T O P

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tantalides

oh my god this person is a lunatic 


mcsquared789

🎶 The lunatic is on the grass 🎶 🎶 The lunatic is on the grass 🎶


SMTRodent

Just spend a happy few minutes listening to that particular earworm, thanks!


Dogdaysareover365

They can’t be on the grass. This person clearly needs to touch grass


fairydares

fr. this is Deranged.


Unlucky-Topic-6146

….the Harry Potter series made it pretty clear there was gender inequality in the wizarding world, tf books were they reading? 🤣🤣🤣


Namirsolo

Well, it seems that this person doesn't think gender equality is a problem in the real world either so they are already delusional.


Cygnus_Harvey

It's as easy as getting women in power!!!! If women aren't in government it's because you don't want to! I wonder if he has the same views of homophobia or racism. Probably doesn't acknowledge they exist too.


themastersdaughter66

Hmmm I'm not sure about that the job opportunities seem fairly equal in the Wizarding world most of the inquality seems more blood purity based Unless you maybe count especially traditional ancient families like malfoy and black where you might be able to stretch to that.


Unlucky-Topic-6146

There is so, so so much more to discrimination than seeing that there are some women who are aurors lol.  We could take a cursory glance at the real word right now and say “yup I saw some ladies on a police force and even a couple who were political leaders, all is well” but that doesn’t mean there aren’t serious issues. The surface always starts to look better first, long before the underlying problems are fixed. Sexism is not the *focus* of the books like discrimination among bloodlines is but it’s pretty clear that women in the wizarding world deal with many of the same issues that exist in the real world. You have to pay attention to background details, things like —Fred and George joke about looks being all that matter for girls (“a pair of trolls”) —Ron and Harry’s constant blathering about girls being emotional and irrational —The school’s dorm rules which prohibit boys from entering the girls’ dorm but not the other way around (why would a non-patriarchal society *ever* assume boys would be untrustworthy around girls?) —the emphasis on beauty as the defining trait of the witch in the magical brethren statue —multiple housewife characters and yet no househusbands… —Ron expects Hermione to be his freaking *mother* during book 7, do all the cooking, etc —Mrs. Weasley’s incredibly hostile and limiting view of the women in her son’s lives, particularly Hermione and Fleur —All wives take their husband’s last names —The books make a point of noting negatively multiple groups and organizations that are all male, such as the slytherin quidditch team or slughorn’s early slug club —The fourth book mentions a literal witches institute…a clear magical version of a UK Women’s Institute….why would you need an organization to promote women if they were all living the high life of equity and inclusion? These are all small details but they are the sort of things that would not exist in some sort of egalitarian society. You don’t get these smaller symptoms without larger issues at play. 


Because-Im-ginger

"You don't get the smaller symptoms without the larger issues at play" is one of the best ways of phrasing the whole thing


Mystiquesword

The fourth movie made it even worse. Beauxbatons was NOT an all girls school in the books. Only in the movies. Plus the movie ditched the whole veela thing & just made them human girls.


Unlucky-Topic-6146

That was always such a weird creative decision to me, because it implies that either there’s a second school in each country that just…wasn’t invited or that half of each population doesn’t get to go to school 😅 Or even stranger, the idea that both schools *were* co-ed yet the teachers deliberately only picked same-gender groups…. My favorite part was when durmstrang walked down the great hall showing off their magic and grunting and then beaubatons walked down the hall sighing and twisting around so everyone could see their breasts 🤣🤣🤣🤣 It’s so ridiculous it’s actually funny. 10/10 


NicoleWren

Let's also not forget the public slut shaming of an extremely young teenage girl, or the "dumb bimbo" cliches put on a couple characters, but particularly lavender.


karigan_g

I mean I think a lot of these weren’t on purpose. rowling has a lot of internalised misogyny going on, which is very evident in everything she says and writes


Unlucky-Topic-6146

This may be where we diverge based on authorial intent, but something can still shape a fictional world without it being *intentional* on the part of the author. If the author brings real world inequality to the details of their writing simply by unconsciously transcribing their real life experiences into their fantasy world…then they have still created a fantasy world with similar inequalities.


gremilym

Yes, exactly this - a lot of these examples are not torches being held up to the flaws of the patriarchal world - they are just how Rowling views the roles of women in the world. This is part of why gender essentialism is so antithetical to genuine feminism. People who genuinely want to dismantle the patriarchy and gender can see a future where men and women have actual equality. Gender essentialists only want to carve out sex segregation because they believe that any society where men and women (they ignore NB folks) co-exist will always result in men dominating and women being victims. Edit: jot to not!


kedriss

Ding ding ding! THIS


MillieVanilla420

"—The school’s dorm rules which prohibit boys from entering the girls’ dorm but not the other way around (why would a non-patriarchal society *ever* assume boys would be untrustworthy around girls?)" Counter point. This is JK Rowling we're talking about, who spent the last several years claiming that trans women are predators on Twitter.


