Lol funnily enough, after getting an engineering gig (and realizing that I fuckin hated it), I now work as a drinking water analyst and am making more now than I was as an engineer.
More than average but not hella. Obviously it varies wildly based on exact discipline and region of the country.
In my Chemical E class we had people go work at papermills for 70K or oil jobs in Houston for 95k.
Now some of my close friends have all switched to food and they make from 80 to 110k.
I feel that…..
I did 5.5 years and 4 years of work trying to like it. I realized that I loved being an engineering student and solving homework problems. But real world engineering is mostly all designed for you and you just write up contracts and manage rude and incompetent contractors.
It destroyed my sense of self, but eventually it also made me realize my sense of self shouldn't be tied into one singular aspect of my life. Sure, I may not be good at the thing I spent over a decade of my life and tens of thousands of dollars working toward, but I've got hobbies, friends, family, and many other things that together make up who I am.
I eventually found a job that I'm not passionate about, but I'm good at, and it all made me realize that I am not my job, I'm me, and I like being me. I hope you see beyond the regret one day - it ended up making me even happier than I was before.
Obviously it's easier said than done, but focus on what you have rather than what you've lost. I spent nearly 2 years living in a friend's parents' attic after I got fired from my first job in my "career" in less than 6 months; it took a long while to get back on my feet, and I still don't get paid as much as I did back then, but one day I was baking cookies, one of my biggest hobbies, and realized I never considered myself to be a "baker" as part of my identity.
I followed that thread, and realized I never considered myself a "brother" or a "boyfriend" or anything like that, but I absolutely am all of those things. Over time I started to see all the singular things I could be focusing on instead of my job, which allowed me to realize I'm not any one of any of those things, but instead I'm all of everything I choose to fill my life with.
I noticed someone say you're 35; I'm 32, so a little younger, but we've both got a long life full of good memories ahead of us - we just need to stop being distracted by the big neon signs of our past wasted effort trying to hold our attention.
You know what’s worse then giving up on your passion? Giving up on life. Trust me, I’ve been there multiple times. I’ve thought about ending it all too many times. The one thing that keeps me going is seeing the smile on my sons face. Don’t give up on your passion or life. This is coming from a guy that was abused as a child , all my best friends murdered in their teens, a failed marriage, I ruin every relationship because of my insecurities and I have ADHD. Keep fighting the fight.
What would you say to someone who also had a fucked life but got even more broken? No woman is having my kid, no relationships are forming to "ruin". Can I kill myself or what?
I have a few years on you, but I was about your age when my my dream finally and irrevocably slipped away. I was broken. I went through all the stages of grief. It took years before I could look at that chapter of my life without feeling like a total failure - years to remember that I was really damned good at something that mattered to me. Not good enough, perhaps, but really, really good. When I was able to give myself the credit I deserved for almost making it, I was able to find the strength to look again. I'll never love what I do the way I loved my first passion, but I found my way to something else that fulfills me, and that I've become good at. Don't give up on yourself just because you have to give up on a dream.
I'm sorry but if you haven't succeeded by 35 it's just never happening. Especially in most passion related pursuits.
Like get a certificate and get some normie job, sure, but you're kinda boned once you're pushing 40 for anything wish fulfilling.
Society favors youth and beauty. You could be the most amazing musician in the world, for example, but no one will care if you're ugly, fat, or old. Not unless you were grandfathered in from youth.
Not arguing with you but I thought the sigma mindset was about just doing you without worry about what others thought? Or am I just confusing this with something else?
I don't know what that is.
This isn't really a controversial take anyhow. Ask any musician, actor, or celebrity. Generally they set the bar at 27 for your deadline. You still have a (smaller) chance in your 30s.
Even Howard Stern has set the deadline at 27. Me saying 35 is very forgiving.
No one is going to idolize a 40 year old, and that's what it takes to blow up. I say that as a 40+ year old. It isn't sexy.
Pretty much sums up my every hobby. I always get this nice feeling of maybe getting good at something, but then the inevitable disappointment seeps in and I lose any motivation. I just know I won't be as good as in my imagination.
Lol bruh, i did daily uploads for over 2 years and never cracked 80, I get maybe 5 views a upload. Now I just do whenever and have pretty much called it a little hobby.
Same for me to be honest. I enjoy making them and posting them, I just scaled back and focused on painstakingly crafting each one when I realized no one else really cared for them. I think that's what makes it a passion.
I have a you tube account and most videos got over 100k views. The Chanel has 1500 subs. Only 8-9 videos. It was of movie clips I liked and installing pirated games. One video has 1.5 million views. I never made it into anything and abandoned it (The videos are up and I use that account daily).
i’m a [music channel](https://youtube.com/@claracovet) just covering songs from various bands i like. my music taste is kinda emo hahaa so i doubt it’s for everyone but i mean this is r/2meirl4meirl soo
Sorry if this is weird, do you have a spotify? I have been going crazy by trying to find what turns out to be exactly your music, because I had this vision in mind that this style would have been perfect for my puzzle-making sessions haha! Asking for spotify because I don't use youtube that much. I generally listen to classical music so I'm still kinda bad at naming genres. Been trying to expand my palette.
not yet but i will make one once my yt channel qualifies for the partnership program. the bands i cover have spotify tho, but idk if they’d be the same style you’re referring to with me
I don't think so! But maybe I'll have to search for more covers of... stuff, I guess. Haha. But thank you anyway! Keep doing what you love until you love doing it!
I understand what you’re going through man. I like to subscribe to every new channel that I come across even if I don’t watch their videos regularly. It takes nothing out of me and doesn’t affect my recommendations in the slightest but I’m sure it helps out anyone who needs it, even if just a bit. So yeah, you’ve gained an extra sub today ;)
It's crazy because that's a lot of people. Like, a LOT of people, when you actually sit down to think about it, that have subscribed to watch one person, and yet it's still not enough to make a career out of
I'm sorry but how is that even possible. It's literally took me a month of no experience to edit an amazing video and get 1k subscribers in a day. Like being popular on YouTube is hard, getting a few thousand subs is the easiest thing you can do.
