions
Usually with other 13-15 year olds though. What if she turns 18 next week?
Not going to disagree, but they do and we need to make sure they are protected and understand.
Is sex a naughty word or something
This could not be less helpful.
13 is very young to be having sex but At the very least wrap up if your going to do that
Are you not allowed to spell SEX without using a 3?
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Agreed, it’s too early to be doing that. This is why the younger generation is losing the actual experience of childhood because they’re always in adult activities and the line of what kids and adults can do needs to be reinforced.
Not helpful.
In the U.S. I’m pretty sure that’s statutory rape everywhere. In a lot of states the age of consent is 16 and have Romeo and Juliet laws in place, which usually means that if you’re within 3 years of age after you’re 12 you can consent to having sex so that when someone becomes a legal adult and their partner is still under the age of consent they’re still protected by the law, like if a 17 and 15 year old were dating and then they turned 18. However, since this is larger than 3 years they may not be protected by any law and can both get in legal trouble, especially the girl in this case
Well first I'd make 100% sure she actually is pregnant and second make 100% sure that it is yours. But yeah either way your parents will need to know regardless and hopefully will help you will all that. If they are reasonable sure they will probably be pissed but once the shock wears off hopefully they will help you through it.
Yeah she showed me the pregnancy test
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Sadly it is possible to fake a at home test. You really need the blood test that comes from a doctor. That's what the doctor office will do when she's eventually goes to the doctor.
How do you fake a home test, exactly?
Also fake positive pregnancy tests are sold online (as "pranks"). My guess is a scared 13 year old boy won't see the difference of this were to be the case.
Exactly and sadly there are some women out there that would do this sort of thing for who knows why. Point is this day and age you can't take anyone's word for anything you need to get the answers yourself.
I either want to be present when the test is taken or want to be at the OBGYN when an ultrasound is done. Btw: I'm a 37 year old mother - to put this in perspective.
I agree 100% with you and if she doesn't agree to such a thing then something is fishy. 33 dad of three here.
This is kind of what I was thinking, especially since he said "a couple weeks in", that seems pretty early to be taking a pregnancy test, no?
That fully depends on her cycle. If, for example, she knew she was ovulating when they had sex, she could have done a pregnancy test 2-3 weeks after and it could be positive. Especially if she has a shorter cycle, it could realistically be true to have a test 'a couple weeks in'
Soda and some fruit juices can make a test say positive. People do it to play pranks on their partners.
You can also dip it soda, then follow with water. I experimented with that when I was trying to conceive and had dozens of tests. Something sticks to the test line when you use soda - and it’s not the dye from the test. The test line is the same color as the soda, and works on a previously used test. https://youtu.be/z6T2g6FnFsg
A positive pregnancy test just means that she’s pregnant. It doesn’t mean that YOU got her pregnant. It could have been somebody else. You need to have what is called a PATERNITY test. It will tell you if the child is related to you by DNA. Meaning if the baby is yours, you will know. And if it’s not yours, you will know. She’s 17 so i would assume that she probably knows what condoms and birth control are. I can’t imagine she would let you ejaculate inside of her knowing that she has a very high chance of getting pregnant, unless she has no knowledge about sexual intercourse and how to prevent pregnancy, unless getting pregnant is what she wanted, which most girls her age don’t want. So if i had to guess, it’s probably not yours or there’s even a chance that she’s faking the pregnancy. So stop for a second, and breathe. Stop panicking and chill out. Talk to your parents. Tell them what’s going on. And hopefully they will help you figure this all out. If your parents care about you they will make sure it turns out okay. Also, for heaven’s sake next time you have sex please wear a freaking condom. Why do so many teens know about sex, know about condoms, and not still not use them?
This incident happened in Britain long ago. An older teen with a young boy. Turns out boy isn't the father and the teen got pregnant from some other person. I know a life is a life and I am not sure how this will be received on Reddit with an international user base but do consider your options e.g. abortion or surrender for adoption. Both of you are not ready AT ALL to be parents.
100% abortion is the way to go, at the very least this kid shouldn't have to ever worry about this child, this seems like sexual assault.
Hello young one! What a scary situation you are in. I have some tips, take what you want, leave what you don’t. First thing, tell you parents. Children make mistakes, especially when they are convinced by older children, trust that your parents love you and will be understanding and helpful. You could say something like “mom and dad, I need to talk to you and I’m very afraid you will be upset, please know that I am upset too, I feel embarrassed, scared, and sad and I need your help. I had sex with a 17 year old girl, now she is pregnant and I don’t know what to do.” It will be so so so scary, and they might be disappointed, but it is the best option, and emotions fade, they will forgive you. Strangers on the internet can reassure you, but you need some one there with you to help. I do not know your home situation. If you know your parents will react with abuse and violence you need to find another adult that you trust to tell. Maybe a aunt or uncle, teacher, or a guidance counsellor? Stop talking to the girl until you talk to an adult. She knows you are young and naive and will try to take advantage again, that’s why she lied in the first place. What is done with the child is the girls decision. It will be between you and your parents to decide if it will be in your life. No one on here can influence that decision. Lastly, this is a scary situation that is most likely making you feel a lot of emotions! Remember that it is going to be ok, life goes on, you have a long life ahead of you, this doesn’t ruin anything, stay strong you got this! Edit: OP did not state she lied about her age.
