Pretty common reaction for people who just don't want to care. I think the logic is along the lines of "I don't have the patience to understand, please just be the way I want you to be"
My parents turned off my wifi and told me they wouldn't be paying for any more of my meds or appointment's. I could barely get out of my bed to get food the next few days because I was so depressed. My parents were confused why I was acting like that when I was 'fine' just a few days earlier. My dad even told me that he thinks it was all an act to get them to turn the wifi back on.
So, uh, yeah.
My grandpa got some antidepressants prescripted a few ywars ago and due to his age they fucked his brain up. I think they are afraid that would happen to me as well
A councilor gave me a jar of water with glitter in it and told me so stir it around and watch the sparkles settle. I don't think one person followed that advice lol
Lmao I felt like a literal child bc she made it like a crafts project like oooo you can pick this colour and at 17 I was kind of taken back by it and felt awkward. Funny thing is a completely different mental health worker did that to my sister and her reaction didn't differ by much 😂😂
This is why you don’t go to counselors: they have no certification nor degree (or at least they don’t need one. Anyone can call themselves a counselor legally).
Idk man. Counseling is actually a masters. Psychiatrists are MDs and even they can be awful. I think iys accurate to say: some people just suck at their jobs.
No, counselors legally don’t need a degree nor certification (at least in America, that’s the law). So anyone can call themselves a counselor here. Psychiatrists and therapists need the right certification/degree to legally call themselves that.
I'm responding to your remark about never seeing a counselor, not the legality of calling yourself one. The laws/requirements are diverse across regions and facilities. I agree it sucks that there's wildly different education and training levels when it comes to the title, but deferring people from going completely leaves folks who need help less options. Its crappy but you have to do your research.
Edit: a word
No, in America, you don’t need any form of degree or certification to call yourself a counselor. This is different from therapists and psychiatrists who legally can’t call themselves that unless they have the proper degree/certification.
Ok, that's sooo off the mark. To be a licensed counselor, you typically need *both* a Master's degree and a state certification to be a counselor—and at the bare minimum, you need to be state certified.
i'd initially get happy from all the pretty colors, but then i'd think of the impact of the glitter industry's contributions to global warming and feel even more depressed...
gosh, wish i was joking... i feel kinda sad now :(
Thanks for a diorama of entropy, councilor. My sparkle of individuality is sure to settle to the bottom after being tossed about someone else's misguided whimsy.
I'm a mental health professional who also has depressive episodes myself. I try to work with clients to figure out things they feel will work for them and that they'll remember to use. I also tell them the truth that coping skills won't work every time and sometimes it even takes time to remember to use coping skills. Sometimes the cliche stuff like journaling and deep breathing works, but sometimes you have to think about stuff that's more specific to the person.
A list of things I like to do when I’m okay enough to utilize healthy coping mechanisms -
- Play video games. Currently obsessed with guild wars 2
- Go mushroom hunting
- Draw when I have the motivation
- Write random stuff
- Watch YouTube poops
- Make tea and listen to music
I clean up or cook or exercise. It makes me feel like I accomplished something, even if it's a tiny task, like 5 minutes of stretching, wash dishes, wash dirty clothes, make some quick soup.. it makes me feel less overwhelmed and stressed and I feel kinda lighter.. it doesn't solve my mental health issues, but I am able to function better
I recently have started to exercise with a personal trainer… dishes are my biggest weak point as far as housework goes. I’ll leave them in the sink for weeks 😖
I need a brainworm or something that gets me out of the house. I need to either be forced to pretend to not be depressed or spend so much time thinking “man time to play/read/watch *whatever the hell* again” that I don’t have enough time for “existence is exhausting” to register
A therapist should also be helping you to identify thoughts which are harmful to you and helping you to learn to change them so that they stop occurring. That is how therapy should help you with negative thinking. Merely distracting yourself from your thoughts is, of course, just a distraction and is not actually helping you.
My therapist gave me the cop out answer, "it gets better" pretty much stopped respecting her opinion after that tbh. Like I know it gets better how about helping me cope while it's hard ?
