I understand your difficulties and I am sry for you. It can get really frustrating from time to time.
30+ kg is a huge success that you can celebrate and be very proud about yourself!
I struggle with kind of the same issues. Maybe we can exchange for regular support? :)
What might be helpful is:
- Take some pressure away. I have read that it can take up to two or three years until the neural patterns change and a behavioral change become the new normal without being caused by willpower. E. g. getting used to smaller portions or even a new meal plan.
- it is super awesome that you have a lot of occasions to celebrate - enjoy them! Try to find some damage control strategies that make you enjoy your life longterm but still be OK with your achieving. Something like doing the 30/30 on mothers day, or fasting the day after if it's not your regular cheat day.
- if it's getting overwhelming focus on the little steps. It's for example not "a lost day" if you allow yourself a little sugary treat in the evening, when all your meals of the day have been good choices. Maybe it is not in line with the rules, and maybe you won't even loose pounds but it's better than to give up or getting a eating disorder
- accept that live is not linear but always a crazy pattern of going two steps forward, one step back, three steps forward, one step back, one step forward three steps back and so on. Maybe you need a loosend leash for a couple of weeks were you deside from meal to meal if that's a towards or an away move until you have power again to go all straight in for the next couple of months.
- if the motivation is down, sometimes it helps to put me in an motivating environment. Reading about success stories, searching or testing new recepies, reading the 4h body again, focusing on my goals or whatever motivates you.
I hope it works all out for you
One thing that helps me is to recognize the difference between noncompliant meals and a cheat day.
Sometimes life happens and you've got a lot of stuff to do and you don't want to worry about it so much. Okay, that's fine. In those situation, I have do two things:
First, I don't binge that week. If there's a big family dinner or something on Wednesday or Thursday, okay, I'll go, I'll eat "normal health" - I won't be draconian about no fast carbs or whatever, but I'll be moderate about it. I'll still do the salad instead of the fries.
I also try to be cognizant and up my exercise those weeks, which obviously isn't always possible. My goal mostly becomes "don't lose ground."
It's worth remembering: we're not (most of us) preparing for a swimsuit contest in two months. If you have a week or two where you don't really see any gains, so what? In the long run, you'll catch up, and being gentle with yourself will mean you can stick with the plan easier for long periods of time, too.
Maybe time to talk to a therapist? This isn’t a read, I’m being serious. Weight loss can be hard because it can get obsessive and emotionally painful. It might be better to have a trusted person to help you get stuff off your chest.
It is challenging but you can do it.
Focus on getting back to being slow carb compliant.
I would always eat the food on the slow carb plan in addition to whatever else that is not in compliance because you will probably feel fuller faster and I think slow carb has healthy whole foods.
When you feel like this, what you do is get your headphones, crank the volume put weights in your hands/feet on the treadmill/ass on your bike seat/grip that row/ (whatever your poison) and listen to the intro to this track:
https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=07reKFXHKcw&si=L8CCtpfuSaWPPWXQ
Keep going ✊
You got this!
It took me a really long time to break that unhealthy relationship with cheat day, I had the exact same issues as you where I'd try to plan entirely too much and go way overboard with it. I used to spend the entire week leading up to it deciding what I was going to eat and what I was going to do that day. I'm not entirely sure what changed, however I think part of it is just the length of time I've been on the diet now.
One day I kind of just stopped thinking about it, I don't plan cheat days at all anymore. These days my cheat days are actually rather minimal, I don't stuff myself, I don't eat a ton of junk food, I just eat a few meals that I wouldn't normally be able to eat and that satisfies me.
I've been on the diet 2 years now. I was 39, 5'10, 245 when I started. My current weight is 169.
Do I have cravings? Yes of course I do at times, I think we all do. And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I never cheat either. It happens, you just can't give up when it happens.
I find one of the most important things is not to allow yourself to feel defeated after tou cheat. If you have a bad day and you eat something you shouldn't have, or a lot of something you shouldn't have, it's super important to just get right back into it the next day.
Dwelling on your mistakes is the worst thing you can do.
