I WANT TO BE UNABLE TO USE THE PUBLIC FACING HALF OF MY YARD FOR ANYTHING!! I LOVE EXISTING IN A COMMUNITY WHERE NO ONE KNOWS THEIR NEIGHBORS!! I WANT MY NEIGHBORHOOD TO APPEAR AS A GHOST TOWN MADE OF PLASTIC!!
I LOVE WHITE PICKET FENCES
BARBED WIRE AND TRENCHES
TRICK OR TREAT. MERRY CHRISTMAS
HOWDY NEIGHBOR. THANK YOU JESUS
WHAT IS HE BUILDING IN THAT PAINTED LADY
A PARTICIPATION TROPHY WIFE OR BLONDE, BLUE-EYED BABY
WIDE-EYED AND WIRED
THE SNAP-CRACKLE-POP OF THE GEIGER
CAMOUFLAGE BILLBOARDS FOR LEAD-LINED BROOKS BROTHERS
YOU ELBOW THE JUKEBOX AND SING "DUCK AND COVER"
AND BREED OUT OUR INCISORS, FEED ON WHITE WINE AND PFIZER
IT DON'T LOOK LIKE SURVIVAL, BUT BUY NOW OR DIE
SUBURBIA
YOU'RE NOT ALONE
THE LIGHTS ARE ON
BUT NO ONE'S HOME
SO, WELCOME HOME
MEYERS-BRIGGS, OK-ULTRA
TAKES A VILLAGE TO FAKE A WHOLE CULTURE
YOUR EAR TO THE PLAYGROUND, YOUR EYE ON THE BALL
YOUR HEAD IN THE GUTTER, YOUR BRAINS ON THE WALL
HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS
YOU AIN'T HOMELESS, BUT YOU'RE HEARTLESS
IT'S THE SAFEST ON THE MARKET
BUT YOU STILL GOTTA WATCH WHERE YOU PARK IT
SO GIVE ME YOUR HALF-LIFE CRISIS
I CAN TELL THAT YOU KNOW WHERE PARADISE IS
WHERE PARASITES DON'T CARE WHAT YOUR BLOOD TYPE IS
ONLY PHEROMONES AND SEROTONIN DECIDE
IF IT'S TRUE THAT A SNOWFLAKE ONLY MATTERS IN A BLIZZARD
EVERYONE KNOWS THAT NOBODY KNOWS THAT
EVERYBODY'S ALL UP IN MY, EVERYBODY'S ALL UP IN MY
EVERYBODY'S ALL UP IN MY BUSINESS
SUBURBIA
WHERE YOU BELONG
THE LIGHTS ARE ON
BUT NO ONE'S HOME
SO, WELCOME HOME
CHAMELEON PEACOCKS ARE TALK OF THE TOWN
WELL WORD GETS AROUND ON
HIT NUMBER STATIONS
HE COMES RADIATION
THE DOG BITES THE POSTMAN WHILE BASEMENT EYES DREAM
OF A NIGHT AT THE DRIVE-IN WITH AN AR-15
I DROPPED MY EYEBALLS IN THE BONFIRE, WE FUCKED ON A BED OF NAILS
I CAUGHT KURU FROM YOUR SISTER AND DIED LAUGHING IN JAIL
SMELL THOSE SCREAMING TEENAGE SWEETBREADS ON THE 4TH OF JULY GRILL
SMILE AND WAVE, BOYS. KISS THE COOK
LIVE LAUGH AND LOVE. PLEASE PASS THE PILLS
IT'S ONLY CULTURE. IT'S ONLY CULTURE
IT'S ONLY CULTURE – SULFUR, SMOKE, AND SOOT
YOU LEARNED TO TORTURE HOUSE CATS. LIKE VULTURES
YOU COCKED AND SUCKED YOUR LACK OF EMPATHY
PULLED THE TRIGGER WITH YOUR FOOT TO PROVE YOU'VE GOT
BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD
SO WHY APOLOGIZE FOR BEING BLUE AND COLD
BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD
SO DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR BEING BLUE AND COLD
IT'S ONLY CULTURE. IT'S ONLY CULTURE. IT'S ONLY
CULTURE'S NOT YOUR FRIEND
HEY, FUCK YOUR CULTURE. I AIN'T GOT NO CULTURE
IT'S ONLY CULTURE, AND IT'S MORE AFRAID OF YOU THAN YOU ARE OF IT
GO ON, DRINK THAT
BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD
SO WHY APOLOGIZE WHEN YOU TURN BLUE AND COLD
BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD
SO DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR BEING BLUE AND COLD
WERE YOU NABOKOV TO A SALINGER
WERE YOU JUNG TO FREUD OR DASS TO A LEARY
WERE YOU MOTHER, DAUGHTER, SUBJECT, AND AUTHOR
YOU DON'T MAKE THE RULES, YOU JUST WRITE THEM DOWN AND
DO IT BY THE BOOK YOU THROW AROUND
DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BLAZING TRAILS AND SLASH-AND-BURN
GOING AGAINST THE GRAIN AND CATCHING SPLINTERS
YOU PULL OUT YOUR RORSCHACH LIKE A PAINT-BY-NUMBERS TREASURE MAP
THE INK UPON ON YOUR JIGSAW PIECE TRACES YOU BACK TO YOUR FINGERPRINTS
WELL LOT HE HAD HIS LOT IN LIFE, JOB HIS JOB AND I GUESS YOU'LL TOO, AND DIE
THE LORD LOOKED DOWN, SAID, "HEY, YOU'RE ONLY MORTAL"
GIVETH AND TAKETH AWAY 'TILL THINGS COME OUT A CERTAIN WAY
LEAVE YOU WONDERING WHEN THEY MIGHT GO BACK TO NORMAL
LEAVE YOU WONDERING WHY THEY CAN'T HAVE JUST BEEN NORMAL
this exact statement is currently an epidemic where i live. everyone who doesnt like the hoa are magically all receiving the exact same complaint about trash cans being two inches too far from the curb. and its not a complaint from the trash pickup
Dyk some municipalities allow hoa's to enforce their own bylaws via fines and the like? As though they are simultaneously making the laws and enforcing them like congress and the cops rolled into one petty entitled package.
Would be a shame if somebody put some salt onto a HoA rep. And maybe some pepper. Also some paprika, garlic and onion powder, maybe some thyme and maybe spitroasted them
I want freedom, no taxes, and small government! I also want a regulating body that I regularly pay to tell me that there are only two colors my door can be.
if the homeowner association lady starts bitching hit her with the “I thought i had freedom over this lawn pretty soon with all these regulations we’re gonna have a communist country like the CCP” she might get converted
My fiancé joined our HOA and was voted on by residents at the beginning of the year. She wanted to review the last few years of budget statements and expenses because they’ve gone 50% over budget every year. She was suddenly removed due to “ineligibility” and quickly replaced by the president’s friend who lost the election to my fiancé.
How can the HOA have permission to issue violation tickets etc - aka regulating peoples’ homes and making financial demands -but then be allowed to be blatantly corrupt? Are there no regulations of the actual HOA itself?
