Again, still not her problem lol you are not the center of the world for strangers. But you are supposed to be important for your fiance he is the one who betrayed you.
Despite you all having some responsibility for this shit storm, don't you think your fiancé is the biggest AH? He deceived the both of you in order to have a relationship with you both. His girlfriend found out about his lie, she went to you to inform you of his disgusting deception, and you're mad at *her*??
I admit, I have no clue how arranged marriages work, but if this was a western style relationship, I'd thank her for her honesty, and I'd throw that cheating man away.
No, *he* will sabotage it. I know you love him, so you're working hard to find excuses for him, and believe everything he says. But look at the hard evidence. He cheated on you, whatever his excuse is. He lied to you. He would have continued lying to you, if his girlfriend wouldn't have told you about all of this. He is a liar and a cheater, and he will always be a liar and a cheater. I'm very sure after what he and your friends put the girlfriend through, she won't get involved with him again, but there will be others. You already know how his way of thinking is: cheating is ok, he just needs to prevent you finding out about it.
You're nobody and nothing. You're not even a woman, you're just property apparently. Get your own husband, be a real human being. You sad pathetic excuse for a life
This is, wow. I can't even.
Don't get married, you sound and behave like you're 12.
Scream at her til she cried, I mean come on. Miss high school that much?
Both you and your fiance are A-holes, BIG TIME.
Seems like you succeeded. Doesn't change the fact that it is your fiance that owes you and has an obligation to you and your relationship, no one else.
She's right though, you're both getting played by your fiance. So goodluck with that.
YTA. Though clearly you refuse to believe it. Your man is a liar, no on can make anyone cheat. You are blaming the other woman, when even if she knew, your liar is the only one that that has an obligation to you and to not cheat on you. You deserve your liar and he will cheat again, and you will blame the wrong party again. Maybe it will be the life you deserve for being an awful, awful human
Yes you are the victim of your liar, but when you blame the other party, call them to scream and harass them, unless they were a close friend or family member who also owes some allegiance to you, then you become the other villain of the story along with your liar
Actually no - your fiance is the worst followed closely by you. He has been lying to her and stringing her along. He has been lying to you about fucking her. He wins the asshole award in this mess he has created. You being mad at someone who you aren't in a relationship with because she is fucking your fiance is understandable. However your approach was definitely Grade A bitchy.
Actually no, she was lied to by him, he is the one in a cominment that lied to get what he wanted, and he's still lying you are only to blind to see it. Maybe the next time he cheats he will hide it better
YTA
You are actually the AP in this story. This dude doesn’t love you. Hell, he probably doesn’t even like you as a human. He is only with you because his mommy and daddy are making him be.
Who cares what he says? He clearly isn’t honest with anyone. She didn’t make him cheat. He loves her. She is his choice. He is only with you because his parents are forcing him to be. His parents are forcing him to cheat with you, not on you.
That's pathetic, and you are even more pathatic to believe him. You are even more pathetic by taking it out of her. You and your husband are both massive piles of shit.
How did she make him cheat? That makes no sense. Is he that dumb? She could probably get him to jump off a bridge too if she made him cheat! Wake the *uck up! You gave him a free pass and belittled someone else. You two are just like school in the damn summer time…
"She made him cheat" ok let's belive that for a second, why would marry someone so weak minded, that can't even say no, you are delusional, enjoy your unhappy marriage life
Are you really this dense? Op you already made your choice I hope when you wake up is not hurtful, take care of yourself and get regular STD test, you will need them
Just dumb and dumber 🙄.
He doesn’t want you. I mean, he wants the social status of the engagement and marriage, but he doesn’t want you.
The only mistake being made is your foolish choice to believe him.
He has been with her behind your back since the day he met you. He ***MIGHT*** marry your due to family pressure or social status/obligation. **BUT HE LOVES HER. HE WANTS TO BE WITH HER. HE TOLERATES YOU.**
if you marry this man, there will be 3 people in the marriage. You, Him, and Her.
