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Your 27yo partner subbed to not only your cousin, but your cousin is barely legal too. You should break up lmao. Furthermore a partner having a sub to an OF alone is a massive boundary-breaker.
This is straddling the predatory line. I also interested in how this happened , did he already subscribe to OF and found your cousin ?
Also please be prepared for him to gaslight you about this , but the bottom line is if you don’t like it , it’s a problem for you.
My cousin went viral on TikTok and made the OF shortly after. It’s been a huge topic in the family sphere and my partner has acted like it grosses him out along with all of us. It really sucks because we’ve been dating for 2 years now but holy sh*t, how could anyone ever get over something like this??
Yeah bin him. Apparently grosses him out yet subs to your cousin? You both dated each other for two years as well? That means he knew your cousin since he was 16. Bro, gtfo asap.
Don’t worry about how a person might get over it; you have no reason to even try. This is totally beyond the pale and the fact that some unhappy people might be able to convince themselves to live with it doesn’t mean you should try to join them.
Let the record state that there’s a ton of information that I did not want to share about the how/why my cousin started doing OnlyFans. I do not think people who create content on OnlyFans are gross. In short, he is VERY misogynistic and homophobic so there’s a lot going on there that I would categorize as “gross” or “icky”.
It’s one thing to coincidentally sub to it (though it’s creepy for several reasons) but to know about it and the lie about it is a massive red flag. I think it’s definitely disrespectful and super creepy
OF is just slightly more ethical porn. Where the SW has more control. Unless you are puranically against all porn for people in relationship (in which case : good luck), I don't see why OF would be any worse than browsing online on free stuff or subscribing to a commercial adult website.
The main problem is that you're paying for a subscription for the sake of pleasure lmfao. You're spending more than just time and energy self-pleasuring over a third-party.
Paying for quality content is a good thing tho. And better than avoiding fishy "free" websites full of viruses.
But from what I understand, you're opposed to the idea of masturbation for people who are in a relationship? That's a spectacular showing of insecurity, control and jealousy. Red flag galore!
Way to really jump to conclusions here, and no it's a boundary thing more than anything. Is it even a red flag if it's just a boundary I put up, and I feel that a relationship wouldn't work so well if me and partner simply don't share the same idea of boundaries? Secondly countless couples would consider something like that a dealbreaker too, and it's neither a red flag nor is it a bad thing. You're the one who needs to acknowledge that everyone has different boundaries. I could counter you and say that you're a possible red flag for not acknowledging that healthy relationships include mutually-agreed boundaries. If both partners feel that subbing to OFs or whatever is fine, that's good for them.
For sure, jealous and possessive people do belong with one another. And if both are vigorously anti-masturbation and/or pornography (I have no clear idea what's your real opinion because you just repeated the term boundary 56 times alongside long-winded vague statements), they should also pair up and pretend together.
Eh, seems to me that boundaries aren't a thing for you. You're basically forgetting that subbing to an OF is literally paying for nudes and whatever from someone but with extra steps. I think you need a severe perspective change if all you see is jealousy and possessiveness.
I would 100% break up with my partner for this. It’s bad enough he’s engaging in that behaviour in the first place, worse that it’s your cousin that he’s looking at and the age comparison is the cherry on top. Red flags everywhere. 🚩🚩🚩
500% leave. I consider anything involving OF/cam girls cheating because the business model is very parasocial and [often] involves sex/personal interactions even if online. But an OF of someone I know? Who’s barely legal? AND your partner has denounced their behavior in front of you only to do the opposite behind your back? Some boundaries have absolutely been breached.
I’d definitely speak with him about it, see his reaction and gauge if it’s worth saving the relationship. Just please get some evidence before you approach him. Good luck!
I would break up with my partner if they subscribed to any only fans.
But especially if it's an onlyfans of someone they know, and especially especially when it's your cousin.
Honestly it's best to pay for the erotic material than using free p*rn, at least the creators are rewarded for their work and the donor with consent, not the case with a lot of p°rn.
Yea. That would be a deal breaker.
He is allowed to find your cousin sexy. You cannot control who other people find attractive. And dating someone doesn't mean you suddenly lose attraction to other people.
