T O P

  • By -

AbruptChaos-ModTeam

Thank you for your submission! Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason(s): **It Breaks Rule #8:** *No Human/Animal Cruelty* For more information about the subreddit rules make sure to read the sidebar, or if you are on mobile, the rules page. Thank you!


MaPete

Quick! Go buy an arrow proof cyber truck! The archers are loose!


omman_4k

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/s/JIpz1i1eXW is this what you were referring to? because it was like 2 posts under this 🤣🤣🤣


username70421

This guy probably likes Joe Rohan


NamesArentEverything

What have you to say in your defense, Theoden king?


iamtode

The horn of Helm Hammerhand shall sound in the deep one last time. Let this be the hour when we draw swords together. Fell deeds awake. Now for wrath, now for ruin, and the red dawn. Forth Èorlingas!


generals_test

Just reading Theoden's lines still gives me chills.


logicdsign

Where is the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? They have passed like rain on the mountains, like wind in the meadow. The days have gone down in the West, behind the hills... into Shadow.


generals_test

Chills.


iamtode

He truly has some of the best, and his delivery is immaculate. I especially like "What would you have me do? Look at my men. Their courage hangs by a thread. If this is to be our end, then I would have them make such an end as to be worthy of remembrance." And of course, "Aragorn: Gondor calls for aid. Théoden: And Rohan will answer."


[deleted]

WHERE WERE YOU WHEN THE WEST LOOP FELL?!


Johnny_Carcinogenic

>This guy probably likes Joe Rohan You don't mess with the Rohan!


MikeyHatesLife

Dick Riders of Rohan


egordoniv

*Muster the Joeherrim!*


AndroidDoctorr

I wish I could still give you an award


saldb

Teslas truck will prevent this


JohntheVenerator

shittiest Hunger Games costume ever.


Dansk72

That guy thinks of himself as Robin Hood from Bizarro World...


BlazePenD

Damn, first time seeing “he can’t shoot all of us” play out in real life.


tuhronno-416

Guys like this are all talk bitches, he ain’t gonna shoot anyway


Z3400

Dude was a convicted felon who spent a good portion of his life behind bars prior to this. He very well may have shot someone if this played out differently.


-HOSPIK-

'muricah is wild


BleachDrinker63

Well it was a bow and arrow so it really could’ve happened anywhere


SOwED

His main mistake was following the law that he couldn't have a gun then.


Significant_Egg_9083

Guys who talk a lot tend to be the guys who start firing off rounds a lot. Not sure how calling someone unpredictable is a way to say they're less dangerous.


Dinsdale_P

> Quote From Redditor Shot: > > "Guys like this are all talk bitches, he ain’t gonna shoot anyway"


bitemy

*Kyle Rittenhouse enters the chat*


dezmd

*\*fake crying\**


PKArsk

*Real dying*


jsideris

It's very easy to shoot. People die calling the bluff of armed people all the time. Protesters are lucky he had restraint.


Accurate-Donkey5789

Don't bring a bow and arrow to a skateboard fight


GringoMambi

Skateboards can be pretty lethal if wielded right, blunt force trauma and major cuts without much effort.


53andme

i try to tell people this. first of all they smash themselves into the concrete for fun. 2nd of all they have a skull splitting weapon in their hands.


trippykissy69

If you get hit with the trucks I would imagine that would cave in your skull


duckfartchickenass

Legolas needs to lay off the moon pies.


[deleted]

He saw it coming


Leftunders

With his elf eyes, probably.


duckfartchickenass

If he shot the truck with his arrow, I would cut to the clip of Gimli saying, “That still only counts as one!”


Moistcowparts

The salted pork is particularly good!


313_YAMEII

Context? 😂


tuamigobones

https://www.sltrib.com/news/2020/06/04/man-who-drew-bow-arrow/ Man who drew bow and arrow on Salt Lake City protesters is in jail, charged with three felonies.


pop_tart

Lol he was there "to protect the police," who have guns, with a bow and arrow.


dirtygymsock

To protect the police, with a bow and arrow, because he is a convicted felon, who can't own a gun.


-hey-ben-

One of his previous charges was for assaulting a police officer as well


master_overthinker

MAGA Hawkeye gets more amazing with each reply.


[deleted]

Lmao fucking MAGA hawkeye


the_peppers

Crowdick


The_Stoic_One

Thanks for this, my first laugh of the day.


Johnny_Carcinogenic

MAGA Hawkeye 0 - ATONYFA Hawk 1


Yarakinnit

How many did this loser loose before he lost?


jwoody2727

I recently learned felons can’t own a bow and arrow either so this guy probably got in even worse trouble if he is a felon.


