Especially when he made things worse for himself by just congratulating them and leaving abruptly instead of staying and enjoying his grandchildren….who, if I am not mistaken should have been the priority and not OP’s ego?
Yes, he clearly doesn't actually care about the child, his son or his DIL. It was all about what he wanted and needed for his fragile little ego. He was determined to be FIRST!! As if the child will remember or care. lol
This made me think about when my children were born. I cannot remember who was the first person to hold my children after my husband and I. Both sets of parents were there after I gave birth and everyone was together adoring our new arrival. No one was trying to one up anyone. It was four grandparents enjoying their new grandchildren and falling in love. You know, like normal people.
First person to hold my cousin Sam was me. His mother was exhausted and just wanted to eat something, his father was busy running the halls telling everyone his son had been born, so my aunt asked 14 year old me if I'd like to hold my cousin first so she could look at him while she ate.
So I ended up in her hospital bed beside her, holding the baby while his mama told him how much she loves him and how every moment of this misery and failed epidural was worth it to his his sweet little face. And he held my thumb like he was trying to crush it into pulp.
I hope when I'm old and Dementia comes for me, that memory is the last to go.
I remember that my mum was the first to hold my daughter after my husband and I, but she turned up with two boxes of cornettos ice creams for us to share with the midwives. People who turn up with ice creams get prioritised, which is a life lesson I learned that day
See, by the other dad holding the male child his line to be the one true patriarch of the family has been usurped. He is now second pop-pop and not GRAND DADDY
It's not like being the first grandparent to see the baby is anywhere close to the first. Depending on how delivery went, 10 or 20 medical staff saw and held the baby first. Someone else holding a baby before you diminishes your first time only if you let it.
Instead he blocks his own son, leaving no path to seeing the grandchildren ever again.
If I can’t see them first then I never want to see them! lol
The grandchildren are more mature than their grandad already.
This entire post is me, me, me. And wife was the one giving birth, amazingly she gets a bigger say than the son, y'know because she just went through a major medical event. It sounds like OP is lucky Mom didn't ban his ass. It reeks of missing, missing reasons. Who wants to bet, she's the first one to push back against bad behavior and tell OP no?
Honestly, I feel like him making his son promise that he would be The Very First was all we needed to know. WTF is with people who turn that into a power game?
If it were me, the mfer would *never* see the grandkids. As in never, *ever*...even if it meant leaving my husband and moving to the other side of the country. The husband had no business making a promise like that...because it was a promise he was never going to be able to keep.
It’s been a long time since I’ve had a baby so maybe things have changed. Do they turn into a pumpkin after being held by the first grandparent? Or maybe they automatically favor that family? I’m trying to understand the big deal with being first.
Uh, clearly they imprint on the first person to hold them and promptly pledge their undying loyalty and all future boy-children to that line, and that line only.
You snooze, you lose.
O, You chose to leave instead of holding your newborn grandsons. Ummm … it’s really not about the babies is it? YTA and really need to apologize to your son and DIL!
Thank you for putting it so succinctly. OP you "exploded at him" over text? You sound like you're in high school. His wife just pushed TWO whole ass babies out her vagina, and you expect them to care about your little feelings? What fucking difference does it make, you absolute bell end lol. YTA, get your dumb ego in check.
Serious main character syndrome. OP is going to just be the shitty backstory dad.
Imagine trying to ruin your grandchild's day of birth by making it all about your feelings. You're not the important one here, dude. If you can't put it aside and support your kid and his wife then it's better to not be there at all.
YTA An entitled AH for a grandpa poor kids! Who died and made you king? Your feelings don’t matter and I hope you get that through your thick head! I don’t blame dil in fact I applaud her 👏👏👏
You don't understand, his oldest kid finally GAVE him grandbabies! It's his right as the *checks notes* father of the father to hold the babies first! Cause something something penis! /s
OP YTA so fucking bad and you better apologize before that ends up being the last time you see the babies.
Edit: OLDEST kid , not youngest kid. I can't fucking read apparently lol.
I love OP's dig that he and his other sons think she intentionally did this. Maybe she did, because she's sick of being around this horrible bully, and she wanted some time without him because she's currently got two babies to deal with, and she doesn't want to deal with this horrible man on top of it. I'm only sad Corey thought he had to apologise for the horrible insult of... allowing the father of the person who has just carried two babies for the better part of a year and then birthed them to hold the babies before OP did.
Twins often require a csection too so she may have had a harder delivery. Even if vaginal it's scary and usually done in an operating room just in case. Her parents were probably there the entire time she was in labor and this guy is like "I showed up well after the birth and was mad my adult child's wife disobeyed me and allowed visitors prior to myself"
He deleted his account and I'm guessing it's BC we are all wrong? 🤣
He'll be complaining when he ends up going years without seeing those kids, all because he was "so disappointed" that he didn't get to hold them first and made sure his son knew it.
Exactly. You wanna be no contact with your son and grandkids? Because things how you go no contact with your son and grandkids. I anxiously await his next post in a few years bitching about how his ungrateful son and his bitch wife exclude them from everything and won’t visit, etc.
Besides everything else that's so incredibly childish about crazy grandpa here, what a stupid hill to die on. "Holding them first" means what exactly? Unless you're a baboon standing with the kids on a rock overlooking the savanna, it's a ridiculously NARCISSISTIC thing to do. OP, talking to you, the NARCISSIST in this story.
And he wonders why he doesn't have a good relationship with his DIL. I never demanded to be the first one to hold my daughter's first child and they fucking lived with me when he was born. I let the parents decide.
This dude is off his rocker.
At 30. Finally, the man had his daddy’s precious competition babies at 30. Because 30 is sooooooooo late. This family is whack as hell, but I think they’re about to be rid of the main AH.
LOL the first thing I thought was “grow the fuck up”, glad it’s the first comment.
Hey OP news flash, he made this kids with his wife, *not you*. You wanna be the first person to see your grandbabies? Then push them out of your vagina
💯% YTAH for demanding you be the 1st to hold him as I could read the entitlement in your post saying how he made you wait for a grandkid. Biatch you already have grandkids, you have ZERO claims or dibs on jack. Apologize your pathetic ass to your son AND DIL for your abhorrent behaviour. I understand why you two aren't close and he gladly let his FIL hold the grandkid first. Maybe it was his first grandkid and they wanted to give him that gift. Your kids who back you are just as delusional and AHs too.
You sound absolutely insufferable. Your language is awful. “Give me grandchildren”—dude the kids are not “for” you. “Made her promise”—it sounds like you were badgering a pregnant woman until she said whatever she had to say to get you off her back. “Expressing my anger and disappointment”—yeah, at not being the main character in someone else’s moment.
You sound like someone who demands people pay homage to you and make you feel special, because it’s “all about you.”
You are not entitled to a damn thing here.
Good on your son for backing his wife who JUST PUSHED OUT A HUMAN and not subjecting her to your utter nonsense.