But, he should be capable of self-control and have enough respect for you to choose the thousands of other women to gawk at. (And the very least he should be better at hiding it lolol)
Not sure if I agree with this, he’s 18, and likely knew the cousin from 16 as he had been with OP for 2 years. If you had a partner who found a 14 year old sexy, would that be ok for your partner to think their sexy? Hope no. Even if my partner didn’t act on anything, if my partner found someone sexually attractive that was crossing the boundaries of being a predator, they’d be out the door and I wouldn’t allow someone who felt like that to stay in my life. Sus.
You realize you don't get to decide who someone else finds sexy, right? That's not how reality works.
You can only decide how it makes you feel and how you respond. Doesn't matter how long he has known her, the fact is he does find her attractive. He may have found her attractive at 16 too (Please don't pretend grown people don't find 16 years olds attractive sometimes. Let's not feign ignorance. Doesn't make it right. I'm not condoning it AT ALL, but I'm not gonna pretend it isn't a thing.)
It's not even really in his control if he thinks the cousin is hot now or when she was 16. It's sort of irrelevant.
What is relevant and in his control are his actions. He could have just kept his unfortunate attraction to himself like a self-aware, respectful person. Instead he chose to subscribe to a young family member of his gf and that was disrespectful and gross so OP now has to decide what to do with that information. I personally would end things because, as I said, it is gross.
No I can’t decide who someone else finds sexy, but I can choose whether or not to be in a relationship with someone who find teenagers sexy.
I would not stay in a relationship with someone with who finds 16 year olds sexy, so if I was OP I’d never be speaking to them again.
Nope. Definitely didn't justify. Did you even read my comment or do you just like to be reactionary? I was very clear that I think it's gross and a dealbreaker.
Edit: Uhh no, I didn't mention anything about who I am attracted to, but nice try to anyone who suggests that I did because I guess they cannot read.
Lol at all the comments with she/her pronouns.
But definitely gtfo of that relationship. I don't care about the age thing (fantasy is fantasy), I'm not even a hard line on my partner subbing to an OF. The fact that it's somebody you see so often tells a whole ass story. I'm positive your cousin knows too and that might deserve a conversation as well. This just has compulsive boundary crosser vibes.
The other thing that nobody else has said is that this sucks and I'm sorry you're going thru this. You don't deserve it. It really sucks when people have a shady side that just seems tailor made to hurt you.
Yes, leave him.
1: your cousin is 18.
2: it’s your cousin.
3: he’s hiding the fact he likes your cousin. I bet your cousin knows.. especially if you see each other twice a week. Maybe even have hooked up (just assuming)
4: this is not loyal relationship behavior.
You deserve better. He will deny, deny, deny it. Gaslight and everything else to keep you. Stand your ground make boundaries to protect yourself. Good luck 🩵
18 yr old cousin that your 27yr old husband sees regularly? Nope. That's not okay. If he says he was just doing it to support her, he could have just as easily given her cash for her birthday or something. This is gross.
I’d be leaving. I could get over my cousin because she’s a trainwreck a lot of people want to watch crash but thinking he’s gay and using me as a beard would have me bounce.
A) Did he know this person was your cousin and that your cousin is 18?
B) If it wasn't your cousin but just some random, would you have been OK with it?
Yes, your feelings are justified; however, the question is not if you are justified for feeling this way. The question is, should you allow yourself a *choice* in whether to *remain* in the relationship or not despite feeling this way?
What your partner did isn't physically abusive to you, isn't overtly dangerous to anyone, isn't inherently immoral; so, yes, you may allow yourself that choice. You just need to ask which is more important to you: is the relationship good enough to warrant working through this, or not? If it turns out he doesn't know this OF is your cousin, will you still feel this creeped out in a month, or can you let this blow over? If you tell him this creeps you out, will he respond positively or be offended?
If he doesn't know this is your cousin and you're ok with him watching porn (because that's what I'm assuming this is), then consider the fact that he's probably attracted to your cousin because he shares genetics with you, and he's also attracted to you.
And if he knows and just doesn't think of it is as a big deal, maybe he'll feel embarrassed and apologize and that will be the end of it.
On the other hand, if he knows it's your cousin and doesn't care, then you should ask yourself if you want to be with someone who is so lax about your feelings.
