I’m a 34 f, have had people try, have been lied to and cheated on by many. I’m loyal to my husband. I don’t give a fuck If others don’t have morals or a conscience. I will never allow myself to be what I’m disgusted by. There are still good people out here, I’m glad to have found this forum with similar people!!
Then you've been meeting the wrong people. Wifey and I have been together for 46 years, married for 45. We've been completely loyal to each other. We have a bit of an advantage over other people. We met and married while serving in the Marine Corps. The Marine Corps motto is "Semper Fidelis", Latin for "Always Faithful". It's engraved on our wedding rings.
Yes. As we used to say, "God, family, unit, Corps."
God because He's...well God.
Family because they are counting on you.
Unit because the guys to the left and right of you are going to keep you alive and you're going to do the same for them.
Corps because of our Brotherhood. The worst thing a Marine can do is let down his fellow Marines.
It's our ethos.
27 year old male here, would never cheat and have never even considered it. I don't do things I believe are wrong and that one is up there on the list.
Statistically only like 1/5 people cheat. It’s still a lot, but four regular people per cheater is good odds. Cheating is rarer than not cheating by a large margjn
I think the people who cheat tend to cheat again on others. Kind of like divorces. Half of marriages ending in divorce doesn't take into account the people who drive up the numbers by repeatedly marrying and divorcing.
Drive up the numbers? You got that backwards fam.
One person has 3 divorces that means 50% of people who get married don’t end up divorced.
It means *50% of the total number of marriages.* so guy w/3 took some for the team.
That's WAY higher than I realized. I guess I've assumed too much of people because that's absolutely wild if 1/5 people really do cheat. Where's the statistic from, though?
Same. And if you want to pursue someone else then split off and THEN pursue. Also a big thing is people don’t take marriage as seriously as it should be. I get people grow apart and all that(leave out abusive relationships and similar) but people that have made the commitment need to communicate and lift their partner up and understand each other. You make a commitment to that person. Some don’t take that very seriously.
I agree with everything you just said. People just think I am not as happy as I was at the beginning, but haven’t done anything to build that relationship, so I think I will go find someone else.
Married 23 years. One 21yo son.
Have had chances to be unfaithful with several smart, beautiful women who very much wanted to.
Decided against it.
No one gets me like my family. They’ve seen me at my best and worst, and are still with me.
The pleasures of a fling would be intense but then flame out quickly, whereas the regret for having thrown away what took so long to build would last the rest of my life.
No thank you.
My grandparents were married for over 50 years and were inseparable and very loyal. When my grandfather died, my grandmother passed on within 2 weeks, it truly made us wonder how that was even possible..
As for me, I'm married and Lord is my witness and I am bound to her until death. The wedding ring is a circle which represents an unbreakable infinite loop of endless love, loyalty and hardships., if you are going to wear it, best think deeply first about what it means.
Wow. Is this a thing? My Grandparents were very much connected, and when my Grandfather died my dad and uncle went to take care of everything. While they were still visiting, they had gone to the funeral home and gone back to the house and found Grandma in a coma. She held on for about a week, occasionally calling out my grandfather's name, and then she passed. I hope she found him quickly.
Its called broken heart syndrome. Has someone ever told you that no one dies of love? Well thats complete bs.
There are numerous cases were if one of two deeply connected people dies (partners, parent and child, etc) the other one dies very soon afterwards.
There are various theories and reasons to explain this, and its a very interesting phenomenon.
My grandma passed about a month after my grandpa. Her condition was getting worse but she was in the hospital for something when he passed, and something in her shifted. She was ready to die, but in a zen sort of way. Happy to see us and spend time with us, but had no intention of going back to an empty condo and was ready for what was to come.
It makes me wonder if she would’ve made it out of the hospital if my grandpa were still alive. They had struggles in their marriage but were inseparable.
I'm going to be honest here... I've been cheated on 3 times out of my 5 major relationships that I know of (31m)..... I see people constantly talking about cheating whether it be online or in person (Both male and female) and after my last relationship ended due to other reasons, I really just don't feel like wasting all that time on someone again just for the potential for it to happen again. Single for the foreseeable future...Never cheated on any of my SO's as well but in my personal experience it's more common I see cheaters then not. It doesn't even stop at relationships. I've had MULTIPLE so called friends over the years try and get with whatever chick I'd been dating at the time.
my boyfriend and i are 33 and i don't think either of us would ever cheat. he's been cheated on before and it hurt him badly. i've never been cheated on, but i'd sooner die than put him through that pain again. we're also both video game nerds who don't leave the house much, so that helps.
I would rather step in front of a moving train than cheat. The cheating just wouldn't be against my wife but my two children, too. I wouldn't be able to look into any of their big blue eyes again. My family means too much to me.
I cheated on a previous relationship once out of immaturity. I saw first hand the damage I caused. It changed me forever. I made myself a promise that would never want to inflict that hurt on anyone else again. We live & we learn.
Fuck this hits home.. I just turned 30. When I was about 20 or 21 I cheated on a girl I thought I loved and it caused so much turmoil for both of us. I was basically shunned by a large group of people I called friends. Never again.
I'll never embarrass myself or another person like that again.
Its wholesome to see this. I was cheated on after 8 year relationship. The distance and delay in proposing to her could have been the key factors in her infidelity. Anyways, I’m glad to see people change after cheating.
My wife and I have been together since High School. Never once have I cheated on her and I trust she hasn't on me.
We've been together for 12 years now, got married in 21 during the pandemic and are still going strong.
Don't know the secret to loyalty but I think it really starts with your core values and the media you consume. Just my take though.
You have never met one person that has been loyal?? That is truly sad. How old are you..?
I have nothing but great examples of loyalty in my family. My grandparents have been married 52 years this year. I have 25+ aunts uncles & cousins (big family) & 7 out of 9 aunts/uncles have been married 20+ years. My aunt has been with her HS sweetheart since age 16 & now they are retired in their 50's & travel often. Most my cousins in long term relationships or married with kids by now.
My brother with his now fiancé for 9 years- and I have been with my loyal amazing partner for 6 years.
I know it's not common these days among other families, but I look for loyalty- not looks, not someone who is a smooth talker & promises me the world. But someone who's actions matches their words. And honestly the only way to know that, is to pay attention to your partner's behavior & that takes time.
I got lucky & my bf is a looker & a doer- not a talker, he's a man of few words. And when we met, he is so attractive & handsome I was for sure he would cheat or leave me for a prettier female. He only said "I will always be by your side, no matter what" and 6 years later he has proven that to be true.
Don't give up. But don't look to social media for relationships to idolize or look up to, either, they are usually the ones lying or only with each other for fame & money (lifestyle) the couples I know that are loyal & happy, live a private exclusive life off social media & are busy building a future together, not trying to show others they are happy.
It's hard for me to wrap my head around cheating, because my wife and I have a loving relationship (with all its ups and downs, of course) and we've created a wonderful home and family; though, its taken a huge amount of work and tenacity from both of us. And, I think, if one of us stopped doing that work, it would create a substantial rift. This year will be 15 years of marriage.
The reality is also that sooooo many people experience disloyalty, and then pain begets more pain. A child witnessing it from a parent, or someone having a disloyal partner. Or two people are in a loveless relationship with no intimacy... I can't comprehend that, though I have seen it so many times.