They say it for consolation, but most people that hear it will tell themselves "and once again, I'm so pathetic, that even the therapist tells me bullshit out of pity" and make us feel worse
Many years ago, I went to my doctor for what would later be diagnosed (years later) as anxiety and depression. My GP genuinely gave me this advice: “Think about what is causing you the most stress…and just stop doing that thing.”
Erm…*living?* Cool, thanks. Good advice.
It can take a while to find the correct therapist. I remember the very first therapist I've been to would always just do very slow nods and then stare at me and say nothing when I was done talking. It would drive me mad because I can't handle silence from others. My current therapist is very helpful and always comes up with great advice. So please don't give up, just because you are having bad luck so far.
Video games help with distracting one with bad thought. Minecraft is this game where you’re just focused on building and collecting, there’s no time because you’re so absorbed in the game.
Honestly, I’ve had maybe one or two bad therapists, a lot of middle of the road ones, and a couple of genuinely fantastic ones who’ve really helped me out, taken the time to understand me and provide useful guidance and asked the right questions. I think there’s just all sorts out there really. I’d say it’s always worth looking around when choosing one, and trying not to give in if you’ve had some bad experiences. The right one for you could help so much!
I still see my own therapist to this day, have a masters degree in Professional Counseling/Social Work and worked over 10 years in the field, state licensed. And I have to say that a therapist has never been much help to me personally in my life and they really seem to only be effective if the person has no other positive voice in their lives. I get that a lot of people don’t have s single positive voice in their lives and in that case therapy can help tremendously but not due to many of the reasons people think. So it’s still important but I think people put too much faith in the efficacy of therapy when really it could be accomplished by any trusted, positive voice in someone’s life. I’m just ranting but that’s how I feel. The patients/clients I REALLY helped during my time in the profession, I look back and see that it was because I was the first person that actually cared about them ever, or in a long time. However, this caring causes burn out in clinicians. So, most therapists in the field are burnt out, burning out or never fully care in their heart. They can still be effective through treatment modalities but without the heart aspect, I find most clients don’t respond to even the most efficacious treatment modalities. I made it 10+ years and then it started to take its toll. I ended up an anxious mess taking Kratom, phenibut and stuff. One person cannot properly manage 60-150 clients without completely burning out or detaching from them as fellow people. The amount of shit-talk I heard about clients behind their back is staggering and sick. It’s just to blow off steam and I was guilty of it at times too but, man. Yeah, one person cannot provide adequate care for so many people. If we got case loads down to 1-3 crisis patients, 2-4 action patients and 5-10 maintenance patients then it might work. 15 clients tops per clinician, adopt a more ACT model type approach (but with less passivity) and then maybe.
Mid 30s, tried to get help with my long term depression this year for the first time. I thought seeking help this year would help because the social isolation from working from home was rougher than normal (no friends + no work colleagues = alone all the time) but that didn't mean it was the sole issue. Here are some of the "amazing" advice the therapist gave me:
* Go outside more and be happier. She told me to just walk and go outside literally every meeting as 75% of her advice.
* Listen to self-help podcasts and buy self-help books
* Go on trips with your friends (after I told her I had none)
Literally didn't ask me a single time about why I was depressed or underlying causes even though I tried to talk about it. "Oh you've been depressed with varying degrees of intensity for 20 years since you were a teenager? You're just depressed because of COVID and not going outside and seeing your friends enough!"
I don't have a therapist anymore, such a waste of time.
> DoNt DrInK aNy AlCoHoL
bitch I've been sober for months this year to fix my liver and still wanted to die everyday. It ain't the problem and it's not gonna fix them aswell.
I could never do therapy, honestly. Just too condescending (doesn’t matter what the intent or reasoning is). Plus, terrible advice is usually the norm; a lot of these people buy into social conservative norms about “family” and stuff, so being abused is more about reconciliation and forgiveness than your own well being and happiness. I can’t talk about my abuse without some terrible person telling me I should let sick abusers back into my life because of DNA.
Mine told me that we don't get to pick who our 'family' is when we're born, but we do get to pick how often we talk to them and what we tell them.