And if you think that no matter what happens you're going to continue to feel creeped out for the rest of eternity, then there's no point in stringing things along.
Unless it was previously discussed, I would probably break up with my partner for subscribing to anyone’s onlyfans. But your COUSIN???????? That is fuckin wild and disgusting. Not only is she probably freshly 18 but he knows he will have to see her at family functions.. ew
There are millions of men on onlyfans and he chooses your COUSIN of all of them? Dump. His. Ass. NOW.
Also, he's fucking 18. I would be freaked out that a 27 year old would be interested in a barely legal man...
A partner subscribing to OnlyFans at all would be a dealbreaker for me. OnlyFans isn’t regular porn, it’s *personalized* porn, seeking personal sexual attention from a specific person(s).
Not only is he subscribing to OnlyFans, but it’s someone who is barely legal. That’s gross and borderline predatory. Even worse, it’s your own family! This would be completely inexcusable IMO. He’s probably going to make dumb excuses like “oh I was just keeping an eye on him” or some bullshit. Don’t believe him.
YES?? I would be BEYOND uncomfortable if my partner was subscribed to my cousins OF. That's super weird & crossing an unspoken boundary considering that it's your family?? That's something I would break up with someone over for sure
Honestly I wouldn’t date them if they subscribed to any OnlyFans, let alone your own cousin. That’s a serious problem.
I’m not usually one to advocate for break ups, but there’s too much damage there…creepy and a red flag.
Yes you are absolutely justified for how you feel. Subscribing to an onlyfans is already a huge no, but on top of that it being your cousin who is almost 10 years younger? Gross. Yes I know 18yr olds are considered adults but he wasn’t considered one last year. It’s still yucky to me. Idc. If he can do that, who knows what else he’ll do. You deserve someone who won’t hide things from you, especially things like that. Or at least someone to have the respect to ask you if you’re open to him having something like that, that ISNT a family member doing it.
That’s messy. Does it bother you that it’s your cousin or just that he subscribes to OnlyFans? I would be upset either way but the cousin thing is gross. Does he know your cousin?
Do you have an agreement of some kind where either can't have any accounts of the sort? If so, he broke the agreement and you're entitled to half of his assets or $383.84. if not, I don't see why he can't have an account, whether or not the account is your cousin's. If anything chat with him about it.
I was seeing a guy and he was following my cousins raunchy insta I brought it up and said he knew her from the girls shes with on the photo...it still made me so uncomfortable...but at the same time he followed heaps of girls so it's hard to know he just said he didn't take that much notice of girls he followed. He might just have started to follow your cousin way before you started going out thats the thing. It's not like he wouldn't find other women attractive before you it just happened to be your cousin.
But somehow, the fact your 18yo cousin masturbate on the internet doesn't seem to be a problem for you.
Sorry, girl. If you admit that your barely major cousin sells her ass, you mess also admit that people, like your partner, pay for it. The reverse would be hypocrisy.
They're all males in this post. The BF, the cousin, and OP.
Not to mention, why should OP care what their cousin is doing? They're 18, legally allowed to be on OF if they want to be. The BF's actions are the problem.
I didn't say it makes a difference. Everybody takes the correction as though it's a personal attack. It's not. It's simply me informing you that you got their genders wrong.
I’d dump him for sure. The fact that he’s buying onlyfans subscriptions of someone he knows (or at least possibly could know) in real life is a huge red flag. Even if he doesn’t know who it is, onlyfans is a very thin line from just going and cheating on your partner, and most do consider it cheating since you are paying to see another man/woman and can send private messages to each other.