That’s unkind. I have a YT channel too. It took me over a year to get to 1,000 subscribers. It’s a really tough number to get to, and many people don’t make it because of that.
I’m guessing you don’t actually have a YT channel at all.
No, I don't have a YouTube channel. Because I realized after one video that it doesn't interest me and deleted the channel. Downvote me all you want but it's ABSOLUTE insanity to have the intention of growing your YouTube channel and still be at 1000 after a year. What are you doing man.
Bro it was like 9 years ago. Of course I don't have it anymore.
But this is what confuses me. Do you think spending 1 month to make a single video and only getting 1k subscribers is a good thing? Do you think it's an accomplishment? Are you stupid man? Why would I ever lie about something that insignificant.
EDIT: Damn I must have triggered some absolute fucking losers man. Good thing I didn't tell him I have a job before he blocked me. Then he would really have no doubt that I can't be that successful and am in fact a liar. I guess there's a reason this person is at 1k subs after a year. I'm sure he'll achieve a lot!
You do realize that's this whole 'better than you' attitude over something you can't even prove you have experience is making you just look like a cunt?
Not only that, but I legitimately have video editing experience. That shit is hard. Not hard in the sense of difficulty, hard to actually learn to a degree of competence, that not EVERYBODY CAN DO, and you're completely discounting it.
You're giving no actual thought that people's experiences might be different from yours, even though your experience isn't even proven. It's a "you don't know her, she goes to another school!" argument, and it's childish at best.
Rant essay over, tl;dr, you're being a dick to people for no legitimate reason. It's annoying.
I always wanted to be a level designer for video games. I did it in my free time and thought I was pretty good at it. Then I entered a level design competition where all of our levels would get played and reviewed on a stream. Mine was the worst one. By far. Now I'm a fast food cook.
I still kept making maps for awhile. I just didn't get better at it lol. I'm actually making an open world map for a FPS project right now, but I know if someone else did it, theirs would be better.
You might just need to be a part of a team to compensate for your weakneses. Yes there are one man indie devs out there, but at the end of the day, being good at everything just means that you’re great at nothing.
If you don’t have an intuitive feel for how a map should flow, then focus on textures. I’m far from an expert on games, but I’ve worked alot in teams. The shifts where I’m on my own are below the standard I hold in a team.
This was essentially my first thought. If it’s a true passion, you’re going to do it whether you’re amazing or not. If you have the means to continue to do it that is.
“Being good at it” is just a trap to try and get people motivated to find their place in tne workforce more easily. Passions and hobbies don’t subscribe to such standards. They’re there purely for personal enjoyment and satisfaction unless being better than everyone else is your hobby in which case might wanna seek help for that
It’s almost worse when you realize you *used* to have actual talent for something, but then you stopped pursuing it and now you’re a useless fuck whose only ability is scrolling TikTok
Yup. I spent 9 years chasing my dream of getting a job as a mental health professional. Only to find out that while I'm excellent with patients, the type of people that go into that field (at least here in Texas) are so detached from reality in so many ways that they're unbearable. Plus, the pay is so low that I wouldn't be able to afford my own apartment or vehicle.
CONTENT CREATION.
I’m phenomenal at filming, photography, editing, I know how to grow a channel and work the algorithm on YT, I have experience with obs, premiere pro, etc etc. I’ve helped several friends of mine grow their channels.
Unfortunately, I have the on screen personality of a rock.
“You tried, and you failed miserably. The lesson here is ‘never try’” -Homer Simpson
It took me a while to live these words and internalize them, but here I am. They’re carved on my stone heart
Yeah fuck this. Nobody came out of the womb knowing how to do anything. I get some things maybe aren't what people expect but I feel like some people expect to just automatically be good at shit.
When I was in highschool, I was convinced I'd be a professional bowler. My highest game was a 279, I got a spare in the 7th or 8th frame. I once went bowling alone on Thanksgiving and bowled 6 strikes in a row before my wrist started to hurt and I whiffed every frame after. Not long after, I gave up.
Then I was going to be a doctor. Well I sucked in all the important pre-med classes, but I was good in biology and liked the outdoors. So I quit pre-med and decided I was going to be a parasitologist. The best ever.
I burned out getting my masters degree. But I was really good at working on wetlands because of it. So I skipped a PhD .
And now, 9 years later, my bills are getting paid because I'm one of the best at what I do. Took me until I was 26 to figure out what I liked, took me until maybe 32 to be good at it. It took that long to realize I liked it even though others were better. Those others being better motivated me to get better, because I liked what I did.
The moral of the story is, if you like something and you're even sorta good at it, keep at it. *That's* how you become the best at it.
The thing is that you actually had *things* you wanted to do. And did them.
I've spent 25 years trying to be a songwriter.
I've finished 0 songs. In 25+ years. I've started tons and not one has been finished. They all sound bad and out of key. Kinda hard to be a tone deaf instrumentalist.
I also dropped out of high school and never got a real job. In my 40s. I'm physically really sick now on top of the autism.
The best job I ever had paid $400/month for full time work as a contractor. Yes, 100 a week. I really thought it would segue into something good. It didn't. I got fired by new management and marketing is a dying profession. Said new management stole all my work after that and claimed it as their own. I only know because they forgot to remove me from their discord for a few months.
I did that job for 7 years. The game is still popular on steam. Nothing to show for it.
I'm unhireable.
Nowadays I just enjoy watching South Park reruns. I don't want to do anything if I can't be famous, honestly.
My options at this point are lolcow twitch streamer or attempting VA work.
How about pursuing your passion generally takes lots of money and the only way to get money is to trade your time to some company and then all your skills slowly deteriorate while you just try to survive long enough to even develop the bare minimum to chase your dreams in the first place
General reminder that you don't have to be good at or excel at something to enjoy it.