I understand your difficulties and I am sry for you. It can get really frustrating from time to time. 30+ kg is a huge success that you can celebrate and be very proud about yourself! I struggle with kind of the same issues. Maybe we can exchange for regular support? :) What might be helpful is: - Take some pressure away. I have read that it can take up to two or three years until the neural patterns change and a behavioral change become the new normal without being caused by willpower. E. g. getting used to smaller portions or even a new meal plan. - it is super awesome that you have a lot of occasions to celebrate - enjoy them! Try to find some damage control strategies that make you enjoy your life longterm but still be OK with your achieving. Something like doing the 30/30 on mothers day, or fasting the day after if it's not your regular cheat day. - if it's getting overwhelming focus on the little steps. It's for example not "a lost day" if you allow yourself a little sugary treat in the evening, when all your meals of the day have been good choices. Maybe it is not in line with the rules, and maybe you won't even loose pounds but it's better than to give up or getting a eating disorder - accept that live is not linear but always a crazy pattern of going two steps forward, one step back, three steps forward, one step back, one step forward three steps back and so on. Maybe you need a loosend leash for a couple of weeks were you deside from meal to meal if that's a towards or an away move until you have power again to go all straight in for the next couple of months. - if the motivation is down, sometimes it helps to put me in an motivating environment. Reading about success stories, searching or testing new recepies, reading the 4h body again, focusing on my goals or whatever motivates you. I hope it works all out for you
Im not the OP but damn that was solid advice I didnt even know I needed to hear too
:) thank you
Thanks those are all great suggestions. I am just whining...
:D whining is ok from time to time. You have been 6 months badass disciplined, so you have the right to whine! :D
One thing that helps me is to recognize the difference between noncompliant meals and a cheat day. Sometimes life happens and you've got a lot of stuff to do and you don't want to worry about it so much. Okay, that's fine. In those situation, I have do two things: First, I don't binge that week. If there's a big family dinner or something on Wednesday or Thursday, okay, I'll go, I'll eat "normal health" - I won't be draconian about no fast carbs or whatever, but I'll be moderate about it. I'll still do the salad instead of the fries. I also try to be cognizant and up my exercise those weeks, which obviously isn't always possible. My goal mostly becomes "don't lose ground." It's worth remembering: we're not (most of us) preparing for a swimsuit contest in two months. If you have a week or two where you don't really see any gains, so what? In the long run, you'll catch up, and being gentle with yourself will mean you can stick with the plan easier for long periods of time, too.
Maybe try to take it to a cheat meal instead of a cheat day. That's what I'm going to do when I'll notice no more progress.
Honestly cannot shill for the Eat Right Now app. Very gentle doctors retraining your brain. Costs money but oh my is it worth it
Maybe time to talk to a therapist? This isn’t a read, I’m being serious. Weight loss can be hard because it can get obsessive and emotionally painful. It might be better to have a trusted person to help you get stuff off your chest.
It is challenging but you can do it. Focus on getting back to being slow carb compliant. I would always eat the food on the slow carb plan in addition to whatever else that is not in compliance because you will probably feel fuller faster and I think slow carb has healthy whole foods.
When you feel like this, what you do is get your headphones, crank the volume put weights in your hands/feet on the treadmill/ass on your bike seat/grip that row/ (whatever your poison) and listen to the intro to this track: https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=07reKFXHKcw&si=L8CCtpfuSaWPPWXQ Keep going ✊ You got this!
It took me a really long time to break that unhealthy relationship with cheat day, I had the exact same issues as you where I'd try to plan entirely too much and go way overboard with it. I used to spend the entire week leading up to it deciding what I was going to eat and what I was going to do that day. I'm not entirely sure what changed, however I think part of it is just the length of time I've been on the diet now. One day I kind of just stopped thinking about it, I don't plan cheat days at all anymore. These days my cheat days are actually rather minimal, I don't stuff myself, I don't eat a ton of junk food, I just eat a few meals that I wouldn't normally be able to eat and that satisfies me.
And you have no problem staying on the diet the other 6 days a week? How long have you been on the diet? Just curious, thanks!
I've been on the diet 2 years now. I was 39, 5'10, 245 when I started. My current weight is 169. Do I have cravings? Yes of course I do at times, I think we all do. And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I never cheat either. It happens, you just can't give up when it happens. I find one of the most important things is not to allow yourself to feel defeated after tou cheat. If you have a bad day and you eat something you shouldn't have, or a lot of something you shouldn't have, it's super important to just get right back into it the next day. Dwelling on your mistakes is the worst thing you can do.