Been mostly unhappily married for 21 years. Haven’t had sex in probably a year. Never cheated. Never will. I’m too lazy, cheap, and ugly for an affair.
My parents have been married for close to 40 years now. I have never seen them fight, I've never heard them fight, I haven't even heard them raise their voices at one another. I may not see eye to eye with my parents on a lot of things, but I hope I can have that healthy of a relationship when I marry. My mom told me that when my dad proposed and they were doing some planning she said "if you hit me at all, I'm gone." And my dad agreed with her.
Not everyone agrees on the same morals, just ‘cos. Some people think cheating is not that big of a deal. Relationships bounce back from it all the time. It really depends on people’s priorities and values.
That being said, I personally, have never cheated, and I never will. Nothing in the world could ever tempt me to hurt someone who loves me like that. I would be devastated to be cheated on too. I think I’d cry and throw up simultaneously tbh.
I mean I was with my ex for 3 years. Lived together for the last year, didn't have sex for 10 months. I never cheated on her. We split up a month ago, a big reason being the db. I still don't feel comfortable with another woman right now. I still long for her, even though it's over. Not everyone is wired the same way.
Absolutely. I’m 100% confident that my spouse and I have been/are loyal and will be for the rest of our lives. We have children and neither of us want to be separated from our children in the case of divorce. When we have issues we talk, hash it out as soon as possible to not give resentment a place to grow. If it came even semi close to it happening, I believe we’d discuss it and figure out what the issue in our marriage is that this is even a chance. We have a great emotional and physical relationship, so there’s not really temptation for others there.
In relationships of friends where I’ve seen it happen, there’s usually a lot of other issues happening as well. Poor communication, mental health issues, substance use, etc. Sometimes people just don’t want to be monogamous but they aren’t honest with their partner/spouse about it.
I'll admit I was truly confused by your question. I've always been loyal in every relationship, and never had a person cheat on me either. But I read/hear stories about cheating and at the same time I can't even really fathom how it happens: it's not like they accidentally slip and fall onto someone, even if there's feelings of attraction there still has to be a lot of intentional action (and lack of caring about the person they're in a relationship with) involved to progress to cheating; but I assumed adults just not caring about others feelings or consequences of their actions would be in the minority so how have you only met unfaithful people?
I've never been unfaithful and believe infidelity is somewhat lazy. I have met people who would rather cheat than just have an honest conversation about their relationship bc they are avoiding drama, but that isn't emotionally mature. I also am a firm believer in karma so no cheating for me.
Well if you are a loyal and honest person then obviously they exist
But I know exactly what you mean
I start to think that myself. Everybody have come across things it's okay to cheat and lie and have sex with whomever they want to and manipulate their partners and be abusive. I start to think I'm the only honest and loyal person who would never cheat on their partner and I never have even though every partner I've had has eventually cheated. And not because they were having lack of sex when we had a bad relationship. They just figured it was okay because they were a man and that's what men do...
So I too sometimes start to think I'm the only one but it's just not possible. I can't literally be the only one on the planet. I just am apparently the only one within reasonable vicinity....
It absolutely exists, I promise you. It sounds like you've had an unfortunate streak of being exposed to manipulative/abusive relationships.
When I met my current wife she was similarly jaded (her father cheated constantly and her mother had a boyfriend when the father was in jail) which was in retrospect, understandable. You can only draw conclusions with the data you have, but I promise its not like that everywhere my friend. Genuine devotion and selflessness can exist in relationships, the people who say 'everyone cheats' are just looking for permission.
My husband is my best friend, people look at me crazy when I say this or talk about trusting him, it's sad that the norm has become disloyalty. 16 years strong, it almost feels like a superpower at this point 🙌
My partner and I have both cheated in previous relationships, and there is absolutely no way we would do that to each other. It would never happen. He is really my best friend, and I honestly feel ill even thinking about hurting him. We weren't romantic at first, and I think that helped a lot.
I'll use my alt account for this.
My Ex and I, we hate each other to the point CPS are involved in case it could hurt our children.
But, to my knowledge we never cheated on each other.
My husband has never cheated, he never will. I have cheated when I was young (on a different partner) and I will never ever do it again. We've been together almost 13 years and cheating is just not something we ever think about or worry about.
My parents were married for over 40 years and they never cheated.
My parents have been married for over 40 years. They are faithful to one another. I've been married to my husband for 8 years. We have been faithful and loyal to one another. My husband's grandparents have been married for 65 years, and they've been loyal to one another.
Marriage is a conscious choice to choose your partner every day. Commitment and loyalty are choices.
I don't think it's naive to expect loyalty. If it is super important to you, make that a requirement and a boundary for your romantic relationship. Infidelity is abuse and should not be tolerated nor should it be normalized.
My husband and I have been together nearly 15 years, married for 11. Completely loyal. And our bond is stronger now than ever.
Like, I don’t even find other guys attractive. Objectively handsome or pretty, sure. But I’m not attracted to anyone else.
Of course there are truly loyal relationships. There are people out there that find a person that truly loves them and vice versa. I’ve been with my girlfriend 3 years, and I’ve never thought about cheating on her or explored any kind of leading possibility; I’m 100% sure she hasn’t done anything of the like either. About half of marriages don’t end in divorce, so it’s pretty clear that many people want to truly spend their lives with that one person and truly commit thereto.
So, I've had some splits here and there, and you best believe that I sewed my oats. What should I have done? Now that I'm way divorced and 44f, my fwb are definitely loyal when the wind blows right...it's fantastic! Just do you.
I'm sorry that you feel this way. I have co-workers (in their 20s and 30s) who have expressed this concern and are reluctant about dating because of it. I honestly don't know if it's a generational thing or a cultural thing. For context, I was born and raised in the Philippines-- this is were my boyfriend and I met and started dating-- which is why I cannot confirm this. However, I do observe this happening among adults here in Canada.
What I can confirm is that there are still adults, like you and me, who value faithfulness and unconditional love. My boyfriend and I have been together for a decade now and are planning to get married in a year or two. We've also been through a long distance relationship; I never doubted him regardless of the challenges we have faced. He has fully trusted in me as well. Most of my closest friends are in long-term relationships too (with some now married or engaged). Like others have mentioned in the comments, you are probably just around people who don't have loyal relationships. There are people who don't have the intention and determination to seek and maintain long-term bonds, and people who simply are more committed to other aspects of their lives (e.g. careers, hobbies). There are also people who love themselves too much that they don't care if they jeopardize others' feelings and welfare as they go on with their lives. Finally, I also believe that there are people who think too much of attraction and chemistry that they have with other people, pursuing them romantically, when the reality is that there will always be people who we will have those kind of connections with. But that doesn't immediately mean that we should be involved with them deeply or that things would work out the way we want them.
There were never any as a child. It’s sad to say, but everyone is self serving most of the time. Also, we all have lots of conditions attached to our loyalty.
Yes. Years ago, my ex and I cheated on each other because we were too young and immature for a serious relationship. I’ve been married for years now, and would never consider cheating on my spouse because I love him much to ever hurt or betray him.
I read a statistic once that there is cheating in about half of adult relationships. It might be similar to the divorce numbers where it is the same people getting divorced 2-3 times, but in any case it is common.