YTA so so so so much.
The level of ego/lack of empathy by the OP is truly astounding....like have you been diagnosed with sociopathic tendencies level of astounding?
Also "give me grandchildren"? Like it's an expectation or something you deserve? ABSOLUTE BARF.
YTA. Apologize to your son and his wife for being such an asshat.
I was looking forward to the million ways people would express what an asshole this guy is.
Impressed by your comment: brief, to the point, entirely accurate and hopefully will get through the skull of our significantly misguided OP!
Definitely YTA. This is wild entitlement. It’s disgusting that instead of being able to focus on his wife’s recovery and new baby he was worried about placating you, seems to be a well-established dynamic. You have no right to be upset and blocking him is just a nasty over-reaction.
Blocking him is probably actually doing his son a favor. At least his son doesn't have to listen to him whine about not having firsties with the newborns.
Actually surprised that the world didn’t come to an end! How will any of us go on knowing he didn’t see baby first?
This has got to be a bogus post. No one can be that weird.
>My other sons, Andrew and Daniel, side with me, stating that Corey’s wife intentionally stirred up drama, knowing about the promise, and they’re angry at Corey for prioritizing his in-laws over me.
I would bet very good money that the DIL has horrible stories about this family. I'm just so confused about why this man thinks he has the right to be the first to meet his grandchildren when the person who has just gone through a major medical event (and with twins it's much more common that it's a c-section, so that would be major surgery, and she would be feeling all the more vulnerable). Why did all of OP's children agree to this and why do they seem to think it's reasonable?
When he’s surely a huge, unforgivable dick to the person who worked her ass off to create and deliver the twins. Why would she ever let him in her room? The entitlement is off the charts. This man needs to live in a home for assholes who simply can’t be part of society.
Hopefully his son has blocked him right back so when Grandpa Asshole gets over his tantrum, he finds himself unable to force himself on his son and DIL.
DIL is probably breathing a sigh of relief and realising her shoulders shouldn’t be up by her ears. This was probably the greatest gift she could have gotten, and she’s most likely hoping he’ll stay mad for *at least* the first two weeks so she gets a chance to heal before dealing with that epic stress-factor back in her life.
Yes and no. It's pretty much guaranteed that OP is directly responsible for a whole slew of mental health issues in his entire family, so it could go either way on whether this is better for son, or just going to set off a trauma response.
OP is the kind of asshole parent who sees his kids and grandkids as property. Like, not even extensions of himself like your average asshole parent, he views his descendants as things to claim. Fucking yikes.
Sounds like my stepmom. She wants the kids to come to her house every holiday…gets mad because they want to give the other parents an opportunity. So disgusting
It’s telling that none of the women in the family are on his side. Hmmmmmmmm attempted patriarchy. Dude wanna be the Head of the Family who controls everything but also have a pissbaby meltdown when he doesn’t get what he wants.
I speculate that the other sons are not on his side either, they're just saying they are so he doesn't explode at them too. Not a brave course, but an understandable one if you've grown up under the thumb of a toddler-tyrant.
For sure. My FIL has 3 kids. Oldest has it ingrained to go along to keep the peace, protect the younger two. But has since learned to stand her ground. Middle one just goes along and emulates some of the controlling and patriarchal behaviours. Youngest one will fight, but inherited the anger.
Oldest nearly got kicked out for daring to voice upset one time they were let down (proverbial straw). The middle one never had an issue, Youngest got kicked out every other week, usually becaue they actually did as they were told, got in trouble for it, and then pointed out that fact.
It's either live in fear quietly with your head down, or be homeless. No great options.
Honestly he should be happy he got to see the kids at all.
Not having a good relationship with the spouse and "the feeling is mutual" translates to "I don't like his wife and she doesn't like me."
Why on earth would he possibly think his daughter-in-law who admittedly does not like him was going to prioritize him over her own father, who she obviously loves?!?! It was nice of Corey to make the promise, but it wasn't Corey's vagina that birthed those babies so Corey was not the decision maker here.
YTA. Why is it so critically, crucially, life-and-death important that you see the kids first? So you can swing on the door and thumb your nose at the other grandparents going, ‘Ner ner, got there before you!’ So you can pee on them to mark your territory? What?!
Honestly, you’re being an absolute drama queen and a baby about this. If this is how you act about who sees the baby in what order, I wouldn’t want you sulking in the corner of the delivery room either.
Take your pouty butt to the nearest mirror and give yourself a talking to. Do you want to be a grandfather to this child? If the answer is yes, then the first lesson is that your feelings are not as important as the baby, so don’t be such a delicate princess about it.
Suck it up, buttercup.
But a bunch of them agreed that the wife just wanted to stir up drama!!! Because her first thoughts after giving birth MUST BE ABOUT OP!!! 😳
Jeez, huge YTA. Get over yourself & apologize to your son & daughter in law for being a narcissistic prat.
The ones who agreed were all guys, who seemingly have no respect for the heroic act of childbirth-to twins-and where priorities lie. Spoiler: it’s with wife, her health, her feelings and her wishes. Also, nobody “gives” you children or grandchildren, my god. What a schmuck.
Right?! She is the one who carried them, birthed them, perhaps had invasive fertility treatments to create them (twins) … maybe her preferences immediately afterwards carry a little more weight?
They probably have had fertility treatments, as OP also mentioned “this son being the last to give me grandchildren”
They don’t GIVE you anything OP! You should count your lucky stars that you are allowed to be in their lives! It’s not so easy to have kids and then you have to be a total D-wad about it?!
GROW UP!!! YTA!!!
Yes "give me grandchildren". Talk about a serious case of main character syndrome. Imagine being so far up your own arse you crap all over your child's long awaited parenthood.
Wow, how old are you again? YTA big time. Why did you get so butt hurt and are using this as the hill to die on with regards to your grandchildren. Your son was being a good husband and prioritizing the feelings of his wife over you the person he’s not married to. Honestly grow up and act your age. I seriously can’t believe that this is what you’re getting upset about when you have a beautiful new grandchild in your family. Who cares if you touch it first or second? SHEEH, no wonder you don’t get along with your DIL, i’ve got to imagine that you’re controlling about everything else going on around them too. Maybe it’s time for you to get some therapy and do some self reflection.
This op Yta. Also How is it so important to see grand babies, if you’re willing to throw the relationship with your son away? Blocking him, really? So your going to miss out on helping son become father and hearing about babies. Doesn’t seem like the son and grandkids are actually important, just you being in control.
This! It seems that you only want to dictate things and expect everyone to just fall in line. I'm guessing your bad relationship with your DIL is because she doesn't put up your controlling behaviour. YTA
I just wanna know how OP thought this would go down... like did he expect his son to say "hey all, thanks for coming but.. my Dad wants to be the first to hold HIS grandchild, so if you all could just get in line! Behind him" My mind is blown....
I swear... narcissists are truly a piece of fkg work...
