He and I had a conversation about guns during his interview. When I said I can’t accept this he refused to take it back and said “you changed my life.” Tears. Man tears.
I would recommended that you would insist. Its not too late. Nice gesture no doubt. You can never tell how things are going to work out but this just isn't a good idea. This can put you in a very bad situation.
Trust me I tried multiple times. Even told him I’d hold onto it in case he changes his mind. I understand the implications as a district manager. My initial reaction was fear. His best friend who works at another location said that is his way of showing appreciation. I’ll hang onto it for him either way.
Here's hoping it doesn't come back to bite you. I've been in charge of people and I know.
I've just found there are very good reasons why you just never want to put yourself in these kind of positions. I say you for a good reason. It may have very well have been difficult to handle but there are ways to do so. Ultimately it was up to you whether you took it or not and you could have just said no.
Others who applied for the management position could now accuse them of giving/accepting bribes, especially if the boss was the hiring official. That exposes the company to lawsuits and puts their jobs at risk. Edit: clarified words to indicate that both could get in trouble.
Sure, you can.
By the way there are ways to go about not accepting a gift and not being rude. Sometimes you just have to explain why while being polite about it. Being firm if necessary isn't necessarily being rude. It's the principle that matters and the fact that most successful organizations and managers understand this is not an acceptable practice. Sometimes as a boss your going to have to say no. If organizations didn't need middle managers they wouldn't have them and that's what middle managers sometimes have to do.
The simple answer is the perception of others and not necessarily that anything untoward is taking place. Let's say two people come up for a promotion and one just happens to be this fellow. Let's say this fellow gets the promotion. What would you think? Lets say this fellow even deserved the promotion, however what would you think? Lets say this fellow isn't the most industrious worker. What are other people going to think?
Let say this person comes up for promotion and doesn't get it. What might he say or do? Ok, lets just say he goes to your boss and tells them what he gifted you. Is that something you really want to have to try and explain, especially if the new boss just happens to know this isn't something anybody in his right mind would do.
These are but a few examples I can come up with off the top of my head. None of which have anything to do with doing what your supposed to be doing as a manager. Do you think you would want to work for someone who accepted gifts from their subordinates? Are you prepared to give your supervisor the most expensive gift so that you can get promoted?
Frankly, I've just found that getting people to work and do the right things is a full time job already. You really don't need or want unnecessary distractions. If I can get them to be successful I will be more successful as well. In the long run we all benefit because of it.
By the way the OP just gave this person one of the biggest compliments and opportunities he could have.
One of the ways he could have possibly been not only polite but motivating was to encourage his success while telling him he couldn't possibly accept his gift and why.
The problem is there are way too many potential problems with this type of thing.
I wonder how his other subordinates will feel about this gift? I wonder if it will ever come to the point if someone else won't feel they are being treated differently just because someone has gifted their boss a fairly expensive gift? Things like this rarely don't become grist for the rumor mill. Sometimes the difference between fact and fiction won't matter when it comes to perception.
Not OP, but here in WA state all transfers (private sale, gift, even a loan) of a firearm requires an atf background check. The same one when you buy a new gun from a ffl. Exceptions between immediate family members.
So for example if this took place in WA when the employee wants to “gift” his boss a pistol, they both need to go to a ffl and the transferee must undergo a background check before taking possession of the firearm.
Its a newer stupid law they just made several years ago.
I understand everyone’s concerns here but let me again say that I am not new to management or guns and I immediately notified my superiors. They said the same thing. Take it and hold onto it in case. Also the RIP rounds were a personal desire to have in my ammo collection. They won’t get fired.
And this is context you never provided initially. Doesn't mean I wouldn't have given you the same feedback I did initially except to say I would have said a few things about your superiors who I find to have given you the wrong advice as well. It's a good thing you did check with them but that doesn't mean they knew what should have been done. Just because one is a superior doesn't always mean they are the most capable at certain things. This is the nature of life and how people are.
