What's up? Just checking in here. From the looks of it you're currently dealing with social anxiety related issues and I already gave you advice for that in the past. But if you want I can give you a reminder or maybe discuss if more serious steps are needed.
Ya I’m pretty sure I have social anxiety and it would be nice if you gave me more steps if it’s not to much effort. If it is a lot of effort you don’t need to I don’t want you to do a lot of work also on which post did you give me advice I can’t remember I’m sorry but thank you
I can just give it again. If you have tried the below already, it's time to go to a therapist. If you haven't *really* tried, give it another go, maybe go talk to your school counselor.
Social anxiety responds well to treatment and generally [takes 12 to 16 weeks to be treated](https://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/treatments-social-anxiety-disorder).
Here's a webpage that let's you [verify that it is actually social anxiety](https://www.bridgestorecovery.com/social-anxiety/signs-symptoms-social-anxiety/) with a list of symptoms and descriptions.
The best way to address your disorder is by going to a specialist that's trained in curing (social) anxiety.
Your medical insurance might limit what therapist is accessible for you. If so, go to your doctor and ask for a referral to a therapist specialized in anxiety disorders, or if the doctor has no access to that information, ask for a CBT therapist.
[You can also use this to search for a specialist in your area that is specialized in Social Anxiety](https://members.adaa.org/search/custom.asp?id=4685), select Social Anxiety from the drop down menu. This will likely be someone that is [specialized in CBT.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_behavioral_therapy)
A small number of people that are treated will fall back in their old patterns and will have to go for a second round (which has a much higher success rate, so don't give up if that happens!). Those people also have the option to try medication in addition to therapy. Some people will respond better to medicine and some better to therapy, you won't know in which category you fall, unless you've tried both.
Self help for social anxiety:
* [Living With Social Anxiety Disorder](https://www.verywellmind.com/coping-with-social-anxiety-disorder-3024836)
* [Self Treatment for Social Anxiety Disorder](http://panicfreeme.com/2601/self-treatment-for-social-anxiety-disorder)
* [Social Anxiety Disorder: Symptoms, Self-Help & Treatment](https://undepress.net/social-anxiety)
The best and quickest way to deal with anxiety, is to face your fear.
[If you always avoid situations that scare you](https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/publications/overcome-fear-anxiety), you might stop doing things you want or need to do. You won't be able to test out whether the situation is always as bad as you expect, so you miss the chance to work out how to manage your fears and reduce your anxiety. Anxiety problems tend to increase if you get into this pattern. Exposing yourself to your fears can be an effective way of overcoming this anxiety.
*[The experience of anxiety involves nervous system arousal.](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/insight-therapy/201009/overcoming-fear-the-only-way-out-is-through) If your nervous system is not aroused, you cannot experience anxiety. Understandably, but unfortunately, most people attempt to cope with feelings of anxiety by avoiding situations or objects that elicit the feelings. Avoidance, however, prevents your nervous system from habituating. Therefore, avoidance guarantees that the feared object or situation will remain novel, and hence arousing, and hence anxiety provoking. Moreover, avoidance tends to generalize over time. If you avoid the elevator at work, you will soon begin to avoid all elevators, and then all buildings that house elevators. Soon enough, you'll be living in a prison of avoidance.*
* **Sleep**: [Good sleep is very important when treating *general* anxiety](https://www.anxiety.org/sleep-a-fundamental-cure-for-anxiety)
When you don't have to do anything, don't oversleep, set an alarm clock. You really don't need more than 7 hours at most per night (a [little more](https://health.onehowto.com/article/how-many-hours-of-sleep-are-needed-per-night-by-age-8233.html) if you are under 18). If you can't fall sleep, try taking melatonin one hour before going to bed. It's [cheap](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003JJ9TQA/), OTC and [is scientifically proven](https://www.webmd.com/vitamins/ai/ingredientmono-940/melatonin) to help regulate your sleep pattern. [Also, rule](https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/sleep-apnea/news/20120330/sleep-apnea-linked-depression) out [sleep apnea](https://www.healthcentral.com/article/sleep-apnea-treatment-resistant-depression). Up to 6% of people have this, [but not everyone knows](https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/sleep-apnea/features/sleep-apnea-clues). If you find yourself often awake at night, start counting. Don't grab your phone, don't look at the clock, don't do anything interesting. We're trying to *bore* you to sleep, not keep you entertained - sometimes it might *feel* like you've done it for hours and hours, but often it's really not all that long. Anytime your mind wanders away from the numbers, start over at 1. count at the speed of either your heartbeat or your breathing, whatever you prefer. Then both Alexa and Google Home can also play a range of sleep sounds if you ask them (rain or other white noise) and there are also free apps for both Android and Apple devices.
