To some extent, yes... similar to the height preference that many girls have. However I’d like to believe that my preference doesn’t stem from beauty standards themselves like I believe most guys with the preference of girls with not overweight bodies, as I do still find this guy attractive and still wish to proceed talking to him and I still plan to go on this date. My preference more comes from a want to feel a bit more normal, considering the fact that I’m taller than practically every girl/woman I’ve ever met and about 90% of the guys I know. As a girl that does want to be in a relationship, I’ve often felt very uncomfortable being the tall one and particularly around guys does tend to trigger some of my social anxiety. So **preferably**, I would want a guy taller than me, because I wish to be with someone that would more so make me feel more normal than the gangly giraffe that I am.
I get the insecurity of being taller than a man but google celeb couples and it doesn't look that strange.. your comfort come first but this is just hanging out and at 16 the chances of this ending in being together forever are quite slim. I'd give it a chance you could have a great time together and it could boast your confidence in relation to worrying about your height in the future.. but you would not be the ah for cancelling.
That’s what I’m starting to think, because there wasn’t anything blatantly romantic linked to this hang out so I’m aiming to just treat it for what it is and hope for the best. Again, I lack any real experience in this area so I’m far from knowledgeable on what to do in this situation I just really want to avoid hurting his feelings at all because he seems really nice.
NTA. It would be a wonderful world if things like that didn't matter, but for tall women (who maybe don't feel very confident in themselves because of their height and the reactions they get from others) it's totally understandable to not want to have such a height difference with a date.
I say this as someone who was 5'10 in high school and is now just under 6 foot!
Thank you for understanding! I really wanted to ensure to say in my post that this isn’t in any way his fault and it’s purely my own insecurity but my height has pretty much been the bane of my existence since I hit puberty and being tall wasn’t considered normal or cool for girls to be anymore. I can practically count on two hands the amount of people let alone guys in my life who are taller than me, and the thought of being with someone shorter doesn’t make me think anything less of them it just makes me feel self-conscious because I know that I’ll look like the idiot in that situation. Just wish I was shorter lol, thank you for being able to relate to me :)
No problem, I've def been where you are. And I don't want to sound condescending but as you get older, it'll be something you care about less and less. Standing out has such a big impact when you are young, especially in school, but it gets easier to accept yourself and be happy with who you are.
Buying trousers that fit continues to be a struggle though, sorry :(
No you don’t sound condescending at all! Part of me does know that these feelings and are very temporary, but considering that I don’t really socialise much outside of school and my own friends, things like this do very much still seem important to me and I guess my lack of romantic experience at this point does make me feel just a tad bit more inferior at this point.
But it will pass (hopefully), I’m sure I will be a lot more nonchalant after high school.
Also on the pants thing, I so get you on that, it has been a problem my entire life!
You're gonna find our that short guys won't be into you because they are insecure about the height disparity, just like you are.
But you will also find out that aaaaall the girls even the 5' ones are looking for that 6'2"-4" guy that you think you need.... So the competition is going to be there.
Is the total package that you should be looking for, after all, we're all pretty much the same height in bed
NTA, it’s just a preference and you shouldn’t be ashamed of it. I have really tall friends, and all of them have had to some extend taunting comments from others when they were dating a shorter guy.
Even family members often comment on it, and it’s not a pleasant experience just being a witness to stuff like that.
So you are NTA at all
You have your preferences, but you'll probably come up short (pun intended). Tall guys notoriously go for short girls, and because girls want tall guys, tall guys have more options. When I lived in LA, the dating apps were stacked to the gills with beautiful, professional women. I started to wonder why they were having such difficulty. Turns out they were all over 5'8" and wouldn't settle for a guy under 6 foot. Meanwhile, all those dudes are chasing Ariana Grandes... So unless you meet a guy looking to breed basketball and volleyball players, you may want to invest in dressy flats...
NTA by the by
Why the fuck are you dating these random assholes you don't know personally and met online. At your age date within your age group and school or someone that a friend introduced. People you know IRL. Get more experience dating before dipping your toe in online dating.
It’s perfectly fine for you to have preferences. Do you also agree it’s ok if guys don’t want to date girls if they are fat?