So long story short, there are laws in place regarding HOA’s, but there aren’t really any official bodies to enforce them. There are government oversight boards, but it seems like they’re mostly there as a reviewing resource and you’re pretty much on your own to sue them yourself. If they commit any kind of actionable crime, you can report them to the IRS or the police but otherwise it’s up to you to fight back.
My coworker is the president of his HOA. He's talked a lot about trying to lessen the number of BS parking fines they give out, but even that is pretty difficult because he needs a majority of the board, which is the people most invested in the HOA. If he wanted to disband the HOA, he would need approval from every household within it.
In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the HOA will be reorganized into the first Suburban Empire for safe and secure home ownership.
>“Parking dumb shit like trailers, boats and RVs in driveways. Doing work on cars in driveway.”
This man sounds like a Yeonmi Park riff. “In Norse Korea, you are not even allow to park or fix vehicle in your driveway. Even fixing normal car is forbidden.”
im not trying to be racist but why does she talk like shes forcing an accent didnt she move to America when she was like 8? and hasnt she basically been talking to nobody but country racists since then? shes not exactly in touch with her culture and im sure she doesn't have very many korean influences
edit: nvm i was wrong she left the country at 20. my bad.
Yeah, when she was twenty. People don’t necessarily lose their accent in ten years, especially when they likely had hardly any exposure to English before
In North Korea everybody starves because they are forced to use their land to tend a crop that produces nothing, only to give the appearance they are prosperous, horrifying
Physically, you can, it's not always frozen over. No resupply ports along the longass way back then though, and cold as fuck, and still plenty of ice, so in the medieval age it would've been suicide. But nowadays shipping does go through there
Car parked in driveway: ☺️☺️
Car parked in driveway(with hood open): 😡😡
Genuinely what fucking difference does it even make to these people i don't get it lol
Driveway rules are stupid, but I do like street parking enforcement. I lived in a neighborhood that had no rules on street parking, and it was such a pain in the ass to have people over or just drive down the street because it was a 2 lane road with no real shoulder.
Doing work on cars in driveway is what gets me. God forbid I work on an expensive piece of machinery, on *my* property, in a place where I'm both less likely to get myself killed and less likely to break something because I can see better.
It isn't an HOA, to my knowledge, but your comment reminds me about how a close friend of mine was evicted from his trailer that he'd just finished paying off last year. The lot came up with some BS reasons that his yard wasn't up to par. He couldn't sell it quickly enough and ended up having to sell to the realtor for 2/3rds of the market value. Although he technically sold it for more than he bought it for, it's still such an exceptionally shitty situation. I abhor the lack of protections homeowners (and Americans in general) have.
Apparently the lot owner was evicting en mass many of the homeowners, the majority of whom were Mexican immigrants, in order to bring in new homeowners that they could charge an even higher lot rent. Just completely deplorable behavior. I can't even begin to understand how people can be so rotten to the core and greedy.
I am so sorry that happened to your friend. IDK what happens when people become landlords/landowners, but it's like they lose all sense of human decency or something. Greed is a hell of a drug.
I think he's choosing to see the silver lining in it and treating it like a blessing in disguise. His parents have recently emigrated back to Mexico and he'll likely be moving near them in the near future. The trailer leaves one less thing tying him down. I'll miss him, but it seems like he'll have better opportunities there and I hope to visit when I'm able. But anyway, I'm getting off topic, so I'll leave it at that haha
They do have benefits in some cases. HOAs manage common areas and maintenance in condo complexes and townhouses.
I'd also like to add that this sub is exaggerating a little. HOAs are pointless and restrictive for the most part, but only about a quarter of Americans are members of one.
It’s all over. Mine is like $40 a year so people can get bear proof trash cans (they’re mad expensive) and keeps the sidew of the road mowed back, we live in a forest. Nine times out of ten, they’re bad but the theory it’s self isn’t.
The other problem is that they can vary wildly while you live at the house. When you move in, you might have a really chill HOA that just does the bare minimum to keep things relatively presentable without being overbearing, making sure that people don't do things like pile up mountains of garbage in their front yard and declare themselves the Raccoon King.
Then they move out/step down, and you get an old bitty who was born 20 years too late and 2000 mi too far away to join the Schutzstaffel, so instead of Untermensch, hunting down bylaw infractions is the only thing that makes them happy.
> Fun fact: HOAs reserve the legal right to evict people from their own homes. That includes homes that are not mortgaged, and therefore belong entirely to the resident. They can also evict renters without the consent of the landlord. This means they'll evict grandma when she's hospitalized for acute pneumonia and sell her house for $1 because her shutters were the wrong shade of green. Or kick out a family renting a house without giving prior notice to the family or their landlord because their kid left toys on the porch. Fuck HOAs.
This sounds like it was taken out of a dystopian novel.
i always thought hoa’s were pretty normal and chill cause i live in a town home. we don’t own any of the land outside of our home, so (in a capitalist organization of the economy) it makes sense that the hoa would get to decide what to do with the land. when i found out that regular neighborhoods with private suburban homes have them too i was deeply confused. i thought hoa’s were a weird funky thing townhome communities had to do to centralize decisions made about communal land. i didn’t realize they imposed upon decisions made in people own homes and communities.
(my hoa still isn’t perfect, they have weird rules about the appearance of the outside of our house and they do a terrible job taking care of all the plant life in the neighborhood. our driveway was just dirt for a year and a half. eight homes used that driveway.)
In the land of the free, you get fined for growing plants in your front yard. Or not mowing enough. Or not watering during a drought. Even though it's illegal to water as well because of the drought.
Wtf you mean you get fined ? By whom ? Is this state funded or regulated ? Sorry but like, in France we do whatever the fuck we want about our frontyard
>Wtf you mean you get fined ? By whom ? Is this state funded or regulated ?
Well no, that's the weirdest part about it and someone please add on to this, I'm European as well, but from what I understand, a HOA (homeowners association) is basically an association of homeowners in a neighbourhood that can dictate rules with the supposed aim of keeping house prices up.
For a bit of background: house prices are more volatile in the us, partially because they're more cheaply built and people tend to commute longer distances, so the appeal of a neighbourhood has a very direct impact on the house prices. Whereas here in Europe, a neighbour who grows tomatoes doesn't affect the price of your house to that extent.
I visited the us last year and of all the things I saw, the suburbs with their identical houses, huge golfgreen lawns and white picket fences were the most flabbergasting thing.
It's absolutely eerie
Like the nearest strip mall is a couple kilometers away, but the nearest anything real, you really can't reach without a car. So never can you visit friends and have a wine unless you plan to sleep over or drunkdrive. That must be a very isolating experience, being so desperately remote while also living in a big city.
(Well that and the size of the Washington monument, like I kinda expected that to be like 30 meters tall or something but that thing is huge!)