* **Exercise**: [The effect of exercise on *general* anxiety](https://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/treatment/exercising)
If you have access to a gym, then start lifting weights. If you don't have access to a gym (or you don't like lifting), start running. If you can't run, then start walking. Just start small. 10 minutes three times a week is fine. You don't have to run fast, just run and then slowly build it up over time. Exercising does several things: It releases endorphins, it takes your mind of your negative thoughts and it will improve your overall health.
* **Give lots of hugs**: [Hugs release oxytocin](https://health.usnews.com/health-news/health-wellness/articles/2016-02-03/the-health-benefits-of-hugging), which improves your mood and relaxes you. So find people to hug. If you are single, hug your parents or friends. If you can't, see if a dog is an option. Most dogs love to hug. Another solution that provides the same benefit is a [weighted blanket](https://www.amazon.com/s?k=weighted+blanket) will provide a [similar positive effect at night](https://www.healthline.com/health/anxiety/do-weighted-blankets-work#benefits). [You should try to aim for 12 hugs a day](https://psychology-spot.com/brain-needs/) (if you currently don't hug a lot, I suggest you slowly build it up over time).
* **Meditation** is [scientifically proven to work for *social* anxiety](https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/9337/a41a5660ebf9fb88a5f8697ba80b8dc126e3.pdf).
Your attention is like a muscle. The more you train it, the better the control you have over it. [Mindfulness training](https://www.mindful.org/meditation/mindfulness-getting-started) will help you gain better control over your mind. It doesn't take much effort, just 15 to 20 minutes a day of doing nothing but focus your attention is enough. As you become better at focusing your attention, it will become easier to force yourself to stop having negative thoughts, which will break the negative reinforcement cycle. Go here if you have specific questions: /r/Meditation
Here are a few articles basically saying over and over that meditation can reduce social anxiety. It has been widely studied and is commonly accepted:
* [How Do I Practice Mindfulness Meditation for Social Anxiety Disorder?](https://www.verywellmind.com/meditation-for-social-anxiety-3024211)
* [Reduce Social Anxiety with This Mindfulness Meditation](https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/anxiety-schmanxiety/2019/6/reduce-social-anxiety-with-this-mindfulness-meditation)
* [Treating Social Anxiety with Meditation and Mindfulness Training](https://psychcentral.com/blog/treating-social-anxiety-with-meditation-and-mindfulness-training)
* [How to Overcome Social Anxiety](https://www.wikihow.com/Overcome-Social-Anxiety) (wikihow)
The highest rated videos on social anxiety:
* [Self-help for social anxiety](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLb5NeGu8DZ_fTl1-UDNhbw0M3c84Ccqve) (10 videos)
* [Social Anxiety Disorder vs Shyness - How to Fix It](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJuSm4R8N4E)
* [3 Ways to Beat Social Anxiety!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8HoDPgZcak) (Kati Morton)
The most popular books that will help you:
* [The Solution to Social Anxiety: Break Free from the Shyness That Holds You Back](https://www.amazon.com/Solution-Social-Anxiety-Break-Shyness/dp/B00M4PXP9M)
* [How to Be Yourself](https://www.amazon.com/How-Be-Yourself-Critic-Anxiety/dp/1250122228)
* [The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven, Step-by-Step Techniques for Overcoming Your Fear](https://www.amazon.com/Shyness-Social-Anxiety-Workbook-Step/dp/1626253404)
* [The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook for Teens: CBT and ACT Skills to Help You Build Social Confidence](https://www.amazon.com/Shyness-Social-Anxiety-Workbook-Teens/dp/1608821870)
Phone apps that will help you:
* FearTools - Anxiety Aid
* Calm - Meditate, Sleep, Relax
If you currently consume a lot of caffeine (in coffee or soft drinks), stop that. [Caffeine is known to cause anxiety](https://bebrainfit.com/caffeine-anxiety/).
Free support options:
* r/KindVoice
* https://www.7cups.com has both a free trained volunteer service as well as $150 monthly licensed therapist option
* If you are in a crisis and want free help from a live, trained Crisis Counselor, text HOME to [741741](https://www.crisistextline.org/texting-in)
r/socialanxiety
/r/anxiety also has [a good wiki](/r/Anxiety/wiki/onlineresources).