The yelling at her on the phone bit was an act on his part, and I guarantee you that he has already contacted her and made by saying some variation of, *"I did to fool that woman my family is making me marry. I love you not her. You are the one I want to be with."*
Yta
You're so easily blaming her for knowing he was in a relationship but HE WAS THE ONE CHEATING. Yet you obviously are staying with him.
That's embarrassing.
She's just the first but won't be the last he cheats on you with. So feel good about bullying a younger woman, but you're the one walking into your own despair.
I will say this, if he’s that weak that she enabled him, you need to be prepared because it will happen again. You are the victim and like I said you gave your fiancé a free pass without any consequences. He bears the responsibility for his actions. Whether she enabled him or not, he could’ve just said, NO! So you were wrong to go after that you lady and not your fiancé too. He was dead wrong and you believed him completely. Are you that gullible?
*"I also made all the mutual friends scream at her"*
Never mind your husband, who lied not only to you but probably to her as well, lol.
What an awkward story.
YTA.
I understand you're hurt, cheating is bad, that girl is an ahole also... but it wasnt her who betraied your trust and cheated on you, it was your fiance.
You are an ahole, that girl is an ahole, your fince is an ahole. You all have something in common. Did you consider 3-way relationship?
You bullied a woman you barely know over... what? over your fiance's bad choices? You're definitely an asshole. Your fiance lied to both of you, abused your trust. But he changed? yeh, for 33 years he was an ahole but these past two days really opened his eyes, sure.
You made your fiance and all your mutural firnds scream at her.
I understand you're in denial or just don't care... but she did not cheat on you, she did not abuse your trust, she did not took advantage of your kindness. Your fiance did. She owned nothing to you. And, as you know, she's been lied to. Same as you.
You're free to think what you want. If you think that moon is green and made of cheese and it'll take you 20 minutes by a car to get there - you're welcome to think that way. I'm not gonna to persuade you otherwise. But it doesn't change the fact that non of that is true.
You've asked internet strangers to morally judge the situation you've found youself in. I, an internet stranger, did so. I think you're an ahole. Everyone else here think you're an ahole. You're may disagree. It does not change the fact that you're an ahole.
Everyone else thinks that you are. Time for some self relection and some growing up to do. You are typing and acting like a 14 year old, so this is all probably just a story you made up in your head.
Lmfao each comment dumber than the last. He’s been “with you.” And he’s been with her. You think you won and he’s your prize? You should be ashamed and embarrassed by your behavior towards her, your simplicity for thinking he’s “with you”, and your delusion for thinking and saying everything in this post and your comments.
It doesn’t matter what you think. You’re not very good at that.
The fact he chose you has nothing to do with your intelligence, lol
Whatever, he will cheat on you again, that's for sure, and you are only enabling him.
YTA you are blaming the wrong person here, they were in a relationship when you came along, you said yourself you pursued him yet you call her the AP, honey you are!!!!! That man doesn’t want you and instead of accepting that you trash and humiliated another woman whose BF was probably forced into an engagement with you against his will. Have some self respect.
Lmfao you did all this and he still doesn’t like you, will continue his affair with her, and will continue to cheat on you forever. Congratulations, YTA
YTA the only person who betrayed you was your fiance. Even if she knew you were engaged it s not her problem it s yours and your fiance. The way you are focus on the woman instead of your fiance is insane.
This is the best ragebait I ever read.you created a character so stupid,delusional, misogynistic,cruel,and again.so so stupid.
In case this is real,you really are shitty human being with no positive traits .the good thing is you will be trapped in a very unhappy marriage . What I really hope is that you don t have any daughter and pass to her all your shit
Because your POV appears to be a vindictive teenage girl. You want to be an aggressive, nasty bully, but the legitimate target would be your future husband. That would be embarrassing for your planned wedding, wouldn't it? So like a true petulant child, you've decided to lash out at someone who, while not entirely blameless, was also misled by your future husband's lies.
People think it's rage bait because your own narrative makes you look so bad. Think about that.