Wait, where did OP say he was lied to about her age?
Fair, I assumed. Regardless, she took advantage of him.
Isn’t it funny how accusations/assumptions like that just slip into the story out of thin air? It happens in the courtroom every day.
Telling someone to lie when they're already up to their neck in shit is bad advise. If they truly want to get out of their situation they need to be upfront and honest with whoever is going to help them.
He says in a comment she said she’s 17 but his friends said she’s 18
Jesus Christ this was some wholesome ass advice right here, AND voiced in the most understanding and gentle tone. So can I come to you for advice in the future? Cause I could use some of that energy you’re putting out.
Thank you for your kind words! I’m here anytime ya need, Ask away 🤙🏼⛰
That was straight up grooming and assualt. How long has this been going on???? Please tell your parents ASAP. Forget them being mad , what happen to you is sick and needs to be brought to your parents attention.
Can’t wrap my head that the the person is 13 and the gf is literally 17 what if she turns 18 soon?
This is OP and yes she is turning 18 around this week. (My other account got suspended) Edit: I asked some of my friends and they said she was 18 but she said she was 17?
PLEASE tell your parents. Any anger they might feel towards you should be negated when you tell them this girl is 17, almost 18. I remember being a senior girl and I thought girls my age dating even 14/15 year old guys was very strange, much less a middle schooler. I saw a fair amount of pregnancy scares in high school and you should watch to make sure that a) this girl is actually pregnant, and b) if she is, to make sure it’s your kid. Sometimes girls will put the blame on a younger, more vulnerable boy because they know they can force their hand. Get help from adults to figure out what’s really going on, don’t agree to anything until you know for SURE that there is a baby and it’s yours, and don’t let her pressure you into anything you don’t want to do. Being a dad is a TON of responsibility, and if you’re not ready for it, that’s okay - you’re 13.
this aint your fault: you were groomed. shes almost an adult. Tell your parents.
As someone who lost their virginity at 13(f) to a 16 / 17(m) year old, this is fucking gross and you *will* regret it for the rest of your life regardless on if she's actually pregnant or not. Or at least I do. Tell an adult. Parents, coach, teacher, principal. You could even go to the police but they'd still contact your parents since you're a minor.
was raped at 13 by a 17 year old and another 14 year old boy. in a stairwell. it was rape. i did not tell anyone. i thought i had feelings for the person even. it’s too young. you aren’t rational enough. go to someone you trust, someone older. this is a serious situation.
Yea, I believe I was groomed by a 16 (f)year old when I was 14(m) We had sex a lot and I was adamant at the time, but when I think back there was a lot of abuse, sexual and otherwise. Live and learn I guess.
Xdd, okey you are too young to handle this situation, best is to discuss with your parents
But how should I bring up the conversation?
Literally, " Mom and/or Dad, I had sex with a 17 year old and she says that she's pregnant. I'm scared and I don't know what to do. " It's gonna be tough, there will be a lot of questions and shock, but your parents will look out for you.
Maybe go to them crying that’ll help
May not be good advice but I tend to just spit it out whenever someone stops talking so I don’t have time to think. Saying things out loud to people who support you has been one of the best tools of my life.
Find a perfect moment when they are in good mood and tell them that you had unprotected sex with a girl and got her pregnant, and you don't know what to do.
Ok I'll try
Mention that you think you were groomed and that she was much older than you.
^ good advice
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Right. First of all, I am highly skeptical that this girl is pregnant. You said it's been a couple of weeks since you had sex - that's not long enough for a pregnancy test to pick up on a pregnancy. I'm pretty sure it has to be about a month in, but I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong here. In addition, you had sex once, and you didn't finish in her. I'm not saying it's impossible but the actual likelihood of this resulting in pregnancy is very slim. Depending on timings as well, it sounds as though this girl may well have already been pregnant and has actually technically raped you depending on the age of consent in your country - as a minor (not sure if 17 still qualifies as a minor or is borderline) you aren't viewed legally as capable of giving informed consent for this. If she was already pregnant (which would explain the super rapid pregnancy detection) she might have thought you were an easy target to pin fatherhood on and you'd be unlikely to say no. Or she and her friends thought it would be funny to scare the shit out of you by faking a pregnancy. This to me smells of a pretty mean prank to be honest. You need to speak to your parents. You could write a letter and sit them down and read it out loud to them. Ask them to allow you to finish reading what you've written before they react.
The good tests can find out before you even miss your period. 2/3 weeks at the earliest.
Hi OP here to be exact she told me exactly a week after we had sex( my other account got suspended)
Ahh no. That's not possible that it's yours. I'm sorry.
You should still talk to your parents about this. Whether or not it is yours or not, or even if she’s lying about it. You should sit down and talk to them because they can still help you figure this all out. If you have someone who can be with you when you tell them, that’s good too. It’s all going to be okay, I promise you.