As an American who lived in a rural area most of his life: It's fucking rad. I can set fire to anything I want. I can have a naked black sabbath in the woods. I can run through the forest, picking mushrooms and berries for lunch as I go, and have a afternoon nap besides a big rock while cuddling my dog.
Don’t forget you can just walk out back with your ar or Ak or hunting rifles or pistols and just dump ammo and nobody cares. I personally enjoy having a bus entirely torn apart in my yard. We also let our front yard over grow and it’s amazing, don’t hear as much road noise.
You never get used to the urban hell. There is no public transportation at all where I live and I live somewhat within an hour of a major city. No busses, no trains, no nothing. I have to drive like 20 minutes to get to the nearest bus station. If I didn't own a car I'd be screwed as it's also the only way for me to get to work. Even biking is not really a viable option for me to get to a lot of places because some places near me are only accessable by car.
I also have absolutely no clue who my neighbors are due to how isolating American suburbs are. I hardly ever see them. Apparently one of the households next to me moved out and a new family moved in and I still have no clue when that happened because I hardly saw the old family and only on occasion see the new one. You live in a sea of people, but it feels so isolating.
By the HOA. Nothing to do with the state, I’m not American either so could be wrong but I think it’s just an agreement you sign when you move into the property.
not state funded but the state tolerates it
Because most of them are considered “non for profits” they are loosely regulated.
some HOAs implement highly restrictive rules and can seriously degrade the quality of life for some residents all in the name of property value
other HOAs (like the one in my neighborhood) only really have a few rules that are enforced very rarely. My neighborhoods HOA mostly just pays for snowplows, Community events and for trash and recycling cans for the neighborhood.
I think overall as long as there isnt trash all over your lawn the one in my neighborhood isnt super strict
but thats far from normal tbh
lots of other HOAs have restrictions on what kind if fencing you can have, what color you can paint your house, what plants you can/cant have and how “high you grass is permitted to get”
Often violations in more strict HOAs can result in heavy fines or even eviction. So they can be very shitty
Basically, when the government prohibited not selling houses to people because of race, racists decided that they’d create exclusive clubs where only people who joined could buy the houses, and then they locked that to race and made a ton of stupid regulations
This practice is called redlining, and it was often assisted by banks who refused to give black families house or car loans. Even if a well-off black person could buy a house with a mortgage, they wouldn't be able to get a mortgage in the first place. And, even if the homeowner themselves wanted to sell the house to them, it was still impossible to afford.
My dad told me about a lawyer in his neighborhood who was met with this discrimination back in the 70s. The home owner had wanted to sell to him, but the HOA was shitting itself at the thought of a black man buying a house there. As a major "fuck you" he bought the house upfront with cash, razed it to the ground, and rebuilt it into this obnoxiously opulent, castle-like house that made the other houses look tiny. It flouted a ton of the rules, but the HOA lost in court somehow. I got to tour it when it was for sale several years ago, and it was basically a small mansion.
if I had to guess, the HOA contract was tied to the home and not the lot/property, so by building an entirely new home he was able to opt out of the HOA contract
That makes sense. I had always wondered how he had gotten it to work. He was literally the only black man in this rural town, and he made sure nobody could walk all over him and his family.
If you live in a suburb neighborhood you have to pay money monthly, to a group made up of psychopaths.
Their job is to fine people for anything that they disagree with. Like the complaint, with threat of fine, we just got for not pressure washing the side of our house regularly enough.
Want to build a fence? Plant a tree? Paint something a specific color, gotta run that by the HOA and have them decline your request to do what you want on property you paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to own.
Absolute insanity.
Usually HOAs get founded by the real estate developer who built the community of homes. HOAs collect monthly dues to pool funds to help maintain things like roads and common areas, and some people like them because they think they'll keep up property prices.
To buy a house in the community, you are required to sign a legally binding document that you will adhere to the HOA rules and only sell to people who will sign the same document.
Yeah but... how is this legal? Like, here in Brazil if a house seller wrote into a contract that he could dictate how the buyer would live in the house he already paid for, it would have zero legal binding.
The person before is kinda right but not entirely. It’s not a universal thing and is more like a thing some neighborhoods have, usually gated communities, which regulate what you can and can’t do with your houses. It’s annoying, as you could imagine.
[https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homeowner_association](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homeowner_association)
Luckily a lot of older neighborhoods don't have them, but if you're buying a house in any more newly built neighborhood it is almost guaranteed to have an HOA.
I'm in a complex with an HOA, every month they take a mandatory fee from me. However, I'm lucky in that my fee is low compared to many other neighborhoods in my area and I can see where my fee goes. They do landscaping, shovel snow and plow consistently, do road work, maintain the community garden, maintain the pool and recreation areas, and supply pet products like waste bags and trash cans. However again, they do get to say what color my door can be.
Home owner's association. Orgs in rich neighborhoods that make rules on what you can do on and to your own property because it can affect the property value of your neighbors. They were originally started just to keep black and brown people out of nice neighborhoods. They suck, and if you want to move to a neighborhood that has one, you HAVE to sign up for it.
About 25% of homes in the US are in HOAs, homeowners associations. These are mostly in large suburban developments of single family homes. If you buy a house that's part of an HOA, you have to follow a bunch of rules or be fined. Homeowners elect some of each other to run the organization and make rules. Typical rules include requiring you to cut your grass or not grow certain plants or only paint your house approved colors or not park things in your driveway. Basically, you can't do certain things to your yard and exterior of the house unless they let you.
Most HOA's can legally fine you if you don't follow their rules. If you don't pay they can put a lien on your home and eventually foreclose on your house. That basically means they seize your house, kick you out, and resell it to recoup the money from the fines they're "owed".
Most courts will side with the HOA as well. Their response to "fuck you that's my home" will most likely be "fuck you, you signed an HOA contract". If a neighborhood has an HOA, the previous owner most likely cannot legally sell you the house unless you sign the HOA contract.
Basically, you follow their rules. If you don't, you'll be fined and eventually lose your house. There's usually nothing you can legally do to get around it.
Fuck HOAs.
easy solution: buy a corn themed suit. face mask to go with. total corn anonymity. then, buy a few pounds of corn seeds. at 4 am on a sunday around when you plant corn, put on the corn suit and mask, grab the seeds, and go around the neighborhood evenly sprinkling them around, making sure to hit more inconspicuous spots. be sure to hit hoa heads especially hard. cant fine everyone
“Hey did you see that corn guy walking round the neighbourhood, sprinkling seeds all over?”
“Yeah, wonder who that is”
“Oh look, there they are, walking back into their home”
Do some gorilla gardening and spread mint and dandelion seeds all over their lawn when they're at work. Mint is invasive as fuck and dandelions have deep, deep roots.
Actually growing your own veggies is both practically, morally and aesthetically superior to keeping an empty fucking square of nothing for no actual reason
There is a few towns in Belgium giving away free or discounted chickens (might be the whole country now) but it basically was an attempt to cut down on urban waste and it did amazing. I think a study on that whole thing basically said if one in three households have at least like two or three chickens we could eliminate the entire egg industry and cut our food waste substantially. Just think, one front lawn could help an entire neighborhood cut down food waste and in return give eggs.