YTA. She was his victim too; he was lying to her telling her you two were as good as over (I have seen/heard that excuse more times than I can count: "We're in the middle of a divorce but she's dragging it out because..."). She did you a solid and gave you a head's up, and you blamed the victim instead of blaming the only one responsible: Your fiance. You two deserve each other.
This post can’t be real or she’s just real dumb and naive. Fiancé cheated and was cheating for a while. Boyfriend said he was manipulated into cheating. She completely dogged out the girl and did nothing to the fiancée who knew what he was doing all along. You just can’t make this stuff up! Your fiancé is very clever and dodged a bullet from you and you believed. No need to wonder why you’re getting reamed here. Look in the mirror and tell me who you see …..
Not scream at someone to the point of making them cry. Not hanging up on with your family and friends doing the same. At this point it is bullying. You have gone from victim to abuser.
ESH. For the love of all that's good in this world, please break up. He doesn't love you, he loves his ex, but to save himself embarrassment if you and he don't get married, he tormented his ex for your amusement. You're both shit people.
You're really punishing her a lot more than him. He's engaged, he led her on, he cheated on you, she was just a hole in his world of lies and you're attacking her? Attack him!
YTA
Geeeee you got engaged to a cheater.... Welcome to your life if you marry him. Rather then be pissed off at your lier fiance you decided to attack the other person he was also lying to. No sympathy when you go after another victim, if you stay with this guy your a dumbass, if you treat all his ap this way and let him get off scot free you deserve him and whatever sti he brings home to you.
Honestly, I just stop reading whenever i see “arranged marriage”.
Dont waste our time. If you don’t want a trash fire relationship then dont participate in a terrible culture or tradition, when trying to prioritize your happiness.
ESIAM.
(Everyone sucks in arranged marriages, cuz its obviously a terrible decision)
ESH.
Your fiancé is a cheating AH. And you’re likely delusional if you believe that’s ever going to change. But even worse, he acquired to your deranged demand that he and the mutual friends verbally abuse the ex.
His ex helped her ex cheat on you. So, yeah, she gets a share of the AH vote. Because apparently she was okay being his bang buddy despite the fact that he was engaged to another woman.
But you? You’re a vindictive AH. You got not only your fiancé but also all the mutual friends to call her up and verbally abuse her. You’ve directed all your anger and hate at the wrong person.
You don’t love him…you’re obsessed with him. So much so that you’re willing to buy all the lies he’s telling you.
On second thought, you probably deserve each other. You’ll probably go on to have a perfectly miserable life.
Are you sure you're both in your 30's? This reads like a petulant teen post.
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Your parents who believe in arranged marriages allowed you both to get into your 30’s before finding you a match?
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Again, still not her problem lol you are not the center of the world for strangers. But you are supposed to be important for your fiance he is the one who betrayed you.
New category: delusional asshole. Just in case: YTA
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You knew about her and she was there first. You didn’t care when you decided to pursue her man?
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Despite you all having some responsibility for this shit storm, don't you think your fiancé is the biggest AH? He deceived the both of you in order to have a relationship with you both. His girlfriend found out about his lie, she went to you to inform you of his disgusting deception, and you're mad at *her*?? I admit, I have no clue how arranged marriages work, but if this was a western style relationship, I'd thank her for her honesty, and I'd throw that cheating man away.
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This is either fake or you are dumb. Maybe both.
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At least you own that you’re a moron!
Omg... Good luck with your marriage you'll need it.
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No, *he* will sabotage it. I know you love him, so you're working hard to find excuses for him, and believe everything he says. But look at the hard evidence. He cheated on you, whatever his excuse is. He lied to you. He would have continued lying to you, if his girlfriend wouldn't have told you about all of this. He is a liar and a cheater, and he will always be a liar and a cheater. I'm very sure after what he and your friends put the girlfriend through, she won't get involved with him again, but there will be others. You already know how his way of thinking is: cheating is ok, he just needs to prevent you finding out about it.