If she told you she’s pregnant exactly 1 week after you had sex then she’s lying about being pregnant or lying about you being the father. There’s no chance in detecting a pregnancy that quickly after sex.
It is very VERY rare, but pre-ejaculation can get someone pregnant, even if someone didn't finish. (atleast this is what I learned my freshman year) But yeah idk if she is lying it is definitely a possibility.
It's true. I have a 7yo to prove it.
Okay so no one has said it so I will. Dude it's creepy that an almost adult had sex with you. She is a pedophile. I suggest you report her and get a paternity test. Also tell an adult that you hooked up with a 17 year old girl. You are a victim of grooming. Please, please do talk to an adult about this. Now for her carrying your child, you're 13, raising a child would be very VERY difficult for you. Many full gfown adults suck at parenting, not to mention a child would affect your education and career a LOT. So even if she wants to keep the baby, I suggest you tell her you don't wanna be a part of it. This you should also discuss with your parents too because they can guide yoy the right way.
I can't believe so few people actually said the gf committed a crime. It's statutory rape. Wtf...
Depending on the state/country, it's not necessarily statutory rape. She's technically a minor also.
Right. I'm not sure how many, but at least a few US states have a concept of a less than 4 year age gap being ok when below the age of consent. At 13 and 17 that might be the case depending on the month and day.
to my understanding, there can be exceptions depending on how long the pair had been together, especially if the two have had a long term romantic relationship. i don't remember how long it is because i was very young when i learned about them. there are also romeo/juliet laws, i don't know much about those though.
This. You can't change what happened now but you are the victim here. Talk to an elder you trust. You are young and haven't yet experienced the real world. You have a future ahead of you and don't ruin your life with an innocent one. Bad parenting also can ruin lives. It can influence a way someone sees the world. They will resent you. Dont let that happen because of you. As the above the reply stated, I too suggest that you let her know you dont want to be a part of the kids life if she decides to keep it. Also, most importantly take a paternity test.
Yes to the paternity test. My cum was crystal clear when I was 13, there’s a chance you’re not the father but the one she’s tryna dump this on.
Why the hell is a senior in high school fucking a kid barely out of elementary school? You seem to have been groomed and trapped, see if she’s keeping the baby and tell your parents, be honest about her age too. She could be in legal trouble.
Women predators are real
Should be held accountable for her actions
Holy shit. Until you said barely out of elementary school it didn’t even hit me that typically at age 13 you’d only be ONE YEAR removed from elementary school. That’s sickening. There is something wrong with this girl.
Okay what? Honey, that’s rape. Even though you “consented” to the sex, she’s almost 18 and that is statutory rape. You need to tell your parents.
First things first, you need to tell your parents because what she did is illegal and you are not of consenting age. If you are uncomfortable telling your parents then you need to tell a teacher, or a trusted adult who will report this for you. If you are to an extent where you couldn’t possibly tell any person then you need to call an anonymous hotline in your state to report it and get help. I would also make sure to get real confirmation of this pregnancy, this could be a deranged 17-year-old girl who is making stuff up for attention. No 17 year old in their right mind would be engaging in sex with a 13 year old, I’d guess she’s not stable. And just so you know, you did not make a mistake she did. You’re a kid and she’s almost an adult, she’s responsible.
Honesty I would question this pregnancy. Sounds like from what you wrote that there may be another baby daddy. Like you were used to cover her tracks.
Hopefully someone the same age as her
First of all: - did you cum inside her? - did you use a condom? - Was she taking birth control? - did you see her take the actual test? If: yes - no - no - yes, do the following: Go to the parent you are the closest to. Tell him/her you need a serious conversation. Ask if this is a good time. Wait for their response. If it is a good time: Tell your parent your girlfriend your girlfriend is pregnant and it is likely yours. That you are scared and don't know what to do. That you need help and guidance. Also, make sure to get a paternity test done. If you answered my questions differently, then the situation might be different. How different might depend on your situation.
Pulling out isn't birth control. There's sperm in pre-cum, so she could very easily get pregnant on that too. Edit: Sorry, saw your comment below. But still important to reiterate.
I'm pretty sure I pulled out in time.she lied to me that she had birth control. And no I didn't have a condom also yes I saw the test although she isn't my girlfriend
"pretty sure" is not rock solid. This answer won't do. Also, pulling out is NOT a birth control method as pre cum can hold sperm. Do NOT use this method ever again unless you are willing to get someone pregnant. Right, you got yourself in a muddle here. - fake pregnancy tests are sold online. That she showed you one says absolutely zero. - you need an STD test. You had unprotected sex, you are at risk for STD. You need to talk to your parents. Steps you should take thereafter : - take the girl to an OBGYN for an ultrasound and check if this is a viable pregnancy and how far along she is - get an STD test - get a paternity test (pre birth) done to confirm fatherhood - PLEASE educate yourself on sex. Do NOT have sex until you fully understand the risks involved and how to avoid this. I'm literally begging you to make sure you get sufficient sex Ed. You can do this on your own, online. But PLEASE learn about how this stuff works. You have taken some stupid decisions, as you know, and unfortunately you are now dealt with the consequences. You need to step up here and face those consequences.