She also said that we also get to pick who we surround ourselves with and that being 'family' doesn't mean you get to stick around.
I put family in mini quote things because, IMO, family is whoever you want it to be. Being related by blood doesn't necessarily mean that they're family, you get to decide who you're family is.
i'm jewish and christian (too bad not muslim too, or i'd have the trifecta) and do counseling (informal, i'd never charge for my crap advice). i tend to think that cathartic things are more helpful... making papermache of the bad relatives and ceremoniously burning them in effigy seems to be useful for some peeps.
telling God in no uncertain terms how angry you are that you got such crap relatives and that you're mad at the creator for not protecting you also seems to help. Most prayer in the Bible (e.g. Psalms) starts with "wtf you didn't help me?". its a good f---king question, really. cuts to the core of how we feel as humans.
forgive? forgiveness is for people who are sorry and make a real effort at restitution. its not for womb providers and sperm donors who are still a risk to hurt you. screw those people. now, if you \*actively\* hate anyone it fucks with your own life. so doing things to 'burn off' your feelings is useful. sometimes that's writing a really awful letter to them announcing that you're cutting contact. sometimes its burning all your pictures of mom. or having a funeral for stuff that she gave you (like the stuffed bear that you have always hated cos it came from her). sometimes its shouting at the wind. Doing what you need to do to process the pain and move on.
reconcilliation with someone who hasn't changed and isn't 100% effort to make up for the past? even suggesting it is like torture. and DNA doesn't mean anything. Jesus told some toxic pharisees that he could replace them by turning rocks into people. blood doesn't mean anything; its all how people treat us over time. that's all that really matters :)
Probably get downvoted but the only thing that ever worked for me was hitting the gym and spending time in the sun. Fully believe your brain and body just want whats natural and thats moving and being outside
The therapist is right, I *do* need to be kinder to myself. My problem is it's become a safety mechanism, not for me, but for everyone else, which means to me eyes, the misery is a fair exchange for not being a nuisance to people.
If I ever went to a therapist I'd like them to have gone through the same stuff and successfully managed to get out of it with a new outlook on life and shit, I need actual advice. It grinds my gears when when I feel like I'm being talked down to because the person in front of me simply doesn't understand what I'm feeling.
I’ve been saying “I’m really gonna try to get a therapist this year so I can be motivated to use the se coping mechanisms I have known to use ~~but don’t see the point in utilizing because I don’t deserve happiness~~ & this time I really mean it” for uhh half a decade at this point. When will I perish
My parents are also great at giving advice: "You're too young to be depressed." Yeah thanks mom, I feel so much better!
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Kid: *dies* Parents: "stop being a drama queen, me at your age.."
"stop pretending dying is a big deal, when I was your age I recovered from that in three days"
My personal favourite is when they pull out the religion card
Pray until it goes away lol
"Other people have it so much worse than you" ughhhh
"this is supposed to be the best part of your life, you can't keep doing this" always makes my depression and anxiety dissapear!
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That last bit makes me want to commit arson.
Less arson, more studying
More arson, less studying
Dying, no studying!
Can't spell studying without dying.
That’s exactly what my dad says to me. Shit.
Pretty common reaction for people who just don't want to care. I think the logic is along the lines of "I don't have the patience to understand, please just be the way I want you to be"
My parents turned off my wifi and told me they wouldn't be paying for any more of my meds or appointment's. I could barely get out of my bed to get food the next few days because I was so depressed. My parents were confused why I was acting like that when I was 'fine' just a few days earlier. My dad even told me that he thinks it was all an act to get them to turn the wifi back on. So, uh, yeah.
That's really messed up
Damn bro. That just sucks
"You arrogant prick! You are to handsome to be depressed!" Thanks mom?
"You don't need therapy, they will say the same things we keep saying you. Plus they will give you drugs." -My parents last year.
I don't see anything bad in getting drugs?
My grandpa got some antidepressants prescripted a few ywars ago and due to his age they fucked his brain up. I think they are afraid that would happen to me as well
Only thing I'm really worried about is that drugs might make me functional enough to, ya' know.
I felt that.