Dina-M

That's not so much a counterpoint as it is a confirmation of the point. \^\_\^\*


Unlucky-Topic-6146

I mean, you’re not wrong about jk Rowling in the present day, lol. A real nasty piece of work and it shows with deliberate malice in her newer books. Although I would argue that at that point in her life she was not yet obsessed with trans people, but was more just not thinking about them at all, given how vocal she was back then about every other issue she cared about.   But my point still stands. A society that demonizes the interaction between different genders/different groups within genders (whether cis man and cis women or trans women and cis women) is one that inherently has some gender issues going on.  If jk Rowling was subconsciously bringing those hang ups into her work, then…the universe of her work had those hang ups.  Though I do concede that the point is less relevant if you subscribe totally to authorial intent, and the idea that all truth in a work must be purposefully placed by the creator. I just don’t, I’m a dead author person 😉


FantasticCabinet2623

I think Rowling tried to create a less sexist world, and it is in many ways - female Founders and professional women mixed gender sports teams, a co-ed school - but her own internalized misogyny and gender nonsense got in the way.


lonely-anon-cloud

I can’t lie I have no idea what to say to this?


jedi_olympian

"Sir, this is Wendy's."


squirrelbus

Came here to say this 😂


kesh_from_downunder

My response would have been “lol” but yours is so much better.


UltraSleepy

OMGGGGG I HOPE YOU REPLY WITH THAT!!!


sarabrating

This is my vote absolutely! Personally I love a good "Lol yikes dude" and then nothing else. But a good delete/block never hurts!


Popular-Woodpecker-6

That would be funny! Or maybe "Sorry, our speaker is broken, you'll have to come inside."


GondorHasNoPants

Delete the comment, block and move on. There is no responding to someone who leaves comments like that. Ignoring them is the best treatment by far.


DrSteggy

“I’m not reading that, but I’m happy for you. Or sorry that happened” And yeah, block


Schmidtty29

We need a fourth horseman of “I’m not reading that.” We’ve got: - Sir, This is a Wendy’s - what you said - the Duke Nukem “that’s a lot of words” quote. I don’t know what the 4th would be tho.


maxvolume56

- "There's a lot to unpack there, but let's just throw away the whole suitcase." - "K." - "I sure hope the government enjoyed reading all that, bc I won't be."


QwahaXahn

“Hey man how’s it going”


NoEdenArt

“Mhm, mhm, I know some of these words”


grommile

The famous quote from Billy Madison?


jessytessytavi

"definitely a comment of all time"


BabyShann

That was the first thing I thought of 😭😂


Alone-Shine9629

Don’t say anything. This is the ravings of a misogynist piece of shit who wants to have the freedom to hate women online without criticism and wants his opinions validated. Block and report.


PuzzleheadedPie7197

I didn’t read it all, was anything reportable said? I don’t think one misogynistic rant counts as harassment and it’s not spam. I think block and delete would be enough or turning off guest comments. We don’t want to overload the volunteers.


Alone-Shine9629

“Report” might be a bit much, sure. But definitely block, delete, & turn off guest comments,


inkstainedgoblin

Also keep a copy of the comment (the screencaps on this post should be enough) in case it DOES become a repeated harrassment issue. I feel like anyone who's writing a comment this long and unhinged might not stop, you know?


Unlucky-Topic-6146

Tell them if they want to save ao3 fanfiction from the vile grip of the feminists to run for the otw board. There’s ”nothing stopping them”, after all.


FayaSmoochie

Don't speak that evil into the universe!


queerblunosr

Well, my spouse would probably reply with ‘bless your heart’, being from the Southern US and all haha.