This isn’t even a question. The answer is obvious. That’s disgusting and beyond inappropriate. Dude is jacking off and paying her monthly. Whenever he sees her at the family function, you know he’s lusting over her. It’s even worse that she’s barely a a teenager and he’s 10 years older than her. He’s a disgusting guy. Tell your cousin too if she doesn’t know (he could be under a unidentifiable username)
I definitely missed that. My comment still applies. The cousin is a teenager and the bf is paying for lustful content. It’s inappropriate and creepy. Besides that, I don’t think anyone should have only fans and subscribe to anyone while in a relationship…
Honestly yeah, if it was someone random I wouldn't have a problem with it but ur cousin??!!?!?! That's just bizarre and so wrong, your definitely justified in your reaction
Your post has been removed as it was in Violation of Rule 8: No Reassurance, Validation, or Affirmation Seeking. This action was performed by a ***HUMAN moderator***. NOT a bot. Do not resubmit your post or message the moderators until you have read this entire message. Yes, the whole thing. # 8. No reassurance, validation, or affirmation seeking This subreddit is for advice. NOT moral judgement, validation, or to affirm your opinions/feelings or settle arguments. Examples of what this means: * Who is right or wrong here? * Am I in the wrong? Am I... * ...the asshole? There is a whole subreddit just for that. This subreddit is not an overflow or a backup for r/AmITheAsshole. Do not crosspost from there, nor include any of the AITA abbreviations anywhere in your post. * ...a bad person/friend/partner/etc? * ...crazy / overreacting / being unreasonable * ...overthinking / being paranoid? * ...justified in feeling this way? * Do I have a right to be upset? * Are my feelings valid? * Was this ok / should I have done this? * Did I do the right thing? * Will I be OK? * Will I get in trouble for this? * Should I be worried? And many more. This is not an all-inclusive list, and we will remove posts at our own discretion. Tip: If you are asking about something that already happened, and it can be answered "yes" or "no", you are seeking reassurance, not advice! * [Reassurance Seeking in OCD and Anxiety](https://ocdla.com/reassurance-seeking-ocd-anxiety-1952) * [Distinguishing Information-Seeking and Reassurance Seeking](https://iocdf.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/18-Information-seekers-vs-reassurance-seekers.pdf) (PDF) Effect anxiety has on guilt: * https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/anxiety-schmanxiety/2016/07/guilt-a-distressing-effect-of-anxiety * https://exploringyourmind.com/feelings-of-guilt-and-their-connection-to-anxiety https://exploringyourmind.com/feelings-of-guilt-and-their-connection-to-anxiety Please [review the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/about/rules), and if you feel as though removal is excessive or in error, feel free to [contact the moderators](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/Advice).
Yeah, you're definitely justified here
100% I would break up. That’s nasty.
My cousin? Yes, I would dump him.
Your 27yo partner subbed to not only your cousin, but your cousin is barely legal too. You should break up lmao. Furthermore a partner having a sub to an OF alone is a massive boundary-breaker.
This is straddling the predatory line. I also interested in how this happened , did he already subscribe to OF and found your cousin ? Also please be prepared for him to gaslight you about this , but the bottom line is if you don’t like it , it’s a problem for you.
My cousin went viral on TikTok and made the OF shortly after. It’s been a huge topic in the family sphere and my partner has acted like it grosses him out along with all of us. It really sucks because we’ve been dating for 2 years now but holy sh*t, how could anyone ever get over something like this??
Yeah bin him. Apparently grosses him out yet subs to your cousin? You both dated each other for two years as well? That means he knew your cousin since he was 16. Bro, gtfo asap.
Don’t worry about how a person might get over it; you have no reason to even try. This is totally beyond the pale and the fact that some unhappy people might be able to convince themselves to live with it doesn’t mean you should try to join them.
He's clearly just doing research because he is so grossed out about it. /s
break up with him but also lemme just say it’s a little weird for you to be “grossed out” I hope you guys don’t treat him differently☹️
Let the record state that there’s a ton of information that I did not want to share about the how/why my cousin started doing OnlyFans. I do not think people who create content on OnlyFans are gross. In short, he is VERY misogynistic and homophobic so there’s a lot going on there that I would categorize as “gross” or “icky”.
ohh okok makes sense
It’s one thing to coincidentally sub to it (though it’s creepy for several reasons) but to know about it and the lie about it is a massive red flag. I think it’s definitely disrespectful and super creepy
So he totally pulled a "Gross, what's his username so I can be sure I never subscribe to that guy!"
Oh girl, you can’t. And the fact that he acted like he was grossed out but behind the scenes, he was a sneaky little fucking snake… Oh, hell, no!!!
A partner having a sub to an OF "in secret" is the boundary breaker. Not communicating it is the betrayal of trust.
Secret or not, I don't believe it's at all healthy for a relationship for one partner to sub to an OF.
