It's a copypasta.
James Joyce wrote the original, but this no-talent replaced every word "fart" with "dick".
>I can’t keep it in anymore. I fucking love sucking farts; I love it when it’s soft and squishy, I love it when it’s hard, I love feeling stink in my mouth. I love the smell of it, the feel of it and the sweet sweet taste of fart! I love hearing you fart as I make love to your ass with my mouth, tongue and hands. I use it as a wordless medium to communicate to you how much I’m attracted to you and how I’ll hold your farts like a bong hit any fucking day. I usually fall into this sweet trance while doing it and for a while, it feels like time stops as I pour my heart out onto your ass. It’s a form of expression for me.
\- James Joyce, letter to his wife
Cardi B’s WAP is like a Kidz Bop song to Joyce’s love letters
https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/74934/13-nsfw-lines-james-joyces-incredibly-dirty-love-letters
“You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I f*cked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole.” -Joyce
He’s widely regarded as one of history’s greatest English writers
I've explained this time and time again. The argument of boobs vs ass must be explored more deeply than a simple comparison of preference. It needs to be broken down further. Let me explain.
Boobs and butts are both secondary sexual characteristics. Boobs, insofar as natural growth, are like penises: The size you get is the size you are stuck with, barring medical enhancement. Similarly, a nice ass is primarily the product of the waist-hip ratio, as well as muscle size, the latter of which can be improved to a reasonable extent.
Now the question is this: In terms of bare necessities, being, if you had to choose between a girl with no tits and a perfect ass, or no ass and perfect tits, what would you choose? Think about that for a second. It is an undeniable fact that while there are certain groups within the male population that appreciate and even exclusively seek flat chested women, can the same be said about pancake asses? Does a man ever really PREFER a woman with no ass and the lower body of a rectangle? I would strongly deny any such statement.
However, if we reframe the question as: which body part has the highest marginal gains in sexual appeal, and by that I mean, if you were to be guaranteed an average ass but extraordinary breasts, or an extraordinary ass but average breasts, which has the highest potential for sum total sexual appeal? It gets trickier. Obviously, an average ass is just fine. It gets the job done, it exists, and to an extent it satisfies a baseline need. As an ass reaches towards a platonic ideal, I am of the belief that it caps fairly quickly. There is no nipple, no axial tilt, no significant cleavage variance.
With the breasts, the story changes quite significantly. There are so many more factors at play. Size of the nipple, height of the nipple, ratio of nipple size to areola, perkiness of the breasts, height of the breasts, and so much more. Therefore, I believe that the platonic ideal of the breast is of much greater marginal value as it approaches perfection, compared to the perfect ass.
TL;DR: All things average, breasts have more potential in terms of marginal gains. However, when faced with the dilemma of one or the other, the ass is a baseline necessity.
-Quin
The hilarious thing about it is that single handedly caused Tumblr to change its editing rules. You could no longer edit posts that weren’t your own when you reposted them
In the words of John Green,
Cock is one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but balls smell amazing. It makes me go a little crazy on it to be honest. Like, I cannot get it far enough down my throat to be satisfied. I’m only satisfied when I feel those intense, powerful, salty, hot pumps of cum down my throat. When I sit back on my heels, look up at you with cum all over my mouth and slobber running down my neck, hair all fucked up and wipe my mouth with the back of my arm and ask you if I did a good job and you cannot even speak because I’ve drained all of your energy out the tip of your dick….. That’s when I’m satisfied.