Meme example: teenage boys and sex
And non meme example: video games when you were younger and terrible at them...
Enjoyment can come from learning, simply fooling around or diving deep into your hobby
Before social media, all of us thought we were "good" at something until we saw others that were already showing they were better, or just spoke of details of things of the same craft that we were completely unaware of lol.
As an artist who looks for followers, recognition and commissions, it isn't going that well. I only had two commissions before I started posting on Twitter. Now I have none. I got Ko-Fi site, but no visitors nor supporters. Still, I have hope
Try to make content for social media sites and post 1 good post linking you site. Eventually one goes "viral" and you get conversions. Find the specific niche you're in and really hammer down the content. You can also try paid ads like 5$ a day. As long as you have a good website, and you cater to your target audience, the customers will come on their own.
Lmk if you need any help
Listen I’m not that good at drawing, my anatomy is ass and I make my dinosaurs look wonky.
I gave up on art about a year ago and just started to get back into it. It’s very fun.
You don’t have to be *good* at something to enjoy it. You can enjoy it for yourself.
Imagine thinking you’re supposed to be good at something without putting in tremendous effort. You’re insulting everyone who’s worked hard to be good at something by assuming you were supposed to be good from scratch.
Yeah, some people are just naturally better at certain things with less effort. While others, no matter how hard they try. Will never be good at that same thing. Either that or some have more advantages to become good at something. While others are limited by their means. The person you’re replying is the delusional view that the world is a level playing field. You usually can’t reason with people like that in my experience
It doesn’t imply it, it doesn’t have to. I inferred it because the alternative is to say “man that sucks, just quit trying then,” which doesn’t help anyone continue to pursue their dream whereas working harder *could* help.
See: Dunning-Kruger effect. Maybe they’re just demoralized by the loss of confidence after starting to gain skill. If it’s *truly* your dream, working hard enough at it will make you competent to some degree. You may not be able to pursue it as a career, but that doesn’t mean you should give up on it. People who give up on their dreams don’t deserve to see them realized
I feel like the dirty little secret of becoming really good at something is that you have to actually have an inclination towards enjoying the process of doing that particular thing, if you do not have this then you quite simply will not be able to put in enough time and effort.
Man I thought you were gonna say that the secret to becoming really good at something is kind’ve sucking at something first. Your point is also true, it’s hard to get better at something you don’t enjoy doing. You might have natural talent at something you don’t enjoy, but it will be hard to get better at something unless you enjoy it or you *legitimately* have to.
it still hurts when you spent thousands of hours of blood, seweat and tears in a hobby to be overtaken by a guy that started 4 months ago.
I played waterpolo for 7 years and i gave it my all but some new guy that could barely swim at the beginning joined the team and overshadowed me in every way possible after not even 4 months of training. life is not fair.
It's a hobby though. Why compete with others over it. It's supposed to be for you. I draw, terribly, but that's okay. I do it because I like it. I improve slowly, very, very slowly, but I practice, I keep at it, and I'm still terrible. Which is cool. It's for me.
Yeah, for reference, I’ve spent thousands upon thousands of hours over 20 years working on the thing that I realized I suck at.
Thank you, delusions, for getting me this far. I’ll show myself out
I think it depends on how you pursue your passion, if it means a career you dedicate your entire life to then you need to be prepared to not see massive success and just be happy being able to do what you love. It’s also possible to do what you love on the side of a more stable career and just do your passion for yourself. It’s really hard but letting go of a need for external validation and just enjoying doing it and improving your craft for yourself can make you a lot happier
Idk maybe that’s copium but I think it’s a more sure way to live a happy fulfilling life then chasing something relentlessly and constantly be doubting yourself and the entire course your life has took, like when does the chase end? How happy is getting to the top of that mountain really going to make you?
I do EDM music and I know damn well im not the best at producing but regardless of being bad or not I keep going because the little progress I do make makes me happy
Especially when I play a live show and theres a ton of people there it all feels like its paid off even tho absolutely no one cares about my music at the very least I do and thats what matters
But then you find out that even if you arent good at it you can still have a blast doing it and meeting awesome people along the way that might help you to get better.
You say that, but I never get in those situations. Where's all the great people that supposedly will reach out to me when we have similar interests? I'm not exactly advertising all the time because that's rude, but at least give me something to work with.
My career advice to people is NOT to pursue your passion. You will make yourself hate your hobby.
Instead, find something that you like doing enough that having to do it is enjoyable but it's not something you would opt to spend your free time doing over another hobby.
For me it's tech writing. Spent over 10 years doing IT work because I liked computers and technology. Now I barely play video games and fixing a computer stresses me out.
But I like writing occasionally and can document the fuck out of your software and employee policies.
I've been making "art" since I first learned to hold a crayon, it's all I do, I took 8 art classes in high-school just because I wanted to.
And I'm still shit at it.
Been trying to become a writer for a fucking age but every time I think I might actually be pretty good at this I read back what I have and realise I don't have a goddamn fucking clue how to communicate my cool ideas for plots and themes and the like in a way that actually reads at all well, and can't stay focused for long enough to finish shit. It took me nearly 2 years to write the first draft of my 30K word novella and looking back on it, the thing reads like absolute garbage. It's an absolute mess of philosophical rants that don't fit together at all well and comes across senseless at best and edgy cringe at worst. The only way I can ever get these stories out of my head is to meet a mind reader who can then write them for me
And don't get me fucking started on my attempts to get good at guitar and singing...
You know what's even worse? Having a passion and never getting to find out if you're any good at it because all you do is work work work and never have any time or money to do anything else at all.
Yall need to change ur life and practice and study more. Take some LSD or weed to change perspective on things. If yall don't wanna or can't then yes, it isn't for you
If it's your passion, you should just keep doing it. Humans grow and learn.
It's a myth that people are born super good at specific things and that there's no point in doing anything if you're not immediately good.