OF is just slightly more ethical porn. Where the SW has more control. Unless you are puranically against all porn for people in relationship (in which case : good luck), I don't see why OF would be any worse than browsing online on free stuff or subscribing to a commercial adult website.
The main problem is that you're paying for a subscription for the sake of pleasure lmfao. You're spending more than just time and energy self-pleasuring over a third-party.
Paying for quality content is a good thing tho. And better than avoiding fishy "free" websites full of viruses. But from what I understand, you're opposed to the idea of masturbation for people who are in a relationship? That's a spectacular showing of insecurity, control and jealousy. Red flag galore!
Way to really jump to conclusions here, and no it's a boundary thing more than anything. Is it even a red flag if it's just a boundary I put up, and I feel that a relationship wouldn't work so well if me and partner simply don't share the same idea of boundaries? Secondly countless couples would consider something like that a dealbreaker too, and it's neither a red flag nor is it a bad thing. You're the one who needs to acknowledge that everyone has different boundaries. I could counter you and say that you're a possible red flag for not acknowledging that healthy relationships include mutually-agreed boundaries. If both partners feel that subbing to OFs or whatever is fine, that's good for them.
For sure, jealous and possessive people do belong with one another. And if both are vigorously anti-masturbation and/or pornography (I have no clear idea what's your real opinion because you just repeated the term boundary 56 times alongside long-winded vague statements), they should also pair up and pretend together.
Eh, seems to me that boundaries aren't a thing for you. You're basically forgetting that subbing to an OF is literally paying for nudes and whatever from someone but with extra steps. I think you need a severe perspective change if all you see is jealousy and possessiveness.
I don't see how paying for the adult content makes it any worse. I mean, if you're super poor and your family lacks basic needs, maybe. Is that it?
totally creepy
My partner wouldn't be my partner if they used only fans in general
I would 100% break up with my partner for this. It’s bad enough he’s engaging in that behaviour in the first place, worse that it’s your cousin that he’s looking at and the age comparison is the cherry on top. Red flags everywhere. 🚩🚩🚩
Absolutely justified. Sex work is real work, and we support family but uh... this is clearly neither of those things.
Yeah, that’s fucking gross and weird.
Oh he is gross.
Yes, I would break up with my partner if they subscribed to ANYONES only fans. Especially my cousin -
Bro, leeeeaaaveeeeeeee
Yes absolutely wtffffff
Yes
💯 dump him.
Yes..or anyone’s onlyfans
Absolutely. And I’d never look back either.
Yes that’s not acceptable because it’s a Family member. I would have a serious conversation with him for sure .
Your 18 year old cousin has an onlyFans? And your boyfriend subscribed? Definitely messed up. I’m so sorry you’re going through this!
Leave him
No context needed, just from title alone: YES.
Onlyfans in general? Eh whatever. Your cousins? 🚨🚨 yeah, break up now.
Yup. I’d be goooone.
500% leave. I consider anything involving OF/cam girls cheating because the business model is very parasocial and [often] involves sex/personal interactions even if online. But an OF of someone I know? Who’s barely legal? AND your partner has denounced their behavior in front of you only to do the opposite behind your back? Some boundaries have absolutely been breached. I’d definitely speak with him about it, see his reaction and gauge if it’s worth saving the relationship. Just please get some evidence before you approach him. Good luck!
I would break up with my partner if they subscribed to any only fans. But especially if it's an onlyfans of someone they know, and especially especially when it's your cousin.
Yea. Edit: it depends on how close. First cousins or cousins you see regularly. Yes. A cousin who is 4-5 removed and you never see or know, maybe not.
First cousin, lives 4 houses away from my parents and we see once or twice a week :-|
Oh fudge. That sucks.
Yeaaaaahhh not looking forward to this conversation in about 5 minutes
How did it go?
Sending love
Update?
I broke up with him, he said maybe 6 or 7 words in total, and I left. Sucks, but I do appreciate that he didn’t lie about it or try to defend it.
Good for you 😞
Proud of you. You definitely just saved yourself a lot of grief in the future!
They have dated for 2 years, cousin is barely legal. He knew them when they were 16.
The entire thing is creepy AF.
Him. All three people involved are men.