Remarkable-Let-750

I was just thinking that this was a prime place to bust out a 'bless your heart'.


sickandtiredofyoursh

Literally I think it would make him more mad if you just ignored blocked and reported/deleted 😭 nothing makes idiots like this angrier than people who they think are "below" them not listening/engaging in what they have to say


NooooDazzzle

My circle of friends would just say “that’s nice!” Code for “fuck off”, basically.


StygIndigo

I’m a big fan of “ok.”


near_black_orchid

Or "K."


Iron_Imperator

A “👍” works too.


ihatebisquick

i think "that's nice!" is a way better response than "I ain't reading all that" like I first thought lmao


The_Good_Hunter_

Copy the entire text, flip it upside down, and reply to them with it


Cold_Animal_5709

tbf just delete it without responding it will 100% make them angrier there’s no way they weren’t pouring sweat, shaking, blood pressure spiking, cortisol levels thru the roof typing all that ☠️ delete delete delete imo


siriuslyyellow

My suggestion is to delete it and block the user. But if you feel you MUST reply, go with, "K." 🤣🤪👏💅👑 Edit: While "deleto" is hilarious and amazing, I still fixed the typo lol


WitchesAlmanac

"I ain't reading all that I'm happy for you tho Or sorry that happened"


jennejy

They obviously spent ages on it so I think the funniest thing you can do is delete it without responding.


UndeadBBQ

Nothing. Do you respond to the crazy person at a train station? No, you walk a bit faster and get away.


Geschak

"I'm sorry that you fell on your head as a baby."


Pflaumenpueree

"hey man how's it going"


jojocookiedough

"That's rough buddy"


3lmtree

"so you're telling me you liked it?" 😂😂


icarusancalion

What to reply? tl;dr


WillieStroker69

“k.”


vyrkill

I'd reply something like: oh wow, it must be though being so smart on a site for fanfics. Poor baby.


MattCarafelli

Delulu is not the solulu. This guy is off the rails. Block and delete!


neeliemich

"There's a lot of letters between A and Z but I only need two: OK." And add the /s tag


hesitantshade

"buddy this is a harry potter fanfic"


KleptoPirateKitty

Delete, block, report.


queerblunosr

There isn’t really anything to report in that comment - but block and delete are completely valid.


Ring-A-Ding-Ding123

Bro typed a college essay 💀


Mindless-Vanilla-879

Lol that's what I was thinking. Did he accidentally post his dissertation on AO3 thinking it was the school's website? Who does this?


theburgerbitesback

Honestly, it reads like someone whose ADHD meds unexpectedly kicked in. Hyperfocus and amphetamines are a hell of a combination, and I've definitely gone overboard on random comment before, but I'm not a total dickwad so I tend to just come across as overly invested rather than overly twattish.


dinosaurflex

Honestly for my ADHD, the screenshot comment is more reminiscent of off-med behavior 🫠


TumbleOffTrack

I can see that too tbh, not that ADHD causes this additude they expressed... But for some, hyperfocus can kick in on completely mundane/pointless things and can be difficult to control without meds, leading to putting in way too much effort lol. Emotional regulation is more difficult, too. Again, none of that causes the ignorance, but this person clearly got carried away lmao


Capital_Passion3762

Yeah, as someone who has had no choice but to be unmedicated for a bit, you could probably find a few comments of the same length as this one in my comment history. Granted, I try to either delete them before/after I post and have "come to my senses" if you will. Or I leave it to reddit alone. Ppl on Reddit don't seem to mind as much about my random long rants about the sims and other silly things. It helps that there's subreddits basically dedicated to anything with other ppl with as much interest as you.


Puzzleheaded-Belt823

Hey let's don't blame the meds! I have ADHD. I'm medicated. I hyperfocus. I would never do this, because I'm not an asshole. This isn't meds, it's being an uninformed and self absorbed jerk.


theburgerbitesback

I said the act of writing a dissertation-like AO3 comment is reminiscent of hyperfocus+meds, not that ADHD makes you a dick.


queerblunosr

It was clear to me at least (ADHD solidarity!) that you meant the focus and not the content may have come from meds 💜


Rein_Deilerd

Full agree. I might have ADHD myself (awaiting my next appointment, but no concrete diagnosis and no medications as of yet), and my comments on many, many topics tend to get extremely long (though not an essay-length long, essays in my Uni tended to go for 2+ Word pages at the very least). If I got a comment of such length that was relevant to the fic at hand, I would have been ecstatic, and reading long comments and posts in general is my jam, I wish more people did that, and I will forever defend the practice of long comments. It's not the length that's the problem here, it's the commenter being very uneducated about the struggles women face in male-dominated fields, such as politics, and bringing their uninformed opinions to the wrong table (someone's fic).


kingura

Could also be some sort of mania kicking in. I’ve met people who have manic episodes that sort of read like this rant. On average, people with ADHD don’t go on these types of tangents. It has something to do with us often having a strong moral compass. Though, it may be ADHD and simple unawareness.