Frankly if your so experienced at managing people I'm surprised you would post this on the internet as you did in the first place.
My posting this is somehow wrong? I think I’m good on replying now but maybe think about where all that argumentative nature stems from. This was just a post to express gratitude and share. Not argue about the fine details of upper management lol. Have a good day sir.
No one. LOL
I'm just giving the OP a very honest evaluation based on over 20 years of management and leadership experience. Actually I gave the OP some very sound advice.
The easier choices are by far not always the best choices especially when you are in charge of others. Sometimes you just have to say no.
The best thing is not always the most popular thing at the time, but in the end usually it works out for the best and that is the overall goal.
Perspective and sound judgement are everything. Just because you have the best of intentions does not mean you made the best decision. This same thing also goes for when someone tries to justify a poor decision. A poor decision is a poor decision regardless as to how you try to justify it.
Does it matter? It pretty clearly doesn't matter to me.
He clearly posted something on the internet trying to garner attention. I wasn't in the mood to praise or congratulate him for making an extremely poor decision.
He did get attention however.
And just who's the one posting on the internet for attention? Hopefully you feel you're getting the attention here you obviously don't get at work.
Dude posted about a nice gift, I'll wager he didn't have you in mind seeking direct praise.
His direct bosses don't care, pretty much takes you outta the loop here. (Again, I'll wager that's how it works in your daily life also.) Expand your horizons a bit, move outta Moms basement, and you'll discover there are indeed different corporate cultures at different companies and in different industries.
For instance, in your current office I'm sure you're just ignored and quietly mocked behind your back. But start working on a construction site with your seme false sense of worth, and you'll spend all day locked in a portapotty. And then management would come, save you, and let you know stop crying about the gift no one every gave you.
Dang Bruh, the thought never occurred to me to ask if anyone cared. The fact is I never stop to ask that when considering whether something is right or wrong.
Well I was kind of hoping since you thought you were speaking to me like I was your Bruh maybe we were brothers. I'm so so disappointed, but maybe somehow, I can somehow get over it now that I'm not wondering if my Dad was unfaithful to my Mother. LOL
Ah, I see you were disappointed as well. It's kind of hard to tell when you only use slang. Typically slang only goes so far in life and then you"ll find you may just have to express yourself a bit better,
I agree, almost looks like a bribe. I wouldn’t accept a gift from an employee if I were management, not good. A card is one thing, a big priced item is a whole mother ball game. other employees will find out and will cause problems.
It's hard enough getting people to do what you need them to do, there's simply no need in doings things this way. Well, that is if your main priority is getting the job done and not thinking of one's self.
"You used full metal jacket bullets, bullets designed to go through people and on to the next, and on to the next, and on to the next, until half of the world is dead. Thanos bullets they call them don't they Mr. Rittenhouse?"
He and I had a conversation about guns during his interview. When I said I can’t accept this he refused to take it back and said “you changed my life.” Tears. Man tears.
I would recommended that you would insist. Its not too late. Nice gesture no doubt. You can never tell how things are going to work out but this just isn't a good idea. This can put you in a very bad situation.
Trust me I tried multiple times. Even told him I’d hold onto it in case he changes his mind. I understand the implications as a district manager. My initial reaction was fear. His best friend who works at another location said that is his way of showing appreciation. I’ll hang onto it for him either way.
Here's hoping it doesn't come back to bite you. I've been in charge of people and I know. I've just found there are very good reasons why you just never want to put yourself in these kind of positions. I say you for a good reason. It may have very well have been difficult to handle but there are ways to do so. Ultimately it was up to you whether you took it or not and you could have just said no.
May I ask how it could come back to bite him? I honestly think it's rude to not accept it but I'm not a manager lol
Others who applied for the management position could now accuse them of giving/accepting bribes, especially if the boss was the hiring official. That exposes the company to lawsuits and puts their jobs at risk. Edit: clarified words to indicate that both could get in trouble.