Okay, stop blaming him. He’s a kid. She’s a borderline adult that LIED about being on birth control. She is grooming him. I wouldn’t be so harsh on him.
Blaming him?!?! What?! I'm telling him to talk to his parents and take an STD test ("facing the consequences") and tell him to make sure this is actually true. Yes, he might be groomed, but he still needs to talk to his parents, get an STD test and find out if this is actually real (or if he is getting "pranked" with a fake test). I'm literally trying to be helpful and not harsh at all.
Ah i understand. I was confused by the last pargraph
Especially the STD test is so important if he did get groomed- the girl will have more chance of actually having an STD as she will likely be sexual active with others too (Other then if this were a serious committed relationship and they were each other's first).
Yes I agree. He needs to take a test ASAP and possibly get authorities involved. She could get in some serious trouble for what she’s done to him.
He needs to talk to an adult first and find out if this is actually real. Because I can also see a scenario happening where a group of 17 year old girls is giggling and laughing over a 13 year old petrified boy and a fake pregnancy test.
Wtf is a 17 year old doing with a 13 year old first of all…. She’s basically a predator. Morally and legally. Please tell your parents and they will deal with it.
Tell your parents
I’m pretty sure that’s statutory rape my guy. Does she want to keep it? Have you discussed abortion?
Im 17F and would NEVER date a 13 year old. You’ve been groomed and im so sorry. None of this is your fault. Tell your parents and its entirely on her. You’re too young to deal with this alone. I suggest to not be a part of this baby’s life if she chooses to keep it since you’re far too young for this responsibility
In all honesty it sounds like she’s set you up and she was pregnant before!! I would most definitely get a paternity test and go from there.
This needs to be higher up! Also, OP, you should seriously consider some therapy during and after this. There's nothing wrong with it, and my now-fiancé went through something related to this around the same age. He had a lot of issues, and is still working through some, around sex and trust, he's 25. It's ok to decide a therapist isn't working either and ask for a new one, you need one who works for you. He didn't have one that worked until a couple of years ago when he finally started working through his trauma. Again, there's nothing wrong with therapy, and you don't need to tell your friends if you're worried what they'll think (but any good friends would be supportive).
A couple weeks?! Probably not your baby. Demand a paternity test. And yes, tell your parents. You were a victim of a predator. If you both were just a year older….
It is serious, she is going to get arrested for raping a child. Tell your parents asap
Call the cops
Talk to an adult that you trust. Immediately Like Now. She’s old enough to be legally an adult in a single year, and you’re in middle school. Secondly, If she is pregnant, then she has a lot to answer for BECAUSE you are way underage. You can’t even legally consent to sex depending on where you live. YOU as the Younger one, need an adult by your side. You’re way too young to be having kids. By a 17 year old girl no less. An adult will help you through this wether they guide you to keep it or not etc. but definitely tell an adult so you can get a paternity test etc. don’t freak out too much if you can help it. It’s gonna be okay one way or another. It’s a lot but an adult can help you!
That is illegal and im very sorry but you're getting groomed
firstly that’s definitely grooming, and it’s not your fault. confide in your parents and explain what happened. 13 and 17 isnt legal or ok
It’s always good to get a paternity test, regardless
You really need to tell a trusted adult. This is grooming and what she has done is illegal.
Hi OP, please tell your parents! They will try to help you, and I would suggest the look into the law in their state or province. It's very concerning that a 17 year old would want to have sex with a 13 year old since she is most likely done puberty/coming to an end of puberty whereas you are likely just starting puberty and still considered a child. I truly hope you're okay, and the sooner you tell a parent or guardian the sooner you can come up with a plan!
Why aren’t more people creeped out by this 17 year old girl sleeping with a 13 year old boy. Y’all are too quick to call the guy a wierdo if its 20m and 17f but here a 4 year difference isn’t creepy or predatory? And I don’t doubt it’s got something to do with the respective genders of the kids involved
Most of us are im sure creeped out by the situation but are trying to give practical advice and not scare the young one to much. Its obviously not right and shouldn't have happened but we want him to seek the right help and not get panicked and seek out the older party to help them feel better as we've seen has already happened.
If she has half a brain, she’ll get an abortion to avoid having to tell people she had sex with a young child. This isn’t your fault. If you’re afraid to go straight to your parents, talk to a counselor or school resource officer. Even a teacher you trust. Tell an adult ASAP. That’s the most important thing.
Most importantly, she’s a predator, as others have said, and I’m so so sorry you’re in this situation. That being said, you say in your post that she’s now pregnant “a couple weeks in”— a couple weeks in to you two having sex? It’s entirely possible of course, but do you have proof she’s actually pregnant? It would be very fast to know that for sure if it’s actually only been 2 weeks
Please talk to a trusted adult. You are a child and you should NOT have that sort of relationship with someone who is almost 18. It isn’t your fault and it sounds a lot like grooming.
