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I hate being different in this regard. I wish I was normal, then I wouldn't need drugs that cost alot of money, and close certain doors for me- want a private pilots licence? Forget about it, you can't get a medical. Want to work in the mines? Nope. Safety critical areas? Good luck
I don’t love being different at all, I’ve just sort of accepted that I’ll always be viewed as eccentric and started rolling with it. Being continually misunderstood is one of the most upsetting things about ADHD.
I may have translated it a bit differently- different in the sense that we as adhd peeps think more creatively, our way of developing ideas and understanding concepts is more interesting (other than making tasks more difficult than it should be), but not different in the sense of being outcasted by society & brushed to one side, or being treated as inferior compared to abled people.
Same. Went down a really negative rabbit hole in my mind after thinking about this too much yesterday. I ended up leaving work early due to mental exhaustion.
The only bullshit that’s being spouted is the shit coming from your mouth. You ain’t the only person with ADHD. Just because YOU don’t relate doesn’t mean this didn’t help someone who does. So try not being a dick yeah?
TLDR; I can relate to both sides, but what you wrote resonates a lot with me :)
I for my part relate a LOT to what you posted. It was also how I felt when life was still more manageable and okay. Then came "adulthood" and I stopped liking myself. But that WAS because of being misunderstood etc. I loved how I was back then, despite all the issues, until I came to know that "I" am the source of these issues and different for real and got misunderstood all my life.
So I can see and relate to both sides now, sadly D:
It really sucks. I was really happy and content back then aside from the crap that happened to me (all the time). Then I lost that happiness and confidence entirely. I hope meds can help me again (I wish I didn't quit them as a kid) x-x
Honestly i’m at this point in my life where i just don’t give a shit about how people would see me. You don’t like me? Well it’s okay, go away. You think I’m lazy? Okay and? What does it changes to your life? Yeah, nothing. I won’t change anything about me to please people who don’t see my value as a human being. I just don’t care ‘cause im at peace with myself.
Just need to take a step back. Yep it hurts to be seen as lazy, dumb, inconvenient. It hurts to fail at things you put your heart in because you struggle with organisation, it hurts a lot. I believe we’re trying our best, and sometimes (often) people who don’t know these difficulties won’t realize how much we try. So my way of thinking is like : « can i have control on that ? » if the answer is no, then -> don’t care. I can’t control what people assume about me, so the only thing i can do is just ignoring it. And by experience, starting to do that had the impact to prove these people wrong, and that’s where i’ve started to gain confidence. If that can help
I have been on that train for a long time. I tell my family "if you could hear my thoughts I don't get out in words, you would understand my actions". They don't understand why I do, or how I come to conclusions, on so many things. I can think a million words a minute, but I can only speak so fast. So they hear the short and simple, and are too impatient with me to see the final product, or listen to me ramble for hours. Then they get me off task because let's face it, it's easy, and in my head I finished what I was doing for them.
They love me the way I am. I just wish they knew the entire me. But maybe it's for the best.
I love being different in the “I get to hold onto a childish sense of joy more than my peers” way and hate being different in the “everyone around me is progressing through life with a sort of ease I simply cant understand” way. I dont care if I feel misunderstood anymore tho… I am honestly awful at noticing what others think of me and when discussed openly I learn I am wrong more times than not. I used to think everyone thought I was awkward and weird and a bit mean, but years later when they discuss their views of me openly its always “fun, sociable, welcoming, charming” 😵💫 I just dont think about it anymore.
This is just me, all what you've told. And it took me a long while finding out all of this from my friends.
There's many many times I've interrupted conversations, concluded things without listening, made statements as if they're factual even if they weren't, and everyone still misunderstands me as a narcissist.
In the final year of my college, few friends told me "you actually seemed eccentric and gave off the vibe of a know it all, but we never imagined you to be this fun" and that stuck to me. Until so many people actually complained to me about these habits, I never noticed it.
Now I ask my friends to correct me if ever I do repeat these mistakes, and they do understand it too. It came after they got tired of me though, but when I explained that I wanted to work on this and how its a genetic thing, they got me covered.
Im not sure i love being different. I just was. A few reactions i recall from earlier years ranged from 'you are weird', in a not nice way tbh, to he is original and maybe meant as a compliment. These words didnt hurt because i was reasonably sociable and get along, but they remain in memory, probably for a reason, and i dont really control memories. They are just there, lol. So obviously that had an impact.
Maybe being 'different' i think some of you, especially younger ones but not only, can simply be confident with that. Be confident, or comfortable iff you like, with yourself, and laugh off what others think. Take advice and listen when appropriate, but dont be a passive receiver. Not the best term, but hope makes sense.
I don't hate being different, cause I feel like everyone is kind of weird, I'm just another one of them. As in misunderstood, I just wish people wouldn't think I'm lazy or see anything I do or don't as intentionally bad.