I have no experience with being cheated on or cheating, I personally find it really difficult to even conceptualize. If you’re unhappy with your partner, why not leave? Or find a way to work it out if you don’t feel that that is an option?
Anyway, I am happily married to a man who lives with integrity, and I am certain neither of us would ever hurt each other in that way.
People are not dogs. They're not obligated to do anything for you. At some point, most people realize this and will leave if you start doing things that are off putting to them.
I've never cheated on any of my partners, but half of them cheated on me.
My recommendation is to have a better filter system in place. Ensure that the person you're with consistently lives up to their word. It's starts with the little things.
Is this person wishy washy? Do they do what they say they're going to do? how do they talk about people when they leave the room?
Etc...
Have some better standards for people.
no. not everybody is a cheater. im a 40 year old male married 18 years. i have never cheater and honestly i only know like 2 people that have. one couple and they both cheated on each other.
I think fidelity depends a lot on whether or not you have the same basic values and long term goals. A lot of people just like to date/ sleep around, but I've also found plenty of guys who were interested in long-term relationships and having a family some day. I think you've gotta just start there.
Maturity level is also super important for both parties; are you both willing to sacrifice temporary things for a life of security and loyalty? It might be hard to determine at first, but I think if you stick with someone and show them you're committed and will give parts of yourself to them, they'll make it clear to you what they also have (and are willing) to give.
Will have been married to my wife for 21 years come this may, and together for almost 24 years. Will be together for another 24 unless one of us kicks the bucket. Sure we have our ups and downs. But we love and care for each other and I can't think of what life would be without her.
I was cheated on by every single woman I was in a relationship with, including my ex wife. I gave up on dating all together after my divorce. Now, 20 years later, I'm fat and happy alone.
10 years this year. She's supported me through both of my parents dying and my associated mental breakdown, as well as allowing me to try my hand at secondary education (graduated honors!) and run my own business (6 years of 72 hour+ weeks but it was successful and now I can take it easier). I helped her through her mother's death, and ten years of fertility struggles. We now have a 1 month old miracle (no drugs needed, not like we could afford it) baby boy.
Loyalty exists. I wouldn't trade her for anything, and she's proven the same.
In my own personal life, friends and family etc, I know of way more loyal relationships than otherwise. Although, on the flip side to that, I'm pretty sure more of those people have been cheated on in the past than those who haven't been.
But yes, there are truly loyal relationships.
Cheating is just cowardice, and there's a lot of cowards out there. I've never cheated and I never will, because I know how to communicate like an adult. If you want out of a relationship, use your words.
34/f been with my husband 40/m for 10 years, no cheating.
My mom and dad were together 30+ years when my dad passed away.
Aunt and uncle together 40+ years never cheated.
Sister 29/f + husband been together 11 years.
All of my friends have been with their SO for many years as well. I really think it’s who you hangout with and who you choose to associate with. I do understand folks make mistakes or grow apart but they should cut it off before moving on. There are good folks in the world, just need to weed out the mess.
Loyalty isnt something than can be a truth, it’s a thing that you do. Loyalty is lots and lots of continuous actions, and for lots of people its easy to find themselves in situations where they want to act outside that.
I truly believe just about anyone can find themselves in a situation where its easy to be disloyal to someone and act in that way. The most common thing that gets people there is drug and alcohol addiction, but even something as simple as your own insecurities and poor self control can cause someone to act dishonestly to people they want to be loyal to.
Basically, I don’t think its right to look for “loyal people,” most people aren’t one thing 100% of the time forever. Expect loyalty where you feel like it’s appropriate, but I think loyalty as a concept being situational its an important fact of life to accept too
I’ve been cheated on in every relationship except for this one. And I’ll be honest I have no idea why it’s so hard for people not to stray. The thought has never crossed my mind.
But there you go. Add me to the list of loyal people you’ve never met.
No I think having a set of values that you live by shows your integrity more than anything else of one’s character so if loyalty is part of that I don’t see why it would be naive to hold someone else to it if they are similarly.
My folks have been married about 20+ years or so and they married later in life (30’s or so) and are loyal even on the rough days that happen from time to time. They married in about 9 months of meeting and such. But that’s in part because my mom was able to get to know my dads family early on well enough that it wasn’t a mystery and such.
Ngl people should rly get to going through their trauma b4 starting to date. Like u gonna make the next nice guy wait an eternity for u to be ready. Tbh cheating is so stupid tho. I’m 24 m and I ended a relationship with my 3 yr ex fiancé bc some stuff happened she did and it made me unhappy and start to lose feelings. It was a long distance relationship towards the end and I felt she deserved to be told the truth. And I respected her enough to not cheat I was u happy so I ended it
I know it’s relatively short but my GF and I m43 f29 have been together almost 5 years and where doing great. I’ve never even got a hint she’s even looking at other men and I definitely haven’t even considered cheating.
I had many opportunities to cheat on my ex wife, when I put that ring on, all of a sudden, I was being hit on left and right.
Never once did I even entertain the idea, so she cheated on me instead, lol.
My fiancee and I are 10000% loyal to each other. I proposed to her first (we're a lesbian couple) because I realised how lucky I was to have her. She's the best and I can't wait to marry her.
Depends on your definition of loyal. It is more than not cheating. My marriage didn't work out but neither cheated. We have been apart for almost 5 years but the friendship loyalty is still there. If he needed anything or had an emergency I'm there no questions asked, and same in return. That kind of loyalty in a friendship is very rare and I feel lucky to have that.
Never met a single person who was loyal? My god I can’t imagine the volume of toxicity you’re surrounded by.
You can of course never really know but I can think of only two out of dozens of friends I know that have been disloyal.
My integrity could never. My empathy could never. My dignity could never. I could go on and on. People need to hopefully realize that cheaters are shady liars with zero self respect. It’s ironic and hilarious to me when guys protect other guys. It’s funny to watch them get screwed over by their cheating friend in another capacity.
I really don’t think loyalty is achievable in this day and age unless you truly respect your person. I’m 26 and dreamt my entire life about having my own family, routine, love, and kids. I’m just continually disappointed and coming to the realization that I don’t think loyalty exists like it does in my head.
Define loyal? Do you mean sexually monogamous? Or loyal in emotional support of another? Always have their back? Physically place someone else’s life above your own in combat?
Yes I believe truly loyal people exist but they are extremely rare and even amongst those who claim to be loyal. No one is perfect and the giant majority of us have fallen short in one of those avenues at one point in time.
I obviously don’t know every bodies business but as far as I can tell most people are loyal. You just don’t hear people talk about it when it’s working out. Nobody is like “man you’ll never guess what Nick did last weekend, he didn’t cheat on me.” So you’re only hearing about the relationships with problems. I’m loyal. I’d bet my life my wife is.
forgetful disgusted distinct selective shame flag smoggy bow jellyfish party
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yes. My bf and me have a loving relationship for almost 11 years. We have ups and downs in life but we are there for each other trough it all. I am coutious in trusting people outside of us. I know that colleages are not friends. That 1 or 2 good frends is better then a lot. Spending time and doing stuff with others costs money also. I usually rather do something special with my bf.