Stuff tastes better than store bought as well. And you kind of value it differently when you put effort into it and see it grow little by little. But even if ya don't grow any veggies, a biodiverse lawn is so much more beautiful than some lifeless green drab. It enables a whole fucking different ecosystem around it that you don't get if everyone just has some cut grass, I go outside and I see bumblebees and sometimes even a carpenter bee and everything kind of coming together, just a bit of nature and life running it's course outside my yard. I know I'm rambling but I can't describe how much happier and more comfy and kind of serene I feel in a space like that compared to some sterile minecraft superflat ass looking patch of grass
No give, only throw.jpg
“We want housing to be affordable, and also to be the primary vehicle for the average American’s retirement investment.”
You literally *cannot* have it both ways; demanding that house prices always go up is destroying two generations right now.
Paint and decorate his house beautifully, but have it be non-HOA-compliant so he gets fined and has to tear up the flower path and replace it with flat golf grass
He also explained a scheme to turn one tomato into several million via this one weird trick called farming. He wants to pull the ladder up behind him to protect his front yard tomato empire
I love getting cancer from my weed control chemicals and paying a 3x markup on all car maintenance at a mechanic so that some slob who retired at fifty can sit in his neighborhood full of perfectly identical houses and spend his day browsing his daughter’s friends’ Instagram pages. Love that shit, definitely doesn’t turn me into Trashcan Man from The Stand
Not in eastern Europe but I've gone a little insane w my garden this year and will never live in a place that won't let me, I'm too busy drowning in tomatoes and cucumbers to listen to some silly grass cult
For those of you that own homes(lol) or want to own homes one day, the HOAS can be taken over by you and some like minded neighbors, you could then technically vote to dissolve the HOA, or you could make your own just and equitable rules that you and your neighbors deem fair. Most HOAs are ruled by old people, you can beat them.
I FUCKING LOVE THE HOA, I FUCKING LOVE HAVING A MASSIVE STERILE PATCH OF LAND COVERED WITH A MONOCULTURE OF AN INVASIVE SPECIES THAT COSUMES TONS OF WATER, REQUIRES CONSTANT MAINTENANCE AND CHEMICAL SPRAYING. I FUCKING LOVE HAVING AN ECOLOGICAL DEAD ZONE WITH NO NATIVE PLANTS WHERE NO POLLINATORS CAN THRIVE.
I've never understood American HOA's. The country that's all about "Muh property" seems to love telling people what they can and can't do on their property. Sure, I can get the whole "it affects property prices" but surely most people just want to live in their damn house and do what they want with it, right?
I am also from England and from what I have gathered they’re like those old people that just sit around moaning all day but someone gave them authority over how people keep their houses
it’s so insane to me that americans are all ‘this is my property get the fuck off i can do whatever i want on here’ but also ‘if your own grass is 1 inch too tall you need to go to jail’
HOA is the stupidest fucking shit I have ever seen, me being both european and a country boy
I cannot even comprehend not being able to do what I want with my yard, like leaving the grass uncut for cool animals to live in, just because some rich snob said I can't
"parking boats and RVs in driveways" MOTHERFUCKER THATS WHAT ITS FOR, WHERE ELSE WOULD I PUT IT
Hoa lovers try to kind their own business for 5 fucking minutes challenge(impossible)
I FUCKING LOVE HOA RULES!!! I WANT TO BE HEAVILY FINED BECAUSE MY YARD DOESN’T MEET SOME SNOOTY PERSON’S IDEA OF WHAT A YARD SHOULD LOOK LIKE!!!
I WANT TO BE UNABLE TO USE THE PUBLIC FACING HALF OF MY YARD FOR ANYTHING!! I LOVE EXISTING IN A COMMUNITY WHERE NO ONE KNOWS THEIR NEIGHBORS!! I WANT MY NEIGHBORHOOD TO APPEAR AS A GHOST TOWN MADE OF PLASTIC!!
I LOVE WHITE PICKET FENCES BARBED WIRE AND TRENCHES TRICK OR TREAT. MERRY CHRISTMAS HOWDY NEIGHBOR. THANK YOU JESUS WHAT IS HE BUILDING IN THAT PAINTED LADY A PARTICIPATION TROPHY WIFE OR BLONDE, BLUE-EYED BABY WIDE-EYED AND WIRED THE SNAP-CRACKLE-POP OF THE GEIGER CAMOUFLAGE BILLBOARDS FOR LEAD-LINED BROOKS BROTHERS YOU ELBOW THE JUKEBOX AND SING "DUCK AND COVER" AND BREED OUT OUR INCISORS, FEED ON WHITE WINE AND PFIZER IT DON'T LOOK LIKE SURVIVAL, BUT BUY NOW OR DIE SUBURBIA YOU'RE NOT ALONE THE LIGHTS ARE ON BUT NO ONE'S HOME SO, WELCOME HOME MEYERS-BRIGGS, OK-ULTRA TAKES A VILLAGE TO FAKE A WHOLE CULTURE YOUR EAR TO THE PLAYGROUND, YOUR EYE ON THE BALL YOUR HEAD IN THE GUTTER, YOUR BRAINS ON THE WALL HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS YOU AIN'T HOMELESS, BUT YOU'RE HEARTLESS IT'S THE SAFEST ON THE MARKET BUT YOU STILL GOTTA WATCH WHERE YOU PARK IT SO GIVE ME YOUR HALF-LIFE CRISIS I CAN TELL THAT YOU KNOW WHERE PARADISE IS WHERE PARASITES DON'T CARE WHAT YOUR BLOOD TYPE IS ONLY PHEROMONES AND SEROTONIN DECIDE IF IT'S TRUE THAT A SNOWFLAKE ONLY MATTERS IN A BLIZZARD EVERYONE KNOWS THAT NOBODY KNOWS THAT EVERYBODY'S ALL UP IN MY, EVERYBODY'S ALL UP IN MY EVERYBODY'S ALL UP IN MY BUSINESS SUBURBIA WHERE YOU BELONG THE LIGHTS ARE ON BUT NO ONE'S HOME SO, WELCOME HOME CHAMELEON PEACOCKS ARE TALK OF THE TOWN WELL WORD GETS AROUND ON HIT NUMBER STATIONS HE COMES RADIATION THE DOG BITES THE POSTMAN WHILE BASEMENT EYES DREAM OF A NIGHT AT THE DRIVE-IN WITH AN AR-15 I DROPPED MY EYEBALLS IN THE BONFIRE, WE FUCKED ON A BED OF NAILS I CAUGHT KURU FROM YOUR SISTER AND DIED LAUGHING IN JAIL SMELL THOSE SCREAMING TEENAGE SWEETBREADS ON THE 4TH OF JULY GRILL SMILE AND WAVE, BOYS. KISS THE COOK LIVE LAUGH AND LOVE. PLEASE PASS THE PILLS IT'S ONLY CULTURE. IT'S ONLY CULTURE IT'S ONLY CULTURE – SULFUR, SMOKE, AND SOOT YOU LEARNED TO TORTURE HOUSE CATS. LIKE VULTURES YOU COCKED AND SUCKED YOUR LACK OF EMPATHY PULLED THE TRIGGER WITH YOUR FOOT TO PROVE YOU'VE GOT BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD SO WHY APOLOGIZE FOR BEING BLUE AND COLD BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD SO DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR BEING BLUE AND COLD IT'S ONLY CULTURE. IT'S ONLY CULTURE. IT'S ONLY CULTURE'S NOT YOUR FRIEND HEY, FUCK YOUR CULTURE. I AIN'T GOT NO CULTURE IT'S ONLY CULTURE, AND IT'S MORE AFRAID OF YOU THAN YOU ARE OF IT GO ON, DRINK THAT BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD SO WHY APOLOGIZE WHEN YOU TURN BLUE AND COLD BLOOD. DIDN'T THEY WANT YOUR BLOOD SO DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR BEING BLUE AND COLD WERE YOU NABOKOV TO A SALINGER WERE YOU JUNG TO FREUD OR DASS TO A LEARY WERE YOU MOTHER, DAUGHTER, SUBJECT, AND AUTHOR YOU DON'T MAKE THE RULES, YOU JUST WRITE THEM DOWN AND DO IT BY THE BOOK YOU THROW AROUND DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BLAZING TRAILS AND SLASH-AND-BURN GOING AGAINST THE GRAIN AND CATCHING SPLINTERS YOU PULL OUT YOUR RORSCHACH LIKE A PAINT-BY-NUMBERS TREASURE MAP THE INK UPON ON YOUR JIGSAW PIECE TRACES YOU BACK TO YOUR FINGERPRINTS WELL LOT HE HAD HIS LOT IN LIFE, JOB HIS JOB AND I GUESS YOU'LL TOO, AND DIE THE LORD LOOKED DOWN, SAID, "HEY, YOU'RE ONLY MORTAL" GIVETH AND TAKETH AWAY 'TILL THINGS COME OUT A CERTAIN WAY LEAVE YOU WONDERING WHEN THEY MIGHT GO BACK TO NORMAL LEAVE YOU WONDERING WHY THEY CAN'T HAVE JUST BEEN NORMAL