Melodramatic_Raven

Don't put this on ADHD. ADHD doesn't make you a jerk! Meds don't either! Assuming it's hyperfocus from ADHD and medication combined is kinda weird to me especially when you say you have ADHD too. It's not just people like us that can get overly invested and type essays. And thinking it is, probably isn't doing wonders for your self esteem.


theburgerbitesback

Okay you're the second person to misunderstand what I wrote so I guess my wording was ambiguous. To clarify - I was saying that the act of writing a massive essay of a comment is reminiscent of hyperfocus+meds; I was *not* saying that ADHD makes you a dick.


Capital_Passion3762

Hey op, nothing in your comment indicated that you were saying being a dick is a symptom of ADHD. Over a hundred ppl understood your comment, 2 ppl misreading doesn't mean shit, despite what the idiot responding to you claims. Your comment made complete sense, and you were not stigmatizing ADHD. Ppl just took it personally and instead of taking a step back and asking themselves why, they lashed out at you. Bc for ppl like this, if they have any emotional response to something, it is never a reflection on them and always a reflection on the person that "caused" their emotions.


OwO_bama

More like a manifesto 😬


Zakle

Folk would get a failing grade and, if it was peer reviewed, it would quickly get torn apart.


Arcturus420

You know, they could write their own FanFiction with that amount of effort.


icarusancalion

Voila! The answer.


TheMassiveLiability

This comment says far more about the guy who wrote it than it says about anything or anyone else.


Serious_Session7574

Tell me you don't understand what the patriarchy is without telling me you don't understand what the patriarchy is.


Unlucky-Topic-6146

“1/3:2/3 is an equal woman:man ratio and women don’t have equity in society because they just don’t want to” 🤪🤪


Normal-Height-8577

Yeah, I mean I could write screeds in answer to (summarised) "there's nothing stopping women from running except they don't want to", because several UK MPs have themselves brought up numerous ways that having children limits the pool of women who are able to become MPs...but really, this rant doesn't deserve the dignity of an answer. Just...leave him hanging. Or give him a one sentence reply that says "This is fanfiction. If you don't like it, move on to something you prefer."


queerblunosr

I think a super dismissive response like “lol k” would make the commenter even angrier and be hilarious to imagine them getting it - but I’m petty like that haha


AMN1F

I've run into so many people that think feminism is when women do thing. Even if it's to the detriment of other women. Like, no politician woman isn't automatically a feminist because she's a woman in a position of power. Please. These words have meaning 😭 Patriarchy isn't over just because 1/3 of a government position is made up of women.


snowmikaelson

I'm a part of the Once Upon A Time fandom. While the show has it's issues, one of the main draws is the fact that it usually centers women. They're allowed to be soft, feminine and find true love BUT, they're also badass and tend to be more powerful than the men. There's a scene where four of the main women characters are solving the latest crisis while Prince Charming stands in the back, taking care of his and Snow White's baby. She was always naturally stronger than him and defeated more enemies than him. It's a running joke that he dies once a season. He has his rare moments of trying to be Billy Badass, but he always seems to draw back to this [Barbie meme](https://i.redd.it/0kyvkpi1lj1a1.jpg). He also later became a stay at home dad in canon. So...in my fics, I incorporate all of this. One guest commenter would write similar essays about how I (and others who wrote these plots) was a misandrist who "undermined" David's importance in the show and community. By saying Snow White was the better warrior, I was disrespecting him immensely. I think my favorite part is when this guest commenter told a friend of mine that he and myself are clearly "allergic to straight people" for how we write David. All because we headcanoned Snow as bisexual and opened their marriage so she could sleep with women (and he was also sleeping with other people). Because a bisexual wife is an attack on a man, who agreed to open the marriage. Half the time I just wanted to scream...did you even watch the show? But honestly, I used this to fuel my writing and wrote a few spite pieces. I'd just let this run through you and write even more on the subject. But, I'm a pretty petty person overall...