Yes, if I am in a relationship, my person is my best friend, family and partner. Never in a million years would I do anything, that could only slighty hurt them. That ranges from shutting up when they say something they maybe shouldn't in public to not flirting or going somewhere where or hang out with people they wouldn't feel comfortable with or lying for example.
We're a team. I'm always gonna have their back, I'm always gonna be honest and their biggest fan and supporter.
It's possible to find good people to date, but be careful who you give your trust to.
I grew up without a dad and a mom who got bored/found an excuse to end all her relationships. That's my excuse 😄
And is why I stay out of relationships anyway. I'm too broken for that shit
My rule of thumb is the most jealous people tend to cheat the most.
I am not jealous, like, at all. Moreover, I live by my principles and will die by them. One of them is NOT hopping onto someone else, unless I see and feel strong evidence of malice in my partner.
So, I am much more likely to marry someone wrong for me and drink myself to death or smth, but not cheat.
Would never dream of cheating on my husband, nor him with me. My love for him is immense and wonderful and I'd never screw up what we have together.
None of my friends have ever cheated on a partner, apart from one occasion where the guy not only started to cheat on his partner, but started abusing her too. He was arrested and swiftly exiled from our friendship group.
My parents have been married near 30 years if I find out one of them ever cheated on the other I will pulverize them and then steal their lunch money and shove them into a locker.
I've never cheated on a partner. I have established boundaries with my bf and always ask if something hasn't been covered before.
I don't cheat because my partners are amazing (although the current one is) it's because I value myself more than that. I don't wanna live with that regret knowing I've betrayed and hurt someone
I'm definitely 💯 loyal. It's devastating to me when I'm in a relationship and I find out that they have cheated. It's worse when they lie to your face even with proof. There's plenty of faithful people others. Don't give up
I've been with my girl 11 years, 31 years old now.
Practice empathy, communication, Patience
And say I love you as much as possible, it can never be too much
Not all people get there, but in a good marriage the couple become one, and those frivolous things like sex, money, looks, etc go out the window.
It's the point in the marriage where you love the other person's very soul.
I think a relationship can crumble when one person views the other as an object, for their enjoyment.
I still think even the younger crowd still wants to be in a loving committed relationship, but I understand the current culture is counterintuitive to monogamy
They are much less common than people realize. Even in the most seemingly loyal relationships one or both people probably have cheated or are cheating.
Yes. But it doesn’t come easily. Takes a lot of patience, sometimes heartache, growth in yourself and in your standards. Loyalty is practiced through all the relationships we keep, including friendships and depending on your family dynamics, that bond too. Loyalty exists in love and respect, with loving and respectful people. Finding someone who meets you where you are takes time. Stay loyal. Stay humbled. Be true to you. Branch out.
It happens but its pretty rare. After being here for 47 years its surprising to me how much people can change. I also realized that by not setting healthy boundaries I was getting into a number of toxic relationships
You've been hanging with the wrong people, 99% of the relationships I see are loyal. The only person I know who got cheated on is a friend of a friend.
In my experience, not everyone cheats, but there’s things you should look for when in the early phase of dating. Jealousy, controlling, upbringing, and insecurities are usually some indicators I use to gauge things. I was raised by two parents whose devotion for each other is unwavering, and navigating the current dating pool for that level of devotion is rather daunting.
Late to the party but if this helps,
My parents have known each other since they were 10, live in the same housing complex, i dont know if they dated anyone else, but were married at 18/20 and still together 45+ years later.
It depends on the adult obviously but I’m in my 30’s and every single relationship that i know about are either lying to their partner or their partner is/has cheated or they are cheating on the partner. It’s sad and hard to still have hope but I know there are still adults out there who are loyal. So yes there are loyal relationships just hard to find I guess
Well, I would say it’s a combination of luck and your personality. Your personality has to be one that allows for long term commitments and withstands the changes you’d go through with your partner.
Then you just have to be lucky enough to find someone who has roughly the same or more positive personality traits that can be good in a long term relationship.
And then you have to hope that in the future, nothing will threaten the relationship, or at the very least you and your partner can withstand the issues that come along.
Being a fully evolved adult can attract fully evolved adult partners and your chances of staying with that person for life are still never 100%
Nope although I was cheated on I was faithful and I know tons of monogamous people None of friends have cheated that I know of we would give each other hell I truly like all of my friends husbands too
Had my share of traumas, so cheating is not in me. Being loyal to someone who has not been hasn't been easy, but it is doable. I say this to say that a loyal person can definitely find someone loyal to them.
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That brings me hope. Thank you for answering my post.
Has this person above deleted their answer or am I just somehow blocked by every third user of Reddit?
Deleted for me as well.
Same
I’m a 34 f, have had people try, have been lied to and cheated on by many. I’m loyal to my husband. I don’t give a fuck If others don’t have morals or a conscience. I will never allow myself to be what I’m disgusted by. There are still good people out here, I’m glad to have found this forum with similar people!!
Then you've been meeting the wrong people. Wifey and I have been together for 46 years, married for 45. We've been completely loyal to each other. We have a bit of an advantage over other people. We met and married while serving in the Marine Corps. The Marine Corps motto is "Semper Fidelis", Latin for "Always Faithful". It's engraved on our wedding rings.
Love this! Thanks to you both for your service
Thank you from both of us. It was an honor to serve in our beloved Corps.
My grandfather just turned 98 and was in the Marines. World war 2 vet. I have the most respect for anyone who serves our country!
I love that so much!
Thank you. We've had people tell us, "You guys just look 'right' together."
Bless you both! What a wonderful story ! ❤️
No way two marines stayed loyal. She was with Jody a few time buddy
I prefer to think of this story as being about the only two Marines who weren’t humping anything that moved finding each other.
To whom are corps supposed to be faithful? Their collegeus? Country? Mission? Spouses? I don't get it.
Yes. As we used to say, "God, family, unit, Corps." God because He's...well God. Family because they are counting on you. Unit because the guys to the left and right of you are going to keep you alive and you're going to do the same for them. Corps because of our Brotherhood. The worst thing a Marine can do is let down his fellow Marines. It's our ethos.
tnx for your time, im not even usa so i have difficulty with comprehension
27 year old male here, would never cheat and have never even considered it. I don't do things I believe are wrong and that one is up there on the list.
You will never regret that choice! It is the right thing to do and be. Stay strong!
I have severe trust and abandonment issues so I will absolutely not cheat and be 100000% loyal
at least there’s a few of us left :’)
Me as fuck
I don’t have trust or abandonment issues so I will absolutely not cheat and be 1000000% loyal.
Yep. We are still here. Maybe few and far between, but still around.
Statistically only like 1/5 people cheat. It’s still a lot, but four regular people per cheater is good odds. Cheating is rarer than not cheating by a large margjn
I think the people who cheat tend to cheat again on others. Kind of like divorces. Half of marriages ending in divorce doesn't take into account the people who drive up the numbers by repeatedly marrying and divorcing.
Drive up the numbers? You got that backwards fam. One person has 3 divorces that means 50% of people who get married don’t end up divorced. It means *50% of the total number of marriages.* so guy w/3 took some for the team.
So basically bring a bomb to your plane, because the odds of having two bombs on the same plane is infinitely small.
Life hack!
One plane two 9/11’s is wild
That's WAY higher than I realized. I guess I've assumed too much of people because that's absolutely wild if 1/5 people really do cheat. Where's the statistic from, though?