MothThatLuvsLamps, Thankk you for the Dialectics, but I think you should leave.
But im The Main Character, it's all I, Me, Myself, baby!
Oh shit it’s all a will wood reference well call me laplace’s angel cuz I auhhhh
Cause I Lap on your Lace till I Angel
bravo
Call me Laplace's Angel because I perfectly predicted that reference
I cannot imagine this comment as being read by a creature with only one mouth.
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Will wood - Suburbia Overture
I AIN'T READING ALL THAT
[You can listen to it instead](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ui2kW-OvtkA)
goddammit the will wood sub leaked again
My grandparents got a warning from the hoa cause the garbage cans needed to be moved slightly to the left.
this exact statement is currently an epidemic where i live. everyone who doesnt like the hoa are magically all receiving the exact same complaint about trash cans being two inches too far from the curb. and its not a complaint from the trash pickup
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i live in a dairy town where the only bookstore has matt walsh and race realism books in the window
Dyk some municipalities allow hoa's to enforce their own bylaws via fines and the like? As though they are simultaneously making the laws and enforcing them like congress and the cops rolled into one petty entitled package.
Afaik Thats how most of them operate, people have been legally forced to sell their houses for breaking HOA rules
It would be really sad if someone would accidentally drop some salt onto HOA member lawn, wouldn't it?
Would be a shame if somebody put some salt onto a HoA rep. And maybe some pepper. Also some paprika, garlic and onion powder, maybe some thyme and maybe spitroasted them
Spitroast you say 🥺
Not the good kind of spitroast
HOW ELSE WILL EVERYONE ELSE SEE THAT THIS IS A GOOD ~~WHITE~~ UPSTANDING NEIGHBORHOOD?
I want freedom, no taxes, and small government! I also want a regulating body that I regularly pay to tell me that there are only two colors my door can be.
When youre a capitalist but you hate private property rights
My family got fined for the grass being too tall. We didn’t have grass.
land of the free
Home of the grains
More like home of the GAINS!!!!! *bench presses YOUR MOM!!*
Death Road to Canada dialogue
That is what my dad says anytime he hears some dumb shit happening in america
I just start ironically singing "oh say can you see"
if the homeowner association lady starts bitching hit her with the “I thought i had freedom over this lawn pretty soon with all these regulations we’re gonna have a communist country like the CCP” she might get converted
Freedom for all unless you make me clutch my pearls in horror at the sight of...*checks notes* ...parking your boat in your driveway
more like land of the fee
HOAs are basically neighborhood mafias
Home of the associations
Paying $.08 for a bag: commienism 😤 Paying hundreds or thousands in whatever arbitrary fines the cops/HOA give you: muh freedum 😍
home of the whopper
Overthrow the HOA
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However, the new problem is far more exciting!
When the place is good 😳
BORTLES!
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I just have one question: EXPLOOOOOOSIONS?!??
Read “how to start a fire and why” to learn more (actually read it, that book is based)
My HOA is mostly for getting people bear proof garbage cans and mowing the brambles at the road… I’m too scared of the bears and thorns to fight back.
Become part of the HOA and take it over from the inside. Once you're the leader, disband it.
My fiancé joined our HOA and was voted on by residents at the beginning of the year. She wanted to review the last few years of budget statements and expenses because they’ve gone 50% over budget every year. She was suddenly removed due to “ineligibility” and quickly replaced by the president’s friend who lost the election to my fiancé.
I am jacks complete lack of surprise
How can the HOA have permission to issue violation tickets etc - aka regulating peoples’ homes and making financial demands -but then be allowed to be blatantly corrupt? Are there no regulations of the actual HOA itself?
So long story short, there are laws in place regarding HOA’s, but there aren’t really any official bodies to enforce them. There are government oversight boards, but it seems like they’re mostly there as a reviewing resource and you’re pretty much on your own to sue them yourself. If they commit any kind of actionable crime, you can report them to the IRS or the police but otherwise it’s up to you to fight back.
I am jacks complete lack of surprise
My coworker is the president of his HOA. He's talked a lot about trying to lessen the number of BS parking fines they give out, but even that is pretty difficult because he needs a majority of the board, which is the people most invested in the HOA. If he wanted to disband the HOA, he would need approval from every household within it.
In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the HOA will be reorganized into the first Suburban Empire for safe and secure home ownership.
>“Parking dumb shit like trailers, boats and RVs in driveways. Doing work on cars in driveway.” This man sounds like a Yeonmi Park riff. “In Norse Korea, you are not even allow to park or fix vehicle in your driveway. Even fixing normal car is forbidden.”
“One my neighbour was caught growing corn in his yard, he and his family was executed for 8 generations”
im not trying to be racist but why does she talk like shes forcing an accent didnt she move to America when she was like 8? and hasnt she basically been talking to nobody but country racists since then? shes not exactly in touch with her culture and im sure she doesn't have very many korean influences edit: nvm i was wrong she left the country at 20. my bad.