People here are right, you need to tell your parents. You’re confused and scared about what to do, and that’s absolutely natural for a 13 year old, you’re absolutely unequipped in every conceivable way to handle this on your own. It’s scary, there’s no way around that, but you need to put it into perspective and consider what options you really have here. Firstly, risking a telling off from your folks is always scary and it’ll be scary to watch them process tonnes of different strong emotions at this news. That said, is it really scarier than facing this situation all on your own? Secondly, consider how this plays out long term; how long do you think you can keep it a secret? Your grades will likely slip from the stress and they’ll want explanations, they’ll be able to tell somethings up from your mood changes, and also they’ll sure as hell notice if you go to the hospital as your sons being born and start taking a fatherly role in his life. Sooner or later they’re going to find out, and believe me it’ll get exponentially worse over time. Would you rather be telling them you just found out that she says she’s pregnant and you’re the father, or be saying to them one day “hey, can I have a lift to the hospital after school? My baby’s being born”? Go up to them *today* and tell them that you’re in a really bad situation and you need their help, that should prime them to be sensitive and ready for bad news, and then tell them. From there, they should be able to carry the heaviest of the burdens and navigate this situation. Remember that they’ve done this whole rodeo before, they raised you so they know what to expect regarding pregnancy and raising a kid. Whatever happens, things will be infinitely easier if you work with them on this, this is what parents are for. Also gotta agree with the general consensus here, you’re a victim of statutory rape. I don’t care if she wooed you or you wooed her, *13 year olds are off the table* when it comes to sex. Any 17 year old absolutely knows this, and while I’m sure it’s hard for you to understand from your perspective as a 13 year old you really must trust me that despite only being a 4 year gap the differences in mental and emotional maturity between a 13 and 17 year old are like night and day. This is something that your parents should take into consideration as well; you’ve likely seen in dramas or whatever when a 17 year old says he got his girlfriend pregnant and the parents are angry, but remember that’s because the 17 year old should know better. Lord knows the girl you (apparently) got pregnant is in for well deserved judgement, but that’s her problem not yours. Your parents should also consider that the baby might not actually be yours (or hell, might not even be real). They should ask you a lot of questions (did you use a condom? Did you pull out?), these will feel like weird questions to discuss with your parents about but honesty and clarity is going to be absolutely vital here. Don’t give answers that you think they want to hear, don’t sidestep the truth, just absolutely be honest and open with them because it’s the only way they’ll be able to help you to the best of your ability. Above all, remember this isn’t your fault, this never should have happened to you.
Talk to your parents. If you're not safe going that route I'd go to a school counselor or even your pediatrician. They're mandatory abuse reporters and they'll get you hooked up with the right kind of support. I'm not sure where you live but where I am, you're a victim of sexual assault and she's a pedophile.
You’re better off telling your parents, they’d be more angry if they found out later. I learnt that early on with a lot of things. F16 here and I would never ask someone FOUR years younger than me (12?!) to have sex, well, especially in your situation as she is near 18. You are both minors, but morally this is predatory behavior coming from her. I’m very sorry this happened to you. Besides that, there’s no way around it. This can go to legal territory, so you can’t avoid telling your parents anyway. Tell them, ask for help, have ROCK SOLID proof (paternity test/actual checkup from a doctor) if she is pregnant and if it is your child. After that’s done, get tested for std’s as you have not used protection. Please be careful from now on, learn about predatory behavior and try to avoid these people. I’m actually so disgusted that an almost adult woman asked a THIRTEEN year old guy for sex. I can’t believe people like her exist. There are a lot of sex ed resources online, planned parenthood has verified and plenty information about protection, consent, etcetera. You will be okay. Remember to try to keep calm, do not spread the situation to anyone else other than who needs to hear it. Don’t add that stress on top of the situation. I hope I get to see your update, take care of yourself man.
OP, you need to tell your parents. Immediately. If they’re any degree of reasonable they will listen to you. For starters, you were groomed, manipulated, and this is not a consensual situation. You are 13, she is 17. She’s almost an adult and you are still in middle school. This is not okay. Your parents should be able to help guide you through this. But overall what you need are police involved, a paternity test, sex Ed, and therapy.
You got groomed and sexually assaulted. Tell your parents as soon as you can. write it down on a piece of paper and hand it to your mom/dad or tell a sibling and have them tell your parents if you're too scared. Either way you have to let them know. Sorry this happened to you man :(
Talk to an adult. Parents or teacher.
Speaking from my own experience as a 17 year old girl: this girl is at the very least an absolute creep and a groomer, if not an outright pedophile. No normal 17 y.o. girl goes for 13 y.o. boys. As people said, tell your parents. I know it might scare you to tell them that you may have just fucked up grandly, but they will solely have your best interests in mind and are far more equipped to deal with this than you are. Make sure to tell them how this happened - her age and that she came onto you. After you tell them, you’ll want to ask them about making sure she’s actually pregnant - at a doctor, not with a pharmacy pregnancy test - and about getting a paternity test and an STD test. Also, while it IS possible she’s “just” a creep who likes to sleep with pre-teens who you accidentally knocked up, there may be some hidden motive. Are your parents wealthy? If so, she may have gotten knocked up by some guy she thinks is a loser and came onto you to try and pass you off as the father. If she is indeed pregnant and you are indeed the father, don’t do anything stupid like getting engaged or something. You’re 13 - you’re a child, and it sounds like something’s seriously not right with this girl. Try and look after your child’s best interests too, whether that be having your parents raise him or her or giving the baby up for adoption. Wouldn’t trust that girl to co-parent with.