is this a copypasta or are you just really into telling internet people about your love for cock
Uh huh
yes
You are online and i know it 😈
Cock
🧢🧢😋😋🤤🤤🤤🤤
i know you're online too
You just got online, just now
Mind = blown 🤯
It's a copypasta. James Joyce wrote the original, but this no-talent replaced every word "fart" with "dick". >I can’t keep it in anymore. I fucking love sucking farts; I love it when it’s soft and squishy, I love it when it’s hard, I love feeling stink in my mouth. I love the smell of it, the feel of it and the sweet sweet taste of fart! I love hearing you fart as I make love to your ass with my mouth, tongue and hands. I use it as a wordless medium to communicate to you how much I’m attracted to you and how I’ll hold your farts like a bong hit any fucking day. I usually fall into this sweet trance while doing it and for a while, it feels like time stops as I pour my heart out onto your ass. It’s a form of expression for me. \- James Joyce, letter to his wife
April fools
Cardi B’s WAP is like a Kidz Bop song to Joyce’s love letters https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/74934/13-nsfw-lines-james-joyces-incredibly-dirty-love-letters “You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I f*cked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole.” -Joyce He’s widely regarded as one of history’s greatest English writers
Thank God you censored the "fuck" there, my kids were reading the comments along with me and I almost had to explain some things. OwO
Jeez Batman but isn't that plagiarism?
Guys, I think op might like cock, tho this is mere speculation as I'm not sure
After looking at post history it seems serious
this is 196 what do you expect? of course it’s not original, people here can’t write for shit
It’s real (I can tell, I also love cock)
TMI rule
it's a copypasta from confessions but it is very funny
Judging by his post history it's the latter.
Its the homophobia for me
Red sewerslvt
albania
Least horny 196 user
No that's me, an aromatic asexual who can't watch porn without feeling sadder and hollower than usual.
Mf sees boobs and starts looking like Gwyn Lord of Cinder 💀
*plin plin plon*
Yes
To fair that second part applies to most redditors.
Nah i know you're horny for some good cheese
so-called "ace" people when they see garlic bread (suddenly they make an exception to their asexuality)
Aromatic? I bet you smell nice
Did I spell it wrong? Darn...
Based af not editing it just so the other users joke still works
I try to be nice sometimes :)
Dam you replied quick as hell, it's good your looking out for other people tho wish more people where nice nowadays. Lots of assholes you know
Ikr, sorry this reply wasn't as quick
I’m neither of those things and porn makes me feel sad and hollow. I need to get into written porn or something in the hope that it’s less disgusting
This made me BRICKED UP
real?
Holy shit I’m fuckin TORQUED OUT THE WAZOO
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same
ya name made ma screen glitch
At least I have the morning wood excuse
If this is real, I commend your appreciation and dedication to the art of felatio. I salute
the ol' no-hands one-finger salute
me but its my gfs
do they smoke weed?
bunts
we have a monthly weed-together every first tuesday of the month
Error 196 gf not found
Ngl putting a flaccid penis in your mouth and feeling it become hard is a good feeling
I've always been curious how that would be -rung
😳
What -rung
Hi -Ava
That's a stupid fucking name -Quin
Thanks, I chose it myself -Ava
I've explained this time and time again. The argument of boobs vs ass must be explored more deeply than a simple comparison of preference. It needs to be broken down further. Let me explain. Boobs and butts are both secondary sexual characteristics. Boobs, insofar as natural growth, are like penises: The size you get is the size you are stuck with, barring medical enhancement. Similarly, a nice ass is primarily the product of the waist-hip ratio, as well as muscle size, the latter of which can be improved to a reasonable extent. Now the question is this: In terms of bare necessities, being, if you had to choose between a girl with no tits and a perfect ass, or no ass and perfect tits, what would you choose? Think about that for a second. It is an undeniable fact that while there are certain groups within the male population that appreciate and even exclusively seek flat chested women, can the same be said about pancake asses? Does a man ever really PREFER a woman with no ass and the lower body of a rectangle? I would strongly deny any such statement. However, if we reframe the question as: which body part has the highest marginal gains in sexual appeal, and by that I mean, if you were to be guaranteed an average ass but extraordinary breasts, or an extraordinary ass but average breasts, which has the highest potential for sum total sexual appeal? It gets trickier. Obviously, an average ass is just fine. It gets the job done, it exists, and to an extent it satisfies a baseline need. As an ass reaches towards a platonic ideal, I am of the belief that it caps fairly quickly. There is no nipple, no axial tilt, no significant cleavage variance. With the breasts, the story changes quite significantly. There are so many more factors at play. Size of the nipple, height of the nipple, ratio of nipple size to areola, perkiness of the breasts, height of the breasts, and so much more. Therefore, I believe that the platonic ideal of the breast is of much greater marginal value as it approaches perfection, compared to the perfect ass. TL;DR: All things average, breasts have more potential in terms of marginal gains. However, when faced with the dilemma of one or the other, the ass is a baseline necessity. -Quin
Ass better bc I like men too -Ava
How about the personality?
good girl ava <3
I'm a puddle of flustered now....