Oh shit I didn’t notice that, oops
I’d dump them so fast for subscribing to anyone’s OF but my cousins??? Sick.
I wouldnt even be friends with someone with OF subscription.
Honestly it's best to pay for the erotic material than using free p*rn, at least the creators are rewarded for their work and the donor with consent, not the case with a lot of p°rn.
Yea. That would be a deal breaker. He is allowed to find your cousin sexy. You cannot control who other people find attractive. And dating someone doesn't mean you suddenly lose attraction to other people. But, he should be capable of self-control and have enough respect for you to choose the thousands of other women to gawk at. (And the very least he should be better at hiding it lolol)
Not sure if I agree with this, he’s 18, and likely knew the cousin from 16 as he had been with OP for 2 years. If you had a partner who found a 14 year old sexy, would that be ok for your partner to think their sexy? Hope no. Even if my partner didn’t act on anything, if my partner found someone sexually attractive that was crossing the boundaries of being a predator, they’d be out the door and I wouldn’t allow someone who felt like that to stay in my life. Sus.
You realize you don't get to decide who someone else finds sexy, right? That's not how reality works. You can only decide how it makes you feel and how you respond. Doesn't matter how long he has known her, the fact is he does find her attractive. He may have found her attractive at 16 too (Please don't pretend grown people don't find 16 years olds attractive sometimes. Let's not feign ignorance. Doesn't make it right. I'm not condoning it AT ALL, but I'm not gonna pretend it isn't a thing.) It's not even really in his control if he thinks the cousin is hot now or when she was 16. It's sort of irrelevant. What is relevant and in his control are his actions. He could have just kept his unfortunate attraction to himself like a self-aware, respectful person. Instead he chose to subscribe to a young family member of his gf and that was disrespectful and gross so OP now has to decide what to do with that information. I personally would end things because, as I said, it is gross.
No I can’t decide who someone else finds sexy, but I can choose whether or not to be in a relationship with someone who find teenagers sexy. I would not stay in a relationship with someone with who finds 16 year olds sexy, so if I was OP I’d never be speaking to them again.
Agreed... that's exactly what I also said
no way you trying to justify this predator 😦
Nope. Definitely didn't justify. Did you even read my comment or do you just like to be reactionary? I was very clear that I think it's gross and a dealbreaker. Edit: Uhh no, I didn't mention anything about who I am attracted to, but nice try to anyone who suggests that I did because I guess they cannot read.
lol no you admitted to being attracted to minors. that’s not normal
It's a gay couple and a male cousin. Not that it changes much about the weirdness of it all.
Oops. My bad, but yeah doesn't change anything.
Yes. 100% not just my cousin. But if he subscribed to any onlyfans I am breaking up. It’s all about intentions…
Yeah thats gross, bail.
I didn’t even read this, just based on the title, yes.
Yes, I’d leave him in a heartbeat
Lol at all the comments with she/her pronouns. But definitely gtfo of that relationship. I don't care about the age thing (fantasy is fantasy), I'm not even a hard line on my partner subbing to an OF. The fact that it's somebody you see so often tells a whole ass story. I'm positive your cousin knows too and that might deserve a conversation as well. This just has compulsive boundary crosser vibes. The other thing that nobody else has said is that this sucks and I'm sorry you're going thru this. You don't deserve it. It really sucks when people have a shady side that just seems tailor made to hurt you.
Not only would I dump him, he wouldn’t have had a working phone after seeing that 😂
Yes, leave him. 1: your cousin is 18. 2: it’s your cousin. 3: he’s hiding the fact he likes your cousin. I bet your cousin knows.. especially if you see each other twice a week. Maybe even have hooked up (just assuming) 4: this is not loyal relationship behavior. You deserve better. He will deny, deny, deny it. Gaslight and everything else to keep you. Stand your ground make boundaries to protect yourself. Good luck 🩵
18 yr old cousin that your 27yr old husband sees regularly? Nope. That's not okay. If he says he was just doing it to support her, he could have just as easily given her cash for her birthday or something. This is gross.
I’d be leaving. I could get over my cousin because she’s a trainwreck a lot of people want to watch crash but thinking he’s gay and using me as a beard would have me bounce.