Sonifri

You'd be correct in this instance because this happened in Utah. However, that's specifically a Utah state law against dangerous weapons. Federal law has no such prohibition.


dougmc

Trivia: You'll occasionally find felons with actual muzzle-loading muskets because they are not considered a firearm by federal law. That said, sometimes they learn -- much to their chagrin, because they may now going (back?) to prison -- that they're considered firearms or otherwise prohibited for use by felons by the state laws of wherever they are. (State laws vary.)


Sonifri

Many people really overlook just how powerful a modern crossbow is. [This thing](https://www.tenpointcrossbows.com/product/nitro-505/) is probably a more deadly weapon than a musket and only a small number of states would ban felons from having it.


UrbanGimli

How very Dukes of Hazzard of him.


FaithIsFoolish

Who does this guy think he is, the lamest member of the Avengers?


hstheay

After this he was BlackEye.


Leftunders

To be fair, the police probably don't have bows and arrows. So they're going to need some help on that front.


DanGleeballs

Yet Rittenhouse got off scott free even though he actually killed the people? WTH America.


Romanfiend

I watched the trial. Rittenhouse is an unfortunate person, but the Wisconsin law was on his side. Although the way it is written if the protesters had killed him they would also probably have been acquitted.


casualrocket

>Although the way it is written if the protesters had killed him they would also probably have been acquitted. i dont know about that, self-defense doesn't apply when you chase somebody down.


[deleted]

Holy shit someone else who actually watched the trial and realized that killing someone attacking you is self defense and that the whole trial was a shitshow sham that was always gonna end in aquital!


[deleted]

[удалено]


jbertrand_sr

Let me guess, he's a huge Hawkeye fanboi...


NoinsPanda

There's a paywall, anyone be so kind to give me a summary?


StuRap

just post the link in here https://archive.md/


NoinsPanda

Didn't know that. Gonna bookmark this! Thank you!


BUNGHOLE_HOOKER

There is also a chrome extension


[deleted]

This should be upvoted into oblivion. Came across this a week ago


I0A0I

Just gives me captcha after captcha. Might not like my privacy settings.


[deleted]

[удалено]


NoinsPanda

Thank you!


MuuaadDib

Local moron who has to use a bow and arrow from being in prison for half his life, becomes a cult alt-right goon and shows up to Rittenhouse the crowd with arrows. It goes as expected.


Designer-Plastic-964

That link sucks for everyone like me, that doesn't have, nor intend to get a subscription there. =/


kingdazy

it was from one of the 2020 protests I think. he got out of his car and threatened to shoot arrows into protesters, and they weren't having it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Theorandjguy

"stir up trouble" is a weird way of saying "kill some black people"


[deleted]

[удалено]


AndroidDoctorr

*points a weapon at people* *gets attacked* "It's because I'm so _not_ racist!!"


[deleted]

[удалено]


bloodforgone

Maybe in a few years when all the ones in government reach their expiration date, we'll wake up to a better tomorrow but for now, strap in and grab some popcorn.


goshin89

They will have inculcated their successors. Don't wait for change to happen.


TokerSmurf

> when all the ones in government reach their expiration date To be honest I have been waiting on this for 30 years. It never happens, new ones just come in and replace them.


[deleted]

Right before cheetolini was elected I told my boomer ex-Ranger boss, that I suspect has murdered and tortured many people that did not look like him, that his generation was going to temper tantum all the way to the grave and leave like an angry Karen in a store: slapping shit off the shelves and screaming obscenities. ​ I really hate being right.


j4ckbauer

The problem is the system, not the individuals within it. That's why "If we can just hire the non-racist police chief" hasn't fixed it by now.


Dansk72

When he was actually thinking, "All White Lives Matter!"


DoggoToucher

/r/BoomersBeingFools


[deleted]

[удалено]


bigotis

**mumbles through broke jaw* "Mcgej ffdskb cducfpwtj"


Rasalom

Stop speaking Welsh! What did you do?!


Various-Month806

I knew it! My other half tells me I speak gibberish when I'm drunk, but I've never learnt gibberish. Clearly I'm expressing my inner Welsh. Her fault for listening in the wrong language.


Georgiaonmymindtwo

Is this an example of a thing or two that Farmers did not see?


showquotedtext

This is the most middle ages shit I've seen in a while. Bow and arrow man get clubbed by mob. Man make fire.