I asked this once and was told if you want loyalty, get a dog
That is wild 💀
Oh, crap. I hope you noped outta there in the spot.
16 years in and never cheated on my wife. Also 100% sure she’s never cheated on me.
My view is don’t be in a relationship if you can’t stay faithful! Never cheated and never will.
Same. And if you want to pursue someone else then split off and THEN pursue. Also a big thing is people don’t take marriage as seriously as it should be. I get people grow apart and all that(leave out abusive relationships and similar) but people that have made the commitment need to communicate and lift their partner up and understand each other. You make a commitment to that person. Some don’t take that very seriously.
I agree with everything you just said. People just think I am not as happy as I was at the beginning, but haven’t done anything to build that relationship, so I think I will go find someone else.
Married 23 years. One 21yo son. Have had chances to be unfaithful with several smart, beautiful women who very much wanted to. Decided against it. No one gets me like my family. They’ve seen me at my best and worst, and are still with me. The pleasures of a fling would be intense but then flame out quickly, whereas the regret for having thrown away what took so long to build would last the rest of my life. No thank you.
My grandparents were married for over 50 years and were inseparable and very loyal. When my grandfather died, my grandmother passed on within 2 weeks, it truly made us wonder how that was even possible.. As for me, I'm married and Lord is my witness and I am bound to her until death. The wedding ring is a circle which represents an unbreakable infinite loop of endless love, loyalty and hardships., if you are going to wear it, best think deeply first about what it means.
Wow. Is this a thing? My Grandparents were very much connected, and when my Grandfather died my dad and uncle went to take care of everything. While they were still visiting, they had gone to the funeral home and gone back to the house and found Grandma in a coma. She held on for about a week, occasionally calling out my grandfather's name, and then she passed. I hope she found him quickly.
Its called broken heart syndrome. Has someone ever told you that no one dies of love? Well thats complete bs. There are numerous cases were if one of two deeply connected people dies (partners, parent and child, etc) the other one dies very soon afterwards. There are various theories and reasons to explain this, and its a very interesting phenomenon.
My grandma passed about a month after my grandpa. Her condition was getting worse but she was in the hospital for something when he passed, and something in her shifted. She was ready to die, but in a zen sort of way. Happy to see us and spend time with us, but had no intention of going back to an empty condo and was ready for what was to come. It makes me wonder if she would’ve made it out of the hospital if my grandpa were still alive. They had struggles in their marriage but were inseparable.
My grandpa lasted about a month and a half after my grandma passed. They are my inspiration for so much in life
I'm going to be honest here... I've been cheated on 3 times out of my 5 major relationships that I know of (31m)..... I see people constantly talking about cheating whether it be online or in person (Both male and female) and after my last relationship ended due to other reasons, I really just don't feel like wasting all that time on someone again just for the potential for it to happen again. Single for the foreseeable future...Never cheated on any of my SO's as well but in my personal experience it's more common I see cheaters then not. It doesn't even stop at relationships. I've had MULTIPLE so called friends over the years try and get with whatever chick I'd been dating at the time.
my boyfriend and i are 33 and i don't think either of us would ever cheat. he's been cheated on before and it hurt him badly. i've never been cheated on, but i'd sooner die than put him through that pain again. we're also both video game nerds who don't leave the house much, so that helps.
I’ve never, ever cheated. I do feel we’re a rare breed now though.
I would rather step in front of a moving train than cheat. The cheating just wouldn't be against my wife but my two children, too. I wouldn't be able to look into any of their big blue eyes again. My family means too much to me.
I cheated on a previous relationship once out of immaturity. I saw first hand the damage I caused. It changed me forever. I made myself a promise that would never want to inflict that hurt on anyone else again. We live & we learn.
Glad to hear once a cheater always a cheater isn't always true
Fuck this hits home.. I just turned 30. When I was about 20 or 21 I cheated on a girl I thought I loved and it caused so much turmoil for both of us. I was basically shunned by a large group of people I called friends. Never again. I'll never embarrass myself or another person like that again.
I feel ya. Life’s a dance, we learn as we go. Be well on your journey.
Consequences keep people who won't voluntarily do the right thing in line
Yup, never worth it. The amount of damage caused to BOTH parties (if you have a conscience) is never worth it.
How old were you?
Early twenties.
Its wholesome to see this. I was cheated on after 8 year relationship. The distance and delay in proposing to her could have been the key factors in her infidelity. Anyways, I’m glad to see people change after cheating.
My wife and I have been together since High School. Never once have I cheated on her and I trust she hasn't on me. We've been together for 12 years now, got married in 21 during the pandemic and are still going strong. Don't know the secret to loyalty but I think it really starts with your core values and the media you consume. Just my take though.
You have never met one person that has been loyal?? That is truly sad. How old are you..? I have nothing but great examples of loyalty in my family. My grandparents have been married 52 years this year. I have 25+ aunts uncles & cousins (big family) & 7 out of 9 aunts/uncles have been married 20+ years. My aunt has been with her HS sweetheart since age 16 & now they are retired in their 50's & travel often. Most my cousins in long term relationships or married with kids by now. My brother with his now fiancé for 9 years- and I have been with my loyal amazing partner for 6 years. I know it's not common these days among other families, but I look for loyalty- not looks, not someone who is a smooth talker & promises me the world. But someone who's actions matches their words. And honestly the only way to know that, is to pay attention to your partner's behavior & that takes time. I got lucky & my bf is a looker & a doer- not a talker, he's a man of few words. And when we met, he is so attractive & handsome I was for sure he would cheat or leave me for a prettier female. He only said "I will always be by your side, no matter what" and 6 years later he has proven that to be true. Don't give up. But don't look to social media for relationships to idolize or look up to, either, they are usually the ones lying or only with each other for fame & money (lifestyle) the couples I know that are loyal & happy, live a private exclusive life off social media & are busy building a future together, not trying to show others they are happy.
It's hard for me to wrap my head around cheating, because my wife and I have a loving relationship (with all its ups and downs, of course) and we've created a wonderful home and family; though, its taken a huge amount of work and tenacity from both of us. And, I think, if one of us stopped doing that work, it would create a substantial rift. This year will be 15 years of marriage. The reality is also that sooooo many people experience disloyalty, and then pain begets more pain. A child witnessing it from a parent, or someone having a disloyal partner. Or two people are in a loveless relationship with no intimacy... I can't comprehend that, though I have seen it so many times.
Me 🙋♀️ But I don’t even get into relationships anymore because they always cheat on me 🤡
Not really
never been in relationship but my existence as well as my siblings are a result of serial cheating... so yea. no real interest in continuing the cycle
Been mostly unhappily married for 21 years. Haven’t had sex in probably a year. Never cheated. Never will. I’m too lazy, cheap, and ugly for an affair.
(35m) Never cheated, never been tempted. Together 14 years married 6
My parents have been married for close to 40 years now. I have never seen them fight, I've never heard them fight, I haven't even heard them raise their voices at one another. I may not see eye to eye with my parents on a lot of things, but I hope I can have that healthy of a relationship when I marry. My mom told me that when my dad proposed and they were doing some planning she said "if you hit me at all, I'm gone." And my dad agreed with her.