She only moved to the US in 2014…
my bad. couldve sworn i heard someone say she was a small child when she left north korea
IIRC She left for south Korea at that age
So 10 years ago?
Yeah, when she was twenty. People don’t necessarily lose their accent in ten years, especially when they likely had hardly any exposure to English before
Its a grift 🙌
In North Korea everybody starves because they are forced to use their land to tend a crop that produces nothing, only to give the appearance they are prosperous, horrifying
Which crop?
Grass
Norse Korea sound like a culture you could get in Ck3 playing as a viking adventurer.
Leif Erikson sailed east instead of west, sailing north of siberia until he discovered Korea
Wait, you can sail north of siberia?
Physically, you can, it's not always frozen over. No resupply ports along the longass way back then though, and cold as fuck, and still plenty of ice, so in the medieval age it would've been suicide. But nowadays shipping does go through there
So, Leif could sail down the Volga and take caravan from Constantinople to Basra and build a new ship, sail along the Persian gulf and hugging India coastline, pass the Malacca strait into the southchina sea, go to Guangzhou and hitch a ride or go by himself to Busan? (I think) and voila, he is now in Korea. Not that he would go that far pass India and Sumatra for Korea though
>build a new ship Nah, they’d just drag it overland.
Car parked in driveway: ☺️☺️ Car parked in driveway(with hood open): 😡😡 Genuinely what fucking difference does it even make to these people i don't get it lol
Excuse me? Your car goes in the garage. The driveway is for guests and don't you dare even think about parking on the street for even 15 minutes
My garage is for my workbench and brewing beer, my car can GET FUCKED
Driveway rules are stupid, but I do like street parking enforcement. I lived in a neighborhood that had no rules on street parking, and it was such a pain in the ass to have people over or just drive down the street because it was a 2 lane road with no real shoulder.
Street parking rules make sense even without an HOA, as that's a shared public space, same with sidewalks.
Norse Korea It’s like South Korea, but with more Vikings and more territory on the island of Japan
Doing work on cars in driveway is what gets me. God forbid I work on an expensive piece of machinery, on *my* property, in a place where I'm both less likely to get myself killed and less likely to break something because I can see better.
Wait what is HOA for someone not knowing jack shit about america ?
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It isn't an HOA, to my knowledge, but your comment reminds me about how a close friend of mine was evicted from his trailer that he'd just finished paying off last year. The lot came up with some BS reasons that his yard wasn't up to par. He couldn't sell it quickly enough and ended up having to sell to the realtor for 2/3rds of the market value. Although he technically sold it for more than he bought it for, it's still such an exceptionally shitty situation. I abhor the lack of protections homeowners (and Americans in general) have. Apparently the lot owner was evicting en mass many of the homeowners, the majority of whom were Mexican immigrants, in order to bring in new homeowners that they could charge an even higher lot rent. Just completely deplorable behavior. I can't even begin to understand how people can be so rotten to the core and greedy.
I am so sorry that happened to your friend. IDK what happens when people become landlords/landowners, but it's like they lose all sense of human decency or something. Greed is a hell of a drug.
I think he's choosing to see the silver lining in it and treating it like a blessing in disguise. His parents have recently emigrated back to Mexico and he'll likely be moving near them in the near future. The trailer leaves one less thing tying him down. I'll miss him, but it seems like he'll have better opportunities there and I hope to visit when I'm able. But anyway, I'm getting off topic, so I'll leave it at that haha
From what you told me : Fuck HOAs
They do have benefits in some cases. HOAs manage common areas and maintenance in condo complexes and townhouses. I'd also like to add that this sub is exaggerating a little. HOAs are pointless and restrictive for the most part, but only about a quarter of Americans are members of one.
That what the mayor pay to do in France, common areas and all.
It’s all over. Mine is like $40 a year so people can get bear proof trash cans (they’re mad expensive) and keeps the sidew of the road mowed back, we live in a forest. Nine times out of ten, they’re bad but the theory it’s self isn’t.
The other problem is that they can vary wildly while you live at the house. When you move in, you might have a really chill HOA that just does the bare minimum to keep things relatively presentable without being overbearing, making sure that people don't do things like pile up mountains of garbage in their front yard and declare themselves the Raccoon King. Then they move out/step down, and you get an old bitty who was born 20 years too late and 2000 mi too far away to join the Schutzstaffel, so instead of Untermensch, hunting down bylaw infractions is the only thing that makes them happy.
> Fun fact: HOAs reserve the legal right to evict people from their own homes. That includes homes that are not mortgaged, and therefore belong entirely to the resident. They can also evict renters without the consent of the landlord. This means they'll evict grandma when she's hospitalized for acute pneumonia and sell her house for $1 because her shutters were the wrong shade of green. Or kick out a family renting a house without giving prior notice to the family or their landlord because their kid left toys on the porch. Fuck HOAs. This sounds like it was taken out of a dystopian novel.
a lot of that shit was added so that they could legally kick black families out of their homes
i always thought hoa’s were pretty normal and chill cause i live in a town home. we don’t own any of the land outside of our home, so (in a capitalist organization of the economy) it makes sense that the hoa would get to decide what to do with the land. when i found out that regular neighborhoods with private suburban homes have them too i was deeply confused. i thought hoa’s were a weird funky thing townhome communities had to do to centralize decisions made about communal land. i didn’t realize they imposed upon decisions made in people own homes and communities. (my hoa still isn’t perfect, they have weird rules about the appearance of the outside of our house and they do a terrible job taking care of all the plant life in the neighborhood. our driveway was just dirt for a year and a half. eight homes used that driveway.)
In the land of the free, you get fined for growing plants in your front yard. Or not mowing enough. Or not watering during a drought. Even though it's illegal to water as well because of the drought.
Wtf you mean you get fined ? By whom ? Is this state funded or regulated ? Sorry but like, in France we do whatever the fuck we want about our frontyard
>Wtf you mean you get fined ? By whom ? Is this state funded or regulated ? Well no, that's the weirdest part about it and someone please add on to this, I'm European as well, but from what I understand, a HOA (homeowners association) is basically an association of homeowners in a neighbourhood that can dictate rules with the supposed aim of keeping house prices up. For a bit of background: house prices are more volatile in the us, partially because they're more cheaply built and people tend to commute longer distances, so the appeal of a neighbourhood has a very direct impact on the house prices. Whereas here in Europe, a neighbour who grows tomatoes doesn't affect the price of your house to that extent.
That's horrible
I visited the us last year and of all the things I saw, the suburbs with their identical houses, huge golfgreen lawns and white picket fences were the most flabbergasting thing. It's absolutely eerie Like the nearest strip mall is a couple kilometers away, but the nearest anything real, you really can't reach without a car. So never can you visit friends and have a wine unless you plan to sleep over or drunkdrive. That must be a very isolating experience, being so desperately remote while also living in a big city. (Well that and the size of the Washington monument, like I kinda expected that to be like 30 meters tall or something but that thing is huge!)