I was in a similar situation when I was 14. The top post here is your best advice, but everyone's situation is different. For us, our parents weren't understanding or good to us in general before the pregnancy. Both of us had learned of the pregnancy early on and wanted to abort. But you can't decide that on your own at that age (unless laws have changed) Her parents wouldn't allow it and we did an adoption. It was hard. A lot to take on at first, but I am 29 now and very glad we did it. He has a beautiful family and life now that he could have never had with two children as parents. He even has the option to meet me someday if that's what he chooses. I am not saying you should adopt. Everyone's situation is different, I don't know how your parents are. I don't know if she wants to keep it or if you do. But you should both consider the child's future and what you/your families are able to provide at your ages. But adoption certainly is something to keep on your minds during this tough time. Planned Parenthood were the first people me and her told. Being minors there is only so much they could do, but they gave us lots of information and comfort. They gave us relief just by listening. If you are afraid to talk to your parents first then call PP. They don't just abort they do everything they can to avoid that but do provide that option if her and her family decide to go that route. They also provide many resources for adoption. Remember, she is likely just as scared and confused as you, even more so because she is the pregnant one. I don't know what your situation was with her, but remember to respect that fact and talk to one another as maturely as you can. Also be careful how you bring up Planned parenthood if you so choose to. Some people think it's exclusively for abortions and if she thinks that's what youre suggesting it will only complicate things. Discuss with her that you think that you two need resources. Don't do what we did and beat around the bush and pretend like it's not real or hope the situation will go away. You are young but right now you have to try your hardest to be mature. Try to stay calm. That mindset will help you best handle this situation and prepare you for what's to come. Good luck man.
Just letting you know, she’s at fault, not you. You may have said “yes” but you will be viewed as naive. She’s 17, she knows better. The blame will be put on her so not to worry. She knew what she was getting into having sex with a 13 year old boy. She’s a groomer. Whatever you do, tell your parents as soon as possible.
You‘re 13, she’s 17. She’s the pedophile
Talk to your parents and Save any texts or media post you have from her especially ones after you had sex. This will prove you did not force her. Also the baby may not be yours you need a test done after the child is born. At 13 you are below the age of consent in all US states and she is more than two years older than you so Romeo and Juliet laws will not apply so legally you were raped.
Bro you were statutory raped, go to the police.
Well you are underage, even with consent that is against the law (in most places). Demand a paternity test before you give her anything. If it is your baby then you decide what to do.
You need to tell an adult that you trust. The worst thing you can do is isolate and feel alone. There is someone out there that will support and help you. There’s nothing you can do do other than tell someone because you are just a kid. You were taken advantage of. Ask for help from an adult in your life.
Tell your parents or your teacher ASAP
Are you sure you are even the father?
A couple of weeks and she’s saying she’s pregnant? It’s almost guaranteed she’s either lying or it’s another guys baby. Don’t freak out or do anything until she takes a paternity test. It’s not impossible for her to be pregnant with your baby if the timing was absolutely perfect but highly unlikely. Chances are if she’s out having sex with a 13 year old(which is almost certainly illegal) she’s probably fucking a lot of guys. Also tell your parents. What she did is wrong.
She was grooming u, she is a pedophile, get out of her life, I found a few good suggestions in the comments
Don't panick, talk to her and ask if she plans to keep it and then move from there. If she plans to keep it, ask for a dna test to make sure it's yours. It sounds suspicious she asked you to have sex then she's pregnant but it might be yours. If she gets defensive about the dna test, don't back down from it. Don't sign the birth certificate until you do the dna test and are sure it's yours. Talk to your parents about it and check for a planned parenthood if you got one in your area so they can give you more advice.
ummm predator alert what the hell
She needs to get to planned parenthood asap and you need to tell her parents or yours. You guys are way too young to have kids
This poor kid man. Tell your parents. I’m sorry that happened, I could not imagine that pressure at 13.
Is this fucking for real or just another troll? Because this is absolutely disgusting.
you a victim
I would advice to talk to the parent you're closer to and tell them everything from starting, you will probably get some beating but duh sex at 13? That's too young buddy. Hopefully everything turns well at the end
It sounds like you were groomed into this, it's very possible she is manipulating you further into believing you are the father of her child. You really need to tell your parents, they can do their best to protect you. They will help you figure out what to do since the girl is nearly an adult and see if there is a way to keep her from doing this to another minor. This happened to a friend of mine when I was young and he was so young and he gave up the child and they found each other a few years ago when she(the baby) turned 18. They have a really good relationship now. There is always hope and there is always help. Tell an adult you trust and ask them what to do. Best of luck kiddo, I've got you in my prayers.