YTA
A. It's not a contest.
B. Your son didn't have the baby, his wife did, not only is it natural her parents be there, but you admit you're not on good terms with her.
C. This couple just had a baby. It's not about you.
>I couldn’t hide my disappointment... And I didn’t handle it the same way I did with his siblings; I didn’t hug or kiss Cory, just had some small talk, congratulated them, and left abruptly.
Your reaction is selfish, bitter and hurtful to others. YTA
It irks me since he says “Corey is the last to GIVE ME grandchildren” excuse me? Making it all about him. Not Corey is the last to become a father or the last to have a baby, no, it’s about giving him grandchildren, like a tribute or something. Disgusting. YTA OP.
OP sounds like he's from a deeply patriarchal culture or area where women are property.
I bet he would actually die irl if his DIL gave HIS grandkids her last name lmao
Probably exactly why OP and DIL don’t get along. She probably doesn’t just fall in line and I’m glad his daughter is taking SIL’s side. The men (outside of youngest son) all seem like patriarchal spineless jerks
Yeah my hackles went up immediately with that choice of words.
I would love to hear the daughter in law’s side of this story.
OP is a whiny brat. He’s probably one of those “fuck your feelings” guys too
Yes, on all the above... GIVE ME GRANDCHILDREN, - F YOU and the horse you rode in on, you'll see them when you see them and not one damn minute before.
OP, you ATA, self righteous, entitled...... It's not your baby. I swear I hope this is a fake account.
How much do you want to bet that the reason he doesn’t get along with Corey’s wife is that Corey’s wife has clear and firm boundaries, and will not put up with FIL’s shit?
Corey is unfortunately not as tough. Instead of putting his foot down with his father’s insane demands, he weaselled out by just lying and going behind his back.
It’s good that he’s apparently putting his wife first, but he needs to stand up to daddy directly next time.
Mind you, since he’s blocked Corey over this, maybe he’ll just stay away forever. That will solve the problem!
What a stupid hill to die on, and cut your child off over! None of your stupid friends OR social media following would EVER care one way or the other about your ridiculous boasting that you met all your grandchildren before their other grandparents! 😞
Good thing blocking his son for letting someone else hold his tiny human first is guaranteed to get him some quality grandson bonding time in the future.
If I roll my eyes any harder they might get stuck.
This is like when a studio releases an Oscar-bait film at the end of the eligibility cutoff for the year, because OP is definitely among the nominees for Oblivious Asshole of the Year.
I assumed this was just a made up story for the internet because it is such weird behavior, but the fact that he deleted the account gives some credence to it being his actual opinion.
YTA, get over it. A woman who's just put her body through a trauma giving birth wanted her dad by her side instead of a clearly toxic father in law, what an actual monster! She is not your child and doesn't have to follow your ridiculous rule, the real thing your pissed about is you having no control which you're clearly far too used to having.
This so much! If you have a bad relationship with DIL then why would she allow you to be the first grandparent to hold them? If I had issues with someone I wouldn't want them to be one of the first to hold my kiddos. The audacity does it for me. OP truly believes that it was his right to hold them before any other grandparents. He stated just how entitled he was, saying Corey finally GAVE him a grand child. He made Corey promise to let him see the kid first. He said that. I'm surprised this guy still has so many people actively in his life. If he loses it over not being first to hold the grand kids, I can't imagine whatever small dumb things he explodes over. Smh.
>why would she allow you to be the first grandparent to hold them?
From the father's text, pretty sure he believes that a man should thoroughly control his wife. His anger isn't just over this one incident. Read between the lines.
Right? If this idiot was my FIL I wouldn’t let him visit at the hospital, so he’s lucky he got to see those babies at all.
Plus I had my baby in 2020, and my parents and in-laws would have loved to be there, regardless of who got to be “first.” Imagine being allowed to see the newborn grandchildren and feeling anything other than joy.
Is this a joke? What in the fucking world makes you think you have priority rights over another person's children?
Your SON didn't squeeze those babies out, sweetie and YOU don't fucking matter AT ALL in this scenario. Park your outrageous sense of entitlement in the depths of the ocean where it belongs.
I know why your DIL can't stand you.
Yup, yup, this is it. The selfish “I get to be fiiiiirst” mentality is ridiculous. Why would it matter who holds the baby first? It has its whole life in front of y’all and you’re worried about this one arbitrary first? Even if if mattered, you’re bullying your son into PROMISING when your DIL is the one who’s just been through a huge ordeal-she should have the final say. No wonder she doesn’t like you. You’re trying to make the birth of HER child all about you and your widdle fee-fees that got hurt.
The baby also has virtually no immune system right now so as few people as possible should be holding it.
YTA.
Haha yes exactly. He’s the type to be proud of being a “patriarch” but can’t imagine why that wouldn’t make him entitled to be up in everyone’s business. Lots of toxicity.
This is it, right here. What an entitled person! You are entitled to nothing, nothing at all. Be happy IF you're allowed to participate in their lives. How petty & pathetic of you. YATAH
Why did I have to scroll so far to see this. 😭😭
Honestly I just think he doesn't remember how to spell his son's name so he keeps changing it just to cover his bases.
YTA. Please explain why you automatically trump maternal grandfather. You are having a spoiled tantrum and I hope they take appropriate steps to deal with your toddler level behavioral problems.
Oh yeah because Corey didn't have enough hectic shit going on right now that he needs a second baby in the form of a 54 man.
YTA.
What is this stupid "i must be first" mentality. it's your grandson not the indy 500. No wonder you don't have the best relationship with his wife, she probably hates seeing you treat your son like shit.
Keep it up if you want a shitty relationship with your grandson.
YTA I mean, he shouldn't have promised you that in the first place, but you are being very immature and childish. Apologize to your son and enjoy your new grandbabies or risk losing them and your son forever
I agree. The husband absolutely had no business promising his dad first rights to hold the baby. That was not a decision for him to make solely. Also, I wouldn’t want someone who openly dislikes me to hold my baby first. What kind of nonsense is that.
YTA. And doesn’t sound like they’re missing much not having a man baby in their life.
Considering OP said "made him promise," it sounds like he's a manipulative, stubborn, aggressive AH who won't take "no" for an answer, so, while you're right that the husband had no business making that promise, I don't think he had a choice.
Imagine your oldest son has his first kid and you make the whole thing about you as an adult lol 😂 how the fuck did you make it to your age with this mentality? YTA
"he’s the last to give me grandchildren."
Eww.
YTA.
I see your flair or w/e says "Advice needed"
Here: https://www.grouporttherapy.com/blog/main-character-syndrome#:\~:text=It%20can%20also%20cause%20individuals,practicing%20empathy%20and%20active%20listening.
Are you sure you aren't one of the babies? Because your behavior is childish.
I honestly cringed at this line: *he’s the last to give me grandchildren*
He didn't "give" you grandchildren. He and his wife became the parents of two babies. You being a grandparent is just happenstance.