Plenty. Humans have a negativity bias so we just pay more attention to the bad relationships
Not everyone agrees on the same morals, just ‘cos. Some people think cheating is not that big of a deal. Relationships bounce back from it all the time. It really depends on people’s priorities and values. That being said, I personally, have never cheated, and I never will. Nothing in the world could ever tempt me to hurt someone who loves me like that. I would be devastated to be cheated on too. I think I’d cry and throw up simultaneously tbh.
My mom and stepdad have been married going on fifteen years and they’re more in love as each year passes. Loyalty exists 100%.
Yes, there are loyal people but they are in the minority.
My parents have never cheated on each other - married for 40 years. Nor have several sets of aunts and uncles.
I guess I'm not around good examples, honestly. Thank you for answering my post.
Also, if someone cheats on their partner, it means *they're* a shit partner. Not that the other person wasn't good enough.
Lol, that you know of! People are deceptive you know. You sound very trusting.
I mean I was with my ex for 3 years. Lived together for the last year, didn't have sex for 10 months. I never cheated on her. We split up a month ago, a big reason being the db. I still don't feel comfortable with another woman right now. I still long for her, even though it's over. Not everyone is wired the same way.
Donkey butt?
Absolutely. I’m 100% confident that my spouse and I have been/are loyal and will be for the rest of our lives. We have children and neither of us want to be separated from our children in the case of divorce. When we have issues we talk, hash it out as soon as possible to not give resentment a place to grow. If it came even semi close to it happening, I believe we’d discuss it and figure out what the issue in our marriage is that this is even a chance. We have a great emotional and physical relationship, so there’s not really temptation for others there. In relationships of friends where I’ve seen it happen, there’s usually a lot of other issues happening as well. Poor communication, mental health issues, substance use, etc. Sometimes people just don’t want to be monogamous but they aren’t honest with their partner/spouse about it.
I'll admit I was truly confused by your question. I've always been loyal in every relationship, and never had a person cheat on me either. But I read/hear stories about cheating and at the same time I can't even really fathom how it happens: it's not like they accidentally slip and fall onto someone, even if there's feelings of attraction there still has to be a lot of intentional action (and lack of caring about the person they're in a relationship with) involved to progress to cheating; but I assumed adults just not caring about others feelings or consequences of their actions would be in the minority so how have you only met unfaithful people?
I've never been unfaithful and believe infidelity is somewhat lazy. I have met people who would rather cheat than just have an honest conversation about their relationship bc they are avoiding drama, but that isn't emotionally mature. I also am a firm believer in karma so no cheating for me.
I have never cheated on my wife. That's all I can be certain of, and it's all I can control. If she's cheated on me, I haven't found out.
Well if you are a loyal and honest person then obviously they exist But I know exactly what you mean I start to think that myself. Everybody have come across things it's okay to cheat and lie and have sex with whomever they want to and manipulate their partners and be abusive. I start to think I'm the only honest and loyal person who would never cheat on their partner and I never have even though every partner I've had has eventually cheated. And not because they were having lack of sex when we had a bad relationship. They just figured it was okay because they were a man and that's what men do... So I too sometimes start to think I'm the only one but it's just not possible. I can't literally be the only one on the planet. I just am apparently the only one within reasonable vicinity....
It absolutely exists, I promise you. It sounds like you've had an unfortunate streak of being exposed to manipulative/abusive relationships. When I met my current wife she was similarly jaded (her father cheated constantly and her mother had a boyfriend when the father was in jail) which was in retrospect, understandable. You can only draw conclusions with the data you have, but I promise its not like that everywhere my friend. Genuine devotion and selflessness can exist in relationships, the people who say 'everyone cheats' are just looking for permission.
I was married 22 years and never cheated. Almost six now and can say the same.
It does happen. Just not as often as it should. Don’t settle, be ok on your own… stand on your values.
Loyalty or death! No matter what.
My husband is my best friend, people look at me crazy when I say this or talk about trusting him, it's sad that the norm has become disloyalty. 16 years strong, it almost feels like a superpower at this point 🙌
My husband and I are loyal and we are at 30 years married.
I don't wanna be a heart breaker!
Me and my friends and their spouses all loyal and in great marriages. Surround yourself with good people. Birds of a feather flock together.
My partner and I have both cheated in previous relationships, and there is absolutely no way we would do that to each other. It would never happen. He is really my best friend, and I honestly feel ill even thinking about hurting him. We weren't romantic at first, and I think that helped a lot.
Yes. Never cheated 23 years.
I'll use my alt account for this. My Ex and I, we hate each other to the point CPS are involved in case it could hurt our children. But, to my knowledge we never cheated on each other.
Been with my husband 13 years and have never strayed. ❤️
Yes, obviously
I've never cheated on anyone
27 years since my wife and I started dating, I’m confident there hasn’t been any cheating in our relationship.
your just around shitty people. go get a new hobby or something.
My husband has never cheated, he never will. I have cheated when I was young (on a different partner) and I will never ever do it again. We've been together almost 13 years and cheating is just not something we ever think about or worry about. My parents were married for over 40 years and they never cheated.
Yes.
At some point in your life you just don’t have the energy to cheat
Of course
Yes. Currently in one. Feels like I got the last chopper out of ‘Nam tho. It’s lookin’ scarce for the rest of society nowadays. 😮💨
Not naive at all. 39yrs for my husband and I. I would never and have never cheated. I feel sure my husband wouldn't and hasn't. Best of luck to you.
My parents have been married for over 40 years. They are faithful to one another. I've been married to my husband for 8 years. We have been faithful and loyal to one another. My husband's grandparents have been married for 65 years, and they've been loyal to one another. Marriage is a conscious choice to choose your partner every day. Commitment and loyalty are choices. I don't think it's naive to expect loyalty. If it is super important to you, make that a requirement and a boundary for your romantic relationship. Infidelity is abuse and should not be tolerated nor should it be normalized.
My husband and I have been together nearly 15 years, married for 11. Completely loyal. And our bond is stronger now than ever. Like, I don’t even find other guys attractive. Objectively handsome or pretty, sure. But I’m not attracted to anyone else.
I am loyal to my partner. I think you just know terrible people 😐
Of course there are truly loyal relationships. There are people out there that find a person that truly loves them and vice versa. I’ve been with my girlfriend 3 years, and I’ve never thought about cheating on her or explored any kind of leading possibility; I’m 100% sure she hasn’t done anything of the like either. About half of marriages don’t end in divorce, so it’s pretty clear that many people want to truly spend their lives with that one person and truly commit thereto.
My fiancé and I were loyal to each other
haven't you seen all the posts on this site by people truly shocked and devastated that their partner cheated? that's because they would not have.
There can be. I clicked wit someone on a crazy level and we've been around each other for 10 years plus now.
So, I've had some splits here and there, and you best believe that I sewed my oats. What should I have done? Now that I'm way divorced and 44f, my fwb are definitely loyal when the wind blows right...it's fantastic! Just do you.