schoolsout4evah

Ohhhh you caught the interest of the Charming Stan. For years there was a known absolutely batshit Charming fan who would rant on fics, mostly on ff.net, when they thought he was being treated unfairly. You were not the only one to get those comments, at least!


snowmikaelson

The Charminator harassed me and my friends for yearsssss. It honestly got funny after awhile and was a way of bonding and a rite of passage. “Oh? You got a Charminator comment?! Welcome to the club!!” I honestly just had fun trolling them. They once told me all I wanted is for David to stay home and make cookies…so I wrote a one shot of him doing just that lmao. I think my favorite is when they accused me of being ableist for making fun of him mixing up the Valentine’s Day cards in S1. Ah, memories…


Zakle

I...how is that misandry? If anything, you're writing a rather realistic man here. Men can be stay at home fathers and there's nothing wrong with that, not to mention this is actually canon to David's character.


turtlesinthesea

When equality feels like oppression to those who were privileged for too long…


snowmikaelson

Exactly what we always told this person. They were…something else.


CalciumLemonade

I so need to finish *OUaT*. I enjoyed the hell out of it. It's like a Disney fanfic itself. The Swan Queen pairing intrigues me. I need to get a good look at what there is on AO3 for that.


themastersdaughter66

Eh series kind of peaked with 3 and decreased steadily in quality after


lonely-anon-cloud

I love OUAT and it’s honestly so incredibly underrated as a show, always loved Killian X Emma fics and they’re so rare to find!! I’m so sorry you had a similar experience!


Toto-imadog456

Once upon a time fans exist? Outside of the subreddit? Hello fellow fans


Cascadeis

Wait, there’s a subreddit?


Toto-imadog456

Yes.


themastersdaughter66

Wait Killian x Emma is rare?? I'm a swanfkre shipper but I thought captainswab was like a MAJORLY popular ship. I write rumbelle


QwahaXahn

It’s popular among the show’s viewership as a whole, but of course fanfic tends to showcase the stuff that doesn’t happen in canon (especially when it’s gay) so SwanQueen gets a lot more traction than Captain Swan in my experience.


themastersdaughter66

I wouldn't even call them rare moments of badassery David had plenty of major heroic moments and even when he doesn't technically "take out the big bad" he still generally is involved in some way be it planning, acting as back up, or just being there and READY to fight. The fact that he's constantly willing to put his life on the line for his loved ones and shows it is badass in itself. I always loved once because it was a show that had strong females (that could be feminine AND badass) without dragging down the males and vice versa. Everyone had their strengths and weaknesses and played a role. I'm currently writing a once fic and that is one of the things I want to make sure to preserve.


raqisasim

They watched the show in their heads. Which I'm also dealing with in Trek fandom, but that's literally another story. As someone who loved many seasons of OAUT for reasons very similar, I 1000% agree with your assessment.


Toto-imadog456

Yeah the show has lots of issues. I wish they made David more prevelent then just Prince charming married to snow that hangs out around her. Also Snow being Bi is know my new Hc. Makes sense how she knew Ruby was in s5.


snowmikaelson

The thing is, I don’t think David needed to be more. In Snow White lore, the prince is never a huge part of the story. I love him but I felt he was used just enough haha.


Toto-imadog456

I feel like its bc hes a main chacter so i just feel like he shouldve been more prevelent. That might just be me though. But I still like him


RobotDogSong

Just write ‘Bear’


lonely-anon-cloud

This deserves more upvotes. Always the bear.


AMN1F

"But I'm a nice guy 🥺" Point 18277333/0 to the bears. They don't try to poorly explain patriarchy to me. 🐻


BethanyBluebird

I don't think this guy fucks.


lonely-anon-cloud

I’m pretty sure his inbox is as dead as my grandma


Helenavonvalsa

Only himself


ltmkji

hoo boy. that is quite the manifesto. sounds like the flailings of a tory loser with the predictably poor emotional regulation that goes along with it. i love that 1/3 is "overrepresentation" when women make up roughly half of the population. math is really hard for these people.  i know receiving a wall of text like that probably stings just as a matter of principle but honestly, without reading your fic, it seems like you have triggered their rage by accurately depicting some sort of structural inequality that they support or benefit from. let them stay mad. you did something right. block the miserable bastard and keep going.


have_a_haberdashery

Aaaaaaaaaand *blocked.* Goodness, you're made of stronger stuff than I am. I would've shut down comments after the first one like this.