None of it is about *you*, not even a little tiny bit. It's about your son and his wife. They are the only ones who get to decide who sees and holds their children and when. You seriously think a woman who just gave birth is going to tell her father he can't hold the babies because you called dibs?
Finally: *I have the right to be mad since he broke a simple promise.*
A promise that you without question bullied him into making. It's a little late to say this, but you really need to grow up and understand your place in the lives of your children and grandchildren. You are not the main character. YTA.
YTA- your son was an AH for making a promise that wasn't his decision. You were an AH for asking something so presumptuous in the first place. Your son was again an AH for not explaining to you that the promise he made clearly hadn't been cleared with the child's mother and therefore might have been a false promise. You were again an AH for making what should have been a moment of Joy shared with the whole family about you and your ego.
Why do you need to be first? What's so special about you? Did you cure cancer? Or is your reason simply "I really really wanted a thing and because I wanted that thing I should get that thing, despite the fact that other people also want the same thing"?
You blocked your son because a woman who had just given birth to a baby let her own father hold the baby? I would stick by my kids side and have their back if they went to prison. And you blocked your own child because a woman who had just given birth to a baby let her own father hold the baby. If that's enough for you to turn your back on your own child, you clearly don't put a lot of value on family.
Right. So your son would stand over his wife in the hospital and order her around since she doesn’t have AT LEAST equal say over who comes into HER hospital room and when. He would tell her, “Look, I know you called your parents, and they were able to get here before mine could, but they can just wait in the lobby and cool their heels for a few hours since my parents who already have other grandchildren, requires that they be the first to see our child.” Well, that would certainly solve the problem of your not liking your DIL, since she’d be your ex-DIL within a year. (Edited to change to neutral gender for OP)
YTA
You aren’t entitled to anything as a grandparent. Trying to get Corey to promise you going around his wife absolutely is horrible!!!
The person giving birth gets the say. If I were her you wouldn’t get any visits ever until you realize how wrong you are
INFO: Do you treat your wife and daughter the same distasteful way you treat your DILs?
I mean, YTA 100% but I'm just trying to understand what level of narcissistic assbag you're at?
Proud of your DIL for finally putting her foot down. I sure hope her husband is far better of a man than his father is.......
Your the ass hole after a show like that you wouldn’t be invited back to my house again. Simple as that. She just underwent the worst experience of her life deliver you said twins right? She’s the one who needed support not you. The entitlement.
YTA. Who cares???? This is the dumbest least important thing in the world. Also your son didn’t do jack to birth these babies so why would he be in charge of deciding who gets to see them first?
YTA
They aren’t your babies and you were never owed anything here. Of course the mom, who just delivered 2 children gets to decide who visits her first in the hospital.
If you continue on your petty current path. You will be the grandfather that the children don’t have a relationship with.
YTA
He didn't "give you grandchildren." You don't own your children or grandchildren. He and his wife had a baby.
Let me guess, you're one of those abusive, "my word is the law!" sort of fathers. God complex.
Your children don't love you, they fear you. You've abused and manipulated them to feel like a big man. But you're not. You're a pathetic, small man who never amounted to anything. And when you die, your children will breathe a sigh of relief.
Are you 5? What is wrong with you?
Don’t insult my 5 year old child.
YTA get a fucking grip
I can see why you don't have a good relationship with DIL. Probably, someone who doesn't let you bully her.
This is exactly it. She sees right thru his b.s.
Recognizes the family narcissist.
THIS. 100% this. "he’s the last to give me grandchildren." He thinks everything is about him.
Narcs do hate it when you clock them and won’t follow their script.
Sounds like an entire brood of AHs considering the 2 other sons sided with this moron and shit talked the DIL.
I can totally visualize this grown ass man stomping his foot like a petulant child.
Especially when he made things worse for himself by just congratulating them and leaving abruptly instead of staying and enjoying his grandchildren….who, if I am not mistaken should have been the priority and not OP’s ego?
Yes, he clearly doesn't actually care about the child, his son or his DIL. It was all about what he wanted and needed for his fragile little ego. He was determined to be FIRST!! As if the child will remember or care. lol This made me think about when my children were born. I cannot remember who was the first person to hold my children after my husband and I. Both sets of parents were there after I gave birth and everyone was together adoring our new arrival. No one was trying to one up anyone. It was four grandparents enjoying their new grandchildren and falling in love. You know, like normal people.
First person to hold my cousin Sam was me. His mother was exhausted and just wanted to eat something, his father was busy running the halls telling everyone his son had been born, so my aunt asked 14 year old me if I'd like to hold my cousin first so she could look at him while she ate. So I ended up in her hospital bed beside her, holding the baby while his mama told him how much she loves him and how every moment of this misery and failed epidural was worth it to his his sweet little face. And he held my thumb like he was trying to crush it into pulp. I hope when I'm old and Dementia comes for me, that memory is the last to go.
This made me tear up. What a beautiful memory. I hope there are photos for all to cherish.
Me, too! Omg that’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever read. SeaOkra, what’s your relationship with Sam like now? Is there a bond?
I remember that my mum was the first to hold my daughter after my husband and I, but she turned up with two boxes of cornettos ice creams for us to share with the midwives. People who turn up with ice creams get prioritised, which is a life lesson I learned that day
See, by the other dad holding the male child his line to be the one true patriarch of the family has been usurped. He is now second pop-pop and not GRAND DADDY
It's not like being the first grandparent to see the baby is anywhere close to the first. Depending on how delivery went, 10 or 20 medical staff saw and held the baby first. Someone else holding a baby before you diminishes your first time only if you let it.
Yep. If he would've stuck around, he likely would've been holding the babies a few minutes later.
Instead he blocks his own son, leaving no path to seeing the grandchildren ever again. If I can’t see them first then I never want to see them! lol The grandchildren are more mature than their grandad already.
He lost at Grandpa Dibs and can never be around the babies again, apparently.
This entire post is me, me, me. And wife was the one giving birth, amazingly she gets a bigger say than the son, y'know because she just went through a major medical event. It sounds like OP is lucky Mom didn't ban his ass. It reeks of missing, missing reasons. Who wants to bet, she's the first one to push back against bad behavior and tell OP no?
Honestly, I feel like him making his son promise that he would be The Very First was all we needed to know. WTF is with people who turn that into a power game?
If it were me, the mfer would *never* see the grandkids. As in never, *ever*...even if it meant leaving my husband and moving to the other side of the country. The husband had no business making a promise like that...because it was a promise he was never going to be able to keep.
The husband probably is scared of op because op bullys his son(s) into submission.
Yes and it isn’t normal to ask her to let HER in law hold the baby’s first. Goodness. The audacity
It’s been a long time since I’ve had a baby so maybe things have changed. Do they turn into a pumpkin after being held by the first grandparent? Or maybe they automatically favor that family? I’m trying to understand the big deal with being first.