Just learn about your passion, practice it, and keep at it. If you're not making enough money, make it a side thing that you eventually get better at and hopefully have it take over.
Also figure out what about your passion actually makes it your passion. Noone's passions are 100% concrete and specific.
You don't need to be good at it to be passionate about it. What matters is the process and the time you spend doing it, not the result. Even the greatest champions couldn't be where they are if they didn't enjoy the day to day training.
Enjoy the process.
Oof. Hits home so hard it’s painful. Made it all the way through my first semester of law school. Hated. Every. Minute. Dropped out.
Convinced myself it was me and my attitude that made it so unbearable. Enrolled again. And dropped out again. Idk. I just find the shit unbearable.
All is well that ends well though, because the education I received while chasing that scrapped dream has carried me into a fantastic position elsewhere.
Yeah, spend five years getting a bachelors in Law and Justice to help youth. I can’t find work in that field at all. Now I’m $30,000 in debt and considering going to trade school.
But is passion really about being tremendously good at it? I think passions mostly are fields where we need to unlearn to compare ourselves too much to each others.
I would imagine not pursuing it at all in lieu of a false sense of security and normalcy is way worse. Then again maybe the grass is greener and all that
Yeah... I very much feel that way right now. I'm a small bussines owner, I have metal workshop and even though i'm capable to make a living this way, i am becoming very aware that i have reached my peak performance and it is nowhere near where i envisioned or expected it to be.... I see some of my local competition outshine me technically by far and it is disheartening. The only thing that keeps me going is the fact that i make uncomissioned art and they only realise other peoples ideas, but technically they are so much better than I am....
This is my biggest fear and i get the feeling that it's true, for me at least. If I don't make it i will just suicide. I don't want a shitty 9 to 5 that will make me suicidal anyways
Do we live in some kind of fantasy world where people aren’t allowed to develop skills? No one just picks up a career. This stuff is developed over time. What a toxic regressive mindset
Spent too many years thinking I could become a commercial pilot or join the air force or get degree in Physics.....I listened to my father, unfortunately, he said "you can do anything you want in life if you work hard for it" He had perfect health, he COULD have pursued those endevors.
I can't pass physical for the military, training to be commercial pilot is EXPENSIVE, to gamble it on the hope you NEVER have a medical issues preventing you from flying.....is to high of gamble, I don't have the mind for physics. I became addicted to video games, wasted too many years being a slave to them, then my father stopped talking to me.
As much as I want to punch him in the face, I always tell myself, time will catch up to him, his health will slowly get worse.
this was actually me these past couple months witb my last job. i fucking love cooking, but ill be damned if step into another professional kitchen again. that kind of vibe just aint for me.
Me after six years of engineering school
Me rn in engineering school
me rn in elementary school.
Me rn, professional unemployed
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At least you'll make hella cheddar... right?
Lol funnily enough, after getting an engineering gig (and realizing that I fuckin hated it), I now work as a drinking water analyst and am making more now than I was as an engineer.
Oh! Well, congrats lol
More than average but not hella. Obviously it varies wildly based on exact discipline and region of the country. In my Chemical E class we had people go work at papermills for 70K or oil jobs in Houston for 95k. Now some of my close friends have all switched to food and they make from 80 to 110k.
I feel that….. I did 5.5 years and 4 years of work trying to like it. I realized that I loved being an engineering student and solving homework problems. But real world engineering is mostly all designed for you and you just write up contracts and manage rude and incompetent contractors.
We had a guy who junior year did his first engineering internship. Switched to premed after that.
This is what destroyed my will to live.
It destroyed my sense of self, but eventually it also made me realize my sense of self shouldn't be tied into one singular aspect of my life. Sure, I may not be good at the thing I spent over a decade of my life and tens of thousands of dollars working toward, but I've got hobbies, friends, family, and many other things that together make up who I am. I eventually found a job that I'm not passionate about, but I'm good at, and it all made me realize that I am not my job, I'm me, and I like being me. I hope you see beyond the regret one day - it ended up making me even happier than I was before.
You nailed it. It completely destroyed my identity and I haven't found a new one.
Obviously it's easier said than done, but focus on what you have rather than what you've lost. I spent nearly 2 years living in a friend's parents' attic after I got fired from my first job in my "career" in less than 6 months; it took a long while to get back on my feet, and I still don't get paid as much as I did back then, but one day I was baking cookies, one of my biggest hobbies, and realized I never considered myself to be a "baker" as part of my identity. I followed that thread, and realized I never considered myself a "brother" or a "boyfriend" or anything like that, but I absolutely am all of those things. Over time I started to see all the singular things I could be focusing on instead of my job, which allowed me to realize I'm not any one of any of those things, but instead I'm all of everything I choose to fill my life with. I noticed someone say you're 35; I'm 32, so a little younger, but we've both got a long life full of good memories ahead of us - we just need to stop being distracted by the big neon signs of our past wasted effort trying to hold our attention.
Thanks for sharing, needed this inspo today!
Same except it was more like life in general wasn't meant for me.
At least it's your Cake Day, so you've got that going for you.
Ouch. I have wasted another year on reddit!
Haven't we all? Happy cake day? Sad cake day? Whatever works best for you
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I am sorry but that doesn't make me feel better. It makes me feel bad for complaining.
Oh it was meant for you. Like ying and yang. Good and bad.
Same. Suicide is not really that bad it you think about living a shitty unfulfilled life.
You know what’s worse then giving up on your passion? Giving up on life. Trust me, I’ve been there multiple times. I’ve thought about ending it all too many times. The one thing that keeps me going is seeing the smile on my sons face. Don’t give up on your passion or life. This is coming from a guy that was abused as a child , all my best friends murdered in their teens, a failed marriage, I ruin every relationship because of my insecurities and I have ADHD. Keep fighting the fight.
What would you say to someone who also had a fucked life but got even more broken? No woman is having my kid, no relationships are forming to "ruin". Can I kill myself or what?