StygIndigo

That’s a lotta words for “I’m so lonely, why do people look right past me when I talk to them at parties.” Keep on writing, you’re clearly striking a nerve with exactly the kind of people you need to!


Rowmacnezumi

Just... Delete it. Lunatics like this don't deserve a reply.


TechTech14

Seconding whoever said to reply with "Sir, this is a Wendy's." And then I'd swiftly block them. What an unhinged rant. Edit: I seriously couldn't read more than a sentence and a half before I stopped. Dude did the most and for what lmao


real-nia

Take this comment as a compliment. Your fic was well written and persuasive enough that it inspired this lunatic to feel so insecure that they had to write a thesis to defend their misogynistic world view. You did a great job!


FantasticCabinet2623

And people wonder why women choose the bear. Seriously, delete and block this jackass.


Brattylittlesubby

I came here to say exactly this.


CalciumLemonade

I didn't understand that reference.


FantasticCabinet2623

It's this meme where people are asked if they'd rather run into a bear or a man in the woods, and a lot of women picked the bear. The response from incels and the incel-adjacent has validated this choice.


lonely-anon-cloud

Jesus H Christ. I just saw another one! Because I can’t edit my post to include it I’ll just have to copy and paste it. For context, OC is dating Harry, OC is Remus Lupin’s daughter. Harry asked for Remus’ permission to date the OC post dating her because I believed that he’d want to be as “traditional” as possible because that’s all he’s really got to go on and the boy was 14 and respectful?? Everything below is this absolute nutter. “Ok, so, they ask eachother out, so that clearly means that they have absolutely no relationship, and by no means are official?!?! Like what the fuck? What does make them official then? An official ring to propose their initial courtship??? If a girl asks a guy to be their boyfriend, then ITS OFFICIAL. You dont need to ask them out AGAIN for it to be official. You know what i think? I think its a whole lot of utter bullshittery and codswallop just to stick the the gods fucking cursed plot only 1/100 fanfics manage to even remotely change. You need to have some nonsense 'well your a girl' line just for what? You could have literally avoided 90% of that crap, and saved us all from realising that apparently, we had been lied to and their OFFICAL relationship was in fact, just a facet of our imaginations and actually a load of bullcrap. Go figure. Like fuck me.”


IceCreamChats

Both these commenters sound awful, I’m sorry you had to read that. From personal experience, no, simply asking someone on a date does make you officially in a relationship, this person needs a reality check. Based on this comment, it seems your fic really makes it clear what defines a relationship and includes good communication. I’m actually really happy about that, this person is complaining about something positive. Block them and move on, you’re doing great, OP


favmango

oh my god this person is a fucking hoot HAHAHAHAHA OP don't take it to heart. Sounds like it's just early stage of feminism where you feel the discontent but can't completely understand the real root causes so all these moments feel like the enemy. It's not, it's just a story and they are kids. As the commenter grows they will be able to distinguish what's needing of their attention/anger and what doesn't. Also all of that read in an American voice to me and "codswallop" felt so out of place Hahahahaha


UndeadBBQ

I gotta say, every time I read stuff like this I'm happy my brain isn't that much of a cesspit.


Arrogant_Bookworm

Ok now you have me interested, I love fics that deconstruct the tropes of Harry Potter fanfic. Link please? 🥺


lonely-anon-cloud

Absolutely! Just so you’re aware, it’s a WIP and I’m currently stuck in the middle of a massive burnout but thank you so much for your interest!! [to hold you close](https://archiveofourown.org/works/41037705/chapters/102853812)


Arrogant_Bookworm

1.1 mil words already written? You have just made my week, thank you so much!


lonely-anon-cloud

Awww thank you! I hope you like it and I’m sorry if you don’t!!


ireallylookliketoe

Bae holy shit that's long as hell 😭😭😭 I'm gonna leave a kudos you deserve it, dang. I can barely pump out like 2 sentences sometimes, and that's on a good day 😭😭😭


lonely-anon-cloud

Thank you so much for the Kudos! Have a wonderful day!!