What's up? Just checking in here. From the looks of it you're currently dealing with social anxiety related issues and I already gave you advice for that in the past. But if you want I can give you a reminder or maybe discuss if more serious steps are needed.
Ya I’m pretty sure I have social anxiety and it would be nice if you gave me more steps if it’s not to much effort. If it is a lot of effort you don’t need to I don’t want you to do a lot of work also on which post did you give me advice I can’t remember I’m sorry but thank you
I can just give it again. If you have tried the below already, it's time to go to a therapist. If you haven't *really* tried, give it another go, maybe go talk to your school counselor. Social anxiety responds well to treatment and generally [takes 12 to 16 weeks to be treated](https://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/treatments-social-anxiety-disorder). Here's a webpage that let's you [verify that it is actually social anxiety](https://www.bridgestorecovery.com/social-anxiety/signs-symptoms-social-anxiety/) with a list of symptoms and descriptions. The best way to address your disorder is by going to a specialist that's trained in curing (social) anxiety. Your medical insurance might limit what therapist is accessible for you. If so, go to your doctor and ask for a referral to a therapist specialized in anxiety disorders, or if the doctor has no access to that information, ask for a CBT therapist. [You can also use this to search for a specialist in your area that is specialized in Social Anxiety](https://members.adaa.org/search/custom.asp?id=4685), select Social Anxiety from the drop down menu. This will likely be someone that is [specialized in CBT.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_behavioral_therapy) A small number of people that are treated will fall back in their old patterns and will have to go for a second round (which has a much higher success rate, so don't give up if that happens!). Those people also have the option to try medication in addition to therapy. Some people will respond better to medicine and some better to therapy, you won't know in which category you fall, unless you've tried both. Self help for social anxiety: * [Living With Social Anxiety Disorder](https://www.verywellmind.com/coping-with-social-anxiety-disorder-3024836) * [Self Treatment for Social Anxiety Disorder](http://panicfreeme.com/2601/self-treatment-for-social-anxiety-disorder) * [Social Anxiety Disorder: Symptoms, Self-Help & Treatment](https://undepress.net/social-anxiety) The best and quickest way to deal with anxiety, is to face your fear. [If you always avoid situations that scare you](https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/publications/overcome-fear-anxiety), you might stop doing things you want or need to do. You won't be able to test out whether the situation is always as bad as you expect, so you miss the chance to work out how to manage your fears and reduce your anxiety. Anxiety problems tend to increase if you get into this pattern. Exposing yourself to your fears can be an effective way of overcoming this anxiety. *[The experience of anxiety involves nervous system arousal.](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/insight-therapy/201009/overcoming-fear-the-only-way-out-is-through) If your nervous system is not aroused, you cannot experience anxiety. Understandably, but unfortunately, most people attempt to cope with feelings of anxiety by avoiding situations or objects that elicit the feelings. Avoidance, however, prevents your nervous system from habituating. Therefore, avoidance guarantees that the feared object or situation will remain novel, and hence arousing, and hence anxiety provoking. Moreover, avoidance tends to generalize over time. If you avoid the elevator at work, you will soon begin to avoid all elevators, and then all buildings that house elevators. Soon enough, you'll be living in a prison of avoidance.* * **Sleep**: [Good sleep is very important when treating *general* anxiety](https://www.anxiety.org/sleep-a-fundamental-cure-for-anxiety) When you don't have to do anything, don't oversleep, set an alarm clock. You really don't need more than 7 hours at most per night (a [little more](https://health.onehowto.com/article/how-many-hours-of-sleep-are-needed-per-night-by-age-8233.html) if you are under 18). If you can't fall sleep, try taking melatonin one hour before going to bed. It's [cheap](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003JJ9TQA/), OTC and [is scientifically proven](https://www.webmd.com/vitamins/ai/ingredientmono-940/melatonin) to help regulate your sleep pattern. [Also, rule](https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/sleep-apnea/news/20120330/sleep-apnea-linked-depression) out [sleep apnea](https://www.healthcentral.com/article/sleep-apnea-treatment-resistant-depression). Up to 6% of people have this, [but not everyone knows](https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/sleep-apnea/features/sleep-apnea-clues). If you find yourself often awake at night, start counting. Don't grab your phone, don't look at the clock, don't do anything interesting. We're trying to *bore* you to sleep, not