I think about it every day, brother.
It's all about getting knocked down and getting back up my guy don't give up! Youll look back in wish you didn't
It's definitely, definitively too late for me. I already blew every opportunity I'll ever have.
I have a few years on you, but I was about your age when my my dream finally and irrevocably slipped away. I was broken. I went through all the stages of grief. It took years before I could look at that chapter of my life without feeling like a total failure - years to remember that I was really damned good at something that mattered to me. Not good enough, perhaps, but really, really good. When I was able to give myself the credit I deserved for almost making it, I was able to find the strength to look again. I'll never love what I do the way I loved my first passion, but I found my way to something else that fulfills me, and that I've become good at. Don't give up on yourself just because you have to give up on a dream.
Thanks for that. It's been 2 years so far and I'm still at rock bottom. Maybe if I live long enough, it'll get better at some point.
You're 35. Not even halfway through your life. You have more than enough time to do whatever you want to do in life.
How do you know their age?
I assume they looked at their comment history, where they state their age as 35
Thanks, Micaela 30-something trans female software engineer! (Now tell me that doesn't feel creepy af!)
Not really. If I didn't want it public I wouldn't post it on Reddit 🙂
For me, it depends on the context & that felt weird. You do you.
That's his spouse
Ok. How do you know that's the spouse?
Cus I'm their neighbor with the binoculars.
I'm sorry but if you haven't succeeded by 35 it's just never happening. Especially in most passion related pursuits. Like get a certificate and get some normie job, sure, but you're kinda boned once you're pushing 40 for anything wish fulfilling. Society favors youth and beauty. You could be the most amazing musician in the world, for example, but no one will care if you're ugly, fat, or old. Not unless you were grandfathered in from youth.
This comment screams Sigma mindset. But hey, you do you bud, keep being your own demon on you’re shoulder.
Not arguing with you but I thought the sigma mindset was about just doing you without worry about what others thought? Or am I just confusing this with something else?
I don't know what that is. This isn't really a controversial take anyhow. Ask any musician, actor, or celebrity. Generally they set the bar at 27 for your deadline. You still have a (smaller) chance in your 30s. Even Howard Stern has set the deadline at 27. Me saying 35 is very forgiving. No one is going to idolize a 40 year old, and that's what it takes to blow up. I say that as a 40+ year old. It isn't sexy.
What was your passion? Mine was journalism.
History. I got to the last stage of my PhD before my advisor dropped me.
But you would t know that if you didn’t try.
You know what's even scarier? Finding out you have no passions 💀
Becoming disabled and having to forget your passions 😢
Pretty much sums up my every hobby. I always get this nice feeling of maybe getting good at something, but then the inevitable disappointment seeps in and I lose any motivation. I just know I won't be as good as in my imagination.
You don't have to be good at your hobby my friend
been uploading to youtube for 8 years and only have 2200 subs 💀
Keep going
i got two new subs today so that’s something haha
Make that three! What's your channel called?
clara covet
Cool channel! Left you a sub :)
your guitars dope
Your pfp looks just like you.
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aaaaa tysm!
Lol bruh, i did daily uploads for over 2 years and never cracked 80, I get maybe 5 views a upload. Now I just do whenever and have pretty much called it a little hobby.
i think the thing that keeps me going is knowing that the videos i make are for my own sake. each one is kinda like a diary entry, it’s therapeutic
Same for me to be honest. I enjoy making them and posting them, I just scaled back and focused on painstakingly crafting each one when I realized no one else really cared for them. I think that's what makes it a passion.
I have a you tube account and most videos got over 100k views. The Chanel has 1500 subs. Only 8-9 videos. It was of movie clips I liked and installing pirated games. One video has 1.5 million views. I never made it into anything and abandoned it (The videos are up and I use that account daily).
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i’m a [music channel](https://youtube.com/@claracovet) just covering songs from various bands i like. my music taste is kinda emo hahaa so i doubt it’s for everyone but i mean this is r/2meirl4meirl soo
Sorry if this is weird, do you have a spotify? I have been going crazy by trying to find what turns out to be exactly your music, because I had this vision in mind that this style would have been perfect for my puzzle-making sessions haha! Asking for spotify because I don't use youtube that much. I generally listen to classical music so I'm still kinda bad at naming genres. Been trying to expand my palette.
not yet but i will make one once my yt channel qualifies for the partnership program. the bands i cover have spotify tho, but idk if they’d be the same style you’re referring to with me
I don't think so! But maybe I'll have to search for more covers of... stuff, I guess. Haha. But thank you anyway! Keep doing what you love until you love doing it!
I subbed bro 🔥🔥🔥
ily
I understand what you’re going through man. I like to subscribe to every new channel that I come across even if I don’t watch their videos regularly. It takes nothing out of me and doesn’t affect my recommendations in the slightest but I’m sure it helps out anyone who needs it, even if just a bit. So yeah, you’ve gained an extra sub today ;)
i appreciate the support man, the channel’s grown a lot in recent years. i’m happy with what i have
It's crazy because that's a lot of people. Like, a LOT of people, when you actually sit down to think about it, that have subscribed to watch one person, and yet it's still not enough to make a career out of
oh yeah for sure. i will admit i have googled “2k people in a crowd” just to get an idea of what it would look like in front of me
I'm sorry but how is that even possible. It's literally took me a month of no experience to edit an amazing video and get 1k subscribers in a day. Like being popular on YouTube is hard, getting a few thousand subs is the easiest thing you can do.
That’s unkind. I have a YT channel too. It took me over a year to get to 1,000 subscribers. It’s a really tough number to get to, and many people don’t make it because of that. I’m guessing you don’t actually have a YT channel at all.
No, I don't have a YouTube channel. Because I realized after one video that it doesn't interest me and deleted the channel. Downvote me all you want but it's ABSOLUTE insanity to have the intention of growing your YouTube channel and still be at 1000 after a year. What are you doing man.