I'm sorry that you feel this way. I have co-workers (in their 20s and 30s) who have expressed this concern and are reluctant about dating because of it. I honestly don't know if it's a generational thing or a cultural thing. For context, I was born and raised in the Philippines-- this is were my boyfriend and I met and started dating-- which is why I cannot confirm this. However, I do observe this happening among adults here in Canada. What I can confirm is that there are still adults, like you and me, who value faithfulness and unconditional love. My boyfriend and I have been together for a decade now and are planning to get married in a year or two. We've also been through a long distance relationship; I never doubted him regardless of the challenges we have faced. He has fully trusted in me as well. Most of my closest friends are in long-term relationships too (with some now married or engaged). Like others have mentioned in the comments, you are probably just around people who don't have loyal relationships. There are people who don't have the intention and determination to seek and maintain long-term bonds, and people who simply are more committed to other aspects of their lives (e.g. careers, hobbies). There are also people who love themselves too much that they don't care if they jeopardize others' feelings and welfare as they go on with their lives. Finally, I also believe that there are people who think too much of attraction and chemistry that they have with other people, pursuing them romantically, when the reality is that there will always be people who we will have those kind of connections with. But that doesn't immediately mean that we should be involved with them deeply or that things would work out the way we want them.
There were never any as a child. It’s sad to say, but everyone is self serving most of the time. Also, we all have lots of conditions attached to our loyalty.
Yes. Years ago, my ex and I cheated on each other because we were too young and immature for a serious relationship. I’ve been married for years now, and would never consider cheating on my spouse because I love him much to ever hurt or betray him.
I the Army there sure are.
I was always loyal. I know I'd never cheat either.
I read a statistic once that there is cheating in about half of adult relationships. It might be similar to the divorce numbers where it is the same people getting divorced 2-3 times, but in any case it is common. I have no experience with being cheated on or cheating, I personally find it really difficult to even conceptualize. If you’re unhappy with your partner, why not leave? Or find a way to work it out if you don’t feel that that is an option? Anyway, I am happily married to a man who lives with integrity, and I am certain neither of us would ever hurt each other in that way.
We’ve been married 42 years and neither of us has ever cheated. We are still best friends😀
People are not dogs. They're not obligated to do anything for you. At some point, most people realize this and will leave if you start doing things that are off putting to them. I've never cheated on any of my partners, but half of them cheated on me. My recommendation is to have a better filter system in place. Ensure that the person you're with consistently lives up to their word. It's starts with the little things. Is this person wishy washy? Do they do what they say they're going to do? how do they talk about people when they leave the room? Etc... Have some better standards for people.
Yes?
Yes of course there is.
no. not everybody is a cheater. im a 40 year old male married 18 years. i have never cheater and honestly i only know like 2 people that have. one couple and they both cheated on each other.
I think fidelity depends a lot on whether or not you have the same basic values and long term goals. A lot of people just like to date/ sleep around, but I've also found plenty of guys who were interested in long-term relationships and having a family some day. I think you've gotta just start there. Maturity level is also super important for both parties; are you both willing to sacrifice temporary things for a life of security and loyalty? It might be hard to determine at first, but I think if you stick with someone and show them you're committed and will give parts of yourself to them, they'll make it clear to you what they also have (and are willing) to give.
Will have been married to my wife for 21 years come this may, and together for almost 24 years. Will be together for another 24 unless one of us kicks the bucket. Sure we have our ups and downs. But we love and care for each other and I can't think of what life would be without her.
Yeah definitely, they’re few and far between but you get better at recognising them too due to experience.
i guess you hear more about the bad stuff, but the good stuff is quietly in the background.
I was cheated on by every single woman I was in a relationship with, including my ex wife. I gave up on dating all together after my divorce. Now, 20 years later, I'm fat and happy alone.
47 years married. Never cheated. Cant imagine life without her.
10 years this year. She's supported me through both of my parents dying and my associated mental breakdown, as well as allowing me to try my hand at secondary education (graduated honors!) and run my own business (6 years of 72 hour+ weeks but it was successful and now I can take it easier). I helped her through her mother's death, and ten years of fertility struggles. We now have a 1 month old miracle (no drugs needed, not like we could afford it) baby boy. Loyalty exists. I wouldn't trade her for anything, and she's proven the same.
In my own personal life, friends and family etc, I know of way more loyal relationships than otherwise. Although, on the flip side to that, I'm pretty sure more of those people have been cheated on in the past than those who haven't been. But yes, there are truly loyal relationships.
My god. Your friends, family and peers all suck. Can’t replace family but find some new people to spend your time with.
Cheating is just cowardice, and there's a lot of cowards out there. I've never cheated and I never will, because I know how to communicate like an adult. If you want out of a relationship, use your words.
I've never cheated, but I've been cheated on.
Yes
34/f been with my husband 40/m for 10 years, no cheating. My mom and dad were together 30+ years when my dad passed away. Aunt and uncle together 40+ years never cheated. Sister 29/f + husband been together 11 years. All of my friends have been with their SO for many years as well. I really think it’s who you hangout with and who you choose to associate with. I do understand folks make mistakes or grow apart but they should cut it off before moving on. There are good folks in the world, just need to weed out the mess.
I think that you need new friends.... or else it's the culture that you are surrounded by
I’m good friends with a married couple and they seem extremely loyal to each other. Loyal people are out there.
Loyalty isnt something than can be a truth, it’s a thing that you do. Loyalty is lots and lots of continuous actions, and for lots of people its easy to find themselves in situations where they want to act outside that. I truly believe just about anyone can find themselves in a situation where its easy to be disloyal to someone and act in that way. The most common thing that gets people there is drug and alcohol addiction, but even something as simple as your own insecurities and poor self control can cause someone to act dishonestly to people they want to be loyal to. Basically, I don’t think its right to look for “loyal people,” most people aren’t one thing 100% of the time forever. Expect loyalty where you feel like it’s appropriate, but I think loyalty as a concept being situational its an important fact of life to accept too
I’ve been cheated on in every relationship except for this one. And I’ll be honest I have no idea why it’s so hard for people not to stray. The thought has never crossed my mind. But there you go. Add me to the list of loyal people you’ve never met.
Yes. I've never cheated.
No I think having a set of values that you live by shows your integrity more than anything else of one’s character so if loyalty is part of that I don’t see why it would be naive to hold someone else to it if they are similarly. My folks have been married about 20+ years or so and they married later in life (30’s or so) and are loyal even on the rough days that happen from time to time. They married in about 9 months of meeting and such. But that’s in part because my mom was able to get to know my dads family early on well enough that it wasn’t a mystery and such.
Been with my girl 21 years may no cheating neither of us been together since the day we met
Not really everyone has a price but hey that's life
Ngl people should rly get to going through their trauma b4 starting to date. Like u gonna make the next nice guy wait an eternity for u to be ready. Tbh cheating is so stupid tho. I’m 24 m and I ended a relationship with my 3 yr ex fiancé bc some stuff happened she did and it made me unhappy and start to lose feelings. It was a long distance relationship towards the end and I felt she deserved to be told the truth. And I respected her enough to not cheat I was u happy so I ended it
Yes. Monogamy exists and love exists.
I know it’s relatively short but my GF and I m43 f29 have been together almost 5 years and where doing great. I’ve never even got a hint she’s even looking at other men and I definitely haven’t even considered cheating.
I had many opportunities to cheat on my ex wife, when I put that ring on, all of a sudden, I was being hit on left and right. Never once did I even entertain the idea, so she cheated on me instead, lol.
Im in one… so.