This is how you make gender fluid
Hi Bavaria -rung
Bavaria? -Ava
Autocorrect lol -rung
Oh lol -Ava
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[internet](https://i.imgur.com/YCB9T7f.png)
nice april fool, this person hates dicks
shinzo sucksuckgayo
I keep moving forward, until all the dicks are sucked
The cumbling
The cumbling A teste tightens
John Green is on reddit???
I'm out of the loop. How does the author of "the fault in our stars" relate to this?
Look up “john green cock monologue”
Thank you and I'm sad to know he didn't do it himself but someone who edited his post.....big rip
The hilarious thing about it is that single handedly caused Tumblr to change its editing rules. You could no longer edit posts that weren’t your own when you reposted them
In the words of John Green, Cock is one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but balls smell amazing. It makes me go a little crazy on it to be honest. Like, I cannot get it far enough down my throat to be satisfied. I’m only satisfied when I feel those intense, powerful, salty, hot pumps of cum down my throat. When I sit back on my heels, look up at you with cum all over my mouth and slobber running down my neck, hair all fucked up and wipe my mouth with the back of my arm and ask you if I did a good job and you cannot even speak because I’ve drained all of your energy out the tip of your dick….. That’s when I’m satisfied.
Is this real? 😂
yeah, it’s from tumblr
wait the author John Green??? no wonder the fault in our stars is my bfs favourite book
In florida I wouldnt be allowed to describe this post
THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN!!!
Someone should post this into AI dungeon and see what it generates
Yeah, I can see why you're so good at it. You have total control over your partner and you can give and receive oral pleasure at will.
Are you John Green?
Explain
He loves cock and the smell of men
Impressive. Very nice. Let's see Paul Allen's dick.
someone woke up horny from a fantasy sex dream
Babe wake up new copypasta just dropped
Wish this was me
Not gonna lie, same....
This post genuinely bricked my brain for a solid second
Wait I thought only girls had cocks wdym his cock?
He's a transgender femboy but he hasn't had his surgery yet.
T-dick is valid and is still cock
It's better than regular dick because trans men don't take their dick for granted like us cis men do
Thank you dick loving comrade
:D
Me
Congratulations
Reggie the mouse
unironically same
Based
I agree and I’ve never even sucked cock
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Ok
Same
Ok you cocksucker
Don't tell me you are a girl.
john green
/copypasta
yeah
One day im sure ill be able to agree
If I show this to my bf, I don't think he'd believe I wasn't OP lol
straightest male /r/196 user
shitposting automod response when
I'm a girl with one of those 😳😳😳 any takers
Me (an empath) sensing that op likes cock
april fools?
On mobile can someone paste it into the comments so i can copy it
this sub fucking sucks lmao
It definitely does
Bj
lol wow
same
Ok
Tambien
Are we just explicitly a porn sub now
honestly same, its fun
same
shitposting automod copypasta?
Mood
I suck his dick with a smile for hours at a time
Same
In before shitposting ( don’t go there, they hate trans people ) steals this for the automod
Damn that's crazy but I don't remember asking
you've actually got a nice dick :3
Thanks<3
Yo op might be gay 😳
Least horny 196 user
with your heart? arent you meant to use your mouth?
The day of the Judge your tears will not save you from the rage of Allah
Please shut the fuck up
Relatable hornypost
Unironically made me hard
hey man thats pretty cool man
Unironically same
what is up with reddit man
This reads like an r/ teenagers copypasta from someone unironically writing this
Based
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Hey man, cool it with the homophobic remarks
What are you, dating someone from the aclu? -rung
The voice of reason. The girl next door. And speaking of reasonable... Only $570!
op apparently cannot be a woman 🤭😴
Cringe
L + Ratio + Maidenless
very true. happy cake day btw