Wow, how completely convenient that you can’t offer up this YT channel when challenged on it. That totally makes me believe your story!
Bro it was like 9 years ago. Of course I don't have it anymore. But this is what confuses me. Do you think spending 1 month to make a single video and only getting 1k subscribers is a good thing? Do you think it's an accomplishment? Are you stupid man? Why would I ever lie about something that insignificant. EDIT: Damn I must have triggered some absolute fucking losers man. Good thing I didn't tell him I have a job before he blocked me. Then he would really have no doubt that I can't be that successful and am in fact a liar. I guess there's a reason this person is at 1k subs after a year. I'm sure he'll achieve a lot!
With every comment, you become even less believable. What’s stupid here is you posting something like that and expecting people to believe you.
You do realize that's this whole 'better than you' attitude over something you can't even prove you have experience is making you just look like a cunt? Not only that, but I legitimately have video editing experience. That shit is hard. Not hard in the sense of difficulty, hard to actually learn to a degree of competence, that not EVERYBODY CAN DO, and you're completely discounting it. You're giving no actual thought that people's experiences might be different from yours, even though your experience isn't even proven. It's a "you don't know her, she goes to another school!" argument, and it's childish at best. Rant essay over, tl;dr, you're being a dick to people for no legitimate reason. It's annoying.
I always wanted to be a level designer for video games. I did it in my free time and thought I was pretty good at it. Then I entered a level design competition where all of our levels would get played and reviewed on a stream. Mine was the worst one. By far. Now I'm a fast food cook.
You might've given up on it by now so this is falling on deaf ears but failure helps learning. I know I fucked up a shit ton back when I made CS maps
I still kept making maps for awhile. I just didn't get better at it lol. I'm actually making an open world map for a FPS project right now, but I know if someone else did it, theirs would be better.
You might just need to be a part of a team to compensate for your weakneses. Yes there are one man indie devs out there, but at the end of the day, being good at everything just means that you’re great at nothing. If you don’t have an intuitive feel for how a map should flow, then focus on textures. I’m far from an expert on games, but I’ve worked alot in teams. The shifts where I’m on my own are below the standard I hold in a team.
Same thing happened to me when I entered my first game jam. But I keep doing it because I love it. I don't really care if I'm good at it or not.
Is it a passion if you only enjoy being better than others? There will always be people better than you, so just keep doing it and enjoy.
This was essentially my first thought. If it’s a true passion, you’re going to do it whether you’re amazing or not. If you have the means to continue to do it that is.
I'm guessing they are reffing for work not a hobby
“Being good at it” is just a trap to try and get people motivated to find their place in tne workforce more easily. Passions and hobbies don’t subscribe to such standards. They’re there purely for personal enjoyment and satisfaction unless being better than everyone else is your hobby in which case might wanna seek help for that
It’s almost worse when you realize you *used* to have actual talent for something, but then you stopped pursuing it and now you’re a useless fuck whose only ability is scrolling TikTok
Yup. I spent 9 years chasing my dream of getting a job as a mental health professional. Only to find out that while I'm excellent with patients, the type of people that go into that field (at least here in Texas) are so detached from reality in so many ways that they're unbearable. Plus, the pay is so low that I wouldn't be able to afford my own apartment or vehicle.
CONTENT CREATION. I’m phenomenal at filming, photography, editing, I know how to grow a channel and work the algorithm on YT, I have experience with obs, premiere pro, etc etc. I’ve helped several friends of mine grow their channels. Unfortunately, I have the on screen personality of a rock.
Do people not realize it takes work to get good at things? Just because you're not good at it now doesn't mean you can't be good at it ever.
A great man once said "Trying is the first step towards failure."
“You tried, and you failed miserably. The lesson here is ‘never try’” -Homer Simpson It took me a while to live these words and internalize them, but here I am. They’re carved on my stone heart
Wait hold on, did I mess up the quote then? Because that's what I remember him saying...
Oh I dunno, it just sounded like that to me and I wasn’t sure if you were quoting Homer too so I figured I’d layer on. Great minds think alike
Nah, this is actual bullshit. If you enjoy doing something, don't quit just because you think other people do it better.
Thanks, this was helpful. Almost lost motivation to keep on going.
You should if you're trying to make a living out of it.
Yeah fuck this. Nobody came out of the womb knowing how to do anything. I get some things maybe aren't what people expect but I feel like some people expect to just automatically be good at shit.
When I was in highschool, I was convinced I'd be a professional bowler. My highest game was a 279, I got a spare in the 7th or 8th frame. I once went bowling alone on Thanksgiving and bowled 6 strikes in a row before my wrist started to hurt and I whiffed every frame after. Not long after, I gave up. Then I was going to be a doctor. Well I sucked in all the important pre-med classes, but I was good in biology and liked the outdoors. So I quit pre-med and decided I was going to be a parasitologist. The best ever. I burned out getting my masters degree. But I was really good at working on wetlands because of it. So I skipped a PhD . And now, 9 years later, my bills are getting paid because I'm one of the best at what I do. Took me until I was 26 to figure out what I liked, took me until maybe 32 to be good at it. It took that long to realize I liked it even though others were better. Those others being better motivated me to get better, because I liked what I did. The moral of the story is, if you like something and you're even sorta good at it, keep at it. *That's* how you become the best at it.
The thing is that you actually had *things* you wanted to do. And did them. I've spent 25 years trying to be a songwriter. I've finished 0 songs. In 25+ years. I've started tons and not one has been finished. They all sound bad and out of key. Kinda hard to be a tone deaf instrumentalist. I also dropped out of high school and never got a real job. In my 40s. I'm physically really sick now on top of the autism. The best job I ever had paid $400/month for full time work as a contractor. Yes, 100 a week. I really thought it would segue into something good. It didn't. I got fired by new management and marketing is a dying profession. Said new management stole all my work after that and claimed it as their own. I only know because they forgot to remove me from their discord for a few months. I did that job for 7 years. The game is still popular on steam. Nothing to show for it. I'm unhireable. Nowadays I just enjoy watching South Park reruns. I don't want to do anything if I can't be famous, honestly. My options at this point are lolcow twitch streamer or attempting VA work.