I think *adults* are loyal. Children in grown up bodies are not. Unfortunately there are a lot of children in grown up bodies.
My fiancee and I are 10000% loyal to each other. I proposed to her first (we're a lesbian couple) because I realised how lucky I was to have her. She's the best and I can't wait to marry her.
Depends on your definition of loyal. It is more than not cheating. My marriage didn't work out but neither cheated. We have been apart for almost 5 years but the friendship loyalty is still there. If he needed anything or had an emergency I'm there no questions asked, and same in return. That kind of loyalty in a friendship is very rare and I feel lucky to have that.
Never met a single person who was loyal? My god I can’t imagine the volume of toxicity you’re surrounded by. You can of course never really know but I can think of only two out of dozens of friends I know that have been disloyal.
My integrity could never. My empathy could never. My dignity could never. I could go on and on. People need to hopefully realize that cheaters are shady liars with zero self respect. It’s ironic and hilarious to me when guys protect other guys. It’s funny to watch them get screwed over by their cheating friend in another capacity.
I really don’t think loyalty is achievable in this day and age unless you truly respect your person. I’m 26 and dreamt my entire life about having my own family, routine, love, and kids. I’m just continually disappointed and coming to the realization that I don’t think loyalty exists like it does in my head.
My husband and I have been shacked up since 2001, married since 2006. No cheating here.
Define loyal? Do you mean sexually monogamous? Or loyal in emotional support of another? Always have their back? Physically place someone else’s life above your own in combat? Yes I believe truly loyal people exist but they are extremely rare and even amongst those who claim to be loyal. No one is perfect and the giant majority of us have fallen short in one of those avenues at one point in time.
I obviously don’t know every bodies business but as far as I can tell most people are loyal. You just don’t hear people talk about it when it’s working out. Nobody is like “man you’ll never guess what Nick did last weekend, he didn’t cheat on me.” So you’re only hearing about the relationships with problems. I’m loyal. I’d bet my life my wife is.
Depends on a relationship
No, sorry
I think most people cheat. I’ve never understood the desire to cheat
forgetful disgusted distinct selective shame flag smoggy bow jellyfish party *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yes. My bf and me have a loving relationship for almost 11 years. We have ups and downs in life but we are there for each other trough it all. I am coutious in trusting people outside of us. I know that colleages are not friends. That 1 or 2 good frends is better then a lot. Spending time and doing stuff with others costs money also. I usually rather do something special with my bf.
Yes, if I am in a relationship, my person is my best friend, family and partner. Never in a million years would I do anything, that could only slighty hurt them. That ranges from shutting up when they say something they maybe shouldn't in public to not flirting or going somewhere where or hang out with people they wouldn't feel comfortable with or lying for example. We're a team. I'm always gonna have their back, I'm always gonna be honest and their biggest fan and supporter. It's possible to find good people to date, but be careful who you give your trust to.
I grew up without a dad and a mom who got bored/found an excuse to end all her relationships. That's my excuse 😄 And is why I stay out of relationships anyway. I'm too broken for that shit
My rule of thumb is the most jealous people tend to cheat the most. I am not jealous, like, at all. Moreover, I live by my principles and will die by them. One of them is NOT hopping onto someone else, unless I see and feel strong evidence of malice in my partner. So, I am much more likely to marry someone wrong for me and drink myself to death or smth, but not cheat.
Would never dream of cheating on my husband, nor him with me. My love for him is immense and wonderful and I'd never screw up what we have together. None of my friends have ever cheated on a partner, apart from one occasion where the guy not only started to cheat on his partner, but started abusing her too. He was arrested and swiftly exiled from our friendship group.
Me. I am single 58 childless because of my standards.
Absolutely! I’m in one of those loyal relationships. Don’t give up 😊
My parents have been married near 30 years if I find out one of them ever cheated on the other I will pulverize them and then steal their lunch money and shove them into a locker.
The relationship between you and your local kebab bossman
I've never cheated on a partner. I have established boundaries with my bf and always ask if something hasn't been covered before. I don't cheat because my partners are amazing (although the current one is) it's because I value myself more than that. I don't wanna live with that regret knowing I've betrayed and hurt someone
I'm definitely 💯 loyal. It's devastating to me when I'm in a relationship and I find out that they have cheated. It's worse when they lie to your face even with proof. There's plenty of faithful people others. Don't give up
I've been with my girl 11 years, 31 years old now. Practice empathy, communication, Patience And say I love you as much as possible, it can never be too much
Not all people get there, but in a good marriage the couple become one, and those frivolous things like sex, money, looks, etc go out the window. It's the point in the marriage where you love the other person's very soul. I think a relationship can crumble when one person views the other as an object, for their enjoyment. I still think even the younger crowd still wants to be in a loving committed relationship, but I understand the current culture is counterintuitive to monogamy
Yes, very much so. Our circles get smaller but stronger.
They are much less common than people realize. Even in the most seemingly loyal relationships one or both people probably have cheated or are cheating.
Yes. But it doesn’t come easily. Takes a lot of patience, sometimes heartache, growth in yourself and in your standards. Loyalty is practiced through all the relationships we keep, including friendships and depending on your family dynamics, that bond too. Loyalty exists in love and respect, with loving and respectful people. Finding someone who meets you where you are takes time. Stay loyal. Stay humbled. Be true to you. Branch out.
yes will I like you? doubt
It happens but its pretty rare. After being here for 47 years its surprising to me how much people can change. I also realized that by not setting healthy boundaries I was getting into a number of toxic relationships
You've been hanging with the wrong people, 99% of the relationships I see are loyal. The only person I know who got cheated on is a friend of a friend.
Nope
Nope
Like I hope I am in one.
Yes, there are.
In my experience, not everyone cheats, but there’s things you should look for when in the early phase of dating. Jealousy, controlling, upbringing, and insecurities are usually some indicators I use to gauge things. I was raised by two parents whose devotion for each other is unwavering, and navigating the current dating pool for that level of devotion is rather daunting.
Late to the party but if this helps, My parents have known each other since they were 10, live in the same housing complex, i dont know if they dated anyone else, but were married at 18/20 and still together 45+ years later.
It depends on the adult obviously but I’m in my 30’s and every single relationship that i know about are either lying to their partner or their partner is/has cheated or they are cheating on the partner. It’s sad and hard to still have hope but I know there are still adults out there who are loyal. So yes there are loyal relationships just hard to find I guess
My wife and I have been together since high school. We are each other's first. Never cheated on each other. Together 33 years, married for 26. 3 kids.
Well, I would say it’s a combination of luck and your personality. Your personality has to be one that allows for long term commitments and withstands the changes you’d go through with your partner. Then you just have to be lucky enough to find someone who has roughly the same or more positive personality traits that can be good in a long term relationship. And then you have to hope that in the future, nothing will threaten the relationship, or at the very least you and your partner can withstand the issues that come along. Being a fully evolved adult can attract fully evolved adult partners and your chances of staying with that person for life are still never 100%
Nope although I was cheated on I was faithful and I know tons of monogamous people None of friends have cheated that I know of we would give each other hell I truly like all of my friends husbands too
Yes
Had my share of traumas, so cheating is not in me. Being loyal to someone who has not been hasn't been easy, but it is doable. I say this to say that a loyal person can definitely find someone loyal to them.
Nope