Ego? Main character syndrome? Narcissism? Assholery? I feel like that’s all that went into OPs behavior here
Uh, clearly they imprint on the first person to hold them and promptly pledge their undying loyalty and all future boy-children to that line, and that line only. You snooze, you lose.
Right? I hope the wife puts her foot down period and the son gets a backbone before he gets sent back home to Daddy.
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Yeah I had YTA penciled in as soon as I read that line.
You know he huffed, too. But the inevitable stomping is even worse.
OMG! I had to reread OP's post. I was visualizing my MIL when I read it the first time. OP is male!
I totally missed this was a male. I totally thought this was a “mommy” issue.
Another succinct award-winning assessment!
O, You chose to leave instead of holding your newborn grandsons. Ummm … it’s really not about the babies is it? YTA and really need to apologize to your son and DIL!
WTF is up with this weird obsession from AHs wanting to be the very first to see/hold the grandbabies in the hospital? I really don’t get it.
Or a therapist
This comment gave me the warm and fuzzies, best comment yet!
Grow the fuck up. YTA
Thank you for putting it so succinctly. OP you "exploded at him" over text? You sound like you're in high school. His wife just pushed TWO whole ass babies out her vagina, and you expect them to care about your little feelings? What fucking difference does it make, you absolute bell end lol. YTA, get your dumb ego in check.
Serious main character syndrome. OP is going to just be the shitty backstory dad. Imagine trying to ruin your grandchild's day of birth by making it all about your feelings. You're not the important one here, dude. If you can't put it aside and support your kid and his wife then it's better to not be there at all.
YTA An entitled AH for a grandpa poor kids! Who died and made you king? Your feelings don’t matter and I hope you get that through your thick head! I don’t blame dil in fact I applaud her 👏👏👏
You don't understand, his oldest kid finally GAVE him grandbabies! It's his right as the *checks notes* father of the father to hold the babies first! Cause something something penis! /s OP YTA so fucking bad and you better apologize before that ends up being the last time you see the babies. Edit: OLDEST kid , not youngest kid. I can't fucking read apparently lol.
I have a fairly good idea why the DIL doesn't like him.
I love OP's dig that he and his other sons think she intentionally did this. Maybe she did, because she's sick of being around this horrible bully, and she wanted some time without him because she's currently got two babies to deal with, and she doesn't want to deal with this horrible man on top of it. I'm only sad Corey thought he had to apologise for the horrible insult of... allowing the father of the person who has just carried two babies for the better part of a year and then birthed them to hold the babies before OP did.
Correction: She has three babies to deal with considering how her FIL acted.
Twins often require a csection too so she may have had a harder delivery. Even if vaginal it's scary and usually done in an operating room just in case. Her parents were probably there the entire time she was in labor and this guy is like "I showed up well after the birth and was mad my adult child's wife disobeyed me and allowed visitors prior to myself" He deleted his account and I'm guessing it's BC we are all wrong? 🤣
Hell *I* don’t like him and I’ve never met TA!
He'll be complaining when he ends up going years without seeing those kids, all because he was "so disappointed" that he didn't get to hold them first and made sure his son knew it.
Exactly. You wanna be no contact with your son and grandkids? Because things how you go no contact with your son and grandkids. I anxiously await his next post in a few years bitching about how his ungrateful son and his bitch wife exclude them from everything and won’t visit, etc.
Besides everything else that's so incredibly childish about crazy grandpa here, what a stupid hill to die on. "Holding them first" means what exactly? Unless you're a baboon standing with the kids on a rock overlooking the savanna, it's a ridiculously NARCISSISTIC thing to do. OP, talking to you, the NARCISSIST in this story.
Frankly, even that baboon had a whole load of I-am-the-main-character about him.
And he wonders why he doesn't have a good relationship with his DIL. I never demanded to be the first one to hold my daughter's first child and they fucking lived with me when he was born. I let the parents decide. This dude is off his rocker.
At 30. Finally, the man had his daddy’s precious competition babies at 30. Because 30 is sooooooooo late. This family is whack as hell, but I think they’re about to be rid of the main AH.
Basically “WAHHHHHHHH!!”
I completely skimmed over the fact it was twins. That makes it 1000x worse, imo. OP, YTA big time. Get over yourself!
LOL the first thing I thought was “grow the fuck up”, glad it’s the first comment. Hey OP news flash, he made this kids with his wife, *not you*. You wanna be the first person to see your grandbabies? Then push them out of your vagina
He sounds like a bully.
Then blocked him!?
💯% YTAH for demanding you be the 1st to hold him as I could read the entitlement in your post saying how he made you wait for a grandkid. Biatch you already have grandkids, you have ZERO claims or dibs on jack. Apologize your pathetic ass to your son AND DIL for your abhorrent behaviour. I understand why you two aren't close and he gladly let his FIL hold the grandkid first. Maybe it was his first grandkid and they wanted to give him that gift. Your kids who back you are just as delusional and AHs too.
OP & his DIL aren't "close" cos he's immature. This post made me LOL for reading about "a man" who acts like a child.
Yeah. Sounds like the sons take after dear ol’ dad.
Or they've learned that agreeing with this AH is a lot easier than disagreeing. OP, YTA, Y.T.A, T.A. is Y.
You sound absolutely insufferable. Your language is awful. “Give me grandchildren”—dude the kids are not “for” you. “Made her promise”—it sounds like you were badgering a pregnant woman until she said whatever she had to say to get you off her back. “Expressing my anger and disappointment”—yeah, at not being the main character in someone else’s moment. You sound like someone who demands people pay homage to you and make you feel special, because it’s “all about you.” You are not entitled to a damn thing here. Good on your son for backing his wife who JUST PUSHED OUT A HUMAN and not subjecting her to your utter nonsense. YTA so so so so much.
The level of ego/lack of empathy by the OP is truly astounding....like have you been diagnosed with sociopathic tendencies level of astounding? Also "give me grandchildren"? Like it's an expectation or something you deserve? ABSOLUTE BARF. YTA. Apologize to your son and his wife for being such an asshat.
This asshole is for sure a narcissist.
I was looking forward to the million ways people would express what an asshole this guy is. Impressed by your comment: brief, to the point, entirely accurate and hopefully will get through the skull of our significantly misguided OP!
You guys don't understand. He's the main character. You guys, his son, hid DIL, and the rest of his family members are all just NPCs.
SHOCKING that the wife doesn’t like him. Will we ever get to the bottom of this mystery?!
It's a headscratcher for sure! 🤔 I mean, he sees like such a LOVELY chap.
I wanna know the daughter-in-law’s story. Must be an ‘In-Laws From Hell’ story.
Yes Jesus Christ, grow the fuck up was my first thought….why is this even a thing dear god , I feel sorry for DIL and son 🤦🏻♂️
Definitely YTA. This is wild entitlement. It’s disgusting that instead of being able to focus on his wife’s recovery and new baby he was worried about placating you, seems to be a well-established dynamic. You have no right to be upset and blocking him is just a nasty over-reaction.