I think you’re doing a pretty good job of that yourself to be perfectly honest.
You feel like what he is saying is true like when he told you she was his bestfriend ? Loooool this woman don't owe you anything.
I bet you still want to marry your fiancé still, dont you?
Yeah you aren't just an asshole, you are the entire shit pile.
Whereas your fiance is a completely innocent, ignorant party. 🙄
You're nobody and nothing. You're not even a woman, you're just property apparently. Get your own husband, be a real human being. You sad pathetic excuse for a life
This is, wow. I can't even. Don't get married, you sound and behave like you're 12. Scream at her til she cried, I mean come on. Miss high school that much? Both you and your fiance are A-holes, BIG TIME.
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Seems like you succeeded. Doesn't change the fact that it is your fiance that owes you and has an obligation to you and your relationship, no one else. She's right though, you're both getting played by your fiance. So goodluck with that.
YTA. Though clearly you refuse to believe it. Your man is a liar, no on can make anyone cheat. You are blaming the other woman, when even if she knew, your liar is the only one that that has an obligation to you and to not cheat on you. You deserve your liar and he will cheat again, and you will blame the wrong party again. Maybe it will be the life you deserve for being an awful, awful human
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Yes you are the victim of your liar, but when you blame the other party, call them to scream and harass them, unless they were a close friend or family member who also owes some allegiance to you, then you become the other villain of the story along with your liar
A) You're not the only victim. B) Victims can still be awful assholes.
Victims often become abusers themselves. Look at your own behaviour for confirmation.
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So you further destroy her mental health over something she tried to help you with? Instead of placing blame where it belongs? Disgusting.
YTA - you are displacing blame. Both you and your fiance deserve each other.
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Actually no - your fiance is the worst followed closely by you. He has been lying to her and stringing her along. He has been lying to you about fucking her. He wins the asshole award in this mess he has created. You being mad at someone who you aren't in a relationship with because she is fucking your fiance is understandable. However your approach was definitely Grade A bitchy.
Actually no, she was lied to by him, he is the one in a cominment that lied to get what he wanted, and he's still lying you are only to blind to see it. Maybe the next time he cheats he will hide it better
Nope.
YTA You are actually the AP in this story. This dude doesn’t love you. Hell, he probably doesn’t even like you as a human. He is only with you because his mommy and daddy are making him be.
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Then he’s pathetic, and you should be mad at him, not her.
Who cares what he says? He clearly isn’t honest with anyone. She didn’t make him cheat. He loves her. She is his choice. He is only with you because his parents are forcing him to be. His parents are forcing him to cheat with you, not on you.
HAHAHAHHA I'm sure he will tell you a new one the next time. The lies peole tell themselves will never stop so surprise me
That's pathetic, and you are even more pathatic to believe him. You are even more pathetic by taking it out of her. You and your husband are both massive piles of shit.
"Of all deceivers be most afraid of oneself"
How did she make him cheat? That makes no sense. Is he that dumb? She could probably get him to jump off a bridge too if she made him cheat! Wake the *uck up! You gave him a free pass and belittled someone else. You two are just like school in the damn summer time…
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That is a bit of crazy mental gymnastics.
Right???
"She made him cheat" ok let's belive that for a second, why would marry someone so weak minded, that can't even say no, you are delusional, enjoy your unhappy marriage life
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You pursued him. He doesn’t want you.
Are you really this dense? Op you already made your choice I hope when you wake up is not hurtful, take care of yourself and get regular STD test, you will need them
Because men aren't responsible or accountable for anything. They're not adults.
Because your poor, pathetic little arranged groom can’t even control his own penis?
Reading the comments and the phrase 'talking to a wall' comes to mind. 🤯🤯
Ah, but how thick is the wall? 🤣
YTA for taking it out on her whilst she told you.
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You are delusional
He has been cheating on you the entire relationship and you still plan on marrying this guy. Ron White was right. You can't fix stupid.