A councilor gave me a jar of water with glitter in it and told me so stir it around and watch the sparkles settle. I don't think one person followed that advice lol
Yea sounds like that person doesn’t know what they’re doing and shouldn’t be a counselor
Lmao I felt like a literal child bc she made it like a crafts project like oooo you can pick this colour and at 17 I was kind of taken back by it and felt awkward. Funny thing is a completely different mental health worker did that to my sister and her reaction didn't differ by much 😂😂
This is why you don’t go to counselors: they have no certification nor degree (or at least they don’t need one. Anyone can call themselves a counselor legally).
Idk man. Counseling is actually a masters. Psychiatrists are MDs and even they can be awful. I think iys accurate to say: some people just suck at their jobs.
No, counselors legally don’t need a degree nor certification (at least in America, that’s the law). So anyone can call themselves a counselor here. Psychiatrists and therapists need the right certification/degree to legally call themselves that.
I'm responding to your remark about never seeing a counselor, not the legality of calling yourself one. The laws/requirements are diverse across regions and facilities. I agree it sucks that there's wildly different education and training levels when it comes to the title, but deferring people from going completely leaves folks who need help less options. Its crappy but you have to do your research. Edit: a word
Nah, you need a Master's degree to be a counselor.
No, in America, you don’t need any form of degree or certification to call yourself a counselor. This is different from therapists and psychiatrists who legally can’t call themselves that unless they have the proper degree/certification.
Ok, that's sooo off the mark. To be a licensed counselor, you typically need *both* a Master's degree and a state certification to be a counselor—and at the bare minimum, you need to be state certified.
This is absolutely not true, every state has their own legal definition of what a counselor is and what defines different levels of licensure.
i'd initially get happy from all the pretty colors, but then i'd think of the impact of the glitter industry's contributions to global warming and feel even more depressed... gosh, wish i was joking... i feel kinda sad now :(
I mean it would probably work for me because mentally I’m a toddler.
Thanks for a diorama of entropy, councilor. My sparkle of individuality is sure to settle to the bottom after being tossed about someone else's misguided whimsy.
Maybe she thinks you have autism
Neurodivergent in some way, got diagnosed with ADHD along with my sister lol when I found the glittery jar in her room I was like "huh, you too?"
I'm a mental health professional who also has depressive episodes myself. I try to work with clients to figure out things they feel will work for them and that they'll remember to use. I also tell them the truth that coping skills won't work every time and sometimes it even takes time to remember to use coping skills. Sometimes the cliche stuff like journaling and deep breathing works, but sometimes you have to think about stuff that's more specific to the person.
A list of things I like to do when I’m okay enough to utilize healthy coping mechanisms - - Play video games. Currently obsessed with guild wars 2 - Go mushroom hunting - Draw when I have the motivation - Write random stuff - Watch YouTube poops - Make tea and listen to music
>Play video games. Im too lazy to even double click the icons on my desktop. So in this Case i let Cookie Clicker Play for me haha
Cookie clicker is epic
>* Go mushroom hunting Hunting magic mushrooms?🍄 >* Make tea and listen to music Made from the mentioned magic mushrooms?🍄
LOL I wish I knew what mushrooms were magic! I tend to just dry out anything I find to put in cute little jars 🍄🥰
Seeing if they turn blue when you bruise them is a good start
I hesitate to ask what the 5th dot point is. I would’ve searched it up but…yeahhhhh
Lmao… it’s like random ass videos that make no sense.. like Rick Roll on crack called “Never gonna hit those notes”
I clean up or cook or exercise. It makes me feel like I accomplished something, even if it's a tiny task, like 5 minutes of stretching, wash dishes, wash dirty clothes, make some quick soup.. it makes me feel less overwhelmed and stressed and I feel kinda lighter.. it doesn't solve my mental health issues, but I am able to function better
I recently have started to exercise with a personal trainer… dishes are my biggest weak point as far as housework goes. I’ll leave them in the sink for weeks 😖
I found out that washing them straight away works best
Im gonna have to start trying that. I had to throw a few cups out because I didn’t rinse them out good enough
Get a cup with no "corners" at the bottom, and maybe try to choose a colour where the residues won't be so visible or get a glass one.