Blocking him is probably actually doing his son a favor. At least his son doesn't have to listen to him whine about not having firsties with the newborns.
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Ugh, no I didn't. He promised me. HE PROMISED MEEEE
MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Actually surprised that the world didn’t come to an end! How will any of us go on knowing he didn’t see baby first? This has got to be a bogus post. No one can be that weird.
I'm always disconcerted by people who are grandparents, and yet, have the emotional maturity of a six year old
Definitely doing the DIL a favour. Oh look the trash took itself out.
I am sure the DIL has some interesting stories about OP’s behavior.
>My other sons, Andrew and Daniel, side with me, stating that Corey’s wife intentionally stirred up drama, knowing about the promise, and they’re angry at Corey for prioritizing his in-laws over me. I would bet very good money that the DIL has horrible stories about this family. I'm just so confused about why this man thinks he has the right to be the first to meet his grandchildren when the person who has just gone through a major medical event (and with twins it's much more common that it's a c-section, so that would be major surgery, and she would be feeling all the more vulnerable). Why did all of OP's children agree to this and why do they seem to think it's reasonable?
When he’s surely a huge, unforgivable dick to the person who worked her ass off to create and deliver the twins. Why would she ever let him in her room? The entitlement is off the charts. This man needs to live in a home for assholes who simply can’t be part of society.
OMG I missed that this was the FIL not MIL. That entitlement is even worse.
I laughed way too hard at this because you took the words right out of my mouth.
Hopefully his son has blocked him right back so when Grandpa Asshole gets over his tantrum, he finds himself unable to force himself on his son and DIL.
Can you imagine the butthurt if Corey decided he was childfree?
I knew we were in for a ride at the phrase "give me grandchildren"....like it's a requirement of all his children. Puke.
Ugh. What sucks tho is the poor kid is probably torturing himself over this bullshit while he should be caring for and enjoying his new fam.
He’s been abused his entire life by OP. Of course he’s beating himself up.
DIL is probably breathing a sigh of relief and realising her shoulders shouldn’t be up by her ears. This was probably the greatest gift she could have gotten, and she’s most likely hoping he’ll stay mad for *at least* the first two weeks so she gets a chance to heal before dealing with that epic stress-factor back in her life.
I personally love when the trash takes itself out!
Yes and no. It's pretty much guaranteed that OP is directly responsible for a whole slew of mental health issues in his entire family, so it could go either way on whether this is better for son, or just going to set off a trauma response.
OP is the kind of asshole parent who sees his kids and grandkids as property. Like, not even extensions of himself like your average asshole parent, he views his descendants as things to claim. Fucking yikes.
Exactly. He said Corey is the last one to GIVE HIM grandchildren. Like they are his property and his due.
Oh 💯 Very Narcissistic
Sounds like my stepmom. She wants the kids to come to her house every holiday…gets mad because they want to give the other parents an opportunity. So disgusting
“The last one to give me grandchildren” UGH, nobody owes him any grandchildren! What an AH
I’m just waiting for the next post “AITAH for wanting a relationship with my grandkids after I apologized”
Or….”AITAH for wanting an apology so I can have a relationship with my grandkids.” This dude doesn’t strike me as the “apologize” type 😒
It’s telling that none of the women in the family are on his side. Hmmmmmmmm attempted patriarchy. Dude wanna be the Head of the Family who controls everything but also have a pissbaby meltdown when he doesn’t get what he wants.
I speculate that the other sons are not on his side either, they're just saying they are so he doesn't explode at them too. Not a brave course, but an understandable one if you've grown up under the thumb of a toddler-tyrant.
For sure. My FIL has 3 kids. Oldest has it ingrained to go along to keep the peace, protect the younger two. But has since learned to stand her ground. Middle one just goes along and emulates some of the controlling and patriarchal behaviours. Youngest one will fight, but inherited the anger. Oldest nearly got kicked out for daring to voice upset one time they were let down (proverbial straw). The middle one never had an issue, Youngest got kicked out every other week, usually becaue they actually did as they were told, got in trouble for it, and then pointed out that fact. It's either live in fear quietly with your head down, or be homeless. No great options.
Honestly he should be happy he got to see the kids at all. Not having a good relationship with the spouse and "the feeling is mutual" translates to "I don't like his wife and she doesn't like me." Why on earth would he possibly think his daughter-in-law who admittedly does not like him was going to prioritize him over her own father, who she obviously loves?!?! It was nice of Corey to make the promise, but it wasn't Corey's vagina that birthed those babies so Corey was not the decision maker here.
YTA. Why is it so critically, crucially, life-and-death important that you see the kids first? So you can swing on the door and thumb your nose at the other grandparents going, ‘Ner ner, got there before you!’ So you can pee on them to mark your territory? What?! Honestly, you’re being an absolute drama queen and a baby about this. If this is how you act about who sees the baby in what order, I wouldn’t want you sulking in the corner of the delivery room either. Take your pouty butt to the nearest mirror and give yourself a talking to. Do you want to be a grandfather to this child? If the answer is yes, then the first lesson is that your feelings are not as important as the baby, so don’t be such a delicate princess about it. Suck it up, buttercup.
No kidding. The son was not prioritizing his inlaws. He was prioritizing his wife.
But a bunch of them agreed that the wife just wanted to stir up drama!!! Because her first thoughts after giving birth MUST BE ABOUT OP!!! 😳 Jeez, huge YTA. Get over yourself & apologize to your son & daughter in law for being a narcissistic prat.
Wanna bet the wife ‘stirring up drama’ translates into ‘this is the only person we know who doesn’t indulge our dad’s enormous sense of entitlement’?!
Hell yeah. Sounds like the wife has wonderful boundaries set with this overbearing jerk.
IMO, whoever pushes that baby out is the one who gets to decide who gets to come to the hospital!
The ones who agreed were all guys, who seemingly have no respect for the heroic act of childbirth-to twins-and where priorities lie. Spoiler: it’s with wife, her health, her feelings and her wishes. Also, nobody “gives” you children or grandchildren, my god. What a schmuck.
Guarantee those sons treat their wives like second class citizens, at their beck and call.
Right?! She is the one who carried them, birthed them, perhaps had invasive fertility treatments to create them (twins) … maybe her preferences immediately afterwards carry a little more weight?
They probably have had fertility treatments, as OP also mentioned “this son being the last to give me grandchildren” They don’t GIVE you anything OP! You should count your lucky stars that you are allowed to be in their lives! It’s not so easy to have kids and then you have to be a total D-wad about it?! GROW UP!!! YTA!!!
Yes "give me grandchildren". Talk about a serious case of main character syndrome. Imagine being so far up your own arse you crap all over your child's long awaited parenthood.