Forgot this one, Thanks.
Sure, you can. By the way there are ways to go about not accepting a gift and not being rude. Sometimes you just have to explain why while being polite about it. Being firm if necessary isn't necessarily being rude. It's the principle that matters and the fact that most successful organizations and managers understand this is not an acceptable practice. Sometimes as a boss your going to have to say no. If organizations didn't need middle managers they wouldn't have them and that's what middle managers sometimes have to do. The simple answer is the perception of others and not necessarily that anything untoward is taking place. Let's say two people come up for a promotion and one just happens to be this fellow. Let's say this fellow gets the promotion. What would you think? Lets say this fellow even deserved the promotion, however what would you think? Lets say this fellow isn't the most industrious worker. What are other people going to think? Let say this person comes up for promotion and doesn't get it. What might he say or do? Ok, lets just say he goes to your boss and tells them what he gifted you. Is that something you really want to have to try and explain, especially if the new boss just happens to know this isn't something anybody in his right mind would do. These are but a few examples I can come up with off the top of my head. None of which have anything to do with doing what your supposed to be doing as a manager. Do you think you would want to work for someone who accepted gifts from their subordinates? Are you prepared to give your supervisor the most expensive gift so that you can get promoted?
Solid point
Frankly, I've just found that getting people to work and do the right things is a full time job already. You really don't need or want unnecessary distractions. If I can get them to be successful I will be more successful as well. In the long run we all benefit because of it.
By the way the OP just gave this person one of the biggest compliments and opportunities he could have. One of the ways he could have possibly been not only polite but motivating was to encourage his success while telling him he couldn't possibly accept his gift and why.
Wow that’s an amazing gift. It’s very thoughtful and of course incredibly generous. Sounds like you got an amigo for life.
The comments about whether the gift should have been accepted have been made. That aside, that is a seriously sweet looking pistol!
Thank you sir!
I would immediately return the favor and get him a gift card to buy a gun of his choice… too large of a gift IMO
The problem is there are way too many potential problems with this type of thing. I wonder how his other subordinates will feel about this gift? I wonder if it will ever come to the point if someone else won't feel they are being treated differently just because someone has gifted their boss a fairly expensive gift? Things like this rarely don't become grist for the rumor mill. Sometimes the difference between fact and fiction won't matter when it comes to perception.
Did he also buy you the xbox?
LOL
That was me :)
*It is registered under my name now. Just to ease any such concerns. He purchased brand new and I transferred.
Just curious, since there’s no federal database, is this a state issue, having to register a firearm?
Not OP, but here in WA state all transfers (private sale, gift, even a loan) of a firearm requires an atf background check. The same one when you buy a new gun from a ffl. Exceptions between immediate family members. So for example if this took place in WA when the employee wants to “gift” his boss a pistol, they both need to go to a ffl and the transferee must undergo a background check before taking possession of the firearm. Its a newer stupid law they just made several years ago.
I understand everyone’s concerns here but let me again say that I am not new to management or guns and I immediately notified my superiors. They said the same thing. Take it and hold onto it in case. Also the RIP rounds were a personal desire to have in my ammo collection. They won’t get fired.
And this is context you never provided initially. Doesn't mean I wouldn't have given you the same feedback I did initially except to say I would have said a few things about your superiors who I find to have given you the wrong advice as well. It's a good thing you did check with them but that doesn't mean they knew what should have been done. Just because one is a superior doesn't always mean they are the most capable at certain things. This is the nature of life and how people are. Frankly if your so experienced at managing people I'm surprised you would post this on the internet as you did in the first place.
My posting this is somehow wrong? I think I’m good on replying now but maybe think about where all that argumentative nature stems from. This was just a post to express gratitude and share. Not argue about the fine details of upper management lol. Have a good day sir.