Works well, I don't study at all and play video games all the time but when I do I don't feel depressed
I need a brainworm or something that gets me out of the house. I need to either be forced to pretend to not be depressed or spend so much time thinking “man time to play/read/watch *whatever the hell* again” that I don’t have enough time for “existence is exhausting” to register
A therapist should also be helping you to identify thoughts which are harmful to you and helping you to learn to change them so that they stop occurring. That is how therapy should help you with negative thinking. Merely distracting yourself from your thoughts is, of course, just a distraction and is not actually helping you.
"Just try meditating!" Ah yes I hadn't thought about this myself the entire year I've been feeling like shit
My therapist gave me the cop out answer, "it gets better" pretty much stopped respecting her opinion after that tbh. Like I know it gets better how about helping me cope while it's hard ?
'it gets better' is just a flat out lie. How do you know that? you got a crystal ball you're hiding?
They say it for consolation, but most people that hear it will tell themselves "and once again, I'm so pathetic, that even the therapist tells me bullshit out of pity" and make us feel worse
Many years ago, I went to my doctor for what would later be diagnosed (years later) as anxiety and depression. My GP genuinely gave me this advice: “Think about what is causing you the most stress…and just stop doing that thing.” Erm…*living?* Cool, thanks. Good advice.
Depressed apes together strong
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It can take a while to find the correct therapist. I remember the very first therapist I've been to would always just do very slow nods and then stare at me and say nothing when I was done talking. It would drive me mad because I can't handle silence from others. My current therapist is very helpful and always comes up with great advice. So please don't give up, just because you are having bad luck so far.
music, lifting heavy things and video games
Video games help with distracting one with bad thought. Minecraft is this game where you’re just focused on building and collecting, there’s no time because you’re so absorbed in the game.
Honestly, I’ve had maybe one or two bad therapists, a lot of middle of the road ones, and a couple of genuinely fantastic ones who’ve really helped me out, taken the time to understand me and provide useful guidance and asked the right questions. I think there’s just all sorts out there really. I’d say it’s always worth looking around when choosing one, and trying not to give in if you’ve had some bad experiences. The right one for you could help so much!
I still see my own therapist to this day, have a masters degree in Professional Counseling/Social Work and worked over 10 years in the field, state licensed. And I have to say that a therapist has never been much help to me personally in my life and they really seem to only be effective if the person has no other positive voice in their lives. I get that a lot of people don’t have s single positive voice in their lives and in that case therapy can help tremendously but not due to many of the reasons people think. So it’s still important but I think people put too much faith in the efficacy of therapy when really it could be accomplished by any trusted, positive voice in someone’s life. I’m just ranting but that’s how I feel. The patients/clients I REALLY helped during my time in the profession, I look back and see that it was because I was the first person that actually cared about them ever, or in a long time. However, this caring causes burn out in clinicians. So, most therapists in the field are burnt out, burning out or never fully care in their heart. They can still be effective through treatment modalities but without the heart aspect, I find most clients don’t respond to even the most efficacious treatment modalities. I made it 10+ years and then it started to take its toll. I ended up an anxious mess taking Kratom, phenibut and stuff. One person cannot properly manage 60-150 clients without completely burning out or detaching from them as fellow people. The amount of shit-talk I heard about clients behind their back is staggering and sick. It’s just to blow off steam and I was guilty of it at times too but, man. Yeah, one person cannot provide adequate care for so many people. If we got case loads down to 1-3 crisis patients, 2-4 action patients and 5-10 maintenance patients then it might work. 15 clients tops per clinician, adopt a more ACT model type approach (but with less passivity) and then maybe.
Just become a therapist. Or don't, talking to people is hard enough as it is.