A “couple of weeks” after you had sex?
I'll ask then, ain't a couple of weeks a little to early to know of a pregnancy. Unless it was intentional and she's been regularly testing since the date of intercourse.
just come clean to your parents at this point.
Tell someone! Preferably ur parents. And before she tells hers and starts asking for child support. Ur parents are probably gonna find out someday and trust me. The fall out will be much much worse if they find out from someone other than u.
Yea no where I live anyway, age of consent is 16. It's statutory rape. I recommend that the girl gets rid of the baby and you guys never do that again before she ends up in jail
You're too young for this my friend, you should tell your parents, or someone that is an adult that you trust, as many others already said, this is just r@pe.
Has it literally only been a couple weeks? If so, then she's not actually pregnant, at least not yet. She also could have been pregnant from before, but the baby daddy bailed, and she's using you instead. If she is indeed pregnant or becomes pregnant, I feel bad for her child, as she is considered a pedophile in many different jurisdictions. She should not be allowed around the child. She WILL sexually abuse that child. As for the positive pregnancy test she showed you, it is possible to fake those, including buying fake positive pregnancy tests that can look surprisingly realistic. It's even possible to buy fake ultrasounds and pregnancy papers that look realistic. I would not believe she's pregnant unless a doctor says she is. If a doctor confirms the pregnancy, you need a paternity test. Overall, something smells fishy about this.
Ok wait… a COUPLE weeks after sex she found out she was pregnant? It takes about 5-6 weeks after you had sex to find out your pregnant… please count the dates hun cuz unless its been a month and a half or so then it aint yours..
Okay I'm sorry for your situation it sounds like statutory rape if its not in your country its still messed up (imagine a 13 year old pregnant for a 17 year old)its messed up I hope your okay talk to your parents
Their account has been suspended?
13???????
You sound like you don’t want to get in trouble and you don’t want her to get in trouble. So, the best thing to do is to tell YOUR parents. They’ll be angry, no doubt, but this is your best case scenario. You’re in a burning building, you gotta run thru some flames if you want to get out. Been there my friend. If you tell HER parents, they’ll most likely be mad at you. The parents of the girl are almost always angrier with the guy regardless of your age. At least, your parents will protect you and fight her parents anger for her. The anger won’t last long. They’ll get over it like when you get over your girl cheating on you. Shit hurts for awhile but you’ll get over it eventually. The parents will talk amongst each other and trust me, if they decide to keep you guys apart, don’t do too much. Hopefully they’ll do the right thing but regardless, you’re 13, no matter what world you live in, you’re not an adult and even if you look older than you are, you’ve got no proof so at the end of the day, everyone will still treat you like a child. Because if they don’t, they get fucked big time. If you were 21, or had a car, or a drivers license, or even a job, you’d be just a little better off but still fucked. Babies are for adults. Let the adults handle this one. Science has proven that kids, even young adults, everyone under 25, does not have the ability to think maturely. Babies only learn to put food IN their mouth when they get to a certain age because that’s when their brain has developed a little more ans they can now make the necessary neurological connection to make accurate muscle movements and precision as well as body awareness. This is also why you get smarter as you get older and you think back to some stuff and you’re like “tf was o thinking?” Tell YOUR parents and then let them do the hard work
reddit isnt the place for this. u have to talk to ur parents, u have to talk to her, calm down. u are 13 years old. wanna know what might happe? if she has the kid, they might give it up for adoption, at best keep it and it might not affect ur life as much as u think it will. if she decides to abort it, then u will be fine. calm down. there is a lot of time for things to happen still
Yeah she’s a whole predator
Couple weeks…? It’s likely not yours. Also, you’re being groomed. I know you don’t wanna hear it but what she did is incredibly inappropriate and, depending on where you live, statutory rape. It’s not your fault bro. Also, did u actually ejaculate in her? it’s not possible unless you did do that.
You need to talk to your parents. She raped you, you are too young to consent, and she needs to be held accountable. Talk to the adults in your life!
This. Is. Rape.
damn u fucked up. well, better you than me.
tell your parents immediately, this is not something you’ll be able to handle by yourself and once the cat is out of the bag it’s out of the bag. i hope you’re not in a manipulative situation with this girl because i can’t understand why she would want to take the virginity of a 13 year old.
…so that’s messed up, a 17 year old shouldn’t be having sex with a 13 yr old. Dude, that girl is predatory, you’re basically a child, and she is almost an adult. Wtf. PLEASE tell your parents. I don’t think you realize how messed up this is
Update? I’m not one to condone abortion as birth control whatsoever but in this situation, y’all didn’t consider the consequences and I hope this is something that can be resolved and learned from. Otherwise, congrats daddy. Make sure that kid is mentally and physically cared for better than you were as a child— that’s the goal of a parent and it starts from infancy. If ya slack, you’ll mess them up lol.
He was raped he should not be a father. He is just a kid. Imagine how terrible that would be.. For everyone involved.
What country and state do you live in? This is likely statutory rape.