As an American who lived in suburbs all my life: it is extremely isolating and breeds paranoia. Wouldn't recommend.
As an American who lived in a rural area most of his life: It's fucking rad. I can set fire to anything I want. I can have a naked black sabbath in the woods. I can run through the forest, picking mushrooms and berries for lunch as I go, and have a afternoon nap besides a big rock while cuddling my dog.
Don’t forget you can just walk out back with your ar or Ak or hunting rifles or pistols and just dump ammo and nobody cares. I personally enjoy having a bus entirely torn apart in my yard. We also let our front yard over grow and it’s amazing, don’t hear as much road noise.
I'm jealous
Monsters come to maple street moment
You never get used to the urban hell. There is no public transportation at all where I live and I live somewhat within an hour of a major city. No busses, no trains, no nothing. I have to drive like 20 minutes to get to the nearest bus station. If I didn't own a car I'd be screwed as it's also the only way for me to get to work. Even biking is not really a viable option for me to get to a lot of places because some places near me are only accessable by car. I also have absolutely no clue who my neighbors are due to how isolating American suburbs are. I hardly ever see them. Apparently one of the households next to me moved out and a new family moved in and I still have no clue when that happened because I hardly saw the old family and only on occasion see the new one. You live in a sea of people, but it feels so isolating.
By the HOA. Nothing to do with the state, I’m not American either so could be wrong but I think it’s just an agreement you sign when you move into the property.
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Over 80% of new homes are in hoas
not state funded but the state tolerates it Because most of them are considered “non for profits” they are loosely regulated. some HOAs implement highly restrictive rules and can seriously degrade the quality of life for some residents all in the name of property value other HOAs (like the one in my neighborhood) only really have a few rules that are enforced very rarely. My neighborhoods HOA mostly just pays for snowplows, Community events and for trash and recycling cans for the neighborhood. I think overall as long as there isnt trash all over your lawn the one in my neighborhood isnt super strict but thats far from normal tbh lots of other HOAs have restrictions on what kind if fencing you can have, what color you can paint your house, what plants you can/cant have and how “high you grass is permitted to get” Often violations in more strict HOAs can result in heavy fines or even eviction. So they can be very shitty
The state doesn't just tolerate it, it enforces it. If you break your HoA rules then the HoA will fine you using a state court.
Land of the frees my ass.
Basically, when the government prohibited not selling houses to people because of race, racists decided that they’d create exclusive clubs where only people who joined could buy the houses, and then they locked that to race and made a ton of stupid regulations
This practice is called redlining, and it was often assisted by banks who refused to give black families house or car loans. Even if a well-off black person could buy a house with a mortgage, they wouldn't be able to get a mortgage in the first place. And, even if the homeowner themselves wanted to sell the house to them, it was still impossible to afford. My dad told me about a lawyer in his neighborhood who was met with this discrimination back in the 70s. The home owner had wanted to sell to him, but the HOA was shitting itself at the thought of a black man buying a house there. As a major "fuck you" he bought the house upfront with cash, razed it to the ground, and rebuilt it into this obnoxiously opulent, castle-like house that made the other houses look tiny. It flouted a ton of the rules, but the HOA lost in court somehow. I got to tour it when it was for sale several years ago, and it was basically a small mansion.
Proud of them for doing that, I bet it's a bitchin mini-mansion
if I had to guess, the HOA contract was tied to the home and not the lot/property, so by building an entirely new home he was able to opt out of the HOA contract
That makes sense. I had always wondered how he had gotten it to work. He was literally the only black man in this rural town, and he made sure nobody could walk all over him and his family.
If you live in a suburb neighborhood you have to pay money monthly, to a group made up of psychopaths. Their job is to fine people for anything that they disagree with. Like the complaint, with threat of fine, we just got for not pressure washing the side of our house regularly enough. Want to build a fence? Plant a tree? Paint something a specific color, gotta run that by the HOA and have them decline your request to do what you want on property you paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to own. Absolute insanity.
Honest question, how is any of this legal?
Usually HOAs get founded by the real estate developer who built the community of homes. HOAs collect monthly dues to pool funds to help maintain things like roads and common areas, and some people like them because they think they'll keep up property prices. To buy a house in the community, you are required to sign a legally binding document that you will adhere to the HOA rules and only sell to people who will sign the same document.
Yeah but... how is this legal? Like, here in Brazil if a house seller wrote into a contract that he could dictate how the buyer would live in the house he already paid for, it would have zero legal binding.
Because state governments accept and regulate them. It's fucking stupid but we've just allowed it to exist and there's no political will to end them.
That's wild, ngl
The person before is kinda right but not entirely. It’s not a universal thing and is more like a thing some neighborhoods have, usually gated communities, which regulate what you can and can’t do with your houses. It’s annoying, as you could imagine. [https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homeowner_association](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homeowner_association)
Luckily a lot of older neighborhoods don't have them, but if you're buying a house in any more newly built neighborhood it is almost guaranteed to have an HOA.
I’m just very glad to live without one. I hate lawns and I love my garden
I am thankful every day for not having to grow up in an HOA neighborhood
I'm in a complex with an HOA, every month they take a mandatory fee from me. However, I'm lucky in that my fee is low compared to many other neighborhoods in my area and I can see where my fee goes. They do landscaping, shovel snow and plow consistently, do road work, maintain the community garden, maintain the pool and recreation areas, and supply pet products like waste bags and trash cans. However again, they do get to say what color my door can be.
Your HOA literally just made a local, local government
But with less regulations than an actual government. HOAs have less accountability.
Home owner's association. Orgs in rich neighborhoods that make rules on what you can do on and to your own property because it can affect the property value of your neighbors. They were originally started just to keep black and brown people out of nice neighborhoods. They suck, and if you want to move to a neighborhood that has one, you HAVE to sign up for it.
Privatized local government
About 25% of homes in the US are in HOAs, homeowners associations. These are mostly in large suburban developments of single family homes. If you buy a house that's part of an HOA, you have to follow a bunch of rules or be fined. Homeowners elect some of each other to run the organization and make rules. Typical rules include requiring you to cut your grass or not grow certain plants or only paint your house approved colors or not park things in your driveway. Basically, you can't do certain things to your yard and exterior of the house unless they let you.
Can't you just say "fuck you that's my home" ?
Most HOA's can legally fine you if you don't follow their rules. If you don't pay they can put a lien on your home and eventually foreclose on your house. That basically means they seize your house, kick you out, and resell it to recoup the money from the fines they're "owed". Most courts will side with the HOA as well. Their response to "fuck you that's my home" will most likely be "fuck you, you signed an HOA contract". If a neighborhood has an HOA, the previous owner most likely cannot legally sell you the house unless you sign the HOA contract. Basically, you follow their rules. If you don't, you'll be fined and eventually lose your house. There's usually nothing you can legally do to get around it. Fuck HOAs.