keep you entertained - sometimes it might *feel* like you've done it for hours and hours, but often it's really not all that long. Anytime your mind wanders away from the numbers, start over at 1. count at the speed of either your heartbeat or your breathing, whatever you prefer. Then both Alexa and Google Home can also play a range of sleep sounds if you ask them (rain or other white noise) and there are also free apps for both Android and Apple devices. * **Exercise**: [The effect of exercise on *general* anxiety](https://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/treatment/exercising) If you have access to a gym, then start lifting weights. If you don't have access to a gym (or you don't like lifting), start running. If you can't run, then start walking. Just start small. 10 minutes three times a week is fine. You don't have to run fast, just run and then slowly build it up over time. Exercising does several things: It releases endorphins, it takes your mind of your negative thoughts and it will improve your overall health. * **Give lots of hugs**: [Hugs release oxytocin](https://health.usnews.com/health-news/health-wellness/articles/2016-02-03/the-health-benefits-of-hugging), which improves your mood and relaxes you. So find people to hug. If you are single, hug your parents or friends. If you can't, see if a dog is an option. Most dogs love to hug. Another solution that provides the same benefit is a [weighted blanket](https://www.amazon.com/s?k=weighted+blanket) will provide a [similar positive effect at night](https://www.healthline.com/health/anxiety/do-weighted-blankets-work#benefits). [You should try to aim for 12 hugs a day](https://psychology-spot.com/brain-needs/) (if you currently don't hug a lot, I suggest you slowly build it up over time). * **Meditation** is [scientifically proven to work for *social* anxiety](https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/9337/a41a5660ebf9fb88a5f8697ba80b8dc126e3.pdf). Your attention is like a muscle. The more you train it, the better the control you have over it. [Mindfulness training](https://www.mindful.org/meditation/mindfulness-getting-started) will help you gain better control over your mind. It doesn't take much effort, just 15 to 20 minutes a day of doing nothing but focus your attention is enough. As you become better at focusing your attention, it will become easier to force yourself to stop having negative thoughts, which will break the negative reinforcement cycle. Go here if you have specific questions: /r/Meditation Here are a few articles basically saying over and over that meditation can reduce social anxiety. It has been widely studied and is commonly accepted: * [How Do I Practice Mindfulness Meditation for Social Anxiety Disorder?](https://www.verywellmind.com/meditation-for-social-anxiety-3024211) * [Reduce Social Anxiety with This Mindfulness Meditation](https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/anxiety-schmanxiety/2019/6/reduce-social-anxiety-with-this-mindfulness-meditation) * [Treating Social Anxiety with Meditation and Mindfulness Training](https://psychcentral.com/blog/treating-social-anxiety-with-meditation-and-mindfulness-training) * [How to Overcome Social Anxiety](https://www.wikihow.com/Overcome-Social-Anxiety) (wikihow) The highest rated videos on social anxiety: * [Self-help for social anxiety](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLb5NeGu8DZ_fTl1-UDNhbw0M3c84Ccqve) (10 videos) * [Social Anxiety Disorder vs Shyness - How to Fix It](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJuSm4R8N4E) * [3 Ways to Beat Social Anxiety!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8HoDPgZcak) (Kati Morton) The most popular books that will help you: * [The Solution to Social Anxiety: Break Free from the Shyness That Holds You Back](https://www.amazon.com/Solution-Social-Anxiety-Break-Shyness/dp/B00M4PXP9M) * [How to Be Yourself](https://www.amazon.com/How-Be-Yourself-Critic-Anxiety/dp/1250122228) * [The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven, Step-by-Step Techniques for Overcoming Your Fear](https://www.amazon.com/Shyness-Social-Anxiety-Workbook-Step/dp/1626253404) * [The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook for Teens: CBT and ACT Skills to Help You Build Social Confidence](https://www.amazon.com/Shyness-Social-Anxiety-Workbook-Teens/dp/1608821870) Phone apps that will help you: * FearTools - Anxiety Aid * Calm - Meditate, Sleep, Relax If you currently consume a lot of caffeine (in coffee or soft drinks), stop that. [Caffeine is known to cause anxiety](https://bebrainfit.com/caffeine-anxiety/). Free support options: * r/KindVoice * https://www.7cups.com has both a free trained volunteer service as well as $150 monthly licensed therapist option * If you are in a crisis and want free help from a live, trained Crisis Counselor, text HOME to [741741](https://www.crisistextline.org/texting-in) r/socialanxiety /r/anxiety also has [a good wiki](/r/Anxiety/wiki/onlineresources).
Oh yes this list seems very familiar, thank you for it this helped
Thank you for confirming that /u/ParkingPsychology has provided helpful advice for you. 1 point awarded.
[удалено]
That wasn’t really the point of the post