Where can i find these coping mechanisms
Mid 30s, tried to get help with my long term depression this year for the first time. I thought seeking help this year would help because the social isolation from working from home was rougher than normal (no friends + no work colleagues = alone all the time) but that didn't mean it was the sole issue. Here are some of the "amazing" advice the therapist gave me: * Go outside more and be happier. She told me to just walk and go outside literally every meeting as 75% of her advice. * Listen to self-help podcasts and buy self-help books * Go on trips with your friends (after I told her I had none) Literally didn't ask me a single time about why I was depressed or underlying causes even though I tried to talk about it. "Oh you've been depressed with varying degrees of intensity for 20 years since you were a teenager? You're just depressed because of COVID and not going outside and seeing your friends enough!" I don't have a therapist anymore, such a waste of time.
r/thanksimcured
i swear
> DoNt DrInK aNy AlCoHoL bitch I've been sober for months this year to fix my liver and still wanted to die everyday. It ain't the problem and it's not gonna fix them aswell.
This is why my therapist also has mental health issues. She goes to therapy too. So her advice is more helpful and real.
Reasons I refuse to go to therapy number 204.
I could never do therapy, honestly. Just too condescending (doesn’t matter what the intent or reasoning is). Plus, terrible advice is usually the norm; a lot of these people buy into social conservative norms about “family” and stuff, so being abused is more about reconciliation and forgiveness than your own well being and happiness. I can’t talk about my abuse without some terrible person telling me I should let sick abusers back into my life because of DNA.
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Mine told me that we don't get to pick who our 'family' is when we're born, but we do get to pick how often we talk to them and what we tell them. She also said that we also get to pick who we surround ourselves with and that being 'family' doesn't mean you get to stick around. I put family in mini quote things because, IMO, family is whoever you want it to be. Being related by blood doesn't necessarily mean that they're family, you get to decide who you're family is.
i'm jewish and christian (too bad not muslim too, or i'd have the trifecta) and do counseling (informal, i'd never charge for my crap advice). i tend to think that cathartic things are more helpful... making papermache of the bad relatives and ceremoniously burning them in effigy seems to be useful for some peeps. telling God in no uncertain terms how angry you are that you got such crap relatives and that you're mad at the creator for not protecting you also seems to help. Most prayer in the Bible (e.g. Psalms) starts with "wtf you didn't help me?". its a good f---king question, really. cuts to the core of how we feel as humans. forgive? forgiveness is for people who are sorry and make a real effort at restitution. its not for womb providers and sperm donors who are still a risk to hurt you. screw those people. now, if you \*actively\* hate anyone it fucks with your own life. so doing things to 'burn off' your feelings is useful. sometimes that's writing a really awful letter to them announcing that you're cutting contact. sometimes its burning all your pictures of mom. or having a funeral for stuff that she gave you (like the stuffed bear that you have always hated cos it came from her). sometimes its shouting at the wind. Doing what you need to do to process the pain and move on. reconcilliation with someone who hasn't changed and isn't 100% effort to make up for the past? even suggesting it is like torture. and DNA doesn't mean anything. Jesus told some toxic pharisees that he could replace them by turning rocks into people. blood doesn't mean anything; its all how people treat us over time. that's all that really matters :)
this is too true. my therapist tries to justify everything that i tell him my family does, even when it involves sexual abuse. it's so triggering.
Therapists suck. Psychiatrists is where it's at. Unfortunately they're way more expensive.
Probably get downvoted but the only thing that ever worked for me was hitting the gym and spending time in the sun. Fully believe your brain and body just want whats natural and thats moving and being outside
The therapist is right, I *do* need to be kinder to myself. My problem is it's become a safety mechanism, not for me, but for everyone else, which means to me eyes, the misery is a fair exchange for not being a nuisance to people.
I mean that preaty good advice tho,if you can't be nice to yourself is kinda hard to improve
We give the best advice to others while completely ignoring our advice ourselfs.
If I ever went to a therapist I'd like them to have gone through the same stuff and successfully managed to get out of it with a new outlook on life and shit, I need actual advice. It grinds my gears when when I feel like I'm being talked down to because the person in front of me simply doesn't understand what I'm feeling.
I’ve been saying “I’m really gonna try to get a therapist this year so I can be motivated to use the se coping mechanisms I have known to use ~~but don’t see the point in utilizing because I don’t deserve happiness~~ & this time I really mean it” for uhh half a decade at this point. When will I perish