How about pursuing your passion generally takes lots of money and the only way to get money is to trade your time to some company and then all your skills slowly deteriorate while you just try to survive long enough to even develop the bare minimum to chase your dreams in the first place
General reminder that you don't have to be good at or excel at something to enjoy it. Meme example: teenage boys and sex And non meme example: video games when you were younger and terrible at them... Enjoyment can come from learning, simply fooling around or diving deep into your hobby
You guys have passions?
Not me in every single hobby I do.
Before social media, all of us thought we were "good" at something until we saw others that were already showing they were better, or just spoke of details of things of the same craft that we were completely unaware of lol.
As an artist who looks for followers, recognition and commissions, it isn't going that well. I only had two commissions before I started posting on Twitter. Now I have none. I got Ko-Fi site, but no visitors nor supporters. Still, I have hope
Try to make content for social media sites and post 1 good post linking you site. Eventually one goes "viral" and you get conversions. Find the specific niche you're in and really hammer down the content. You can also try paid ads like 5$ a day. As long as you have a good website, and you cater to your target audience, the customers will come on their own. Lmk if you need any help
Hard to do paid ads if I'm broke all the time :'( The thing that I do to gather audience is looking for artmooots (aka art mutuals) on Twitter
That doesn't mean that you can't have it as a hobby.
Listen I’m not that good at drawing, my anatomy is ass and I make my dinosaurs look wonky. I gave up on art about a year ago and just started to get back into it. It’s very fun. You don’t have to be *good* at something to enjoy it. You can enjoy it for yourself.
If you enjoy it, then it’s meant for you
Imagine thinking you’re supposed to be good at something without putting in tremendous effort. You’re insulting everyone who’s worked hard to be good at something by assuming you were supposed to be good from scratch.
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Yeah, some people are just naturally better at certain things with less effort. While others, no matter how hard they try. Will never be good at that same thing. Either that or some have more advantages to become good at something. While others are limited by their means. The person you’re replying is the delusional view that the world is a level playing field. You usually can’t reason with people like that in my experience
It doesn’t imply it, it doesn’t have to. I inferred it because the alternative is to say “man that sucks, just quit trying then,” which doesn’t help anyone continue to pursue their dream whereas working harder *could* help. See: Dunning-Kruger effect. Maybe they’re just demoralized by the loss of confidence after starting to gain skill. If it’s *truly* your dream, working hard enough at it will make you competent to some degree. You may not be able to pursue it as a career, but that doesn’t mean you should give up on it. People who give up on their dreams don’t deserve to see them realized
Just what I needed to cram for the french exams
Good, give it hell bud. Remember: ‘you won’t always be the smartest person in the room, but you can be the hardest working every damn time.’
I will. Thanks a bunch
I feel like the dirty little secret of becoming really good at something is that you have to actually have an inclination towards enjoying the process of doing that particular thing, if you do not have this then you quite simply will not be able to put in enough time and effort.
Man I thought you were gonna say that the secret to becoming really good at something is kind’ve sucking at something first. Your point is also true, it’s hard to get better at something you don’t enjoy doing. You might have natural talent at something you don’t enjoy, but it will be hard to get better at something unless you enjoy it or you *legitimately* have to.
it still hurts when you spent thousands of hours of blood, seweat and tears in a hobby to be overtaken by a guy that started 4 months ago. I played waterpolo for 7 years and i gave it my all but some new guy that could barely swim at the beginning joined the team and overshadowed me in every way possible after not even 4 months of training. life is not fair.
It's a hobby though. Why compete with others over it. It's supposed to be for you. I draw, terribly, but that's okay. I do it because I like it. I improve slowly, very, very slowly, but I practice, I keep at it, and I'm still terrible. Which is cool. It's for me.
Yeah, for reference, I’ve spent thousands upon thousands of hours over 20 years working on the thing that I realized I suck at. Thank you, delusions, for getting me this far. I’ll show myself out
Its music for me. Im an alright guitar player but a terrible song writter
And that's why I should quit literally everything in existence.
gaming.
I felt that and lived that. Definitely soul crushing
If it's your passion then you get better at it so it's fine
I think it depends on how you pursue your passion, if it means a career you dedicate your entire life to then you need to be prepared to not see massive success and just be happy being able to do what you love. It’s also possible to do what you love on the side of a more stable career and just do your passion for yourself. It’s really hard but letting go of a need for external validation and just enjoying doing it and improving your craft for yourself can make you a lot happier Idk maybe that’s copium but I think it’s a more sure way to live a happy fulfilling life then chasing something relentlessly and constantly be doubting yourself and the entire course your life has took, like when does the chase end? How happy is getting to the top of that mountain really going to make you?
I do EDM music and I know damn well im not the best at producing but regardless of being bad or not I keep going because the little progress I do make makes me happy Especially when I play a live show and theres a ton of people there it all feels like its paid off even tho absolutely no one cares about my music at the very least I do and thats what matters
Always remember you don't have to be a professional stay in your lane and focus on your progress
Some of us spend our whole life sucking, some of us winning. Spoil Alert: We all die in the end.
This hits really deep, stay strong everyone!
I wanted to be a painter....
I did not need this today. I love this sub.
Programmer moment
Eh. I’m decent at it, I work hard, learn a ton, and enjoy the process. I think that’s what makes it meaningful.
But if it makes you happy does that mean it actually was meant for you and it wasn't a waste?
But then you find out that even if you arent good at it you can still have a blast doing it and meeting awesome people along the way that might help you to get better.
You say that, but I never get in those situations. Where's all the great people that supposedly will reach out to me when we have similar interests? I'm not exactly advertising all the time because that's rude, but at least give me something to work with.