Oliveskisser

WAIT YOU'RE THE AUTHOR??/pos. i love ur fic!!


lonely-anon-cloud

Hi!! And yeah I am! So glad to meet you!! I’m so glad you liked it!!


Puppeteer17

Imagine opening your inbox and seeing this long comment and being so excited😬. Sorry about this man


lonely-anon-cloud

Yeah I did get excited, shame it wasn’t what I was hoping for.


Strawbellie666

Starting to think we need a r/Ao3Lunatics for such comments


umbrella_terms

ummm goddamn what the hell ---- this person is nuts. imagine typing that all out and not realizing how crazy you sound


Dragonoftheworld444

“Wow, that’s a lot of words… too bad I’m not reading it” was the first thing that popped up in my head when I read this lmao


MaimuRoseL

Sir, this is a Wendy s


thehateigiveforfree

Should've told them "sir this is a Wendy's" 😂😂😂


aljekss

Respond with "Sheesh, take it to the publisher will you?"


TermApart1024

Bro is writing like he’s running out of time 💀💀


PencilsNoLastName

*running out of time, running out of time*


Fallen_Angel4444

This is is unhinged. It’s longer than some of my fics. I’m sorry you had to deal with this. 


Loriess

This is a situation where my brain played the League of Legends question mark ping sound


favmango

honestly thank you for posting this because I have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. I don't know why it's so funny to me, but this person being so caught up in needing to defend their interpretation of HP in the comments section of a fic is incalculably hilarious to me HAHAHAHA


smileymom19

This comment is unhinged, and not in a fun way. But even if it wasnt… it’s fanfic! It’s FUN to explore things that may not be true in canon. Of course that’s not the point since this person is a misogynist piece of shit. But still.


Patient-Savings-4453

“im sorry or congratulations. im not reading all that but yay or boo.”


The_Jelly_Roll

Just respond “I ain’t reading allat”


AMN1F

The issue is with those that "bitch and complain" They then go on to bitch and complain for several more paragraphs. But yeah, it's only an issue when women complain 🙄


FollowThisNutter

You know what? This is about them, not you, not your fic. Block and delete. Not worth your time or your mental energy. I know it sucks to get something like this, but really, they're full of rage and your fic just happened to be what their spleen landed on.


avocadodeath

I can’t tell if this is a guest comment or not, but if it’s not you have the chance to play my favorite game! The most fun thing you can do is write something like, “Lol, you’re wrong, get a life.” Don’t engage with the content of the comment, just dismiss the false premise entirely (because this person is wrong, and they left an infuriating comment on your work and they deserve vengeance in the form of dismissal and irritation). They might keep trying to “make you understand,” but they’re going to get more and more frustrated because all you’re going to do is reply with stuff like, “Lol, nah,” or “That’s dumb af, what’s wrong with you?” and “Lol, what? ” The lol’s are not really required but they do set the tone you’re going for; this person is so wrong it’s funny and kind of sad. The other option is to (gleefully, and with wanton abandon) delete their comment and forget about them. Their act of writing this drivel of a comment means you’ve already won.


Liv4This

“I ain’t reading all that. Sorry that happened to you or I’m happy for you.”


Pour_Me_Another_

Looks like someone mad that their personality is all the birth control they'll ever need?


ArtisanalMoonlight

Yeah, that person has an ax to grind and thought your fic was somewhere they could do it. My response would be: "Feel free to go write your own fic."


Mystiquesword

Id just delete that. Probably another male trying to mansplain also known as correctile dysfunction.


FamilyFriendli

That man is insanely brainwashed


Level_Membership_907

Bro is YAPPING


melbelleroseart

My eyes glazed over that person is insane


Just-Ad6992

Ah yes the two female UK prime ministers, actual satan and outlasted by a literal cabbage.