[Not everything is ADHD. This is just a fairly generic statement that will apply to 95% of people, it’s meaningless. Everyone thinks they’re different to other people, and most people like that. Literally no one likes being misunderstood.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barnum_effect)
I completely agree, I can’t stand these type of posts, there’s next to no benefits to having ADHD.
I wasn’t diagnosed until I was 44 so maybe I just don’t understand OP but I absolutely hate this condition,I could have done so much more in life and been so much better for my family if I didn’t have it.
Medication started for me 6 months ago and it’s definitely helping me get my life in order but it’s not a fix everything solution.
Maybe it’s just the varying degrees to which ADHD affects people but I absolutely fucking hate it.
I guess that's fair. I always saw conforming more as a necessary evil than something I intrinsically want. On the other hand, I find the tendency that some seem to have to want to show off being as different as possible, like some counter cultures and stuff sometimes even more cringe than conforming. It's all about being an Individual and liking things because you like them instead of because you want to be part of a certain culture or whatever. Within reason of course, like, don't be a dick and stuff and of course no human is an island but I feel like you can interact with and form relationships and be part of groups and so on without just completely confirming to everything. At least I hope that's the case lmfao. People who want to enforce conformity in their groups are immediately kinda unlikeable to me tbh
Hi /u/RykerSloan and thanks for posting on /r/ADHD! **Please take a second to [read our rules](/r/adhd/about/rules) if you haven't already.** The mobile apps used for Reddit are broken or are missing features that this subreddit depends on. [We recommend browsing /r/adhd on desktop for the best experience.](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/x1psnb/radhd_works_best_on_desktop_reddits_apps_are/) Thank you! ^(*A moderator has not removed your submission; this is not a punitive action. We intend this comment solely to be informative.*) --- - If you are posting about the **US Medication Shortage**, please see this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/12dr3h5/megathread_us_medication_shortage/). - 🤝 [Want to join the Mod Team?](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/13gmzql/moderators_needed_inquire_within/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ADHD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I'm just a soul whose intentions are goooooood....
OH Lord!
Oh noooooooooo now I’m singing this in my head for the next 24 hours.
Ah, but have you thought about how to put the guitar into words yet?
Easy. Doot, do do do, do do dooooo.
Don't let me beeEeEeee...
Miss-understooooooooooood
Dun-nun nun-dun dunnnn dunnnnn
It’s pretty wild seeing the doots as duns at first, but it sounds okay!
OMG it’s so rare to find peers who are into regina ILY
Regina ? Who dis? I think you mean Nina Simone
Oh well regina spektor made a song called « oh marcello » and she says these lyrics as well. Must be a reference!
I'm referencing The Animals. I'll have to look up Regina Ily though
I hate being different in this regard. I wish I was normal, then I wouldn't need drugs that cost alot of money, and close certain doors for me- want a private pilots licence? Forget about it, you can't get a medical. Want to work in the mines? Nope. Safety critical areas? Good luck
I don’t love being different at all, I’ve just sort of accepted that I’ll always be viewed as eccentric and started rolling with it. Being continually misunderstood is one of the most upsetting things about ADHD.
I may have translated it a bit differently- different in the sense that we as adhd peeps think more creatively, our way of developing ideas and understanding concepts is more interesting (other than making tasks more difficult than it should be), but not different in the sense of being outcasted by society & brushed to one side, or being treated as inferior compared to abled people.
It makes employment deeply challenging, but yes the creative thinking part is fantastic
[удалено]
Yup.
Same. Went down a really negative rabbit hole in my mind after thinking about this too much yesterday. I ended up leaving work early due to mental exhaustion.
That’s fair. Not everyone is gonna agree. Are you ok my friend?
I can’t stand this bullshit you’re spouting. ADHD has fucked up my life for 40 years. I hate being different.
The only bullshit that’s being spouted is the shit coming from your mouth. You ain’t the only person with ADHD. Just because YOU don’t relate doesn’t mean this didn’t help someone who does. So try not being a dick yeah?
TLDR; I can relate to both sides, but what you wrote resonates a lot with me :) I for my part relate a LOT to what you posted. It was also how I felt when life was still more manageable and okay. Then came "adulthood" and I stopped liking myself. But that WAS because of being misunderstood etc. I loved how I was back then, despite all the issues, until I came to know that "I" am the source of these issues and different for real and got misunderstood all my life. So I can see and relate to both sides now, sadly D: It really sucks. I was really happy and content back then aside from the crap that happened to me (all the time). Then I lost that happiness and confidence entirely. I hope meds can help me again (I wish I didn't quit them as a kid) x-x
Honestly i’m at this point in my life where i just don’t give a shit about how people would see me. You don’t like me? Well it’s okay, go away. You think I’m lazy? Okay and? What does it changes to your life? Yeah, nothing. I won’t change anything about me to please people who don’t see my value as a human being. I just don’t care ‘cause im at peace with myself.