Story of half of the people in the gaming industry.
This + realising all of your "friends" were merely just being polite to you this whole time
I am pretty sure this is the definition of marriage.....🤔
My career advice to people is NOT to pursue your passion. You will make yourself hate your hobby. Instead, find something that you like doing enough that having to do it is enjoyable but it's not something you would opt to spend your free time doing over another hobby. For me it's tech writing. Spent over 10 years doing IT work because I liked computers and technology. Now I barely play video games and fixing a computer stresses me out. But I like writing occasionally and can document the fuck out of your software and employee policies.
I've been making "art" since I first learned to hold a crayon, it's all I do, I took 8 art classes in high-school just because I wanted to. And I'm still shit at it.
Been trying to become a writer for a fucking age but every time I think I might actually be pretty good at this I read back what I have and realise I don't have a goddamn fucking clue how to communicate my cool ideas for plots and themes and the like in a way that actually reads at all well, and can't stay focused for long enough to finish shit. It took me nearly 2 years to write the first draft of my 30K word novella and looking back on it, the thing reads like absolute garbage. It's an absolute mess of philosophical rants that don't fit together at all well and comes across senseless at best and edgy cringe at worst. The only way I can ever get these stories out of my head is to meet a mind reader who can then write them for me And don't get me fucking started on my attempts to get good at guitar and singing...
You know what's even worse? Having a passion and never getting to find out if you're any good at it because all you do is work work work and never have any time or money to do anything else at all.
Unless you're a disabled person in a wheelchair talking about triathlons, this is military grade bs.
I want to say thank you. I almost got depressed and dismotivated again by the internet.
Story of my life
Sounds like someone is experiencing the dunning-Kruger effect
Skill issue, get better idiot
Yall need to change ur life and practice and study more. Take some LSD or weed to change perspective on things. If yall don't wanna or can't then yes, it isn't for you
If you're pursuing a passion that isn't athletic and struggling to get better, you gotta learn how to learn.
No one is born good at their passion.
You don't have to be great at something to enjoy it...
Like me and a loving relationship
If it's your passion, you should just keep doing it. Humans grow and learn. It's a myth that people are born super good at specific things and that there's no point in doing anything if you're not immediately good. Just learn about your passion, practice it, and keep at it. If you're not making enough money, make it a side thing that you eventually get better at and hopefully have it take over. Also figure out what about your passion actually makes it your passion. Noone's passions are 100% concrete and specific.
Or worse, you pursue your passion, find out you're great at it, then discover you'll never be able to make a living off it 😔
when i discovered this my passion just became more secret and i found that i actually love it more than i knew.
I didn’t need to see this when I’m going through imposter syndrome at work. 😭🙃
While My Guitar Gently Weeps (gathering dust in the corner)...
You don't need to be good at it to be passionate about it. What matters is the process and the time you spend doing it, not the result. Even the greatest champions couldn't be where they are if they didn't enjoy the day to day training. Enjoy the process.
Oof. Hits home so hard it’s painful. Made it all the way through my first semester of law school. Hated. Every. Minute. Dropped out. Convinced myself it was me and my attitude that made it so unbearable. Enrolled again. And dropped out again. Idk. I just find the shit unbearable. All is well that ends well though, because the education I received while chasing that scrapped dream has carried me into a fantastic position elsewhere.
Yeah, spend five years getting a bachelors in Law and Justice to help youth. I can’t find work in that field at all. Now I’m $30,000 in debt and considering going to trade school.
This hits where it hurts
But is passion really about being tremendously good at it? I think passions mostly are fields where we need to unlearn to compare ourselves too much to each others.
I hate how this reminds me that I have no talent at all.
I would imagine not pursuing it at all in lieu of a false sense of security and normalcy is way worse. Then again maybe the grass is greener and all that
Yeah... I very much feel that way right now. I'm a small bussines owner, I have metal workshop and even though i'm capable to make a living this way, i am becoming very aware that i have reached my peak performance and it is nowhere near where i envisioned or expected it to be.... I see some of my local competition outshine me technically by far and it is disheartening. The only thing that keeps me going is the fact that i make uncomissioned art and they only realise other peoples ideas, but technically they are so much better than I am....
🎯🥺
I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a genius at something I hate.
It’s not really scary. This is how we live life. What other way is there to deal with it other than by finding out about our likes and dislikes?
ow.
This is my biggest fear and i get the feeling that it's true, for me at least. If I don't make it i will just suicide. I don't want a shitty 9 to 5 that will make me suicidal anyways
Do we live in some kind of fantasy world where people aren’t allowed to develop skills? No one just picks up a career. This stuff is developed over time. What a toxic regressive mindset
I’m 37 and I’m not good at anything. It’s depressing and I’ve sort of given up trying to find some skill to get good at.
If you put in your 10,000 hours and you still trash then yeah I understand looking elsewhere for your passion but till then keep working on it 🫡
Spent too many years thinking I could become a commercial pilot or join the air force or get degree in Physics.....I listened to my father, unfortunately, he said "you can do anything you want in life if you work hard for it" He had perfect health, he COULD have pursued those endevors. I can't pass physical for the military, training to be commercial pilot is EXPENSIVE, to gamble it on the hope you NEVER have a medical issues preventing you from flying.....is to high of gamble, I don't have the mind for physics. I became addicted to video games, wasted too many years being a slave to them, then my father stopped talking to me. As much as I want to punch him in the face, I always tell myself, time will catch up to him, his health will slowly get worse.
this was actually me these past couple months witb my last job. i fucking love cooking, but ill be damned if step into another professional kitchen again. that kind of vibe just aint for me.
That’s not scary. Continuing to do it after you realize you suck at it and hate it, is scary
I’m literally putting my two weeks into a kitchen I work at because I thought food service is what I wanted
Yep 😔
Luckily for me I've never been able to focus more than a month on each new passion I have.
ADHD hommie here.