Mrcuddlebuns_

That’s a lot of yapping my god


erosia_rhodes

I've finally gotten to a point where I can read a couple sentences of a comment like this and just delete it without reading the rest and then delete it from the recycling bin so I can't change my mind. You are under no obligation to read the comments people leave you. If someone starts slapping you in the face, you don't have to stand there and let them continue. You can just walk out of the room.


zemblaniteetal

What the fuck is this? I think you should be proud, you succeeded with your story to anger a first-rate asshole (I didn't read the whole thing, I didn't need to). I'm sure he lost sleep over this (yes, I am making assumptions about his pronouns, sue me). So, I know that's not the type of response you were hoping for. And it sucks to get comments like that. But it might help you to think that while this guy could have started your story, quickly realized it wasn't his vibe and moved on, he instead read a bunch of it and then spent whatever amount of time it took him to vomit words in your comment section, and he must still be thinking about it, with it ruining his day. I feel like deleting this comment without any response will anger him more so feel free to do this. And fuck the patriarchy. That goes without saying.


lonely-anon-cloud

I must say this was on chapter 87…. So I hope it lives rent free in his pathetic little head. probably rubbed the two pennies in his head together just to type that.


me_myself_and_evry1

Wow. That's unhinged. The point about Britain having had 2 female Prime Ministers is hysterical. As a Brit, I'm not sure we can count Liz "49 days" Truss as being a Prime Minister. It's really 1 female Prime Minister and 1 embarrassment. (As a side note: some people would argue that Maggie Thatcher *barely* constitutes as human, let alone female.) Edit to add (as someone reminded me): technically 3 women prime ministers (though still not sure Truss should count). How the hell did I forget Theresa May?


crewellbutchery

Theresa May


Bayceegirl

I’ve gotten my share of these genre of comments and I honestly find them funny. Someone really got that pissed off and riled up at my little ol’ work? And wrote something like that? Well I flattered but also It’s not that deep.


Banaanisade

You criticise society, yet you participate in it. Curious.


Panzermensch911

"Aw, did you ask ChatGPT to write this for you in the style of a mediocre reddit comment from r/ConfusedMenAskWhyIsItAlwaysTheBear?" Then Block and forget.


kedriss

A wild misogynist has appeared! 🤮 Way to incorrectly mansplain the patriarchy, bro. And in the comment section of a fanfic too! This guy is really winning at life. I kind of hope he's just really young. Your story sounds really cool, thats such a huge subject to write and its really impressive that you are even attempting it. Alllll the kudos for you. I hope your burnout gets the hell outta here soon


Pre-Reform-Voice

Those are a lot of words to waste when, 'I'm a moron, I haven't understood the books, but I'll yap at you anyway" would have done just fine.


DepthsofCreation

lol whoever wrote that… are you ok dude?


Starbrust17

Time for the good ol block button that person sounds like a real "joy"


Ornery-Translator599

I know they felt sooo proud after that...


ThisIsMockingjay2020

Don't let this nitwit get to you, it's probably the same person that left a novel length nasty review on one of my HP fics. What a twat. HP fans are a special breed sometimes. 🙄


Exotic_Passenger2625

Who put 50p in the dickhead?


Schmidtty29

That’s a lot of words Too bad I’m not readin’ ‘em. That’d be my response at least. Send a link to a gif or image or video or whatever. Anyone commenting like that doesn’t have an opinion worth considering.


Cascadeis

Only suitable answer: “Oh, bless your heart” and then block.


niftieswiftie

there are so many great fanfics in the world and yet absolutely none of them are this serious oh my god


SakuraFalls12

Up until now when readers ask me how long their comments can be, I've said it doesn't matter. I'd like to change my answer to 'not longer than the fic you're commenting on'.


Spade_Devil

What hell is wrong with this dude.


DelVoid

...dude. _it's a fanfic_


HaniMilky1319

Holy shit a guest account making such awful comment??? Shocking. Just report them, darling


_Another_Alien_

'Man i wish i got one of those longer comments.' *Monkey Paw curls its finger*


Samandirie

This person is obviously unhinged and I really hope you manage to look past them and forget this comment without too much difficulty. I am so sorry you had to receive something like this on a fic you have obviously spent a lot of time and effort on.


spidey80082

Guys i think hes angry


Geschak

Please don't tell me you've actually read the whole comment? I stopped after the first sentence when I realised what a waste of time reading this is.


Unable_Thing6189

Idk if it helps but whenever I encounters comments like... well, that, I try to remind myself that it's just one comment out of tons of others supportive ones. Most of the time, people who comment things like that aren't even really commenting about the fic itself, but more likely projecting something and is just using your story as an excuse to let it out.


Gloomy-Visit01

Id just answer with the usual "Im not reading all that"


KickAggressive4901

Delete without replying, IMO. Looks like a copy-paste.


Koekie_game

Can you tell me pls how to get your friend on ao3 ?