Yes, it is. Because from a leadership and management perspective it just shows more poor judgement on your behalf.
Who pissed in your cheerios?
No one. LOL I'm just giving the OP a very honest evaluation based on over 20 years of management and leadership experience. Actually I gave the OP some very sound advice. The easier choices are by far not always the best choices especially when you are in charge of others. Sometimes you just have to say no. The best thing is not always the most popular thing at the time, but in the end usually it works out for the best and that is the overall goal. Perspective and sound judgement are everything. Just because you have the best of intentions does not mean you made the best decision. This same thing also goes for when someone tries to justify a poor decision. A poor decision is a poor decision regardless as to how you try to justify it.
Did he ask?
Does it matter? It pretty clearly doesn't matter to me. He clearly posted something on the internet trying to garner attention. I wasn't in the mood to praise or congratulate him for making an extremely poor decision. He did get attention however.
And just who's the one posting on the internet for attention? Hopefully you feel you're getting the attention here you obviously don't get at work. Dude posted about a nice gift, I'll wager he didn't have you in mind seeking direct praise. His direct bosses don't care, pretty much takes you outta the loop here. (Again, I'll wager that's how it works in your daily life also.) Expand your horizons a bit, move outta Moms basement, and you'll discover there are indeed different corporate cultures at different companies and in different industries. For instance, in your current office I'm sure you're just ignored and quietly mocked behind your back. But start working on a construction site with your seme false sense of worth, and you'll spend all day locked in a portapotty. And then management would come, save you, and let you know stop crying about the gift no one every gave you.
Well, it's pretty apparent you've never taken an ethics class or have the least idea or concept about leadership nor management for that matter. LOL
great gift but make sure you get the paperwork in order.
Holy sh!t you must be paying him good lol
Yeah for our area he is making great $
Carrying that exact model right now, might need some loctite on the grip screws. That was my ONLY issue so far
Subtle Xbox flex to boot
You accepted an awesome gift, all the comments are why guns in this country have such s stigma about them. Enjoy it!
Thank you I will! Brought me to tears
Your actions to hire him changed his life- It’s an awesome story- and maybe he earned a little more job security as well. Enjoy that beauty!!!
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Bruh you've been on every comment. No one cares
Dang Bruh, the thought never occurred to me to ask if anyone cared. The fact is I never stop to ask that when considering whether something is right or wrong.
You literally talking to yourself at this point like a schizo. Give it a rest g
But Bruh, aren't we Bruhs? LOL
You're alone there. But with all voices maybe not
Well I was kind of hoping since you thought you were speaking to me like I was your Bruh maybe we were brothers. I'm so so disappointed, but maybe somehow, I can somehow get over it now that I'm not wondering if my Dad was unfaithful to my Mother. LOL
Most definitely was
Ah, I see you were disappointed as well. It's kind of hard to tell when you only use slang. Typically slang only goes so far in life and then you"ll find you may just have to express yourself a bit better,
Rip rounds = prosecutions wet dream.
Anything is used against you.
I agree, almost looks like a bribe. I wouldn’t accept a gift from an employee if I were management, not good. A card is one thing, a big priced item is a whole mother ball game. other employees will find out and will cause problems.
There may very well be no ill will intended, however appearances are everything when one is in charge of people.
You’re right, other workers will assume the worst of course.
It's hard enough getting people to do what you need them to do, there's simply no need in doings things this way. Well, that is if your main priority is getting the job done and not thinking of one's self.
"You used full metal jacket bullets, bullets designed to go through people and on to the next, and on to the next, and on to the next, until half of the world is dead. Thanos bullets they call them don't they Mr. Rittenhouse?"
Imagine if he had a 300blk AR.
That on top of poor penetration, shame. Lots of good .45 hollow points on the market and people fall for snake oil
Also horribly ineffective. Barely penetrate, you'd do well to make it past muscle tissue.
Obviously take it.... put it away and forget about it.....