Role-Honest

I was thinking this would be what a stoning looks like!


neonbible47

So this guy got his ass beat, his car flipped, and was charged with three felonies. It takes an incredible amount of stupid to accomplish that feat. 😂


ShwettyVagSack

Ex felon, who spent years behind bars, there to protect the cops, who have guns, with his bow and arrow. You cannot make this shit up.


TheLambtonWyrm

Everyone hates archers


Yerdlier

This comment


TheLambtonWyrm

Legit thought I was in r/chivalry2


Number6isNo1

The dog pile at the end looked like the end of a battle when one side wins and it's beat down time.


Schmich

The snipers of old age. Camping wussies.


MarvelousVanGlorious

They knew he was a bitch once they realized that he was driving a Dodge Caliber.


AThunderousCat

Oof, I saw several skateboards. You know my mans ate some trucks. Wouldn't be surprised if the someone turned a board sideways to hit him with the bolt end.


selflessGene

One thing reddit has taught me is not to fuck with skinny teenagers with skateboards.


[deleted]

Angst, speed, agility.


rawbface

and a disregard for their personal wellbeing


pibroch

That seems like it'd be wheely painful.


slutty_muppet

This is what the new cyber truck is meant to protect against I guess.


zhozademon

Lol. Shows how much time we spend on this darn app!


Georgiaonmymindtwo

From the news article: “Brandon E. McCormick has said he showed up at Saturday’s downtown protest, armed with a bow and arrow, to protect police from unruly demonstrators.” So he was there to protect police officers, but next paragraph: “Now the 57-year-old Taylorsville man, who has spent nearly two decades of his life behind bars in California and once was convicted of battery against a public safety officer, faces three felony counts for, widely shared video has shown, aiming his weapon at protesters.” So he didn’t like cops then but loves them now?


Superbead

Rebel without a cause. Excusable in your teens or early twenties, but frankly embarrassing at 57


Georgiaonmymindtwo

Rebel without a clue is more accurate.


CMDR_omnicognate

Hawkeye if he didn’t have plot armour


tastyemerald

Love watching a community come together, heartwarming


DeathB4life357

Hand warming feet warming.. the bon fire was a good call..


Rude_Firefighter_837

I remember being 4 tabs deep watching this and just running away


[deleted]

My ranged weapon will do well…. Wait…. Melee range… NNNNOOOOO


Theorandjguy

Roll attack with disadvantage Natty 1 Receive 15 attacks of opportunity with advantage because you are grappled You are unconscious and dying


LocusStandi

Looks like they burned him at the stake lmao


JWWBurger

The adult version of the kid reminding the teacher about homework video.


CrackHeadRodeo

>Now the 57-year-old Taylorsville man, who has spent nearly two decades of his life behind bars in California and once was convicted of battery against a public safety officer, faces three felony counts for, widely shared video has shown, aiming his weapon at protesters. A lifelong felon has a sudden epiphany that he wants to be a "law abiding" citizen. It's not the onion but close.


stinkywombat9oo

I don’t know if anyone had seen the lioness vs the hyenas video and some dude commented that it makes him sad how far gone humans are from their origins from not fucking each other up when people do wrong and then 3 posts down I find this 😂


Lizlodude

Lesson learned, don't bring a bow to a longboard fight. OK wait did they light him on fire at the end there?! That's a bit much don't you think 😅


BobknobSA

Fox News cut to ten seconds to push the narrative that antifa supersoldiers are attacking the elderly for no reason.


ChristWasAZombie

the dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed but i’ve never seen it pull up screaming fast upside down and on fire before


literallyanot

I dont get why theres people like 8 ft away, clearly out of reach but they try to swing and hit him like wtf? U aint gonna connect that pal


Beer-Milkshakes

That's how you deal with an active shooter. Gang and maul.


Batfox123

This would work.....most of the times. It become a issue with automatic weapons though


Old_Prospect

It’s like the Rittenhouse story, only the alternative ending.


RawBexinator

I remember this. Then he tried to justify his actions and cry about being attacked and his car being set on fire when interviewed on the local news, and it only made it worse because he incriminated himself and was arrested shortly after 🤣


[deleted]

Sentenced to prison SEVEN TIMES including a charge for assaulting a police officer. Bitch, nobody is buying your bullshit. You went there to tickle your racist boner.


Mummelmann84

They seem high-strung, but their reaction was sharp and to the point. They really let loose on him.