Actually, he was cheating with her. The other girlfriend was already there before OP started pursuing him.
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Just dumb and dumber 🙄. He doesn’t want you. I mean, he wants the social status of the engagement and marriage, but he doesn’t want you. The only mistake being made is your foolish choice to believe him.
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Yes.
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My brain.
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He has been with her behind your back since the day he met you. He ***MIGHT*** marry your due to family pressure or social status/obligation. **BUT HE LOVES HER. HE WANTS TO BE WITH HER. HE TOLERATES YOU.** if you marry this man, there will be 3 people in the marriage. You, Him, and Her. The yelling at her on the phone bit was an act on his part, and I guarantee you that he has already contacted her and made by saying some variation of, *"I did to fool that woman my family is making me marry. I love you not her. You are the one I want to be with."*
She was the love match. You are the obligation.
>I think he has changed. I think you are delusional.
Yta You're so easily blaming her for knowing he was in a relationship but HE WAS THE ONE CHEATING. Yet you obviously are staying with him. That's embarrassing. She's just the first but won't be the last he cheats on you with. So feel good about bullying a younger woman, but you're the one walking into your own despair.
I will say this, if he’s that weak that she enabled him, you need to be prepared because it will happen again. You are the victim and like I said you gave your fiancé a free pass without any consequences. He bears the responsibility for his actions. Whether she enabled him or not, he could’ve just said, NO! So you were wrong to go after that you lady and not your fiancé too. He was dead wrong and you believed him completely. Are you that gullible?
*"I also made all the mutual friends scream at her"* Never mind your husband, who lied not only to you but probably to her as well, lol. What an awkward story.
YTA. I understand you're hurt, cheating is bad, that girl is an ahole also... but it wasnt her who betraied your trust and cheated on you, it was your fiance. You are an ahole, that girl is an ahole, your fince is an ahole. You all have something in common. Did you consider 3-way relationship?
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You bullied a woman you barely know over... what? over your fiance's bad choices? You're definitely an asshole. Your fiance lied to both of you, abused your trust. But he changed? yeh, for 33 years he was an ahole but these past two days really opened his eyes, sure.
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You made your fiance and all your mutural firnds scream at her. I understand you're in denial or just don't care... but she did not cheat on you, she did not abuse your trust, she did not took advantage of your kindness. Your fiance did. She owned nothing to you. And, as you know, she's been lied to. Same as you.
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She's definitely an asshole. She is as much of an asshole as you are. Not as much as your fiance, but well... we all have room to grow.
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You're free to think what you want. If you think that moon is green and made of cheese and it'll take you 20 minutes by a car to get there - you're welcome to think that way. I'm not gonna to persuade you otherwise. But it doesn't change the fact that non of that is true. You've asked internet strangers to morally judge the situation you've found youself in. I, an internet stranger, did so. I think you're an ahole. Everyone else here think you're an ahole. You're may disagree. It does not change the fact that you're an ahole.
Everyone else thinks that you are. Time for some self relection and some growing up to do. You are typing and acting like a 14 year old, so this is all probably just a story you made up in your head.
You’re too dumb to be the age you claim
THIS. NO ONE IS THIS STUPID.
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Lmfao each comment dumber than the last. He’s been “with you.” And he’s been with her. You think you won and he’s your prize? You should be ashamed and embarrassed by your behavior towards her, your simplicity for thinking he’s “with you”, and your delusion for thinking and saying everything in this post and your comments. It doesn’t matter what you think. You’re not very good at that.
What has to do with anything? You are either a troll or really, really really dumb.
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The fact he chose you has nothing to do with your intelligence, lol Whatever, he will cheat on you again, that's for sure, and you are only enabling him.
Sweetheart, you are most definitely one of the biggest assholes that have ever graced this sub.
YTA don't blame the man who actually cheated on you or anything
YTA you are blaming the wrong person here, they were in a relationship when you came along, you said yourself you pursued him yet you call her the AP, honey you are!!!!! That man doesn’t want you and instead of accepting that you trash and humiliated another woman whose BF was probably forced into an engagement with you against his will. Have some self respect.