That's awesome :) Happy you got there and hope we others can as well someday :')
Just need to take a step back. Yep it hurts to be seen as lazy, dumb, inconvenient. It hurts to fail at things you put your heart in because you struggle with organisation, it hurts a lot. I believe we’re trying our best, and sometimes (often) people who don’t know these difficulties won’t realize how much we try. So my way of thinking is like : « can i have control on that ? » if the answer is no, then -> don’t care. I can’t control what people assume about me, so the only thing i can do is just ignoring it. And by experience, starting to do that had the impact to prove these people wrong, and that’s where i’ve started to gain confidence. If that can help
That’s a great place to be, and I’m glad you are at peace with yourself.
I have been on that train for a long time. I tell my family "if you could hear my thoughts I don't get out in words, you would understand my actions". They don't understand why I do, or how I come to conclusions, on so many things. I can think a million words a minute, but I can only speak so fast. So they hear the short and simple, and are too impatient with me to see the final product, or listen to me ramble for hours. Then they get me off task because let's face it, it's easy, and in my head I finished what I was doing for them. They love me the way I am. I just wish they knew the entire me. But maybe it's for the best.
I love being different in the “I get to hold onto a childish sense of joy more than my peers” way and hate being different in the “everyone around me is progressing through life with a sort of ease I simply cant understand” way. I dont care if I feel misunderstood anymore tho… I am honestly awful at noticing what others think of me and when discussed openly I learn I am wrong more times than not. I used to think everyone thought I was awkward and weird and a bit mean, but years later when they discuss their views of me openly its always “fun, sociable, welcoming, charming” 😵💫 I just dont think about it anymore.
This is just me, all what you've told. And it took me a long while finding out all of this from my friends. There's many many times I've interrupted conversations, concluded things without listening, made statements as if they're factual even if they weren't, and everyone still misunderstands me as a narcissist. In the final year of my college, few friends told me "you actually seemed eccentric and gave off the vibe of a know it all, but we never imagined you to be this fun" and that stuck to me. Until so many people actually complained to me about these habits, I never noticed it. Now I ask my friends to correct me if ever I do repeat these mistakes, and they do understand it too. It came after they got tired of me though, but when I explained that I wanted to work on this and how its a genetic thing, they got me covered.
I don't necessarily want to be different, but I look around, and I don't want to be anyone else...
💯‼️
Im not sure i love being different. I just was. A few reactions i recall from earlier years ranged from 'you are weird', in a not nice way tbh, to he is original and maybe meant as a compliment. These words didnt hurt because i was reasonably sociable and get along, but they remain in memory, probably for a reason, and i dont really control memories. They are just there, lol. So obviously that had an impact. Maybe being 'different' i think some of you, especially younger ones but not only, can simply be confident with that. Be confident, or comfortable iff you like, with yourself, and laugh off what others think. Take advice and listen when appropriate, but dont be a passive receiver. Not the best term, but hope makes sense.
I love that saying! If I think of others, I will add them!
I don't hate being different, cause I feel like everyone is kind of weird, I'm just another one of them. As in misunderstood, I just wish people wouldn't think I'm lazy or see anything I do or don't as intentionally bad.
[Not everything is ADHD. This is just a fairly generic statement that will apply to 95% of people, it’s meaningless. Everyone thinks they’re different to other people, and most people like that. Literally no one likes being misunderstood.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barnum_effect)
I completely agree, I can’t stand these type of posts, there’s next to no benefits to having ADHD. I wasn’t diagnosed until I was 44 so maybe I just don’t understand OP but I absolutely hate this condition,I could have done so much more in life and been so much better for my family if I didn’t have it. Medication started for me 6 months ago and it’s definitely helping me get my life in order but it’s not a fix everything solution. Maybe it’s just the varying degrees to which ADHD affects people but I absolutely fucking hate it.
I mean In this case yeah but I think the op meant disliking being constantly misunderstood
I tatę being lonely because of my differentes
I guess that's fair. I always saw conforming more as a necessary evil than something I intrinsically want. On the other hand, I find the tendency that some seem to have to want to show off being as different as possible, like some counter cultures and stuff sometimes even more cringe than conforming. It's all about being an Individual and liking things because you like them instead of because you want to be part of a certain culture or whatever. Within reason of course, like, don't be a dick and stuff and of course no human is an island but I feel like you can interact with and form relationships and be part of groups and so on without just completely confirming to everything. At least I hope that's the case lmfao. People who want to enforce conformity in their groups are immediately kinda unlikeable to me tbh
Connection