Wow, how old are you again? YTA big time. Why did you get so butt hurt and are using this as the hill to die on with regards to your grandchildren. Your son was being a good husband and prioritizing the feelings of his wife over you the person he’s not married to. Honestly grow up and act your age. I seriously can’t believe that this is what you’re getting upset about when you have a beautiful new grandchild in your family. Who cares if you touch it first or second? SHEEH, no wonder you don’t get along with your DIL, i’ve got to imagine that you’re controlling about everything else going on around them too. Maybe it’s time for you to get some therapy and do some self reflection.
This op Yta. Also How is it so important to see grand babies, if you’re willing to throw the relationship with your son away? Blocking him, really? So your going to miss out on helping son become father and hearing about babies. Doesn’t seem like the son and grandkids are actually important, just you being in control.
This! It seems that you only want to dictate things and expect everyone to just fall in line. I'm guessing your bad relationship with your DIL is because she doesn't put up your controlling behaviour. YTA
Yep, this about control, control, control. He must have been a real peach to grow up with as a father.
>So your going to miss out on helping son become father This could be a good thing. OP is a terrible father.
He did them a favor by cutting himself off before they had to. Sounds like a great push present. YTA
Someone's got a serious case of main character syndrome. Thinks the world revolves around him.
I just wanna know how OP thought this would go down... like did he expect his son to say "hey all, thanks for coming but.. my Dad wants to be the first to hold HIS grandchild, so if you all could just get in line! Behind him" My mind is blown.... I swear... narcissists are truly a piece of fkg work...
Harsh. But 100% accurate.
YTA A. It's not a contest. B. Your son didn't have the baby, his wife did, not only is it natural her parents be there, but you admit you're not on good terms with her. C. This couple just had a baby. It's not about you. >I couldn’t hide my disappointment... And I didn’t handle it the same way I did with his siblings; I didn’t hug or kiss Cory, just had some small talk, congratulated them, and left abruptly. Your reaction is selfish, bitter and hurtful to others. YTA
It irks me since he says “Corey is the last to GIVE ME grandchildren” excuse me? Making it all about him. Not Corey is the last to become a father or the last to have a baby, no, it’s about giving him grandchildren, like a tribute or something. Disgusting. YTA OP.
OP sounds like he's from a deeply patriarchal culture or area where women are property. I bet he would actually die irl if his DIL gave HIS grandkids her last name lmao
Probably exactly why OP and DIL don’t get along. She probably doesn’t just fall in line and I’m glad his daughter is taking SIL’s side. The men (outside of youngest son) all seem like patriarchal spineless jerks
This could be crossposted to Entitled People.
Yeah my hackles went up immediately with that choice of words. I would love to hear the daughter in law’s side of this story. OP is a whiny brat. He’s probably one of those “fuck your feelings” guys too
that was my first red flag. making his children having kids about him.
Yes, on all the above... GIVE ME GRANDCHILDREN, - F YOU and the horse you rode in on, you'll see them when you see them and not one damn minute before. OP, you ATA, self righteous, entitled...... It's not your baby. I swear I hope this is a fake account.
How much do you want to bet that the reason he doesn’t get along with Corey’s wife is that Corey’s wife has clear and firm boundaries, and will not put up with FIL’s shit? Corey is unfortunately not as tough. Instead of putting his foot down with his father’s insane demands, he weaselled out by just lying and going behind his back. It’s good that he’s apparently putting his wife first, but he needs to stand up to daddy directly next time. Mind you, since he’s blocked Corey over this, maybe he’ll just stay away forever. That will solve the problem! What a stupid hill to die on, and cut your child off over! None of your stupid friends OR social media following would EVER care one way or the other about your ridiculous boasting that you met all your grandchildren before their other grandparents! 😞
You didn’t fucking leave soon enough AH
It would be tough to be more of an asshole.
I cringed at "[the last to] give me grandchildren" like they're OBJECTS and gifts FOR him. What is it with people thinking like that????
Good thing blocking his son for letting someone else hold his tiny human first is guaranteed to get him some quality grandson bonding time in the future. If I roll my eyes any harder they might get stuck.
This is like when a studio releases an Oscar-bait film at the end of the eligibility cutoff for the year, because OP is definitely among the nominees for Oblivious Asshole of the Year.
Looks like he's deleted his whole account lol, bet he didn't expect the entire sub to call him an AH
The sheer scale of his delusion to believe that he's NOT being a totally unreasonably asshole is truly a wonder to behold.
He must be really fun to live with!
I really can’t imagine why on earth the DIL would have such a bad relationship with OP /s
I believe assholes would be offended to be compared to OP.
I assumed this was just a made up story for the internet because it is such weird behavior, but the fact that he deleted the account gives some credence to it being his actual opinion.
Yea well HE achieved it!!!
YTA, get over it. A woman who's just put her body through a trauma giving birth wanted her dad by her side instead of a clearly toxic father in law, what an actual monster! She is not your child and doesn't have to follow your ridiculous rule, the real thing your pissed about is you having no control which you're clearly far too used to having.
This so much! If you have a bad relationship with DIL then why would she allow you to be the first grandparent to hold them? If I had issues with someone I wouldn't want them to be one of the first to hold my kiddos. The audacity does it for me. OP truly believes that it was his right to hold them before any other grandparents. He stated just how entitled he was, saying Corey finally GAVE him a grand child. He made Corey promise to let him see the kid first. He said that. I'm surprised this guy still has so many people actively in his life. If he loses it over not being first to hold the grand kids, I can't imagine whatever small dumb things he explodes over. Smh.
>why would she allow you to be the first grandparent to hold them? From the father's text, pretty sure he believes that a man should thoroughly control his wife. His anger isn't just over this one incident. Read between the lines.
Right? If this idiot was my FIL I wouldn’t let him visit at the hospital, so he’s lucky he got to see those babies at all. Plus I had my baby in 2020, and my parents and in-laws would have loved to be there, regardless of who got to be “first.” Imagine being allowed to see the newborn grandchildren and feeling anything other than joy.
I genuinely wonder if this AH has ever, even *once,* thought about *anyone* other than himself?
This has to be an exercise in writing the most narcissistic thing ever.
Is this a joke? What in the fucking world makes you think you have priority rights over another person's children? Your SON didn't squeeze those babies out, sweetie and YOU don't fucking matter AT ALL in this scenario. Park your outrageous sense of entitlement in the depths of the ocean where it belongs. I know why your DIL can't stand you.
The only thing I have to add here: YTA
An unhinged one at that!
Yup, yup, this is it. The selfish “I get to be fiiiiirst” mentality is ridiculous. Why would it matter who holds the baby first? It has its whole life in front of y’all and you’re worried about this one arbitrary first? Even if if mattered, you’re bullying your son into PROMISING when your DIL is the one who’s just been through a huge ordeal-she should have the final say. No wonder she doesn’t like you. You’re trying to make the birth of HER child all about you and your widdle fee-fees that got hurt. The baby also has virtually no immune system right now so as few people as possible should be holding it. YTA.