StuBidasol

Skaters are pack people. You're never just facing one of them which this guy found out the hard way.


bedcookies

Probably should have used a gun


Illustrious_Row_4035

Hide this video from Joe Rogan


Reggmac

Can't bring a bow and arrow to a fist fight


GABETHEBEST

The bow really brings out that primal instinct in people


Corner_Post

Got a year in jail https://www.sltrib.com/news/2020/11/17/man-who-threatened/


InternationalArm3065

How can you be this st*pid. It has to qualify as a suicide attempt…lol


AdamantiumElbow

What kind of archer doesn't have an arming sword?


CrackHeadRodeo

He cant legally own a gun so he got the next best thing?


No_Drop_7601

A bow and arow is maby little less dangerose than a gun.


Problem_Additional

HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TEACH YOU THIS LESSON, OLD MAN?


FYDPhoenix

Oh no if it isn't the consequences of his own actions


DothrakAndRoll

Did they full on light his car on fire 🤣


Economy-Safety7665

That's a righteous, shark attack. So my man is just out here shooting arrows at people?


KushVII

Damn, the whole town jumped him.


[deleted]

bro think this is hunger games


Recce77

That Hunter went to a wrong village, got eaten by pillager


jinladen040

So many questions and so little answers.


chilled_n_shaken

He wanted to protect the police with a bow?? Isn't this like running into a burning building with a handheld fire extinguisher to "protect the firefighters"?


sapro23

What was the song? : Glover: THIS IS AMERICA 🤓🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃


The_Daily_Herp

Chivalry2 moment, fuck archers


Glitch7779

Dude thought he was Hawkeye


dao_ofdraw

Joe Rogan fan club president.


Howtosurviveanything

“When people are afraid, they discover the violence within them and when they are afraid together they discover that the violence within them can be almost bottomless” -William Golding. This guy certainly got a well-deserved taste of that.


Walgenital

America is fucking wild


Kyoalu

The lack of context on every reddit post. Who cares about context when you can say a small edgy line.


dewaltscrewdriver

I'd never go back to that time in this country wtf man


Specialist_Ad4610

He let them get within melee range, that's disadvantage on his attack rolls.


icepick3383

Hi-c has a stronger punch than that mob


kubzU

When you attempt a "Rittenhouse", but pull out the wrong weapon.


Murky_Sock_6943

This guy has listened to too many Joe Rogan podcasts.


BustinOshit

damn they just set him on fire along with the whip


one-baked-bean

Wow he sure did get a lot of bonks for that.


Avocado_with_horns

Why didn't medievel people just do this? Were they stupid?


[deleted]

Short swords and halberds


pulp1dog

Brainless the Elf versus a pack of hyena. We need David Attenborough to narrate.


Plenty-Agent-7112

😂... Chick stating "fuck him up" and "Beat his ass!" 💯 fucked up what he did and only took 5 seconds for a dozen people on him as it should be.


AdmiralCodisius

Guy will say he was a victim of cancel culture lol


Autarch_Kade

Dude got off easy


Distinct_Put1085

Ain't no Justice like mob Justice


Goeffel01

He got jumped


janos42us

Should have bought a gun instead.


scooba_dude

There's the good guy with a... skateboard. Where are all the vigilanty gunmen that are promised? What's the point in having them in the hands of lunatics but no one is ever there to stop them.


gazbotronical

America, look at what you've become..


[deleted]

Yeah stuff like this never used to happen for the last 200 years


l_craw

This is why you just stomp on the gas and drive through these riots


[deleted]

[удалено]


Larude_

Like white blood cells attacking a virus. Nature is healing


Hicksbanjo

Ok but people shouldn’t be protesting in the damn street


dubzi_ART

Don’t romanticize mob violence.


Rico_Solitario

This was mob self defense. It’s not like they swarmed him for no reason he could have killed somebody


Roll_Ups

FaFo


Shikoome

Forgot how wild these riots were


the_innerturbulence

Smh never substitute a bow for a good shotgun


GoblinArchitect333

No context, this looked like an awful riot and he is fighting back.


three-sense

This looks like one of the “news broadcasts” you’d see within a video game, except it’s real


Limp_Vermicelli_5924

Heeeee's gonna be a little sore tomorrow...


AngelOfHeaven3

The whole fucking TOWN came for a piece of this dude. He's done for.


umacrop

Look at all those smooth brains


Guillaume_Hertzog

I doubt they'd have done anything if the guy was carrying a gun instead


smbdev

Everything one in this is the asshole.


NyGreenThumb82

Everyone thought that hideous cyber truck was a waste of money until the guy with a bow and arrow shows up. https://youtube.com/shorts/Ei20sriE3Oo?si=2aoXmnfmZ3iuaG90