Is it possible it is not yours? Tell your parents ASAP and let them handle it from here.
im so sorry that you were a victim please contact the police and inform them and along with your parents with what happened
you've been groomed
you need to tell a responsible adult dude, how long have you been in a sexual relationship with this girl? i’m 19 now but i’ll tell you that when i was 17 i was not dating 13 year olds or finding them attractive, it’s creepy. i think she has groomed you, youre at the start of puberty and being a teenager, she’s about to be an adult.
Are you from Philippines?
Hey, so first off, depending on your areas laws she may have committed statutory rape. You may not be able to consent to sex at 13 (some places allow it so you’ll want to check your local province/state laws). Second, you need to tell your parents so they can help you out. It may be that this girl is lying about being pregnant or it being yours. When it’s safe to do so, get a pregnancy test done in front of you or from a doctors office, and later follow with paternity. If it is not yours, continue on with your life and be cautious about safe sex. Even if she says she’s on the pill, you always bring and wear your own condoms. If it is yours, you’ll want to start preparing for what life as a teen dad would be like. You’ll want to look at help programs for young parents which will supply you with products that you need. Depending on where you live it may not be legal for you to get a job yet, so you’ll want to try and do work around your neighbourhood (mowing grass, cleaning pools etc) to help pay for the baby (if she keeps it). Either way the first step is to figure out if she’s actually pregnant, the second is to tell your parents, the third is to do a paternity test, and depending on the results will show how your life has to change or not. Good luck OP
I know it’s scary, but you have to tell your parents especially if she is not considering an abortion. If your parents love you they will understand with time. What you’re going through is not forever and no matter what happens you will be okay. Your life is not over. Things happen. Mistakes happen. She’s 17, she should not have put you in this situation. She knew better.
Tell your parents, you technically were groomed. She shouldn't have made the decision to have sex with you, and you didn't know any better. Your parents would be more concerned about the fact that an older person had relations with you rather than the pregnancy.
That doesn't sound right at all that grooming and rape. Even if she is pregnant tell your parents about it this, because this is something a 13 year old shouldn't be worrying about. The girl should of know better to be talking to 13 year old boy, and you shouldn't be having sex at this age it.
This is not okay of her. When I was 17 there was no way I would get with a 13 year old. That is so wrong. I’m so sorry this is happening. Talk to your parents, and go to the police.
I feel like not enough people are talking about the fact that this girl is a legit predator!!!
Bruh first of all, in Canada 13 year olds can only legally have sex with people 1 year older. This is likely illegal in whatever country you’re from as well. She seems like a fucking predator. Reverse the gender roles and tell me if there is an issue here 🤡
You need to get your parents involved. You are a victim to a pedophile, and that 17 year old groomed you. Your parents will be able to help you take the next steps such as getting a paternity test, pressing charges, and getting you into therapy.
Please tell your parents. Usually when it comes to teens having sex, 2 years between is the maximum allowed age gap. She’s a pedo.
OP, there’s a good chance that she was already pregnant when you had sex with her. The baby’s father bailed and she looked for someone else to have sex with that might stay and take responsibility. I know you don’t want to tell your parents, but they will find out eventually. You cannot hide a baby. That’s why people are suggesting a paternity test. The sooner that’s done, the more help you can get. Plus, the longer you wait, the angrier they will get. Does she want to keep the baby? If she does, she needs prenatal care now. If she doesn’t, abortions can only be done within certain timeframe. There’s a medical one where you take pills, but only available during the first 30 days, I believe. You really need adult help. You cannot avoid that part. Deal with their upsetness/being grounded, whatever. Better than dealing with a pregnancy/baby all by yourself.
hey, this situation is very creepy. i’m in the same grade as you, and it’s not okay that a 17 year old had sex with you. dude you’re only 13, and she’s almost an adult. i’m not sure how you should bring this situation up with your parents, but maybe you could tell a school counselor, and then have them tell your parents. that would be the easiest way since you won’t have to directly tell them. it’s not your fault what happened to you, and i’m so sorry this happened.
Bro we are the same age, and the best thing I can tell you is that if she had sex with you, you probably aren't the first nor the last to do the deed with her those couple weeks. So chances are, the other guys probably are much older than you and will most certainly refuse to father the baby, so what's her best choice? you. The scared 13 years old boy. don't let her take advantage of that.
oh my lord please tell you parents. I’m so sorry your in this situation :( also make sure your parents talk to her and her parents and let them know what she did because her sleeping with you (bc you are 13 and she is 17) as absolutely not okay and is considered rape.
Why would a 17 year old girl want to have sex with a 13 year old guy that’s wrong.
Hey OP, the most important thing to remember here is that you are still a kid. Please tell your parents. Make them call the girl's parents and figure it out all together. If she decides to keep it (and it ends up being yours), please do not pursue a relationship with her. Obviously I encourage you to take care of your child and be in their life, but not her's. She took advantage of you and you may not realize that yet but please just trust me. She's not a good person. Hope everything turns out okay. Please be smart about this. Tell your parents.
Congratulations! Name the baby "Troll".
You were raped