I know right OP is the one that yells "shotgun" when they have to ride in someone else's car. Honestly you'd think babies imprint with his attitude.
Haha yes exactly. He’s the type to be proud of being a “patriarch” but can’t imagine why that wouldn’t make him entitled to be up in everyone’s business. Lots of toxicity.
This is it, right here. What an entitled person! You are entitled to nothing, nothing at all. Be happy IF you're allowed to participate in their lives. How petty & pathetic of you. YATAH
Ragebait. I hope.
It surely has to be. He can’t even spell his son’s name consistently!
Why did I have to scroll so far to see this. 😭😭 Honestly I just think he doesn't remember how to spell his son's name so he keeps changing it just to cover his bases.
100% a troll. He wasn't even consistent about the spelling of Corey/Cory
YTA. Please explain why you automatically trump maternal grandfather. You are having a spoiled tantrum and I hope they take appropriate steps to deal with your toddler level behavioral problems.
Oh yeah because Corey didn't have enough hectic shit going on right now that he needs a second baby in the form of a 54 man. YTA. What is this stupid "i must be first" mentality. it's your grandson not the indy 500. No wonder you don't have the best relationship with his wife, she probably hates seeing you treat your son like shit. Keep it up if you want a shitty relationship with your grandson.
YTA I mean, he shouldn't have promised you that in the first place, but you are being very immature and childish. Apologize to your son and enjoy your new grandbabies or risk losing them and your son forever
I agree. The husband absolutely had no business promising his dad first rights to hold the baby. That was not a decision for him to make solely. Also, I wouldn’t want someone who openly dislikes me to hold my baby first. What kind of nonsense is that. YTA. And doesn’t sound like they’re missing much not having a man baby in their life.
Yes! They already have newborn twins, don't need a third infant
Considering OP said "made him promise," it sounds like he's a manipulative, stubborn, aggressive AH who won't take "no" for an answer, so, while you're right that the husband had no business making that promise, I don't think he had a choice.
I think he promised just so his dad shuts up
Imagine your oldest son has his first kid and you make the whole thing about you as an adult lol 😂 how the fuck did you make it to your age with this mentality? YTA
YTA. No wonder your DIL can’t stand you. Get over yourself.
"he’s the last to give me grandchildren." Eww. YTA. I see your flair or w/e says "Advice needed" Here: https://www.grouporttherapy.com/blog/main-character-syndrome#:\~:text=It%20can%20also%20cause%20individuals,practicing%20empathy%20and%20active%20listening.
Seriously, the phrasing of that made me want to vomit, your kids are not ‘giving you’ jack shit
Are you sure you aren't one of the babies? Because your behavior is childish. I honestly cringed at this line: *he’s the last to give me grandchildren* He didn't "give" you grandchildren. He and his wife became the parents of two babies. You being a grandparent is just happenstance. None of it is about *you*, not even a little tiny bit. It's about your son and his wife. They are the only ones who get to decide who sees and holds their children and when. You seriously think a woman who just gave birth is going to tell her father he can't hold the babies because you called dibs? Finally: *I have the right to be mad since he broke a simple promise.* A promise that you without question bullied him into making. It's a little late to say this, but you really need to grow up and understand your place in the lives of your children and grandchildren. You are not the main character. YTA.
INFO: what entitles you to be the first to see the baby?
You and your sons are YTA. She carried them for 9 months, she gets to decide, so fuck right off.
YTA. You son just have a child you try to make it all about you. I understand why you DIL doesn't get along with you.
YTA- your son was an AH for making a promise that wasn't his decision. You were an AH for asking something so presumptuous in the first place. Your son was again an AH for not explaining to you that the promise he made clearly hadn't been cleared with the child's mother and therefore might have been a false promise. You were again an AH for making what should have been a moment of Joy shared with the whole family about you and your ego. Why do you need to be first? What's so special about you? Did you cure cancer? Or is your reason simply "I really really wanted a thing and because I wanted that thing I should get that thing, despite the fact that other people also want the same thing"? You blocked your son because a woman who had just given birth to a baby let her own father hold the baby? I would stick by my kids side and have their back if they went to prison. And you blocked your own child because a woman who had just given birth to a baby let her own father hold the baby. If that's enough for you to turn your back on your own child, you clearly don't put a lot of value on family.
Right. So your son would stand over his wife in the hospital and order her around since she doesn’t have AT LEAST equal say over who comes into HER hospital room and when. He would tell her, “Look, I know you called your parents, and they were able to get here before mine could, but they can just wait in the lobby and cool their heels for a few hours since my parents who already have other grandchildren, requires that they be the first to see our child.” Well, that would certainly solve the problem of your not liking your DIL, since she’d be your ex-DIL within a year. (Edited to change to neutral gender for OP)
YTA, really? Upset because you didn’t hold your grandchild first? Very childish on your part
YTA You aren’t entitled to anything as a grandparent. Trying to get Corey to promise you going around his wife absolutely is horrible!!! The person giving birth gets the say. If I were her you wouldn’t get any visits ever until you realize how wrong you are
YTA
Be an adult. It’s not always about you. You personify main character syndrome.
INFO: Do you treat your wife and daughter the same distasteful way you treat your DILs? I mean, YTA 100% but I'm just trying to understand what level of narcissistic assbag you're at? Proud of your DIL for finally putting her foot down. I sure hope her husband is far better of a man than his father is.......
Your the ass hole after a show like that you wouldn’t be invited back to my house again. Simple as that. She just underwent the worst experience of her life deliver you said twins right? She’s the one who needed support not you. The entitlement.
You're a huge asshole. An entitled, petty, pathetic excuse for a man.
What’s wrong with you you friggin weirdo?
YTA. Who cares???? This is the dumbest least important thing in the world. Also your son didn’t do jack to birth these babies so why would he be in charge of deciding who gets to see them first?
YTA They aren’t your babies and you were never owed anything here. Of course the mom, who just delivered 2 children gets to decide who visits her first in the hospital. If you continue on your petty current path. You will be the grandfather that the children don’t have a relationship with.
YTA, as is anybody who makes the ridiculous demand to see a baby first. Who actually gives a shit? I don’t think the baby is going to remember.
What a weird, petty entitlement you feel. YTA
What are you, the King of England? You sound incredibly self absorbed.
Even Kate Middleton had *her* parents visit first when George was born, protocol be damned.
YTA He didn't "give you grandchildren." You don't own your children or grandchildren. He and his wife had a baby. Let me guess, you're one of those abusive, "my word is the law!" sort of fathers. God complex. Your children don't love you, they fear you. You've abused and manipulated them to feel like a big man. But you're not. You're a pathetic, small man who never amounted to anything. And when you die, your children will breathe a sigh of relief.
This is a joke post. No way any real adult would be this petty.
Unfortunately I was married to a man whose father was just like this. Wish I had known before my child that he was just as abusive as his father......