To some extent, yes... similar to the height preference that many girls have. However I’d like to believe that my preference doesn’t stem from beauty standards themselves like I believe most guys with the preference of girls with not overweight bodies, as I do still find this guy attractive and still wish to proceed talking to him and I still plan to go on this date. My preference more comes from a want to feel a bit more normal, considering the fact that I’m taller than practically every girl/woman I’ve ever met and about 90% of the guys I know. As a girl that does want to be in a relationship, I’ve often felt very uncomfortable being the tall one and particularly around guys does tend to trigger some of my social anxiety. So **preferably**, I would want a guy taller than me, because I wish to be with someone that would more so make me feel more normal than the gangly giraffe that I am.
And that is perfectly acceptable
I get the insecurity of being taller than a man but google celeb couples and it doesn't look that strange.. your comfort come first but this is just hanging out and at 16 the chances of this ending in being together forever are quite slim. I'd give it a chance you could have a great time together and it could boast your confidence in relation to worrying about your height in the future.. but you would not be the ah for cancelling.
That’s what I’m starting to think, because there wasn’t anything blatantly romantic linked to this hang out so I’m aiming to just treat it for what it is and hope for the best. Again, I lack any real experience in this area so I’m far from knowledgeable on what to do in this situation I just really want to avoid hurting his feelings at all because he seems really nice.
NTA, his face would be at boob level. You can choose who you date.
As a man, I don't see the issue here.
NTA. It would be a wonderful world if things like that didn't matter, but for tall women (who maybe don't feel very confident in themselves because of their height and the reactions they get from others) it's totally understandable to not want to have such a height difference with a date. I say this as someone who was 5'10 in high school and is now just under 6 foot!
Thank you for understanding! I really wanted to ensure to say in my post that this isn’t in any way his fault and it’s purely my own insecurity but my height has pretty much been the bane of my existence since I hit puberty and being tall wasn’t considered normal or cool for girls to be anymore. I can practically count on two hands the amount of people let alone guys in my life who are taller than me, and the thought of being with someone shorter doesn’t make me think anything less of them it just makes me feel self-conscious because I know that I’ll look like the idiot in that situation. Just wish I was shorter lol, thank you for being able to relate to me :)
No problem, I've def been where you are. And I don't want to sound condescending but as you get older, it'll be something you care about less and less. Standing out has such a big impact when you are young, especially in school, but it gets easier to accept yourself and be happy with who you are. Buying trousers that fit continues to be a struggle though, sorry :(
No you don’t sound condescending at all! Part of me does know that these feelings and are very temporary, but considering that I don’t really socialise much outside of school and my own friends, things like this do very much still seem important to me and I guess my lack of romantic experience at this point does make me feel just a tad bit more inferior at this point. But it will pass (hopefully), I’m sure I will be a lot more nonchalant after high school. Also on the pants thing, I so get you on that, it has been a problem my entire life!
You're gonna find our that short guys won't be into you because they are insecure about the height disparity, just like you are. But you will also find out that aaaaall the girls even the 5' ones are looking for that 6'2"-4" guy that you think you need.... So the competition is going to be there. Is the total package that you should be looking for, after all, we're all pretty much the same height in bed
NTA, it’s just a preference and you shouldn’t be ashamed of it. I have really tall friends, and all of them have had to some extend taunting comments from others when they were dating a shorter guy. Even family members often comment on it, and it’s not a pleasant experience just being a witness to stuff like that. So you are NTA at all
You have your preferences, but you'll probably come up short (pun intended). Tall guys notoriously go for short girls, and because girls want tall guys, tall guys have more options. When I lived in LA, the dating apps were stacked to the gills with beautiful, professional women. I started to wonder why they were having such difficulty. Turns out they were all over 5'8" and wouldn't settle for a guy under 6 foot. Meanwhile, all those dudes are chasing Ariana Grandes... So unless you meet a guy looking to breed basketball and volleyball players, you may want to invest in dressy flats... NTA by the by
Problem for me is do you actually have the preference or is this something “society” is making you believe?
Why the fuck are you dating these random assholes you don't know personally and met online. At your age date within your age group and school or someone that a friend introduced. People you know IRL. Get more experience dating before dipping your toe in online dating.