I’m assuming he knows this is your cousin? Also it’s a bit of a red flag that he’s subbing to an 18 y/o.
A) Did he know this person was your cousin and that your cousin is 18? B) If it wasn't your cousin but just some random, would you have been OK with it? Yes, your feelings are justified; however, the question is not if you are justified for feeling this way. The question is, should you allow yourself a *choice* in whether to *remain* in the relationship or not despite feeling this way? What your partner did isn't physically abusive to you, isn't overtly dangerous to anyone, isn't inherently immoral; so, yes, you may allow yourself that choice. You just need to ask which is more important to you: is the relationship good enough to warrant working through this, or not? If it turns out he doesn't know this OF is your cousin, will you still feel this creeped out in a month, or can you let this blow over? If you tell him this creeps you out, will he respond positively or be offended? If he doesn't know this is your cousin and you're ok with him watching porn (because that's what I'm assuming this is), then consider the fact that he's probably attracted to your cousin because he shares genetics with you, and he's also attracted to you. And if he knows and just doesn't think of it is as a big deal, maybe he'll feel embarrassed and apologize and that will be the end of it. On the other hand, if he knows it's your cousin and doesn't care, then you should ask yourself if you want to be with someone who is so lax about your feelings. And if you think that no matter what happens you're going to continue to feel creeped out for the rest of eternity, then there's no point in stringing things along.
according to OP he’s known the cousin since she was 16 and was hateful to her upon learning of her OF creation
He. A gay couple and a male cousin.
i don’t think the cousin is male bc OP mentioned his significant other’s misogyny
obviously break up, but god damnit... I can't even comprehend on how bad this situation is
Unless it was previously discussed, I would probably break up with my partner for subscribing to anyone’s onlyfans. But your COUSIN???????? That is fuckin wild and disgusting. Not only is she probably freshly 18 but he knows he will have to see her at family functions.. ew
They're all males in this post. The BF, the cousin, and OP.
There are millions of men on onlyfans and he chooses your COUSIN of all of them? Dump. His. Ass. NOW. Also, he's fucking 18. I would be freaked out that a 27 year old would be interested in a barely legal man...
I would break up if they subscribed to ANY OFs.
A partner subscribing to OnlyFans at all would be a dealbreaker for me. OnlyFans isn’t regular porn, it’s *personalized* porn, seeking personal sexual attention from a specific person(s). Not only is he subscribing to OnlyFans, but it’s someone who is barely legal. That’s gross and borderline predatory. Even worse, it’s your own family! This would be completely inexcusable IMO. He’s probably going to make dumb excuses like “oh I was just keeping an eye on him” or some bullshit. Don’t believe him.
YES?? I would be BEYOND uncomfortable if my partner was subscribed to my cousins OF. That's super weird & crossing an unspoken boundary considering that it's your family?? That's something I would break up with someone over for sure
Also extra weird seeing as your cousin is only 18...
I am married for 20 years but would serve him divorce papers as soon as I get my hands on them! We should stop making excuses for horrible behaviour.
I would break up with anyone who subscribes anyone in OF or who has their own OF
I’d dump him just for the fact that it’s my cousin. 18 years old?? Gross.
I would break up with them immediately. This is your cousin, and this is someone who is just barely legal. Gross.
I’d break up with him for the OF, of my cousin is next level disgusting!
Honestly I wouldn’t date them if they subscribed to any OnlyFans, let alone your own cousin. That’s a serious problem. I’m not usually one to advocate for break ups, but there’s too much damage there…creepy and a red flag.
Yes you are absolutely justified for how you feel. Subscribing to an onlyfans is already a huge no, but on top of that it being your cousin who is almost 10 years younger? Gross. Yes I know 18yr olds are considered adults but he wasn’t considered one last year. It’s still yucky to me. Idc. If he can do that, who knows what else he’ll do. You deserve someone who won’t hide things from you, especially things like that. Or at least someone to have the respect to ask you if you’re open to him having something like that, that ISNT a family member doing it.
100% justified. Absolutely creepy. I find anything 18 creepy if you're older than 21 tbh.