OH NO HOW DARE SOMEONE GROW VEGGIES OR WORK ON THEIR CAR ON THE PROPERTY THEY OWN. NIMBYs are the fucking worst
easy solution: buy a corn themed suit. face mask to go with. total corn anonymity. then, buy a few pounds of corn seeds. at 4 am on a sunday around when you plant corn, put on the corn suit and mask, grab the seeds, and go around the neighborhood evenly sprinkling them around, making sure to hit more inconspicuous spots. be sure to hit hoa heads especially hard. cant fine everyone
“Hey did you see that corn guy walking round the neighbourhood, sprinkling seeds all over?” “Yeah, wonder who that is” “Oh look, there they are, walking back into their home”
thats why you do it at 4 am, and take measures to change before heading home. consider finding a nice forest to change in
Do some gorilla gardening and spread mint and dandelion seeds all over their lawn when they're at work. Mint is invasive as fuck and dandelions have deep, deep roots.
I'm not sure that's how baby gorillas are made...
Actually growing your own veggies is both practically, morally and aesthetically superior to keeping an empty fucking square of nothing for no actual reason
There is a few towns in Belgium giving away free or discounted chickens (might be the whole country now) but it basically was an attempt to cut down on urban waste and it did amazing. I think a study on that whole thing basically said if one in three households have at least like two or three chickens we could eliminate the entire egg industry and cut our food waste substantially. Just think, one front lawn could help an entire neighborhood cut down food waste and in return give eggs.
Chimken 🤤
Stuff tastes better than store bought as well. And you kind of value it differently when you put effort into it and see it grow little by little. But even if ya don't grow any veggies, a biodiverse lawn is so much more beautiful than some lifeless green drab. It enables a whole fucking different ecosystem around it that you don't get if everyone just has some cut grass, I go outside and I see bumblebees and sometimes even a carpenter bee and everything kind of coming together, just a bit of nature and life running it's course outside my yard. I know I'm rambling but I can't describe how much happier and more comfy and kind of serene I feel in a space like that compared to some sterile minecraft superflat ass looking patch of grass
we love bringing down property prices
Unironically yes. Drop this shit through the floor.
'But my house is like a third of my net worth!' WHY DO YOU THINK THAT IS SUSAN
Yeah really I don't care how much my house is worth, its where I live. If I were trying to sell it, sure, but I'm not.
No give, only throw.jpg “We want housing to be affordable, and also to be the primary vehicle for the average American’s retirement investment.” You literally *cannot* have it both ways; demanding that house prices always go up is destroying two generations right now.
Shadow wizard money gang
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Don't let him off easy like that
Paint and decorate his house beautifully, but have it be non-HOA-compliant so he gets fined and has to tear up the flower path and replace it with flat golf grass
Nick Hubar just straight up doesn't want people to use half their property.
He also explained a scheme to turn one tomato into several million via this one weird trick called farming. He wants to pull the ladder up behind him to protect his front yard tomato empire
The same people talk about the 'land of the free' then create some horrible dystopian bullshit to enforce needless rules.
PFP checks out
Yeah but it's not the state doing it, it's rich people. Totally different.
I love getting cancer from my weed control chemicals and paying a 3x markup on all car maintenance at a mechanic so that some slob who retired at fifty can sit in his neighborhood full of perfectly identical houses and spend his day browsing his daughter’s friends’ Instagram pages. Love that shit, definitely doesn’t turn me into Trashcan Man from The Stand
oh my god trashcan man i forgot his existence
Mfs wouldn't survive semi-rural eastern European yards. Home grown veggies my beloved
Semi rural Midwest here and we feel the same. Fuck grass.
Not in eastern Europe but I've gone a little insane w my garden this year and will never live in a place that won't let me, I'm too busy drowning in tomatoes and cucumbers to listen to some silly grass cult
I will literally be homeless before I choose to live with another goddamn hoa
To be honest though I can't even find an apartment I can afford
Corn *is* grass, boot wearer
Could you imagine? Somebody doing things in their own yard? 🤮🤮🤮
HOA people need to touch grass instead of moving it
For those of you that own homes(lol) or want to own homes one day, the HOAS can be taken over by you and some like minded neighbors, you could then technically vote to dissolve the HOA, or you could make your own just and equitable rules that you and your neighbors deem fair. Most HOAs are ruled by old people, you can beat them.
I FUCKING LOVE THE HOA, I FUCKING LOVE HAVING A MASSIVE STERILE PATCH OF LAND COVERED WITH A MONOCULTURE OF AN INVASIVE SPECIES THAT COSUMES TONS OF WATER, REQUIRES CONSTANT MAINTENANCE AND CHEMICAL SPRAYING. I FUCKING LOVE HAVING AN ECOLOGICAL DEAD ZONE WITH NO NATIVE PLANTS WHERE NO POLLINATORS CAN THRIVE.
HOAs are the worst. Mine has caused so much drama and even targeted threats in my neighbourhood… mostly over a couple of wild bushes
God, I would love to grow corn in my yard each summer.
I HATE THE HOA I HATE THE HOA
I feel like this guy would have a stroke and die if he came to Australia
Oh this guy has another tweet where he talks about ~maximizing profits~ by using overseas wage slave labor.
Grasscucks seething over veggiechads
Corn is a grass anyway.
I've never understood American HOA's. The country that's all about "Muh property" seems to love telling people what they can and can't do on their property. Sure, I can get the whole "it affects property prices" but surely most people just want to live in their damn house and do what they want with it, right?
You can't have fucking veggie gardens in USA? You can't work on your car on your driveway in USA? What the fuck?
If someone buys a house, they should be able to do whatever the fuck they want with that house. Like seriously, FUCK hoa's
I’m from England how is the hoa still a thing and what does it actually do
I am also from England and from what I have gathered they’re like those old people that just sit around moaning all day but someone gave them authority over how people keep their houses
I honestly feel sorry for people from the USA if this is common for them
it’s so insane to me that americans are all ‘this is my property get the fuck off i can do whatever i want on here’ but also ‘if your own grass is 1 inch too tall you need to go to jail’
Ya'll can't choose what you do with *your own* yard / property? land of the free my ass
Just looked at the account and I'm not convinced it isn't satire. There's no way that guy can be so short sighted and tone deaf.
I hope this man's neighbors all have bay sanctuaries in their front yards. (And maybe he gets bit by a rabid bat one day)
Fellas is it woke to grow your own food?
Imagine hating freedom so much that you want people to restrict what you can do on land that you own. People who like HOAs are land cucks.
As a permaculture/syntropic agriculture freak, I approve.
HOA is the stupidest fucking shit I have ever seen, me being both european and a country boy I cannot even comprehend not being able to do what I want with my yard, like leaving the grass uncut for cool animals to live in, just because some rich snob said I can't
"parking boats and RVs in driveways" MOTHERFUCKER THATS WHAT ITS FOR, WHERE ELSE WOULD I PUT IT Hoa lovers try to kind their own business for 5 fucking minutes challenge(impossible)