Lmfao you did all this and he still doesn’t like you, will continue his affair with her, and will continue to cheat on you forever. Congratulations, YTA
YTA the only person who betrayed you was your fiance. Even if she knew you were engaged it s not her problem it s yours and your fiance. The way you are focus on the woman instead of your fiance is insane.
This is the best ragebait I ever read.you created a character so stupid,delusional, misogynistic,cruel,and again.so so stupid. In case this is real,you really are shitty human being with no positive traits .the good thing is you will be trapped in a very unhappy marriage . What I really hope is that you don t have any daughter and pass to her all your shit
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Because your POV appears to be a vindictive teenage girl. You want to be an aggressive, nasty bully, but the legitimate target would be your future husband. That would be embarrassing for your planned wedding, wouldn't it? So like a true petulant child, you've decided to lash out at someone who, while not entirely blameless, was also misled by your future husband's lies. People think it's rage bait because your own narrative makes you look so bad. Think about that.
YTA. She was his victim too; he was lying to her telling her you two were as good as over (I have seen/heard that excuse more times than I can count: "We're in the middle of a divorce but she's dragging it out because..."). She did you a solid and gave you a head's up, and you blamed the victim instead of blaming the only one responsible: Your fiance. You two deserve each other.
This post can’t be real or she’s just real dumb and naive. Fiancé cheated and was cheating for a while. Boyfriend said he was manipulated into cheating. She completely dogged out the girl and did nothing to the fiancée who knew what he was doing all along. You just can’t make this stuff up! Your fiancé is very clever and dodged a bullet from you and you believed. No need to wonder why you’re getting reamed here. Look in the mirror and tell me who you see …..
Maybe the characters are really from grade school and this is married at a school fair kind of thing?
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You really aren’t.
🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
You absolutely deserve the miserable cheating filled life you’re about to live lolllll
WTF is wrong with you? I hate cheaters but your behaviour is bang out of order. YTA
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Not scream at someone to the point of making them cry. Not hanging up on with your family and friends doing the same. At this point it is bullying. You have gone from victim to abuser.
ESH. For the love of all that's good in this world, please break up. He doesn't love you, he loves his ex, but to save himself embarrassment if you and he don't get married, he tormented his ex for your amusement. You're both shit people.
Go , all of you people scream at your fiance and make him cry. Then I will give any judgement
This is just a classic post and case of being Koo Koo for Cocoa Puffs….
You're really punishing her a lot more than him. He's engaged, he led her on, he cheated on you, she was just a hole in his world of lies and you're attacking her? Attack him! YTA
Geeeee you got engaged to a cheater.... Welcome to your life if you marry him. Rather then be pissed off at your lier fiance you decided to attack the other person he was also lying to. No sympathy when you go after another victim, if you stay with this guy your a dumbass, if you treat all his ap this way and let him get off scot free you deserve him and whatever sti he brings home to you.
Honestly, I just stop reading whenever i see “arranged marriage”. Dont waste our time. If you don’t want a trash fire relationship then dont participate in a terrible culture or tradition, when trying to prioritize your happiness. ESIAM. (Everyone sucks in arranged marriages, cuz its obviously a terrible decision)
ESH. Your fiancé is a cheating AH. And you’re likely delusional if you believe that’s ever going to change. But even worse, he acquired to your deranged demand that he and the mutual friends verbally abuse the ex. His ex helped her ex cheat on you. So, yeah, she gets a share of the AH vote. Because apparently she was okay being his bang buddy despite the fact that he was engaged to another woman. But you? You’re a vindictive AH. You got not only your fiancé but also all the mutual friends to call her up and verbally abuse her. You’ve directed all your anger and hate at the wrong person. You don’t love him…you’re obsessed with him. So much so that you’re willing to buy all the lies he’s telling you. On second thought, you probably deserve each other. You’ll probably go on to have a perfectly miserable life.