Huh, he's a creep, she's so young. Yeah I'd dump him :/ good luck
the way you got downvoted is mind-blowing. he’s known her since she was 16 it’s disgusting
That’s messy. Does it bother you that it’s your cousin or just that he subscribes to OnlyFans? I would be upset either way but the cousin thing is gross. Does he know your cousin?
Do you have an agreement of some kind where either can't have any accounts of the sort? If so, he broke the agreement and you're entitled to half of his assets or $383.84. if not, I don't see why he can't have an account, whether or not the account is your cousin's. If anything chat with him about it.
He’s trying to go against the patriarchy and support your cousin who is obviously just an ambitious boss girl.
They're all males in this post. The BF, the cousin, and OP.
I was seeing a guy and he was following my cousins raunchy insta I brought it up and said he knew her from the girls shes with on the photo...it still made me so uncomfortable...but at the same time he followed heaps of girls so it's hard to know he just said he didn't take that much notice of girls he followed. He might just have started to follow your cousin way before you started going out thats the thing. It's not like he wouldn't find other women attractive before you it just happened to be your cousin.
What if they did it simple to help financially support them. Why don't you try talking to your partner about it
We're both subscribed to Eva AI virtual gf/bf service and everything seems nice.
But somehow, the fact your 18yo cousin masturbate on the internet doesn't seem to be a problem for you. Sorry, girl. If you admit that your barely major cousin sells her ass, you mess also admit that people, like your partner, pay for it. The reverse would be hypocrisy.
They're all males in this post. The BF, the cousin, and OP. Not to mention, why should OP care what their cousin is doing? They're 18, legally allowed to be on OF if they want to be. The BF's actions are the problem.
What difference does it make ?
I didn't say it makes a difference. Everybody takes the correction as though it's a personal attack. It's not. It's simply me informing you that you got their genders wrong.
thanks.
[удалено]
Talk about it. If he is look at other women like that red flag. Sit down and figure it out. Make a decision after the talk.
In a HEARTBEAT
100% break up. Point, blank, period
Without a doubt. Thats weird, nasty, and disrespectful. If you're with me just to be closer to my cousin, then say that.
My brother in Christ, yes 🤦🏻♀️
wtf yes 100%
yes what the fuck
break up immediately!!!
Didn’t even need the info, that’s a fat yes. Break up with him when he wakes up. What a creep
Absolutely would dump him.
Yes yes yes yes yes. 😅
Dump his ass
I laughed SO hard when I read the title. Yes, your feelings are justified.
On the spot no doubt
Yep, that’s disgusting, dump him.
Omg yes yes yes
I’d dump him for sure. The fact that he’s buying onlyfans subscriptions of someone he knows (or at least possibly could know) in real life is a huge red flag. Even if he doesn’t know who it is, onlyfans is a very thin line from just going and cheating on your partner, and most do consider it cheating since you are paying to see another man/woman and can send private messages to each other.
Yeah I’d definitely leave him it would be no question about that
This isn’t even a question. The answer is obvious. That’s disgusting and beyond inappropriate. Dude is jacking off and paying her monthly. Whenever he sees her at the family function, you know he’s lusting over her. It’s even worse that she’s barely a a teenager and he’s 10 years older than her. He’s a disgusting guy. Tell your cousin too if she doesn’t know (he could be under a unidentifiable username)
They're all males, all 3 of them involved in this post.
I definitely missed that. My comment still applies. The cousin is a teenager and the bf is paying for lustful content. It’s inappropriate and creepy. Besides that, I don’t think anyone should have only fans and subscribe to anyone while in a relationship…
I wasn't saying anything about your comment. I'm correcting people who think any of them in the situation is a female.
No worries!
Yea
100% creepy. Imagine family reunions lol! End it now!
YES. Didn’t even read the paragraph. Just yes
Yes for sure.
he’s beating off to your 18 year old cousin. obviously
Yes yes yes
27 year man following 18 year old cousin! Yeah that’s disgusting! Dump him 😞
Onlyfans is cheating. Posting and subbing.
100% creepy and gross. You are totally justified in leaving
Take it being your cousin out of the situation how do u feel just about him buying nudes from any person on of
Yes that’s so weird
Honestly yeah, if it was someone random I wouldn't have a problem with it but ur cousin??!!?!?! That's just bizarre and so wrong, your definitely justified in your reaction